1
00:00:00,309 --> 00:00:03,865
- Synced and corrected by medvidecek007 -
- www.addic7ed.com -

2
00:00:10,697 --> 00:00:13,064
I figure we can live in
your van for a while.

3
00:00:13,066 --> 00:00:14,966
We'll get a crib at a yard sale,

4
00:00:14,968 --> 00:00:16,814
and you and I could, you know...

5
00:00:16,820 --> 00:00:18,537
Share a sleeping bag.

6
00:00:18,539 --> 00:00:20,778
I'm not sure I'm ready to be a dad.

7
00:00:20,784 --> 00:00:23,708
Maybe I should just stay in town,

8
00:00:23,710 --> 00:00:25,043
you know, talk to Tommy,

9
00:00:25,045 --> 00:00:26,645
father to ex-father.

10
00:00:26,647 --> 00:00:28,313
Yeah, bad idea.

11
00:00:28,315 --> 00:00:30,215
Grab my shit. We gotta roll.

12
00:00:32,753 --> 00:00:33,817
Hey, Vivian.

13
00:00:33,823 --> 00:00:35,720
Um, you're probably
putting Clark to bed.

14
00:00:35,722 --> 00:00:37,248
Please call me if you get the

15
00:00:37,254 --> 00:00:39,248
paternity results in the mail today.

16
00:00:39,254 --> 00:00:41,923
I mean, I can't get romantic
on this romantic weekend

17
00:00:41,929 --> 00:00:43,695
unless I know who the father is.

18
00:00:43,697 --> 00:00:44,992
Okay, so,

19
00:00:44,998 --> 00:00:46,598
I need you to drink this wine,

20
00:00:46,604 --> 00:00:48,003
and when you're done soaking,

21
00:00:48,005 --> 00:00:50,038
put on this underwear
and this blindfold.

22
00:00:50,040 --> 00:00:53,108
Tonight is gonna be 50 shades of great.

23
00:00:53,110 --> 00:00:54,910
Ooh.

24
00:00:57,581 --> 00:00:59,381
Seriously, please call me.

25
00:01:01,051 --> 00:01:02,718
Okay, just a little further.

26
00:01:02,720 --> 00:01:04,019
Okay.

27
00:01:04,021 --> 00:01:05,854
Oh, my Gosh. I'm getting nervous.

28
00:01:05,856 --> 00:01:07,155
- Don't be. Don't be.
- Okay.

29
00:01:07,157 --> 00:01:08,724
- I shouldn't be nervous?
- No.

30
00:01:08,726 --> 00:01:10,425
- Okay.
- Trust me.

31
00:01:10,427 --> 00:01:12,394
Okay, a little further,
further, further.

32
00:01:12,396 --> 00:01:13,695
And... stop.

33
00:01:13,697 --> 00:01:16,398
- Oh, whoa. Whoa.
- Okay.

34
00:01:16,400 --> 00:01:17,833
All right.

35
00:01:22,439 --> 00:01:23,538
And...

36
00:01:23,540 --> 00:01:24,740
Ah.

37
00:01:26,477 --> 00:01:27,776
Surprise!

38
00:01:28,912 --> 00:01:30,269
What's going on?

39
00:01:30,275 --> 00:01:31,896
We're getting married.

40
00:01:31,902 --> 00:01:33,782
Honey, what's the worst
part of a wedding?

41
00:01:33,784 --> 00:01:35,022
The stress. Picking a date.

42
00:01:35,028 --> 00:01:36,351
Planning it. Paying for it.

43
00:01:36,353 --> 00:01:37,786
I think that's why you've
been so anxious lately.

44
00:01:37,788 --> 00:01:39,418
But we can avoid all of that

45
00:01:39,424 --> 00:01:41,556
by having our own ceremony, together,

46
00:01:41,558 --> 00:01:42,924
here, tonight.

47
00:01:42,926 --> 00:01:44,693
- Tonight.
- We'll exchange our vows...

48
00:01:44,695 --> 00:01:47,329
I wrote mine while you were
having a bit of a soak.

49
00:01:47,331 --> 00:01:48,653
I could probably edit them a touch.

50
00:01:48,659 --> 00:01:50,610
Went down a bit of a rabbit
hole comparing my love

51
00:01:50,616 --> 00:01:52,369
for you with the migration
patterns of geese.

52
00:01:52,375 --> 00:01:54,167
It ends in a beautiful
haiku, except, not unlike

53
00:01:54,173 --> 00:01:55,704
the geese, bit of a
journey to get there.

54
00:01:55,706 --> 00:01:57,906
Anyways, after vows, then we will kiss

55
00:01:57,908 --> 00:02:00,308
and then we will exchange these rings

56
00:02:00,310 --> 00:02:01,639
that I got on Etsy.

57
00:02:01,645 --> 00:02:04,312
They're made of distressed barn wood.

58
00:02:06,650 --> 00:02:09,076
That's my favorite kind of wood.

59
00:02:09,082 --> 00:02:10,279
I know.

60
00:02:10,285 --> 00:02:11,718
Of course, nothing's official

61
00:02:11,724 --> 00:02:13,084
till we go to the courthouse on Monday,

62
00:02:13,090 --> 00:02:14,356
but I didn't want to wait any longer.

63
00:02:14,358 --> 00:02:15,991
I love you, and I want to spend

64
00:02:15,993 --> 00:02:18,193
the rest of my life
with you and our son.

65
00:02:19,096 --> 00:02:22,531
Nikki, when a goose feels
the first chill of winter...

66
00:02:22,533 --> 00:02:24,043
I'm sorry.

67
00:02:24,131 --> 00:02:26,234
I promised myself I'd
save it for the ceremony.

68
00:02:26,236 --> 00:02:27,703
Well, we...

69
00:02:27,705 --> 00:02:29,471
I'll go write my vows now.

70
00:02:29,473 --> 00:02:30,503
Okay. Great.

71
00:02:30,509 --> 00:02:31,773
Well, I will light some candles.

72
00:02:31,775 --> 00:02:33,075
Uh, this is gonna be perfect.

73
00:02:33,077 --> 00:02:34,498
Just the two of us.

74
00:02:34,504 --> 00:02:36,211
Asking Vivian to watch
the baby this weekend

75
00:02:36,213 --> 00:02:37,612
might have been the best
idea I've ever had.

76
00:02:49,419 --> 00:02:51,282
You're gonna have to drive faster

77
00:02:51,288 --> 00:02:52,894
if we want to get out
of town with this baby

78
00:02:52,896 --> 00:02:54,496
sometime this month.

79
00:02:55,076 --> 00:02:56,965
I'm not driving too fast

80
00:02:56,967 --> 00:02:59,616
until I get some fresh
beans in that bag.

81
00:02:59,622 --> 00:03:00,936
Where are we going, by the way?

82
00:03:00,938 --> 00:03:02,037
I don't have a lot of gas.

83
00:03:02,039 --> 00:03:03,338
Or money for gas.

84
00:03:03,340 --> 00:03:05,675
Well, I got my tips from today,

85
00:03:05,681 --> 00:03:07,214
but they're not great.

86
00:03:07,511 --> 00:03:09,511
Tommy bought some oysters
out of a guy's briefcase.

87
00:03:09,513 --> 00:03:11,813
People were throwing up
before the bill came.

88
00:03:14,418 --> 00:03:16,051
Actually, you know what? Turn around.

89
00:03:16,053 --> 00:03:17,586
I think I left some money at work.

90
00:03:21,725 --> 00:03:25,160
? I have a feeling ?

91
00:03:27,998 --> 00:03:30,532
Vivian, it's me again.
Why aren't you picking up?

92
00:03:30,534 --> 00:03:33,068
Um, okay, so I'm gonna need
you to call the beach house

93
00:03:33,070 --> 00:03:35,303
and just make up an
excuse so I can leave,

94
00:03:35,305 --> 00:03:38,406
because Tommy just sprang
a surprise wedding on me.

95
00:03:38,408 --> 00:03:41,243
So, right now, I'm sitting
in a wedding dress,

96
00:03:41,245 --> 00:03:43,712
on the same bed where
I slept with Bodhi.

97
00:03:52,027 --> 00:03:53,293
Okay, look,

98
00:03:53,299 --> 00:03:55,100
if you get this message, don't call the

99
00:03:55,106 --> 00:03:56,667
beach house. Don't call the beach house.

100
00:03:56,673 --> 00:03:58,142
I'm gonna make up an excuse and

101
00:03:58,148 --> 00:03:59,761
come get Clark so I can stall.

102
00:03:59,763 --> 00:04:01,821
Vivian called. She can't burp Clark,

103
00:04:01,827 --> 00:04:03,337
and she's afraid he's gonna explode.

104
00:04:03,343 --> 00:04:05,963
So, hopefully, I won't have
to bring him home with me.

105
00:04:05,969 --> 00:04:08,270
Uh, but you've been drinking.

106
00:04:08,772 --> 00:04:10,572
I'll... walk.

107
00:04:11,129 --> 00:04:12,362
All right, well, walk slow.

108
00:04:12,368 --> 00:04:13,834
We don't need you getting too sweaty.

109
00:04:13,840 --> 00:04:15,306
We're gonna spend the rest of our lives

110
00:04:15,312 --> 00:04:16,845
looking at these wedding selfies.

111
00:04:41,778 --> 00:04:44,750
_

112
00:04:49,847 --> 00:04:51,112
Where are you going?

113
00:04:51,114 --> 00:04:53,315
I-I'm walking. It's faster.

114
00:04:54,751 --> 00:04:56,218
Hey, buddy,

115
00:04:56,220 --> 00:04:58,987
we got a slight bend in
the road coming up, okay?

116
00:04:58,989 --> 00:05:00,355
If you've developed core muscles,

117
00:05:00,357 --> 00:05:01,919
you're gonna want to engage them.

118
00:05:18,575 --> 00:05:21,109
What the hell are you
assholes doing here?

119
00:05:21,111 --> 00:05:23,178
Where's Eddie?

120
00:05:23,180 --> 00:05:25,209
Eddie? Bitch, I know a lot of Eddies.

121
00:05:25,215 --> 00:05:27,682
You gonna have to be
more specific than that.

122
00:05:33,573 --> 00:05:35,506
Come on, Tickles. Where's Eddie?

123
00:05:35,508 --> 00:05:37,475
Um, I don't go by that name anymore,

124
00:05:37,477 --> 00:05:39,701
and how the hell should
I know where Eddie is?

125
00:05:39,707 --> 00:05:41,540
Because you threatened him.

126
00:05:41,546 --> 00:05:43,713
- Said who?
- Said him.

127
00:05:43,719 --> 00:05:45,324
When Eddie lived in the mountains,

128
00:05:45,330 --> 00:05:47,933
I could always count on him
to cheer me up with a joke.

129
00:05:47,939 --> 00:05:49,487
And then the pirate says,

130
00:05:49,489 --> 00:05:51,889
"Arrgh. You're driving me nuts."

131
00:05:53,838 --> 00:05:56,306
Hi. I'm Tickles.

132
00:05:56,308 --> 00:05:58,875
A private dance at your table is $10,

133
00:05:58,877 --> 00:06:00,610
but if you want to order off the menu,

134
00:06:00,612 --> 00:06:02,845
I'll blow you in the supply closet.

135
00:06:02,847 --> 00:06:04,687
We also have mozzarella sticks.

136
00:06:04,693 --> 00:06:06,626
But after you guys moved to the beach,

137
00:06:06,632 --> 00:06:08,432
Eddie had to cheer me up over the phone.

138
00:06:08,438 --> 00:06:11,005
So, what did Cinderella say
when she got to the ball?

139
00:06:11,011 --> 00:06:12,351
What?

140
00:06:13,458 --> 00:06:15,329
Eddie!

141
00:06:15,337 --> 00:06:16,637
- I gotta go.
- Okay.

142
00:06:16,639 --> 00:06:17,905
No matter when I called,

143
00:06:17,907 --> 00:06:19,840
Eddie was always there for me.

144
00:06:19,842 --> 00:06:21,241
... Then the dad says,

145
00:06:21,243 --> 00:06:24,111
"We call ourselves the Aristocrats!"

146
00:06:25,781 --> 00:06:27,581
Okay, yeah. Well, I gotta go.

147
00:06:27,583 --> 00:06:29,016
But a few days ago,

148
00:06:29,018 --> 00:06:30,784
Eddie was the one who
needed cheering up.

149
00:06:30,786 --> 00:06:32,920
And I will stuff your
balls in your butt!

150
00:06:34,857 --> 00:06:36,190
Hey, man. Get this.

151
00:06:36,192 --> 00:06:37,724
Your stepmother just threatened

152
00:06:37,726 --> 00:06:39,159
to put my balls in my butt.

153
00:06:39,161 --> 00:06:40,661
Is that even possible?

154
00:06:40,663 --> 00:06:42,429
I don't know, but I
don't want to find out.

155
00:06:42,435 --> 00:06:43,697
I hear you.

156
00:06:43,768 --> 00:06:45,368
- Knock, knock.
- Who's there?

157
00:06:45,374 --> 00:06:46,640
Smell mop.

158
00:06:46,646 --> 00:06:47,734
Smell mop who?

159
00:06:47,736 --> 00:06:48,936
Uh, no thank you!

160
00:06:50,906 --> 00:06:52,906
This morning, I had
another one of my fish

161
00:06:52,908 --> 00:06:54,208
unexpectedly die on me,

162
00:06:54,210 --> 00:06:56,143
But when I called Eddie,
he didn't pick up.

163
00:06:56,145 --> 00:06:57,978
So, we decided to come
down here to the beach

164
00:06:57,980 --> 00:07:00,102
and make sure you hadn't
done nothin' to him.

165
00:07:00,108 --> 00:07:03,443
Did you stuff my nephew's
nuts in his pooper?

166
00:07:03,953 --> 00:07:06,520
I didn't touch anyone's nuts.

167
00:07:06,526 --> 00:07:07,926
We all know that's bullshit.

168
00:07:07,932 --> 00:07:10,757
Shut up! I have changed, okay?

169
00:07:10,759 --> 00:07:13,380
In fact, I have a boyfriend now

170
00:07:13,386 --> 00:07:15,963
who I haven't even had sex with yet,

171
00:07:15,965 --> 00:07:18,432
because he is waiting for the best time

172
00:07:18,434 --> 00:07:19,933
to make the first move.

173
00:07:19,935 --> 00:07:23,303
Speaking of which, I am late for a date.

174
00:07:23,305 --> 00:07:24,616
Now, hold on.

175
00:07:24,622 --> 00:07:25,955
The last thing Frank heard from Eddie

176
00:07:25,961 --> 00:07:27,193
was that you threatened him.

177
00:07:27,199 --> 00:07:28,876
What were the two of you arguing about?

178
00:07:28,878 --> 00:07:30,210
None of your business.

179
00:07:30,212 --> 00:07:31,912
And you can't just hold me hostage here.

180
00:07:31,914 --> 00:07:33,780
I told you she wasn't gonna say anything

181
00:07:33,782 --> 00:07:35,367
unless we torture her.

182
00:07:35,517 --> 00:07:38,118
- All we want is some answers.
- You want answers?

183
00:07:38,120 --> 00:07:40,287
Give me my pruning shears back.

184
00:07:40,289 --> 00:07:42,294
It's not happening.

185
00:07:42,300 --> 00:07:44,591
But I can't let you leave until
I get a written statement,

186
00:07:44,593 --> 00:07:46,012
telling me everything you've done

187
00:07:46,018 --> 00:07:47,647
since the last time you saw Eddie.

188
00:07:48,664 --> 00:07:49,963
This is bullshit!

189
00:07:49,965 --> 00:07:52,132
Eddie probably just got high

190
00:07:52,134 --> 00:07:54,134
and wandered off somewhere.

191
00:07:54,136 --> 00:07:57,237
He could be halfway around
the world for all we know.

192
00:08:13,977 --> 00:08:16,450
_

193
00:08:21,263 --> 00:08:22,829
Aah!

194
00:08:26,168 --> 00:08:27,831
Hello?

195
00:08:27,837 --> 00:08:29,170
You're not gonna believe this.

196
00:08:29,176 --> 00:08:31,071
My mother has the entire house wired

197
00:08:31,073 --> 00:08:33,740
- with hidden security cameras.
- What?

198
00:08:33,742 --> 00:08:35,842
She must know that I've been
renting the house off the books

199
00:08:35,844 --> 00:08:37,978
and she's just waiting
to rub my nose in it

200
00:08:37,980 --> 00:08:40,314
by watching these recordings
next time she visits.

201
00:08:40,316 --> 00:08:42,349
Wait, so everything at that house

202
00:08:42,351 --> 00:08:44,117
is being recorded?

203
00:08:44,119 --> 00:08:45,880
How long does the footage go back?

204
00:08:45,886 --> 00:08:47,052
I'm not sure.

205
00:08:47,058 --> 00:08:48,621
I'm just working my way
through right now,

206
00:08:48,627 --> 00:08:50,157
trying to delete
everybody who paid cash.

207
00:08:50,159 --> 00:08:51,626
But, given the size of this DVR,

208
00:08:51,632 --> 00:08:53,398
I mean, I think it goes back a long way.

209
00:08:53,404 --> 00:08:55,605
Oh, I'm gonna see if I
can find some footage

210
00:08:55,611 --> 00:08:58,012
of that crazy party those
guys threw a year ago,

211
00:08:58,014 --> 00:08:59,813
when some of the
knickknacks went missing.

212
00:08:59,815 --> 00:09:01,697
Maybe I can get a lead on where that

213
00:09:01,703 --> 00:09:03,637
cat driving a fish wandered off to.

214
00:09:03,961 --> 00:09:05,628
Anyway, see you soon.

215
00:09:19,944 --> 00:09:22,978
Hey, anybody want any oysters?

216
00:09:22,980 --> 00:09:25,981
There's a whole briefcase
full of them in the fridge.

217
00:09:25,983 --> 00:09:27,817
- No thanks.
- They look like snot.

218
00:09:27,819 --> 00:09:30,286
Suit yourself. More for me.

219
00:09:32,290 --> 00:09:34,223
Mmm.

220
00:09:47,887 --> 00:09:51,255
Look, I-I made a mistake, okay?

221
00:09:51,257 --> 00:09:54,392
I... I just was freaking out a little

222
00:09:54,394 --> 00:09:56,427
about life and getting older.

223
00:09:56,429 --> 00:09:58,673
So, I went to this party

224
00:09:58,679 --> 00:10:01,198
and I... took drugs, ugh!

225
00:10:01,204 --> 00:10:02,871
And I drank way too much.

226
00:10:02,877 --> 00:10:05,380
And, honestly, this thing
with Bodhi, it meant nothing.

227
00:10:05,386 --> 00:10:06,754
I don't even remember it.

228
00:10:06,756 --> 00:10:08,613
Really? You don't remember anything?

229
00:10:08,619 --> 00:10:10,658
No. That's why I didn't say anything.

230
00:10:10,660 --> 00:10:12,892
Well, allow me to remind you.

231
00:10:13,027 --> 00:10:15,696
'Cause the cameras were not
just in the living room.

232
00:10:19,902 --> 00:10:22,077
Tommy, please, I don't
want to watch this.

233
00:10:22,083 --> 00:10:23,736
I didn't want to watch
it, either, Nikki.

234
00:10:23,742 --> 00:10:24,975
But I did.

235
00:10:24,981 --> 00:10:26,914
Tommy, I love you so much.

236
00:10:26,920 --> 00:10:28,553
I'm so sorry.

237
00:10:28,570 --> 00:10:31,304
I just didn't want to hurt
you if I didn't have to.

238
00:10:31,306 --> 00:10:33,706
And I know how much
you love being a father,

239
00:10:33,708 --> 00:10:35,175
s-so I...

240
00:10:44,986 --> 00:10:46,853
Nothing happened.

241
00:10:48,986 --> 00:10:50,885
Nothing happened.

242
00:10:50,891 --> 00:10:52,391
Nothing happened?!

243
00:10:52,594 --> 00:10:55,974
Nikki, you slept this close
next to another naked dong.

244
00:10:55,980 --> 00:10:57,564
That hurts.

245
00:10:57,566 --> 00:10:59,632
We have a child together,
for crying out loud.

246
00:11:00,312 --> 00:11:01,868
Yes, we do.

247
00:11:01,870 --> 00:11:03,236
We have a child.

248
00:11:03,238 --> 00:11:05,939
Ours. Yours and mine.

249
00:11:05,941 --> 00:11:07,840
No doubt about it.

250
00:11:16,189 --> 00:11:18,189
I love you.

251
00:11:18,787 --> 00:11:20,687
And I want to marry you.

252
00:11:22,442 --> 00:11:24,742
Okay, wow.

253
00:11:24,926 --> 00:11:26,492
I love you, too.

254
00:11:26,702 --> 00:11:28,902
This is gonna sting for a little while.

255
00:11:29,348 --> 00:11:31,014
You know me, my heart bruises

256
00:11:31,020 --> 00:11:32,887
like a banana in a washing machine.

257
00:11:43,311 --> 00:11:46,072
Well, uh, I... I think
the worst is over.

258
00:11:46,414 --> 00:11:48,581
No, no, it's not over.

259
00:11:48,587 --> 00:11:49,864
- Hello?
- Oh!

260
00:11:49,870 --> 00:11:51,070
Hi.

261
00:11:51,076 --> 00:11:52,957
Um, I-I'm trying to reach my husband.

262
00:11:52,963 --> 00:11:54,383
He's one of the Doctors Without Borders

263
00:11:54,389 --> 00:11:55,455
and this is his phone.

264
00:11:55,457 --> 00:11:57,687
Do you speak any English?

265
00:11:57,693 --> 00:12:01,649
Is... Dr... Brown... there?

266
00:12:03,566 --> 00:12:05,188
No, that's a brown doctor.

267
00:12:05,194 --> 00:12:06,844
I'm looking for Dr. Brown.

268
00:12:06,850 --> 00:12:08,367
I need to ask him what to do

269
00:12:08,373 --> 00:12:10,173
if someone has food poisoning.

270
00:12:15,343 --> 00:12:17,210
How you doing, Vivian?

271
00:12:18,755 --> 00:12:20,154
Buddy.

272
00:12:20,160 --> 00:12:21,280
Thank God.

273
00:12:21,286 --> 00:12:22,382
How you doing?

274
00:12:22,384 --> 00:12:23,616
Why are you sweating?

275
00:12:23,618 --> 00:12:25,852
I'm fine. I was running
around looking for Vivian

276
00:12:25,854 --> 00:12:28,421
when I saw Officer Leahy's police
car parked across the street.

277
00:12:28,423 --> 00:12:29,656
Why were you looking for Vivian?

278
00:12:29,658 --> 00:12:31,124
Oh!

279
00:12:34,729 --> 00:12:38,464
Aw, shit. Look who's in charge now.

280
00:12:39,334 --> 00:12:40,433
Kimberly? You there?

281
00:12:40,814 --> 00:12:42,714
I don't think I can play S.

282
00:12:42,720 --> 00:12:45,321
There has been an Ebola outbreak.

283
00:12:54,202 --> 00:12:56,045
Mom, put the gun down.

284
00:12:56,051 --> 00:12:58,885
You're a lot of things,
but you're not a killer.

285
00:12:58,887 --> 00:13:00,961
Bullshit. She tried to kill me.

286
00:13:00,967 --> 00:13:02,500
Kill you?

287
00:13:02,506 --> 00:13:05,058
I drilled holes in the box, you asshole.

288
00:13:05,060 --> 00:13:08,928
You are supposed to be
safe and sound in Russia

289
00:13:08,930 --> 00:13:11,131
where you can't screw things up for me.

290
00:13:11,133 --> 00:13:13,605
This is why the post office

291
00:13:13,611 --> 00:13:15,468
deserves to go out of business.

292
00:13:15,470 --> 00:13:17,904
Kim, I can kind of hear
people, but I can't see.

293
00:13:17,906 --> 00:13:19,506
I think you might have left the TV on.

294
00:13:19,508 --> 00:13:20,949
If someone would have given

295
00:13:20,955 --> 00:13:22,442
me my pruning shears back,

296
00:13:22,444 --> 00:13:23,977
we wouldn't be in this situation.

297
00:13:23,979 --> 00:13:26,780
Everybody, just shut up so I can think!

298
00:13:29,669 --> 00:13:31,599
Was that a vagina?

299
00:13:36,058 --> 00:13:37,190
Eddie?

300
00:13:37,192 --> 00:13:38,725
What's going on?

301
00:13:38,727 --> 00:13:39,893
Nothing.

302
00:13:39,895 --> 00:13:42,606
Where is the baby?
Fell asleep in the van.

303
00:13:42,612 --> 00:13:44,264
What's wrong with that police woman?

304
00:13:44,266 --> 00:13:46,132
She's... drunk.

305
00:13:46,134 --> 00:13:47,500
She's not drunk.

306
00:13:47,502 --> 00:13:48,902
And Vivian's not who you think she is.

307
00:13:48,904 --> 00:13:50,437
Shut up! You don't say another word.

308
00:13:50,439 --> 00:13:52,105
Uh, that's definitely a vagina.

309
00:13:52,107 --> 00:13:53,206
Shut up!

310
00:13:55,010 --> 00:13:57,009
Take it easy, Tickles.

311
00:13:57,015 --> 00:13:58,314
Who's Tickles?!

312
00:13:58,346 --> 00:14:00,613
I'm Tickles! Okay?

313
00:14:00,619 --> 00:14:01,985
I'm Tickles.

314
00:14:03,285 --> 00:14:04,718
I thought I could move to the beach

315
00:14:04,720 --> 00:14:07,331
and reinvent myself,
but who am I kidding?

316
00:14:07,337 --> 00:14:09,189
But I wasn't always like this, Bodhi.

317
00:14:09,191 --> 00:14:10,557
I wasn't.

318
00:14:10,559 --> 00:14:13,026
I actually had all "B"s
and "C"s in high school

319
00:14:13,028 --> 00:14:14,828
before my best friend, Libby,
talked me into dropping out

320
00:14:14,830 --> 00:14:16,959
to follow Nickelback around the country.

321
00:14:16,965 --> 00:14:18,298
To make money,

322
00:14:18,300 --> 00:14:20,633
I would sew patches on people's
jeans in the parking lot

323
00:14:20,635 --> 00:14:22,569
while Libby blew guys in the
back of her PT Cruiser.

324
00:14:22,571 --> 00:14:25,238
And let's just say the
knob-gobbin' business

325
00:14:25,240 --> 00:14:28,308
turned out to be a lot more
lucrative than patches.

326
00:14:28,310 --> 00:14:29,909
And that's when I realized

327
00:14:29,911 --> 00:14:33,046
all people really want in life is sex.

328
00:14:33,048 --> 00:14:36,149
So, when Nickel B was
playing a show in NYC city,

329
00:14:36,151 --> 00:14:38,918
I popped into a strip club
on an open pole night.

330
00:14:38,920 --> 00:14:41,909
I made $47,

331
00:14:41,915 --> 00:14:43,323
and I never went back

332
00:14:43,325 --> 00:14:44,991
to sewing patches on jeans again.

333
00:14:46,142 --> 00:14:47,949
I was living the dream

334
00:14:48,330 --> 00:14:49,929
till the stock market crashed

335
00:14:49,931 --> 00:14:51,844
and guys weren't making it rain anymore.

336
00:14:51,850 --> 00:14:53,299
I was busting my hump

337
00:14:53,301 --> 00:14:54,701
just to squeeze out a drizzle.

338
00:14:54,703 --> 00:14:55,902
And that is not just a saying.

339
00:14:55,904 --> 00:14:57,303
I actually have a slight hump,

340
00:14:57,305 --> 00:14:58,571
and it got very damaged one night

341
00:14:58,573 --> 00:15:00,106
when I tried to do a back handspring

342
00:15:00,108 --> 00:15:01,174
during a Mötley Crüe song.

343
00:15:01,176 --> 00:15:02,931
So, I moved to the mountains

344
00:15:02,937 --> 00:15:04,411
where rent was cheap,

345
00:15:04,413 --> 00:15:05,812
and I decided to open my own club.

346
00:15:05,814 --> 00:15:08,047
But owning a business
just, like, turned out

347
00:15:08,049 --> 00:15:09,649
to be a lot harder than I thought.

348
00:15:09,651 --> 00:15:11,651
- Wilfrid?
- And before I knew it,

349
00:15:11,653 --> 00:15:14,254
I was jerking off guys
in the supply closet

350
00:15:14,256 --> 00:15:15,588
just to keep the lights on.

351
00:15:15,590 --> 00:15:17,090
And, Bodhi, you can look at me

352
00:15:17,092 --> 00:15:20,026
with that deer-in-the-headlights
judgement in your eyes

353
00:15:20,028 --> 00:15:21,161
all you want.

354
00:15:21,163 --> 00:15:22,562
It doesn't bother me.

355
00:15:22,564 --> 00:15:24,898
I see those same judging eyes

356
00:15:24,900 --> 00:15:27,400
every time I look in the mirror.

357
00:15:27,402 --> 00:15:28,668
I promise you,

358
00:15:28,670 --> 00:15:29,780
you can't hate me

359
00:15:29,786 --> 00:15:31,886
any more than I hate myself.

360
00:15:34,576 --> 00:15:35,842
Ohh!

361
00:15:35,844 --> 00:15:37,777
Aah!

362
00:15:37,779 --> 00:15:40,947
Oh, you gotta be shitting me!

363
00:15:43,764 --> 00:15:46,753
? That's the truth about the truth ?

364
00:15:46,755 --> 00:15:49,923
? It don't matter what you do ?

365
00:15:49,925 --> 00:15:51,891
? It's gonna bust on through ?

366
00:15:51,893 --> 00:15:54,961
? That's the truth about the truth ?

367
00:15:55,897 --> 00:15:58,731
? You can hide behind a lie ?

368
00:15:58,733 --> 00:16:01,134
? Put on some brand-new disguise ?

369
00:16:01,136 --> 00:16:03,870
? Before you crack,
you're cracking wise ?

370
00:16:03,872 --> 00:16:06,606
? And acting like you made it ?

371
00:16:07,915 --> 00:16:11,144
? But, honey, don't it eat at you? ?

372
00:16:11,146 --> 00:16:13,780
? Cut you up and make you stew ?

373
00:16:13,782 --> 00:16:15,815
? Think of what it puts you through ?

374
00:16:15,817 --> 00:16:19,185
- _
- ? Before it makes you jaded ?

375
00:16:19,187 --> 00:16:22,555
? That's the truth about the truth ?

376
00:16:22,557 --> 00:16:25,425
? It don't matter what you do ?

377
00:16:25,427 --> 00:16:27,260
? It's gonna bust on through ?

378
00:16:27,262 --> 00:16:29,996
? That's the truth about the truth ?

379
00:16:29,998 --> 00:16:33,967
? No one said it'd feel that great ?

380
00:16:33,969 --> 00:16:36,769
- _
- ? Bring you peace, make you a saint ?

381
00:16:36,771 --> 00:16:39,606
? All that mess that's on your plate ?

382
00:16:39,608 --> 00:16:42,242
? It ain't going nowhere ?

383
00:16:43,378 --> 00:16:46,179
? But there's some joy
that truth can bring ?

384
00:16:46,181 --> 00:16:48,915
? 'Cause lies, they ain't
a weightless thing ?

385
00:16:48,917 --> 00:16:51,684
? They pull you down,
they cut and sting ?

386
00:16:51,686 --> 00:16:54,754
? They leave you lost and lonely ?

387
00:16:54,756 --> 00:16:57,624
? That's the truth about the truth ?

388
00:16:57,626 --> 00:17:00,627
? It don't matter what you do ?

389
00:17:00,629 --> 00:17:02,929
? It's gonna bust on through ?

390
00:17:02,931 --> 00:17:06,165
? That's the truth about the truth ?

391
00:17:08,621 --> 00:17:09,703
Ahh.

392
00:17:09,709 --> 00:17:11,208
I'm gonna miss you, buddy.

393
00:17:11,214 --> 00:17:13,081
I'm gonna miss you, too.

394
00:17:13,087 --> 00:17:14,997
I hate to leave the
beach, but entering the

395
00:17:15,003 --> 00:17:16,776
corporate world has always been a dream.

396
00:17:16,778 --> 00:17:18,144
I can't believe someone wants me

397
00:17:18,146 --> 00:17:20,095
for their Assistant
Manager Trainee Program.

398
00:17:20,101 --> 00:17:21,247
I can.

399
00:17:21,249 --> 00:17:22,515
Ever since I saw you drop

400
00:17:22,517 --> 00:17:24,017
that whole bucket of chicken

401
00:17:24,019 --> 00:17:25,852
and take the time to pick out

402
00:17:25,854 --> 00:17:27,487
every single piece of gravel

403
00:17:27,489 --> 00:17:29,261
before you delivered it...

404
00:17:29,991 --> 00:17:32,425
... I knew you were
assistant manager material.

405
00:17:36,296 --> 00:17:37,795
Don't start.

406
00:17:37,801 --> 00:17:39,332
Don't you start.

407
00:17:40,575 --> 00:17:43,403
? Now you doubled up on it ?

408
00:17:43,405 --> 00:17:46,205
? Your trouble stacked
with your bullshit ?

409
00:17:46,207 --> 00:17:48,708
? Things got better for a bit ?

410
00:17:48,710 --> 00:17:51,945
? Now it's back to your old self ?

411
00:17:51,947 --> 00:17:55,048
? That's the truth about the truth ?

412
00:17:55,050 --> 00:17:57,984
? Don't matter what you do ?

413
00:17:57,986 --> 00:18:00,086
? It's gonna bust on through ?

414
00:18:00,088 --> 00:18:02,889
? That's the truth about the truth ?

415
00:18:02,891 --> 00:18:06,668
? That's the truth about the truth ?

416
00:18:21,543 --> 00:18:23,376
What are you doing here?

417
00:18:23,378 --> 00:18:24,644
I went to the prison,

418
00:18:24,646 --> 00:18:26,980
but the guard said
you were already gone.

419
00:18:26,982 --> 00:18:28,445
The guard said you mentioned

420
00:18:28,451 --> 00:18:30,116
heading back to the mountains,

421
00:18:30,118 --> 00:18:31,904
so I... I took a shot.

422
00:18:31,910 --> 00:18:33,019
Why?

423
00:18:33,021 --> 00:18:34,887
Why would you come all the way...

424
00:18:34,889 --> 00:18:36,390
I wanted to talk more about all that

425
00:18:36,396 --> 00:18:38,057
stuff you said before you got arrested

426
00:18:38,059 --> 00:18:39,425
and speared in the boob by that marlin.

427
00:18:39,427 --> 00:18:41,027
You know, all that stuff about

428
00:18:41,029 --> 00:18:42,356
working at a strip club

429
00:18:42,362 --> 00:18:44,259
and jerking off all those
guys in that storage room.

430
00:18:44,265 --> 00:18:45,751
Yeah, I get it. I'm a bad person.

431
00:18:45,757 --> 00:18:47,257
No, that's just it.

432
00:18:47,263 --> 00:18:48,929
I don't think you are.

433
00:18:48,935 --> 00:18:52,770
At least, I don't want
to believe you are.

434
00:18:52,843 --> 00:18:55,311
- I can't.
- What are you talking about?

435
00:18:55,317 --> 00:18:58,618
Look, when you revealed all
that stuff about yourself,

436
00:18:58,624 --> 00:18:59,846
I didn't know what to say,

437
00:18:59,848 --> 00:19:01,314
because it all sounded so familiar.

438
00:19:01,316 --> 00:19:03,916
I had all "C"s and "B"s
in community college

439
00:19:03,918 --> 00:19:06,452
when I saw Matthew
McConaughey in "Magic Mike,"

440
00:19:06,454 --> 00:19:08,421
and my world changed forever.

441
00:19:08,423 --> 00:19:10,757
I secretly started
working at a strip club

442
00:19:10,759 --> 00:19:12,872
where the club made the
guys dress as characters,

443
00:19:13,250 --> 00:19:15,777
like police man, fire man,

444
00:19:15,783 --> 00:19:18,444
trash man, sales man,

445
00:19:18,933 --> 00:19:21,394
medicine man, con man,

446
00:19:21,690 --> 00:19:24,586
handy man, milk man,

447
00:19:24,739 --> 00:19:27,970
space man, cave man.

448
00:19:27,976 --> 00:19:29,380
Basically, anything with

449
00:19:29,386 --> 00:19:30,843
"man" in it was recommended.

450
00:19:30,845 --> 00:19:32,629
I dressed up like a business man.

451
00:19:32,635 --> 00:19:34,047
Only, to make it sexy,

452
00:19:34,049 --> 00:19:36,049
I put my junk in a dress sock

453
00:19:36,051 --> 00:19:37,758
and I pulled it through
the fly in my pants

454
00:19:37,764 --> 00:19:40,689
so it would, you know,
flop around, you know?

455
00:19:40,969 --> 00:19:42,935
Touching was against the law,

456
00:19:43,024 --> 00:19:45,391
but as Matty Mack says in "Magic Mike,"

457
00:19:45,393 --> 00:19:48,561
"There's a lot of law
breakers out there."

458
00:19:48,563 --> 00:19:49,962
Then, one afternoon,

459
00:19:49,964 --> 00:19:52,799
I came home during my
mother's new book club

460
00:19:53,171 --> 00:19:55,189
to find myself face to face

461
00:19:55,195 --> 00:19:57,003
with a room full of 50-year-old women

462
00:19:57,005 --> 00:19:58,743
who had all had my cock-filled

463
00:19:58,749 --> 00:20:00,306
dress sock in their hand.

464
00:20:00,308 --> 00:20:02,215
In some cases, worse.

465
00:20:02,221 --> 00:20:03,744
I was horrified.

466
00:20:03,978 --> 00:20:05,845
I mean, every bad thing I had ever done

467
00:20:05,847 --> 00:20:07,313
was sitting in my living room,

468
00:20:07,315 --> 00:20:10,104
talking to my mother about Dean Koontz.

469
00:20:10,719 --> 00:20:12,385
So, I left town.

470
00:20:12,387 --> 00:20:15,354
And I went to the beach
to make a fresh start.

471
00:20:17,892 --> 00:20:22,299
Vivian, I never made
a move on you because...

472
00:20:23,394 --> 00:20:25,264
I don't make moves on anyone.

473
00:20:25,266 --> 00:20:26,766
I don't want to fall for someone

474
00:20:26,768 --> 00:20:28,134
and have to keep my past a secret,

475
00:20:28,136 --> 00:20:30,136
and I didn't think anyone would want me

476
00:20:30,138 --> 00:20:31,938
if they knew I was damaged goods.

477
00:20:32,426 --> 00:20:35,026
But if I can believe
that you're a good person

478
00:20:35,032 --> 00:20:38,244
and you just happened to do
some bad things, then...

479
00:20:38,250 --> 00:20:41,448
Maybe I can believe that about myself.

480
00:20:41,950 --> 00:20:44,089
And if I believe it, then

481
00:20:44,931 --> 00:20:47,186
maybe somebody else will, too.

482
00:20:48,973 --> 00:20:50,273
I believe it.

483
00:21:05,707 --> 00:21:09,175
So, where should we go?

484
00:21:09,177 --> 00:21:12,378
Anywhere we can make a fresh start.

485
00:21:14,340 --> 00:21:17,083
? Wherever we go ?

486
00:21:17,085 --> 00:21:20,052
? That's fine by me ?

487
00:21:20,054 --> 00:21:22,655
? We'll settle our bones ?

488
00:21:22,657 --> 00:21:24,229
? Eventually ?

489
00:21:24,235 --> 00:21:25,467
? Yeah, I need a break ?

490
00:21:25,473 --> 00:21:26,805
? I need a minute ?

491
00:21:26,811 --> 00:21:28,911
? Just give me one day ?

492
00:21:28,917 --> 00:21:30,259
All right, there you go.

493
00:21:30,265 --> 00:21:31,998
Unh-unh. He'll lose 'em.

494
00:21:32,000 --> 00:21:33,966
You're actually gonna
be our last renters.

495
00:21:33,968 --> 00:21:35,368
The house was my mother's
income property,

496
00:21:35,370 --> 00:21:36,836
but she passed away a few months ago

497
00:21:36,838 --> 00:21:39,014
- and left it to me in her will.
- Oh.

498
00:21:39,020 --> 00:21:40,553
I was actually third in position,

499
00:21:40,559 --> 00:21:42,271
behind her new boyfriend and her cat.

500
00:21:42,277 --> 00:21:44,076
But, luckily for me, they
were on the plane with her.

501
00:21:44,078 --> 00:21:46,212
So... anyway, enjoy.

502
00:21:47,961 --> 00:21:52,890
- Synced and corrected by medvidecek007 -
- www.addic7ed.com -

