1
00:00:01,039 --> 00:00:03,289
- Hi, Jill, alcoholic.
- Hi, Jill.

2
00:00:03,291 --> 00:00:04,424
Things are good.

3
00:00:04,426 --> 00:00:06,443
I got my 30-day chip yesterday.

4
00:00:06,468 --> 00:00:07,594
Some of y'all weren't there,

5
00:00:07,596 --> 00:00:09,879
so I thought I'd give
you a chance to applaud.

6
00:00:12,851 --> 00:00:15,109
Oh, come on! Carla got more applause

7
00:00:15,134 --> 00:00:17,084
for not sleeping with
her brother-in-law.

8
00:00:19,114 --> 00:00:20,613
Better.

9
00:00:21,411 --> 00:00:24,254
Anyway, my only complaint is,
now that I'm a newcomer again,

10
00:00:24,279 --> 00:00:26,396
I'm not supposed to date for a year.

11
00:00:26,398 --> 00:00:29,678
I mean, the Lamborghini's
gassed up and fully detailed,

12
00:00:29,703 --> 00:00:32,015
but Marjorie won't let me
take it out of the garage.

13
00:00:32,398 --> 00:00:33,620
Give it time.

14
00:00:33,622 --> 00:00:36,031
Vroom-vroom,
Marjorie! Vroom-vroom!

15
00:00:37,184 --> 00:00:39,085
That's all I got.

16
00:00:41,523 --> 00:00:43,630
- Hi, Bonnie, alcoholic.
- Hi, Bonnie.

17
00:00:43,632 --> 00:00:45,498
Some of you may recall my recent share

18
00:00:45,500 --> 00:00:48,251
about my fiance?s
17-year-old dog

19
00:00:48,253 --> 00:00:49,886
crossing over the rainbow bridge.

20
00:00:50,171 --> 00:00:53,156
I wasn't here. What happened?
Dog went gay?

21
00:00:54,680 --> 00:00:56,799
- He died.
- Aw.

22
00:00:56,801 --> 00:01:00,265
Yes "aw," total "aw," justified "aw."

23
00:01:00,638 --> 00:01:02,939
Thankfully, Samson died
peacefully in his sleep

24
00:01:02,941 --> 00:01:04,891
with a big ol' pork chop in his belly.

25
00:01:05,150 --> 00:01:07,210
God knows that's how I want to go.

26
00:01:07,645 --> 00:01:10,062
The problem is, that
was three weeks ago,

27
00:01:10,087 --> 00:01:11,920
and Adam is still devastated.

28
00:01:11,945 --> 00:01:16,539
I am relatively new to this...
What's it called, empathy?

29
00:01:17,914 --> 00:01:20,573
But shouldn't he be through
the five stages of grief by now?

30
00:01:20,575 --> 00:01:23,159
He's not shaving or showering;
he's wearing the same sweatshirt

31
00:01:23,161 --> 00:01:24,494
because it smells like his dog,

32
00:01:24,496 --> 00:01:26,726
which means my fiancé
smells like a dog.

33
00:01:26,751 --> 00:01:30,610
I mean, I want to continue
supporting him, but...

34
00:01:30,635 --> 00:01:33,132
So I will say to you
what I can't say to him.

35
00:01:33,157 --> 00:01:35,741
All dogs go to heaven. Move on!

36
00:01:36,101 --> 00:01:37,804
Thanks.

37
00:01:39,750 --> 00:01:43,125
- Hi, Christy, alcoholic.
- Hi, Christy.

38
00:01:43,681 --> 00:01:46,912
So, I've been having some
trouble with my boyfriend.

39
00:01:46,937 --> 00:01:49,375
Oh, no. They're my Kate and William.

40
00:01:49,938 --> 00:01:52,321
His birthday weekend didn't go well,

41
00:01:52,323 --> 00:01:54,757
so I've been overthinking everything.

42
00:01:55,110 --> 00:01:57,527
He texted me "How ya doin'?"

43
00:01:58,054 --> 00:02:00,534
and I panicked and sent
him an emoji of a cow.

44
00:02:00,559 --> 00:02:02,442
I have no idea what it meant.

45
00:02:03,535 --> 00:02:05,535
Tonight, he wants to Skype,

46
00:02:05,537 --> 00:02:09,367
and I don't know whether it's
a sexy Skype or a breakup Skype.

47
00:02:09,780 --> 00:02:11,992
I mean, what do I wear?

48
00:02:12,567 --> 00:02:16,101
I don't want to be sitting there
in my nipple-less bra when...

49
00:02:17,215 --> 00:02:18,546
he dumps me.

50
00:02:18,933 --> 00:02:20,609
Oh, honey.

51
00:02:21,155 --> 00:02:23,039
Oh, God!

52
00:02:28,726 --> 00:02:30,500
This is empathy, right?

53
00:02:37,385 --> 00:02:41,906
-- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe --
-- www.addic7ed.com --

54
00:02:48,102 --> 00:02:50,052
Hey, honey.

55
00:02:51,584 --> 00:02:52,834
Excuse me.

56
00:02:52,859 --> 00:02:54,859
Are you my fiance?s son?

57
00:02:54,884 --> 00:02:57,132
Because I'm having
some forbidden feelings.

58
00:02:57,745 --> 00:02:59,703
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I showered and shaved.

59
00:02:59,742 --> 00:03:01,435
Clean hair, clean
teeth, clean underwear.

60
00:03:02,722 --> 00:03:04,522
Wait, what's that I smell?

61
00:03:04,524 --> 00:03:07,671
Mmm. It's nothing!

62
00:03:10,015 --> 00:03:13,007
I think I'm ready to wash the
dog bowls and put them away.

63
00:03:13,328 --> 00:03:16,576
Progress. Awesome, I love it.
Why don't you let me do it.

64
00:03:16,601 --> 00:03:18,619
You go watch some TV and just relax.

65
00:03:18,621 --> 00:03:19,904
Thanks, babe.

66
00:03:21,123 --> 00:03:23,765
Hey, I was thinking maybe later
we could go out for dinner.

67
00:03:23,790 --> 00:03:24,923
We could go to that place

68
00:03:24,948 --> 00:03:26,476
where they flip the
shrimp in your mouth.

69
00:03:26,501 --> 00:03:28,084
Yeah, I like that place.

70
00:03:28,202 --> 00:03:30,286
Remember when I caught
one in my cleavage?

71
00:03:30,413 --> 00:03:32,703
Ah, everybody enjoyed that.

72
00:03:41,672 --> 00:03:43,507
This one's got to soak.

73
00:03:44,648 --> 00:03:46,342
He's more than a dog.

74
00:03:46,344 --> 00:03:49,732
He's your best friend.

75
00:03:50,298 --> 00:03:52,492
What are you watching?
What are you watching?

76
00:03:52,517 --> 00:03:54,911
Ah, it's just a stupid commercial.

77
00:03:57,054 --> 00:03:59,828
They're best friends.
They grew up together.

78
00:04:00,252 --> 00:04:03,117
But now he's too old
to jump in the truck.

79
00:04:09,288 --> 00:04:10,621
Hey.

80
00:04:10,911 --> 00:04:12,494
Hey.

81
00:04:12,519 --> 00:04:14,352
Well, I'm not spending
the night at Adam's.

82
00:04:14,377 --> 00:04:16,546
Weepy Sue is back with a vengeance.

83
00:04:17,658 --> 00:04:21,076
I swear I've had all the sadness
I can take for a lifetime.

84
00:04:46,521 --> 00:04:47,922
Oh!

85
00:04:50,440 --> 00:04:53,383
Oh, no. What happened?

86
00:04:54,813 --> 00:04:59,024
It wasn't sexy Skype.
It was breakup Skype.

87
00:04:59,397 --> 00:05:01,364
Oh, honey.

88
00:05:01,389 --> 00:05:03,063
I'm sorry.

89
00:05:03,322 --> 00:05:05,322
At least you dressed appropriately.

90
00:05:06,911 --> 00:05:08,961
I was ready for both.

91
00:05:10,040 --> 00:05:13,257
- Oh, that's pretty.
- Thanks. It's new.

92
00:05:16,050 --> 00:05:18,805
What did Patrick say?

93
00:05:18,830 --> 00:05:21,330
He asked me to go live with him.

94
00:05:21,355 --> 00:05:23,125
He said he would take care of me,

95
00:05:23,150 --> 00:05:25,400
that I wouldn't have to work so much.

96
00:05:25,425 --> 00:05:27,625
That way, we could
spend more time together.

97
00:05:27,650 --> 00:05:30,201
But I said no, so he broke up with me.

98
00:05:30,377 --> 00:05:31,805
Okay.

99
00:05:31,986 --> 00:05:34,040
Why the hell would you say no?

100
00:05:34,902 --> 00:05:37,903
I can't move three hours away.

101
00:05:37,905 --> 00:05:40,840
- I have a life here.
- Ish.

102
00:05:41,748 --> 00:05:45,191
Look, it may not be a great
life, but it is a life.

103
00:05:45,614 --> 00:05:48,732
I'm not ready to just give all that up.

104
00:05:49,250 --> 00:05:52,457
Well, I support you no
matter what, sweetie.

105
00:05:53,480 --> 00:05:54,761
Thanks, Mom.

106
00:05:54,786 --> 00:05:56,419
How 'bout I make you some tea,

107
00:05:56,444 --> 00:05:59,278
and you go watch some TV
and-and get your mind off it.

108
00:05:59,303 --> 00:06:00,801
I'd like that.

109
00:06:05,027 --> 00:06:06,996
What are you doing to me?

110
00:06:09,035 --> 00:06:12,261
We now return to Love Actually.

111
00:06:14,377 --> 00:06:15,980
Nope.

112
00:06:19,318 --> 00:06:21,691
- So how's Adam doing?
- Not great.

113
00:06:21,716 --> 00:06:24,574
Last night, I made him hot
dogs and he burst into tears.

114
00:06:24,599 --> 00:06:27,183
I mean, that is a
whisper-thin connection.

115
00:06:27,505 --> 00:06:29,207
Bonnie, everybody takes
a different amount of time

116
00:06:29,232 --> 00:06:30,615
to process grief.

117
00:06:30,822 --> 00:06:32,906
I know the guy's
hurting, and I love him,

118
00:06:32,931 --> 00:06:35,660
but sweet mother of pearl, this is hard.

119
00:06:35,994 --> 00:06:38,581
I give him tissues, I
hold him, I make him soup.

120
00:06:38,606 --> 00:06:41,027
And what is the deal
with sad people and soup?

121
00:06:41,052 --> 00:06:42,502
He can't get enough soup.

122
00:06:42,527 --> 00:06:44,527
It's too depressing when animals die.

123
00:06:44,552 --> 00:06:46,019
It's why I couldn't become a vet.

124
00:06:46,484 --> 00:06:49,452
And yet you became an
emergency room nurse.

125
00:06:49,735 --> 00:06:51,199
What's your point?

126
00:06:51,708 --> 00:06:55,470
I think it's sexy when a man's
in touch with his emotions.

127
00:06:55,651 --> 00:06:59,236
Victor cried when my
calico Janis Joplin died.

128
00:06:59,261 --> 00:07:02,119
We made love with the
lights on that night.

129
00:07:06,377 --> 00:07:09,024
Oh, look! Christy's here.

130
00:07:09,049 --> 00:07:10,205
Hey!

131
00:07:10,437 --> 00:07:11,937
Hey, guys.

132
00:07:12,432 --> 00:07:14,014
I'm so sorry, Christy.

133
00:07:14,039 --> 00:07:16,119
I really thought you and
Patrick were gonna make it.

134
00:07:16,144 --> 00:07:17,860
Thanks, Wendy.

135
00:07:17,885 --> 00:07:20,627
At least it was a healthy
end to a healthy relationship.

136
00:07:24,345 --> 00:07:26,908
Healthiest relationship I've ever had.

137
00:07:27,258 --> 00:07:29,884
Did he actually use the
words "I'll take care of you"?

138
00:07:30,351 --> 00:07:31,869
- He did.
- What's wrong with you?!

139
00:07:31,894 --> 00:07:33,260
I don't know!

140
00:07:34,799 --> 00:07:36,632
You know what, Christy,
I have got just the thing

141
00:07:36,657 --> 00:07:38,023
to take your mind off your troubles.

142
00:07:38,892 --> 00:07:42,361
Jill, again, I don't
want to steam my vagina.

143
00:07:43,073 --> 00:07:45,392
Okay, you didn't give that a chance.

144
00:07:46,542 --> 00:07:49,650
But what I'm thinking
is we go to San Francisco

145
00:07:49,675 --> 00:07:52,426
and shop until that hole in
your heart is full with Gucci.

146
00:07:52,451 --> 00:07:53,713
That is so kind, but...

147
00:07:53,738 --> 00:07:55,575
Christy, you have
always been there for me.

148
00:07:55,600 --> 00:07:56,816
Let me do this for you.

149
00:07:57,638 --> 00:07:58,986
Well...

150
00:07:59,580 --> 00:08:01,547
I have always wanted to know

151
00:08:01,549 --> 00:08:04,048
what it feels like to just
throw money at a problem.

152
00:08:04,495 --> 00:08:08,377
Trust me, it'll get you all
tingly like a steamed vagina.

153
00:08:09,361 --> 00:08:12,369
Ooh, we're going shopping!

154
00:08:12,394 --> 00:08:14,420
No, just Christy.

155
00:08:14,445 --> 00:08:15,978
She's the one who's upset.

156
00:08:17,009 --> 00:08:20,142
I don't know if you've heard,
but my fiance?s dog just died.

157
00:08:25,969 --> 00:08:29,971
Aw, there you are,
right where I left you.

158
00:08:30,544 --> 00:08:31,853
Hey.

159
00:08:32,186 --> 00:08:34,634
I've heard one way to
raise a man's spirits

160
00:08:34,659 --> 00:08:37,408
is to bring a third party
into the relationship.

161
00:08:37,777 --> 00:08:41,134
I'm not in the mood for... Is
it Louise from Trader Joe's?

162
00:08:43,518 --> 00:08:44,963
Close.

163
00:08:44,988 --> 00:08:47,166
It's a puppy!

164
00:08:50,494 --> 00:08:53,244
And he's from the Third Street Shelter.

165
00:08:53,567 --> 00:08:54,744
Bonnie, what are you doing?

166
00:08:54,769 --> 00:08:57,296
I'm trying to hand you an adorable puppy

167
00:08:57,321 --> 00:08:59,469
that will make you
happy. You're welcome.

168
00:08:59,494 --> 00:09:01,548
I-I'm not, I'm not gonna take him.

169
00:09:01,573 --> 00:09:03,073
But, honey, he's got puppy breath

170
00:09:03,098 --> 00:09:04,939
and he wants you to be his new daddy.

171
00:09:07,338 --> 00:09:09,416
Look, I appreciate what
you're trying to do,

172
00:09:09,441 --> 00:09:11,267
but I-I'm not ready for another dog.

173
00:09:11,292 --> 00:09:13,004
Why not? You've got those clean bowls.

174
00:09:13,029 --> 00:09:14,181
You're halfway there.

175
00:09:14,206 --> 00:09:16,182
I'm still grieving over Samson.

176
00:09:16,207 --> 00:09:18,877
- It's only been a couple of weeks.
- 23 days.

177
00:09:18,902 --> 00:09:20,986
Bonnie, listen to me.

178
00:09:21,688 --> 00:09:25,478
I know to you I only lost a
dog, but to me, I lost a friend

179
00:09:25,503 --> 00:09:28,087
that got me through the
roughest time in my life.

180
00:09:28,153 --> 00:09:30,069
Well, you're gonna
have more rough times.

181
00:09:30,094 --> 00:09:32,517
I mean, you are marrying me.

182
00:09:33,479 --> 00:09:36,062
And maybe this little fella can help.

183
00:09:36,393 --> 00:09:38,477
I mean, I got stuck
behind a garbage truck

184
00:09:38,479 --> 00:09:40,195
on my way over here, narrow street,

185
00:09:40,197 --> 00:09:42,011
no way to get around
him, and I glance over,

186
00:09:42,036 --> 00:09:45,683
and this guy is giving me
a very encouraging look.

187
00:09:50,918 --> 00:09:52,551
Made a difference.

188
00:09:52,576 --> 00:09:54,753
Just flipped a switch right in here.

189
00:09:56,128 --> 00:09:58,839
Take the dog and-and just go.

190
00:10:00,094 --> 00:10:01,594
Are you serious?

191
00:10:01,863 --> 00:10:03,425
Yeah.

192
00:10:04,153 --> 00:10:05,403
Fine.

193
00:10:14,116 --> 00:10:16,162
I asked you to do one thing.

194
00:10:23,544 --> 00:10:25,466
This'll make you forget about Patrick.

195
00:10:25,491 --> 00:10:28,309
This'll make you forget you
didn't get into law school.

196
00:10:28,424 --> 00:10:30,552
This'll make you forget
you live with your mom.

197
00:10:30,908 --> 00:10:32,567
Okay, if we're gonna
list all my problems,

198
00:10:32,592 --> 00:10:34,247
we're gonna run out of dresses.

199
00:10:35,801 --> 00:10:38,778
Uh, these are too expensive.

200
00:10:39,270 --> 00:10:41,356
I got to tell you, Jill,
I really appreciate this,

201
00:10:41,381 --> 00:10:44,132
but I'm just so much more
comfortable at an outlet mall.

202
00:10:44,505 --> 00:10:45,903
Outlet mall?

203
00:10:46,061 --> 00:10:48,825
Can't heal a sad
person with sad clothes.

204
00:10:50,038 --> 00:10:51,838
Nothing's gonna heal me.

205
00:10:52,856 --> 00:10:54,731
Why don't you try talking about it?

206
00:10:54,836 --> 00:10:57,450
You know, I took an
online class in listening.

207
00:10:57,729 --> 00:11:00,196
Forgetting myself... and go.

208
00:11:00,581 --> 00:11:02,948
Jill, I really don't
want to talk about this.

209
00:11:03,137 --> 00:11:04,918
Especially with you not blinking.

210
00:11:04,943 --> 00:11:06,109
It's freaking me out.

211
00:11:06,264 --> 00:11:08,270
Come on, give me one chance.

212
00:11:08,317 --> 00:11:10,651
Forgetting myself... and go.

213
00:11:10,676 --> 00:11:12,509
I really don't want to do this.

214
00:11:12,644 --> 00:11:14,286
Trust me, it'll make you feel better.

215
00:11:14,311 --> 00:11:15,644
Forgetting myself and go!

216
00:11:17,262 --> 00:11:18,684
Fine.

217
00:11:18,969 --> 00:11:21,770
I can't help thinking I
made a mistake with Patrick.

218
00:11:21,795 --> 00:11:23,378
Oh, hell no!

219
00:11:23,533 --> 00:11:25,841
- So you think I did the right thing?
- No, shh!

220
00:11:25,866 --> 00:11:27,866
My ex-husband's new
wife just walked in.

221
00:11:28,178 --> 00:11:29,504
I didn't get a good look.

222
00:11:29,529 --> 00:11:31,622
Tell me if she lost the baby weight.

223
00:11:34,567 --> 00:11:37,208
Wow, is she a professional dancer?

224
00:11:37,877 --> 00:11:40,555
No, she's a professional
husband stealer.

225
00:11:41,475 --> 00:11:44,225
Slash highly-regarded anesthesiologist.

226
00:11:46,688 --> 00:11:47,930
What are we doing?

227
00:11:47,955 --> 00:11:49,915
- I can't let her see me.
- Why?

228
00:11:49,940 --> 00:11:51,606
'Cause she'll think I'm stalking her.

229
00:11:51,862 --> 00:11:53,282
Why would she think that?

230
00:11:53,307 --> 00:11:55,860
'Cause I had a dark six
weeks where I totally was.

231
00:11:59,418 --> 00:12:01,524
Mmm. Isn't he cute?

232
00:12:01,675 --> 00:12:04,376
- Yeah.
- You can name him anything you want.

233
00:12:04,697 --> 00:12:07,211
Have you named one after
Steve Miller yet? Look at him.

234
00:12:07,481 --> 00:12:11,321
He's a joker, he's a smoker,
he's a midnight toker.

235
00:12:11,346 --> 00:12:12,782
He is adorable,

236
00:12:12,807 --> 00:12:15,618
but I'm pretty well
established as a cat person.

237
00:12:15,643 --> 00:12:16,618
Exactly.

238
00:12:16,714 --> 00:12:18,899
Eight cats and you're
the crazy cat lady.

239
00:12:18,924 --> 00:12:21,594
Eight cats and one dog,
you just love animals.

240
00:12:23,497 --> 00:12:25,446
Who rescued who, am I right?

241
00:12:26,352 --> 00:12:28,860
Did you ask Wendy? She seems lonely.

242
00:12:28,885 --> 00:12:30,017
Yeah, already tried her.

243
00:12:30,042 --> 00:12:31,375
She lives with four other nurses.

244
00:12:31,400 --> 00:12:33,099
It's like a sitcom over there.

245
00:12:35,070 --> 00:12:38,040
I wish Adam would just take the dog.

246
00:12:38,512 --> 00:12:40,012
Let me ask you something.

247
00:12:40,014 --> 00:12:41,844
Did you get this dog
to make him feel better

248
00:12:41,869 --> 00:12:44,774
- or make you feel better?
- Aren't those the same thing?

249
00:12:45,352 --> 00:12:47,552
Bonnie, you're gonna have to
learn to weather these storms

250
00:12:47,554 --> 00:12:49,415
if you want to be
together for the long haul.

251
00:12:49,440 --> 00:12:50,555
But he's the rock.

252
00:12:50,580 --> 00:12:54,188
- Well, why can't you be the rock?
- Because I'm the river.

253
00:12:55,605 --> 00:12:57,313
The roaring river.

254
00:12:57,338 --> 00:12:59,766
I cut through the rock
and make the Grand Canyon,

255
00:12:59,791 --> 00:13:03,024
and people come from
miles around to behold me.

256
00:13:03,851 --> 00:13:07,102
- Wow.
- I knew you wouldn't get it.

257
00:13:07,784 --> 00:13:09,985
Listen, in any relationship,

258
00:13:10,010 --> 00:13:12,243
emotional support has
to be a two-way street.

259
00:13:12,268 --> 00:13:16,797
I'm not sure I buy that, but
someone's tail is wagging.

260
00:13:18,555 --> 00:13:22,961
"Oh, teach me how to love, Marjorie."

261
00:13:24,675 --> 00:13:25,807
Nothing?

262
00:13:27,221 --> 00:13:30,360
You don't want to live with
her. She's the crazy cat lady.

263
00:13:33,946 --> 00:13:35,677
Look at her, shopping for scarves

264
00:13:35,702 --> 00:13:37,619
like she's queen of the world.

265
00:13:38,376 --> 00:13:40,891
Oh, here comes the hat show.

266
00:13:42,409 --> 00:13:46,149
Hey, maybe she's shopping
'cause she's miserable, like me.

267
00:13:46,174 --> 00:13:49,125
Oh, that'd be great. Go find out.

268
00:13:49,450 --> 00:13:52,084
What? I don't even know her.

269
00:13:52,086 --> 00:13:54,969
Look, you do this for me,
and I'll take you to that...

270
00:13:55,065 --> 00:13:56,848
Old Navy.

271
00:14:00,288 --> 00:14:01,750
Wait here.

272
00:14:08,375 --> 00:14:10,291
That's a lovely hat.

273
00:14:10,551 --> 00:14:12,313
You really think I can
pull off this color?

274
00:14:12,369 --> 00:14:14,703
Mm, pretty sure you
could pull off anything.

275
00:14:14,728 --> 00:14:16,011
Thank you.

276
00:14:26,218 --> 00:14:28,063
Ugh.

277
00:14:28,213 --> 00:14:30,380
Don't need another one of these.

278
00:14:38,332 --> 00:14:40,313
Hi. Me again.

279
00:14:43,021 --> 00:14:44,354
Ugh.

280
00:14:44,743 --> 00:14:48,071
So, uh, you shopping
for a special occasion?

281
00:14:48,096 --> 00:14:50,096
Anniversary dinner. Three years.

282
00:14:50,344 --> 00:14:51,501
Oh.

283
00:14:51,526 --> 00:14:55,061
Ah, I remember my third anniversary.

284
00:14:55,086 --> 00:14:57,636
That's when you realize what
you're really married to.

285
00:14:58,033 --> 00:14:59,204
Not for us.

286
00:14:59,229 --> 00:15:01,829
My friends get sick of hearing
this, but we are so happy.

287
00:15:01,854 --> 00:15:03,520
It's like we just started dating.

288
00:15:03,545 --> 00:15:05,696
Oh, that's sweet.

289
00:15:06,693 --> 00:15:09,985
But, uh, having a baby,
that's like R.I.P. sex life.

290
00:15:10,010 --> 00:15:12,260
Oh, no, we are fine in that department.

291
00:15:12,449 --> 00:15:14,157
Your husband sounds perfect.

292
00:15:14,182 --> 00:15:16,318
Oh, no, he is not perfect.

293
00:15:16,343 --> 00:15:18,310
Really? In what way?

294
00:15:18,550 --> 00:15:20,633
He sends me too many flowers.

295
00:15:20,916 --> 00:15:22,662
Of course he does.

296
00:15:23,234 --> 00:15:26,099
- Anyway, it was nice meeting you.
- You, too.

297
00:15:26,124 --> 00:15:27,707
Bye, Penelope.

298
00:15:27,732 --> 00:15:30,529
Uh, I didn't tell you
my daughter's name.

299
00:15:31,709 --> 00:15:33,552
Yes, you did.

300
00:15:33,849 --> 00:15:35,604
No, I didn't.

301
00:15:35,606 --> 00:15:37,341
You're tired.

302
00:15:38,084 --> 00:15:39,975
You're probably right.

303
00:15:39,977 --> 00:15:41,810
Bye. Bye.

304
00:15:50,384 --> 00:15:53,029
Do you think maybe I should drive?

305
00:15:53,887 --> 00:15:56,646
Oh, for God's sakes,
Christy, I can drive and cry.

306
00:15:56,671 --> 00:15:58,513
I do it all the time!

307
00:15:59,270 --> 00:16:02,304
Can we at least keep a foot
between us and that truck?

308
00:16:02,329 --> 00:16:05,326
It's got all those
symbols for explodey stuff.

309
00:16:07,801 --> 00:16:10,248
I'm sorry I ruined our shopping vacay.

310
00:16:10,702 --> 00:16:12,952
Let's talk about you and Patrick.

311
00:16:12,977 --> 00:16:14,843
No, I'm fine.

312
00:16:15,345 --> 00:16:18,096
I mean it, Christy. Get my mind off me.

313
00:16:18,098 --> 00:16:19,648
Jill, I'd rather...

314
00:16:19,650 --> 00:16:23,768
Talk about Patrick!
Forgetting myself and go!

315
00:16:23,770 --> 00:16:26,451
Okay. Uh...

316
00:16:26,726 --> 00:16:29,857
I guess I'm worried I'm
just afraid to be happy.

317
00:16:30,350 --> 00:16:32,967
I mean, is it so crazy
to pick up my life

318
00:16:32,992 --> 00:16:34,561
and see where it goes in Santa Cruz?

319
00:16:34,596 --> 00:16:38,576
They have law schools
there. They have meetings.

320
00:16:38,869 --> 00:16:42,454
When I met James, I
picked up my whole life

321
00:16:42,456 --> 00:16:44,928
and moved from Charleston to
California just to be with him.

322
00:16:45,317 --> 00:16:46,427
Really?

323
00:16:46,452 --> 00:16:48,943
You know what kind of
culture shock that is?

324
00:16:49,844 --> 00:16:52,818
I had to lose my accent
just to fit in with y'all.

325
00:16:55,962 --> 00:16:57,845
And it was worth it.

326
00:16:58,568 --> 00:17:01,690
And I'm not even willing to
move three hours from here

327
00:17:01,692 --> 00:17:03,420
to a lovely seaside community.

328
00:17:03,724 --> 00:17:05,850
Where my mother doesn't live.

329
00:17:06,375 --> 00:17:07,951
What is wrong with me?

330
00:17:08,521 --> 00:17:10,873
I loved James so much, I
would've moved to the moon

331
00:17:10,898 --> 00:17:12,431
if he asked me to.

332
00:17:13,896 --> 00:17:15,490
And I wouldn't.

333
00:17:17,291 --> 00:17:19,162
Maybe I don't love Patrick.

334
00:17:21,389 --> 00:17:23,995
Sweetie, I think if you
have to ask the question,

335
00:17:23,997 --> 00:17:25,170
then you don't.

336
00:17:25,951 --> 00:17:28,550
But I really feel like I should.

337
00:17:28,936 --> 00:17:32,420
Just because he's a thousand
times better than anybody else

338
00:17:32,422 --> 00:17:34,670
you've ever dated
doesn't mean he's the one.

339
00:17:35,335 --> 00:17:37,208
Huh.

340
00:17:38,178 --> 00:17:41,022
I know that running into your
ex's wife ripped your guts out,

341
00:17:41,047 --> 00:17:43,068
but, boy, did it help me.

342
00:17:44,160 --> 00:17:45,693
You're welcome.

343
00:17:49,498 --> 00:17:53,068
Oh! And here come your outlet stores.

344
00:17:53,847 --> 00:17:56,670
Mm, there's even a Der Wienerschnitzel.

345
00:17:57,007 --> 00:17:59,174
Yay! Der Wienerschnitzel!

346
00:18:02,586 --> 00:18:04,540
Now, this show has some nudity,

347
00:18:04,565 --> 00:18:06,256
but nothing you didn't already see

348
00:18:06,281 --> 00:18:08,529
when you barged in
on me taking a shower.

349
00:18:10,186 --> 00:18:12,873
Oh. You stay here, I'll get the door.

350
00:18:16,861 --> 00:18:18,311
Hey, don't change the channel.

351
00:18:21,972 --> 00:18:23,438
Oh.

352
00:18:23,787 --> 00:18:25,732
- Hey.
- Hey.

353
00:18:25,757 --> 00:18:27,040
What brings you by?

354
00:18:27,615 --> 00:18:29,894
Well, what always brings
me by after we fight:

355
00:18:29,896 --> 00:18:31,363
I'm caving.

356
00:18:32,334 --> 00:18:34,866
Well, let me put the puppy in his crate,

357
00:18:34,868 --> 00:18:36,350
so you don't have to look at him.

358
00:18:36,375 --> 00:18:38,092
Bonnie, it's okay.

359
00:18:39,704 --> 00:18:44,061
I know I haven't been easy
to be around, and I'm sorry.

360
00:18:44,490 --> 00:18:46,279
I'm sorry, too.

361
00:18:46,304 --> 00:18:49,472
I shouldn't have tried to tell
you how you're supposed to feel

362
00:18:49,497 --> 00:18:51,547
or when you should be done feeling it.

363
00:18:52,387 --> 00:18:54,848
If you need to be the raging
river, I can be the rock.

364
00:18:55,489 --> 00:18:57,406
Lucky for you, I only go full river

365
00:18:57,431 --> 00:18:59,298
about once every ten years.

366
00:18:59,866 --> 00:19:01,750
Last time was when Derek Jeter retired

367
00:19:01,775 --> 00:19:04,025
and they had that
commercial where he was

368
00:19:04,050 --> 00:19:06,332
walking through the streets of New York.

369
00:19:08,067 --> 00:19:09,801
The last hero.

370
00:19:11,850 --> 00:19:13,683
I think he likes you.

371
00:19:15,458 --> 00:19:16,958
Oh.

372
00:19:17,366 --> 00:19:18,699
What's his name?

373
00:19:18,724 --> 00:19:21,224
Well, up until this point,
his name has been "No,"

374
00:19:21,249 --> 00:19:23,574
sometimes "Damn it," and
occasionally "Not on the rug."

375
00:19:24,860 --> 00:19:26,610
Do you like any of those names?

376
00:19:26,870 --> 00:19:29,973
Hmm? I didn't think so.

377
00:19:29,998 --> 00:19:32,498
How about... Gus?

378
00:19:32,907 --> 00:19:35,074
Does this mean you're keeping him?

379
00:19:35,373 --> 00:19:37,874
I think it means I'm
stuck with both of you.

380
00:19:41,155 --> 00:19:43,020
How 'bout we call him Sebastian?

381
00:19:43,045 --> 00:19:44,684
I already named him Gus.

382
00:19:44,709 --> 00:19:46,375
Butterscotch? Gus.

383
00:19:46,377 --> 00:19:48,326
Bon Jovi?

384
00:19:49,201 --> 00:19:51,740
- Gus.
- We'll talk about it later.

385
00:19:52,287 --> 00:19:54,014
Oh!

386
00:19:54,039 --> 00:19:56,475
Who's the best boy?

387
00:19:56,637 --> 00:19:58,467
You're the best boy.

388
00:19:58,896 --> 00:20:02,100
Did you like your puppy chow?
Was it too dry?

389
00:20:02,125 --> 00:20:03,791
Was it too wet?

390
00:20:04,228 --> 00:20:06,420
Or was it just right?

391
00:20:09,117 --> 00:20:13,212
Oh, I could snuggle with you all
day, but it's time for walkies.

392
00:20:13,237 --> 00:20:14,570
Now, it's wet outside,

393
00:20:14,572 --> 00:20:17,318
so Mommy's gonna put on your raincoat.

394
00:20:17,959 --> 00:20:21,460
I know you don't like it,
but it's what's good for you.

395
00:20:21,462 --> 00:20:24,631
And that's my job, to take care of you.

396
00:20:25,235 --> 00:20:27,912
Oh!

397
00:20:28,233 --> 00:20:31,318
I just love you so much.

398
00:20:32,423 --> 00:20:34,673
So you had it in you all along!

399
00:20:38,318 --> 00:20:41,912
-- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe --
-- www.addic7ed.com --