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Previously on The Affair:

2
00:00:05,403 --> 00:00:07,726
Mr. Solloway,
you, uh, got a second?

3
00:00:07,871 --> 00:00:10,122
- What's up?
- I was, um, wondering if you

4
00:00:10,149 --> 00:00:12,565
could take a look at this other
thing I've been working on.

5
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- You reapplying to Princeton?
- Maybe. I don't... I don't know.

6
00:00:15,198 --> 00:00:16,948
Mr. Solloway,
Principal Wilson's on the phone

7
00:00:16,975 --> 00:00:19,141
with the president of the board.
You shouldn't...

8
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- Are you firing me?
- What-what's going on?

9
00:00:21,523 --> 00:00:23,398
- Why are you here?
- I thought you should read this.

10
00:00:23,481 --> 00:00:25,398
Don't tell him I gave it to you.

11
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- I owe you an apology.
- No, no, I-I barged in.

12
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- So, you still my boss?
- I'm on probation.

13
00:00:31,689 --> 00:00:33,981
Next week, I have to
supplicate to the board.

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00:00:34,065 --> 00:00:35,648
Thank you for this.

15
00:00:35,731 --> 00:00:38,265
I'll read it over
and figure out what to do.

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I'm happy
to brainstorm with you.

17
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Forgot my history book.

18
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I got my quiz tomorrow, and...

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- Mom?
- We were just, um,

20
00:00:48,148 --> 00:00:49,439
discussing your Princeton essay.

21
00:00:49,523 --> 00:00:51,273
- You showed her?
- Princeton? Again?

22
00:00:51,357 --> 00:00:53,398
- He wants to go to the school.
- We made a decision.

23
00:00:53,425 --> 00:00:55,328
Just read the damn thing!

24
00:00:55,355 --> 00:00:58,312
Nellie, let's just admit
what this is actually about.

25
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You were never gonna let him
stay here for school.

26
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No one drives
all the way across the country

27
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just to see about a surfboard.

28
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Truth is I'm in love
with somebody else.

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I'm gonna tell her how I feel.
So I'm going home.

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I'm so glad that you guys
moved in here.

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The last people had
a very stagnant energy.

32
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But you...
your being is, like...

33
00:01:16,564 --> 00:01:18,606
it's a little...

34
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- It is?
- Yeah, I don't know.

35
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I-I guess we'll find out.

36
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I'm going to die.

37
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And I haven't really
made a single choice

38
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for myself.

39
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I am going to Joshua Tree.

40
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We go out there a couple times
a year to do a moon circle.

41
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- Do you want to come?
- I totally, totally don't.

42
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- Oh, okay.
- Okay?

43
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Cool.

44
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I have pancreatic cancer.

45
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- I am going to die.
- What do you want me to do?

46
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I told you,
I want to have a baby.

47
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If you really want
to do something for me,

48
00:01:48,815 --> 00:01:50,564
you can do that.

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www.subtitulamos.tv

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_

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Excuse me.

52
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Do you know where
I can find rolled oats?

53
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Aisle four, beside the granola.

54
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- Excuse me, can you...
- Are you making overnight oats?

55
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No. What are overnight oats?

56
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My sister turned me on to them.

57
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If you're like me,
a total wreck in the morning,

58
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it'll save your life.

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- Yeah?
- Yeah.

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It's only like five ingredients.

61
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- Okay.
- Rolled oats, almond milk,

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chia seed, peanut butter...

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Oh, shit.

64
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Chia seed, peanut butter,

65
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almond milk... maple syrup!

66
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And you need a mason jar.

67
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Do you have one?

68
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One with a really good top?

69
00:03:52,815 --> 00:03:54,265
- I think so.
- Excuse me. Could you

70
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please tell me where
to find the Medjool dates?

71
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Oh. Sorry, sweetheart.
What do you need?

72
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Medjool dates.

73
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I can't find them anywhere.

74
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Sure, sure. Aisle seven.

75
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So, the key is to mix
everything together...

76
00:04:12,065 --> 00:04:14,689
And can you tell me where
the pregnancy tests are, please?

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Aisle two.

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_

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Mom, why are you taking
so many pills?

80
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Um, they're vitamins,
and they're for Vik.

81
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I thought, if I organized them,
he might actually take them.

82
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They're cancer vitamins?

83
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I love that song. Turn it up.

84
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Actually, why don't you
turn it off?

85
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All right, you guys, come on.
Backpacks, lunches.

86
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Homework. Let's go.

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- Let's go.
- Hold on.

88
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- No. Come on.
- I'm going.

89
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- You're not going.
- Yes, I am!

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Can I talk to you?

91
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What's up?

92
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I took a pregnancy test
this morning.

93
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Why would you do that?

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Because I'm late.

95
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We were just at the doctor.
You're not pregnant.

96
00:05:45,232 --> 00:05:47,773
Yeah, I... well,
I know that now. I...

97
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Didn't you hear anything
that Dr. Roper said?

98
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Yeah.

99
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You're entering
menopause, Helen.

100
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That's why your period is late.

101
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You know, things can happen.

102
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It's not impossible.

103
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Janet Jackson was older than me.

104
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Don't you think I'm too young
to be in menopause?

105
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Don't you think
I'm too young to die?

106
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- Vik, wait.
- Kids, let's go!

107
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I'll make sure
he takes them, Mom.

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- Thanks, baby.
- Bye.

109
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Helen.

110
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Oh, my God, you scared me.
Hi.

111
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You want some?

112
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Yeah. Sure.

113
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I know you hate California.

114
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You have to admit,
we have better weed.

115
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When did I say
I hated California?

116
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I can just tell.

117
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You're one of those
East Coast snobs

118
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who just loves to act
like you're in exile out here.

119
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Oh, no. Where is that
cookbook your mother wrote?

120
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- It's in there.
- Yeah, but which one?

121
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See, the thing that you
transplants don't understand

122
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is that California is actually
the cradle of civilization.

123
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Uh, actually, I think that's
somewhere in the Middle East.

124
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Yeah, if you're talking
about patriarchal society.

125
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I'm talking about
matriarchal society.

126
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And you think that started here?

127
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Not right here.

128
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About 150 miles east,
in Joshua Tree.

129
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Sierra?

130
00:08:03,754 --> 00:08:06,606
You know nothing you're saying
is true, right?

131
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Such a cynic.

132
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I win.

133
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Oh, wait.

134
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No, I don't.

135
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You know, I wouldn't
have figured you

136
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for a solitaire type of girl.

137
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My mom taught me
when I was a kid

138
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so that I could keep myself
entertained when she was on set.

139
00:08:26,523 --> 00:08:29,148
I didn't really have
many friends my own age.

140
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That's why I'm such an old soul.

141
00:08:33,492 --> 00:08:35,486
No, you're not an old anything.

142
00:08:35,981 --> 00:08:39,283
Helen, I'm gonna
be 30 next year.

143
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No, you don't understand.

144
00:08:42,689 --> 00:08:46,481
Thirty is almost, like,
50 in actor years.

145
00:08:46,564 --> 00:08:49,107
Well, I'm almost, like,
50 in people years.

146
00:08:49,190 --> 00:08:50,898
Yeah, but you're still
really fuckable.

147
00:08:51,591 --> 00:08:54,574
I'm never gonna be that fuckable
when I'm your age.

148
00:08:55,231 --> 00:08:57,148
What time is it?

149
00:08:57,175 --> 00:08:58,315
I don't know.

150
00:08:58,398 --> 00:09:00,335
Alexa, what time is it?

151
00:09:00,362 --> 00:09:01,940
The time is 11:04 a.m.

152
00:09:02,370 --> 00:09:04,523
Oh, shit. I gotta get an Uber.

153
00:09:04,606 --> 00:09:06,065
Where you going?

154
00:09:06,612 --> 00:09:08,070
To Joshua Tree.

155
00:09:08,097 --> 00:09:09,689
To my women's moon circle.

156
00:09:09,773 --> 00:09:11,107
I invited you, remember?

157
00:09:11,190 --> 00:09:12,564
You kind of spat in my face.

158
00:09:13,940 --> 00:09:15,761
Yeah, I'm sorry about that.

159
00:09:15,854 --> 00:09:16,815
It's fine.

160
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It's too bad, though.

161
00:09:19,439 --> 00:09:21,107
I mean, I just had
this intuition

162
00:09:21,190 --> 00:09:23,523
that you really needed
some guidance, but...

163
00:09:30,709 --> 00:09:32,436
_

164
00:09:32,463 --> 00:09:33,505
_

165
00:09:39,023 --> 00:09:41,023
What is a moon circle, exactly?

166
00:09:42,439 --> 00:09:44,315
New moons represent beginnings.

167
00:09:44,398 --> 00:09:48,176
It's a time for planting seeds
and setting intentions,

168
00:09:48,207 --> 00:09:52,816
and then committing to behaviors
to help us manifest them.

169
00:09:52,871 --> 00:09:55,023
And I'm really looking
forward to this one,

170
00:09:55,107 --> 00:09:56,723
because Gaelle
is going to be there.

171
00:09:56,750 --> 00:09:58,000
Who's Gaelle?

172
00:09:58,238 --> 00:09:59,742
She's my guru.

173
00:09:59,769 --> 00:10:01,190
She's a healer.

174
00:10:01,273 --> 00:10:02,981
She's a true gift.

175
00:10:03,065 --> 00:10:05,107
I mean, my work with her
has been so transformative,

176
00:10:05,134 --> 00:10:07,043
I don't even see
my therapist anymore.

177
00:10:12,284 --> 00:10:13,678
Fuck it.

178
00:10:16,108 --> 00:10:17,232
I'll go.

179
00:10:18,129 --> 00:10:20,232
- For real?
- For real.

180
00:10:21,315 --> 00:10:23,301
Oh, my God. Awesome.

181
00:10:24,778 --> 00:10:27,439
You sure Vik
won't mind us borrowing his car?

182
00:10:27,523 --> 00:10:31,074
Um, he might, but I don't
particularly care at the moment.

183
00:10:33,023 --> 00:10:35,232
What kind of music do you like?

184
00:10:35,315 --> 00:10:38,291
Oh, I think probably nothing
that you would like.

185
00:10:38,572 --> 00:10:39,856
Try me.

186
00:10:40,541 --> 00:10:42,689
Uh, I don't know.
I like rock music.

187
00:10:42,773 --> 00:10:44,273
I like some folk music.

188
00:10:44,357 --> 00:10:45,357
Patti Smith?

189
00:10:46,080 --> 00:10:47,236
Sure.

190
00:10:48,228 --> 00:10:50,481
She's my favorite
when I'm super depressed.

191
00:10:50,814 --> 00:10:54,481
Probably listened to this album
like 500 times in the past week.

192
00:10:54,564 --> 00:10:56,713
Why were you super depressed?

193
00:10:59,564 --> 00:11:02,119
I fucked a married man.

194
00:11:02,898 --> 00:11:06,023
I'm really annoyed with myself

195
00:11:06,107 --> 00:11:09,439
because I've done it before,
and it never ends well for me.

196
00:11:09,833 --> 00:11:11,630
I see.

197
00:11:11,898 --> 00:11:15,036
And I even know his wife,
and I...

198
00:11:15,856 --> 00:11:18,898
I really like his wife, so...

199
00:11:19,612 --> 00:11:22,481
- it was a stupid thing to do.
- Why did you do it?

200
00:11:22,564 --> 00:11:24,439
My mom broke up
like two marriages,

201
00:11:24,523 --> 00:11:27,981
so I guess I just always thought
that's how you vet a man,

202
00:11:28,065 --> 00:11:30,107
like how you know
if he's stable or not.

203
00:11:30,190 --> 00:11:32,648
You mean, if he's married
to someone else?

204
00:11:33,161 --> 00:11:36,357
Yeah, like, that's how you can tell
if he's serious about commitment.

205
00:11:36,384 --> 00:11:38,468
That's what my mom always said.

206
00:11:38,606 --> 00:11:39,815
You're gonna think
I'm full of it,

207
00:11:39,898 --> 00:11:42,232
but I wish I had your life.

208
00:11:45,074 --> 00:11:46,491
No, you don't.

209
00:11:46,518 --> 00:11:47,856
No, I'm serious.

210
00:11:47,940 --> 00:11:50,198
I would so much rather be you.

211
00:11:50,667 --> 00:11:52,439
I mean, look at my life.

212
00:11:52,878 --> 00:11:54,107
Yeah?

213
00:11:54,190 --> 00:11:58,126
Literally, the only
currency that I have is my...

214
00:11:58,727 --> 00:12:02,306
youth or my sex or whatever.

215
00:12:03,523 --> 00:12:04,977
But you...

216
00:12:06,524 --> 00:12:08,271
you, like, have it all.

217
00:12:09,204 --> 00:12:10,751
No, you're...

218
00:12:12,579 --> 00:12:16,564
You're, like, this smart,
beautiful, sophisticated woman.

219
00:12:16,648 --> 00:12:17,940
You've made all
the right choices.

220
00:12:18,023 --> 00:12:19,981
You have...

221
00:12:20,065 --> 00:12:21,023
I mean, you don't have men

222
00:12:21,107 --> 00:12:22,731
chewing you up
and spitting you out.

223
00:12:22,815 --> 00:12:26,315
You have a family and Vik and...

224
00:12:26,398 --> 00:12:29,264
I mean, you have a whole world
that needs you.

225
00:12:29,291 --> 00:12:32,541
Like, literally
couldn't live without you.

226
00:12:33,018 --> 00:12:34,809
How do I get that?

227
00:12:50,677 --> 00:12:51,760
See?

228
00:12:53,125 --> 00:12:54,750
Told you.

229
00:12:54,949 --> 00:12:56,032
Pretty great, right?

230
00:12:58,649 --> 00:13:00,317
Come on.

231
00:13:02,953 --> 00:13:06,120
We're gonna miss the
Blessing of the Eagle Feather.

232
00:13:11,815 --> 00:13:16,648
I want you all to take
a big, deep breath.

233
00:13:16,675 --> 00:13:21,081
We've made it to the new moon
in tropical Libra.

234
00:13:21,402 --> 00:13:23,564
We call upon this new moon,
our cosmic mother...

235
00:13:23,648 --> 00:13:25,065
That's Gaelle?

236
00:13:25,148 --> 00:13:27,984
- Yeah. Isn't she wonderful?
- You said she was a guru.

237
00:13:28,011 --> 00:13:29,357
She is.

238
00:13:29,439 --> 00:13:30,689
She's a teenager.

239
00:13:30,773 --> 00:13:33,222
Well, she was an Incan princess
in a past life.

240
00:13:33,249 --> 00:13:35,439
Help us uncover
our first selves...

241
00:13:35,523 --> 00:13:38,648
I don't care if you don't
believe me. It's true.

242
00:13:39,359 --> 00:13:41,484
We call upon fire...

243
00:13:41,511 --> 00:13:43,439
Is she even allowed
to wear that thing?

244
00:13:43,523 --> 00:13:45,148
- What do you mean?
- I mean,

245
00:13:45,232 --> 00:13:46,726
it's kind of
politically incorrect.

246
00:13:46,753 --> 00:13:48,023
I mean, how many birds

247
00:13:48,107 --> 00:13:49,981
- had to die to make...
- Okay, Helen. Shh.

248
00:13:50,065 --> 00:13:54,023
Let its great power
transmute our negative,

249
00:13:54,349 --> 00:13:56,223
lower energies.

250
00:13:56,532 --> 00:14:01,009
And help us move forward
into positivity and light.

251
00:14:04,564 --> 00:14:07,357
For people whose chakras
are particularly blocked,

252
00:14:07,384 --> 00:14:09,419
the sage is very powerful.

253
00:14:09,446 --> 00:14:10,981
I'm allergic to sage.

254
00:14:11,306 --> 00:14:12,251
It's...

255
00:14:13,573 --> 00:14:15,947
It's Helen, right?

256
00:14:16,493 --> 00:14:17,439
You're lucky the universe

257
00:14:17,523 --> 00:14:20,107
chose to partner you
with Sierra here.

258
00:14:20,626 --> 00:14:21,856
I've rarely met a sister

259
00:14:21,940 --> 00:14:24,398
whose sacral chakra
is more aligned.

260
00:14:52,783 --> 00:14:54,242
Get a yurt!

261
00:15:01,940 --> 00:15:04,065
Thank you for holding space.

262
00:15:04,784 --> 00:15:07,815
Thank you for receiving light.

263
00:15:22,093 --> 00:15:26,539
Oh, my God, I hate having to wear
clothes all the time. Don't you?

264
00:15:28,065 --> 00:15:30,953
That's what I love
about being out here.

265
00:15:31,000 --> 00:15:33,979
There's not a man in sight.
It's so liberating.

266
00:15:36,989 --> 00:15:38,572
So, what's the, um...

267
00:15:38,648 --> 00:15:40,357
What's on the, uh...

268
00:15:40,439 --> 00:15:42,323
What are we doing tonight?

269
00:15:42,350 --> 00:15:44,606
Well, I don't know exactly.

270
00:15:45,492 --> 00:15:47,738
With Gaelle,
anything could happen,

271
00:15:47,765 --> 00:15:50,398
but we usually have a banquet,

272
00:15:50,652 --> 00:15:52,386
and then we do the moon circle.

273
00:15:52,413 --> 00:15:53,413
Cool.

274
00:15:55,226 --> 00:15:56,898
This...

275
00:15:56,981 --> 00:16:00,394
is for you to wear to dinner.

276
00:16:00,421 --> 00:16:02,851
Oh, uh, do I have to?

277
00:16:03,606 --> 00:16:05,357
Well, no, you don't have to,

278
00:16:05,439 --> 00:16:07,481
but I don't know
how you expect to have

279
00:16:07,564 --> 00:16:09,190
a transformative experience

280
00:16:09,273 --> 00:16:11,315
if you don't at least try
to participate.

281
00:16:14,450 --> 00:16:15,617
What is that?

282
00:16:15,843 --> 00:16:17,238
That's the dinner gong.

283
00:16:17,265 --> 00:16:19,190
Gaelle loves that thing.

284
00:16:19,633 --> 00:16:20,843
So, um...

285
00:16:22,210 --> 00:16:25,785
what's up with the make-out sesh
with you and Gaelle?

286
00:16:25,812 --> 00:16:27,940
Oh. Yeah, there's a little more

287
00:16:28,023 --> 00:16:30,148
to that story
than I initially let on.

288
00:16:30,232 --> 00:16:31,523
Is she your girlfriend?

289
00:16:31,606 --> 00:16:35,759
No. No, I mean,
she's not... not now.

290
00:16:35,786 --> 00:16:37,981
She was, briefly,
for like a second.

291
00:16:38,595 --> 00:16:40,345
So you're bi?

292
00:16:40,592 --> 00:16:42,160
I don't like labels.

293
00:16:42,187 --> 00:16:43,937
Well, no, of course you don't.

294
00:16:46,481 --> 00:16:49,107
Um, I should call Vik
and tell him

295
00:16:49,190 --> 00:16:50,773
I'm not going to be home.

296
00:16:51,043 --> 00:16:52,751
How is Vik?

297
00:16:53,052 --> 00:16:54,481
He's fine.

298
00:16:54,888 --> 00:16:57,773
I just... I-I saw him the other
day, and he seemed a little tired.

299
00:16:57,856 --> 00:16:59,232
Well, he has a huge job, so...

300
00:17:00,739 --> 00:17:02,273
Hi. It's me.

301
00:17:02,357 --> 00:17:04,606
I'm just calling to say
that I'm not coming home.

302
00:17:05,755 --> 00:17:08,423
And the kids are with Noah,
so you're on your own.

303
00:17:08,450 --> 00:17:11,773
Uh, there's some of your mom's
baingan bharta in the freezer.

304
00:17:12,286 --> 00:17:14,161
Okay. Bye.

305
00:17:16,604 --> 00:17:18,105
Are you really not
gonna wear that?

306
00:17:18,132 --> 00:17:19,757
Because you're gonna be
the only one.

307
00:17:21,435 --> 00:17:22,892
Okay, fine.

308
00:17:31,689 --> 00:17:35,232
So... what about you?

309
00:17:36,728 --> 00:17:38,357
What about me?

310
00:17:38,611 --> 00:17:40,153
Do you only sleep with men?

311
00:17:40,721 --> 00:17:43,013
Um, mostly.

312
00:17:44,821 --> 00:17:46,038
Say more.

313
00:17:51,232 --> 00:17:54,148
I forgot to tell you
about the pièce de résistance.

314
00:17:54,232 --> 00:17:57,256
Later tonight, we're going
to a sensory deprivation tank.

315
00:17:57,283 --> 00:17:58,190
A what?

316
00:17:58,603 --> 00:18:01,148
Seriously, you don't know what
a sensory deprivation tank is?

317
00:18:01,232 --> 00:18:02,048
Should I?

318
00:18:02,075 --> 00:18:03,940
Oh, my God. Helen, you're gonna love it.

319
00:18:04,023 --> 00:18:06,273
The water is warmed to
your exact body temperature,

320
00:18:06,357 --> 00:18:08,898
and it's like this big womb,

321
00:18:08,981 --> 00:18:11,273
and you just kind of float
in this mystical cocoon,

322
00:18:11,357 --> 00:18:13,499
and it's, like,
totally transformative.

323
00:18:13,651 --> 00:18:15,734
You use that word a lot.

324
00:18:15,819 --> 00:18:18,357
Yeah, I'm just
noticing that, too.

325
00:18:18,913 --> 00:18:20,773
Okay, ladies,
hand over your fears

326
00:18:20,856 --> 00:18:23,155
that you wrote down.

327
00:18:25,106 --> 00:18:26,350
Okay.

328
00:18:27,724 --> 00:18:30,015
Okay, do I have a card
from everybody?

329
00:18:35,879 --> 00:18:40,045
Now, the first step
in validating our narratives

330
00:18:40,072 --> 00:18:42,736
is owning what scares us.

331
00:18:43,244 --> 00:18:46,507
As you all know,
a new moon is an ideal time

332
00:18:46,534 --> 00:18:49,741
for clearing psychic debris
that has accumulated

333
00:18:49,768 --> 00:18:51,856
over the previous lunation.

334
00:18:52,356 --> 00:18:54,815
You have all trusted
your current blockages

335
00:18:54,842 --> 00:18:56,050
to this sisterhood.

336
00:18:56,398 --> 00:18:59,893
Now, together, we will
dissolve them with love.

337
00:19:02,058 --> 00:19:03,183
Okay.

338
00:19:08,398 --> 00:19:10,148
- I'm sorry.
- Read it!

339
00:19:10,232 --> 00:19:11,731
What does it say?

340
00:19:11,815 --> 00:19:13,940
- Read it.
- Okay, okay.

341
00:19:14,023 --> 00:19:16,827
"My boyfriend asked me
to try anal with him last week."

342
00:19:16,854 --> 00:19:18,756
And then there's a frowny face

343
00:19:18,783 --> 00:19:20,807
with X's for eyes.

344
00:19:21,836 --> 00:19:24,002
Ladies, suggestions?

345
00:19:26,689 --> 00:19:27,961
Butt plugs.

346
00:19:28,304 --> 00:19:29,648
The glass kind.

347
00:19:29,731 --> 00:19:31,232
They're tiny.
They're not offensive.

348
00:19:31,315 --> 00:19:33,190
I mean, at first, I was like,
"Absolutely not.

349
00:19:33,273 --> 00:19:34,689
No way. Not happening."

350
00:19:34,773 --> 00:19:37,190
But they are
a gateway drug to anal.

351
00:19:37,437 --> 00:19:39,775
What if I don't want
a gateway drug to anal?

352
00:19:39,802 --> 00:19:40,981
Oh, you do.

353
00:19:41,314 --> 00:19:42,855
You should listen to the lady.

354
00:19:44,724 --> 00:19:45,705
Okay.

355
00:19:47,273 --> 00:19:49,606
Next, let's see.

356
00:19:49,689 --> 00:19:51,273
"I am afraid having children

357
00:19:51,357 --> 00:19:54,190
is going to steal
my creative spirit.

358
00:19:54,273 --> 00:19:56,461
I still have so much
I want to accomplish.

359
00:19:56,488 --> 00:19:58,232
What if I wake up an old woman

360
00:19:58,315 --> 00:20:00,648
and realize I gave up
all my energy

361
00:20:00,731 --> 00:20:02,439
to my children?"

362
00:20:03,546 --> 00:20:04,922
Fuck.

363
00:20:05,812 --> 00:20:07,232
That...

364
00:20:07,573 --> 00:20:09,156
Anyone?

365
00:20:10,898 --> 00:20:12,107
Okay.

366
00:20:12,315 --> 00:20:14,748
Guys, clearly that's mine.

367
00:20:16,357 --> 00:20:19,148
I'm, like, freaking out.

368
00:20:19,607 --> 00:20:21,398
Like, seriously, like,
I don't even know...

369
00:20:21,481 --> 00:20:23,357
I'm not prepared for this.

370
00:20:23,439 --> 00:20:25,523
Like, what if this
ruins my life?

371
00:20:25,606 --> 00:20:29,107
Like, I really fucking
like my life, you know?

372
00:20:30,963 --> 00:20:34,357
The answer already exists
in you, Cass.

373
00:20:36,248 --> 00:20:40,076
It will come if you
let yourself surrender.

374
00:20:40,325 --> 00:20:42,450
I am surrendering.

375
00:20:43,190 --> 00:20:44,853
Surrender more.

376
00:20:44,880 --> 00:20:46,398
Okay, Gaelle,

377
00:20:46,481 --> 00:20:49,065
with all due respect,
you have never been pregnant,

378
00:20:49,148 --> 00:20:51,648
and you have no fucking clue
what this feels like.

379
00:20:51,731 --> 00:20:53,481
- Calm down, Cass!
- Guys, don't fight.

380
00:20:53,564 --> 00:20:55,107
I know what it feels like.

381
00:20:57,076 --> 00:20:58,951
I have four kids.

382
00:20:58,989 --> 00:21:00,012
Geez.

383
00:21:01,232 --> 00:21:03,023
And I do... I remember
being terrified

384
00:21:03,107 --> 00:21:04,731
before my first daughter
was born.

385
00:21:04,815 --> 00:21:07,366
My husband said I was acting
like a caged animal.

386
00:21:07,393 --> 00:21:10,393
Yes, that's exactly how I feel.

387
00:21:12,789 --> 00:21:14,497
What do you do?

388
00:21:14,524 --> 00:21:16,841
I'm a designer.
I make furniture.

389
00:21:16,868 --> 00:21:19,273
Ah. I love design.

390
00:21:19,716 --> 00:21:21,466
I used to have a shop.

391
00:21:21,493 --> 00:21:22,398
Where?

392
00:21:22,864 --> 00:21:24,531
In Brooklyn.

393
00:21:25,815 --> 00:21:27,704
It was a great shop.

394
00:21:28,523 --> 00:21:30,898
But, you know, um,
I can say this.

395
00:21:30,981 --> 00:21:34,065
Your life is about
to completely change.

396
00:21:34,148 --> 00:21:35,065
- Fuck.
- No, but not

397
00:21:35,148 --> 00:21:36,107
in the way you think.

398
00:21:36,190 --> 00:21:38,669
It-it doesn't get smaller.

399
00:21:38,696 --> 00:21:40,564
It gets larger.

400
00:21:41,266 --> 00:21:42,689
How?

401
00:21:42,773 --> 00:21:46,981
Okay, when... right after I had
my first daughter, Whitney,

402
00:21:47,065 --> 00:21:50,662
I had this moment,
and I remember it very clearly.

403
00:21:50,889 --> 00:21:53,731
I was looking
at her little face, and, um,

404
00:21:53,815 --> 00:21:57,496
it suddenly occurred to me
that she was going to...

405
00:21:57,738 --> 00:21:59,523
outlive me.

406
00:21:59,606 --> 00:22:01,856
Her life was going
to extend beyond mine,

407
00:22:01,940 --> 00:22:04,981
and I was finite.

408
00:22:05,065 --> 00:22:08,190
You know, really just dust
in the fucking wind.

409
00:22:08,725 --> 00:22:11,107
And so...

410
00:22:11,190 --> 00:22:14,807
I just said to myself,
"Okay, then, if that's true,

411
00:22:14,834 --> 00:22:17,727
what am I going to do
with my one

412
00:22:17,754 --> 00:22:19,898
wild and precious life?"

413
00:22:21,903 --> 00:22:23,195
Mary Oliver.

414
00:22:25,470 --> 00:22:27,788
You guys don't know Mary Oliver?

415
00:22:27,815 --> 00:22:30,773
Okay, but what was the answer?
Like, what did you do?

416
00:22:30,856 --> 00:22:32,357
Well, I had more children.

417
00:22:32,439 --> 00:22:33,773
Oh, that's nice.

418
00:22:33,856 --> 00:22:35,315
But I love being a mother.

419
00:22:35,398 --> 00:22:37,286
And not everybody does,
and that's okay.

420
00:22:37,313 --> 00:22:38,357
I mean, you don't have to give

421
00:22:38,439 --> 00:22:39,977
everything over
to this little person.

422
00:22:40,004 --> 00:22:42,470
You just have to make
some room for her. Or him.

423
00:22:42,617 --> 00:22:43,492
It's a girl.

424
00:22:46,830 --> 00:22:48,862
The heart actually does expand.

425
00:22:48,889 --> 00:22:51,264
I-I have no idea how it does it,

426
00:22:51,291 --> 00:22:53,648
but it seems to always be able
to make room for children.

427
00:22:56,488 --> 00:22:58,021
Helen...

428
00:22:58,879 --> 00:23:01,564
I'm passing my guru baton
to you this evening.

429
00:23:01,648 --> 00:23:03,107
Oh, please don't.

430
00:23:03,190 --> 00:23:04,357
I...

431
00:23:05,254 --> 00:23:06,398
I have to.

432
00:23:06,801 --> 00:23:08,593
Tonight belongs to you.

433
00:23:14,898 --> 00:23:16,433
What happens if
my husband loves a baby

434
00:23:16,460 --> 00:23:17,981
- more than he loves me?
- Well, he won't.

435
00:23:18,065 --> 00:23:19,606
And my boyfriend
wants to get pregnant.

436
00:23:19,689 --> 00:23:21,796
I'm not so sure about him,

437
00:23:21,823 --> 00:23:24,148
but I want to really have a kid,
so should I just do it?

438
00:23:24,232 --> 00:23:25,232
- No.
- No.

439
00:23:25,315 --> 00:23:26,648
Don't do that.

440
00:23:26,731 --> 00:23:28,606
Like, what if I don't
find a man in time?

441
00:23:28,689 --> 00:23:30,357
Should I just do it alone?

442
00:23:30,439 --> 00:23:32,357
You can, but it's very hard.

443
00:23:32,439 --> 00:23:34,398
But, I mean, that's why you guys
have each other, right?

444
00:23:34,481 --> 00:23:35,815
Why you have this group?

445
00:23:37,065 --> 00:23:38,981
Look, I want to be
honest with you.

446
00:23:39,065 --> 00:23:41,190
No matter how many new moons

447
00:23:41,273 --> 00:23:44,246
or tropical Libras
you circle under,

448
00:23:44,273 --> 00:23:46,687
the only way out of this thing
is through it.

449
00:23:46,757 --> 00:23:50,940
I mean, and you can talk to
astrologers or gurus or shamans,

450
00:23:51,023 --> 00:23:52,940
but the only thing
that really works

451
00:23:53,023 --> 00:23:55,855
is living and making choices
and making mistakes,

452
00:23:55,882 --> 00:23:58,546
and then eventually,
you get old enough...

453
00:23:59,440 --> 00:24:01,814
and you start
to figure shit out.

454
00:24:06,773 --> 00:24:10,351
I thought we were going
to a sensory derivation bank.

455
00:24:10,906 --> 00:24:13,865
A sensory deprivation tank?

456
00:24:16,471 --> 00:24:18,012
What did I say?

457
00:24:18,356 --> 00:24:20,564
I think maybe we should
take that away from you.

458
00:24:20,906 --> 00:24:24,239
Actually, be careful, 'cause
sometimes Gaelle's stuff is laced.

459
00:24:27,632 --> 00:24:29,132
Oh, well.

460
00:24:34,731 --> 00:24:38,403
So, what was your fear
that you wrote on the card?

461
00:24:41,200 --> 00:24:43,689
I couldn't think of one.

462
00:24:46,148 --> 00:24:48,536
Your life is so perfect
that you don't have any fears?

463
00:24:49,418 --> 00:24:52,023
My life is a total
fucking wreck.

464
00:24:58,098 --> 00:25:00,708
I thought I was pregnant
this morning.

465
00:25:01,215 --> 00:25:02,587
Oh, my God. Are you?

466
00:25:02,614 --> 00:25:05,318
No. I'm in menopause.

467
00:25:08,091 --> 00:25:10,268
- That's a bummer.
- Is it?

468
00:25:11,745 --> 00:25:13,579
I don't know. Is it?

469
00:25:14,061 --> 00:25:16,103
I mean, do you want more kids?

470
00:25:16,130 --> 00:25:17,547
You know...

471
00:25:18,689 --> 00:25:20,966
I have four children.

472
00:25:22,398 --> 00:25:24,689
I don't actually want
another baby.

473
00:25:24,773 --> 00:25:27,981
I just... you know,
but Vik wanted it.

474
00:25:28,065 --> 00:25:32,773
And I thought that I
should give that to him.

475
00:25:32,856 --> 00:25:36,167
But this whole day,
I've been thinking about it,

476
00:25:36,198 --> 00:25:40,815
and I've been wondering, how
many of my children did I want?

477
00:25:42,689 --> 00:25:47,398
Was it for me,
or was it for Noah?

478
00:25:47,856 --> 00:25:50,607
- Who's Noah?
- My first husband.

479
00:25:52,212 --> 00:25:53,815
I mean, all my life,

480
00:25:53,898 --> 00:25:55,989
I've been feeling...
I don't know how to say this.

481
00:25:56,016 --> 00:25:57,898
I've been feeling needed.

482
00:25:57,981 --> 00:26:00,815
By men, by my children.

483
00:26:01,219 --> 00:26:03,439
You know, I remember when Noah
and I first got together,

484
00:26:03,523 --> 00:26:06,099
his mother had just died,
and-and-and...

485
00:26:06,126 --> 00:26:08,232
I remember how much
he wanted me,

486
00:26:08,315 --> 00:26:12,232
in this kind of really
desperate sort of way.

487
00:26:12,315 --> 00:26:14,107
And he would just, like,
climb into bed with me

488
00:26:14,190 --> 00:26:17,251
and need to fuck me, to feel...

489
00:26:18,328 --> 00:26:20,516
connected, or...

490
00:26:21,133 --> 00:26:24,052
safe or cared for.

491
00:26:24,079 --> 00:26:25,439
I don't know, and I-I was...

492
00:26:25,523 --> 00:26:29,430
I was happy to give that
to him when I was young,

493
00:26:29,457 --> 00:26:32,524
because I thought that that's
what I was supposed to do.

494
00:26:36,696 --> 00:26:40,981
And then my children came along,
and they're just all need.

495
00:26:41,065 --> 00:26:43,302
You know, they're like
little, tiny,

496
00:26:43,329 --> 00:26:46,856
little, walking balls of need.

497
00:26:46,940 --> 00:26:51,532
And men... men don't understand.

498
00:26:51,594 --> 00:26:54,266
I mean, they have
this notion of...

499
00:26:54,293 --> 00:26:58,496
of-of what bringing a child
into their lives would mean, but...

500
00:26:59,801 --> 00:27:01,614
they only do
a fraction of the work,

501
00:27:01,689 --> 00:27:04,527
and the rest is, like, up to us.

502
00:27:05,433 --> 00:27:08,564
I think I'm...

503
00:27:09,051 --> 00:27:11,815
I think I'm relieved
to finally be in menopause,

504
00:27:11,898 --> 00:27:14,731
because I will never...

505
00:27:14,815 --> 00:27:17,648
have to make a decision
like that again.

506
00:27:18,271 --> 00:27:22,146
You mean whether or not
to give a man what he wants?

507
00:27:25,661 --> 00:27:27,116
Yes.

508
00:27:30,965 --> 00:27:32,439
Yeah. Fuck.

509
00:27:32,523 --> 00:27:33,689
Yeah.

510
00:27:33,773 --> 00:27:35,731
I think maybe that's it.

511
00:27:40,689 --> 00:27:42,232
You know why...

512
00:27:42,315 --> 00:27:44,898
You know why I like
having sex with women?

513
00:27:45,523 --> 00:27:47,481
No. Why?

514
00:27:47,564 --> 00:27:51,007
Because I find that sex
with women is just...

515
00:27:51,830 --> 00:27:53,913
so much more intimate.

516
00:27:54,476 --> 00:27:55,689
You know?

517
00:27:56,257 --> 00:27:59,632
Because I can relate to their struggles,
because they're my struggles.

518
00:28:00,940 --> 00:28:04,981
And so, when I see
a woman there naked

519
00:28:05,065 --> 00:28:09,138
and confident
and hungry for orgasm,

520
00:28:10,041 --> 00:28:12,832
it's like this
primal admiration.

521
00:28:14,731 --> 00:28:16,398
It's very sexy.

522
00:28:18,005 --> 00:28:19,414
And also,

523
00:28:20,122 --> 00:28:22,422
usually with women...

524
00:28:23,062 --> 00:28:26,604
I feel like I have
a lot more control.

525
00:28:28,812 --> 00:28:30,315
And, um...

526
00:28:30,398 --> 00:28:33,359
I don't know,
control is really hot.

527
00:29:47,856 --> 00:29:50,065
Listen, can I give you
some advice?

528
00:29:51,148 --> 00:29:52,486
Yeah, okay.

529
00:29:56,536 --> 00:29:59,077
Lay off the married guys.

530
00:29:59,354 --> 00:30:00,523
Yeah, I know.

531
00:30:00,606 --> 00:30:02,398
You don't, really,
because you're not married.

532
00:30:02,481 --> 00:30:04,337
You've never been married,
so you couldn't know.

533
00:30:04,364 --> 00:30:06,364
And that's okay, but...

534
00:30:07,232 --> 00:30:09,648
When you sleep
with a married man,

535
00:30:09,731 --> 00:30:13,023
it's not just him.

536
00:30:13,107 --> 00:30:15,523
There's a whole constellation
of people behind him,

537
00:30:15,606 --> 00:30:17,315
and it takes...

538
00:30:17,398 --> 00:30:19,590
years to build trust
in a marriage.

539
00:30:19,617 --> 00:30:21,856
And when you sleep
with someone's husband,

540
00:30:21,940 --> 00:30:23,232
it's not just a moment.

541
00:30:23,315 --> 00:30:25,648
It's years of his life,
and hers,

542
00:30:25,731 --> 00:30:28,940
and the promise they made to
each other and-and their kids,

543
00:30:29,023 --> 00:30:31,107
and it's everything.

544
00:30:31,487 --> 00:30:33,570
And you're just shitting
all over it.

545
00:30:35,947 --> 00:30:37,531
Fuck.

546
00:30:47,759 --> 00:30:50,176
The deprivation tank is here?

547
00:30:50,203 --> 00:30:51,476
Yeah.

548
00:30:55,856 --> 00:30:59,051
I want to have
four kids one day, too.

549
00:32:01,981 --> 00:32:03,689
- Hey.
- No.

550
00:32:05,351 --> 00:32:07,018
Sorry.

551
00:32:14,773 --> 00:32:16,357
Hey, Helen.

552
00:32:16,439 --> 00:32:17,398
There you are.

553
00:32:17,481 --> 00:32:18,815
Oh, my God, I found it.

554
00:32:18,898 --> 00:32:21,564
I found the tank.
Come on. Let's go.

555
00:33:51,276 --> 00:33:52,773
Helen.

556
00:33:52,856 --> 00:33:54,023
Helen, wait.

557
00:33:54,107 --> 00:33:56,232
Where are you going?

558
00:34:15,323 --> 00:34:16,854
Helen.

559
00:34:17,606 --> 00:34:20,481
What are you doing here? I-I thought
you were in the desert tonight.

560
00:34:26,199 --> 00:34:27,699
What's wrong?

561
00:34:27,987 --> 00:34:29,112
Come here.

562
00:34:32,255 --> 00:34:33,065
What is it?

563
00:34:33,148 --> 00:34:34,940
I don't want you to die.

564
00:34:38,529 --> 00:34:40,320
I don't want to die, either.

565
00:35:01,107 --> 00:35:02,940
Don't die.

566
00:35:03,023 --> 00:35:04,898
Please don't die.

567
00:35:08,439 --> 00:35:09,981
- I won't.
- Promise me.

568
00:35:10,065 --> 00:35:11,023
I promise.

569
00:35:14,940 --> 00:35:16,648
I promise.

570
00:36:03,588 --> 00:36:04,765
_

571
00:36:04,792 --> 00:36:06,838
- Trevor, straighten up.
- I am.

572
00:36:06,870 --> 00:36:09,107
- No, you're not!
- Well, I'm trying.

573
00:36:09,331 --> 00:36:11,747
Holy shit, stop!
Brake! Brake!

574
00:36:15,357 --> 00:36:17,107
This sucks.

575
00:36:19,228 --> 00:36:21,021
Come on. I thought
you'd enjoy this.

576
00:36:21,048 --> 00:36:21,879
Why?

577
00:36:21,940 --> 00:36:24,576
Well, your first driving lesson.
I don't know.

578
00:36:24,603 --> 00:36:26,186
This isn't my first.

579
00:36:26,213 --> 00:36:28,981
Vik lets me back Mom's car
out of the driveway sometimes.

580
00:36:29,065 --> 00:36:30,856
Yeah, I know, but, you know,

581
00:36:30,940 --> 00:36:33,514
here you're learning how
to steer and park and...

582
00:36:33,541 --> 00:36:35,332
Whatever.

583
00:36:37,306 --> 00:36:39,898
Okay, buddy, why don't you
try reversing out?

584
00:36:39,981 --> 00:36:42,940
- Are you giving up?
- This is pointless.

585
00:36:43,023 --> 00:36:45,357
I can't even take driver's ed
until next year.

586
00:36:45,439 --> 00:36:48,103
Vik and I were gonna
start lessons next summer.

587
00:37:08,268 --> 00:37:09,560
Hey, Trev.

588
00:37:11,148 --> 00:37:13,904
Listen, I-I wanted to talk
to you about something.

589
00:37:14,922 --> 00:37:17,560
- Your friend, Brooklyn...
- What about him?

590
00:37:17,857 --> 00:37:19,190
Well, I just wanted you to know

591
00:37:19,273 --> 00:37:22,529
that if there's... if there's
anything you wanted to...

592
00:37:23,456 --> 00:37:25,039
tell me about him or...

593
00:37:25,898 --> 00:37:27,303
Anything at all.

594
00:37:28,351 --> 00:37:31,393
Can we just get Stacey
and go back to Mom's now?

595
00:37:31,538 --> 00:37:33,079
Please.

596
00:37:35,028 --> 00:37:36,070
Of course.

597
00:37:45,606 --> 00:37:48,898
- You better not be heading
for the Switch. - It's my day!

598
00:37:48,981 --> 00:37:50,981
Helen!
What did you do with my razor?

599
00:37:51,065 --> 00:37:52,273
Hey, knock it off.

600
00:37:52,357 --> 00:37:53,648
What?

601
00:37:53,731 --> 00:37:55,965
Razor! It doesn't have a blade.

602
00:37:55,992 --> 00:37:58,778
Well, I threw it away.
It was dull. Oh, hi.

603
00:37:58,805 --> 00:38:01,192
It was only dull because
you shaved your legs with it!

604
00:38:01,219 --> 00:38:04,232
There's more of them
in the top, right-hand drawer.

605
00:38:04,887 --> 00:38:07,056
How was the lesson?

606
00:38:07,083 --> 00:38:09,148
- Can I talk to you?
- Yeah, sure.

607
00:38:09,232 --> 00:38:11,523
You'd lose your mind
if I went into your room!

608
00:38:11,606 --> 00:38:13,107
I didn't go into your room!

609
00:38:13,190 --> 00:38:15,940
I swear to God,
if you guys don't stop...

610
00:38:16,023 --> 00:38:17,232
You and Vik need
to work with me.

611
00:38:17,315 --> 00:38:19,415
- Work with you?
- I am trying

612
00:38:19,442 --> 00:38:20,731
so hard.

613
00:38:20,815 --> 00:38:23,773
I've upended my life to follow
you here for Vik's work,

614
00:38:23,856 --> 00:38:25,497
- to be near my kids.
- Yeah, me too.

615
00:38:25,524 --> 00:38:26,981
And you guys
won't meet me halfway.

616
00:38:27,065 --> 00:38:28,981
I don't... What?

617
00:38:29,065 --> 00:38:30,773
This is supposed to be
a partnership, Helen.

618
00:38:30,856 --> 00:38:33,009
We are co-parenting,
and right now,

619
00:38:33,036 --> 00:38:35,067
I am the only one
extending myself.

620
00:38:35,606 --> 00:38:38,489
You won't encourage
the kids to call back.

621
00:38:38,940 --> 00:38:40,856
You roll over my visitation.

622
00:38:40,940 --> 00:38:43,773
Vik is incredibly competitive
with the kids.

623
00:38:43,856 --> 00:38:46,940
I mean, for fuck's sake,
Helen, they are my children.

624
00:38:47,023 --> 00:38:48,815
Not his.

625
00:38:48,898 --> 00:38:51,530
You just need to tell him
to back the fuck up.

626
00:38:51,557 --> 00:38:52,931
He's dying.

627
00:38:56,606 --> 00:38:58,504
Vik has cancer,

628
00:38:59,357 --> 00:39:02,898
and he's going
to die soon, so...

629
00:39:04,731 --> 00:39:06,148
maybe you'll forgive us

630
00:39:06,232 --> 00:39:08,065
if we aren't
at our best right now.

631
00:39:11,032 --> 00:39:12,616
What kind of cancer?

632
00:39:12,643 --> 00:39:15,101
Does it matter?

633
00:39:16,278 --> 00:39:17,570
The kids know?

634
00:39:21,762 --> 00:39:23,513
Oh, God.

635
00:39:24,972 --> 00:39:26,890
You should have told me.

636
00:39:27,107 --> 00:39:29,023
Why would I have told you?

637
00:39:29,107 --> 00:39:30,611
Because we're friends.

638
00:39:30,638 --> 00:39:32,429
No, we're not.

639
00:39:36,191 --> 00:39:37,982
Jesus, Helen, I...

640
00:39:38,009 --> 00:39:39,385
I'm so sorry.

641
00:39:40,981 --> 00:39:42,315
Look, I-if there's
anything you need,

642
00:39:42,398 --> 00:39:43,523
anything I can do...

643
00:39:43,606 --> 00:39:44,815
I-I can take the kids.

644
00:39:44,898 --> 00:39:46,648
You and Vik can have some time.

645
00:39:47,981 --> 00:39:50,023
Oh, God, Helen, I...

646
00:39:52,935 --> 00:39:55,879
Sorry. I can also... I can
just give you guys some space.

647
00:39:56,095 --> 00:39:57,887
That would be great.

648
00:39:59,460 --> 00:40:00,817
Sure.

649
00:40:02,044 --> 00:40:03,395
Thank you.

650
00:40:23,072 --> 00:40:25,107
- Hey.
- What the fuck?

651
00:40:25,886 --> 00:40:28,094
Sorry. Your-your door was open.

652
00:40:28,121 --> 00:40:29,997
Did I scare you?

653
00:40:32,064 --> 00:40:33,217
No.

654
00:40:34,178 --> 00:40:36,815
It's the hoodie, right? The
hoodie makes me seem threatening.

655
00:40:37,344 --> 00:40:38,344
Better?

656
00:40:38,371 --> 00:40:39,622
That's not funny.

657
00:40:39,776 --> 00:40:41,359
Yeah, it is.

658
00:40:49,362 --> 00:40:52,218
Well, now that you've
made yourself at home...

659
00:40:52,555 --> 00:40:54,513
want to tell me why you're here?

660
00:40:55,107 --> 00:40:56,981
How do you even
know where I live?

661
00:40:57,065 --> 00:40:59,398
Read through my mom's
personnel files.

662
00:40:59,723 --> 00:41:01,307
I've seen all your pay stubs.

663
00:41:03,357 --> 00:41:06,023
Well, then you should have known
not to eat all my prosciutto.

664
00:41:06,732 --> 00:41:09,314
I'm playing.
I-I White-Paged you, actually.

665
00:41:09,882 --> 00:41:11,070
It's that easy, huh?

666
00:41:11,168 --> 00:41:12,502
That's disturbing.

667
00:41:12,529 --> 00:41:14,612
Yeah, I think you
can get it blocked.

668
00:41:18,713 --> 00:41:20,713
I need your thoughts.

669
00:41:22,140 --> 00:41:23,926
Okay. What about?

670
00:41:23,953 --> 00:41:25,851
On whether or not
I should join the Marines.

671
00:41:25,953 --> 00:41:27,439
What?

672
00:41:27,523 --> 00:41:29,148
What about college?

673
00:41:29,232 --> 00:41:31,232
I need to be my own man,
Mr. Solloway.

674
00:41:31,315 --> 00:41:34,315
I-I can't keep letting my parents
push me around like this.

675
00:41:34,398 --> 00:41:36,273
It's not right.

676
00:41:36,755 --> 00:41:40,330
Look, I know you and my mom have
something going on right now.

677
00:41:42,190 --> 00:41:43,481
She can be a real bully.

678
00:41:44,103 --> 00:41:47,646
- You should know that.
- Yeah, I do know that, Anton.

679
00:41:49,148 --> 00:41:52,190
I also know that she loves you
like a crazy person,

680
00:41:52,273 --> 00:41:54,523
and right now she's having
a hard time letting you go.

681
00:41:54,606 --> 00:41:56,148
And that's normal.
That's not her.

682
00:41:56,232 --> 00:42:00,357
That's just what happens when the
time comes for kids to flee the nest.

683
00:42:00,439 --> 00:42:02,981
You'd really rather go to war
than go to college?

684
00:42:03,065 --> 00:42:05,773
Well, they said the chances
of me seeing combat are slim.

685
00:42:05,856 --> 00:42:07,352
Yeah, they're lying.

686
00:42:07,379 --> 00:42:11,648
This country is pretty much
at war somewhere all the time.

687
00:42:11,731 --> 00:42:14,769
Well, any way I go,

688
00:42:15,002 --> 00:42:17,503
one of them is going
to be disappointed.

689
00:42:20,114 --> 00:42:22,573
Look, you came here.
You want my advice, right?

690
00:42:25,564 --> 00:42:27,481
I really think
you need to see Princeton.

691
00:42:27,564 --> 00:42:29,148
Just see it. Just...

692
00:42:29,232 --> 00:42:31,107
spend some time there.

693
00:42:31,190 --> 00:42:33,481
You have this idea in your head
that it's a terrible place.

694
00:42:33,564 --> 00:42:35,523
Maybe it is,
but maybe you'd like it.

695
00:42:35,606 --> 00:42:37,107
Well, how am I supposed
to pull that off?

696
00:42:37,190 --> 00:42:38,564
It's all the way
across the country.

697
00:42:38,648 --> 00:42:39,815
Your mom will take you there.

698
00:42:39,898 --> 00:42:41,065
No, she won't.

699
00:42:41,148 --> 00:42:43,176
- How do you know?
- I just do.

700
00:42:43,203 --> 00:42:44,543
Have you asked her?

701
00:42:48,107 --> 00:42:49,940
How did you get here? You drive?

702
00:42:50,023 --> 00:42:51,688
No, I Ubered.
I never get to drive.

703
00:42:51,715 --> 00:42:53,107
I don't have a fucking car.

704
00:42:53,375 --> 00:42:55,125
Okay. Let's go.

705
00:42:55,152 --> 00:42:57,190
- Where are we going?
- To talk to your mom.

706
00:42:57,273 --> 00:42:59,730
No. I just got here.
She'll kill me if she finds out

707
00:42:59,757 --> 00:43:01,439
- I came to you.
- Come on.

708
00:43:01,523 --> 00:43:02,898
I'll let you drive.

709
00:43:03,223 --> 00:43:04,730
Down the PCH.

710
00:43:20,232 --> 00:43:23,974
Why can't you rebel
like a normal kid?

711
00:43:24,523 --> 00:43:27,400
Go to Europe for a year.
Date a white girl.

712
00:43:27,427 --> 00:43:29,341
You really want to fuck
with me and your dad?

713
00:43:29,368 --> 00:43:32,135
Do the Peace Corps in some
awful third-world place.

714
00:43:32,162 --> 00:43:34,065
Don't join the fucking Army.

715
00:43:34,204 --> 00:43:36,794
- Marines.
- Boy, I will kill you.

716
00:43:36,821 --> 00:43:38,856
Look, if I go to the Marines,
I won't be a victim.

717
00:43:38,940 --> 00:43:40,190
What are you talking about?

718
00:43:40,273 --> 00:43:42,471
How is shooting
other brown people

719
00:43:42,498 --> 00:43:44,606
gonna give you agency?
Hear yourself.

720
00:43:44,689 --> 00:43:46,065
No, hear yourself.

721
00:43:46,148 --> 00:43:48,709
It is always about race
and agency with you.

722
00:43:48,912 --> 00:43:50,013
What nine-year-old has

723
00:43:50,040 --> 00:43:51,955
a Black Revolutionary-themed
birthday party?

724
00:43:51,982 --> 00:43:53,648
Fucking Marcus Garvey
on the chocolate cake?

725
00:43:53,731 --> 00:43:55,065
Malcolm X napkins?

726
00:43:55,148 --> 00:43:57,107
- Like, who does that?
- They make those?

727
00:43:57,160 --> 00:43:59,302
Yes. This is what I've had
to deal with my whole life.

728
00:43:59,329 --> 00:44:01,068
- To protect you.
- Look, if I have a target

729
00:44:01,095 --> 00:44:03,232
on my back,
why shouldn't I sign up?

730
00:44:03,581 --> 00:44:05,451
At least then I'll have a gun.

731
00:44:06,998 --> 00:44:09,190
- What are you doing here?
- Your mother called.

732
00:44:09,273 --> 00:44:11,606
She didn't know where you went.

733
00:44:11,689 --> 00:44:13,736
You can't disappear without
telling her where you're going.

734
00:44:13,763 --> 00:44:15,400
You know that. She worries.

735
00:44:15,427 --> 00:44:17,294
Why? I'm 19 years old.

736
00:44:17,373 --> 00:44:18,511
Tell him.

737
00:44:18,998 --> 00:44:21,022
Go on.
You're such an adult. Tell him.

738
00:44:21,049 --> 00:44:22,382
Tell him what you did.

739
00:44:23,815 --> 00:44:25,648
I talked to a recruiter
about joining the Marines.

740
00:44:25,731 --> 00:44:26,898
You did what?

741
00:44:28,818 --> 00:44:29,689
Hi.

742
00:44:29,773 --> 00:44:31,815
Does this motherfucker
live here now?

743
00:44:31,898 --> 00:44:33,773
Look, I-I know
it's not my place...

744
00:44:33,856 --> 00:44:35,398
Oh, you're damn right.

745
00:44:35,481 --> 00:44:38,689
But your kid came to my house
looking for help, so...

746
00:44:39,207 --> 00:44:41,249
I thought maybe we could all
just talk about it.

747
00:44:41,276 --> 00:44:42,689
Who the fuck does
your boyfriend think he is?

748
00:44:42,773 --> 00:44:44,148
He's not my boyfriend.

749
00:44:44,232 --> 00:44:47,140
Reason he wants to join
the Marines is because

750
00:44:47,167 --> 00:44:49,523
he can't make a decision
about this Princeton thing

751
00:44:49,606 --> 00:44:52,898
because he is terrified
of hurting one of you.

752
00:44:52,981 --> 00:44:55,148
So, what I suggested was that

753
00:44:55,232 --> 00:44:57,315
somebody should just
take him there.

754
00:44:57,398 --> 00:44:59,273
Let him see the school,
see if he likes it,

755
00:44:59,357 --> 00:45:00,523
make his own decision.

756
00:45:00,606 --> 00:45:01,856
Sounds reasonable to me.

757
00:45:01,940 --> 00:45:04,831
- If I go, it'd have to be
this week. - Why?

758
00:45:04,950 --> 00:45:07,367
Because I scheduled
to take the GED next Monday.

759
00:45:08,558 --> 00:45:11,069
Anton... in order
to take the GED,

760
00:45:11,096 --> 00:45:12,776
you have to drop out
of high school.

761
00:45:12,909 --> 00:45:15,065
I can't join the Marines
without it.

762
00:45:15,148 --> 00:45:16,856
- Oh, no.
- You have school this week.

763
00:45:16,940 --> 00:45:19,065
Hell no. You're not joining
the fucking military.

764
00:45:19,148 --> 00:45:20,564
Look, I can miss
a couple classes.

765
00:45:20,648 --> 00:45:22,273
I already took these
fucking classes anyway.

766
00:45:22,398 --> 00:45:23,940
Boy, don't talk like that
to your mother.

767
00:45:24,023 --> 00:45:26,481
Why is it, whenever you're mad at me,
you act like you're still her man?

768
00:45:26,564 --> 00:45:28,132
- You want to live?
- Oh, Jesus.

769
00:45:28,159 --> 00:45:29,773
Not another word.

770
00:45:29,856 --> 00:45:31,663
Look, Carl, my friend...

771
00:45:31,690 --> 00:45:33,445
Man, why are you
all up in my family?

772
00:45:33,472 --> 00:45:34,606
You don't have your own?

773
00:45:35,572 --> 00:45:36,734
Yeah, I do.

774
00:45:36,778 --> 00:45:38,417
Then what the fuck
you doing here?

775
00:45:39,672 --> 00:45:41,526
Anton, go to your room.

776
00:45:41,648 --> 00:45:43,107
Carl, go home.

777
00:45:43,190 --> 00:45:45,745
Let's... let's just
sleep on this, okay?

778
00:45:45,784 --> 00:45:47,107
We don't have to make
any decisions tonight.

779
00:45:47,190 --> 00:45:48,523
We don't have to do anything.

780
00:45:48,606 --> 00:45:51,026
- It's my decision.
- Okay.

781
00:45:51,112 --> 00:45:53,273
If you want to go to the school,

782
00:45:53,300 --> 00:45:55,107
I'll take you
this week. I promise.

783
00:45:55,190 --> 00:45:57,689
- Janelle, what about the board meeting?
- This is more important.

784
00:45:57,773 --> 00:45:58,898
Janelle, hold up.

785
00:45:58,981 --> 00:46:00,315
We talked about sending him

786
00:46:00,398 --> 00:46:03,148
to a state school...
public education.

787
00:46:03,175 --> 00:46:05,136
We agreed on that
when he was a baby.

788
00:46:05,163 --> 00:46:07,829
- Things have changed, Carl.
- No, you've changed.

789
00:46:07,856 --> 00:46:09,773
- Dad, what if I want to go?
- Anton, just be quiet.

790
00:46:09,856 --> 00:46:11,148
Just because you
couldn't make it there

791
00:46:11,232 --> 00:46:12,232
doesn't mean I can't.

792
00:46:12,315 --> 00:46:13,232
Carl!

793
00:46:13,510 --> 00:46:14,759
Hey.

794
00:46:16,564 --> 00:46:18,097
You gonna hit me?

795
00:46:18,731 --> 00:46:20,018
Hit me.

796
00:46:20,963 --> 00:46:22,589
Go ahead.

797
00:46:24,273 --> 00:46:25,398
Carl.

798
00:46:31,817 --> 00:46:34,443
So you a man now.

799
00:46:35,706 --> 00:46:37,581
Okay, be a man.

800
00:46:40,697 --> 00:46:42,783
Go see what it's like.

801
00:47:07,940 --> 00:47:09,815
Hi. It's Whitney.
Leave a message.

802
00:47:10,616 --> 00:47:12,362
Hey, Whit, it's Dad.

803
00:47:12,534 --> 00:47:15,565
It's super late where you are. You're
probably asleep, but I just, uh...

804
00:47:15,713 --> 00:47:17,190
I was just calling to say hi.

805
00:47:17,273 --> 00:47:20,481
Mom keeps me informed
about most things, but, um...

806
00:47:20,564 --> 00:47:22,815
good to hear from you
once in a while.

807
00:47:22,898 --> 00:47:24,940
It's been a while.

808
00:47:25,023 --> 00:47:26,606
Okay. Love you.

809
00:47:26,689 --> 00:47:28,190
Call me if you can.

810
00:47:28,273 --> 00:47:30,659
If you feel like it. Bye.

811
00:47:57,958 --> 00:48:00,625
- Hey.
- Hey.

812
00:48:02,854 --> 00:48:04,188
Can I come in?

813
00:48:04,215 --> 00:48:05,840
Of course.

814
00:48:10,398 --> 00:48:11,523
It's nice.

815
00:48:11,606 --> 00:48:13,107
Thanks.

816
00:48:13,629 --> 00:48:15,045
You renting?

817
00:48:15,072 --> 00:48:16,065
Yeah.

818
00:48:16,148 --> 00:48:17,273
Thank God.

819
00:48:17,357 --> 00:48:19,357
How did you find me?

820
00:48:19,439 --> 00:48:22,928
Um, I made Anton
tell me where you live.

821
00:48:22,955 --> 00:48:25,572
What, and you drove all the way up
here in the middle of the night?

822
00:48:25,599 --> 00:48:27,970
You didn't call or text or...?

823
00:48:29,119 --> 00:48:31,689
- Should I go?
- No, no, please, no.

824
00:48:32,001 --> 00:48:33,564
Sit down.

825
00:48:34,064 --> 00:48:36,533
Can I get you anything?
I... I've got whiskey.

826
00:48:36,560 --> 00:48:39,830
You can, but let me just
say something first.

827
00:48:41,501 --> 00:48:44,023
Thank you for what you did.

828
00:48:44,962 --> 00:48:47,315
- I didn't do anything.
- No, you did.

829
00:48:47,648 --> 00:48:49,273
You stood up for my son.

830
00:48:49,775 --> 00:48:51,533
That was crazy earlier.

831
00:48:51,560 --> 00:48:53,934
Well, we've all been there.

832
00:48:56,398 --> 00:48:58,357
We've been, uh...

833
00:48:58,639 --> 00:49:00,889
divorced for so long,

834
00:49:00,916 --> 00:49:03,315
you'd think we'd be
over it by now,

835
00:49:03,398 --> 00:49:05,773
figured out a way
to forgive each other,

836
00:49:06,381 --> 00:49:08,381
find some peace.

837
00:49:08,557 --> 00:49:10,682
But somehow...

838
00:49:11,815 --> 00:49:14,069
They say time heals all wounds,

839
00:49:14,096 --> 00:49:15,263
but sometimes it doesn't.

840
00:49:17,074 --> 00:49:18,190
No, it doesn't.

841
00:49:18,273 --> 00:49:20,232
It just makes things worse.

842
00:49:21,981 --> 00:49:23,856
Anyway, I just...

843
00:49:26,315 --> 00:49:28,773
Of course he should have
seen the damn school.

844
00:49:28,856 --> 00:49:30,564
I should have taken him.

845
00:49:32,773 --> 00:49:34,523
I'm gonna take him this week.

846
00:49:36,249 --> 00:49:39,148
- What about the board meeting?
- What about it?

847
00:49:39,466 --> 00:49:41,632
If they fire me, they fire me.

848
00:49:44,023 --> 00:49:45,940
Look, what if I take him?

849
00:49:48,077 --> 00:49:49,410
You?

850
00:49:49,437 --> 00:49:50,773
I'm the neutral party.

851
00:49:50,856 --> 00:49:53,077
I can take him there,
introduce him to my friend.

852
00:49:53,104 --> 00:49:54,856
He can observe a class.

853
00:49:55,182 --> 00:49:57,474
Then we come back,
and he can make his decision.

854
00:49:58,101 --> 00:49:59,439
You'd do that?

855
00:49:59,847 --> 00:50:01,472
I'd be happy to do it.

856
00:50:01,499 --> 00:50:02,856
If it's okay with you.

857
00:50:02,940 --> 00:50:05,065
And Carl, of course.

858
00:50:05,148 --> 00:50:06,648
If it's a choice between this

859
00:50:06,731 --> 00:50:08,523
and the goddamn Marines,
who knows?

860
00:50:08,606 --> 00:50:10,564
Maybe he would.

861
00:50:10,859 --> 00:50:12,318
He should go.

862
00:50:19,979 --> 00:50:21,846
Why are you doing this, Noah?

863
00:50:23,326 --> 00:50:25,867
You really think my son
is that brilliant?

864
00:50:28,065 --> 00:50:29,546
Yeah, I do.

865
00:50:30,834 --> 00:50:32,958
But I'm not doing it for him.

866
00:51:16,689 --> 00:51:19,856
- Does it turn you on
that I'm your boss? - Oh, Jesus.

867
00:51:19,940 --> 00:51:21,689
Janelle, shut the fuck up.

868
00:51:38,398 --> 00:51:40,898
Oh, my. Oh, my.

869
00:51:40,981 --> 00:51:43,148
Oh, my God.

870
00:51:45,096 --> 00:51:46,554
Oh, my.

871
00:51:56,553 --> 00:51:58,386
Oh, fuck.

872
00:52:08,856 --> 00:52:10,398
Excuse me. Can you tell me

873
00:52:10,481 --> 00:52:12,357
what the connecting gate
to New York is?

874
00:52:12,439 --> 00:52:13,689
We don't have that information.

875
00:52:13,773 --> 00:52:15,439
You'll have to check in
on the ground.

876
00:52:15,664 --> 00:52:17,206
Okay, thanks.

877
00:52:18,232 --> 00:52:19,689
Hey.

878
00:52:19,773 --> 00:52:21,564
Because we were
delayed taking off,

879
00:52:21,648 --> 00:52:23,564
we're gonna have to book it
when we hit the ground

880
00:52:23,648 --> 00:52:24,731
to make our connection, okay?

881
00:52:24,955 --> 00:52:26,533
Should've got a direct flight.

882
00:52:27,648 --> 00:52:28,981
Yeah, well, your mother
booked this yesterday.

883
00:52:29,065 --> 00:52:31,023
We were lucky to get
any flight at all.

884
00:52:32,648 --> 00:52:34,148
Did you talk to your dad?

885
00:52:35,013 --> 00:52:36,679
He won't call me back.

886
00:52:42,190 --> 00:52:43,898
You're listening to my book?

887
00:52:43,981 --> 00:52:45,107
Yeah.

888
00:52:45,510 --> 00:52:47,148
It's pretty good, actually.

889
00:52:48,112 --> 00:52:49,151
Thanks.

890
00:52:54,134 --> 00:52:55,267
What?

891
00:52:55,411 --> 00:52:57,191
- _
- That's weird.

892
00:52:59,607 --> 00:53:00,814
Yo.

893
00:53:05,387 --> 00:53:06,815
Hi.

894
00:53:06,898 --> 00:53:09,731
Uh, we missed our connecting
flight to New York, so...

895
00:53:09,815 --> 00:53:10,981
Uh, no.

896
00:53:12,278 --> 00:53:13,065
"No"?

897
00:53:13,148 --> 00:53:16,020
No, we have no more flights
to New York today.

898
00:53:16,543 --> 00:53:19,970
- What about the shuttle?
- They're all booked.

899
00:53:19,997 --> 00:53:22,148
We've had delays all day
because of the wind.

900
00:53:22,232 --> 00:53:23,190
What about standby?

901
00:53:23,273 --> 00:53:25,107
Good luck with standby.

902
00:53:25,747 --> 00:53:27,190
Come on, is there anything
you can do to help?

903
00:53:27,273 --> 00:53:30,981
Well, let me see
if I can switch you to...

904
00:53:32,590 --> 00:53:34,439
Tomorrow night, 8:23.

905
00:53:34,523 --> 00:53:36,107
No, we have to get
to New York tonight.

906
00:53:36,190 --> 00:53:37,815
Then rent a car.

907
00:53:45,789 --> 00:53:47,664
They're gonna run out of cars.

908
00:53:53,374 --> 00:53:55,040
Cole?

909
00:53:58,377 --> 00:53:59,729
Wait.

910
00:54:01,273 --> 00:54:02,564
Wait. Cole, slow down.

911
00:54:02,648 --> 00:54:04,109
What do you mean?

912
00:54:04,689 --> 00:54:07,105
- _
- So, who's coming to get us?

913
00:54:07,132 --> 00:54:08,638
- _
- An old friend.

914
00:54:21,232 --> 00:54:24,023
Welcome to
O'Hare International Airport.

915
00:54:24,107 --> 00:54:25,731
Loading zones
for rideshare services

916
00:54:25,815 --> 00:54:27,523
are located on the upper level

917
00:54:27,606 --> 00:54:29,898
of terminals one,
three and four.

918
00:54:44,207 --> 00:54:45,720
I'm sure she's fine.

919
00:54:46,867 --> 00:54:49,159
That makes one of us.

920
00:54:56,227 --> 00:55:01,164
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