1
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Previously on Young Sheldon...

2
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Paige?

3
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I'm so happy to see you.

4
00:00:05,054 --> 00:00:06,486
Are you happy to see me?

5
00:00:06,488 --> 00:00:08,406
Not immediately.

6
00:00:08,409 --> 00:00:10,756
I don't usually see young
people at my lectures.

7
00:00:10,759 --> 00:00:13,627
I enjoyed your paper on
accelerator mass spectrometry

8
00:00:13,629 --> 00:00:15,095
and wanted to find out more.

9
00:00:15,097 --> 00:00:17,698
- And you?
- I read this magazine.

10
00:00:17,700 --> 00:00:20,100
- Uh-huh.
- It has puzzles, too.

11
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Well, I think my parents
are getting a divorce.

12
00:00:22,242 --> 00:00:24,738
- Why?
- They fight all the time.

13
00:00:24,740 --> 00:00:27,674
- I guess I'm lucky.
- Why?

14
00:00:27,677 --> 00:00:30,601
I'm the glue that holds
our family together.

15
00:00:38,420 --> 00:00:41,164
What do you think of these?

16
00:00:41,167 --> 00:00:43,523
They're nice, but you're
already taller than John.

17
00:00:43,525 --> 00:00:44,858
Won't they make that worse?

18
00:00:44,860 --> 00:00:46,843
No, makes it better.

19
00:00:46,846 --> 00:00:48,594
He likes me to be dominating.

20
00:00:48,597 --> 00:00:50,597
I don't want to hear that.

21
00:00:50,599 --> 00:00:55,075
Sometimes he makes me wear these
when we're... messing around.

22
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I said I don't want to hear it.

23
00:00:57,239 --> 00:00:59,606
I wanted to say it.

24
00:00:59,608 --> 00:01:03,309
All right, I don't have the
Sperry loafers in your size,

25
00:01:03,312 --> 00:01:05,112
but I do have the Hush Puppies.

26
00:01:05,114 --> 00:01:07,481
I don't wear brown Hush
Puppies penny loafers,

27
00:01:07,483 --> 00:01:09,710
I wear brown Sperry penny loafers.

28
00:01:09,713 --> 00:01:11,884
- But they're exactly the same.
- Well, do they come

29
00:01:11,887 --> 00:01:13,687
in a box that says Sperry penny loafers?

30
00:01:13,689 --> 00:01:15,255
Because that one says Hush Puppies.

31
00:01:15,257 --> 00:01:16,929
Just try 'em on, honey.

32
00:01:16,932 --> 00:01:20,226
- What if I like them?
- Well, then we'll get them.

33
00:01:20,229 --> 00:01:22,562
All right, let's go over this again.

34
00:01:22,564 --> 00:01:24,863
I don't wear brown Hush
Puppies penny loafers,

35
00:01:24,866 --> 00:01:26,366
I wear brown Sperry...

36
00:01:26,369 --> 00:01:27,668
Would you give us a moment?

37
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Happily.

38
00:01:29,472 --> 00:01:31,528
When we get to the
Hello Kitty store today,

39
00:01:31,531 --> 00:01:33,540
remember I was the good child.

40
00:01:33,542 --> 00:01:35,108
Oh, hi, Mary.

41
00:01:35,110 --> 00:01:37,177
Linda. So good to see you.

42
00:01:37,179 --> 00:01:39,446
- Hi, Sheldon.
- Hello, Paige.

43
00:01:39,448 --> 00:01:41,386
- Hi, Missy.
- Hi!

44
00:01:41,389 --> 00:01:44,090
Look at these rain boots...
They have ducks on them.

45
00:01:44,093 --> 00:01:45,919
And the ducks are wearing boots.

46
00:01:45,921 --> 00:01:47,854
Those are so cute.

47
00:01:48,991 --> 00:01:50,992
- Well, what a nice coincidence.
- Yeah.

48
00:01:50,995 --> 00:01:52,092
Good to see you.

49
00:01:52,094 --> 00:01:53,293
Yeah. How are things?

50
00:01:53,295 --> 00:01:54,494
Well, at the moment,

51
00:01:54,496 --> 00:01:56,020
trying to get shoes for Sheldon,

52
00:01:56,023 --> 00:01:59,533
but they only have these,
not the ones he likes.

53
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Ah. You know, I think that brand
is the same kind Einstein wore.

54
00:02:05,040 --> 00:02:07,808
Well, I've never seen
a picture of his feet.

55
00:02:07,810 --> 00:02:10,510
And you're a grown-up,
so you wouldn't lie to me.

56
00:02:10,512 --> 00:02:14,047
I guess I have no choice
but to believe you.

57
00:02:14,049 --> 00:02:15,682
All right, I'll try them.

58
00:02:15,684 --> 00:02:18,367
Great!

59
00:02:18,370 --> 00:02:21,555
Hey, Mom, can Missy and I
go to the Hello Kitty store?

60
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Well, it's okay with me
if it's okay with Mary.

61
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It's okay, but you better
be on your best behavior.

62
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I will, I promise.

63
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Go ahead.

64
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Boy, you steal one pencil sharpener

65
00:02:32,003 --> 00:02:34,031
and you never hear the end of it.

66
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How do they feel?

67
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My brand loyalty is
being severely tested.

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- Synced and corrected by VitoSilans -
... www.Addic7ed.com ...

69
00:03:04,466 --> 00:03:07,968
Did you guys know Paige
speaks three languages?

70
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Really? That's impressive.

71
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You only speak one.

72
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Two. I'm learning
conversational Klingon.

73
00:03:16,011 --> 00:03:17,511
That's impressive, too.

74
00:03:19,548 --> 00:03:21,848
Hey, Mom, can Paige
sleep over this weekend?

75
00:03:21,850 --> 00:03:24,301
I guess, if her mother says okay.

76
00:03:24,304 --> 00:03:26,453
Wait, where is she going to sleep?

77
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In your bed. You can sleep on the couch.

78
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Absolutely not.

79
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I've already changed
my brand of loafers,

80
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I am not changing my sleeping quarters.

81
00:03:34,863 --> 00:03:37,097
How about you stay at
Meemaw's? You like that.

82
00:03:37,099 --> 00:03:39,015
No, Meemaw has a date.

83
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So?

84
00:03:40,135 --> 00:03:41,701
So if those shoes I just bought

85
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do their job,

86
00:03:42,721 --> 00:03:44,938
that will be a "no
children allowed" scenario.

87
00:03:46,191 --> 00:03:49,325
Well, I'm sleeping in
my bed, and that's that.

88
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Fine, Paige and I can share my bed.

89
00:03:51,547 --> 00:03:53,213
You okay with that, Shelly?

90
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I trust you two will stay
quiet throughout the evening

91
00:03:57,119 --> 00:03:58,952
and go to sleep at the appropriate time?

92
00:03:58,954 --> 00:04:01,488
Absolutely.

93
00:04:01,490 --> 00:04:04,224
All right, then. I'm okay with it, Mom.

94
00:04:04,227 --> 00:04:07,962
How is he ever gonna
get through this world?

95
00:04:11,015 --> 00:04:13,133
Welcome, come on in.

96
00:04:13,135 --> 00:04:14,937
Oh, thank you.

97
00:04:14,940 --> 00:04:17,704
You look nice. Going out
to dinner with your husband?

98
00:04:17,706 --> 00:04:19,382
Ugh, no. Girlfriends.

99
00:04:19,385 --> 00:04:20,807
Hi, Sheldon.

100
00:04:20,809 --> 00:04:22,242
Hello.

101
00:04:22,244 --> 00:04:23,343
What are you doing?

102
00:04:23,345 --> 00:04:25,312
Chemistry homework for extra credit.

103
00:04:25,314 --> 00:04:27,147
Cute, I did that last year.

104
00:04:27,149 --> 00:04:28,882
Paige!

105
00:04:28,884 --> 00:04:30,817
Missy!

106
00:04:30,819 --> 00:04:33,053
Aw, they're so sweet.

107
00:04:33,055 --> 00:04:36,690
Yeah, life'll suck that
right out of them soon enough.

108
00:04:36,692 --> 00:04:38,356
- Well, bye.
- Bye.

109
00:04:38,359 --> 00:04:41,403
You got to meet my dolls...
I told them all about you!

110
00:04:44,166 --> 00:04:47,507
"Cute, I did that last year."

111
00:04:47,510 --> 00:04:49,836
Thank you for agreeing
to the early-bird dinner.

112
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When I eat too late, the
food just sits right here.

113
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Yeah, gettin' old is no party.

114
00:04:56,478 --> 00:04:59,679
Oh, I've had this
problem since I was ten.

115
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When I was in grade school,
my nickname was Old Burpy.

116
00:05:04,653 --> 00:05:07,287
Well, I will not be calling you that.

117
00:05:07,289 --> 00:05:08,655
You can if you'd like.

118
00:05:08,657 --> 00:05:10,123
I'm good.

119
00:05:10,125 --> 00:05:12,859
So, I have a little surprise for you.

120
00:05:12,861 --> 00:05:15,028
Oh, I love surprises. Whatcha got?

121
00:05:15,030 --> 00:05:16,863
I'm going to learn to drive.

122
00:05:16,865 --> 00:05:18,468
Really?

123
00:05:18,471 --> 00:05:19,799
Yes.

124
00:05:19,801 --> 00:05:23,436
While I love having you
be the dominant personality

125
00:05:23,438 --> 00:05:26,806
behind closed doors,
I think out in public

126
00:05:26,808 --> 00:05:29,368
I ought to take on more of a macho role.

127
00:05:30,500 --> 00:05:33,146
Well, you're macho enough for me, John,

128
00:05:33,148 --> 00:05:36,516
but I would enjoy not having
to drive us all the time.

129
00:05:36,518 --> 00:05:37,751
Then it's settled.

130
00:05:37,753 --> 00:05:39,419
Well, when do you start?

131
00:05:39,421 --> 00:05:41,154
As soon as you teach me.

132
00:05:41,156 --> 00:05:45,158
Me? Do you really think
that's a good idea?

133
00:05:45,160 --> 00:05:48,528
It's perfect. I teach you about science

134
00:05:48,530 --> 00:05:50,196
so you can impress your grandson,

135
00:05:50,198 --> 00:05:54,234
and you teach me to drive
so I can impress you.

136
00:05:54,236 --> 00:05:59,051
Okay, but if we do this, I'm in charge.

137
00:05:59,054 --> 00:06:03,810
You have to do what I say when
and how I tell you to do it.

138
00:06:03,812 --> 00:06:07,681
Hubba-hubba, it's like
we're back in the bedroom.

139
00:06:09,351 --> 00:06:12,886
Did you know that tea was
discovered by accident?

140
00:06:12,888 --> 00:06:15,522
I didn't, but I don't
know lots of stuff.

141
00:06:15,524 --> 00:06:18,405
The Emperor Shennong of China
was boiling water in his garden

142
00:06:18,408 --> 00:06:20,942
and a leaf from a tea
tree fell into his pot.

143
00:06:20,945 --> 00:06:23,063
Tea comes from trees?

144
00:06:23,065 --> 00:06:25,365
Where'd you think it comes from?

145
00:06:25,367 --> 00:06:27,067
The supermarket.

146
00:06:28,437 --> 00:06:31,471
What, the girls leave you
out of their little picnic?

147
00:06:31,473 --> 00:06:33,006
Oh, they invited him.

148
00:06:33,008 --> 00:06:34,512
Well, then why ain't you out there?

149
00:06:34,515 --> 00:06:37,544
Eat outdoors? Do I look
like a hippie to you?

150
00:06:37,546 --> 00:06:39,379
I thought Paige was your friend.

151
00:06:39,381 --> 00:06:41,114
She's more of a colleague.

152
00:06:41,116 --> 00:06:42,182
Oh.

153
00:06:42,184 --> 00:06:43,583
Although for reasons unknown,

154
00:06:43,585 --> 00:06:45,819
she's currently behaving
like a ten-year-old.

155
00:06:45,821 --> 00:06:48,121
Maybe that's because
she is a ten-year-old.

156
00:06:48,123 --> 00:06:49,531
Still no excuse.

157
00:06:51,492 --> 00:06:53,425
All right, I'm just
gonna come out and ask it:

158
00:06:53,428 --> 00:06:55,218
what the heck is a colleague?

159
00:07:00,671 --> 00:07:02,350
Okay, pick a number.

160
00:07:02,352 --> 00:07:03,451
Three.

161
00:07:03,453 --> 00:07:05,319
One, two, three.

162
00:07:05,321 --> 00:07:06,787
Now pick a color.

163
00:07:06,789 --> 00:07:08,155
Pink, duh.

164
00:07:08,157 --> 00:07:12,718
The name of your future pony is...

165
00:07:12,721 --> 00:07:14,829
Sparkle Sunshine.

166
00:07:14,831 --> 00:07:17,097
I would totally name it that!

167
00:07:17,100 --> 00:07:19,800
Sheldon, do you want to
have your fortune read?

168
00:07:19,802 --> 00:07:21,669
Absolutely not.

169
00:07:21,671 --> 00:07:24,705
And I cannot believe a person
as smart as you is doing it.

170
00:07:24,707 --> 00:07:26,807
Why? It's fun.

171
00:07:26,809 --> 00:07:30,211
He doesn't know how to
have fun; he's an old man.

172
00:07:30,213 --> 00:07:31,646
I'm not an old man.

173
00:07:31,648 --> 00:07:33,814
Oh, yeah? What's your favorite color?

174
00:07:33,816 --> 00:07:35,182
Khaki.

175
00:07:35,184 --> 00:07:37,285
Old man.

176
00:07:45,144 --> 00:07:47,191
I'm trying to sleep.

177
00:07:47,194 --> 00:07:49,261
Come inside and play with us.

178
00:07:49,264 --> 00:07:50,409
Don't invite him.

179
00:07:50,412 --> 00:07:51,730
This is a girls fort,

180
00:07:51,733 --> 00:07:53,148
not an old man fort.

181
00:07:53,151 --> 00:07:55,062
I'm not an old man.

182
00:07:55,065 --> 00:07:56,664
Then come inside.

183
00:07:56,667 --> 00:07:58,673
Are you crazy? It's bedtime.

184
00:07:58,675 --> 00:08:01,575
Old man.

185
00:08:20,863 --> 00:08:22,763
What are you doing?

186
00:08:22,765 --> 00:08:25,074
We're tying Georgie's ankles together.

187
00:08:25,077 --> 00:08:27,868
So when he gets out
of bed he falls down.

188
00:08:27,870 --> 00:08:29,403
But he could get hurt.

189
00:08:29,405 --> 00:08:31,038
If we're lucky.

190
00:08:31,040 --> 00:08:33,341
Well, I will not be a party to this.

191
00:08:33,343 --> 00:08:35,042
Old man.

192
00:08:38,880 --> 00:08:42,515
That's when the bloodthirsty Goatman...

193
00:08:42,518 --> 00:08:44,752
Part goat, part man...

194
00:08:44,754 --> 00:08:49,223
- Crept up on the sleeping children...
- No.

195
00:08:49,225 --> 00:08:53,031
...and sank his sharp little
teeth into their necks...

196
00:08:53,032 --> 00:08:54,001
No.

197
00:08:54,004 --> 00:08:56,163
...and drank their blood!

198
00:08:56,165 --> 00:08:57,732
No.

199
00:08:57,734 --> 00:08:59,176
Problem?

200
00:08:59,179 --> 00:09:01,559
Several. First of all,
goats are herbivores.

201
00:09:01,562 --> 00:09:03,904
They don't eat meat,
let alone drink blood.

202
00:09:03,906 --> 00:09:06,073
Maybe the half man part drinks blood.

203
00:09:06,075 --> 00:09:09,310
Don't even get me started
on the "half man" stuff.

204
00:09:09,312 --> 00:09:12,621
Sheldon, it's just a fun scary story.

205
00:09:12,624 --> 00:09:14,648
It's nonsense is what it is.

206
00:09:14,650 --> 00:09:15,916
Old man.

207
00:09:15,918 --> 00:09:17,718
I'm not an old man, I'm ten.

208
00:09:17,720 --> 00:09:19,387
More like 110.

209
00:09:19,389 --> 00:09:22,757
You know, I read that adults
who had a stunted childhood

210
00:09:22,759 --> 00:09:25,359
often become social misfits and weirdos.

211
00:09:25,361 --> 00:09:27,294
You didn't read that,
you're making it up

212
00:09:27,296 --> 00:09:28,662
like your goat story.

213
00:09:28,664 --> 00:09:32,967
Psychology Magazine,
February issue, 1988.

214
00:09:32,969 --> 00:09:34,335
Well, um...

215
00:09:34,337 --> 00:09:36,837
That doesn't make it true.

216
00:09:36,839 --> 00:09:38,606
Guess you'll find out
when you're an adult.

217
00:09:38,608 --> 00:09:40,474
I guess I will.

218
00:09:42,845 --> 00:09:45,846
Well, we know how this story ends.

219
00:09:45,848 --> 00:09:47,801
I grew up to become a well-adjusted

220
00:09:47,804 --> 00:09:50,017
and charming fellow. But
at that moment in time,

221
00:09:50,019 --> 00:09:51,352
she had me worried.

222
00:09:51,354 --> 00:09:55,923
Hey, Georgie, breakfast. Mom made Eggos.

223
00:09:55,925 --> 00:09:57,992
Eggos, sweet.

224
00:09:57,994 --> 00:10:00,194
Ow! Dang it!

225
00:10:06,727 --> 00:10:07,947
Oh, dear.

226
00:10:07,950 --> 00:10:08,982
What?

227
00:10:08,985 --> 00:10:10,625
Paige was right.

228
00:10:10,627 --> 00:10:12,627
"There's ample evidence to indicate

229
00:10:12,629 --> 00:10:15,764
that a stunted childhood can
cause one to be maladjusted

230
00:10:15,766 --> 00:10:16,932
as an adult."

231
00:10:16,934 --> 00:10:18,233
Then I'm screwed.

232
00:10:18,235 --> 00:10:19,935
What do you mean?

233
00:10:19,937 --> 00:10:22,537
When I'm not in school,
I'm doing homework.

234
00:10:22,539 --> 00:10:25,273
When I'm not doing homework,
I'm practicing my cello.

235
00:10:25,275 --> 00:10:26,808
And when I'm not doing that,

236
00:10:26,810 --> 00:10:28,543
I'm working in my parents' store.

237
00:10:28,545 --> 00:10:31,046
That must be why we're friends.

238
00:10:31,048 --> 00:10:32,347
We're both stunted.

239
00:10:32,349 --> 00:10:33,782
Sounds right.

240
00:10:33,784 --> 00:10:36,751
Well, I for one plan to
do something about it.

241
00:10:36,753 --> 00:10:38,587
Like what?

242
00:10:38,589 --> 00:10:41,590
I'm going to goof off,
engage in horseplay,

243
00:10:41,592 --> 00:10:43,825
and if time permits, be quite immature.

244
00:10:43,827 --> 00:10:45,260
If time permits?

245
00:10:45,262 --> 00:10:47,180
I have homework, too.

246
00:10:47,183 --> 00:10:49,631
Would you like to join
me in my shenanigans?

247
00:10:49,633 --> 00:10:50,966
No, thanks.

248
00:10:50,968 --> 00:10:54,469
Aren't you concerned about
being a maladjusted adult?

249
00:10:54,471 --> 00:10:57,146
Nah. I'll just marry an American woman

250
00:10:57,149 --> 00:10:59,374
and hope she can fix me.

251
00:11:00,744 --> 00:11:02,662
DEPARTMENT OF MOTOR VEHICLES
STATE OF TEXAS

252
00:11:04,781 --> 00:11:07,115
I'm usually the one giving the tests,

253
00:11:07,117 --> 00:11:10,285
but, uh, today I'm taking one.

254
00:11:10,287 --> 00:11:11,620
No talking.

255
00:11:11,622 --> 00:11:15,991
And I usually say that to my students.

256
00:11:20,264 --> 00:11:21,296
What?

257
00:11:21,298 --> 00:11:23,365
How's it going?

258
00:11:23,367 --> 00:11:26,401
I can't tell you. There's no talking.

259
00:11:26,403 --> 00:11:28,970
- No talking.
- Sorry.

260
00:11:37,047 --> 00:11:38,280
Mind if I join you?

261
00:11:38,282 --> 00:11:39,314
Doing what?

262
00:11:39,316 --> 00:11:41,650
- Swinging.
- Seriously?

263
00:11:41,652 --> 00:11:44,452
Yes. It's my hope to
feel the wind in my hair

264
00:11:44,454 --> 00:11:46,930
- and be carefree.
- Um, okay.

265
00:12:01,104 --> 00:12:03,939
Sheldon threw up on me.
Sheldon threw up on me!

266
00:12:05,742 --> 00:12:09,144
Okay, rearview mirrors.

267
00:12:09,146 --> 00:12:11,479
Um, all set.

268
00:12:11,481 --> 00:12:15,183
Turn signal left. Turn signal right.

269
00:12:15,185 --> 00:12:17,919
Um, foot on the brake.

270
00:12:17,921 --> 00:12:21,389
Transmission in drive.

271
00:12:25,661 --> 00:12:28,228
You have to start the car first.

272
00:12:28,231 --> 00:12:30,365
Of course.

273
00:12:30,367 --> 00:12:31,833
Sorry, I'm a bit nervous.

274
00:12:31,835 --> 00:12:33,568
You're not alone.

275
00:12:36,306 --> 00:12:39,107
And here we go.

276
00:12:44,715 --> 00:12:47,382
This is crazy.

277
00:12:47,384 --> 00:12:48,917
I'm doing it.

278
00:13:00,297 --> 00:13:02,664
Excuse me, I was hoping to purchase

279
00:13:02,666 --> 00:13:04,699
some practical joke paraphernalia

280
00:13:04,701 --> 00:13:06,701
so that I may behave childishly.

281
00:13:06,703 --> 00:13:08,103
Rack in the corner.

282
00:13:08,105 --> 00:13:09,371
Thank you.

283
00:13:20,592 --> 00:13:23,845
BAZINGA. NOVELTY COMPANY
"IF IT'S FUNNY, IT'S A BAZINGA"

284
00:13:23,887 --> 00:13:27,722
"If it's funny, it's a Bazinga."

285
00:13:27,724 --> 00:13:28,990
Interesting.

286
00:13:35,732 --> 00:13:37,799
Yellow light. Yellow light!

287
00:13:37,801 --> 00:13:39,134
It's okay, keep going.

288
00:13:39,136 --> 00:13:40,635
But yellow means slow down.

289
00:13:40,637 --> 00:13:42,255
You can't slow down in the intersection!

290
00:13:42,258 --> 00:13:43,405
Keep going.

291
00:13:43,407 --> 00:13:45,006
- Are you sure?
- Yes.

292
00:13:45,008 --> 00:13:46,107
Go. Go!

293
00:13:55,318 --> 00:13:59,054
Oh, God. Oh, God.

294
00:13:59,056 --> 00:14:00,555
Oh...

295
00:14:00,557 --> 00:14:01,923
I'm so sorry.

296
00:14:01,925 --> 00:14:03,892
It's okay, we're fine.

297
00:14:03,894 --> 00:14:05,493
Nobody got hurt.

298
00:14:05,495 --> 00:14:07,328
I don't think I can do this, Connie.

299
00:14:07,330 --> 00:14:09,597
Of course you can. We're
just getting started.

300
00:14:09,599 --> 00:14:12,834
No, it's too much information.
I can't process it.

301
00:14:12,836 --> 00:14:14,803
It was just a yellow light.

302
00:14:14,805 --> 00:14:18,006
Not just the light.
There were other cars.

303
00:14:18,008 --> 00:14:19,174
There's pedestrians.

304
00:14:19,176 --> 00:14:21,709
- There was a guy on a bicycle.
- So?

305
00:14:21,711 --> 00:14:23,545
That's just too many random elements.

306
00:14:23,547 --> 00:14:26,181
The-the-the stimuli are overwhelming.

307
00:14:26,184 --> 00:14:28,951
Okay. Okay.

308
00:14:31,922 --> 00:14:34,322
I'm sorry. I know I'm letting you down.

309
00:14:34,324 --> 00:14:37,225
Oh, don't be silly.
You're not letting me down.

310
00:14:39,096 --> 00:14:42,163
I love you whether you can drive or not.

311
00:14:43,967 --> 00:14:45,767
You love me?

312
00:14:48,204 --> 00:14:51,872
Well, I...

313
00:14:51,875 --> 00:14:53,875
I suppose I do.

314
00:14:53,877 --> 00:14:58,713
Am I allowed to reciprocate?

315
00:14:58,715 --> 00:15:02,217
Sure, if that's the way you feel.

316
00:15:02,219 --> 00:15:04,219
Oh, it is.

317
00:15:04,221 --> 00:15:06,554
I love you, too, Connie.

318
00:15:06,556 --> 00:15:09,430
Well...

319
00:15:12,394 --> 00:15:14,161
That's just great.

320
00:15:14,164 --> 00:15:16,798
All righty.

321
00:15:18,502 --> 00:15:20,435
Would you like to switch seats with me?

322
00:15:20,437 --> 00:15:23,004
Yes, but give me a minute

323
00:15:23,006 --> 00:15:25,840
because my legs are a little wobbly.

324
00:15:25,842 --> 00:15:28,877
Is that from the yellow
light or the "I love yous"?

325
00:15:28,879 --> 00:15:30,178
Both.

326
00:15:34,084 --> 00:15:37,118
Dad, would you care for a piece of gum?

327
00:15:37,120 --> 00:15:38,553
No, thank you.

328
00:15:38,555 --> 00:15:40,288
Please, take a piece of gum.

329
00:15:40,290 --> 00:15:41,589
Why?

330
00:15:41,591 --> 00:15:42,857
Just please.

331
00:15:46,596 --> 00:15:47,929
Bazinga.

332
00:15:49,711 --> 00:15:51,266
You understand any of that?

333
00:15:51,268 --> 00:15:53,935
I don't know, I guess he's
just being a little boy.

334
00:15:53,937 --> 00:15:55,703
Since when?

335
00:15:55,705 --> 00:15:58,740
Georgie? Georgie?

336
00:15:58,742 --> 00:15:59,941
What?

337
00:15:59,943 --> 00:16:04,180
Would you like some salted mixed nuts?

338
00:16:04,183 --> 00:16:05,279
Nah.

339
00:16:05,282 --> 00:16:07,048
Look, they're the fancy kind.

340
00:16:07,050 --> 00:16:08,583
That's a trick can.

341
00:16:08,585 --> 00:16:10,118
No, it's not.

342
00:16:10,120 --> 00:16:12,253
Listen. When you shake it,
there's a rattling sound,

343
00:16:12,255 --> 00:16:13,788
as if nuts are inside.

344
00:16:14,991 --> 00:16:18,126
Fine.

345
00:16:21,331 --> 00:16:24,098
Bazinga.

346
00:16:25,969 --> 00:16:28,336
Sparks residence, Billy speaking.

347
00:16:28,338 --> 00:16:29,951
This is the electric company.

348
00:16:29,954 --> 00:16:31,060
Hello.

349
00:16:31,063 --> 00:16:33,575
I'm calling to see if your
refrigerator is running.

350
00:16:33,578 --> 00:16:36,078
I'll go check.

351
00:16:39,382 --> 00:16:41,082
I'm back. It's running.

352
00:16:41,084 --> 00:16:43,044
Well, then you better go catch it.

353
00:16:43,047 --> 00:16:45,954
Bazinga.

354
00:16:47,724 --> 00:16:49,568
This is Connie Tucker.

355
00:16:49,571 --> 00:16:52,227
Leave a message when
you hear the... beep.

356
00:16:53,930 --> 00:16:56,664
Hello, um, Meemaw,

357
00:16:56,666 --> 00:16:58,166
this is Sheldon.

358
00:16:58,168 --> 00:17:02,737
If you were home, I was going
to say, "Is Mr. Wall there?"

359
00:17:02,739 --> 00:17:04,172
And then you would say, "No."

360
00:17:04,174 --> 00:17:07,175
And then I would say,
"Is Mrs. Wall there?"

361
00:17:07,177 --> 00:17:08,743
And then you would say, "No."

362
00:17:08,745 --> 00:17:11,333
And then I would say,
"Well, if there are no walls,

363
00:17:11,336 --> 00:17:14,282
then how does your roof stay up?"

364
00:17:14,284 --> 00:17:17,385
Um, okay. Bazinga.

365
00:17:17,387 --> 00:17:20,822
That was pathetic.

366
00:17:20,824 --> 00:17:22,790
It was.

367
00:17:22,792 --> 00:17:26,461
I'm not sure I'm cut out for
these antics and shenanigans.

368
00:17:26,463 --> 00:17:28,896
I guess you're gonna
grow up to be a weirdo.

369
00:17:28,898 --> 00:17:31,199
I suppose I am.

370
00:17:31,201 --> 00:17:33,534
Life is so confusing.

371
00:17:33,536 --> 00:17:36,537
I always hoped it would be easier for me

372
00:17:36,539 --> 00:17:37,939
when I grew up, but...

373
00:17:39,241 --> 00:17:42,242
...now I'm not so sure it will.

374
00:17:42,245 --> 00:17:44,545
It's gonna be all right.

375
00:17:51,855 --> 00:17:53,087
You were faking?

376
00:17:55,524 --> 00:17:57,563
Bazinga.

377
00:17:57,566 --> 00:17:59,365
And that's how I became

378
00:17:59,368 --> 00:18:02,704
the madcap prankster all
my friends know and love.

379
00:18:06,836 --> 00:18:10,070
So, John, how was your
first driving lesson?

380
00:18:10,073 --> 00:18:12,040
Intense.

381
00:18:12,042 --> 00:18:13,274
At one point,

382
00:18:13,276 --> 00:18:15,410
I was approaching an intersection.

383
00:18:15,412 --> 00:18:18,213
The light was green,
but at the last moment,

384
00:18:18,216 --> 00:18:19,715
it turned yellow.

385
00:18:19,718 --> 00:18:20,951
I didn't know what to do.

386
00:18:20,954 --> 00:18:23,518
Should I keep going? Should I stop?

387
00:18:23,520 --> 00:18:25,687
There were other cars nearby.

388
00:18:25,689 --> 00:18:26,955
Connie was yelling.

389
00:18:26,957 --> 00:18:29,560
A glare from the sun was in my eyes.

390
00:18:29,563 --> 00:18:30,792
So, what happened?

391
00:18:30,794 --> 00:18:32,927
Somehow, I managed to make it through,

392
00:18:32,929 --> 00:18:34,794
turned on my directional,

393
00:18:34,797 --> 00:18:36,576
and slowly pulled

394
00:18:36,579 --> 00:18:38,533
to the side of the road.

395
00:18:38,535 --> 00:18:42,303
That's how you tell a scary story.

396
00:18:43,586 --> 00:18:46,374
In lighter news, your meemaw loves me.

397
00:18:51,375 --> 00:18:56,051
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