1 00:00:07,114 --> 00:00:11,929 CREDITS 2 00:00:13,347 --> 00:00:14,746 Okay, mark. 3 00:00:31,898 --> 00:00:33,231 My name is Trent Richards. 4 00:00:33,233 --> 00:00:36,701 Join me as I explore Caleb Faustini's meteoric rise 5 00:00:36,703 --> 00:00:38,703 to super stardom, 6 00:00:38,705 --> 00:00:43,508 and his unexplainable fall from grace. 7 00:00:43,510 --> 00:00:44,442 How was that? 8 00:00:44,444 --> 00:00:45,177 Crushed it, Trent. 9 00:00:45,179 --> 00:00:46,511 It's what I do, bro. 10 00:00:47,848 --> 00:00:50,983 Give it up, give it up for Caleb! 11 00:00:50,985 --> 00:00:52,985 ? Girl, I have been lovin' you ? 12 00:00:52,987 --> 00:00:56,054 ? Longer than there have been mountains ? 13 00:00:56,056 --> 00:01:00,525 ? As loves go, this is like the top of Everest ? 14 00:01:00,527 --> 00:01:02,795 ? And so, I got to gear up ? 15 00:01:02,797 --> 00:01:07,265 ? 'Cause I'll be climbing clear up to the crest ? 16 00:01:07,267 --> 00:01:10,134 ? Of the mountain ? 17 00:01:10,136 --> 00:01:12,204 ? I dress just like them ? 18 00:01:12,206 --> 00:01:13,672 ? My love is solid ? 19 00:01:13,674 --> 00:01:15,474 ? It's not hollow ? 20 00:01:15,476 --> 00:01:17,342 ? So, get off your molehill ? 21 00:01:17,344 --> 00:01:20,144 ? And get onto my Kilimanjaro ? 22 00:01:20,146 --> 00:01:22,947 I don't make music. I make moments. 23 00:01:22,949 --> 00:01:26,819 So, it's, like, everything, right... it's music. 24 00:01:26,821 --> 00:01:30,155 It's, like, the visual. It's, like, the fashion. 25 00:01:30,157 --> 00:01:32,825 It's, like, the whole personality. 26 00:01:32,827 --> 00:01:35,227 Memes. 27 00:01:35,229 --> 00:01:37,295 It's all me. 28 00:01:37,297 --> 00:01:39,031 ? Your summit is so hot ? 29 00:01:39,033 --> 00:01:42,034 ? Let's put the Mount in Rushmore ? 30 00:01:42,036 --> 00:01:43,968 ? Just got to remove your top ? 31 00:01:43,970 --> 00:01:47,372 ? So I can mine for precious ore ? 32 00:01:47,374 --> 00:01:49,441 ? Yeah, yeah, yeah ? 33 00:01:49,443 --> 00:01:52,044 ? Yeah, yeah, yeah ? 34 00:01:52,046 --> 00:01:56,048 Yo, to the fans who've been with me since day one, 35 00:01:56,050 --> 00:01:57,582 I owe everything to you. 36 00:01:57,584 --> 00:01:59,317 I love you from the bottom of my heart. 37 00:01:59,319 --> 00:02:02,054 Mwah! This is for all the haters. 38 00:02:02,056 --> 00:02:02,987 I love you! 39 00:02:02,989 --> 00:02:05,457 I love you, too. Shut up, though. 40 00:02:05,459 --> 00:02:07,125 ? Mountain ? ? I got to scale it ? 41 00:02:07,127 --> 00:02:10,195 ? Mountain ? ? Got a shot to impale it ? 42 00:02:10,197 --> 00:02:12,997 ? You're a mountain I'm gonna be mountin' ? 43 00:02:14,735 --> 00:02:17,870 Yo, don't listen to the haters. 44 00:02:17,872 --> 00:02:20,205 You could be anything you want, 45 00:02:20,207 --> 00:02:23,542 as long as you dream big and believe in yourself. 46 00:02:23,544 --> 00:02:27,812 I love you all. But, yo, praise God. 47 00:02:34,889 --> 00:02:38,490 - Caleb Faustini... - In custody... 48 00:02:38,492 --> 00:02:41,293 - Tweens inconsolable. - Where is Caleb? 49 00:02:41,295 --> 00:02:43,228 Alice Faustini? Yes. 50 00:02:43,230 --> 00:02:45,230 Hi. Can I just ask you a few questions about Caleb? 51 00:02:45,232 --> 00:02:47,566 No, no, no. I'm sorry. You have to go. 52 00:02:47,568 --> 00:02:49,634 It would only take five minutes. Those are beautiful. 53 00:02:49,636 --> 00:02:51,369 No. No. No, they're not, 54 00:02:51,371 --> 00:02:53,505 and, no, you may not ask me any questions about my son. 55 00:02:53,507 --> 00:02:54,439 You need to get off my lawn now, okay? 56 00:02:54,441 --> 00:02:55,708 We're doing a documentary, 57 00:02:55,710 --> 00:02:57,376 and I think there's a responsibility that he has... 58 00:02:57,378 --> 00:02:58,577 I don't care. I don't care. I don't care. 59 00:02:58,579 --> 00:02:59,912 You need to get off my lawn, okay? 60 00:02:59,914 --> 00:03:01,313 ...to his fans, and I think... Okay, you know what? 61 00:03:01,315 --> 00:03:03,248 I'm telling you to leave, and you're not leaving. 62 00:03:03,250 --> 00:03:04,849 Alice, literally three minutes? 63 00:03:04,851 --> 00:03:07,051 I don't feel like you're hearing me right now. 64 00:03:07,053 --> 00:03:08,587 Okay? Two minutes. 65 00:03:08,589 --> 00:03:11,123 Not the camera, Alice! No! No! No! 66 00:03:11,125 --> 00:03:13,525 Alice, no, no! Get off my lawn! 67 00:03:13,527 --> 00:03:16,728 I just want to say I'm a big fan. 68 00:03:16,730 --> 00:03:19,732 First of all, you should be, and you're welcome. 69 00:03:19,734 --> 00:03:22,401 What's your relationship to Caleb Faustini? 70 00:03:24,805 --> 00:03:26,204 I don't have no relationship with Caleb. 71 00:03:26,206 --> 00:03:28,006 You produced all of his hit records, Treece, 72 00:03:28,008 --> 00:03:30,342 and you're telling me that you're not friends... 73 00:03:30,344 --> 00:03:34,279 You have no relationship at all to Caleb Faustini? 74 00:03:34,281 --> 00:03:35,413 That's what I said, isn't it? 75 00:03:35,415 --> 00:03:37,950 Was there a falling-out? 76 00:03:37,952 --> 00:03:40,084 Man, you told me, if I did this interview, 77 00:03:40,086 --> 00:03:42,354 we could talk about my waffle iron, 78 00:03:42,356 --> 00:03:45,090 Treece's Magic Waffle Genie, okay? 79 00:03:45,092 --> 00:03:46,425 We ain't talk about that yet. 80 00:03:46,427 --> 00:03:48,092 You act like you're not impressed. 81 00:03:48,094 --> 00:03:49,294 You act like you're not walking around here, 82 00:03:49,296 --> 00:03:50,429 eating 7-minute waffles. 83 00:03:50,431 --> 00:03:51,896 I'm in the future. Where is he, Treece? 84 00:03:51,898 --> 00:03:53,298 If you'd let me talk about it... Caleb Faustini. 85 00:03:53,300 --> 00:03:55,099 Well, these are available in stores everywhere 86 00:03:55,101 --> 00:03:56,835 is where these are. I'm concerned. 87 00:03:56,837 --> 00:03:58,837 About what? About your safety? You should be right now. 88 00:03:58,839 --> 00:04:00,639 I'm about to hit you in the head with this Waffle Genie. 89 00:04:00,641 --> 00:04:03,175 That would not behoove you. Behoove me? He said "behoove." 90 00:04:03,177 --> 00:04:04,777 Well, you're about to get behooved upside your head. 91 00:04:04,779 --> 00:04:06,111 I want to know where Caleb is. 92 00:04:06,113 --> 00:04:07,379 Is he raising his... Hey, man. 93 00:04:07,381 --> 00:04:08,781 I don't like your tone right now, man. 94 00:04:08,783 --> 00:04:10,783 You're in my house. It's just my inside tone, Treece. 95 00:04:10,785 --> 00:04:12,717 Listen, man, lock the doors. 96 00:04:12,719 --> 00:04:13,852 Don't do that. Oh, too late. 97 00:04:13,854 --> 00:04:15,120 Oh, it's too... Ooh-ooh! 98 00:04:15,122 --> 00:04:17,121 I'm feeling a little threatened. You should. 99 00:04:17,123 --> 00:04:18,991 That is what I'm doing... I'm threatening you right now. 100 00:04:18,993 --> 00:04:21,259 I'm out. Leave. 101 00:04:21,261 --> 00:04:23,796 I feel like none of that's usable, you know? 102 00:04:23,798 --> 00:04:26,865 I feel like I look like a dick. Did I look like a dick? 103 00:04:26,867 --> 00:04:28,801 Hey, excuse me. White boy. 104 00:04:28,803 --> 00:04:31,804 Hey, man, you came a long way, brah. I got something for you. 105 00:04:31,806 --> 00:04:33,806 Here's some of the information right here. 106 00:04:33,808 --> 00:04:36,208 He knows exactly what happened to Caleb. 107 00:04:42,616 --> 00:04:44,549 Thank you for taking the time to meet with us today, Satan. 108 00:04:44,551 --> 00:04:47,019 Oh, yeah, no. This is fun. This is fun. 109 00:04:47,021 --> 00:04:50,155 I never knew how they... How they make these things. 110 00:04:50,157 --> 00:04:52,491 Is that what you prefer we call you? Satan? 111 00:04:52,493 --> 00:04:55,694 Uh, Satan, yeah. Yeah. Well, that's my name. 112 00:04:55,696 --> 00:04:57,216 You really believe you're the devil. 113 00:04:58,765 --> 00:05:00,432 Oh, no, no. I am... I am the devil. 114 00:05:00,434 --> 00:05:02,901 Yeah. I'm the devil. 115 00:05:02,903 --> 00:05:03,968 Here, I'll show you. 116 00:05:06,973 --> 00:05:08,573 I keep everything in here. 117 00:05:08,575 --> 00:05:10,909 That's not it. That's not it. 118 00:05:10,911 --> 00:05:12,310 Give me a second. Ah! Found... 119 00:05:12,312 --> 00:05:16,114 Oh, no. That's my froYo card. I will find it, if it kills me. 120 00:05:16,116 --> 00:05:17,249 Or you. 121 00:05:17,251 --> 00:05:18,783 Ah! Here it is. 122 00:05:26,126 --> 00:05:27,593 Satan. 123 00:05:29,396 --> 00:05:31,463 Yeah, it's fun. 124 00:05:31,465 --> 00:05:34,399 No, you still don't believe me, huh? 125 00:05:43,410 --> 00:05:45,744 Aah! I'm sorry. I'm sorry. 126 00:05:45,746 --> 00:05:48,213 I get into one of my moods and... I'm sorry. 127 00:05:48,215 --> 00:05:49,614 You want some water? 128 00:05:49,616 --> 00:05:51,616 Hey, Karen? 129 00:05:51,618 --> 00:05:53,552 Karen, can we get some water in here? 130 00:05:53,554 --> 00:05:54,953 Ice? No ice? No ice. 131 00:05:54,955 --> 00:05:57,089 No ice this time, Karen! 132 00:06:01,262 --> 00:06:02,327 - Hey. - Hi. 133 00:06:02,329 --> 00:06:03,795 - May I help you? - Yes. 134 00:06:10,003 --> 00:06:12,071 I'm actually looking for an individual 135 00:06:12,073 --> 00:06:14,339 I believe that might work here. Oh, hey. What's up, girl? 136 00:06:14,341 --> 00:06:15,474 Steve. You already know what time it is. 137 00:06:15,476 --> 00:06:16,808 I'm here to get that junk. Caleb. 138 00:06:16,810 --> 00:06:17,743 Yeah. Caleb Faustini. 139 00:06:17,745 --> 00:06:19,344 No, no, no, no, dude. 140 00:06:19,346 --> 00:06:21,212 Caleb, I just need five minutes of your time. 141 00:06:21,214 --> 00:06:23,014 Nah, dude, you got it twisted, man. 142 00:06:23,016 --> 00:06:25,350 I'm Steve, all right? 143 00:06:25,352 --> 00:06:26,818 Caleb... 144 00:06:26,820 --> 00:06:29,888 there is no denying that this is you. 145 00:06:29,890 --> 00:06:32,223 Yo, that don't even look like me. 146 00:06:32,225 --> 00:06:34,893 Oh, my God! Check it out! This dude is Caleb Faustini! 147 00:06:34,895 --> 00:06:36,095 Yeah. 148 00:06:36,097 --> 00:06:38,097 ? Girl, I just been lovin' you ? 149 00:06:38,099 --> 00:06:40,031 ? Longer than there have been mountains ? 150 00:06:40,033 --> 00:06:41,366 Yeah, that ain't even the words, though. 151 00:06:41,368 --> 00:06:42,834 ? You're the mountain I'ma be mountin' ? 152 00:06:42,836 --> 00:06:45,370 ? Girl, I have been loving you longer than the... ? 153 00:06:45,372 --> 00:06:46,237 ? On the top of mountains ? 154 00:06:46,239 --> 00:06:47,238 What is going on here? 155 00:06:47,240 --> 00:06:48,373 ? Ooh, baby ? 156 00:06:48,375 --> 00:06:50,535 You got deliveries to make? Go do your job. 157 00:06:52,313 --> 00:06:54,179 Yeah, I'm gonna have to ask you to leave. And we can address that in the interview. 158 00:06:54,181 --> 00:06:56,648 Who is that, even? That's what I'd love to know. I would love to talk to you. 159 00:06:56,650 --> 00:06:58,317 I'm Steve! You know who that is, right? 160 00:06:58,319 --> 00:07:00,719 Yeah, he's the best janitor I've ever had. 161 00:07:00,721 --> 00:07:02,921 What? 162 00:07:11,064 --> 00:07:13,332 I know you're all feeling a lot of hostility. 163 00:07:13,334 --> 00:07:16,335 I'm so glad you all agreed to be here and do this. 164 00:07:16,337 --> 00:07:17,736 This is Carol. 165 00:07:17,738 --> 00:07:21,606 He's a professional family mediator and counselor. 166 00:07:21,608 --> 00:07:23,742 He is gonna work us through this. 167 00:07:23,744 --> 00:07:28,347 Okay, um, who would like to begin? 168 00:07:38,892 --> 00:07:42,494 Caleb. Okay! God! 169 00:07:42,496 --> 00:07:45,964 I just feel like Satan let me down. 170 00:07:45,966 --> 00:07:47,499 Oh, I let you down? Yeah, dude. 171 00:07:47,501 --> 00:07:48,500 Okay, well... 172 00:07:48,502 --> 00:07:49,968 You're a sheisty-ass back-stabber. 173 00:07:49,970 --> 00:07:52,037 That's a great start, but let's, uh, 174 00:07:52,039 --> 00:07:53,505 let's slow it down here for a second. 175 00:07:53,507 --> 00:07:55,707 Let us try this... Not calling names, 176 00:07:55,709 --> 00:07:58,510 but rather frame our feelings in statements. 177 00:07:58,512 --> 00:08:02,113 For example, when Satan does blank, 178 00:08:02,115 --> 00:08:04,750 it makes me feel blank. 179 00:08:07,188 --> 00:08:12,291 When Satan does blank, it makes me feel blank. 180 00:08:14,127 --> 00:08:17,062 - Are you [bleep] kidding me? - What? 181 00:08:17,064 --> 00:08:19,531 What? No. I said exactly what you said. 182 00:08:21,001 --> 00:08:24,403 How did you meet Satan? I can field the question. 183 00:08:24,405 --> 00:08:26,872 Field or feel? It sounded like he said field. 184 00:08:26,874 --> 00:08:29,274 - Field. - Has he always... 185 00:08:29,276 --> 00:08:33,278 What was Caleb like as a child? 186 00:08:33,280 --> 00:08:35,480 He was selfish, arrogant, lazy... 187 00:08:35,482 --> 00:08:37,015 Oh, here we go... an ingrate, illiterate. 188 00:08:37,017 --> 00:08:38,617 Do you want me to go on? Yeah, I do, actually. 189 00:08:38,619 --> 00:08:40,219 'Cause I could do this all day. Don't listen to Mamadukes. Okay? 190 00:08:40,221 --> 00:08:42,221 Mamadukes has what we call a hormonal imbalance. 191 00:08:42,223 --> 00:08:43,822 I do not. She's cray-cray. 192 00:08:43,824 --> 00:08:46,357 Oh, okay. Well, "cray-cray" isn't a word. 193 00:08:46,359 --> 00:08:49,094 Okay, you know what? I'm not cray-cray. 194 00:08:49,096 --> 00:08:51,296 I hate that word. I don't li... It's not even a word. 195 00:08:51,298 --> 00:08:52,764 Lots of people make up words on the street. 196 00:08:52,766 --> 00:08:54,032 It's called a poor-man-do. 197 00:08:54,034 --> 00:08:57,036 Your problem is, he's always wanted to be famous. 198 00:08:57,038 --> 00:08:59,104 And, also, you're mean. 199 00:08:59,106 --> 00:09:01,506 Yeah, man. I got to be hard. 200 00:09:01,508 --> 00:09:02,908 I came up in these streets, son! 201 00:09:02,910 --> 00:09:04,509 You did not. We're from Vermont. 202 00:09:04,511 --> 00:09:08,914 Yeah, Burlington! Represent! B-Town, the Queen City. 203 00:09:08,916 --> 00:09:10,649 Big V, baby. 802. 204 00:09:10,651 --> 00:09:12,517 What, you got something to say about Vermont? 205 00:09:12,519 --> 00:09:15,521 'Cause I could introduce you to Ben and Jerry, bitch! 206 00:09:17,324 --> 00:09:21,726 When did you first meet Satan? 207 00:09:21,728 --> 00:09:23,929 I went to my room, and I summoned him. 208 00:09:23,931 --> 00:09:26,065 How did you know how to do that, Caleb? 209 00:09:26,067 --> 00:09:28,533 You know, I think that might have been my fault. 210 00:09:28,535 --> 00:09:32,404 Um, I had a Satanic Bible laying around. 211 00:09:32,406 --> 00:09:35,674 You know, it was my turn to pick the book for book club, 212 00:09:35,676 --> 00:09:38,009 and I thought, "You know what? I'm gonna mix it up." 213 00:09:38,011 --> 00:09:40,745 I mean, that, of course, is like LaVeyan Satanism, 214 00:09:40,747 --> 00:09:44,283 which doesn't assume the existence of a Satanic deity, 215 00:09:44,285 --> 00:09:47,018 but, luckily, there were also some grimoires and stuff, 216 00:09:47,020 --> 00:09:49,354 more like Left Hand Path Satanism, 217 00:09:49,356 --> 00:09:53,092 so I was able to seek out the ancient names of the unholy ones 218 00:09:53,094 --> 00:09:55,560 and make a hallowed verse to call his black name. 219 00:09:55,562 --> 00:09:58,630 See? You can be really smart when you put your mind to it. 220 00:09:58,632 --> 00:10:02,167 My name is Caleb. This is "Itsy Bitsy Spider." 221 00:10:02,169 --> 00:10:04,435 ? The itsy bitsy spider... ? 222 00:10:04,437 --> 00:10:07,106 It's harder than you think finding innocent souls. 223 00:10:07,108 --> 00:10:09,574 Caleb seemed perfect, so I offered him a contract 224 00:10:09,576 --> 00:10:10,976 right on the spot. 225 00:10:13,380 --> 00:10:16,381 What kind of contract did you guys have? 226 00:10:16,383 --> 00:10:19,985 For his soul. You know, it was a boilerplate contract from me. 227 00:10:19,987 --> 00:10:22,187 He wanted to be hugely rich and famous. 228 00:10:22,189 --> 00:10:23,789 Okay. Give me your finger. 229 00:10:23,791 --> 00:10:27,192 This is just gonna be a little bit of an ouchie. 230 00:10:27,194 --> 00:10:28,860 Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. 231 00:10:28,862 --> 00:10:31,530 Uh, the deal would go till he was 30, 232 00:10:31,532 --> 00:10:33,865 and, then, after that, his soul would be mine 233 00:10:33,867 --> 00:10:36,735 and he would be damned to Hell for eternity. 234 00:10:36,737 --> 00:10:41,340 And we have a deal. 235 00:10:41,342 --> 00:10:42,741 Oh! 236 00:10:42,743 --> 00:10:44,609 It was so lit. 237 00:10:44,611 --> 00:10:46,477 ? Itsy bitsy ? 238 00:10:46,479 --> 00:10:48,213 ? Itsy bitsy spider ? 239 00:10:48,215 --> 00:10:51,216 Immediately, my skills got streets ahead. 240 00:10:51,218 --> 00:10:53,686 I became a worldwide phenomenon. 241 00:10:56,690 --> 00:11:00,025 ? Baby Boo, when you left, I went boo-hoo ? 242 00:11:00,027 --> 00:11:01,893 ? I thought our love was forever ? 243 00:11:01,895 --> 00:11:03,895 ? But you left for someone better ? 244 00:11:03,897 --> 00:11:05,964 ? I said Baby Boo ? 245 00:11:05,966 --> 00:11:09,634 ? Oh, when you left, I went boo-hoo ? 246 00:11:09,636 --> 00:11:12,037 ? Oh ? 247 00:11:12,039 --> 00:11:15,707 Alice and I engaged in what I think both of us 248 00:11:15,709 --> 00:11:19,310 agreed would be a very casual relationship. 249 00:11:19,312 --> 00:11:21,446 It wasn't a relationship... It was a... 250 00:11:21,448 --> 00:11:22,981 One night. 251 00:11:22,983 --> 00:11:24,916 Did I do something wrong? No, it was fine. 252 00:11:24,918 --> 00:11:27,318 It was a lovely night. I had a great time. Oh, it was fine. 253 00:11:27,320 --> 00:11:29,188 I had a great time. You hear her? It was fine. 254 00:11:29,190 --> 00:11:31,990 ? Damn, Baby Boo, you got me sick like the flu ? 255 00:11:31,992 --> 00:11:33,925 ? You came between me and my crew ? 256 00:11:33,927 --> 00:11:35,927 ? Poisoned me just like a brew ? 257 00:11:35,929 --> 00:11:37,796 ? You know I thought our love was true ? 258 00:11:37,798 --> 00:11:39,731 ? But what'd you have to go and do? ? 259 00:11:39,733 --> 00:11:43,268 ? You had to go and fall in love with somebody new ? 260 00:11:43,270 --> 00:11:45,937 Everybody thinks it's gonna be forked or something. 261 00:11:45,939 --> 00:11:47,672 I didn't think it was gonna be forked... 262 00:11:47,674 --> 00:11:49,808 I did think maybe it would last longer. 263 00:11:49,810 --> 00:11:54,279 I'm sorry. 264 00:11:54,281 --> 00:11:57,749 Okay, I thought this was gonna be a safe space. 265 00:11:57,751 --> 00:11:59,017 Is this not gonna be a safe space? 266 00:11:59,019 --> 00:12:00,952 We'll move on from that, I guess. 267 00:12:00,954 --> 00:12:02,954 ? Baby, Baby Boo, Boo ? 268 00:12:02,956 --> 00:12:04,756 ? Baby, Baby Boo, Boo ? 269 00:12:04,758 --> 00:12:07,826 ? Baby, Baby, Baby Boo, Boo, Boo ? 270 00:12:07,828 --> 00:12:08,760 ? Baby Boo ? 271 00:12:08,762 --> 00:12:11,162 ? Baby, Baby Boo Baby Boo ? 272 00:12:11,164 --> 00:12:12,631 ? Baby, Baby Boo ? 273 00:12:12,633 --> 00:12:16,101 ? Baby, Baby Boo ? 274 00:12:16,103 --> 00:12:17,703 Then came the albums. 275 00:12:17,705 --> 00:12:19,370 You know, first, there was "Dreamzz." 276 00:12:19,372 --> 00:12:20,972 Mm-hmm. Then there was "Dope." 277 00:12:20,974 --> 00:12:23,308 Mm-hmm. Then there was "Doper than Dope." 278 00:12:23,310 --> 00:12:25,110 "Dope-a-mean." No, no, no. No, brah. 279 00:12:25,112 --> 00:12:27,378 "Dope," "Doper than Dope," "Dopest," "D0P3," 280 00:12:27,380 --> 00:12:30,048 but the "o" is a zero, and the "e" is a 3. 281 00:12:30,050 --> 00:12:32,051 "Dope-a-mean." Oh, yeah. No, no, no. Yeah. 282 00:12:32,053 --> 00:12:34,385 It was "Dope-a-mean," then... then... 283 00:12:34,387 --> 00:12:35,921 How y'all gonna forget about "Dope As I Wanna Be"? 284 00:12:35,923 --> 00:12:38,123 Oh, yeah, "Dope As I Wanna Be." - Come on, man. 285 00:12:38,125 --> 00:12:39,658 Don't act like I don't make hits. 286 00:12:39,660 --> 00:12:42,727 Hey, don't forget about the workout DVD, though. 287 00:12:42,729 --> 00:12:44,596 Oh, my God! What was that called? 288 00:12:44,598 --> 00:12:45,664 "Dope Sweat." 289 00:12:45,666 --> 00:12:48,267 You know you can be anything that you dream, 290 00:12:48,269 --> 00:12:50,201 but, look, there's two parts to every dream... 291 00:12:50,203 --> 00:12:51,803 The believe and the achieve. 292 00:12:51,805 --> 00:12:53,805 I'm gonna help you achieve right now, okay, 293 00:12:53,807 --> 00:12:56,541 to break out of that dumbass body of yours. 294 00:12:56,543 --> 00:12:59,878 5, 6, 7, 8. Sneaky Snake. Sneaky Snake. 295 00:12:59,880 --> 00:13:01,613 It was the number-one instructional 296 00:13:01,615 --> 00:13:05,416 heart-pumping hip-hop abs and cardio DVD ever. 297 00:13:05,418 --> 00:13:07,086 I didn't know you could make money off workout videos, 298 00:13:07,088 --> 00:13:09,354 but, shoot, this thing sold better than the albums. 299 00:13:09,356 --> 00:13:12,557 Most people don't know the crunch is mostly in the butt. 300 00:13:12,559 --> 00:13:15,226 Yeah. Okay, baby twerk. Here we go. 301 00:13:15,228 --> 00:13:19,098 Put your free hand on that shelf. 302 00:13:19,100 --> 00:13:21,500 I was a superstar. Well, I helped. 303 00:13:21,502 --> 00:13:23,702 I know... you did. Okay. 304 00:13:23,704 --> 00:13:27,506 So, why did you always thank God at the awards shows? 305 00:13:27,508 --> 00:13:29,508 I don't know. It's what everybody else did. 306 00:13:29,510 --> 00:13:30,909 Praise God! 307 00:13:30,911 --> 00:13:35,981 I got to give thanks to the OG OG, God. 308 00:13:35,983 --> 00:13:37,983 Praise God. 309 00:13:37,985 --> 00:13:39,450 Man, that's disrespectful as hell. 310 00:13:39,452 --> 00:13:42,287 - Very disrespectful. - What happened next? 311 00:13:44,725 --> 00:13:48,660 I got off the stage in Fresno, and I was super pumped. 312 00:13:48,662 --> 00:13:51,530 I got stopped by Treece, and he tells me to go say hi 313 00:13:51,532 --> 00:13:53,465 to this little messed-up girl named Ava. 314 00:13:53,467 --> 00:13:55,000 Come on, man. Just take a picture real quick. 315 00:13:55,002 --> 00:13:56,935 Why don't you do it? Who'd want to take a picture with me? 316 00:13:56,937 --> 00:13:58,069 Come on, baby. You got this. Let's go. 317 00:13:58,071 --> 00:14:00,739 Caleb, thank you so much for doing this. 318 00:14:00,741 --> 00:14:05,276 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Caleb, Ava. Ava, Caleb. 319 00:14:05,278 --> 00:14:07,146 Hey, what's up? What's your name? 320 00:14:07,148 --> 00:14:08,279 Ava. 321 00:14:08,281 --> 00:14:09,948 Do you have, like, a disease? 322 00:14:09,950 --> 00:14:11,350 Ava was bullied at her school. 323 00:14:11,352 --> 00:14:13,552 They tossed her down a flight of stairs. 324 00:14:13,554 --> 00:14:15,286 Oh, good. 325 00:14:15,288 --> 00:14:18,757 I-I mean, that's great... You're not, like, contagious. 326 00:14:18,759 --> 00:14:20,025 I turned it around. 327 00:14:20,027 --> 00:14:21,960 Oh, word? You [bleep] them up? I'm sorry. No. 328 00:14:21,962 --> 00:14:24,029 Like, went on a mission of vengeance and shit? 329 00:14:24,031 --> 00:14:27,032 Sidebar. No f-word, no s-word. 330 00:14:27,034 --> 00:14:28,767 Hey, maybe take it down, Becky. 331 00:14:28,769 --> 00:14:30,101 I'm trying to reach out to a fan. 332 00:14:30,103 --> 00:14:32,371 You got it. I turned it into a positive. 333 00:14:32,373 --> 00:14:33,839 Um, I started a program at my school 334 00:14:33,841 --> 00:14:35,174 for other students with special needs, 335 00:14:35,176 --> 00:14:37,176 so that way, they won't get bullied, too. 336 00:14:37,178 --> 00:14:39,644 Oh, wow. You really are, like, special. 337 00:14:39,646 --> 00:14:43,382 Not really. I just think it's important to help others. 338 00:14:43,384 --> 00:14:45,250 Put her there, Baby Boo. 339 00:14:45,252 --> 00:14:47,186 Oh! 340 00:14:47,188 --> 00:14:49,120 You had it all. 341 00:14:49,122 --> 00:14:52,191 The big question here is, what happened? 342 00:14:56,730 --> 00:15:00,065 ? Happy birthday to you... ? 343 00:15:00,067 --> 00:15:01,867 It was my 20th birthday. 344 00:15:01,869 --> 00:15:05,804 It was gonna go off, and then Satan comes in, bums me out. 345 00:15:05,806 --> 00:15:07,272 Everybody out. Everybody out. 346 00:15:07,274 --> 00:15:08,339 ? Happy birthday to you ? 347 00:15:08,341 --> 00:15:10,409 Everybody out! 348 00:15:13,346 --> 00:15:15,826 Not you, Caleb. Stay, stay, stay, stay. 349 00:15:18,085 --> 00:15:20,485 All right, look, I got some bad news. 350 00:15:20,487 --> 00:15:21,620 What are you talking about? 351 00:15:21,622 --> 00:15:24,623 The deal's off. I feel terrible about this, 352 00:15:24,625 --> 00:15:27,959 but the truth is, I made a mistake, and I just... 353 00:15:27,961 --> 00:15:31,496 It's me. I just... I cannot take it anymore. 354 00:15:31,498 --> 00:15:34,566 No more singing, no more dancing, okay? 355 00:15:34,568 --> 00:15:38,103 Contract's over. No hard feelings. 356 00:15:38,105 --> 00:15:39,905 I know every generation says 357 00:15:39,907 --> 00:15:42,241 that the previous generation's music 358 00:15:42,243 --> 00:15:46,045 was better than this generation, and I know I've... 359 00:15:46,047 --> 00:15:49,581 Like, for me, I go through that every few hundred years, 360 00:15:49,583 --> 00:15:54,453 where I'm just like, "This century's music is garbage!" 361 00:15:54,455 --> 00:15:58,189 And I felt that way with Caleb. 362 00:15:58,191 --> 00:16:02,060 But... you want my soul. 363 00:16:02,062 --> 00:16:04,129 Ah. This is embarrassing, 364 00:16:04,131 --> 00:16:08,400 but I'm not even sure you have a soul. 365 00:16:11,272 --> 00:16:13,538 I thought that you had my back, man. 366 00:16:13,540 --> 00:16:14,873 I never had your back, 'cause I'm... 367 00:16:14,875 --> 00:16:16,375 You know, 'cause I'm Satan. 368 00:16:20,547 --> 00:16:22,614 Aaahh. 369 00:16:22,616 --> 00:16:26,085 My voice. No! 370 00:16:26,087 --> 00:16:28,019 Ohh. 371 00:16:28,021 --> 00:16:31,356 My moves! What have you done? 372 00:16:31,358 --> 00:16:33,158 Caleb, this was you a second ago. 373 00:16:33,160 --> 00:16:35,094 No! No! "My moves!" 374 00:16:35,096 --> 00:16:36,828 What the hell? 375 00:16:36,830 --> 00:16:38,563 Satan, you're a dick, dude! 376 00:16:38,565 --> 00:16:39,732 Whoa! 377 00:16:42,169 --> 00:16:43,234 I'm the only person in this room 378 00:16:43,236 --> 00:16:46,305 who's been expelled from paradise. 379 00:16:46,307 --> 00:16:47,906 I'm not gonna be the bad guy here. 380 00:16:47,908 --> 00:16:52,177 You're like the bad guy, though. There's not a badder guy. 381 00:16:52,179 --> 00:16:53,512 Treece. Yeah. 382 00:16:53,514 --> 00:16:59,918 When you attack my character, it makes me feel really bad. 383 00:16:59,920 --> 00:17:02,521 Um. Oh, that's what you were talking about before. 384 00:17:02,523 --> 00:17:04,990 Those are blanks to be filled in, like a... 385 00:17:04,992 --> 00:17:06,457 Like a workbook. 386 00:17:06,459 --> 00:17:11,130 What I didn't know is that he was already a narcissist 387 00:17:11,132 --> 00:17:13,532 with a psychopathic personality disorder 388 00:17:13,534 --> 00:17:16,135 before we even started working together. 389 00:17:16,137 --> 00:17:18,670 You sound disappointed. I was. 390 00:17:18,672 --> 00:17:20,339 I'm in the corruption business, 391 00:17:20,341 --> 00:17:23,742 so I can't make bad souls worse be... 392 00:17:23,744 --> 00:17:27,879 Because that's not... That's not a sustain... 393 00:17:27,881 --> 00:17:30,749 That's not a sustainable business model for me. 394 00:17:30,751 --> 00:17:34,886 The world has become... 395 00:17:34,888 --> 00:17:38,757 such a corrupt place. 396 00:17:38,759 --> 00:17:41,360 There's just no... Um. I'm sorry. 397 00:17:41,362 --> 00:17:47,098 There's just no pure souls left, and so, what... what that... 398 00:17:47,100 --> 00:17:49,434 So we made a deal... 399 00:17:49,436 --> 00:17:53,972 If I could find him one pure soul, 400 00:17:53,974 --> 00:17:56,575 then I could be rich and famous again. Right. 401 00:17:56,577 --> 00:18:00,045 Listen, Ava, uh, Caleb has told me so much about you, 402 00:18:00,047 --> 00:18:03,182 and I just want to say I'm a fan of you. 403 00:18:03,184 --> 00:18:04,783 I just think you're so incredible, 404 00:18:04,785 --> 00:18:06,251 and I just want to say, like, 405 00:18:06,253 --> 00:18:09,588 I can help you make any of your dreams come true. 406 00:18:09,590 --> 00:18:10,990 All you need to do is tell me 407 00:18:10,992 --> 00:18:15,060 what it is you want more than anything. 408 00:18:15,062 --> 00:18:17,262 I want... 409 00:18:17,264 --> 00:18:18,864 I want my own reality show. 410 00:18:18,866 --> 00:18:20,131 I want to be like a Kardashian, 411 00:18:20,133 --> 00:18:21,733 but on my show, I'll have on contestants, 412 00:18:21,735 --> 00:18:24,536 and each week, I get to vote the losers off. 413 00:18:24,538 --> 00:18:26,205 So that's how both of your careers ended. 414 00:18:26,207 --> 00:18:27,873 Yeah. Yeah. 415 00:18:27,875 --> 00:18:29,274 Ended my career, too. 416 00:18:29,276 --> 00:18:31,276 Don't care. What happened to Ava? 417 00:18:31,278 --> 00:18:34,012 She actually ended up with her own reality show, 418 00:18:34,014 --> 00:18:35,747 but the funny thing is, I had nothing to do with it. 419 00:18:35,749 --> 00:18:36,681 It was Mark Burnett... 420 00:18:36,683 --> 00:18:39,818 He will literally put anyone on television. 421 00:18:39,820 --> 00:18:44,023 Wow. I think there is no denying it... 422 00:18:44,025 --> 00:18:47,158 There's a lot of love in this room right now, 423 00:18:47,160 --> 00:18:51,697 and I think it would be a shame to let it go to waste. 424 00:18:54,367 --> 00:18:55,534 Yeah. 425 00:18:59,240 --> 00:19:00,439 What the hell? 426 00:19:02,776 --> 00:19:05,244 ? Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa ? 427 00:19:05,246 --> 00:19:07,246 Oh, my God! 428 00:19:07,248 --> 00:19:09,714 My voice is back! Yo! 429 00:19:09,716 --> 00:19:11,049 Let's make a record, baby! 430 00:19:11,051 --> 00:19:12,984 - Wow! -Talkin' about! - Yes! 431 00:19:12,986 --> 00:19:14,720 - No consequences! - Yeah, boy. 432 00:19:14,722 --> 00:19:15,722 Bam! 433 00:19:17,290 --> 00:19:18,690 Ooh, yeah. 434 00:19:18,692 --> 00:19:19,691 - Oh, yeah, I like that. - The grown-man music, man. 435 00:19:19,693 --> 00:19:21,226 - Yeah. Grown-man music. - Let 'em feel it. 436 00:19:21,228 --> 00:19:22,093 Let 'em feel it. Come from here, baby. 437 00:19:22,095 --> 00:19:23,294 All right, here we go. Let's go. 438 00:19:23,296 --> 00:19:24,563 Quiet storm. 439 00:19:24,565 --> 00:19:28,500 ? I texted you... You ain't text back ? 440 00:19:28,502 --> 00:19:31,102 ? Oh, no, I thought I was the mack ? 441 00:19:31,104 --> 00:19:32,504 Unh! 442 00:19:32,506 --> 00:19:33,572 ? I got in touch ? 443 00:19:33,574 --> 00:19:36,375 ? That ain't how... How it's supposed to be ? 444 00:19:36,377 --> 00:19:38,777 ? How'd you act like that, girl, when you ghosted me? ? 445 00:19:38,779 --> 00:19:40,245 - Ghost, boy. - Yeah. 446 00:19:40,247 --> 00:19:43,782 ? How'd you act like that, girl, when you ghosted me? ? 447 00:19:43,784 --> 00:19:46,985 ? How'd you act like that, girl, when you ghosted me? ? 448 00:19:46,987 --> 00:19:48,520 When I get into one of my moods, like, ohh. 449 00:19:48,522 --> 00:19:52,791 Oh, my God. When he is hangry, it is bad news. 450 00:19:52,793 --> 00:19:54,193 It was an earthquake in Chile... 451 00:19:54,195 --> 00:19:55,995 Oh, my God. I know... because I was thinking about chili. 452 00:19:55,997 --> 00:19:58,129 I started bringing crackers everywhere I go. 453 00:19:58,131 --> 00:19:59,398 It's like being with a pregnant woman. 454 00:19:59,400 --> 00:20:01,400 I'm like, "Here. Have a cracker. You're getting crabby." 455 00:20:01,402 --> 00:20:03,935 "People are gonna die if you don't eat a cracker." Okay. Okay. 456 00:20:11,144 --> 00:20:12,411 I don't know what happened to the dude. 457 00:20:12,413 --> 00:20:14,413 Somebody said he missing or something. 458 00:20:14,415 --> 00:20:16,415 I don't know what happened with that. 459 00:20:16,417 --> 00:20:19,350 What I can say is that Trent got out of pocket, 460 00:20:19,352 --> 00:20:21,887 and, you know, if you invade people's space, 461 00:20:21,889 --> 00:20:25,557 then, some people are gonna invade back. 462 00:20:25,559 --> 00:20:29,094 A contract is a contract, but lest we never forget... 463 00:20:29,096 --> 00:20:30,829 The devil is evil. 464 00:20:30,831 --> 00:20:33,632 And though he... Whoa. Seriously, Trent? 465 00:20:33,634 --> 00:20:36,035 Trent, the director from the documentary, died. 466 00:20:36,037 --> 00:20:38,770 Yeah, I know. I killed him. 467 00:20:38,772 --> 00:20:41,573 Well, I did... Aah! Aah! 468 00:20:41,575 --> 00:20:44,043 Aaah! 469 00:20:44,045 --> 00:20:49,114 I'm definitely not proud of it, but... 470 00:20:49,116 --> 00:20:50,982 I did it. 471 00:21:01,662 --> 00:21:04,195 Rolling. 472 00:21:04,197 --> 00:21:08,133 As a storyteller, I love trying to tackle different genres. 473 00:21:08,135 --> 00:21:10,001 If I had to describe this episode, 474 00:21:10,003 --> 00:21:12,337 it is a Faustian tale, 475 00:21:12,339 --> 00:21:17,609 but in the world of "Spinal Tap" or "What We Do in the Shadows." 476 00:21:17,611 --> 00:21:20,812 This one was us trying to tackle a mockumentary. 477 00:21:20,814 --> 00:21:23,214 Am I the only one that hears a leaf blower or what? 478 00:21:23,216 --> 00:21:24,416 Cut! 479 00:21:24,418 --> 00:21:28,487 One of the challenges was to make it look crappy. 480 00:21:28,489 --> 00:21:31,356 This one is, by far, the least sculpted show. 481 00:21:31,358 --> 00:21:33,158 Really? But I think it's stylized. 482 00:21:33,160 --> 00:21:35,160 But it feels really great. Yeah. 483 00:21:35,162 --> 00:21:37,296 I think you did a great job. So maybe we should be... 484 00:21:37,298 --> 00:21:39,230 You know, plan to do crappier work more often. 485 00:21:39,232 --> 00:21:41,166 Maybe we should just try to phone it in more. 486 00:21:41,168 --> 00:21:42,701 I think that's a good plan. 487 00:21:42,703 --> 00:21:45,370 Let's do it. 1, 2, 3, 4. 488 00:21:45,372 --> 00:21:47,439 Dip it low and pop, pop. 489 00:21:47,441 --> 00:21:50,241 Obviously, people will see this and think Justin Bieber, 490 00:21:50,243 --> 00:21:53,712 but it really was more a skewering of pop stars. 491 00:21:53,714 --> 00:21:58,049 But, then, the other influence was the Metallica documentary, 492 00:21:58,051 --> 00:21:59,318 "Some Kind of Monster." Right. 493 00:21:59,320 --> 00:22:01,586 'Cause they all end up in group therapy. 494 00:22:01,588 --> 00:22:03,922 How about we play a game? How about we role-play? 495 00:22:03,924 --> 00:22:05,324 You play Satan. 496 00:22:05,326 --> 00:22:08,727 I think part of us making pictures is often group therapy. 497 00:22:08,729 --> 00:22:09,928 It's group therapy. 498 00:22:09,930 --> 00:22:14,933 Behold. It is I, the Dark Lord of the Abyss. 499 00:22:14,935 --> 00:22:17,602 It was really fun. The cast was really great. 500 00:22:17,604 --> 00:22:20,271 The director's got a bit of a 'tude, 501 00:22:20,273 --> 00:22:22,273 but the cast was great, 502 00:22:22,275 --> 00:22:23,875 and there was a lot of improvising, 503 00:22:23,877 --> 00:22:25,076 which was really fun. 504 00:22:25,078 --> 00:22:28,547 Yeah, I took a photo of my lady parts. 505 00:22:28,549 --> 00:22:31,950 Can we move off this topic of conversation? 506 00:22:31,952 --> 00:22:35,020 One of the fun things about working on this show 507 00:22:35,022 --> 00:22:38,089 was the script was meaningless. 508 00:22:38,091 --> 00:22:39,624 Uncalled for. No... No offense. 509 00:22:39,626 --> 00:22:42,627 You dress like a Canadian Montessori School teacher. 510 00:22:43,764 --> 00:22:45,564 We both can tell truths. 511 00:22:45,566 --> 00:22:49,568 And then Bobcat's like, "Well, just say whatever." 512 00:22:49,570 --> 00:22:51,970 And I'm like, "Well, that's the sign of a true auteur." 513 00:22:51,972 --> 00:22:54,105 He really just doesn't give a shit." 514 00:22:56,309 --> 00:22:58,910 Repeat after me, dude... "Ma." Ma. 515 00:22:58,912 --> 00:22:59,978 "Dukes." Ma Dukes. 516 00:22:59,980 --> 00:23:02,514 No. Dude, you would [bleep] up a wet dream. 517 00:23:02,516 --> 00:23:03,915 Anybody ever told you that? 518 00:23:03,917 --> 00:23:05,917 I just tried to play him as though he just got hit 519 00:23:05,919 --> 00:23:08,920 on the head with a hammer. 520 00:23:08,922 --> 00:23:10,922 I thought that you had my back, man. 521 00:23:10,924 --> 00:23:11,857 I never had your back, 522 00:23:11,859 --> 00:23:13,458 'cause I'm... You know, 'cause I'm Satan. 523 00:23:13,460 --> 00:23:15,594 You're a sheisty-ass back-stabber. Okay? 524 00:23:15,596 --> 00:23:17,796 Michael Ian Black. Jill Talley. 525 00:23:19,266 --> 00:23:20,732 Dave Pasquesi. 526 00:23:20,734 --> 00:23:23,334 Um, do you prefer to be called "Satan"? 527 00:23:23,336 --> 00:23:25,804 All these people are amazing improvisers and comedians. 528 00:23:25,806 --> 00:23:27,206 Help me understand, Treece. 529 00:23:27,208 --> 00:23:29,274 Help you understand what... How waffles are made? 530 00:23:29,276 --> 00:23:31,476 Little bit of dough, little flour, sugar. 531 00:23:31,478 --> 00:23:33,945 This is the most fun I've ever had doing anything. I know, right? 532 00:23:33,947 --> 00:23:35,346 Y'all don't know about the baking soda, do you? 533 00:23:35,348 --> 00:23:36,415 You're supposed to put baking soda and make it fluffy. 534 00:23:36,417 --> 00:23:40,351 You don't even know about that, do you? 535 00:23:40,353 --> 00:23:41,953 There was something really electric 536 00:23:41,955 --> 00:23:43,222 that was happening all the time. 537 00:23:43,224 --> 00:23:45,490 I think the best moments in television or film 538 00:23:45,492 --> 00:23:47,426 are what I like to call, like, lucky accidents. 539 00:23:47,428 --> 00:23:50,361 And fortunately, with my ineptness, 540 00:23:50,363 --> 00:23:52,031 there's always a lot of accidents going on. 541 00:23:52,033 --> 00:23:54,833 All the time. I like these trees. We should shoot... 542 00:23:54,835 --> 00:23:56,568 I thought I told you to [bleep] off. 543 00:23:56,570 --> 00:23:58,369 - Cut. - I always have you 544 00:23:58,371 --> 00:24:00,572 playing jerks, but you're one of the nicest people I know. 545 00:24:00,574 --> 00:24:02,908 Douche, dumb, and dick... That's my wheelhouse. 546 00:24:02,910 --> 00:24:04,576 That's what my wife tells me. 547 00:24:04,578 --> 00:24:06,711 Caleb, I know you're in there! 548 00:24:06,713 --> 00:24:08,379 What do you have against Trent's character? 549 00:24:08,381 --> 00:24:10,982 I don't like documentary filmmakers. 550 00:24:12,386 --> 00:24:16,655 This is just... Oh! I want to catch it. 551 00:24:16,657 --> 00:24:18,457 Aah! 552 00:24:18,459 --> 00:24:20,592 My passion is condemning souls to hell. 553 00:24:20,594 --> 00:24:22,861 Aaah! 554 00:24:22,863 --> 00:24:24,930 Honestly, I've rediscovered my passion for my work, 555 00:24:24,932 --> 00:24:26,132 and I've never been happier. 556 00:24:26,158 --> 00:24:31,563 CREDITS