1
00:00:02,246 --> 00:00:04,546
Hey, did you guys know
this year's the 40th anniversary

2
00:00:04,615 --> 00:00:06,915
of Halloween?
- Oh, nonsense.

3
00:00:06,917 --> 00:00:08,183
Halloween traditions

4
00:00:08,252 --> 00:00:10,492
of date back to the Celtic
festival of Samhain.

5
00:00:10,621 --> 00:00:12,388
Although our current
Halloween customs

6
00:00:12,456 --> 00:00:14,723
come from the evening
before All Hallows' Day--

7
00:00:14,792 --> 00:00:17,760
All Hallows' Eve--
thus, Halloween.

8
00:00:17,828 --> 00:00:19,561
I meant the movie Halloween.

9
00:00:19,630 --> 00:00:21,330
Oh.

10
00:00:21,399 --> 00:00:23,465
Well, that's not
interesting at all.

11
00:00:23,534 --> 00:00:25,345
Did you know the Michael Myers
mask from the film

12
00:00:25,369 --> 00:00:27,736
was actually a Captain Kirk
mask turned inside out?

13
00:00:27,805 --> 00:00:29,972
Okay, now it's interesting.

14
00:00:31,275 --> 00:00:33,375
Are you guys
all dressing up for work?

15
00:00:33,444 --> 00:00:34,521
Of course.
I mean, how often

16
00:00:34,545 --> 00:00:36,378
do you get to wear
costumes to work?

17
00:00:36,447 --> 00:00:39,748
Says the man with a giant
belt buckle and a dickey.

18
00:00:39,817 --> 00:00:43,218
Hey, this is not a costume.
It's a choice. It's a style.

19
00:00:43,287 --> 00:00:45,487
It's a tragedy.

20
00:00:45,556 --> 00:00:47,434
Bernadette, why don't we
get to dress up at work?

21
00:00:47,458 --> 00:00:50,192
We used to, but a couple guys
in the infectious disease lab

22
00:00:50,261 --> 00:00:52,995
went as zombies
and it triggered a quarantine.

23
00:00:54,065 --> 00:00:56,498
The CDC was so mad.

24
00:00:56,567 --> 00:01:00,235
Hey, if you really want to dress
up, we could throw a party.

25
00:01:00,304 --> 00:01:02,137
Oh, that would be fun.

26
00:01:02,206 --> 00:01:03,950
You know, I used to throw
Halloween parties all the time

27
00:01:03,974 --> 00:01:05,240
when I moved into the building.

28
00:01:05,309 --> 00:01:07,743
All the time? I only remember
being invited to one.

29
00:01:09,013 --> 00:01:11,013
Please don't make this
awkward for me.

30
00:01:12,583 --> 00:01:14,616
Okay, so,
Friday night--

31
00:01:14,685 --> 00:01:16,318
Halloween party here.
- Okay.

32
00:01:16,387 --> 00:01:17,486
Great. Can't wait.

33
00:01:17,555 --> 00:01:18,787
What are you going as?

34
00:01:18,856 --> 00:01:20,322
I don't want
to ruin the surprise.

35
00:01:20,391 --> 00:01:21,868
You'll see it at work.
Just a warning:

36
00:01:21,892 --> 00:01:23,258
it's pretty scary.

37
00:01:23,327 --> 00:01:25,127
- Is it a bird?
- No.

38
00:01:25,196 --> 00:01:26,762
- Is it a dog?
- No.

39
00:01:26,831 --> 00:01:28,197
Oh, I think
I'll be fine, then.

40
00:01:33,337 --> 00:01:35,904
Hello.

41
00:01:35,973 --> 00:01:37,272
Hello.

42
00:01:39,143 --> 00:01:40,709
I see you are dressed
as Doc Brown

43
00:01:40,778 --> 00:01:42,177
from Back to the Future.

44
00:01:42,246 --> 00:01:44,224
May I assume that Amy is going
as his wife, Clara Clayton,

45
00:01:44,248 --> 00:01:46,815
from Back to the Future
Part III?

46
00:01:46,884 --> 00:01:48,417
She is.

47
00:02:02,366 --> 00:02:05,134
Did you do something
different to your hair?

48
00:02:06,270 --> 00:02:08,070
Yes.

49
00:02:09,907 --> 00:02:11,073
Looking good.

50
00:02:12,856 --> 00:02:16,856
? The Big Bang Theory 12x06 ?
The Imitation Perturbation

51
00:02:16,881 --> 00:02:20,149
? Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ?

52
00:02:20,217 --> 00:02:23,719
? Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ?

53
00:02:23,788 --> 00:02:25,320
? The Earth began to cool ?

54
00:02:25,389 --> 00:02:28,023
? The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ?

55
00:02:28,092 --> 00:02:30,492
? We built the Wall ?
? We built the pyramids ?

56
00:02:30,561 --> 00:02:33,228
? Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ?

57
00:02:33,297 --> 00:02:35,130
? That all started
with a big bang ?

58
00:02:35,199 --> 00:02:36,765
? Bang! ?

59
00:02:36,789 --> 00:02:43,789
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man

60
00:02:47,165 --> 00:02:49,732
Oh, Inspector Gadget.

61
00:02:49,800 --> 00:02:51,300
And I want to say

62
00:02:51,369 --> 00:02:54,136
Supreme Court Justice
Ruth Bader Ginsburg.

63
00:02:54,205 --> 00:02:55,671
So close.

64
00:02:55,740 --> 00:02:57,940
Kooth Bader Ginsburg.

65
00:02:58,009 --> 00:02:59,775
The Notorious KBG.

66
00:02:59,844 --> 00:03:01,477
That's very clever.

67
00:03:01,546 --> 00:03:03,112
Sustained.

68
00:03:04,549 --> 00:03:06,849
Are you gonna dress in drag
in front of your fiancée?

69
00:03:06,918 --> 00:03:09,318
Yeah. We have no secrets
from each other.

70
00:03:09,387 --> 00:03:11,820
Well, except for the fact that
I-I crocheted this myself.

71
00:03:19,564 --> 00:03:20,496
Hey, Sheldon.

72
00:03:20,565 --> 00:03:22,765
- Hello.
- Hello.

73
00:03:26,571 --> 00:03:27,903
Oh, my God,

74
00:03:27,972 --> 00:03:29,505
you look amazing.

75
00:03:29,574 --> 00:03:31,018
I find you guilty of murder,

76
00:03:31,042 --> 00:03:33,609
because you are killing it.

77
00:03:33,678 --> 00:03:35,088
Well, technically,

78
00:03:35,112 --> 00:03:37,057
the Supreme Court wouldn't
determine a defendant's

79
00:03:37,081 --> 00:03:38,641
guilt or innocence
in a criminal matter.

80
00:03:38,683 --> 00:03:40,816
They could only reverse
or revamp a jury's conviction

81
00:03:40,885 --> 00:03:43,552
based on a constitutional
or statutory issue.

82
00:03:46,724 --> 00:03:48,123
Why are you laughing?

83
00:03:49,260 --> 00:03:50,993
His statement
was factually correct.

84
00:03:52,597 --> 00:03:54,897
You're sitting in my spot.

85
00:03:56,033 --> 00:03:57,533
You don't have a spot.

86
00:03:57,602 --> 00:03:59,479
- What is wrong with you today?
- Maybe he's cranky

87
00:03:59,503 --> 00:04:02,338
because he's off
his bathroom schedule.

88
00:04:03,908 --> 00:04:06,642
Well, I can understand how that
would make someone irritable.

89
00:04:06,711 --> 00:04:09,478
Interesting fact: "irritable"
comes from the Latin,

90
00:04:09,547 --> 00:04:11,814
"susceptible to anger."

91
00:04:11,882 --> 00:04:13,582
Just because I used a word

92
00:04:13,651 --> 00:04:15,184
doesn't mean
I want its etymology.

93
00:04:15,253 --> 00:04:16,919
Interesting fact:
"etymology"

94
00:04:16,988 --> 00:04:18,065
comes from the
Greek word...

95
00:04:18,089 --> 00:04:19,989
You are being so annoying.
Stop it.

96
00:04:21,292 --> 00:04:23,192
And why are you two laughing?

97
00:04:23,261 --> 00:04:25,861
Sheldon, he's being you.

98
00:04:25,930 --> 00:04:27,429
He's dressed as you
for Halloween.

99
00:04:39,210 --> 00:04:41,410
Oh.

100
00:04:41,479 --> 00:04:43,312
So you're not
laughing at him.

101
00:04:43,381 --> 00:04:45,481
You're laughing at me.

102
00:04:45,549 --> 00:04:47,049
We're not laughing at you.

103
00:04:47,118 --> 00:04:48,217
We're laughing with you.

104
00:04:48,286 --> 00:04:50,719
But I'm not laughing.

105
00:04:51,822 --> 00:04:53,656
Then the first one.

106
00:04:58,129 --> 00:05:00,062
Ready to go?

107
00:05:00,131 --> 00:05:02,231
Hey, why aren't you
in your costume?

108
00:05:02,300 --> 00:05:04,066
I just didn't feel like it.

109
00:05:04,135 --> 00:05:06,135
You get that I'm wearing
a corset because of you,

110
00:05:06,203 --> 00:05:08,537
not because I'm tired
of breathing?

111
00:05:08,606 --> 00:05:12,174
Amy, do you think I'm
always correcting other people?

112
00:05:12,243 --> 00:05:15,711
No, not all the time.
I mean, just last week,

113
00:05:15,780 --> 00:05:17,420
Penny ended a sentence
with a preposition.

114
00:05:17,481 --> 00:05:18,562
You didn't even mention it.

115
00:05:19,318 --> 00:05:20,236
True.

116
00:05:20,318 --> 00:05:23,519
I just waited until I got home
and screamed into a pillow.

117
00:05:25,623 --> 00:05:27,156
Is something bothering you?

118
00:05:28,259 --> 00:05:30,426
Howard dressed up as me
and imitated me,

119
00:05:30,494 --> 00:05:31,894
and everyone laughed.

120
00:05:31,962 --> 00:05:35,197
Oh. Well,
that must have felt terrible.

121
00:05:35,266 --> 00:05:37,132
It did. I never realized

122
00:05:37,201 --> 00:05:39,568
my friends viewed me
as an object of ridicule.

123
00:05:39,637 --> 00:05:41,637
Oh, I don't think that's true.

124
00:05:41,706 --> 00:05:43,105
They laughed, Amy.

125
00:05:43,174 --> 00:05:46,175
In a derisive way.
Not in the instructive way

126
00:05:46,243 --> 00:05:48,711
I laugh at them
when they're being stupid.

127
00:05:52,516 --> 00:05:54,483
- Hey, happy Halloween.
- Oh!

128
00:05:54,552 --> 00:05:56,552
- Trick or treat.
- No.

129
00:05:56,620 --> 00:05:58,854
Sorry, you're not
wearing a costume.

130
00:05:58,923 --> 00:06:02,458
Yeah, I am.
I'm a pharmaceutical sales rep.

131
00:06:02,526 --> 00:06:03,959
I'm gonna need more.

132
00:06:04,028 --> 00:06:07,329
Okay, failed actress
who traded constant rejection

133
00:06:07,398 --> 00:06:10,199
for a Christmas bonus
and a dental plan?

134
00:06:10,267 --> 00:06:12,634
- Go nuts.
- Oh.

135
00:06:13,838 --> 00:06:15,304
I will.

136
00:06:15,373 --> 00:06:17,473
So, what are you
wearing to the party?

137
00:06:17,541 --> 00:06:20,242
Sexy cat? Sexy nurse?
Sexy zombie?

138
00:06:20,311 --> 00:06:22,111
Why do girls' costumes
have to be sexy

139
00:06:22,179 --> 00:06:23,679
but guys' costumes don't?

140
00:06:23,748 --> 00:06:26,782
Say that again
with this helicopter on my head.

141
00:06:29,387 --> 00:06:30,886
Very cute.

142
00:06:30,955 --> 00:06:33,455
Hey, do you remember
what happened

143
00:06:33,524 --> 00:06:36,058
at that first Halloween party
that you invited me to?

144
00:06:36,127 --> 00:06:37,860
When I threw up in the pumpkin?

145
00:06:38,963 --> 00:06:40,896
More memorable than that.

146
00:06:40,965 --> 00:06:44,166
Really?
That was pretty impressive.

147
00:06:44,235 --> 00:06:46,602
We had our first kiss.

148
00:06:46,670 --> 00:06:48,170
On this very couch.

149
00:06:48,239 --> 00:06:50,205
No, no, our first kiss was
at your birthday.

150
00:06:50,274 --> 00:06:51,540
Remember? I threw you a party,

151
00:06:51,609 --> 00:06:53,442
you didn't make it,
and I felt bad for you.

152
00:06:53,511 --> 00:06:56,712
No, no, it was on Halloween,

153
00:06:56,781 --> 00:06:58,881
and you felt bad for me.

154
00:06:58,949 --> 00:07:00,883
If we're gonna go
through every party

155
00:07:00,951 --> 00:07:03,819
where I felt bad for you,
we're gonna be here awhile.

156
00:07:03,888 --> 00:07:05,554
Never mind.

157
00:07:05,623 --> 00:07:07,147
What? You're not mad
at me, are you?

158
00:07:07,171 --> 00:07:07,991
No.

159
00:07:07,992 --> 00:07:09,336
Of course not.
No, we just remember

160
00:07:09,360 --> 00:07:10,504
different things
from that party.

161
00:07:10,528 --> 00:07:11,660
I remember falling in love,

162
00:07:11,729 --> 00:07:13,729
and you remember vomiting
in a pumpkin.

163
00:07:13,798 --> 00:07:15,631
I was, like,
four feet away.

164
00:07:15,699 --> 00:07:17,299
People cheered.

165
00:07:19,703 --> 00:07:22,004
- Here you go.
- Thanks.

166
00:07:22,072 --> 00:07:24,907
So, did you see
Howard's costume?

167
00:07:24,975 --> 00:07:27,376
See it? I made it.
It was hilarious.

168
00:07:27,445 --> 00:07:31,647
Well, Sheldon didn't think so,
and neither did I.

169
00:07:31,715 --> 00:07:33,649
Oh, come on.
It was all in good fun.

170
00:07:33,717 --> 00:07:36,885
Well, I'm sure it was,
but Sheldon's feelings got hurt.

171
00:07:36,954 --> 00:07:39,121
M-Maybe Howard could apologize?

172
00:07:39,190 --> 00:07:40,656
You're kidding, right?

173
00:07:40,724 --> 00:07:42,391
Sheldon didn't apologize

174
00:07:42,460 --> 00:07:45,794
when he said my baby looked
like Winston Churchill.

175
00:07:45,863 --> 00:07:46,895
He loves Churchill.

176
00:07:46,964 --> 00:07:49,665
Your son should take that
as a compliment.

177
00:07:49,733 --> 00:07:51,533
He said it about my daughter.

178
00:07:52,636 --> 00:07:54,937
Well, this isn't about Sheldon.

179
00:07:55,005 --> 00:07:56,939
This is about Howard.

180
00:07:57,007 --> 00:07:58,807
I think it is
about Sheldon.

181
00:07:58,876 --> 00:08:01,677
How many times has he made fun
of Howard for being an engineer?

182
00:08:01,745 --> 00:08:04,046
Going to MIT? His magic?

183
00:08:04,114 --> 00:08:06,348
Sheldon doesn't make fun
of his magic.

184
00:08:06,417 --> 00:08:08,050
Well, he should. It's stupid.

185
00:08:10,054 --> 00:08:11,520
Anyway, the point is,

186
00:08:11,589 --> 00:08:13,789
Sheldon shouldn't dish it out
if he can't take it.

187
00:08:13,858 --> 00:08:16,859
I think the point is
that Howard owes him an apology.

188
00:08:16,927 --> 00:08:18,227
Yeah, well, I think the point is

189
00:08:18,295 --> 00:08:19,606
if Sheldon has a problem
with Howard,

190
00:08:19,630 --> 00:08:21,163
Sheldon should take it up
with him.

191
00:08:21,232 --> 00:08:23,232
Mama.

192
00:08:23,300 --> 00:08:24,666
Now, if you'll excuse me,

193
00:08:24,735 --> 00:08:27,569
the prime minister of England
needs her diaper changed.

194
00:08:31,442 --> 00:08:33,442
Hey.

195
00:08:33,511 --> 00:08:35,077
Oh,
that's great.

196
00:08:35,145 --> 00:08:37,346
He's a Supreme Court justice,

197
00:08:37,414 --> 00:08:38,914
and you're the
U.S. Constitution.

198
00:08:38,983 --> 00:08:41,783
Yep. He interprets me.

199
00:08:42,786 --> 00:08:44,553
And guess what's
underneath this?

200
00:08:44,622 --> 00:08:46,188
The Bill of Tights.

201
00:08:47,691 --> 00:08:51,894
Smart, funny, gorgeous--
are we a match or what?

202
00:08:51,962 --> 00:08:54,029
Hey, Bert,
what are you dressed as?

203
00:08:54,098 --> 00:08:56,031
I'll give you a hint.

204
00:08:56,100 --> 00:08:58,033
My work in seismic refraction
measurements and...

205
00:08:58,102 --> 00:09:00,569
Hey, Stuart,
what are you dressed as?

206
00:09:00,638 --> 00:09:02,571
I'm a butterfly.

207
00:09:02,640 --> 00:09:05,240
Did you steal those from
Halley's "let's pretend" box?

208
00:09:05,309 --> 00:09:06,875
I'm gonna put them back.

209
00:09:07,945 --> 00:09:09,745
All right, I'll tell you.

210
00:09:09,813 --> 00:09:13,916
I'm Maurice "Doc" Ewing, winner
of the 1960 Vetlesen Prize,

211
00:09:13,984 --> 00:09:17,119
generally regarded
as the Nobel Prize of geology.

212
00:09:17,187 --> 00:09:19,755
Oh, yeah. Now I see it.

213
00:09:19,823 --> 00:09:21,223
Ask me how I died.

214
00:09:21,292 --> 00:09:23,625
Spoiler alert: brain hemorrhage.

215
00:09:24,728 --> 00:09:26,662
Well, Gorblimey.

216
00:09:26,730 --> 00:09:28,664
You look
like a thousand tuppence.

217
00:09:28,732 --> 00:09:30,666
Don't he, Mary Poppins?

218
00:09:30,734 --> 00:09:33,602
Are you gonna talk
like that all night?

219
00:09:33,671 --> 00:09:35,037
Jiff willikers, I am.

220
00:09:35,105 --> 00:09:37,205
Isn't he cute?

221
00:09:37,274 --> 00:09:39,775
He's gonna get a
spoonful of sugar later.

222
00:09:39,843 --> 00:09:42,511
And I'm gonna sweep
Ms. Poppins' chimney.

223
00:09:45,215 --> 00:09:47,015
So, here we are.

224
00:09:47,084 --> 00:09:50,118
On Halloween.
On this couch.

225
00:09:50,187 --> 00:09:51,787
Does it ring any bells?

226
00:09:51,855 --> 00:09:53,255
Really? We're still doing this?

227
00:09:53,324 --> 00:09:55,891
I'm just surprised you don't
remember our first kiss.

228
00:09:55,960 --> 00:09:58,794
Fine.
It was on Halloween.

229
00:09:58,862 --> 00:10:00,262
Are you agreeing
just to shut me up?

230
00:10:00,331 --> 00:10:01,964
You got another way?
I'm all ears.

231
00:10:03,601 --> 00:10:06,368
- Really? An arranged marriage?
- Yeah.

232
00:10:06,437 --> 00:10:07,536
I know how it sounds.

233
00:10:07,605 --> 00:10:09,605
It sounds awesome.

234
00:10:10,541 --> 00:10:12,174
Is that just an Indian thing,

235
00:10:12,242 --> 00:10:13,976
or can I get a piece of that?

236
00:10:16,080 --> 00:10:18,714
You know the woman
has a choice, right?

237
00:10:18,782 --> 00:10:20,315
There's always a catch.

238
00:10:23,253 --> 00:10:25,187
Happy Halloween.

239
00:10:30,728 --> 00:10:32,527
Who wants to
see a magic trick?

240
00:10:32,596 --> 00:10:34,696
Oh, that's right.
No one.

241
00:10:37,468 --> 00:10:40,602
Ha! They're you.

242
00:10:45,430 --> 00:10:46,829
What do you think you're doing?

243
00:10:46,898 --> 00:10:48,297
I thought it was clear.

244
00:10:48,366 --> 00:10:51,700
I'm being unnecessarily hurtful
but with a sweet voice.

245
00:10:53,438 --> 00:10:55,037
And I don't understand
what's going on

246
00:10:55,106 --> 00:10:57,006
because I went to MIT.

247
00:10:58,843 --> 00:11:00,743
Okay, guys, I think
that's enough.

248
00:11:00,812 --> 00:11:02,578
Hold on. I'm
the judge here,

249
00:11:02,647 --> 00:11:05,581
and I'm going to allow it.

250
00:11:05,650 --> 00:11:06,650
Raj, take a break.

251
00:11:06,717 --> 00:11:07,650
Hey, free speech.

252
00:11:07,718 --> 00:11:09,385
Right back there
somewhere.

253
00:11:11,422 --> 00:11:12,655
You
know what, guys?

254
00:11:12,723 --> 00:11:14,768
You got us. Congratulations.
Now why don't you go back

255
00:11:14,792 --> 00:11:16,537
to your apartment and put
on your other costumes.

256
00:11:16,561 --> 00:11:18,260
Oh, but it's so far away,

257
00:11:18,329 --> 00:11:21,230
and I have such
teeny, tiny legs.

258
00:11:21,299 --> 00:11:24,166
Really? Our bodies?
Is that where we're going, Amy?

259
00:11:24,235 --> 00:11:25,579
What's wrong with my body?

260
00:11:25,603 --> 00:11:28,537
Well, for starters,
you have a quarter in your nose.

261
00:11:33,411 --> 00:11:35,511
Not now, Sheldon.

262
00:11:35,580 --> 00:11:37,780
I don't get invited
to a lot of parties.

263
00:11:37,849 --> 00:11:39,248
Is this a good one?

264
00:11:39,317 --> 00:11:41,383
Oh, yeah.

265
00:11:50,328 --> 00:11:53,629
Did that guacamole
taste weird to you?

266
00:11:56,701 --> 00:11:58,901
Tasted weird to me.

267
00:11:59,971 --> 00:12:02,104
Can't believe Amy did that.

268
00:12:02,173 --> 00:12:03,739
Oh, come on.
You thought it was funny

269
00:12:03,808 --> 00:12:05,107
when I dressed up as Sheldon.

270
00:12:05,176 --> 00:12:06,609
That was totally different.

271
00:12:06,677 --> 00:12:08,978
- How?
- That didn't hurt my feelings.

272
00:12:10,277 --> 00:12:12,448
Well, for what it's worth,

273
00:12:12,517 --> 00:12:14,683
I didn't think it was
a very good impression of you.

274
00:12:14,752 --> 00:12:17,620
Really? You don't think I have
an annoying high-pitched voice?

275
00:12:17,688 --> 00:12:18,954
No, not at all.

276
00:12:19,023 --> 00:12:23,159
In fact, I find your voice
quite melodious.

277
00:12:23,227 --> 00:12:25,060
Mm-hmm. And you don't think

278
00:12:25,129 --> 00:12:27,530
I'm unnecessarily hurtful?

279
00:12:28,633 --> 00:12:30,032
What? I'm sorry.

280
00:12:30,101 --> 00:12:32,935
I-I couldn't hear the question.
I just heard the music.

281
00:12:37,375 --> 00:12:39,975
Well, people came,
they ate, they vowed

282
00:12:40,044 --> 00:12:41,321
to never speak
to each other again.

283
00:12:41,345 --> 00:12:43,846
I think it was
a successful party.

284
00:12:43,915 --> 00:12:46,615
It was.
And I'm sorry about earlier.

285
00:12:46,684 --> 00:12:47,983
I know it doesn't matter.

286
00:12:48,052 --> 00:12:50,986
No, it does matter.

287
00:12:51,055 --> 00:12:52,488
Okay? You were right.

288
00:12:52,557 --> 00:12:53,856
It was Halloween.

289
00:12:53,925 --> 00:12:56,325
I was dressed as a cat,
you were a hobbit.

290
00:12:56,394 --> 00:12:58,727
It was right there
on that couch.

291
00:12:58,796 --> 00:13:01,263
Why didn't you just say that?

292
00:13:01,332 --> 00:13:04,066
Because I always hated
that was our first kiss.

293
00:13:04,135 --> 00:13:06,035
I was drunk, and I
was still with Kurt,

294
00:13:06,103 --> 00:13:08,437
and I was using you to
make myself feel better.

295
00:13:08,506 --> 00:13:11,140
I... just wanted our first
kiss to mean something.

296
00:13:11,209 --> 00:13:13,209
That's why I said it was
the one on your birthday.

297
00:13:14,312 --> 00:13:16,946
I like that.

298
00:13:17,014 --> 00:13:19,748
We'll make that
our official first kiss.

299
00:13:19,817 --> 00:13:23,752
Thank you. Aw.

300
00:13:24,822 --> 00:13:26,055
That was beautiful.

301
00:13:29,427 --> 00:13:31,894
- Mm.
- What are you still doing here?

302
00:13:31,963 --> 00:13:33,662
I was in the bathroom.

303
00:13:33,731 --> 00:13:36,265
Guacamole didn't agree with me.

304
00:13:36,334 --> 00:13:38,601
Well, since you're here,
you can help us clean up.

305
00:13:38,669 --> 00:13:40,569
Will you take this out, please?
Sure.

306
00:13:40,638 --> 00:13:42,004
Thank you.

307
00:13:42,073 --> 00:13:45,574
It's late. Would you mind
if I crashed here tonight?

308
00:13:45,643 --> 00:13:46,875
You are always welcome here.

309
00:13:46,944 --> 00:13:49,311
- Thank you.
- Mm-hmm.

310
00:13:55,553 --> 00:13:56,585
Where were we?

311
00:13:59,557 --> 00:14:02,791
I think Howard hurting
my feelings has in some ways

312
00:14:02,860 --> 00:14:04,226
made me a better person.

313
00:14:04,295 --> 00:14:06,428
Hmm. Look at you,
improving on perfection.

314
00:14:06,497 --> 00:14:08,297
How so?

315
00:14:08,366 --> 00:14:09,632
As you were eating that Danish,

316
00:14:09,700 --> 00:14:11,967
I wanted to point out
that the Danish

317
00:14:12,036 --> 00:14:13,202
isn't Danish at all.

318
00:14:13,271 --> 00:14:14,937
It was imported
by Austrian bakers

319
00:14:15,006 --> 00:14:16,406
during a labor dispute
in the 1800s.

320
00:14:16,474 --> 00:14:18,841
But I chose not to,

321
00:14:18,909 --> 00:14:20,669
because I didn't want to be
the kind of fella

322
00:14:20,711 --> 00:14:23,145
who foists unwanted facts
about European pastries

323
00:14:23,214 --> 00:14:25,347
on the unwilling.

324
00:14:25,416 --> 00:14:27,583
Huh. That's actually
interesting.

325
00:14:27,652 --> 00:14:30,252
Sorry. Now you'll never know.

326
00:14:30,321 --> 00:14:32,187
Hey, guys, I need your help.

327
00:14:32,256 --> 00:14:34,123
Bernadette's still pretty upset

328
00:14:34,191 --> 00:14:35,658
about your costumes.

329
00:14:35,726 --> 00:14:36,992
She's upset?

330
00:14:37,061 --> 00:14:39,361
Those pants I wore to make fun
of you were so tight,

331
00:14:39,430 --> 00:14:41,530
I risked a testicular hernia.

332
00:14:41,599 --> 00:14:43,599
Anyway,

333
00:14:43,668 --> 00:14:46,669
if you guys could apologize,
it'd be a big help.

334
00:14:46,737 --> 00:14:49,104
Oh, we'd be happy
to apologize to her

335
00:14:49,173 --> 00:14:50,839
as soon as she apologizes to me

336
00:14:50,908 --> 00:14:52,941
for not making you apologize
to Sheldon.

337
00:14:53,010 --> 00:14:54,043
I didn't follow that,

338
00:14:54,111 --> 00:14:55,789
but, then, between my wife
and that guacamole,

339
00:14:55,813 --> 00:14:58,147
I didn't get a lot
of sleep last night.

340
00:14:58,215 --> 00:14:59,882
Don't you think
it's unreasonable

341
00:14:59,950 --> 00:15:02,785
for her to ask us to do
something she refused to do?

342
00:15:02,853 --> 00:15:05,654
Yes. So when can you
stop by?

343
00:15:05,723 --> 00:15:07,267
I don't understand.
If it's unreasonable,

344
00:15:07,291 --> 00:15:08,490
why should we do it?

345
00:15:08,559 --> 00:15:10,203
Okay, how about this?
You know in Star Wars

346
00:15:10,227 --> 00:15:12,795
when R2 and Chewbacca
were playing holochess?

347
00:15:12,863 --> 00:15:14,396
Really? Star Wars?

348
00:15:14,465 --> 00:15:16,965
Amy, let the man speak.

349
00:15:17,034 --> 00:15:18,701
Well, Chewbacca

350
00:15:18,769 --> 00:15:21,537
was losing
and getting angry and...

351
00:15:21,605 --> 00:15:25,174
W-W-Wait. Are you saying
we should let the Wookiee win?

352
00:15:25,242 --> 00:15:26,575
Hey.

353
00:15:26,644 --> 00:15:28,977
Hey, that's my wife
you're talking about.

354
00:15:30,981 --> 00:15:33,449
But yes, let the Wookiee win.

355
00:15:39,557 --> 00:15:41,724
Hello, Bernadette.

356
00:15:41,792 --> 00:15:44,360
Wait, did you just walk
into my house?

357
00:15:44,428 --> 00:15:46,562
No, Howard let me in.

358
00:15:46,630 --> 00:15:47,663
Where is he?

359
00:15:47,732 --> 00:15:50,632
Oh, he got in his car
and drove away.

360
00:15:51,736 --> 00:15:53,102
Oh.

361
00:15:53,170 --> 00:15:54,903
Is that watermelon
for anybody?

362
00:15:54,972 --> 00:15:57,740
- It's for Halley.
- Is she gonna eat all of it?

363
00:15:57,808 --> 00:15:59,375
God, no wonder
she looks like Churchill.

364
00:16:01,479 --> 00:16:03,579
What do you want, Sheldon?

365
00:16:03,647 --> 00:16:05,914
Howard said
your feelings were hurt.

366
00:16:05,983 --> 00:16:07,316
Well, Howard's wrong.
I don't care

367
00:16:07,385 --> 00:16:08,717
if someone makes fun of me.

368
00:16:08,786 --> 00:16:11,019
All right.

369
00:16:11,088 --> 00:16:13,756
Apparently I came
all this way for nothing.

370
00:16:13,824 --> 00:16:17,092
Unless Halley wants to share
that watermelon?

371
00:16:17,161 --> 00:16:19,072
You think Amy's the first person
to make fun of me

372
00:16:19,096 --> 00:16:20,429
for having a squeaky voice?

373
00:16:21,198 --> 00:16:22,731
Do you?

374
00:16:22,800 --> 00:16:24,566
I feel like my chance
at watermelon

375
00:16:24,635 --> 00:16:26,802
is dangling by a thread.

376
00:16:26,871 --> 00:16:29,071
She's not. It's been happening
my whole life.

377
00:16:29,140 --> 00:16:31,440
And-and she called me out
for being mean?

378
00:16:31,509 --> 00:16:33,375
Well, I've had to be mean.

379
00:16:35,646 --> 00:16:37,579
It's hard to be taken seriously

380
00:16:37,648 --> 00:16:39,782
when you're always
the smallest person in the room.

381
00:16:39,850 --> 00:16:41,016
I know that.

382
00:16:41,085 --> 00:16:43,218
I was in high school
when I was nine years old.

383
00:16:43,287 --> 00:16:44,953
I tried to tell
the other kids

384
00:16:45,022 --> 00:16:46,989
that although
my physical stature was small,

385
00:16:47,057 --> 00:16:49,258
my intellectual stature
towered over them.

386
00:16:49,326 --> 00:16:53,395
That only seemed
to make things worse.

387
00:16:53,464 --> 00:16:57,166
The kids called me
Bernadette the marionette.

388
00:16:57,234 --> 00:16:59,735
Because you're small.
That's funny.

389
00:17:00,838 --> 00:17:02,104
No, it's not.

390
00:17:02,173 --> 00:17:05,240
Well, people used
to call me egghead

391
00:17:05,309 --> 00:17:07,209
'cause there were eggs
on my head.

392
00:17:07,278 --> 00:17:09,244
'Cause they threw them at me.

393
00:17:09,313 --> 00:17:10,746
That's terrible.

394
00:17:11,949 --> 00:17:13,982
One time my brothers
made me breathe helium.

395
00:17:14,051 --> 00:17:15,584
I tried to call for help,

396
00:17:15,653 --> 00:17:18,387
but the only one
who could hear me was the dog.

397
00:17:20,491 --> 00:17:23,358
That's also terrible.

398
00:17:23,427 --> 00:17:26,094
My goodness, you had to live
in a house with a dog.

399
00:17:26,163 --> 00:17:30,666
I guess we both had to put up
with a lot of crap from people.

400
00:17:30,734 --> 00:17:33,836
I suppose we have. Huh.

401
00:17:33,904 --> 00:17:36,271
Maybe you and I are more alike
than we thought.

402
00:17:36,340 --> 00:17:38,106
Maybe we are.

403
00:17:38,175 --> 00:17:40,843
Although I'm exceptionally tall,
and you're exceptionally...

404
00:17:40,911 --> 00:17:43,278
- Sheldon.
- You didn't even let me finish.

405
00:17:43,347 --> 00:17:45,347
- Fine. Sorry.
- Short.

406
00:17:51,511 --> 00:17:53,211
Sheldon, you sure
you're ready for this?

407
00:17:53,279 --> 00:17:55,713
- This movie's pretty scary.
- Please.

408
00:17:55,782 --> 00:17:57,615
I'm an adult.
I think I can handle it.

409
00:17:57,684 --> 00:18:01,152
That's what you said about the
butterfly pavilion at the zoo.

410
00:18:01,221 --> 00:18:03,521
That was my fault.
After I pet that goat,

411
00:18:03,590 --> 00:18:05,890
I felt like a gladiator.

412
00:18:05,959 --> 00:18:07,325
Okay, lights on, or lights off?

413
00:18:07,393 --> 00:18:11,229
Lights off. If I'm gonna
do this, I want to do it right.

414
00:18:16,536 --> 00:18:18,469
What do you guys think
you're doing?

415
00:18:18,538 --> 00:18:20,171
We're showing
Sheldon Halloween.

416
00:18:20,240 --> 00:18:22,306
Absolutely not.
Sheldon, come home.

417
00:18:24,310 --> 00:18:26,444
But I really want
to watch it.

418
00:18:26,512 --> 00:18:28,846
I know you do,
but I am forbidding it.

419
00:18:28,915 --> 00:18:30,848
Oh, man. Sorry, guys.

420
00:18:35,488 --> 00:18:37,808
- What took you so long?
- I'm sorry. I just got your text!

421
00:18:39,098 --> 00:18:46,098
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man