1
00:00:00,001 --> 00:00:07,871
credits

2
00:00:11,194 --> 00:00:13,596
Yeeeah! You got it, Ned!

3
00:00:13,756 --> 00:00:15,625
That was a nice shot!

4
00:00:15,650 --> 00:00:17,814
Thanks. I thought so, too.

5
00:00:17,839 --> 00:00:20,166
Come on, let's see what we got.

6
00:00:20,917 --> 00:00:23,086
Looks like you shot the shit out of it.

7
00:00:23,111 --> 00:00:24,631
There's nothin' left.

8
00:00:25,508 --> 00:00:27,410
Hey. Lookie here.

9
00:00:27,761 --> 00:00:30,964
Jesus. You ever seen
animal tracks that big?

10
00:00:30,998 --> 00:00:33,854
No, I have not, Jimbo.

11
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Looks like a bear. A huge one!

12
00:00:37,407 --> 00:00:39,509
Come on, the tracks go this way.

13
00:00:41,208 --> 00:00:44,032
Look at that. Looks like bear droppings.

14
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But with a man poop right next to it.

15
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I'm scared.

16
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What the hell are we dealing with, Ned?

17
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Whatever it is, it was here recently.

18
00:00:56,118 --> 00:00:57,219
Hey!

19
00:00:57,538 --> 00:01:00,121
What the hell are you
guys doing on my farm?

20
00:01:00,369 --> 00:01:02,838
We're trackin' a bear, Randy.

21
00:01:02,910 --> 00:01:03,910
A bear?

22
00:01:06,366 --> 00:01:08,836
That didn't sound like no bear.

23
00:01:09,069 --> 00:01:10,725
Where you goin', Ned?

24
00:01:10,750 --> 00:01:13,609
I'm getting my white ass outta here.

25
00:01:17,934 --> 00:01:19,759
What the fuck?!

26
00:01:19,784 --> 00:01:21,052
Jesus Christ!

27
00:01:22,049 --> 00:01:23,517
Ahghgghghgh!

28
00:01:25,385 --> 00:01:28,475
Helllllllp meeeeee!

29
00:01:34,676 --> 00:01:36,406
Neddddddd!

30
00:01:39,118 --> 00:01:42,094
All right, we have some dead
cows down at Milner's Ranch.

31
00:01:42,119 --> 00:01:44,382
I want Conners and Tiggs
to check that out.

32
00:01:44,407 --> 00:01:46,117
And the two hikers are still missing.

33
00:01:46,142 --> 00:01:48,284
Let's have all units keep
their ears to the ground.

34
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All right, ladies, that's it.
Second shift starts now.

35
00:01:50,905 --> 00:01:53,275
As for me, I'm finally heading home.

36
00:01:53,404 --> 00:01:55,406
Gonna finally get some R&R, sir?

37
00:01:55,431 --> 00:01:58,665
Yup. Gonna go home and play me
some "Red Dead Redemption 2."

38
00:01:58,690 --> 00:02:00,725
I got a train to rob in Valentine.

39
00:02:00,750 --> 00:02:01,984
Detective?!

40
00:02:02,081 --> 00:02:03,582
Got a call from the school.

41
00:02:03,607 --> 00:02:05,042
Another kid's been killed.

42
00:02:05,067 --> 00:02:07,367
No, no, not another school shooting.

43
00:02:07,392 --> 00:02:08,979
Can't they handle it themselves?

44
00:02:09,004 --> 00:02:10,706
Said they need us right away.

45
00:02:10,964 --> 00:02:12,577
God damn it.

46
00:02:12,602 --> 00:02:15,883
Why the hell can't these kids
stop being a pain in my ass?

47
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Children, everyone
just stay back, okay?

48
00:02:23,519 --> 00:02:24,920
The police are coming.

49
00:02:25,078 --> 00:02:27,483
All right, what happened? What
grade was the shooter in?

50
00:02:27,508 --> 00:02:28,543
Thank God.

51
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Some kindergartners found the body.

52
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I-I don't think it was a shooting.

53
00:02:31,900 --> 00:02:33,287
Of course it's a school shooting.

54
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It's cut and dry.

55
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Let's just get this over
with so I can go home.

56
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Where's the victim?

57
00:02:37,157 --> 00:02:38,210
Over there.

58
00:02:39,963 --> 00:02:41,231
What the hell?

59
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Jesus, it's a complete mauling.

60
00:02:44,756 --> 00:02:47,723
Looks like part of him was eaten.

61
00:02:47,757 --> 00:02:50,339
All right, which one of you
little shitheads did this?

62
00:02:50,833 --> 00:02:54,312
Come on! I don't have time
for these little games.

63
00:02:54,408 --> 00:02:56,087
Which one of you peckers felt isolated

64
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and lashed out at society?

65
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If I have to stay here
and do an investigation

66
00:03:00,480 --> 00:03:02,052
instead of go home and rob a train,

67
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there's gonna be serious hell to pay!

68
00:03:06,376 --> 00:03:08,244
So, what was he doing
alone on the playground?

69
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Staci Nakabe says he just
wanted to run back out

70
00:03:10,310 --> 00:03:11,079
and get his football.

71
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Mrph rmhmhm rm!

72
00:03:12,810 --> 00:03:14,445
And there were bear prints in the snow?

73
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It wasn't a bear.

74
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I saw it.

75
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You saw what?

76
00:03:21,235 --> 00:03:22,970
It was at my house.

77
00:03:23,003 --> 00:03:24,657
There was a... thing.

78
00:03:24,682 --> 00:03:27,051
It attacked my uncle
and took his friend.

79
00:03:27,076 --> 00:03:31,781
It was like a bear, but a pig... thing.

80
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Jesus.

81
00:03:33,986 --> 00:03:36,986
It was at my house and
then here at the school!

82
00:03:37,011 --> 00:03:38,465
Everyone says that kid and I look alike.

83
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What if that thing is after me?

84
00:03:39,975 --> 00:03:41,777
Dude, now you're just overreacting.

85
00:03:41,802 --> 00:03:42,731
Attention, please.

86
00:03:42,756 --> 00:03:43,834
Will the following students

87
00:03:43,858 --> 00:03:45,426
report to the principal's office.

88
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Eric Cartman. Kenny McCormick.

89
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Thank you, mkay.

90
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Aw, what did I do this time?

91
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You go first, Kenny.

92
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Mrph rmhmhm rm!

93
00:03:57,216 --> 00:03:58,551
I didn't even do anything wrong!

94
00:03:58,576 --> 00:03:59,580
Mrph rmhmhm rm!

95
00:03:59,605 --> 00:04:01,703
Just stop being a baby, Kenny, and go.

96
00:04:04,044 --> 00:04:06,346
Take a seat boys. Right there.

97
00:04:14,185 --> 00:04:16,456
You know how shitty it is to be a cop?

98
00:04:16,490 --> 00:04:18,745
There's real emergencies every day...

99
00:04:18,770 --> 00:04:20,913
Real people who need real help...

100
00:04:20,938 --> 00:04:23,226
But then, every other minute,
I gotta stop everything

101
00:04:23,251 --> 00:04:24,740
'cause one of you little wads

102
00:04:24,765 --> 00:04:26,436
decides to go and shoot up the school.

103
00:04:26,920 --> 00:04:28,803
Mrph rmhmhm rm!

104
00:04:28,828 --> 00:04:32,830
Shut up! Now, which one of you
had a beef with Colin Brooks?

105
00:04:32,855 --> 00:04:34,723
Nobody gives a shit about Colin Brooks.

106
00:04:34,748 --> 00:04:37,248
Yeah? I asked the kids in this school,

107
00:04:37,273 --> 00:04:38,884
"Who are the biggest loners?

108
00:04:38,909 --> 00:04:41,467
Who's most likely to rage and
be the next school shooter?"

109
00:04:41,492 --> 00:04:42,893
You know what they said?

110
00:04:42,918 --> 00:04:45,787
The fat, ugly, mean kid and the
detached, loner, poor kid.

111
00:04:45,812 --> 00:04:47,313
Hey, I'm not poor, all right?

112
00:04:47,338 --> 00:04:50,074
Or was it both of you? Fess up.

113
00:04:50,099 --> 00:04:51,834
I have people in Horseshoe Overlook

114
00:04:51,859 --> 00:04:53,852
who are depending on
me to get provisions

115
00:04:53,877 --> 00:04:55,353
so we can head back east.

116
00:04:55,562 --> 00:04:57,776
You're playing "Red
Dead Redemption," too?

117
00:04:57,801 --> 00:04:58,818
That's right.

118
00:04:58,843 --> 00:05:01,361
And I'm gonna make both of
you school shooters pay

119
00:05:01,386 --> 00:05:02,954
for wasting my time.

120
00:05:06,219 --> 00:05:07,757
Keep looking. There's a lot of people

121
00:05:07,782 --> 00:05:08,767
saying they saw it, Kyle.

122
00:05:08,792 --> 00:05:09,927
It's not just me.

123
00:05:10,015 --> 00:05:12,102
"Evidence of the
creature of South Park."

124
00:05:12,127 --> 00:05:13,896
This is like a conspiracy website.

125
00:05:13,921 --> 00:05:15,771
It's not a conspiracy, it's real.

126
00:05:15,796 --> 00:05:17,364
Keep going down. There's video.

127
00:05:18,379 --> 00:05:20,020
There! Right there!

128
00:05:23,757 --> 00:05:24,735
That's it.

129
00:05:24,760 --> 00:05:26,498
That's was I saw.

130
00:05:26,941 --> 00:05:29,110
I saw ManBearPig.

131
00:05:29,135 --> 00:05:30,353
ManBearPig?

132
00:05:30,378 --> 00:05:33,077
Don't you remember, dude?
We were warned about this.

133
00:05:33,102 --> 00:05:35,839
That weirdo guy who came and
told us this would happen?

134
00:05:35,864 --> 00:05:37,660
He was right.

135
00:05:37,974 --> 00:05:39,272
You guys! You guys!

136
00:05:39,297 --> 00:05:40,316
The police are trying to say

137
00:05:40,340 --> 00:05:42,206
me and Kenny killed that
douchebag Colin Brooks!

138
00:05:42,230 --> 00:05:43,131
What?

139
00:05:43,156 --> 00:05:44,414
They questioned us for hours.

140
00:05:44,439 --> 00:05:46,670
They said they have enough to
get warrants for our arrest.

141
00:05:46,694 --> 00:05:48,329
But it wasn't you guys.

142
00:05:48,354 --> 00:05:51,023
We know that! What the
hell are we gonna do?!

143
00:05:51,105 --> 00:05:52,372
Who was that ex-president guy?

144
00:05:52,397 --> 00:05:53,377
The one who showed up

145
00:05:53,402 --> 00:05:55,242
and tried to convince
everyone of a ManBearPig?

146
00:05:55,434 --> 00:05:56,969
Mrph rmhmhm rm?

147
00:05:57,635 --> 00:05:59,224
Al Gore.

148
00:06:00,742 --> 00:06:03,463
In my report, you'll see that
Eric Cartman and Kenny McCormick

149
00:06:03,488 --> 00:06:05,490
are believed to have worked together.

150
00:06:05,532 --> 00:06:07,267
I've issued warrants for their arrests,

151
00:06:07,301 --> 00:06:10,139
and this case is now in
the hands of the DA.

152
00:06:10,164 --> 00:06:12,366
And I am finally going home.

153
00:06:12,639 --> 00:06:14,842
Keep McCormick and Cartman
in separate holding cells,

154
00:06:14,875 --> 00:06:16,250
and don't wait on me to book 'em.

155
00:06:16,275 --> 00:06:19,712
I'm gonna be playing "Red Dead
Redemption" for the next 18 hours.

156
00:06:19,737 --> 00:06:20,872
Detective!

157
00:06:20,897 --> 00:06:21,897
Whattt?!

158
00:06:22,045 --> 00:06:23,346
There's more dead kids.

159
00:06:23,371 --> 00:06:25,373
Out in the woods by Stark's Pond.

160
00:06:25,679 --> 00:06:27,126
In the woods?

161
00:06:27,151 --> 00:06:29,287
There was a school
shooting out in the woods?

162
00:06:29,393 --> 00:06:31,062
Outside of school is the one place

163
00:06:31,087 --> 00:06:32,615
kids are supposed to be safe.

164
00:06:32,640 --> 00:06:34,408
They're saying it's really bad, sir.

165
00:06:34,433 --> 00:06:35,618
Need all units.

166
00:06:36,221 --> 00:06:37,734
God damn it.

167
00:06:37,759 --> 00:06:39,437
If these kids don't stop
killing each other,

168
00:06:39,461 --> 00:06:41,426
I'm gonna shoot them all myself.

169
00:06:49,906 --> 00:06:54,077
Hello, we're looking for a government
sort of guy named Al Gore?

170
00:06:54,329 --> 00:06:56,641
Al Gore...? Al Gore...?

171
00:06:56,666 --> 00:06:58,301
Sounds familiar.

172
00:06:58,326 --> 00:07:00,320
He said he was almost president once.

173
00:07:00,345 --> 00:07:01,856
He came to our town to
warn us about something,

174
00:07:01,880 --> 00:07:03,048
and we have to find him.

175
00:07:04,142 --> 00:07:05,588
Yeah.

176
00:07:05,613 --> 00:07:08,182
This looks like Jim Turner.

177
00:07:08,250 --> 00:07:09,451
Mrph rmhmhm?

178
00:07:09,476 --> 00:07:11,696
The state bowling champion
five years in a row.

179
00:07:11,721 --> 00:07:13,189
You can always catch him practicing

180
00:07:13,214 --> 00:07:14,709
down at Gramercy Lanes.

181
00:07:20,477 --> 00:07:21,533
Focus.

182
00:07:22,025 --> 00:07:24,580
Calm. Center.

183
00:07:30,956 --> 00:07:32,357
Yes! Die!

184
00:07:32,382 --> 00:07:33,850
Die, you pins!

185
00:07:33,875 --> 00:07:36,111
We've got a straggler, do we?

186
00:07:36,136 --> 00:07:38,511
You're gonna die just
like the rest of 'em.

187
00:07:38,536 --> 00:07:39,536
Mr. Gore?

188
00:07:39,680 --> 00:07:41,870
Focus. Calm.

189
00:07:42,010 --> 00:07:43,344
Al Gore?

190
00:07:46,923 --> 00:07:50,546
That's a name I haven't
heard in a long time.

191
00:07:50,761 --> 00:07:52,247
I don't know if you remember us,

192
00:07:52,272 --> 00:07:55,008
but we're the kids you got to
help try and capture ManBearPig?

193
00:07:55,227 --> 00:07:57,777
Well, you were right.

194
00:07:57,817 --> 00:07:59,627
Ha. You... You were totally right.

195
00:07:59,702 --> 00:08:01,089
ManBearPig is real,

196
00:08:01,114 --> 00:08:03,417
and, he's killing lots
of people in our town.

197
00:08:04,633 --> 00:08:06,767
Sucks for you.

198
00:08:09,381 --> 00:08:11,316
Please, Mr. Gore! We need your help!

199
00:08:11,341 --> 00:08:13,076
ManBearPig isn't going to stop.

200
00:08:13,101 --> 00:08:15,469
Is it inconvenient now?

201
00:08:15,494 --> 00:08:18,630
I tried to warn you all,
but no one took me cereal.

202
00:08:18,655 --> 00:08:20,623
You all just made fun of me, didn't you?

203
00:08:20,648 --> 00:08:23,250
Well, now you can just
deal with it yourselves.

204
00:08:23,516 --> 00:08:26,652
Please, just tell us how do you stop it?

205
00:08:26,773 --> 00:08:28,690
You stop it all those years ago

206
00:08:28,715 --> 00:08:31,760
when I freaking warned you
and you still had time!

207
00:08:31,785 --> 00:08:33,293
There has to be something
we can still do.

208
00:08:33,317 --> 00:08:34,695
Please, Mr. Gore. You're the only person

209
00:08:34,719 --> 00:08:36,120
who knows anything about it.

210
00:08:37,208 --> 00:08:39,583
Say you're sorry for making fun of me.

211
00:08:40,187 --> 00:08:41,173
We didn't...

212
00:08:41,198 --> 00:08:42,533
We didn't realize there
were more than...

213
00:08:42,557 --> 00:08:45,827
Say you're sorry for making fun of me.

214
00:08:47,278 --> 00:08:49,680
We're sorry for making fun of you.

215
00:08:49,983 --> 00:08:53,651
That didn't sound cereal at all.

216
00:08:59,053 --> 00:09:00,989
You can't just go along

217
00:09:01,022 --> 00:09:03,458
with what people are
saying, Susan, okay?

218
00:09:03,483 --> 00:09:05,252
There's no scientific proof,

219
00:09:05,277 --> 00:09:07,946
no real evidence of a ManBearPig.

220
00:09:07,996 --> 00:09:11,165
Well, there's a lot of smart
people saying ManBearPig is real.

221
00:09:11,199 --> 00:09:14,486
Yeah, and a lot of smarter
people saying it isn't, okay?

222
00:09:14,511 --> 00:09:16,179
What you need to understand, Susan,

223
00:09:16,204 --> 00:09:18,839
is that everyone has an agenda. Okay?

224
00:09:18,864 --> 00:09:21,517
Everyone wants to use the
fear of a ManBearPig

225
00:09:21,542 --> 00:09:22,777
to get what they want.

226
00:09:24,078 --> 00:09:26,681
So they throw around bad
science, bad taxidermy.

227
00:09:26,714 --> 00:09:28,392
People coming out of the woodwork

228
00:09:28,416 --> 00:09:30,317
are now experts on the subject.

229
00:09:31,663 --> 00:09:34,433
But you have to use your
own brain, sweetheart.

230
00:09:34,458 --> 00:09:35,893
You can't just let people tell you

231
00:09:35,918 --> 00:09:37,397
that if you don't believe in ManBearPig,

232
00:09:37,421 --> 00:09:39,089
then you don't care about the world.

233
00:09:39,193 --> 00:09:40,595
It is real!

234
00:09:40,628 --> 00:09:43,865
You wanna believe it's real,
you go right on ahead, Susan.

235
00:09:43,898 --> 00:09:46,634
No, it's right there! It's
right there behind you!

236
00:09:51,912 --> 00:09:54,366
Okay, ManBearPig is real.

237
00:09:54,391 --> 00:09:56,286
What are we gonna do about it now?

238
00:09:56,311 --> 00:09:57,412
What are we gonna do

239
00:09:57,445 --> 00:09:59,414
that's gonna make any
difference now, Susan?

240
00:09:59,447 --> 00:10:01,449
What?! We have to do something!

241
00:10:01,482 --> 00:10:04,319
What can we do that everyone
else will also do, Susan?

242
00:10:04,343 --> 00:10:05,696
Come on, use your brain.

243
00:10:05,721 --> 00:10:07,365
Even if we do something about it...

244
00:10:07,390 --> 00:10:08,746
what about the Chinese?

245
00:10:08,771 --> 00:10:10,988
They're just gonna keep
right on... Ahghhggh!

246
00:10:11,384 --> 00:10:13,820
? For he's a jolly good fellow

247
00:10:13,861 --> 00:10:15,573
? For he's a jolly good fellow

248
00:10:15,598 --> 00:10:17,851
? For he's a jolly good fellow

249
00:10:17,875 --> 00:10:19,697
? That should've been president

250
00:10:19,698 --> 00:10:23,001
Thanks guys! You shouldn't have!

251
00:10:23,049 --> 00:10:24,951
You told us to.

252
00:10:24,976 --> 00:10:27,283
What did you guys get me?

253
00:10:27,308 --> 00:10:29,043
Wow. Look!

254
00:10:29,077 --> 00:10:30,812
It's a "You were right about ManBearPig"

255
00:10:30,845 --> 00:10:32,313
signed picture!

256
00:10:32,347 --> 00:10:33,882
So...

257
00:10:33,907 --> 00:10:35,942
now maybe we can all work together?

258
00:10:36,020 --> 00:10:38,847
Hang on! It's movie time!

259
00:10:38,872 --> 00:10:40,640
Go, go! Start it up.

260
00:10:41,621 --> 00:10:43,790
This is the best party ever.

261
00:10:43,815 --> 00:10:45,817
Look, guys. It's me!

262
00:10:46,172 --> 00:10:49,063
There I am, campaigning to be president!

263
00:10:49,088 --> 00:10:50,989
That's me with Hillary!

264
00:10:51,014 --> 00:10:53,051
There's more of me on
the campaign trail,

265
00:10:53,076 --> 00:10:54,844
so full of dreams!

266
00:10:54,869 --> 00:10:57,972
Look! It's me when I found
out I lost the election!

267
00:10:58,055 --> 00:10:59,456
Boo!

268
00:10:59,481 --> 00:11:00,585
But then look!

269
00:11:00,610 --> 00:11:02,879
There's me getting an Academy Award!

270
00:11:02,939 --> 00:11:05,241
Okay, can we stop ManBearPig now?!

271
00:11:05,266 --> 00:11:07,802
Who said anything about stopping M.B.P.?

272
00:11:07,915 --> 00:11:10,351
Y-You told us to do all this.

273
00:11:10,385 --> 00:11:12,921
Yeah, to make up for ripping on me!

274
00:11:12,954 --> 00:11:14,756
You're still not even gonna help us?!

275
00:11:14,789 --> 00:11:17,358
I've moved on from this life, okay?!

276
00:11:17,392 --> 00:11:19,027
I have a new life now!

277
00:11:19,060 --> 00:11:20,218
I'm a bowler!

278
00:11:20,243 --> 00:11:22,945
And when I'm not bowling,
I help out my gang.

279
00:11:22,970 --> 00:11:24,738
They're my family now!

280
00:11:24,763 --> 00:11:26,327
We're wanted in Blackwater,

281
00:11:26,352 --> 00:11:28,550
and we have to move our camp soon!

282
00:11:29,102 --> 00:11:31,014
You're playing Red Dead Redemption 2?

283
00:11:31,039 --> 00:11:32,674
Yeah. It's amazing.

284
00:11:32,699 --> 00:11:34,451
Only thing is, I have
all these stolen items,

285
00:11:34,475 --> 00:11:36,110
and I don't know how to sell them.

286
00:11:36,333 --> 00:11:37,964
We know how.

287
00:11:38,205 --> 00:11:39,747
Really?

288
00:11:43,809 --> 00:11:46,044
No witnesses to the
attack were left alive.

289
00:11:46,069 --> 00:11:47,826
The same bear and pig
droppings were found

290
00:11:47,851 --> 00:11:49,753
along with human excrement.

291
00:11:49,778 --> 00:11:51,146
I don't believe it.

292
00:11:51,171 --> 00:11:53,340
A school shooting at an ice cream shop.

293
00:11:53,428 --> 00:11:55,096
Damn it! When children leave school,

294
00:11:55,129 --> 00:11:57,365
they're supposed to
be out of harm's way.

295
00:11:57,398 --> 00:11:58,399
Detective!

296
00:11:58,433 --> 00:12:00,301
Sir, we got word on the two suspects.

297
00:12:00,326 --> 00:12:01,983
They appear to be on the run.

298
00:12:02,008 --> 00:12:04,043
I would be, too, if I were guilty.

299
00:12:04,068 --> 00:12:06,416
No one has seen them or
their two closest friends.

300
00:12:06,441 --> 00:12:08,704
A Marsh and Broflovski.

301
00:12:08,876 --> 00:12:11,346
So, we got us a gang of shooters?!

302
00:12:11,379 --> 00:12:15,274
How the hell hard can it
be to find four boys?!

303
00:12:15,299 --> 00:12:16,300
Sir...

304
00:12:16,325 --> 00:12:18,093
Why don't you take a break, sir?

305
00:12:19,020 --> 00:12:20,421
You've been hittin' it hard.

306
00:12:20,479 --> 00:12:22,447
We'll do all we can
to catch these kids.

307
00:12:22,472 --> 00:12:23,539
Go home,

308
00:12:23,564 --> 00:12:25,395
play some "Red Dead Redemption."

309
00:12:26,694 --> 00:12:28,429
Got to admit, I'd love to see the sun

310
00:12:28,463 --> 00:12:30,632
rise over Citadel Rock again.

311
00:12:30,665 --> 00:12:32,667
And I got me a gal who claims she's got

312
00:12:32,700 --> 00:12:34,302
a side mission or two.

313
00:12:34,335 --> 00:12:35,503
Go on home, sir.

314
00:12:35,536 --> 00:12:38,314
We'll take care of everything here.

315
00:12:43,830 --> 00:12:45,116
This is it.

316
00:12:45,141 --> 00:12:47,415
Every piece of information
I ever gathered

317
00:12:47,448 --> 00:12:48,683
on ManBearPig.

318
00:12:48,716 --> 00:12:50,590
Where did ManBearPig come from?

319
00:12:50,615 --> 00:12:52,217
Is it some sort of genetic mutation?

320
00:12:52,242 --> 00:12:54,778
I thought that once, too.

321
00:12:54,803 --> 00:12:57,306
I wanted to find ManBearPig's origins.

322
00:12:57,331 --> 00:13:00,634
And so I created this the Internet.

323
00:13:00,762 --> 00:13:03,131
With that, I was able
to search everywhere

324
00:13:03,164 --> 00:13:04,632
for any bit of data.

325
00:13:04,666 --> 00:13:07,635
And what I learned is
that ManBearPig...

326
00:13:07,669 --> 00:13:09,537
is a demon.

327
00:13:09,570 --> 00:13:10,705
Rmphm?!

328
00:13:10,738 --> 00:13:12,941
This is "The Temptation of St. Anthony"

329
00:13:12,974 --> 00:13:14,542
by Martin Schongauer.

330
00:13:14,575 --> 00:13:16,287
It depicts several demons...

331
00:13:16,311 --> 00:13:20,548
WolfMonkeyGuy, ChickenFishWoman
and ElephantPorcupineMan,

332
00:13:20,573 --> 00:13:21,942
just to name a few.

333
00:13:21,967 --> 00:13:24,721
All of them demons sent
by the Devil himself.

334
00:13:25,229 --> 00:13:26,888
My God.

335
00:13:26,921 --> 00:13:27,939
What?

336
00:13:27,964 --> 00:13:29,666
I should play "Red Dead"
on this computer,

337
00:13:29,691 --> 00:13:30,758
with all three screens.

338
00:13:30,792 --> 00:13:32,794
That'd be so bitchin' sweet.

339
00:13:32,827 --> 00:13:34,929
Why did the devil send ManBearPig?!

340
00:13:34,963 --> 00:13:36,397
Why does the devil do anything?

341
00:13:36,431 --> 00:13:38,099
He's the freakin' devil. He's a dick.

342
00:13:39,737 --> 00:13:41,205
It's probably too late.

343
00:13:41,230 --> 00:13:43,432
By now ManBearPig is so powerful

344
00:13:43,457 --> 00:13:45,039
that the only way to get rid of him

345
00:13:45,073 --> 00:13:47,634
is to send him back to hell.

346
00:13:48,007 --> 00:13:51,740
We're going to have to
do a demonic ritual.

347
00:13:52,315 --> 00:13:53,615
All I can say is,

348
00:13:53,648 --> 00:13:55,850
you boys better get
to the grocery store,

349
00:13:55,883 --> 00:13:59,559
'cause it's time... to get cereal.

350
00:14:05,226 --> 00:14:07,195
Harrison Yates, where have ya been?!

351
00:14:07,228 --> 00:14:09,497
Another school shooting, Maggie.

352
00:14:09,522 --> 00:14:11,436
Down at Baskin-Robbins.

353
00:14:13,596 --> 00:14:16,666
I haven't seen you in days.
I've missed you so much.

354
00:14:16,691 --> 00:14:18,459
Come have some supper with me.

355
00:14:18,484 --> 00:14:20,875
Maggie, I just need to
relax a bit, all right?

356
00:14:20,908 --> 00:14:22,043
Please.

357
00:14:22,076 --> 00:14:23,645
I've been waiting for this a long time.

358
00:14:23,678 --> 00:14:25,046
Just give me a...

359
00:14:25,079 --> 00:14:26,428
Wait a minute.

360
00:14:26,881 --> 00:14:29,217
The house in Valentine is built?

361
00:14:29,400 --> 00:14:31,368
Where did I get a sniper rifle?

362
00:14:31,653 --> 00:14:32,620
Maggie!

363
00:14:32,654 --> 00:14:34,522
Did you play over my save game?

364
00:14:34,555 --> 00:14:36,057
I just played a little bit.

365
00:14:36,081 --> 00:14:38,536
A little bit, you... On my save game?!

366
00:14:38,561 --> 00:14:40,328
Why didn't you start your own?!

367
00:14:40,361 --> 00:14:41,696
You're never home anymore!

368
00:14:41,729 --> 00:14:43,264
With all these school shootin's!

369
00:14:43,298 --> 00:14:45,276
I need a life, too, ya know!

370
00:14:45,301 --> 00:14:47,170
So I robbed a lumber
mill in Monto's Rest,

371
00:14:47,195 --> 00:14:49,231
upgraded my horse, and
got a sniper rifle.

372
00:14:49,337 --> 00:14:51,205
That's my life, Maggie!

373
00:14:51,230 --> 00:14:52,731
I was going for more honor points!

374
00:14:52,774 --> 00:14:53,975
God damn it!

375
00:14:54,008 --> 00:14:55,944
Why can't we have a life together?!

376
00:14:55,977 --> 00:14:57,879
I haven't gotten to play in three days.

377
00:14:57,912 --> 00:14:59,514
You've done all this stuff without me!

378
00:14:59,547 --> 00:15:01,082
You got deputized?!

379
00:15:02,721 --> 00:15:04,156
God damn it! That does it.

380
00:15:04,181 --> 00:15:05,149
Where are ya goin'?!

381
00:15:05,174 --> 00:15:07,109
I'm starting a new life!

382
00:15:07,134 --> 00:15:08,669
I'm creating a new save game.

383
00:15:08,831 --> 00:15:10,366
You can't possibly go all the way back

384
00:15:10,391 --> 00:15:11,593
to the snow level again!

385
00:15:11,626 --> 00:15:13,595
What choice do I have now?!

386
00:15:16,827 --> 00:15:18,310
Bitch.

387
00:15:29,606 --> 00:15:32,442
Abbul abash my-ah.

388
00:15:32,467 --> 00:15:34,941
What Satan has put forth upon this earth

389
00:15:34,966 --> 00:15:38,636
may it be summoned and banished forever.

390
00:15:39,676 --> 00:15:41,111
Dude, come on, what are we doing?

391
00:15:41,136 --> 00:15:43,672
This is stupid. He was right before.

392
00:15:43,841 --> 00:15:47,011
We call upon the powers of darkness.

393
00:15:47,458 --> 00:15:49,947
Come on, guys. We call upon...

394
00:15:49,981 --> 00:15:53,318
We call upon the powers of darkness.

395
00:15:53,351 --> 00:15:55,420
Al Gore was right.

396
00:15:55,453 --> 00:15:57,989
Al Gore was right all along.

397
00:15:58,013 --> 00:16:00,783
Al Gore was right all along.

398
00:16:00,832 --> 00:16:03,902
We should have listened to Al Gore.

399
00:16:03,928 --> 00:16:06,964
We should have all listened
to Al Gor... Wait.

400
00:16:06,998 --> 00:16:08,499
Wait. Are you videoing us?

401
00:16:08,533 --> 00:16:10,468
It's Instagram live. Keep going!

402
00:16:10,501 --> 00:16:13,504
We should have taken
Al Gore more cereal.

403
00:16:13,538 --> 00:16:15,106
All right. All right. That's enough.

404
00:16:15,139 --> 00:16:16,908
You need to stop wasting
our time, dude.

405
00:16:16,941 --> 00:16:17,999
People are dying!

406
00:16:18,024 --> 00:16:19,643
You don't have a clue what you're doing!

407
00:16:30,755 --> 00:16:32,357
You were saying?

408
00:16:32,390 --> 00:16:33,491
Aw, shit!

409
00:16:33,524 --> 00:16:34,592
God Damn it! Nothing!

410
00:16:34,625 --> 00:16:36,561
I'm sorry! I'm sorry!

411
00:16:49,732 --> 00:16:53,320
Do you all have any idea what's
it's like to start over?!

412
00:16:53,345 --> 00:16:55,650
You walk four hours through the snow

413
00:16:55,675 --> 00:16:57,448
relearning everything,

414
00:16:57,482 --> 00:16:59,484
all because your bitch
wife went and spent

415
00:16:59,517 --> 00:17:02,720
all your hard earned money
on upgrades you didn't want!

416
00:17:02,754 --> 00:17:04,622
I get one little break from work...

417
00:17:04,656 --> 00:17:07,288
One little break... and
I didn't even get back

418
00:17:07,313 --> 00:17:09,502
to the first brawl at the saloon.

419
00:17:10,332 --> 00:17:11,963
You can actually bypass that fight

420
00:17:11,996 --> 00:17:13,364
if you go hunting with Dutch.

421
00:17:13,398 --> 00:17:14,699
Shut up!

422
00:17:14,732 --> 00:17:17,402
These school shootings
are done, you hear me?!

423
00:17:17,435 --> 00:17:20,033
I want this case closed
by the end of the night,

424
00:17:20,058 --> 00:17:21,481
one way or another!

425
00:17:21,506 --> 00:17:23,307
Now, let's move out!

426
00:17:23,966 --> 00:17:25,710
Here he comes, boys!

427
00:17:25,869 --> 00:17:27,638
Prepare yourselves!

428
00:17:39,078 --> 00:17:42,427
Who hath summoned me to this realm?!

429
00:17:42,460 --> 00:17:44,395
Dude! You summoned Satan!

430
00:17:44,429 --> 00:17:47,865
Yeah no doi! What'dya
think we were doing?!

431
00:17:47,899 --> 00:17:52,136
Prince of darkness! It is I, Al Gore!

432
00:17:52,170 --> 00:17:54,772
I was almost president!

433
00:17:54,806 --> 00:17:58,843
What do you wish of me, Al Gore?!

434
00:17:58,876 --> 00:18:00,011
A demon from Hell

435
00:18:00,044 --> 00:18:02,347
has been unleashed upon our world!

436
00:18:02,380 --> 00:18:04,649
We demand to know its nature!

437
00:18:04,682 --> 00:18:07,618
We demand to know its reason for coming!

438
00:18:07,652 --> 00:18:12,729
There is only one place you can
find the answers you seek!

439
00:18:12,754 --> 00:18:15,193
It is the place where all knowledge

440
00:18:15,226 --> 00:18:17,462
becomes known!

441
00:18:17,495 --> 00:18:20,465
Your local library.

442
00:18:21,287 --> 00:18:22,967
You are correct.

443
00:18:23,001 --> 00:18:26,004
Your local library is
an excellent resource

444
00:18:26,037 --> 00:18:28,106
for whatever you wish to learn.

445
00:18:28,139 --> 00:18:30,308
Yes, it is.

446
00:18:30,341 --> 00:18:32,377
Then I command thee, Satan,

447
00:18:32,410 --> 00:18:34,846
to come with us to the local library!

448
00:18:34,879 --> 00:18:37,281
And I am cereal!

449
00:18:37,315 --> 00:18:39,450
Dude, Satan's not gonna
go with us to the...

450
00:18:39,484 --> 00:18:43,945
Very well, Al Gore. Let us go!

451
00:18:47,191 --> 00:18:49,494
Yeah, guys! Guys, over here!

452
00:18:50,024 --> 00:18:51,471
I think I found it.

453
00:18:51,496 --> 00:18:54,298
What you're dealing with
is a Sifter of Fate.

454
00:18:54,332 --> 00:18:55,700
Mrph rmhmhm?

455
00:18:55,733 --> 00:18:58,503
So there's these demons
that, actually come

456
00:18:58,536 --> 00:19:00,405
once every few generations.

457
00:19:00,447 --> 00:19:02,649
They're all about making deals.

458
00:19:02,674 --> 00:19:03,808
Making deals?

459
00:19:03,841 --> 00:19:05,076
Yeah, check it out.

460
00:19:05,109 --> 00:19:08,112
"The Sifter of Fate thrives
on tempting mankind.

461
00:19:08,146 --> 00:19:11,037
It will always offer a deal
in exchange for mercy,

462
00:19:11,062 --> 00:19:13,159
but the carnage will be
a thousand times worse

463
00:19:13,184 --> 00:19:14,619
when the debt comes due."

464
00:19:14,652 --> 00:19:15,753
Okay, so wait.

465
00:19:15,787 --> 00:19:17,689
Now you're saying that
someone in our town

466
00:19:17,722 --> 00:19:18,990
made a deal with that thing?

467
00:19:19,023 --> 00:19:21,459
Now it's here to claim
it's part of the bargain.

468
00:19:21,492 --> 00:19:23,003
It's sort of like when
you're part of a gang

469
00:19:23,027 --> 00:19:24,929
feuding with a rival gang, you know.

470
00:19:24,962 --> 00:19:26,073
You ride around on your horse

471
00:19:26,097 --> 00:19:27,441
thinking it won't all catch up with you,

472
00:19:27,465 --> 00:19:29,267
but it always does.

473
00:19:29,300 --> 00:19:31,502
You're playing "Red
Dead Redemption," too?

474
00:19:31,536 --> 00:19:32,937
So good, right?

475
00:19:34,117 --> 00:19:36,620
Attention, school shooters!

476
00:19:36,741 --> 00:19:39,277
We have you surrounded!

477
00:19:39,310 --> 00:19:41,625
Come out with your hands up!

478
00:19:41,979 --> 00:19:44,315
Jesus. You gotta tell them, Mr. Gore!

479
00:19:44,349 --> 00:19:45,750
Tell them it wasn't us!

480
00:19:45,783 --> 00:19:48,519
No. They don't listen to me, kids.

481
00:19:48,553 --> 00:19:51,122
It's up to you young people now.

482
00:19:51,155 --> 00:19:54,292
You have to find a way to get
people to take this cereal.

483
00:19:54,325 --> 00:19:56,627
You must convince people
there's a ManBearPig,

484
00:19:56,661 --> 00:19:58,997
which Satan told you
is a Fate Sifter demon

485
00:19:59,030 --> 00:20:01,992
that made a deal with
someone in this town!

486
00:20:02,200 --> 00:20:03,735
That's gonna be impossible.

487
00:20:03,768 --> 00:20:06,004
Yeah, sounds really hard, doesn't it?

488
00:20:06,037 --> 00:20:07,147
People might not believe you

489
00:20:07,171 --> 00:20:08,673
and, like, make fun of you and stuff.

490
00:20:08,706 --> 00:20:10,141
Poor you guys, eh?

491
00:20:16,282 --> 00:20:17,683
They are coming out!

492
00:20:17,708 --> 00:20:19,617
Hands where we can see em!

493
00:20:19,651 --> 00:20:23,254
Everyone, listen! ManBearPig is real.

494
00:20:23,287 --> 00:20:25,456
It's a demon that
thrives on making deals

495
00:20:25,490 --> 00:20:27,759
to exploit mankind's weaknesses.

496
00:20:27,792 --> 00:20:30,595
I am super-duper cereal.

497
00:20:32,655 --> 00:20:37,301
We all have to work together,
you guys. This one time.

498
00:20:37,335 --> 00:20:39,437
We have to all put our pride aside

499
00:20:39,470 --> 00:20:42,728
and be willing to say,
maybe we were wrong.

500
00:20:42,819 --> 00:20:45,485
All right, lock these little up!

501
00:20:46,302 --> 00:20:48,413
No! You can't!

502
00:20:48,446 --> 00:20:51,115
That's it, gentlemen! Case closed.

503
00:20:51,149 --> 00:20:53,484
Now I've got a God
damn stagecoach to rob

504
00:20:53,518 --> 00:20:55,019
in Scarlett Meadows!

505
00:20:55,053 --> 00:20:56,688
Well done, sir!

506
00:20:56,721 --> 00:20:58,690
No! Noooo!

507
00:20:58,723 --> 00:21:01,693
Please! Somebody made a
deal with ManBearPig!

508
00:21:01,726 --> 00:21:03,494
We have to find out who!

509
00:21:05,014 --> 00:21:06,716
Billy...

510
00:21:06,741 --> 00:21:08,532
what have I done?

511
00:21:08,557 --> 00:21:13,117
credits