1
00:00:50,140 --> 00:00:52,138
What's new that's in that's good?

2
00:00:54,339 --> 00:00:56,183
You are aware...

3
00:00:56,184 --> 00:00:58,307
that there are over 100 years of cinema

4
00:00:58,308 --> 00:00:59,536
released before this week?

5
00:00:59,537 --> 00:01:01,255
But I'm interested in new releases.

6
00:01:01,256 --> 00:01:02,923
Why?

7
00:01:02,924 --> 00:01:04,758
Why is something new somehow better?

8
00:01:04,759 --> 00:01:07,394
Crystal Pepsi is new, and it sucks.

9
00:01:08,367 --> 00:01:09,463
Can you help me?

10
00:01:09,464 --> 00:01:12,149
Yeah, the new releases
are right over there.

11
00:01:12,150 --> 00:01:14,668
Oh, check out Twister. It's crunk!

12
00:01:17,155 --> 00:01:19,656
Why are you so terrible to customers?

13
00:01:19,657 --> 00:01:21,692
Because film matters.

14
00:01:21,693 --> 00:01:24,661
There is no other medium
that holds a mirror

15
00:01:24,662 --> 00:01:26,930
to the human condition
as nakedly as film does,

16
00:01:26,931 --> 00:01:30,684
that speaks directly to our pain
and sorrow and joy like cinema.

17
00:01:30,685 --> 00:01:32,419
Nothing else comes close.

18
00:01:32,420 --> 00:01:34,321
Then you obviously haven't listened

19
00:01:34,322 --> 00:01:36,483
to the new Sarah McLachlan album.

20
00:01:38,077 --> 00:01:40,427
When's the last time anyone
even rented anything

21
00:01:40,428 --> 00:01:41,962
from your weird-ass shelf?

22
00:01:45,178 --> 00:01:46,685
Where's Space Jam?

23
00:01:46,710 --> 00:01:49,177
All our copies burned up in a fire.

24
00:01:49,803 --> 00:01:50,960
Go away.

25
00:02:11,841 --> 00:02:16,841
Sync and corrections by btsix
www.addic7ed.com

26
00:02:34,065 --> 00:02:37,074
Jakey. Jake! It's happening.

27
00:02:52,632 --> 00:02:54,599
Who's Jake?

28
00:02:54,600 --> 00:02:56,787
I want to give him my props.

29
00:02:57,192 --> 00:02:58,826
I'm-I'm Jake.

30
00:02:58,851 --> 00:03:01,692
- Oh.
- Hi. Jake.

31
00:03:01,693 --> 00:03:04,060
The props are for me.

32
00:03:05,070 --> 00:03:07,598
Hmm. So, you're the plagiarist.

33
00:03:07,599 --> 00:03:09,100
- What?
- I'm working through

34
00:03:09,101 --> 00:03:10,452
Androuet-Jacques Soufflot's list

35
00:03:10,453 --> 00:03:12,219
of seminal cult and obscure films

36
00:03:12,220 --> 00:03:14,545
from Critique de Cinéma,
and you have clearly

37
00:03:14,546 --> 00:03:17,157
just ripped off his entire
list for your section.

38
00:03:17,158 --> 00:03:20,912
I mean, sure, Soufflot
was an inspiration...

39
00:03:20,913 --> 00:03:23,463
I knew it. Sneak.

40
00:03:25,900 --> 00:03:27,195
M-May I?

41
00:03:32,600 --> 00:03:34,570
Whoa. You'll be done
after you watch these.

42
00:03:35,585 --> 00:03:37,070
- Mm-hmm.
- I'm impressed.

43
00:03:37,095 --> 00:03:40,330
That means you made it
through the beheading scene

44
00:03:40,331 --> 00:03:42,216
of Bivouacs of Redemption.

45
00:03:42,217 --> 00:03:44,685
Ew! That was so disgusting.

46
00:03:44,686 --> 00:03:47,187
- I know, wasn't it?!
- There was so much blood.

47
00:03:47,188 --> 00:03:49,423
The way his larynx kept flapping.

48
00:03:54,176 --> 00:03:55,241
Oh, here.

49
00:04:00,251 --> 00:04:02,753
When you're done watching
these, we should get a drink.

50
00:04:03,325 --> 00:04:05,189
Come on, man. You know
that list can never

51
00:04:05,190 --> 00:04:07,038
technically be completed.

52
00:04:07,924 --> 00:04:09,425
The Intransigence of Love.

53
00:04:09,426 --> 00:04:11,051
Oh, come on. That one doesn't count.

54
00:04:11,052 --> 00:04:12,473
It's impossible to find a copy.

55
00:04:12,474 --> 00:04:14,355
Rumor has it it's
basically a snuff film.

56
00:04:14,356 --> 00:04:16,605
I know. I have to see it.

57
00:04:19,634 --> 00:04:23,030
Well, Jake... it has been a pleasure.

58
00:04:24,333 --> 00:04:26,641
And I will get that drink with you.

59
00:04:27,524 --> 00:04:29,317
Soon as you find me that movie.

60
00:04:32,153 --> 00:04:35,277
- You have to find that movie.
- Yeah, I know!

61
00:04:35,278 --> 00:04:36,954
But how?

62
00:04:36,955 --> 00:04:39,022
You're gonna have to go onto

63
00:04:39,023 --> 00:04:42,390
the information superhighway, baby.

64
00:04:50,772 --> 00:04:52,272
Welcome.

65
00:05:03,525 --> 00:05:04,784
File's done.

66
00:05:06,535 --> 00:05:08,433
You've got pictures.

67
00:05:09,277 --> 00:05:12,174
- Ugh! Come on.
- I can't take it.

68
00:05:12,175 --> 00:05:13,442
Stand back.

69
00:05:32,317 --> 00:05:34,793
I'm in! I hacked into
Professor Soufflot's computer

70
00:05:34,794 --> 00:05:37,283
at the Sorbonne, and I
located a digital copy

71
00:05:37,284 --> 00:05:39,435
of The Intransigence
of Love in his files.

72
00:05:39,436 --> 00:05:41,222
That's amazing! Love the Internet!

73
00:05:41,223 --> 00:05:43,906
It's password-protected,
so I can't download it.

74
00:05:43,907 --> 00:05:45,741
Damn it! Hate the Internet!

75
00:05:45,742 --> 00:05:50,095
We have to go into... cyberspace.

76
00:05:51,918 --> 00:05:52,933
Ready?

77
00:05:52,934 --> 00:05:54,049
Are you sure this...?

78
00:06:01,105 --> 00:06:02,508
Whoa.

79
00:06:02,727 --> 00:06:04,678
Oh. The movies!

80
00:06:11,184 --> 00:06:12,834
Are you looking?

81
00:06:15,923 --> 00:06:17,489
I can't find it.

82
00:06:17,490 --> 00:06:19,212
Well, keep looking.

83
00:06:22,637 --> 00:06:24,967
- What was that?
- I think he's coming.

84
00:06:24,968 --> 00:06:27,283
Bonjour. Who is there?

85
00:06:27,284 --> 00:06:30,370
- Look, hurry up!
- I'm trying!

86
00:06:30,371 --> 00:06:32,465
He's getting closer.

87
00:06:32,466 --> 00:06:34,277
Almost there.

88
00:06:34,278 --> 00:06:36,988
- Almost there.
- Dude!

89
00:06:39,371 --> 00:06:41,871
- I got it!
- We got to jack out of here!

90
00:06:42,328 --> 00:06:44,033
Let's go!

91
00:06:51,971 --> 00:06:53,643
- Yeah.
- Yes!

92
00:07:02,296 --> 00:07:05,371
? Good night, you child of England ?

93
00:07:05,372 --> 00:07:08,984
? Your time on Earth is past ?

94
00:07:08,985 --> 00:07:12,644
? Say hello to all of history ?

95
00:07:12,645 --> 00:07:15,960
? Be with them everlast ?

96
00:07:15,961 --> 00:07:19,568
? You gave your everything ?

97
00:07:19,569 --> 00:07:22,966
? To the weak and poor ?

98
00:07:22,967 --> 00:07:26,583
? Now God has come to France ?

99
00:07:26,584 --> 00:07:29,912
? And opened your last door ?

100
00:07:29,913 --> 00:07:31,847
? Di... ?

101
00:07:32,820 --> 00:07:34,516
Hi. Jake.

102
00:07:34,517 --> 00:07:36,201
- Hey! Oh, my God.
- Hey!

103
00:07:36,202 --> 00:07:37,436
Whoa.

104
00:07:37,437 --> 00:07:38,737
Can you believe this?

105
00:07:38,738 --> 00:07:40,906
Oh, yeah. S-So tragic.

106
00:07:40,907 --> 00:07:43,642
Yeah, we're both truly shattered...

107
00:07:43,643 --> 00:07:46,522
I have amazing news. I found it.

108
00:07:46,523 --> 00:07:48,047
The Intransigence of Love.

109
00:07:48,048 --> 00:07:50,646
What?! Are you...?! How?!

110
00:07:50,647 --> 00:07:54,837
Could they have taken away our
beautiful princess so early?

111
00:07:57,340 --> 00:07:59,349
Wait, w-we have to watch
it. When are you free?

112
00:07:59,350 --> 00:08:00,843
Um, let me check my schedule.

113
00:08:00,844 --> 00:08:02,745
But pretty much literally anytime.

114
00:08:03,880 --> 00:08:07,694
? Gave your everything ?

115
00:08:07,695 --> 00:08:10,724
? To the weak and poor ?

116
00:08:10,725 --> 00:08:14,107
? Now God has come to France ?

117
00:08:14,108 --> 00:08:15,874
- Oh, can I see?
- Oh, yeah.

118
00:08:15,875 --> 00:08:18,343
? And opened that last door for Di. ?

119
00:08:18,344 --> 00:08:20,579
Oh, wait, get those three
together right there.

120
00:08:20,814 --> 00:08:23,028
- No, no.
- Take it.

121
00:08:23,601 --> 00:08:25,196
Okay.

122
00:08:28,373 --> 00:08:30,154
- Great framing.
- Mm.

123
00:08:30,531 --> 00:08:32,804
Oh, really good
composition. That's nice.

124
00:08:35,796 --> 00:08:37,279
Gemma, you're a natural.

125
00:08:37,280 --> 00:08:38,614
You should be making movies, too.

126
00:08:38,615 --> 00:08:41,838
No. Some people were
just meant to watch.

127
00:08:42,502 --> 00:08:45,154
Babe! Babe. Whassup...?!

128
00:08:45,155 --> 00:08:48,303
Ooh.

129
00:08:48,304 --> 00:08:49,685
Hey. How's it going?

130
00:08:49,686 --> 00:08:50,943
Fine?

131
00:08:50,944 --> 00:08:51,944
Wha...?

132
00:08:53,397 --> 00:08:55,443
- Uh...
- Greg, this is Jake and Ziggy.

133
00:08:55,444 --> 00:08:56,915
They're from the video store.

134
00:08:58,330 --> 00:08:59,935
Mm. Nice to meet you guys.

135
00:08:59,960 --> 00:09:01,060
Not!

136
00:09:01,921 --> 00:09:04,037
Let's go. This party's gay.

137
00:09:04,530 --> 00:09:05,834
Come on, we're going.

138
00:09:05,835 --> 00:09:07,989
Um, I'll see you later.

139
00:09:52,639 --> 00:09:54,869
Do you ever
think about your own death?

140
00:09:55,426 --> 00:09:57,028
But of course.

141
00:10:00,517 --> 00:10:02,230
Closed!

142
00:10:02,231 --> 00:10:03,652
Jake?

143
00:10:04,636 --> 00:10:06,106
Jake!

144
00:10:08,152 --> 00:10:09,268
Jake!

145
00:10:14,939 --> 00:10:16,449
Hey.

146
00:10:17,247 --> 00:10:19,346
What happened? Are-are you okay?

147
00:10:19,347 --> 00:10:21,316
Have you, uh, watched our movie yet?

148
00:10:21,317 --> 00:10:22,734
No.

149
00:10:22,735 --> 00:10:24,436
Can we watch it now?

150
00:10:24,437 --> 00:10:26,609
Yes. Of course.

151
00:10:27,373 --> 00:10:28,807
Okay.

152
00:10:28,808 --> 00:10:31,142
Ugh, I'm so excited to watch a movie

153
00:10:31,143 --> 00:10:36,089
that doesn't have Jean-Claude
Van Damme or Chris Klein in it.

154
00:10:38,409 --> 00:10:43,736
Uh, yeah, actually, uh, Chris
Klein's in this one, too, so...

155
00:10:54,578 --> 00:10:55,992
Twizzlers?

156
00:10:56,017 --> 00:10:57,644
Don't tell me you're a Red Vines guy.

157
00:10:57,645 --> 00:10:59,754
Oh, Red Vines till I die.

158
00:10:59,755 --> 00:11:02,799
Oh, no. This will never work, then.

159
00:11:05,778 --> 00:11:08,909
So, how long have you worked here?

160
00:11:10,134 --> 00:11:12,002
- Uh, three years.
- Huh.

161
00:11:13,415 --> 00:11:16,932
You know, you're the first person
to ever appreciate my section?

162
00:11:16,957 --> 00:11:18,741
- Seriously?
- Yeah.

163
00:11:20,322 --> 00:11:22,844
Well, these movies, they aren't perfect,

164
00:11:22,845 --> 00:11:25,247
but they're not trying to be.

165
00:11:25,985 --> 00:11:29,882
No, they're messy and complicated

166
00:11:29,883 --> 00:11:33,939
because life is messy and complicated.

167
00:11:34,540 --> 00:11:38,277
They were forged out of
passion and madness,

168
00:11:38,278 --> 00:11:40,846
and sometimes just a holy desire

169
00:11:40,847 --> 00:11:44,383
to make something ugly and
uncomfortable and haunting

170
00:11:44,384 --> 00:11:48,403
and brilliant and thrilling.

171
00:11:48,935 --> 00:11:51,611
And that's beautiful.

172
00:11:52,950 --> 00:11:54,900
At least to me.

173
00:11:54,901 --> 00:11:57,502
And besides, everything
else is just so...

174
00:12:09,102 --> 00:12:11,143
- Ah.
- Oh, sorry.

175
00:12:11,144 --> 00:12:13,161
No, it's... go ahead, just hurry.

176
00:12:13,162 --> 00:12:14,734
Okay.

177
00:12:18,017 --> 00:12:20,330
- My chain wallet's stuck.
- Okay.

178
00:13:12,800 --> 00:13:14,669
Babe.

179
00:13:28,255 --> 00:13:30,249
- Yeah, what is it?
- I'm sorry.

180
00:13:30,250 --> 00:13:31,707
- What do you want?
- I wasn't in my head.

181
00:13:31,708 --> 00:13:33,341
- I wasn't...
- Oh, really? No kidding.

182
00:13:33,342 --> 00:13:35,560
- I was stupid. I'm sorry.
- You think?

183
00:13:39,033 --> 00:13:40,399
Sorry.

184
00:13:48,265 --> 00:13:49,975
Wait, wait, wait.

185
00:13:49,976 --> 00:13:51,610
Excuse me.

186
00:13:51,611 --> 00:13:53,082
Hold on a sec.

187
00:13:54,015 --> 00:13:56,491
Let me get this straight, in
your version the girl leaves?

188
00:13:56,492 --> 00:13:58,272
I mean, I leave?

189
00:13:58,273 --> 00:13:59,678
That's how you remember it?

190
00:13:59,679 --> 00:14:01,136
It's okay, sweetie.

191
00:14:01,137 --> 00:14:04,342
I forgave you long ago.

192
00:14:04,343 --> 00:14:06,702
Now let me finish our story.

193
00:14:06,703 --> 00:14:08,493
- So...
- I'm tapping in.

194
00:14:19,625 --> 00:14:24,739
_

195
00:15:08,602 --> 00:15:10,738
Nice camera, where'd you get it?

196
00:15:33,813 --> 00:15:35,981
I stole it from this lame guy who worked

197
00:15:35,982 --> 00:15:38,241
at a video store a few years ago.

198
00:15:38,242 --> 00:15:39,568
You think he wants it back?

199
00:15:39,569 --> 00:15:43,009
No. It looks good on you.

200
00:15:43,823 --> 00:15:46,793
Anyway, I just write about film now.

201
00:15:49,206 --> 00:15:50,206
Hi.

202
00:15:51,267 --> 00:15:52,267
Hi.

203
00:15:54,468 --> 00:15:56,304
Champagne?

204
00:15:56,305 --> 00:15:57,944
Mm-hmm.

205
00:15:57,945 --> 00:16:00,489
Oh.

206
00:16:02,720 --> 00:16:05,850
Film school? that's fantastic.

207
00:16:05,851 --> 00:16:08,768
I basically learn about movies all day.

208
00:16:08,793 --> 00:16:10,694
It's a goddamn dream.

209
00:16:10,960 --> 00:16:13,929
Anyway, thanks for encouraging me.

210
00:16:16,231 --> 00:16:17,703
Hey.

211
00:16:17,728 --> 00:16:20,842
Just in case this computer
apocalypse does happen,

212
00:16:20,843 --> 00:16:22,900
we should probably get in one dance.

213
00:16:23,282 --> 00:16:24,882
Yeah.

214
00:16:31,835 --> 00:16:35,404
How was our movie? Did a guy really die?

215
00:16:36,196 --> 00:16:38,871
I... I never watched it.

216
00:16:38,872 --> 00:16:41,233
2000 is around the corner.
Here we go. You ready?

217
00:16:41,234 --> 00:16:42,678
Didn't feel right without you.

218
00:16:42,679 --> 00:16:44,015
Let's start this.

219
00:16:44,016 --> 00:16:46,751
- Ten! Nine! Eight!
- Listen...

220
00:16:46,752 --> 00:16:48,837
- Seven! Six! Five!
- If we survive the night,

221
00:16:48,838 --> 00:16:51,413
it means we were meant to
watch it together. Deal?

222
00:16:51,414 --> 00:16:53,074
- Deal.
- Three! Two! One!

223
00:16:53,075 --> 00:16:55,844
Aah, Y2K!

224
00:16:55,845 --> 00:16:58,984
Ha-ha, just kidding.
Just kidding, guys.

225
00:16:58,985 --> 00:17:00,713
You suck, Dennis!

226
00:17:09,194 --> 00:17:10,732
I need you to come back to my place

227
00:17:10,733 --> 00:17:12,788
and fuck me, like, yesterday.

228
00:17:12,789 --> 00:17:14,507
Gemma, listen, uh...

229
00:17:14,508 --> 00:17:17,819
- Hey, aren't you...?
- Babe, let's go.

230
00:17:17,820 --> 00:17:21,290
We're going to a rave.

231
00:17:23,484 --> 00:17:25,085
I'm sorry.

232
00:17:38,647 --> 00:17:40,944
You're just gonna let him go?

233
00:17:41,258 --> 00:17:43,713
If he looks up, I'm
supposed to go to him.

234
00:17:49,408 --> 00:17:53,272
If she looks down, I'm
supposed to go to her.

235
00:17:54,484 --> 00:17:56,058
Sorry, man.

236
00:17:57,157 --> 00:17:58,840
Yeah!

237
00:17:58,841 --> 00:18:00,568
Why are you looking at me like that?

238
00:18:00,569 --> 00:18:04,283
You guys are clearly soul mates
and you're just standing there.

239
00:18:04,741 --> 00:18:06,736
That's so straight of you.

240
00:18:10,661 --> 00:18:11,882
Let's go sit down.

241
00:18:44,899 --> 00:18:47,499
So I said, "No,
that's a whoopie pie."

242
00:18:48,750 --> 00:18:49,841
Pierre.

243
00:18:49,842 --> 00:18:52,010
Gemma, how does it
feel to have the first

244
00:18:52,011 --> 00:18:54,312
international, mainstream,
cult blockbuster?

245
00:18:54,313 --> 00:18:57,816
I feel incredibly fortunate to
have found a way to make a movie

246
00:18:57,817 --> 00:18:59,601
that resonates with the audience,

247
00:18:59,602 --> 00:19:03,138
despite being filled with graphic sex

248
00:19:03,139 --> 00:19:06,374
and so many murders.

249
00:19:06,375 --> 00:19:09,249
Okay, guys. We just have
time for one more question.

250
00:19:09,250 --> 00:19:11,295
What is it like to be
the youngest recipient

251
00:19:11,296 --> 00:19:13,561
of the Lifetime Achievement
Award while still being so hot?

252
00:19:13,562 --> 00:19:15,513
Is it true you used real cow blood?

253
00:19:15,514 --> 00:19:18,552
Yes, I have a question. Um...

254
00:19:18,553 --> 00:19:21,506
how much did your first camera cost?

255
00:19:23,843 --> 00:19:28,517
Interesting story. I
actually got it from...

256
00:19:43,700 --> 00:19:47,213
The reporter who asked you
that question was me?

257
00:19:51,116 --> 00:19:52,514
Your turn, sweetie.

258
00:19:52,539 --> 00:19:54,498
No, this is all you,
baby. You take it home.

259
00:20:00,541 --> 00:20:05,350
Anyway, there I was, stunned to shit.

260
00:20:05,351 --> 00:20:07,877
I leaned into the mic.

261
00:20:08,399 --> 00:20:10,334
I actually got it from...

262
00:20:11,073 --> 00:20:14,849
the love of my complicated, messy life.

263
00:20:22,430 --> 00:20:24,678
What are you doing here?

264
00:20:24,679 --> 00:20:28,072
I'm the lead film critic
for the big Paris paper.

265
00:20:28,710 --> 00:20:31,926
You were right, Gemma,
some people are just meant

266
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to watch the movies, but it wasn't you.

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It was me.

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Hello? Hello?

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I was alive this whole time!

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And that's our story.

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So, let me tell you about our rates.

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Ah. Did we ever watch
the movie, you ask?

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So, you see, I actually brought

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the copy of the movie to the festival.

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And as we were headed to watch it,

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the French cinephile Ziggy and I
stole the tape from found us.

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Androuet-Jacques Soufflot!

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Quelle terrible.

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00:21:47,036 --> 00:21:49,731
Hey, follow me if you want to live.

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After we thanked Ziggy
for leading us to freedom...

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00:22:08,778 --> 00:22:11,676
No, dude. It was you all along.

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00:22:11,677 --> 00:22:15,029
- What are you talking about?
- There never was any Ziggy.

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I know.

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00:22:19,651 --> 00:22:21,050
But how?

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00:22:23,200 --> 00:22:26,468
Aw, nice catch, dude.
Right in the mouth.

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00:22:27,064 --> 00:22:29,064
Whoa!

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00:22:30,893 --> 00:22:32,017
Yes!

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00:22:34,368 --> 00:22:36,518
My dad really messed me up.

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00:22:38,812 --> 00:22:41,693
Thanks, dude. You're my best friend.

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00:22:42,430 --> 00:22:44,464
Aw, shit. Twist!

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00:22:50,828 --> 00:22:52,286
We'll let you know.

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00:22:55,455 --> 00:22:56,667
Oh.

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00:22:57,339 --> 00:23:00,213
- So, should we go with her?
- Absolutely not.

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00:23:00,214 --> 00:23:02,143
Did you see those
horrible hurricane lamps

295
00:23:02,144 --> 00:23:04,947
she used in every ceremony? So hacky.

296
00:23:04,948 --> 00:23:07,887
Yeah, she sucked. Hey.

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00:23:08,706 --> 00:23:10,601
Why do you think we keep
telling wedding planners

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00:23:10,602 --> 00:23:12,850
these hella tight but
fake stories about us?

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00:23:13,405 --> 00:23:15,845
Is it because we don't
have a love story?

300
00:23:15,846 --> 00:23:20,103
What? We have the best love story

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00:23:20,104 --> 00:23:24,744
because ours is ugly and
uncomfortable and haunting

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00:23:24,745 --> 00:23:26,720
and brilliant and thrilling

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00:23:26,721 --> 00:23:31,906
and, yeah, it's messy and
complicated, but it's true.

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00:23:32,386 --> 00:23:36,174
And that's beautiful, at least to me.

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00:23:36,498 --> 00:23:38,111
To me, too.

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00:23:38,112 --> 00:23:41,749
Hey, you know that Princess
Di really is dead, right?

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00:23:41,750 --> 00:23:44,764
Yeah, Jimmy. So's JonBenét.

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_

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Sync and corrections by btsix
www.addic7ed.com