1 00:00:00,049 --> 00:00:05,114 I highly doubt I'm the first person to say this but... love is complicated. 2 00:00:05,116 --> 00:00:06,482 When you're in love, 3 00:00:06,540 --> 00:00:08,383 you see things differently than everyone else. 4 00:00:12,189 --> 00:00:15,958 _ 5 00:00:20,124 --> 00:00:22,564 I thought you said you were over Nori. 6 00:00:22,566 --> 00:00:23,933 I am. We're just friends. 7 00:00:23,965 --> 00:00:26,165 You're totally still seeing her in slow-mo. 8 00:00:26,167 --> 00:00:27,500 I can tell because you've been trying 9 00:00:27,535 --> 00:00:30,104 to open Joey Zinman's locker for five minutes. 10 00:00:31,156 --> 00:00:31,970 Sorry. 11 00:00:33,507 --> 00:00:35,274 And when love goes away 12 00:00:35,276 --> 00:00:37,109 it can take you a long time to get over it. 13 00:00:37,111 --> 00:00:38,978 _ 14 00:00:38,980 --> 00:00:41,246 - Hey, Alex. - Oh. 15 00:00:41,248 --> 00:00:42,681 Good, my razors are here. 16 00:00:42,683 --> 00:00:44,616 Don't you dare shave that beard. 17 00:00:44,618 --> 00:00:46,085 Fine, just the legs. 18 00:00:47,621 --> 00:00:49,788 - Have a good one, Alex. - You too, Susan. 19 00:00:52,727 --> 00:00:54,793 Dude, why don't you ask her out? 20 00:00:54,795 --> 00:00:56,261 That woman flirts with you 21 00:00:56,263 --> 00:00:57,863 every time she delivers a package. 22 00:00:57,865 --> 00:00:59,398 Oh, she was not flirting with me. 23 00:00:59,400 --> 00:01:01,066 Trust me, she is. 24 00:01:01,068 --> 00:01:02,501 You just can't see it because you've been 25 00:01:02,503 --> 00:01:03,936 closed off ever since the divorce. 26 00:01:03,938 --> 00:01:05,104 We talked about this man. 27 00:01:05,106 --> 00:01:06,405 I'm just not ready yet. 28 00:01:06,407 --> 00:01:07,663 Well, you better get ready for it 29 00:01:07,709 --> 00:01:09,475 because I'm about to order some light bulbs, 30 00:01:09,477 --> 00:01:11,610 and, yes, I'm paying extra 31 00:01:11,612 --> 00:01:14,013 for overnight delivery. 32 00:01:16,784 --> 00:01:18,417 Sometimes the pursuit of love 33 00:01:18,419 --> 00:01:20,953 makes you do things you never thought you would. 34 00:01:21,188 --> 00:01:22,188 _ 35 00:01:22,189 --> 00:01:24,390 - Go on, press another one. - I don't have time for this. 36 00:01:24,392 --> 00:01:26,325 I have to get my house ready for the fundraiser. 37 00:01:26,327 --> 00:01:28,127 Plus, these dating sites are stupid. 38 00:01:28,129 --> 00:01:31,964 Hey, this isn't some old-fashioned, cheesy dating site like Tinder. 39 00:01:31,966 --> 00:01:33,599 This is a highly sophisticated service 40 00:01:33,601 --> 00:01:35,267 that uses advanced algorithms 41 00:01:35,269 --> 00:01:36,802 to help you make a meaningful connection. 42 00:01:36,804 --> 00:01:38,871 Now press her face so we can judge her. 43 00:01:41,575 --> 00:01:43,609 - Hi, I'm Debbie. - Bye, Debbie. 44 00:01:43,611 --> 00:01:45,711 What was wrong with her? 45 00:01:46,284 --> 00:01:47,813 I didn't like the way she said "hi." 46 00:01:47,815 --> 00:01:50,549 You're not giving anyone a chance because you're still stuck on Eleanor. 47 00:01:50,551 --> 00:01:52,951 I am not stuck on Eleanor. 48 00:01:52,953 --> 00:01:55,287 I just like the way she says hi. 49 00:01:57,058 --> 00:01:59,391 Fine, I'll give Debbie another chance. 50 00:02:00,395 --> 00:02:01,360 I love a night out 51 00:02:01,362 --> 00:02:04,129 on the town or staying in, curling up with a good book. 52 00:02:04,131 --> 00:02:05,831 Uch. 53 00:02:05,833 --> 00:02:07,066 She's all over the map. 54 00:02:07,068 --> 00:02:08,934 Debbie, come on, pick a lane. 55 00:02:08,936 --> 00:02:11,503 So, I guess the bottom line is... 56 00:02:11,505 --> 00:02:14,606 I hate love. 57 00:02:22,592 --> 00:02:24,293 And the best part about being an inventor 58 00:02:24,298 --> 00:02:27,064 is that when you see a problem, you get to fix it. 59 00:02:27,066 --> 00:02:29,333 And the only problem I see today... 60 00:02:29,335 --> 00:02:32,536 is that you guys don't have any candy. 61 00:02:33,873 --> 00:02:34,805 Wow. 62 00:02:34,858 --> 00:02:39,543 Ladies and gentlemen, introducing the Riley Industries Candy-Pult 5000, 63 00:02:39,545 --> 00:02:41,478 patent pending. 64 00:02:46,619 --> 00:02:49,152 Thank you Mr. Riley for that wonderful presentation, 65 00:02:49,154 --> 00:02:52,456 and for giving a bunch of eight year olds sugar, then leaving. 66 00:02:52,458 --> 00:02:54,525 - Great job, Dad. - Thank you, sweetie. 67 00:02:54,527 --> 00:02:56,260 Now we're gonna hear from Jasmine's dad, 68 00:02:56,262 --> 00:02:58,795 and he's gonna tell us about his job. 69 00:02:59,535 --> 00:03:00,764 I thought we agreed no candy. 70 00:03:00,766 --> 00:03:02,799 Now all I got is this damn PowerPoint. 71 00:03:02,801 --> 00:03:04,131 Come on, man, you're gonna be great. 72 00:03:04,136 --> 00:03:06,303 Kids love detailed business plans. 73 00:03:07,206 --> 00:03:09,940 Hey, man, that thing packs some power. 74 00:03:09,942 --> 00:03:11,508 Caught a Smartie way back here. 75 00:03:11,510 --> 00:03:13,243 Oh, yeah, it can launch a Skittle 50 yards. 76 00:03:13,245 --> 00:03:15,145 It can launch a peanut M&M 50 yards. 77 00:03:15,147 --> 00:03:17,347 50 yards seems to be the range. 78 00:03:17,349 --> 00:03:18,682 Hey, you one of the new dads? 79 00:03:18,684 --> 00:03:20,350 - I'm Alex. - Oh, hey. Ben. 80 00:03:20,352 --> 00:03:22,319 Hey. Gosh, you look so familiar to me. 81 00:03:22,321 --> 00:03:23,787 Do I know you from somewhere? 82 00:03:23,789 --> 00:03:25,322 I was just thinking the same thing. 83 00:03:25,324 --> 00:03:26,757 Do you workout at Crossfit Glendale? 84 00:03:30,957 --> 00:03:32,362 Oh, you were serious. No. 85 00:03:32,364 --> 00:03:33,864 No, that's not me. 86 00:03:33,866 --> 00:03:35,866 That's why we always want to be conservative 87 00:03:35,868 --> 00:03:37,534 with our quarterly projections. 88 00:03:40,105 --> 00:03:41,605 Damn it, Alex. 89 00:03:43,142 --> 00:03:44,341 Hey, little bro. 90 00:03:44,343 --> 00:03:46,717 I think I have the perfect plan to get you and Nori together. 91 00:03:46,812 --> 00:03:48,511 Well, it's not going to be worse than your last plan 92 00:03:48,514 --> 00:03:50,380 - to get us together. - Again... 93 00:03:50,382 --> 00:03:52,149 You were supposed to eat a mint then kiss her. 94 00:03:52,151 --> 00:03:53,850 Not choke on a mint and spit it into her mouth 95 00:03:53,852 --> 00:03:55,652 like you were feeding a baby bird. 96 00:03:55,654 --> 00:03:57,321 What if I told you there was a day 97 00:03:57,323 --> 00:03:59,356 where the rules of school do not apply? 98 00:03:59,358 --> 00:04:02,426 Where everything that happened in the past no longer matters? 99 00:04:02,428 --> 00:04:05,996 I speak, of course, of the field trip. 100 00:04:06,694 --> 00:04:07,798 Oh. 101 00:04:07,800 --> 00:04:09,866 You guys got a field trip coming up? 102 00:04:09,868 --> 00:04:12,235 I used to love field trips, you know. 103 00:04:12,237 --> 00:04:14,571 It's not school. It's not home. 104 00:04:14,573 --> 00:04:16,840 It's the wild west out there where anything can happen, 105 00:04:16,842 --> 00:04:19,142 - and often does. - Exactly. 106 00:04:19,144 --> 00:04:21,044 You know Josh Hubbard and Kristina Wiggins? 107 00:04:21,046 --> 00:04:23,313 Yeah, the couple who are basically joined at the tongue? 108 00:04:23,315 --> 00:04:26,216 Well, last year Josh was a geek and Kristina was a cheerleader. 109 00:04:26,218 --> 00:04:27,985 He was nowhere on her radar. 110 00:04:27,987 --> 00:04:30,487 Then one visit to the Colonial Farming Museum later, 111 00:04:30,489 --> 00:04:32,255 they're practically married. 112 00:04:32,257 --> 00:04:34,057 Classic field trip love story. 113 00:04:34,059 --> 00:04:35,425 See? 114 00:04:35,427 --> 00:04:37,060 - Okay, I'm in. - Yes. 115 00:04:37,062 --> 00:04:38,695 Yeah, when I was in the seventh grade, 116 00:04:38,697 --> 00:04:41,398 my school went to the American Heritage Museum. 117 00:04:41,400 --> 00:04:43,967 I ended up making out with Lori Shooter 118 00:04:43,969 --> 00:04:45,636 next to a stuffed bison. 119 00:04:45,638 --> 00:04:47,404 Was she the cutest girl in school? 120 00:04:47,406 --> 00:04:49,806 She was not. 121 00:04:49,808 --> 00:04:51,808 I was field tripped. 122 00:04:56,348 --> 00:04:58,248 There are a lot of attractive, charitable women 123 00:04:58,250 --> 00:04:59,816 at this fundraiser. 124 00:04:59,818 --> 00:05:01,652 Maybe even charitable enough to go out with you. 125 00:05:03,122 --> 00:05:04,388 Vodka cranberry, please. 126 00:05:04,390 --> 00:05:06,023 Vodka cranberry, 127 00:05:06,025 --> 00:05:07,724 the drink of sorority girls the world over. 128 00:05:08,491 --> 00:05:09,326 Kelly Frasier. 129 00:05:09,328 --> 00:05:11,261 Surprised to see you in my house. 130 00:05:11,263 --> 00:05:13,263 I didn't notice your broomstick outside. 131 00:05:13,265 --> 00:05:14,798 Oh, this is your house? 132 00:05:14,800 --> 00:05:17,701 I thought it smelled like un-met third quarter projections. 133 00:05:17,703 --> 00:05:19,302 No, that's your perfume. 134 00:05:19,304 --> 00:05:21,505 You... you're the smell. 135 00:05:21,507 --> 00:05:23,407 Ooh, that wasn't your best, Dad. 136 00:05:23,409 --> 00:05:25,142 "Dad"? Is this your daughter? 137 00:05:25,144 --> 00:05:28,979 Kelly, Abby. Abby, evil in human form. 138 00:05:28,981 --> 00:05:31,114 - Hi. - Pleasure to meet you, Abby. 139 00:05:31,116 --> 00:05:32,916 Your father and I go way back. 140 00:05:32,918 --> 00:05:35,118 How long has my company been outperforming yours? 141 00:05:35,120 --> 00:05:36,553 What, 15, 20 years? 142 00:05:36,555 --> 00:05:38,989 No, no that would be never years. 143 00:05:38,991 --> 00:05:40,724 Clever. 144 00:05:40,726 --> 00:05:42,292 Nice to meet you. 145 00:05:44,029 --> 00:05:46,263 I don't think she really thought that was clever. 146 00:05:47,083 --> 00:05:48,131 What is she talking about? 147 00:05:48,133 --> 00:05:51,001 My company has always been just as successful as hers. 148 00:05:51,003 --> 00:05:52,602 I've never seen you so rattled. 149 00:05:52,604 --> 00:05:54,553 Good thing you're retired. You don't have to deal with her anymore. 150 00:05:54,574 --> 00:05:58,442 You're absolutely right. I never have to think about her again. 151 00:05:59,335 --> 00:06:00,888 - Be right back. - Where are you going? 152 00:06:01,380 --> 00:06:04,314 I just thought of a great comeback. 153 00:06:06,118 --> 00:06:09,119 Okay. So we've packed the most tradable snacks, 154 00:06:09,121 --> 00:06:10,787 you're wearing some of my dad's aftershave... 155 00:06:10,789 --> 00:06:12,889 Which burns. It burns bad. 156 00:06:12,891 --> 00:06:14,391 Hey, it roped in your mom. 157 00:06:14,393 --> 00:06:15,826 Not the goal here. 158 00:06:15,828 --> 00:06:17,461 Just... what's next on your list? 159 00:06:17,463 --> 00:06:19,296 Okay, item number three on the list... 160 00:06:19,298 --> 00:06:20,831 "Sit next to Nori on the bus." 161 00:06:20,833 --> 00:06:23,166 Okay, sitting. I can do that. 162 00:06:23,168 --> 00:06:25,202 I'll just go up to her and say something like... 163 00:06:25,204 --> 00:06:26,870 "Hey, Nori, is this seat taken?" 164 00:06:26,872 --> 00:06:28,705 Load them up! 165 00:06:28,707 --> 00:06:32,075 That's weak, little bro. This is Nori Sterling. 166 00:06:32,077 --> 00:06:36,046 You have to be smooth. More Fresh Prince, less Urkel. 167 00:06:43,222 --> 00:06:44,821 A wave. That's good. 168 00:06:44,823 --> 00:06:46,490 - Now all you have to do is... - Hey, Nori. 169 00:06:46,492 --> 00:06:48,725 Is this seat taken? 170 00:06:48,727 --> 00:06:52,229 No, go ahead. 171 00:06:52,231 --> 00:06:54,498 He stole my line. 172 00:06:54,500 --> 00:06:58,435 Looks like we've got... competition. 173 00:06:59,571 --> 00:07:01,505 Good way to think about it, just like your ABC's. 174 00:07:01,507 --> 00:07:04,241 Airway, breathing, circulation. 175 00:07:04,243 --> 00:07:06,409 Level with me. Was it that bad? 176 00:07:06,411 --> 00:07:08,512 I mean, I would have done a little less 177 00:07:08,514 --> 00:07:11,214 on corporate tax loopholes, but you do you man. 178 00:07:11,216 --> 00:07:12,883 So I'm gonna bring out a buddy of mine. 179 00:07:12,885 --> 00:07:15,218 This is, uh, Rescue Annie, 180 00:07:15,220 --> 00:07:17,854 and now I'm gonna show you how to perform CPR. 181 00:07:17,856 --> 00:07:19,523 God, it's killing me. 182 00:07:19,525 --> 00:07:21,424 Where do I know this guy from? Do you recognize him? 183 00:07:21,426 --> 00:07:23,541 I don't know. Y'all all look the same to me. 184 00:07:23,596 --> 00:07:25,529 So for every 30 compressions... 185 00:07:25,531 --> 00:07:27,063 I do two breaths. 186 00:07:43,315 --> 00:07:44,948 Sarah! 187 00:07:52,324 --> 00:07:53,790 Holy crap. 188 00:07:53,792 --> 00:07:55,759 I know where I know this guy from. 189 00:08:02,617 --> 00:08:05,551 Named after French physicist Léon Foucault, 190 00:08:05,553 --> 00:08:09,188 the pendulum is comprised of a 240 pound ball 191 00:08:09,190 --> 00:08:10,990 held by a 40 foot cable. 192 00:08:10,992 --> 00:08:12,758 Powered by the rotation of the Earth... 193 00:08:12,760 --> 00:08:14,226 Don't worry, little bro. 194 00:08:14,228 --> 00:08:16,795 The bus was only one small part of the plan. 195 00:08:16,797 --> 00:08:19,832 "Step four, stand out and grab Nori's attention 196 00:08:19,834 --> 00:08:20,926 by making the class laugh." 197 00:08:21,068 --> 00:08:22,004 That's really gonna help? 198 00:08:22,070 --> 00:08:23,500 Women love funny dudes. 199 00:08:23,572 --> 00:08:25,938 Have you ever seen Steven Wright's girlfriend? 200 00:08:25,940 --> 00:08:27,306 Schwing! 201 00:08:27,308 --> 00:08:29,308 Quiet, you two. 202 00:08:29,310 --> 00:08:30,810 Because of the Earth's rotation 203 00:08:30,845 --> 00:08:33,386 the pendulum knocks over one of these pegs every 20 minutes. 204 00:08:33,481 --> 00:08:35,047 Now, I know what you're thinking, 205 00:08:35,049 --> 00:08:38,717 but it's science, not magic. 206 00:08:38,719 --> 00:08:40,405 - Yes. - Could you work some magic? 207 00:08:40,488 --> 00:08:42,755 Make the rest of this lecture disappear? 208 00:08:42,770 --> 00:08:45,157 It's like he stole our playbook. 209 00:08:45,159 --> 00:08:45,946 Terrific. 210 00:08:45,961 --> 00:08:48,374 Looks like we got a regular Steven Wright on our hands. 211 00:08:48,463 --> 00:08:51,096 Okay, everyone, follow me. 212 00:08:51,098 --> 00:08:52,825 - Yes? - But I really want 213 00:08:52,834 --> 00:08:54,446 to see the pendulum knock down a peg. 214 00:08:54,535 --> 00:08:57,136 And I really want a job that pays an actual salary. 215 00:08:57,138 --> 00:08:59,305 Follow me. 216 00:08:59,307 --> 00:09:01,507 Did you hear that? I know how to impress Nori. 217 00:09:01,539 --> 00:09:02,838 Watch this. 218 00:09:02,840 --> 00:09:04,206 Hey, Nori! 219 00:09:04,208 --> 00:09:05,150 Check it out. 220 00:09:05,243 --> 00:09:07,843 I think the peg's about to fall. 221 00:09:17,889 --> 00:09:20,256 Uh-oh. 222 00:09:20,258 --> 00:09:21,891 Ow. 223 00:09:21,893 --> 00:09:23,959 Well, at least he got her attention. 224 00:09:29,467 --> 00:09:31,333 Hey, hey, hey, why'd you storm out? 225 00:09:31,335 --> 00:09:33,235 He was just about to break out the shocky paddle things. 226 00:09:33,237 --> 00:09:35,104 That's the guy I caught sleeping with Sarah. 227 00:09:35,106 --> 00:09:36,772 That's the guy that ruined my marriage. 228 00:09:36,774 --> 00:09:37,940 Him? 229 00:09:37,942 --> 00:09:39,442 Are you sure? 230 00:09:42,380 --> 00:09:45,748 Yeah, that's him. God, this is horrible. 231 00:09:45,750 --> 00:09:48,451 I don't want to have to see that guy at drop off every day. 232 00:09:48,453 --> 00:09:51,020 Well, he's going to be there. So like it or not, 233 00:09:51,022 --> 00:09:52,621 you're gonna have to confront him. 234 00:09:52,623 --> 00:09:54,156 Oh, you mean punch him in the face. 235 00:09:54,158 --> 00:09:56,225 No, I mean tell him what he did was wrong. 236 00:09:56,227 --> 00:09:58,294 I don't know, I kind of like your face-punching idea better. 237 00:09:58,296 --> 00:10:00,596 - That wasn't my idea. - Don't be so humble. 238 00:10:00,598 --> 00:10:02,498 Look, all I'm saying is just go up to the guy 239 00:10:02,500 --> 00:10:04,266 and tell him with words 240 00:10:04,268 --> 00:10:06,402 all the things you're feeling right now. 241 00:10:06,404 --> 00:10:07,970 The hurt, the anger, betrayal. 242 00:10:07,972 --> 00:10:09,939 Don't ignore it. Talk to him. 243 00:10:09,941 --> 00:10:12,908 Oh, that's good. Yeah, get him to let his guard down. 244 00:10:12,910 --> 00:10:14,477 So I can punch him in the face. 245 00:10:16,347 --> 00:10:18,280 Morning, Dad. You're not dressed. 246 00:10:18,282 --> 00:10:19,915 I thought we were playing tennis this morning. 247 00:10:19,917 --> 00:10:22,618 - My God, I totally forgot. - No problem. 248 00:10:22,620 --> 00:10:25,054 I'll just grab some coffee while you get ready. 249 00:10:25,056 --> 00:10:27,656 Um, no, I don't think I'm going to play today. 250 00:10:27,658 --> 00:10:29,024 I don't really feel up to it. 251 00:10:29,026 --> 00:10:31,794 Are you still upset because you ran into that horrible woman you hate? 252 00:10:31,796 --> 00:10:33,562 I think he got over it. 253 00:10:36,167 --> 00:10:37,933 Abby... 254 00:10:37,935 --> 00:10:39,702 you remember Kelly. 255 00:10:41,439 --> 00:10:44,406 Wow. Must have been some comeback. 256 00:10:45,134 --> 00:10:46,575 - Coffee? - No, thanks. 257 00:10:46,577 --> 00:10:48,344 - I'm just gonna... - Oh, you want... 258 00:10:48,346 --> 00:10:49,459 - That's okay. - You sure? 259 00:10:49,514 --> 00:10:51,247 - Yep. No. - But. 260 00:10:53,184 --> 00:10:55,718 - Dude, it's your lucky day. - Lucky? 261 00:10:55,720 --> 00:10:58,120 Yeah, I fell in a pit, sprained my wrist, 262 00:10:58,122 --> 00:10:59,955 and totally humiliated myself. 263 00:10:59,957 --> 00:11:03,459 And now you reap the benefits of the sympathy card. 264 00:11:03,461 --> 00:11:05,327 Nobody is going to have sympathy for me. 265 00:11:05,329 --> 00:11:06,762 They're just gonna give me a new nickname. 266 00:11:06,764 --> 00:11:09,798 Wristy... Falls-in-a-pit-guy... 267 00:11:09,800 --> 00:11:11,433 This school is rarely clever. 268 00:11:12,173 --> 00:11:13,235 Falls-in-a-pit-guy. 269 00:11:13,237 --> 00:11:15,271 - This is worse than "Chokey." - No, no. 270 00:11:15,273 --> 00:11:18,007 I overheard Nori say she was totally worried about you. 271 00:11:18,009 --> 00:11:18,928 Really? 272 00:11:19,010 --> 00:11:21,210 So I spoke to her and was able to parlay 273 00:11:21,212 --> 00:11:23,212 that worry into her saving you a seat at the movie. 274 00:11:23,214 --> 00:11:25,080 Cool. 275 00:11:25,082 --> 00:11:27,883 - Thanks, Justin. - You got it, Wristy. 276 00:11:31,422 --> 00:11:33,556 Hey. Where do you think you're going? 277 00:11:33,558 --> 00:11:35,357 Oh, hey, Alex. 278 00:11:35,359 --> 00:11:37,026 I was just heading to my car. 279 00:11:37,028 --> 00:11:38,894 You don't even know who I am, do you? 280 00:11:38,896 --> 00:11:40,663 Oh... I'm sorry. 281 00:11:40,665 --> 00:11:42,431 I thought you said your name was Alex. 282 00:11:42,433 --> 00:11:44,833 It is. I... 283 00:11:46,037 --> 00:11:48,571 Sorry, I thought... I had already planned out something to say. 284 00:11:48,573 --> 00:11:51,273 I didn't think that you were going to say what you did... 285 00:11:51,275 --> 00:11:53,108 Look, the point is 286 00:11:53,110 --> 00:11:56,779 you slept with my wife, and this... is a confrontation. 287 00:11:56,781 --> 00:11:58,080 What? 288 00:11:58,082 --> 00:12:00,049 My wife was Sarah Riley. 289 00:12:01,886 --> 00:12:03,703 Oh, my God. 290 00:12:04,655 --> 00:12:06,255 I swear, I... 291 00:12:06,257 --> 00:12:07,656 I had no idea she was married. 292 00:12:07,658 --> 00:12:09,091 Once I found out, I felt horrible. 293 00:12:09,093 --> 00:12:10,359 Oh, you felt horrible? 294 00:12:10,361 --> 00:12:12,861 I know it's nothing compared to what you went through. 295 00:12:12,863 --> 00:12:14,530 I destroyed your family, 296 00:12:14,532 --> 00:12:16,799 and I have to live with that for the rest of my life. 297 00:12:16,801 --> 00:12:18,267 Oh, so you really didn't know, huh? 298 00:12:18,269 --> 00:12:20,002 I didn't. 299 00:12:20,004 --> 00:12:22,371 I know that doesn't fix things, but... 300 00:12:22,373 --> 00:12:24,139 I really am sorry. 301 00:12:24,141 --> 00:12:26,442 So if you... 302 00:12:26,444 --> 00:12:27,943 If you need to punch me in the face, 303 00:12:27,945 --> 00:12:30,079 punch me in the face. 304 00:12:32,950 --> 00:12:34,984 Well, see, now I don't wanna. I... 305 00:12:37,555 --> 00:12:40,022 Well, I guess this is goodbye. 306 00:12:40,024 --> 00:12:44,059 Um, yeah, or we could, uh, maybe have breakfast. 307 00:12:44,061 --> 00:12:45,761 - Breakfast? - Yeah, breakfast. 308 00:12:45,763 --> 00:12:47,363 You know, first meal of the day. 309 00:12:47,365 --> 00:12:48,964 Sometimes served with orange juice or a mimosa, 310 00:12:48,966 --> 00:12:50,733 or in your case straight vodka. 311 00:12:52,103 --> 00:12:53,869 I just thought this was a... 312 00:12:53,871 --> 00:12:55,804 one night, no breakfast kind of thing. 313 00:12:55,806 --> 00:12:57,740 You know, wham-bam-no-Grand-Slam. 314 00:12:57,974 --> 00:13:00,175 So did I, but... 315 00:13:00,177 --> 00:13:02,945 This was a lot of fun. And I'm starving. 316 00:13:02,947 --> 00:13:05,581 I guess a little breakfast couldn't hurt. 317 00:13:05,583 --> 00:13:07,416 Let's, uh, see what's nearby. 318 00:13:07,418 --> 00:13:10,753 Pull up nearby breakfast restaurants. 319 00:13:10,755 --> 00:13:12,421 Oh, Corky's looks good. 320 00:13:12,423 --> 00:13:15,658 Uh, no. I can't take you there. 321 00:13:15,660 --> 00:13:19,028 - Why, what's at Corky's? - No one. 322 00:13:19,030 --> 00:13:21,063 - Do you have a girlfriend? - No. 323 00:13:21,065 --> 00:13:23,799 Not a girlfriend. Someone I... 324 00:13:23,801 --> 00:13:25,267 like, probably shouldn't. 325 00:13:25,269 --> 00:13:26,735 It's silly. 326 00:13:26,737 --> 00:13:29,438 Are you kidding? This is great. 327 00:13:29,440 --> 00:13:32,675 This is the first time I've genuinely been interested 328 00:13:32,677 --> 00:13:34,943 in you since we ran into each other last night. 329 00:13:34,945 --> 00:13:37,680 Till now you were basically a piece of exercise equipment. 330 00:13:37,682 --> 00:13:39,494 You're sick, you know that? 331 00:13:40,351 --> 00:13:43,118 This is getting my... 332 00:13:43,120 --> 00:13:44,853 competitive juices flowing. 333 00:13:44,855 --> 00:13:48,123 I'm gonna make you forget all about this woman. 334 00:13:48,125 --> 00:13:50,259 Well... 335 00:13:50,261 --> 00:13:52,928 You've already made me forget about breakfast. 336 00:13:52,930 --> 00:13:56,231 - Ow. - What... what's wrong? 337 00:13:56,233 --> 00:13:58,267 An old injury. 338 00:13:58,269 --> 00:14:00,302 How's your wrist? Does it hurt? 339 00:14:00,304 --> 00:14:02,871 Nah, they gave me extra strength Tylenol. 340 00:14:02,873 --> 00:14:04,206 The adult ones. 341 00:14:04,208 --> 00:14:05,808 You know, the kind that firemen take 342 00:14:05,810 --> 00:14:08,043 after they fall off a ladder. 343 00:14:08,045 --> 00:14:09,812 Alex, my man. 344 00:14:09,814 --> 00:14:11,947 - Glad to see you're okay. - Hey, Phil. 345 00:14:11,949 --> 00:14:14,283 I gotta tell you, when I saw you fall in that pit 346 00:14:14,285 --> 00:14:15,984 all I could think of were the horrible nicknames 347 00:14:15,986 --> 00:14:17,553 people were going to call you. 348 00:14:17,555 --> 00:14:20,222 Sprainy... Wristopher... 349 00:14:21,781 --> 00:14:23,826 That one seems to be gathering steam. 350 00:14:23,828 --> 00:14:26,495 - Are you crying? - Don't fall for it, Nori. 351 00:14:26,497 --> 00:14:28,731 He's fake crying so you'll think he's a good guy. 352 00:14:28,733 --> 00:14:30,632 But he seems really upset. 353 00:14:30,634 --> 00:14:31,487 He's not upset. 354 00:14:31,502 --> 00:14:33,121 He's the president of the drama club, 355 00:14:33,204 --> 00:14:35,337 and he's always bragging about having a commercial agent. 356 00:14:35,339 --> 00:14:37,573 I just booked a J.C. Penney spot. 357 00:14:37,575 --> 00:14:39,274 Welcome to the world famous 358 00:14:39,276 --> 00:14:41,910 Los Angeles Science and History Museum. 359 00:14:42,257 --> 00:14:43,746 Our journey begins 360 00:14:43,748 --> 00:14:45,881 - billions of years ago. - Faker. 361 00:14:45,883 --> 00:14:48,183 - I am not, Wristopher. - Shh. 362 00:14:48,185 --> 00:14:49,976 Wristopher? That doesn't even make any sense. 363 00:14:50,021 --> 00:14:52,354 - It's a play on Christopher. - But that's not even my name. 364 00:14:52,356 --> 00:14:55,257 If you want to talk so much, you can do it by yourselves. 365 00:15:01,699 --> 00:15:05,367 She's gone. You don't have to keep fake crying. 366 00:15:05,369 --> 00:15:07,369 My acting coach encourages me 367 00:15:07,371 --> 00:15:09,805 to access the memories of my dead grandma. 368 00:15:11,942 --> 00:15:13,575 Here they come again. 369 00:15:16,614 --> 00:15:18,280 Alex. 370 00:15:18,282 --> 00:15:21,450 How'd your showdown go with the... CPR guy? 371 00:15:21,452 --> 00:15:23,886 You're playing video games with? 372 00:15:23,888 --> 00:15:25,009 Hey, Jasmine's dad. 373 00:15:25,089 --> 00:15:28,190 Can I just say, you have a beautiful home. 374 00:15:28,192 --> 00:15:29,279 Isn't he the sweetest? 375 00:15:29,327 --> 00:15:32,161 - Here's a sweet dunk on you. - No, come on, no. 376 00:15:32,163 --> 00:15:33,429 - Oh. - Oh, shut up. 377 00:15:33,431 --> 00:15:34,797 How are you so good at this? 378 00:15:39,145 --> 00:15:41,975 What the hell is that man doing in my house? 379 00:15:42,010 --> 00:15:43,380 We actually have a lot in common. 380 00:15:43,382 --> 00:15:44,915 Yeah, you both slept with your wife. 381 00:15:44,917 --> 00:15:46,717 Yeah, and he feels terrible about it. 382 00:15:46,719 --> 00:15:47,985 You know he hasn't had a good night's sleep 383 00:15:47,987 --> 00:15:49,620 since it happened. 384 00:15:49,622 --> 00:15:52,289 So that's it, now you're just cool with him? 385 00:15:52,291 --> 00:15:53,824 I feel like you're not dealing with this. 386 00:15:53,826 --> 00:15:55,125 Maybe I don't have to deal with it. 387 00:15:55,127 --> 00:15:56,468 Maybe we can just be friends. 388 00:15:56,563 --> 00:15:58,429 This isn't healthy man. 389 00:16:00,008 --> 00:16:01,031 What is that smell? 390 00:16:01,455 --> 00:16:02,433 Ben brought a banana bread over. 391 00:16:02,435 --> 00:16:04,268 He baked it himself. 392 00:16:09,043 --> 00:16:12,343 Okay, if I have a slice, that does not mean I condone this. 393 00:16:12,345 --> 00:16:14,044 Oh, no, you have to have a slice. 394 00:16:14,046 --> 00:16:15,412 It is stupid good. 395 00:16:15,414 --> 00:16:17,615 I do love me some banana bread. 396 00:16:20,920 --> 00:16:23,320 Hey, Nori. You okay? 397 00:16:23,322 --> 00:16:26,357 What is it about field trips that makes all the boys go bonkers? 398 00:16:26,359 --> 00:16:28,292 I mean, I expected this from other guys 399 00:16:28,294 --> 00:16:29,860 but not Alex. 400 00:16:29,862 --> 00:16:31,962 Don't blame Alex. It's all my fault. 401 00:16:31,964 --> 00:16:34,231 Ever since I gave him the mint at the dance, 402 00:16:34,233 --> 00:16:36,467 you know, the one he choked on and spat into your mouth. 403 00:16:36,469 --> 00:16:38,102 Yeah, I remember. 404 00:16:38,104 --> 00:16:39,770 Well, ever since the Mint-cident, 405 00:16:39,772 --> 00:16:41,572 coined that term myself, 406 00:16:41,574 --> 00:16:43,340 I've trying to make up for it by playing matchmaker. 407 00:16:43,342 --> 00:16:46,143 And when we saw you and Phil Ricozzi sitting together on the bus... 408 00:16:46,145 --> 00:16:47,778 Phil Ricozzi? 409 00:16:47,780 --> 00:16:49,680 I wouldn't be into that guy in a million years. 410 00:16:49,682 --> 00:16:51,248 Have you seen his Plumber King spot? 411 00:16:51,250 --> 00:16:53,183 Yeah, with that stupid slogan. 412 00:16:53,185 --> 00:16:55,753 "Nothing beats a Royal Flush." 413 00:16:58,190 --> 00:17:00,224 Oh, royal flush. 414 00:17:00,226 --> 00:17:01,558 I just got that. 415 00:17:01,560 --> 00:17:03,794 - But still Phil sucked. - Agreed. 416 00:17:05,931 --> 00:17:08,298 Mmm, how's it so moist all the way through? 417 00:17:08,300 --> 00:17:10,768 You know I can give you the recipe. 418 00:17:10,770 --> 00:17:12,403 - Nah, I don't want it. - Oh, my God. 419 00:17:12,405 --> 00:17:13,862 You are killing me. 420 00:17:13,940 --> 00:17:15,839 You haven't missed any three pointers this whole quarter. 421 00:17:15,841 --> 00:17:16,971 How are you so good at this? 422 00:17:16,976 --> 00:17:18,876 My players, you know, they get to bed early. 423 00:17:18,878 --> 00:17:19,760 They eat right. 424 00:17:19,846 --> 00:17:22,680 They are not allowed in that nightclub from Grand Theft Auto. 425 00:17:23,362 --> 00:17:25,416 Oh, and then before the game starts I just press 426 00:17:25,418 --> 00:17:27,885 X, X, square, down, X, circle, circle, circle. 427 00:17:29,188 --> 00:17:31,288 Wait. You use a cheat code? 428 00:17:31,290 --> 00:17:32,790 It's silly, I know. 429 00:17:33,752 --> 00:17:34,658 Wait, so you were cheating? 430 00:17:34,660 --> 00:17:37,895 Oh, come on, if the game lets you do it, it's not really cheating, right? 431 00:17:39,165 --> 00:17:40,831 So let me get this straight. 432 00:17:40,833 --> 00:17:43,500 - You come into my house... - Technically my house. 433 00:17:43,502 --> 00:17:46,003 And without any consideration for anyone else's feelings, 434 00:17:46,005 --> 00:17:47,805 just because you felt like it, you cheated? 435 00:17:47,807 --> 00:17:50,340 Okay, I think I can see where this is going. 436 00:17:50,342 --> 00:17:52,009 Cheater! 437 00:17:53,045 --> 00:17:55,312 I think he's coming to. 438 00:17:57,349 --> 00:17:58,749 Are you okay, man? 439 00:18:03,255 --> 00:18:04,655 What happened? 440 00:18:04,657 --> 00:18:06,390 Well you punched Ben in the face, 441 00:18:06,392 --> 00:18:08,192 and then you screamed, "My wrist!" 442 00:18:08,194 --> 00:18:10,794 Then you fainted like a lady in a Jane Austen novel. 443 00:18:10,796 --> 00:18:12,529 Hey, let me take a look at it, all right? 444 00:18:12,531 --> 00:18:14,098 Sorry, man, I don't know what happened. 445 00:18:14,100 --> 00:18:16,734 I do. You got a lot of repressed aggression 446 00:18:16,736 --> 00:18:18,402 against the guy who slept with your wife, 447 00:18:18,404 --> 00:18:20,270 and I think you needed to get it out. 448 00:18:20,272 --> 00:18:21,739 I did. 449 00:18:21,741 --> 00:18:23,227 I suddenly feel so much better. 450 00:18:23,509 --> 00:18:25,309 Except for my wrist. 451 00:18:25,311 --> 00:18:27,791 - How's your jaw? - It's fine. 452 00:18:28,077 --> 00:18:30,180 You're probably still in shock. 453 00:18:30,182 --> 00:18:31,715 Yeah, that's probably it. 454 00:18:31,717 --> 00:18:33,050 Yeah. 455 00:18:33,052 --> 00:18:34,918 Look, you were right, Darryl. 456 00:18:34,920 --> 00:18:36,720 Ever since the divorce, I've all these feelings 457 00:18:36,722 --> 00:18:38,722 of anger and hurt just bottled up. 458 00:18:38,724 --> 00:18:41,592 It all came out in one ferocious punch like I was a young Mike Tyson. 459 00:18:41,594 --> 00:18:43,193 Well, how young are we talking here? 460 00:18:43,195 --> 00:18:46,163 - Like age 4? - I'm having a moment. 461 00:18:46,165 --> 00:18:49,500 Ben, I appreciate you helping me get to this point, 462 00:18:49,502 --> 00:18:51,602 but I don't think we should be friends. 463 00:18:52,510 --> 00:18:53,837 Totally get it, man. 464 00:18:54,822 --> 00:18:56,099 We had a good run. 465 00:19:00,446 --> 00:19:02,346 I have something else I want to say to that guy. 466 00:19:02,348 --> 00:19:04,114 You want to get that banana bread recipe? 467 00:19:04,116 --> 00:19:07,217 - Just so moist. - So moist. 468 00:19:07,219 --> 00:19:08,685 So let me get this straight. 469 00:19:08,687 --> 00:19:10,120 You could date any of these women. 470 00:19:10,122 --> 00:19:12,189 Or these women. 471 00:19:12,191 --> 00:19:13,791 Or this guy. 472 00:19:13,793 --> 00:19:15,759 How did he sneak in there? 473 00:19:15,761 --> 00:19:19,196 But instead you choose someone you've hated for 20 years. 474 00:19:19,198 --> 00:19:22,232 Hm. I don't know what to tell you. 475 00:19:22,234 --> 00:19:24,768 The heart wants what the heart... 476 00:19:24,770 --> 00:19:26,904 is incredibly annoyed by. 477 00:19:26,906 --> 00:19:29,072 So, you and Kelly, are you guys a thing now? 478 00:19:29,074 --> 00:19:32,042 Don't know. But I like that I like someone. 479 00:19:32,044 --> 00:19:35,112 And I like that it's not Eleanor. 480 00:19:35,114 --> 00:19:36,747 Me too. 481 00:19:39,672 --> 00:19:40,884 You know, this guy's kinda cute. 482 00:19:42,555 --> 00:19:45,756 Hi, I'm Brad, but the ladies call me rad. 483 00:19:45,758 --> 00:19:48,192 Nope. 484 00:19:48,194 --> 00:19:51,495 Sometimes you find love in unexpected places. 485 00:19:51,497 --> 00:19:54,298 But sometimes you just have to let it find you. 486 00:19:55,842 --> 00:19:58,001 Hey, I'm going to the post office. I can take that for you if you want. 487 00:19:58,003 --> 00:19:59,937 Oh, no, thanks, Susan's coming by to pick it up. 488 00:19:59,939 --> 00:20:01,972 - Susan? - What? 489 00:20:01,974 --> 00:20:03,941 I'm just sending a box. 490 00:20:03,943 --> 00:20:06,777 To your parents who live five miles away? 491 00:20:06,779 --> 00:20:09,394 - And with nothing in it? - You're right. 492 00:20:09,429 --> 00:20:11,481 I should probably throw some laundry in there, huh? 493 00:20:11,483 --> 00:20:13,049 I'm proud of you, buddy. 494 00:20:14,854 --> 00:20:18,722 Other times, you're just happy to find out you're still in the game. 495 00:20:20,436 --> 00:20:21,892 Today was a disaster. 496 00:20:21,894 --> 00:20:25,662 Except for one huge piece of information I uncovered. 497 00:20:25,664 --> 00:20:28,031 Nori doesn't like Phil Ricozzi. 498 00:20:28,033 --> 00:20:30,234 She doesn't? God, that's great. 499 00:20:30,236 --> 00:20:32,336 That's one huge rival eliminated. 500 00:20:32,338 --> 00:20:35,973 Yeah, now there's no one left standing in your way, little bro. 501 00:20:35,975 --> 00:20:37,341 No one at all. 502 00:20:49,334 --> 00:20:51,088 Oh, crap. 503 00:20:52,089 --> 00:20:54,089 - synced and corrected by sot26 - www.addic7ed.com