1 00:00:05,680 --> 00:00:08,734 I had a great time with you last night. 2 00:00:08,735 --> 00:00:11,088 Well, this morning wasn't too bad either. 3 00:00:11,712 --> 00:00:14,781 Don't you forget to hydrate. 4 00:00:15,983 --> 00:00:18,484 Those are your friends over there? 5 00:00:22,856 --> 00:00:26,159 I've never seen them before in my life. 6 00:00:26,160 --> 00:00:28,494 No, Hank. For the last time. 7 00:00:28,495 --> 00:00:31,164 This is the signal for "W" 8 00:00:31,165 --> 00:00:33,399 This is the signal for "P" 9 00:00:36,270 --> 00:00:37,837 Wait, what's that the signal for? 10 00:00:37,838 --> 00:00:40,640 Oh, I don't know. It's just something weird my arm does. 11 00:00:40,641 --> 00:00:43,476 Don't even tell me what you guys are doing. 12 00:00:43,477 --> 00:00:45,178 I don't want to know. 13 00:00:45,179 --> 00:00:46,813 If you must know, Margaret, 14 00:00:46,814 --> 00:00:48,648 I got to pass this eye test 15 00:00:48,649 --> 00:00:51,150 so I can renew my license for my golf cart. 16 00:00:51,151 --> 00:00:52,552 So to make sure I'm gonna pass it, 17 00:00:52,553 --> 00:00:53,987 we runnin' a little scam. 18 00:00:53,988 --> 00:00:56,055 To be real, the eye test is the scam. 19 00:00:56,056 --> 00:00:58,057 It's Western medicine, man. 20 00:00:58,058 --> 00:01:00,159 You know, the government designed this test 21 00:01:00,160 --> 00:01:02,195 - to make our eyes worse. - Mm. 22 00:01:02,196 --> 00:01:03,930 But you're wearing glasses right now. 23 00:01:03,931 --> 00:01:07,367 Yeah, I know. I am a victim of it myself. 24 00:01:07,368 --> 00:01:09,068 But think about this. 25 00:01:09,069 --> 00:01:11,537 What are glasses made of? 26 00:01:11,538 --> 00:01:13,172 Glass. 27 00:01:15,042 --> 00:01:16,943 And what is glass made of? 28 00:01:16,944 --> 00:01:18,411 Sand. 29 00:01:18,412 --> 00:01:20,446 And where does sand come from? 30 00:01:20,447 --> 00:01:22,915 The Middle East. 31 00:01:24,351 --> 00:01:26,919 I'm not getting glasses. 32 00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:29,422 That's the first stop on the road to death. 33 00:01:30,724 --> 00:01:32,725 Hank, just don't drive a golf cart. 34 00:01:32,726 --> 00:01:34,494 You could use the steps. 35 00:01:36,530 --> 00:01:39,866 "Just don't drive a golf cart." 36 00:01:41,902 --> 00:01:42,935 Ah... 37 00:01:42,936 --> 00:01:44,604 Margaret. 38 00:01:46,006 --> 00:01:48,975 The dating scene at Shady Meadows is a pyramid. 39 00:01:48,976 --> 00:01:51,344 At the top of the pyramid, that's the stallions... 40 00:01:51,345 --> 00:01:52,745 they have the golf carts. 41 00:01:52,746 --> 00:01:54,080 - Right. - At the bottom, 42 00:01:54,081 --> 00:01:56,349 those are the walkers, the slugs. 43 00:01:56,350 --> 00:01:57,984 Me, I'm a stallion. 44 00:01:57,985 --> 00:02:01,387 I crush those slugs under my thundering hooves. 45 00:02:01,388 --> 00:02:04,323 Mm. The thundering hooves of your golf cart. 46 00:02:04,324 --> 00:02:06,158 - That's right. - Boy. 47 00:02:06,159 --> 00:02:09,228 Is there anybody normal around here I can have breakfast with? 48 00:02:09,229 --> 00:02:10,963 Howdy, folks. 49 00:02:10,964 --> 00:02:13,733 Boy, it's a nice day to drink beer, 50 00:02:13,734 --> 00:02:17,336 watch football and... not have sex with men. 51 00:02:19,506 --> 00:02:21,941 Did y'all buy that? 52 00:02:34,992 --> 00:02:41,092 Subtitle sync and corrections by awaqeded for www.addic7ed.com. 53 00:02:46,366 --> 00:02:48,234 What is going on, Sid? 54 00:02:48,235 --> 00:02:49,573 My son Walt just told me 55 00:02:49,574 --> 00:02:51,175 he's dropping by for a visit. 56 00:02:51,176 --> 00:02:53,377 In an hour, Margaret. An hour. 57 00:02:53,378 --> 00:02:55,446 Well, what is wrong with that? 58 00:02:55,447 --> 00:02:59,350 Why are you dressed like Woody from Toy Story? 59 00:02:59,351 --> 00:03:02,420 I'm trying to dress like a straight person, 60 00:03:02,421 --> 00:03:05,089 because Walt does not know I'm gay. 61 00:03:07,325 --> 00:03:09,894 Wait a minute. 62 00:03:09,895 --> 00:03:12,663 You're not out to your son? How could he not know? 63 00:03:12,664 --> 00:03:14,799 I see the struggle that you're having there, Margaret. 64 00:03:14,800 --> 00:03:16,801 It's a struggle that we've all had ourselves. 65 00:03:16,802 --> 00:03:18,769 - Yep. - Now, what we've landed on... 66 00:03:18,770 --> 00:03:20,638 and no offense, Sid... is that, um, 67 00:03:20,639 --> 00:03:22,773 that boy's just not bright. 68 00:03:22,774 --> 00:03:24,675 Wait. 69 00:03:24,676 --> 00:03:27,044 I-I'm just still trying to wrap my head around the fact 70 00:03:27,045 --> 00:03:29,080 that somebody could see you and know you 71 00:03:29,081 --> 00:03:31,248 and think that you're straight. 72 00:03:31,249 --> 00:03:33,217 Kids just believe their dads. 73 00:03:33,218 --> 00:03:34,952 You know, I get the dad thing. 74 00:03:34,953 --> 00:03:36,733 I always thought my dad was a rich dentist. 75 00:03:37,122 --> 00:03:41,125 Turns out he was just the guy that shot JFK. 76 00:03:43,228 --> 00:03:47,331 Well, as great as Charlie's example is, I... 77 00:03:47,332 --> 00:03:50,968 I still think you should just try telling your son the truth. 78 00:03:50,969 --> 00:03:53,070 I can't. I can't. 79 00:03:53,071 --> 00:03:55,339 I've lied to him his entire life. 80 00:03:55,340 --> 00:03:56,640 If I told him the truth right now, 81 00:03:56,641 --> 00:03:59,009 it would blow up our entire relationship. 82 00:03:59,010 --> 00:04:00,911 He'd be shattered. 83 00:04:00,912 --> 00:04:03,614 Just shattered to smithereens. 84 00:04:05,016 --> 00:04:07,184 He really doesn't know? 85 00:04:08,820 --> 00:04:11,655 Okay, Walt's gonna be here in 30 minutes. 86 00:04:11,656 --> 00:04:13,824 I removed all the gay stuff from my room. 87 00:04:13,825 --> 00:04:15,726 Tell me if I missed anything. 88 00:04:21,967 --> 00:04:23,868 I'd say you missed everything. 89 00:04:28,440 --> 00:04:32,943 Okay, this couch looks pretty straight to me. 90 00:04:32,944 --> 00:04:34,712 One second. 91 00:04:35,647 --> 00:04:37,348 - Oh! - There. 92 00:04:37,349 --> 00:04:39,350 Perfect. 93 00:04:39,351 --> 00:04:42,013 And I brought you a bunch of straight guy stuff from my room, 94 00:04:42,014 --> 00:04:43,248 so you could hang it up here. 95 00:04:43,249 --> 00:04:45,417 I'm giving you my football phone. 96 00:04:46,886 --> 00:04:49,220 My bikini girl poster. 97 00:04:52,858 --> 00:04:55,827 And, uh... Charles Barkley cologne. 98 00:04:55,828 --> 00:04:59,397 Don't get this on your skin; this is clothes only. 99 00:04:59,398 --> 00:05:02,667 Am I pretending to be a straight man or a 15-year-old boy? 100 00:05:02,668 --> 00:05:05,303 If you figure out the difference, let me know. 101 00:05:05,304 --> 00:05:08,840 Now, I got to look and see that there's football all weekend 102 00:05:08,841 --> 00:05:10,976 so we can sail through till Sunday. 103 00:05:10,977 --> 00:05:13,311 Yeah, or here's a crazy thought. 104 00:05:13,312 --> 00:05:15,480 You could maybe just communicate with your son. 105 00:05:18,317 --> 00:05:21,252 Margaret. Communication between fathers and sons 106 00:05:21,253 --> 00:05:24,055 is a series of nods and grunts 107 00:05:24,056 --> 00:05:27,859 and decade-long bouts of silence. 108 00:05:27,860 --> 00:05:30,862 My dad gave me a grunt of approval once, and I wept. 109 00:05:30,863 --> 00:05:33,498 Later on, by myself, in the dark so he couldn't see me. 110 00:05:36,002 --> 00:05:37,936 Thank you, Charlie. 111 00:05:39,205 --> 00:05:41,573 You know what? I want no part of this. 112 00:05:41,574 --> 00:05:43,808 I'm just gonna go back to my room 113 00:05:43,809 --> 00:05:47,645 and try not to think about what Hank has done to that poster. 114 00:05:50,349 --> 00:05:53,952 What'd you do to that poster? 115 00:05:53,953 --> 00:05:57,956 I don't do it to the poster, I do it to myself. 116 00:05:57,957 --> 00:05:59,958 Oh, he's here! 117 00:05:59,959 --> 00:06:02,193 He's here. He's here. 118 00:06:02,194 --> 00:06:03,695 I mean, uh... 119 00:06:03,696 --> 00:06:05,530 let's get ready to rock and roll, people. 120 00:06:06,699 --> 00:06:09,467 - Walt. - What's up, Pop? 121 00:06:09,468 --> 00:06:12,303 Oh, my little man! 122 00:06:12,304 --> 00:06:13,772 Ho, ho, ho! 123 00:06:13,773 --> 00:06:16,441 Ha-ha! How are Tammy and the boys? 124 00:06:16,442 --> 00:06:19,210 Oh, Tammy's good, and the boys bite each other a lot. 125 00:06:19,211 --> 00:06:21,212 It's hilarious. 126 00:06:21,213 --> 00:06:23,348 - Oh, you fellas must be... - I'm Charlie. 127 00:06:23,349 --> 00:06:24,349 ...Charlie and Hank. 128 00:06:24,350 --> 00:06:25,917 - Yeah. - How are you? 129 00:06:25,918 --> 00:06:27,519 We must be. 130 00:06:27,520 --> 00:06:29,587 Walt, what's with the surprise visit? 131 00:06:29,588 --> 00:06:31,689 Well, I came to see where you live. 132 00:06:31,690 --> 00:06:34,626 And see who your friends are, what your life's like. 133 00:06:34,627 --> 00:06:37,062 You keep making excuses for why I can't visit you, 134 00:06:37,063 --> 00:06:38,963 so I decided to come on my own. 135 00:06:38,964 --> 00:06:40,398 Plus, it's the big game. 136 00:06:41,567 --> 00:06:43,101 - The Cowboys. - Oh, the Cowboys! 137 00:06:43,102 --> 00:06:44,736 The Dallas Cowboys! I love 'em! 138 00:06:44,737 --> 00:06:47,472 They're the tits! Which I also love. 139 00:06:48,641 --> 00:06:50,041 You caught last week's game, right? 140 00:06:50,042 --> 00:06:51,776 You see all those sacks our boys got? 141 00:06:51,777 --> 00:06:55,380 Oh, did I ever! It was Sacks Fifth Avenue out there. 142 00:06:55,381 --> 00:06:57,215 Oh! 143 00:06:58,484 --> 00:06:59,851 Hilarious as always, Dad. 144 00:06:59,852 --> 00:07:01,352 Well, park it, buster. 145 00:07:01,353 --> 00:07:02,787 Let's watch some football. 146 00:07:02,788 --> 00:07:04,689 I'm gonna sit right on these chips, 147 00:07:04,690 --> 00:07:06,858 'cause it doesn't bother me at all. 148 00:07:10,529 --> 00:07:11,763 Yeah. 149 00:07:11,764 --> 00:07:13,164 - Yeah. - Yeah. 150 00:07:13,165 --> 00:07:15,967 Mm-hmm. 151 00:07:18,637 --> 00:07:20,472 Whose kimono is this? 152 00:07:20,473 --> 00:07:22,140 Mi... 153 00:07:22,141 --> 00:07:24,042 My, my, my. 154 00:07:24,043 --> 00:07:26,811 Well, whose is it? 155 00:07:26,812 --> 00:07:28,213 Whose is it? 156 00:07:28,214 --> 00:07:30,748 Whose is it? Whose? Whose, indeed. 157 00:07:30,749 --> 00:07:33,485 Well, well, isn't that the, um, doesn't belong to that, uh, 158 00:07:33,486 --> 00:07:36,254 babe you been hooking up with? You know, the hot babe. 159 00:07:36,255 --> 00:07:38,156 That's right. That's right. 160 00:07:38,157 --> 00:07:41,126 It's a... it's a beautiful lady's kimono. 161 00:07:41,127 --> 00:07:43,561 She took it off for the intercourse. 162 00:07:45,097 --> 00:07:47,799 It's all comin' back to me now. 163 00:07:49,135 --> 00:07:50,635 - Hmm? - Mm. 164 00:07:50,636 --> 00:07:54,072 We got to go take an eye test. 165 00:07:55,975 --> 00:07:58,309 Dad, you're seeing someone? 166 00:07:58,310 --> 00:08:00,178 That's great! 167 00:08:00,179 --> 00:08:03,148 I mean, I haven't heard you talk about a woman since Mom. 168 00:08:03,149 --> 00:08:05,583 Well, that's true... I haven't touched a woman 169 00:08:05,584 --> 00:08:07,185 since your mother. 170 00:08:08,754 --> 00:08:10,855 Uh, let's get back to football. Want to? 171 00:08:10,856 --> 00:08:13,858 - I love football. Mm-hmm. - No, hang on, Dad. 172 00:08:13,859 --> 00:08:15,493 Who is this woman? 173 00:08:15,494 --> 00:08:17,228 Tell me more about her. 174 00:08:17,229 --> 00:08:20,932 Well, as you probably gathered from the kimono, uh... 175 00:08:20,933 --> 00:08:22,800 she's Japanese. 176 00:08:24,003 --> 00:08:26,538 Of, uh, royal blood. 177 00:08:26,539 --> 00:08:29,007 But she's very down-to-earth. 178 00:08:29,008 --> 00:08:31,042 She's actually worked in the earth. 179 00:08:31,043 --> 00:08:32,210 Uh... 180 00:08:32,211 --> 00:08:34,512 she's a coal miner. 181 00:08:34,513 --> 00:08:36,080 Wow. 182 00:08:36,081 --> 00:08:38,149 She sounds like an incredible woman. 183 00:08:38,150 --> 00:08:39,651 What's her name? 184 00:08:39,652 --> 00:08:41,653 Her name? 185 00:08:41,654 --> 00:08:44,422 Uh, uh, her name, uh... 186 00:08:45,224 --> 00:08:46,758 Oh. Margaret! 187 00:08:46,759 --> 00:08:48,059 Yeah. Me, Margaret. 188 00:08:48,060 --> 00:08:49,427 I forgot my purse. 189 00:08:49,428 --> 00:08:50,995 You also forgot your kimono. 190 00:08:51,830 --> 00:08:52,997 Walt, meet Margaret, 191 00:08:52,998 --> 00:08:54,899 my royal Japanese... 192 00:08:54,900 --> 00:08:56,768 coal-mining lover. 193 00:09:09,850 --> 00:09:12,652 I cannot believe that I agreed to this. 194 00:09:12,653 --> 00:09:14,754 I'm sorry. I tried to get us out of it, 195 00:09:14,755 --> 00:09:16,589 but he insisted on lunch. 196 00:09:16,590 --> 00:09:19,659 Just so you know, I don't approve of any of this at all. 197 00:09:19,660 --> 00:09:22,195 And you're gonna do my income taxes this year. 198 00:09:22,196 --> 00:09:26,933 Well, that shouldn't be hard... I think I can add zero to zero. 199 00:09:26,934 --> 00:09:29,302 You really want to insult me right now? 200 00:09:29,303 --> 00:09:31,971 I'm sorry, I'm just a Stressy Bessy. 201 00:09:31,972 --> 00:09:34,941 All right, just bring me up to speed 202 00:09:34,942 --> 00:09:37,877 on all this nonsense you've spewed. 203 00:09:37,878 --> 00:09:41,014 So I'm a... Japanese coal miner? 204 00:09:41,015 --> 00:09:44,684 Royal Japanese coal miner. 205 00:09:44,685 --> 00:09:47,820 Oh. That makes much more sense. 206 00:09:47,821 --> 00:09:51,190 I had a kimono in my hand and a gun to my head. 207 00:09:51,191 --> 00:09:53,092 I was free-associating. 208 00:09:53,093 --> 00:09:55,328 At least you're interesting now. 209 00:09:56,263 --> 00:09:57,764 Sorry. Sorry. 210 00:09:57,765 --> 00:10:00,166 Uh, sorry about that. 211 00:10:00,167 --> 00:10:01,701 Tammy was just checking in. 212 00:10:01,702 --> 00:10:04,370 The boys set off firecracker in the toilet. 213 00:10:04,371 --> 00:10:05,772 And I'm pissed. 214 00:10:05,773 --> 00:10:08,307 I mean, you hate to miss the important stuff. 215 00:10:10,344 --> 00:10:13,212 All right, stick to the story and don't add anything. 216 00:10:13,213 --> 00:10:16,282 - Got it. - So, let's get to know each other. 217 00:10:16,283 --> 00:10:18,151 Where'd y'all meet? 218 00:10:18,152 --> 00:10:20,086 - Here. - The bayou. 219 00:10:23,724 --> 00:10:26,159 Margaret. Margaret. 220 00:10:26,160 --> 00:10:28,828 Margaret, I think my dad wants to talk to you 221 00:10:28,829 --> 00:10:30,963 underneath the table. 222 00:10:37,171 --> 00:10:40,339 Why did I say bayou? 223 00:10:40,340 --> 00:10:43,409 I was gonna ask you the same question. 224 00:10:43,410 --> 00:10:46,345 Well, what should we do? 225 00:10:46,346 --> 00:10:48,714 Not this. 226 00:10:51,085 --> 00:10:53,386 Well, yeah, uh, we met here. 227 00:10:53,387 --> 00:10:56,322 When I said "bayou," I-I meant "by you." 228 00:10:56,323 --> 00:11:00,560 Of course, I was referring to you, being Margaret, my lover. 229 00:11:00,561 --> 00:11:02,495 I love you, baby. 230 00:11:03,497 --> 00:11:05,831 We're back on track. 231 00:11:11,138 --> 00:11:14,107 Hank! Hear you might need glasses. 232 00:11:14,108 --> 00:11:16,652 Pretty soon, you're gonna look as cool as me. 233 00:11:16,653 --> 00:11:18,320 Take a hike, Dudley. 234 00:11:19,923 --> 00:11:21,102 I hope this works. 235 00:11:21,103 --> 00:11:22,891 How am I supposed to pass this stupid eye test? 236 00:11:22,892 --> 00:11:24,781 I stole the shock collar 237 00:11:24,782 --> 00:11:27,016 from Betsy Donahue's Pomeranian. 238 00:11:27,017 --> 00:11:30,787 Put it in your pocket, and I will buzz you for each letter. 239 00:11:30,788 --> 00:11:33,089 One for "A," two for "B"... 240 00:11:33,090 --> 00:11:34,357 That's beautiful, Charlie. 241 00:11:34,358 --> 00:11:36,760 Yeah, I'm not done. Three for "C"... 242 00:11:36,761 --> 00:11:38,728 Yeah, I-I got it, and I love it. 243 00:11:38,729 --> 00:11:41,397 This stallion's about to be set loose. 244 00:11:41,398 --> 00:11:44,267 By renewing his license to drive an electric golf cart. 245 00:11:44,268 --> 00:11:46,269 See? 246 00:11:46,270 --> 00:11:47,871 Yeah, you hear that? 247 00:11:47,872 --> 00:11:49,372 That's the sound of freedom. 248 00:11:49,373 --> 00:11:52,575 Horse freedom. 249 00:11:52,576 --> 00:11:54,577 What's up, guys? I'm Dr. Chad. 250 00:11:54,578 --> 00:11:57,781 Oh, another mindless disciple of Western medicine. 251 00:11:57,782 --> 00:12:00,984 Nice to meet you, "Doctor" Chad. 252 00:12:00,985 --> 00:12:04,187 We're here for the, uh... "eye" test. 253 00:12:05,147 --> 00:12:06,490 Does he need to be here? 254 00:12:06,491 --> 00:12:08,103 Do you need to be here? 255 00:12:08,659 --> 00:12:12,328 Okay, Hank, let's start with the top line. 256 00:12:12,329 --> 00:12:15,765 If you don't pass this test, I will be shocked. 257 00:12:17,434 --> 00:12:19,536 All right then I'm gonna 258 00:12:19,537 --> 00:12:21,671 start on the... top line 259 00:12:21,672 --> 00:12:23,106 with that big one right there. 260 00:12:23,107 --> 00:12:24,541 And it is... 261 00:12:24,542 --> 00:12:26,442 Ooh! Geez. "A"? 262 00:12:26,443 --> 00:12:29,412 Correct. 263 00:12:29,413 --> 00:12:32,448 How big is that Pomeranian 264 00:12:32,449 --> 00:12:35,952 So, I told my, um, 265 00:12:35,953 --> 00:12:38,188 coal miner, uh, foreman 266 00:12:38,189 --> 00:12:40,590 that, uh, 267 00:12:40,591 --> 00:12:44,961 just because my dad is the emperor, um... 268 00:12:44,962 --> 00:12:48,865 it doesn't mean that I should get special attention. 269 00:12:51,268 --> 00:12:54,570 Isn't... she... amazing? 270 00:12:56,307 --> 00:12:59,142 Wow. That is an incredible story. 271 00:13:00,311 --> 00:13:02,745 Margaret, I-I got to say, and-and forgive me 272 00:13:02,746 --> 00:13:04,914 if I'm speaking out of turn, but... 273 00:13:04,915 --> 00:13:07,917 you do not look particularly Japanese. 274 00:13:07,918 --> 00:13:11,354 Walt, I didn't raise you like that. 275 00:13:14,058 --> 00:13:16,326 No, that's fine. I get it all the time. 276 00:13:16,327 --> 00:13:18,828 Actually, I'm only, uh, half Japanese. 277 00:13:18,829 --> 00:13:20,263 - Yeah. - Which half? 278 00:13:20,264 --> 00:13:22,198 Uh... the... 279 00:13:22,199 --> 00:13:24,233 the bottom half. 280 00:13:33,477 --> 00:13:35,545 Neat. 281 00:13:35,546 --> 00:13:39,549 Well, it seems like lunch has come to a natural conclusion, 282 00:13:39,550 --> 00:13:42,685 so, how about we catch that Cowboys game? 283 00:13:42,686 --> 00:13:44,988 Well, that's my cue to leave, because I hate football. 284 00:13:44,989 --> 00:13:46,890 It was really nice to meet you, Walt. 285 00:13:46,891 --> 00:13:48,751 - Here you are, sexy. - Oh! 286 00:13:52,997 --> 00:13:55,031 I've been looking everywhere for you. 287 00:13:55,032 --> 00:13:57,400 Oh, Robert, this is not a good time. 288 00:13:57,401 --> 00:14:00,370 Uh, oh, maybe later, then. 289 00:14:00,371 --> 00:14:02,205 I'm up until 9:00. 290 00:14:02,206 --> 00:14:04,307 Ah. 291 00:14:05,709 --> 00:14:07,277 Dad, what's going on? 292 00:14:07,278 --> 00:14:09,445 Uh... yeah, 293 00:14:09,446 --> 00:14:12,215 is there something going on between you two? 294 00:14:12,216 --> 00:14:15,385 Well, we're-we're trying not to put any labels on it, Sid, 295 00:14:15,386 --> 00:14:18,021 you know, except for one... uh, "wow." 296 00:14:22,159 --> 00:14:24,394 This isn't what it looks like, Walt. 297 00:14:24,395 --> 00:14:26,596 Shouldn't you be saying that to my dad? 298 00:14:26,597 --> 00:14:30,366 This is not what it looks like, Sid. 299 00:14:30,367 --> 00:14:31,935 The hell it isn't! 300 00:14:31,936 --> 00:14:35,004 You two are running around, 'hind my back. 301 00:14:35,005 --> 00:14:37,040 Sid, what are you talking about? 302 00:14:37,041 --> 00:14:39,409 I mean, what-what do you care if I go out with Margaret? 303 00:14:39,410 --> 00:14:41,110 What-what does he care?! 304 00:14:41,111 --> 00:14:42,946 He cares because Margaret's his woman. 305 00:14:47,217 --> 00:14:51,087 That-that... that's, uh, impossible. 306 00:14:51,088 --> 00:14:54,490 - Why? - Why? Well, because Sid's... 307 00:14:54,491 --> 00:14:57,927 You say one more word, Robert, and I'll knock your block off! 308 00:14:57,928 --> 00:15:00,964 Don't you make me get up on this chair. 309 00:15:00,965 --> 00:15:03,666 We-we really should go, Robert. 310 00:15:03,667 --> 00:15:06,602 And Sid, bye. We'll always have Tokyo. 311 00:15:06,603 --> 00:15:08,171 Oh, no. 312 00:15:08,172 --> 00:15:10,106 You best go on and git! 313 00:15:10,107 --> 00:15:11,975 And don't you ever come back. 314 00:15:11,976 --> 00:15:13,476 You ruined my life. 315 00:15:13,477 --> 00:15:15,344 You ruined it! 316 00:15:17,381 --> 00:15:20,316 She'll come crawling back. 317 00:15:20,317 --> 00:15:22,919 They always do. 318 00:15:29,843 --> 00:15:31,844 Ooh! 319 00:15:37,650 --> 00:15:40,652 Okay. Took a while, but that's right and next? 320 00:15:40,653 --> 00:15:42,988 Ooh! Oh! 321 00:15:42,989 --> 00:15:45,390 Ooh! Ooh! 322 00:15:47,494 --> 00:15:49,495 Sorry, Hank. That was actually... 323 00:15:49,496 --> 00:15:51,463 Oh! I mean "F." 324 00:15:52,599 --> 00:15:55,534 Are you okay? 325 00:15:55,535 --> 00:15:57,636 Why do I keep smelling burnt hair? 326 00:15:59,372 --> 00:16:02,341 Seems like the sort of thing a real doctor would know. 327 00:16:04,377 --> 00:16:07,379 Come on, man. Let's keep going. 328 00:16:07,380 --> 00:16:10,849 Okay. Just 24 more to go. And next? 329 00:16:10,850 --> 00:16:12,117 Ooh! Ooh! 330 00:16:12,118 --> 00:16:13,852 Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh! 331 00:16:13,853 --> 00:16:16,221 All right, this is too much. I can't take it, man. 332 00:16:16,222 --> 00:16:17,789 Enough! 333 00:16:17,790 --> 00:16:19,625 Is that Pomeranian still alive? 334 00:16:19,626 --> 00:16:21,293 We got to go save that dog. 335 00:16:22,829 --> 00:16:25,430 You guys were trying to cheat on the eye exam? 336 00:16:27,033 --> 00:16:29,735 Well, neither of you will be getting a lollipop. 337 00:16:29,736 --> 00:16:32,371 Whoa, whoa, whoa. 338 00:16:32,372 --> 00:16:34,606 Can't you just pass me, man? 339 00:16:34,607 --> 00:16:36,241 Sorry. I took an oath. 340 00:16:36,242 --> 00:16:38,510 What if I gave you $200? 341 00:16:39,712 --> 00:16:41,780 Works for me. 342 00:16:43,883 --> 00:16:46,084 What about your "precious oath"? 343 00:16:46,085 --> 00:16:49,788 I oath the bank 100 grand in student loans. 344 00:16:49,789 --> 00:16:51,890 You're doing the right thing. 345 00:16:51,891 --> 00:16:54,393 You made this stallion very happy. 346 00:17:03,136 --> 00:17:04,570 I am so sorry 347 00:17:04,571 --> 00:17:07,272 about what just happened with Margaret, Dad. 348 00:17:07,273 --> 00:17:08,640 Are you okay? 349 00:17:08,641 --> 00:17:10,742 Oh, I'm... I'm-I'm-I'm fine. 350 00:17:10,743 --> 00:17:12,778 Uh, easy come, easy go. 351 00:17:12,779 --> 00:17:15,013 'Nother day, 'nother ho. 352 00:17:20,653 --> 00:17:22,487 Dad, you don't have to pretend. 353 00:17:22,488 --> 00:17:23,989 You can be honest with me. 354 00:17:25,124 --> 00:17:27,025 I'll be honest with you. 355 00:17:27,026 --> 00:17:29,161 I'm worried about you. That's why I'm really here. 356 00:17:29,162 --> 00:17:30,963 You never talk about your life. 357 00:17:30,964 --> 00:17:32,664 And are you happy? 358 00:17:32,665 --> 00:17:37,269 I... I am happy... Walt. 359 00:17:37,270 --> 00:17:38,670 Are you really? 360 00:17:38,671 --> 00:17:40,672 You just got cheated on. 361 00:17:40,673 --> 00:17:42,674 By the lower-half, half-Japanese woman 362 00:17:42,675 --> 00:17:45,610 who's the heir to the Japanese empire. 363 00:17:46,579 --> 00:17:49,081 Well, about all that... 364 00:17:49,082 --> 00:17:51,483 Um... 365 00:17:51,484 --> 00:17:53,485 I need to talk to you. 366 00:17:53,486 --> 00:17:55,487 I want to tell you something. 367 00:17:55,488 --> 00:17:59,024 Uh, you don't have to worry about me, 'cause I'm happy. 368 00:17:59,025 --> 00:18:03,061 I'm really happy. I mean, I think that I would be happier 369 00:18:03,062 --> 00:18:06,365 if you could see the real me, because I'm... 370 00:18:06,366 --> 00:18:08,300 Sorry. What'd you say? I... 371 00:18:08,301 --> 00:18:10,369 I'm... 372 00:18:10,370 --> 00:18:12,537 I'm sorry, Dad. I'm still not getting it. 373 00:18:12,538 --> 00:18:14,139 I... am... gay. 374 00:18:14,140 --> 00:18:15,641 Thanks for the newsflash, Sid. 375 00:18:15,642 --> 00:18:17,409 Oh! 376 00:18:22,348 --> 00:18:24,383 Walt, I, um... 377 00:18:24,384 --> 00:18:26,752 I've always been gay, and I'm... I'm really sorry 378 00:18:26,753 --> 00:18:29,655 that I kept it from you, but I... like ice dancing 379 00:18:29,656 --> 00:18:34,526 and musical theater and... making love to men. 380 00:18:34,527 --> 00:18:37,963 I suppose that last one's the main takeaway. 381 00:18:41,067 --> 00:18:43,435 Wow. 382 00:18:43,436 --> 00:18:45,437 My dad is gay. 383 00:18:45,438 --> 00:18:47,406 I have a gay dad. 384 00:18:47,407 --> 00:18:49,775 That explains a lot. 385 00:18:49,776 --> 00:18:51,710 This is awesome. 386 00:18:51,711 --> 00:18:54,379 Oh, I'm happy for you, Pop. 387 00:18:54,380 --> 00:18:56,648 Oh, thank you. I'm so glad. 388 00:18:56,649 --> 00:18:58,083 I... Oh, I'm so relieved. 389 00:18:58,084 --> 00:19:00,652 I should have done this years ago. 390 00:19:00,653 --> 00:19:03,922 But I must say, I was hoping for a little dramatics. 391 00:19:03,923 --> 00:19:07,359 Some-some tears or a slow clap. 392 00:19:10,863 --> 00:19:13,699 Well, it's a little late for that, Walter John. 393 00:19:13,700 --> 00:19:17,335 I'm glad you finally told me. 394 00:19:17,336 --> 00:19:21,807 - I love you, Dad. - Oh, I love you, son. 395 00:19:21,808 --> 00:19:24,276 Oh, Sid, I broke up with Robert. 396 00:19:24,277 --> 00:19:26,311 You're-you're the one that I really want. 397 00:19:26,312 --> 00:19:28,313 Come back with me to Japan. 398 00:19:30,950 --> 00:19:32,451 It's okay, Margaret. 399 00:19:32,452 --> 00:19:33,885 - I told him the truth... - Oh. 400 00:19:33,886 --> 00:19:35,887 ...and you buttoned your sweater wrong. 401 00:19:35,888 --> 00:19:37,589 Oh. Huh. Oops. 402 00:19:37,590 --> 00:19:40,859 So, Robert and I didn't really break up. 403 00:19:43,596 --> 00:19:45,664 I love this. 404 00:19:45,665 --> 00:19:48,033 I feel seen. 405 00:19:48,034 --> 00:19:50,535 You see the real me. 406 00:19:50,536 --> 00:19:53,805 - I can't see. - Brake, Hank! Brake! 407 00:19:59,846 --> 00:20:03,348 Well, I got my golf cart license back. 408 00:20:03,349 --> 00:20:06,551 You drove into a building, man. 409 00:20:06,552 --> 00:20:09,487 You're a stallion, Hank. 410 00:20:09,488 --> 00:20:11,989 - You guys okay? - Oh, they're fine, Margaret. 411 00:20:11,990 --> 00:20:15,860 Hank, Charlie, I have got some really big news. 412 00:20:15,861 --> 00:20:18,062 Now I have got even bigger news. 413 00:20:18,063 --> 00:20:20,197 Everybody, listen up. 414 00:20:20,198 --> 00:20:23,067 Now, this is very hard for me to say, 415 00:20:23,068 --> 00:20:25,303 but I've been living a lie. 416 00:20:25,304 --> 00:20:27,705 And the truth is... 417 00:20:27,706 --> 00:20:29,874 I can't see. 418 00:20:29,875 --> 00:20:32,009 I need glasses. 419 00:20:32,010 --> 00:20:34,378 There, I said it. 420 00:20:34,379 --> 00:20:36,380 I... 421 00:20:36,381 --> 00:20:37,970 need glasses. 422 00:20:40,275 --> 00:20:42,920 How brave is this guy? 423 00:20:49,094 --> 00:20:51,896 Are you friggin' kidding me? 424 00:20:56,898 --> 00:20:59,790 Walt, you have been through a lot this weekend. 425 00:20:59,791 --> 00:21:02,193 But, can you handle one more truth bomb? 426 00:21:02,194 --> 00:21:04,328 Another one? 427 00:21:04,329 --> 00:21:06,664 I actually do not like the Dallas Cowboys. 428 00:21:06,665 --> 00:21:08,165 Whoa! 429 00:21:08,166 --> 00:21:10,034 Well, now. 430 00:21:10,035 --> 00:21:11,869 That's gonna take some time to process. 431 00:21:11,870 --> 00:21:15,740 If it makes you feel any better, I like cowboys in general. 432 00:21:15,741 --> 00:21:18,142 I guess that's just gonna have to be enough. 433 00:21:18,143 --> 00:21:20,911 By the way, Dad, I'm loving your real look. 434 00:21:20,912 --> 00:21:22,546 Yeah, you dress just like the guy 435 00:21:22,547 --> 00:21:24,448 who runs the bake sale at our church. 436 00:21:24,449 --> 00:21:27,284 Wait a second. Is he...? 437 00:21:27,285 --> 00:21:29,666 Oh, honey. He is. 438 00:21:29,693 --> 00:21:37,064 Subtitle sync and corrections by awaqeded for www.addic7ed.com.