1
00:00:04,709 --> 00:00:06,959
_

2
00:00:09,125 --> 00:00:11,250
Oh. Chase.

3
00:00:11,267 --> 00:00:12,767
Just want to thank you again

4
00:00:12,769 --> 00:00:14,223
for bringing me on
board your new company.

5
00:00:14,248 --> 00:00:16,637
Oh, Greg, I never forget my
hardest-working employees.

6
00:00:16,639 --> 00:00:18,422
And you were the only
one who wasn't taken down

7
00:00:18,447 --> 00:00:20,308
by a feminist blog.

8
00:00:20,310 --> 00:00:22,043
This Spotz app is genius.

9
00:00:22,045 --> 00:00:25,446
I mean, Airbnb for your driveway.

10
00:00:25,448 --> 00:00:27,615
How many times have I looked
at my driveway and thought,

11
00:00:27,617 --> 00:00:29,384
"How can I make money off of you?"

12
00:00:29,386 --> 00:00:30,785
Not once, you know,

13
00:00:30,787 --> 00:00:32,887
which is why I didn't think of this.

14
00:00:32,889 --> 00:00:34,422
Well, thinking of apps

15
00:00:34,424 --> 00:00:36,657
and standing to pee
is a young man's game.

16
00:00:36,659 --> 00:00:39,192
Okay. Well, I'll write that down.

17
00:00:39,250 --> 00:00:40,324
Greg, meet the team.

18
00:00:40,325 --> 00:00:42,449
This is Austin. You probably know her

19
00:00:42,451 --> 00:00:44,384
from her gamertag, PookieGunner.

20
00:00:44,386 --> 00:00:45,452
'Sup?

21
00:00:45,454 --> 00:00:48,021
Sandy, aka BedBathAndBeyoncé.

22
00:00:48,023 --> 00:00:49,022
Mister.

23
00:00:49,024 --> 00:00:50,123
And Edward,

24
00:00:50,125 --> 00:00:51,491
better known as

25
00:00:51,501 --> 00:00:53,668
- Booger-X.
- Oh!

26
00:00:53,680 --> 00:00:56,180
Booger, like Revenge of the Nerds.

27
00:00:56,205 --> 00:00:57,828
I don't know that podcast.

28
00:00:57,853 --> 00:01:01,160
No, it's a movie. I-I'll bring
in a DVD for you sometime.

29
00:01:02,337 --> 00:01:05,468
So you can rip it onto a link.

30
00:01:05,968 --> 00:01:07,274
SoundCloud.

31
00:01:09,478 --> 00:01:10,687
Okay, guys, tell you what.

32
00:01:10,712 --> 00:01:12,946
Why don't you put him on the group text

33
00:01:12,948 --> 00:01:14,548
and bring him up to speed.

34
00:01:14,550 --> 00:01:15,849
Now, if you'll excuse me,

35
00:01:15,851 --> 00:01:18,552
I have to go sit down and take a pee.

36
00:01:21,430 --> 00:01:23,523
What's up, Mario Van Peoples?

37
00:01:23,525 --> 00:01:25,292
Feeling some donuts?

38
00:01:25,294 --> 00:01:28,495
Compliments of DJGreg420WhuWhu.

39
00:01:34,097 --> 00:01:35,830
We're off gluten.

40
00:01:35,961 --> 00:01:38,238
Maybe I can return these.

41
00:01:40,623 --> 00:01:43,577
Oh, Jen, it's the
worst. Everyone hates me.

42
00:01:43,579 --> 00:01:45,645
I can't fit in. I just...

43
00:01:45,647 --> 00:01:49,015
I'm sorry. I just needed
to hear a friendly voice.

44
00:01:49,017 --> 00:01:50,684
Your mom didn't pick up, huh?

45
00:01:50,686 --> 00:01:52,018
No, she didn't.

46
00:01:52,020 --> 00:01:53,768
You know, I mean,

47
00:01:53,793 --> 00:01:56,189
they all have these inside jokes.

48
00:01:56,191 --> 00:01:58,158
I mean, I'm-I'm looking
at the bathroom wall.

49
00:01:58,160 --> 00:01:59,292
It's covered in graffiti

50
00:01:59,294 --> 00:02:00,861
where they make fun of each other.

51
00:02:00,863 --> 00:02:03,096
You know, "Jay is gross."

52
00:02:03,098 --> 00:02:04,898
"Pat smells his wipes."

53
00:02:04,900 --> 00:02:07,500
"Jacob doesn't recycle." I mean...

54
00:02:07,502 --> 00:02:09,970
Nothing about old Greg.

55
00:02:09,972 --> 00:02:11,805
You're not eating in
the bathroom, are you?

56
00:02:11,807 --> 00:02:13,640
What? No way.

57
00:02:14,133 --> 00:02:15,909
You know, I'm really thinking

58
00:02:15,911 --> 00:02:18,144
it was a mistake taking this job.

59
00:02:18,146 --> 00:02:19,379
Oh, honey, don't worry about it.

60
00:02:19,381 --> 00:02:21,181
You'll figure out how
to speak their language.

61
00:02:21,183 --> 00:02:23,016
Yeah, but how do I do that?

62
00:02:23,018 --> 00:02:25,485
Well, you're eating in the bathroom

63
00:02:25,487 --> 00:02:29,422
while talking to your wife,
so maybe start with not that.

64
00:02:47,423 --> 00:02:50,744
I saw what you jokesters
wrote in the bathroom about me.

65
00:02:50,746 --> 00:02:52,412
Classic.

66
00:02:52,414 --> 00:02:55,882
Hey! Listen up, everybody.

67
00:02:55,884 --> 00:02:58,451
Emergency meeting, my office, right now.

68
00:02:58,453 --> 00:03:00,954
Angry face emoji.

69
00:03:04,493 --> 00:03:06,860
There's some serious stuff
happening in the bathroom.

70
00:03:06,862 --> 00:03:09,562
More serious than when
Larry hung himself in there?

71
00:03:09,564 --> 00:03:11,064
That was bad.

72
00:03:11,066 --> 00:03:13,099
Or when Andrea had her baby in there?

73
00:03:13,101 --> 00:03:14,234
Ooh, that was bad, too,

74
00:03:14,236 --> 00:03:15,835
but this is worse.

75
00:03:15,837 --> 00:03:18,872
Whoever wrote that about
Greg crossed the line.

76
00:03:18,874 --> 00:03:21,441
Oh, oh, i-it's fine.

77
00:03:21,443 --> 00:03:23,076
I mean, really, it's...

78
00:03:23,078 --> 00:03:25,745
Got to have a-a thick
skin if you're gonna

79
00:03:25,747 --> 00:03:28,093
be in the Spotz gang.

80
00:03:28,118 --> 00:03:31,392
Isn't that right, PookieHunterGamer?

81
00:03:31,556 --> 00:03:33,301
PookieGunner.

82
00:03:33,326 --> 00:03:34,625
I was close.

83
00:03:34,650 --> 00:03:37,424
Death threats, hate
speech, body shaming,

84
00:03:37,426 --> 00:03:39,492
all in one horrible scribble?

85
00:03:39,494 --> 00:03:41,127
It's not okay.

86
00:03:41,129 --> 00:03:42,662
Talking about...

87
00:03:42,664 --> 00:03:45,632
that area? Not okay.

88
00:03:45,634 --> 00:03:47,139
Pointing out this?

89
00:03:47,459 --> 00:03:48,868
Not okay.

90
00:03:48,870 --> 00:03:51,171
Why don't we talk about what's up here

91
00:03:51,173 --> 00:03:53,206
or what's in here.

92
00:03:53,705 --> 00:03:55,182
Okay, if you're a woman,

93
00:03:55,207 --> 00:03:57,677
I guess let's just
stick to what's up here.

94
00:03:58,347 --> 00:04:00,180
That's a beautiful blouse, by the way.

95
00:04:00,861 --> 00:04:03,328
So, who was it?

96
00:04:03,923 --> 00:04:05,018
Okay.

97
00:04:05,020 --> 00:04:06,920
If you're not man enough to...

98
00:04:06,922 --> 00:04:09,089
Can't say that.

99
00:04:09,091 --> 00:04:12,826
If you don't have the balls
to tell me that it was you,

100
00:04:13,056 --> 00:04:15,875
then we're just gonna
get a handwriting analysis

101
00:04:15,900 --> 00:04:17,866
and find out the culprit that way.

102
00:04:17,920 --> 00:04:19,132
When I find out who did

103
00:04:19,134 --> 00:04:20,467
the crime in the bathroom,

104
00:04:20,469 --> 00:04:22,702
they will be terminated and prosecuted.

105
00:04:24,006 --> 00:04:26,006
Greg, what are you doing?

106
00:04:26,008 --> 00:04:28,441
I don't know. I was
just trying to fit in.

107
00:04:28,443 --> 00:04:30,076
That's, like, the definition

108
00:04:30,078 --> 00:04:31,978
of creating a hostile work environment.

109
00:04:31,980 --> 00:04:33,646
Why would you write that?

110
00:04:33,648 --> 00:04:36,316
Matt used to say it to me all
the time when we were kids.

111
00:04:36,879 --> 00:04:38,225
I knew I should've gone with

112
00:04:38,250 --> 00:04:40,791
his other insult, "Greg is adopted."

113
00:04:40,792 --> 00:04:42,830
You know, but we have
this Russian kid there,

114
00:04:42,831 --> 00:04:45,492
and he has two dads, so it
felt kind of risky, you know?

115
00:04:45,494 --> 00:04:46,659
Mm-hmm. Yeah.

116
00:04:46,661 --> 00:04:48,862
When I said to learn
to speak their language,

117
00:04:48,864 --> 00:04:50,864
I meant, like, buy a hat.

118
00:04:50,866 --> 00:04:53,035
I did buy a hat. You threw it away.

119
00:04:53,060 --> 00:04:55,561
Well, it was a stupid hat.

120
00:04:57,829 --> 00:04:59,739
Chase, uh...

121
00:04:59,741 --> 00:05:01,941
I'm sorry, but we need to talk

122
00:05:01,943 --> 00:05:04,677
about what was written in the bathroom.

123
00:05:04,991 --> 00:05:07,826
I know, buddy. Have a seat.

124
00:05:09,108 --> 00:05:12,285
I just got off the phone with
my entire board of directors.

125
00:05:12,287 --> 00:05:14,220
I'm out. They suspended me.

126
00:05:14,222 --> 00:05:17,971
W-Why? I mean, you didn't write
that stuff in the bathroom.

127
00:05:17,996 --> 00:05:19,459
I assume.

128
00:05:19,461 --> 00:05:22,479
No way to tell. I wasn't allowed
to analyze the handwriting.

129
00:05:22,504 --> 00:05:23,830
The board feels that I've created

130
00:05:23,832 --> 00:05:27,558
a toxic work environment,
and I have to agree.

131
00:05:27,848 --> 00:05:29,369
You know how many times
I've gone home crying

132
00:05:29,371 --> 00:05:31,649
after someone wrote
something horrible about me?

133
00:05:31,674 --> 00:05:34,586
Yeah, yeah, I read that
thing about your man boobs.

134
00:05:34,611 --> 00:05:36,209
But if it makes you feel any better,

135
00:05:36,211 --> 00:05:38,244
I did not notice until I read it.

136
00:05:38,596 --> 00:05:40,062
You're a good guy, Greg.

137
00:05:40,087 --> 00:05:42,215
That's why the board
wants you to take over.

138
00:05:42,876 --> 00:05:45,885
What? Me?

139
00:05:48,186 --> 00:05:50,457
Hey, boss man. How's work?

140
00:05:50,459 --> 00:05:52,459
Those teenagers still being mean to you?

141
00:05:52,461 --> 00:05:53,960
Well, you tell me.

142
00:05:53,962 --> 00:05:56,062
Listen to what my team wrote about me

143
00:05:56,064 --> 00:05:57,597
on the bathroom wall.

144
00:05:57,599 --> 00:05:59,699
"Must be nice to be an old loser

145
00:05:59,701 --> 00:06:02,669
who gets promoted after two days."

146
00:06:02,671 --> 00:06:04,270
I'm finally fitting in.

147
00:06:04,272 --> 00:06:05,605
Oh, wow.

148
00:06:05,607 --> 00:06:08,074
Life has a funny way of working out.

149
00:06:08,076 --> 00:06:11,377
Hey, uh, any luck getting
rid of what you wrote?

150
00:06:11,379 --> 00:06:14,908
No, they told me they're
gonna have to retile.

151
00:06:15,117 --> 00:06:17,776
Guess I shouldn't
have written it so big.

152
00:06:23,542 --> 00:06:25,376
_

153
00:06:27,162 --> 00:06:30,140
Aw!

154
00:06:30,165 --> 00:06:33,945
Jen, you wretched thing,
how am I supposed to handle

155
00:06:33,970 --> 00:06:36,379
that adorable dress?

156
00:06:36,404 --> 00:06:40,255
I mean, just kill me.
Just end it all now.

157
00:06:40,317 --> 00:06:41,808
Lark, what do you say?

158
00:06:41,810 --> 00:06:43,730
Thank you, Easter Bunny.

159
00:06:43,751 --> 00:06:45,210
- Aw.
- Thank you... Oh.

160
00:06:45,211 --> 00:06:47,292
She thinks I'm the Easter Bunny.

161
00:06:47,681 --> 00:06:50,516
We are doing such a good job.

162
00:06:51,760 --> 00:06:54,397
Isn't this just a little sanctimonious?

163
00:06:55,283 --> 00:06:58,291
Uh... maybe.

164
00:07:00,729 --> 00:07:03,663
I got to trade my kids
in for a new model.

165
00:07:03,665 --> 00:07:07,076
Someone got resurrected today,
and we're just sitting here

166
00:07:07,101 --> 00:07:10,607
obsessing over the third most
boring person in our family.

167
00:07:10,632 --> 00:07:11,704
Who are the first two...

168
00:07:11,706 --> 00:07:13,531
No offense, you guys.

169
00:07:17,114 --> 00:07:18,344
Hungwy.

170
00:07:18,346 --> 00:07:19,722
Are you speaking Korean?

171
00:07:19,747 --> 00:07:21,548
I thought you and
Sung-sook had a falling out.

172
00:07:21,550 --> 00:07:23,349
We want p'sghetti.

173
00:07:23,351 --> 00:07:24,918
Okay, honey, I don't
know what you're doing,

174
00:07:24,920 --> 00:07:26,700
but I assume that
you're making fun of me

175
00:07:26,709 --> 00:07:29,293
in some sort of complicated
way that I don't understand.

176
00:07:29,294 --> 00:07:31,124
So no TV for you tonight, okay?

177
00:07:31,126 --> 00:07:32,392
Uh...

178
00:07:32,975 --> 00:07:35,028
You have no idea how
much I enjoyed that.

179
00:07:35,030 --> 00:07:37,564
It's your second helping,
so I'm guessing a lot.

180
00:07:37,566 --> 00:07:40,668
I meant your desperation.
I think you need to start

181
00:07:40,708 --> 00:07:42,730
wetting your pants
again to really sell it.

182
00:07:42,755 --> 00:07:44,722
I don't know what you're talking about.

183
00:07:44,747 --> 00:07:48,988
You forget, I was the
cute one before you.

184
00:07:49,013 --> 00:07:51,411
Then some thing clawed
its way out of Mom,

185
00:07:51,413 --> 00:07:53,479
turned the family into a Sophia cult.

186
00:07:53,481 --> 00:07:55,582
Well, that'll never
happen with Lark and me.

187
00:07:55,584 --> 00:07:57,150
She's so stale.

188
00:07:57,152 --> 00:08:00,019
She's like if two blah
white people had a baby.

189
00:08:00,021 --> 00:08:01,921
Hey, babe, you know what I love?

190
00:08:01,922 --> 00:08:04,335
- Quinoa?
- Yeah.

191
00:08:04,944 --> 00:08:06,878
Don't worry, Clementine and Tyler

192
00:08:06,903 --> 00:08:09,261
won't go five years
without getting pregnant.

193
00:08:09,286 --> 00:08:11,653
And Lark'll be out on her ass, too.

194
00:08:13,702 --> 00:08:15,612
Oh, I can't!

195
00:08:15,637 --> 00:08:18,766
I can't live on a planet this adorable!

196
00:08:18,829 --> 00:08:22,890
Just weigh me down and
throw me in the river!

197
00:08:23,524 --> 00:08:25,478
Mine's twirlier.

198
00:08:27,292 --> 00:08:29,793
Okay. Sophie, stop it. You look
like you're tripping on acid.

199
00:08:29,836 --> 00:08:31,985
You want to know what?
What if we just, um...

200
00:08:31,987 --> 00:08:33,340
Oh. Here you go.

201
00:08:33,375 --> 00:08:35,956
- Oh...
- Oh. Good?

202
00:08:35,957 --> 00:08:37,423
My!

203
00:08:37,425 --> 00:08:40,159
Just decapitate me!

204
00:08:40,435 --> 00:08:41,957
These are empty threats, right?

205
00:08:42,000 --> 00:08:43,417
Hey, uh, Sophia,

206
00:08:43,418 --> 00:08:46,299
can-can you move a little bit, please?

207
00:08:46,301 --> 00:08:48,568
No, no, no. Other way.
You're in the frame.

208
00:08:49,229 --> 00:08:51,345
There you go. Yeah, keep going.

209
00:08:51,370 --> 00:08:53,306
A little more. Bucket's still in.

210
00:08:53,308 --> 00:08:55,034
Bucket's still in. There we go.

211
00:08:55,059 --> 00:08:57,610
All right, Lark. Smile. Perfect.

212
00:08:58,073 --> 00:08:59,791
I want a copy of that.

213
00:08:59,816 --> 00:09:01,414
I'm gonna tape it on my computer

214
00:09:01,416 --> 00:09:03,182
as my new screen saver.

215
00:09:03,184 --> 00:09:05,118
Happy Easter, everyone.

216
00:09:05,120 --> 00:09:10,984
It's time for our under-fives
to get ready for the egg hunt!

217
00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:12,000
You hear that, Lark?

218
00:09:12,027 --> 00:09:13,926
You gonna win the egg
hunt, like we said?

219
00:09:13,928 --> 00:09:16,129
I will win that the most!

220
00:09:16,292 --> 00:09:17,918
Really cute.

221
00:09:18,125 --> 00:09:20,751
- Right, Sophia?
- Shut it, Samantha.

222
00:09:20,876 --> 00:09:24,835
Ready, set, and go!

223
00:09:25,233 --> 00:09:26,800
Lark. Larkie.

224
00:09:26,825 --> 00:09:28,241
Go get that big blue egg.

225
00:09:28,243 --> 00:09:29,333
Yeah!

226
00:09:29,334 --> 00:09:30,668
- Oh, look at her.
- Oh, look at her.

227
00:09:30,679 --> 00:09:31,744
To the right, Lark, to the right.

228
00:09:31,751 --> 00:09:34,114
- Oh, no. Not the rock.
- Aw.

229
00:09:34,115 --> 00:09:36,049
Well, you know, she probably felt bad

230
00:09:36,051 --> 00:09:38,384
that the rock wasn't
getting any attention.

231
00:09:38,386 --> 00:09:40,520
She doesn't even know her colors.

232
00:09:40,522 --> 00:09:42,655
Or left from right.

233
00:09:43,224 --> 00:09:44,891
Sophia, what are you doing?

234
00:09:45,607 --> 00:09:46,826
You snooze, you lose.

235
00:09:46,828 --> 00:09:49,095
Sophia. Those aren't for you!

236
00:09:49,097 --> 00:09:51,002
What on earth? What the...?

237
00:09:51,166 --> 00:09:52,165
No!

238
00:09:52,167 --> 00:09:54,133
Wh-What's that young lady doing?

239
00:09:55,983 --> 00:09:58,183
Where are her parents?

240
00:09:59,074 --> 00:10:01,174
Honey. Please.

241
00:10:01,176 --> 00:10:02,575
Don't do that.

242
00:10:02,577 --> 00:10:03,801
Okay, what do we do?

243
00:10:03,802 --> 00:10:06,084
- I think we just do the right thing.
- Yeah.

244
00:10:06,114 --> 00:10:07,647
Whose monster child is this?

245
00:10:07,649 --> 00:10:11,150
Yeah! Get that girl off the field, huh?

246
00:10:17,083 --> 00:10:18,250
Careful.

247
00:10:18,381 --> 00:10:20,114
Those'll mess you up.

248
00:10:20,333 --> 00:10:22,562
My tolerance is off the
charts at this point.

249
00:10:22,564 --> 00:10:24,466
I don't even feel it.

250
00:10:24,692 --> 00:10:26,738
You sure showed
those three-year-olds.

251
00:10:26,763 --> 00:10:28,868
Their parents are calling you Godzilla.

252
00:10:28,870 --> 00:10:32,072
I'm not proud I destroyed Tokyo, okay?

253
00:10:32,097 --> 00:10:33,673
So if you're here to make fun of me,

254
00:10:33,675 --> 00:10:36,576
why don't you just go
somewhere and have puberty.

255
00:10:36,875 --> 00:10:38,641
I'm not gonna make fun of you.

256
00:10:39,159 --> 00:10:41,231
Mom and Dad wanted me to give you this.

257
00:10:42,918 --> 00:10:44,960
Ten bucks? Why?

258
00:10:45,221 --> 00:10:47,251
They said it's only half of what's yours

259
00:10:47,276 --> 00:10:49,756
if you don't call them Mom
and Dad till we leave the park.

260
00:10:50,174 --> 00:10:52,091
Fine by me.

261
00:10:52,439 --> 00:10:54,439
Hey, life isn't over

262
00:10:54,464 --> 00:10:56,562
because you aren't the cute one anymore.

263
00:10:56,751 --> 00:10:59,285
This just means it's
time to reinvent yourself.

264
00:10:59,717 --> 00:11:01,350
Find a new thing.

265
00:11:03,304 --> 00:11:06,105
Uh, but don't sulk. That's my thing.

266
00:11:07,313 --> 00:11:10,083
Give me one of those.

267
00:11:12,075 --> 00:11:13,975
Okay, ready?

268
00:11:21,918 --> 00:11:23,836
- What are you doing?
- Gotcha!

269
00:11:23,837 --> 00:11:25,941
I'm a practical jokester now.

270
00:11:25,966 --> 00:11:27,460
You been Soph'd!

271
00:11:27,462 --> 00:11:29,896
Okay, well, just clean all this
up when you're done, all right?

272
00:11:29,898 --> 00:11:31,566
Ketchup stains.

273
00:11:31,591 --> 00:11:33,966
Maybe keep trying.

274
00:11:36,542 --> 00:11:38,460
_

275
00:11:40,042 --> 00:11:41,700
Hey, John.

276
00:11:41,701 --> 00:11:44,302
Hey! I didn't recognize
you without my son.

277
00:11:44,304 --> 00:11:45,676
Do you want some breakfast?

278
00:11:45,709 --> 00:11:48,501
Uh... well, it's 5:00 o'clock.

279
00:11:49,008 --> 00:11:52,243
Oh? Well, I'm going back to bed.

280
00:11:52,245 --> 00:11:53,462
Who's in here?

281
00:11:53,487 --> 00:11:55,990
Who is in here? Say hi to Mommy!

282
00:11:56,000 --> 00:11:57,667
Wow.

283
00:11:57,709 --> 00:11:59,834
Looks like you two had some fun.

284
00:11:59,853 --> 00:12:02,186
I made Cheeto my baby.

285
00:12:02,188 --> 00:12:04,055
Is he in diapers?

286
00:12:04,289 --> 00:12:06,622
That's crazy. He's 49.

287
00:12:06,647 --> 00:12:07,825
You know what, sweetie?

288
00:12:07,827 --> 00:12:09,327
I love his beautiful necklace,

289
00:12:09,329 --> 00:12:11,362
but it looks very fancy, so I think

290
00:12:11,364 --> 00:12:13,965
we should just take it off
and give it back to Mom-Mom.

291
00:12:13,967 --> 00:12:17,101
Jen, if you like the necklace,
why don't you keep it?

292
00:12:17,103 --> 00:12:19,670
Oh, no. No, no. I couldn't
take your necklace.

293
00:12:19,672 --> 00:12:22,590
Sure you can. I never wear it.

294
00:12:22,615 --> 00:12:25,251
And I'd love for you to
have something of mine.

295
00:12:25,276 --> 00:12:27,176
It'd make me so happy

296
00:12:27,201 --> 00:12:30,262
to see you enjoy it while
I still have half a brain.

297
00:12:31,651 --> 00:12:34,585
Joanie, what is that, face crabs?

298
00:12:36,245 --> 00:12:37,231
Hurry, hurry

299
00:12:37,250 --> 00:12:39,292
while there's still
some of my quiche left.

300
00:12:39,324 --> 00:12:42,436
I made it with marshmallow,
so it's both savory and sweet.

301
00:12:42,438 --> 00:12:44,872
Mmm. Mmm. Yum. Best of both worlds.

302
00:12:44,874 --> 00:12:48,108
You know what? I'm just so
full. Couldn't eat another bite.

303
00:12:50,803 --> 00:12:52,780
Oh, you're wearing the necklace?

304
00:12:52,805 --> 00:12:54,648
It looks beautiful on you.

305
00:12:54,650 --> 00:12:56,450
Oh, thank you. I love it.

306
00:12:56,452 --> 00:12:58,619
I haven't taken it off.

307
00:12:58,621 --> 00:13:00,287
Here, let me help you.

308
00:13:00,289 --> 00:13:01,689
Oh, thank you.

309
00:13:01,691 --> 00:13:04,325
I'll owe you big

310
00:13:04,327 --> 00:13:07,762
if you can throw out Colleen's
quiche without her seeing it.

311
00:13:07,764 --> 00:13:10,431
Yeah, yeah, I think I'll
throw it in the trash, though,

312
00:13:10,433 --> 00:13:12,466
'cause the last one broke
the garbage disposal.

313
00:13:12,467 --> 00:13:15,542
- Oh, my gosh, that's right.
- Ooh, yeah.

314
00:13:16,793 --> 00:13:18,089
Oh, hey,

315
00:13:18,090 --> 00:13:20,142
how does your mom feel
about getting naked?

316
00:13:20,167 --> 00:13:21,626
- Hmm?
- I was thinking about taking her

317
00:13:21,627 --> 00:13:22,544
to the Korean spa.

318
00:13:22,578 --> 00:13:24,606
Oh, she loves being
naked, like, too much.

319
00:13:24,631 --> 00:13:28,682
Like, my entire childhood felt
like one big Cinemax movie.

320
00:13:29,322 --> 00:13:30,633
Wow.

321
00:13:30,658 --> 00:13:31,886
Where'd you get that necklace?

322
00:13:31,888 --> 00:13:33,454
Oh, your mom gave it to me.

323
00:13:33,459 --> 00:13:35,126
- Isn't it gorgeous?
- Oh. Yeah.

324
00:13:35,127 --> 00:13:37,291
- Thanks.
- That's nice. I'm glad she decided

325
00:13:37,292 --> 00:13:38,709
to keep it in the family.

326
00:13:38,710 --> 00:13:41,429
Will you excuse me for one second?

327
00:13:41,800 --> 00:13:44,899
I just can't get enough
of this quiche, Colleen!

328
00:13:44,924 --> 00:13:46,924
I knew you'd like it!

329
00:13:47,570 --> 00:13:50,455
Mom, how could you give Jen my necklace?

330
00:13:50,480 --> 00:13:52,773
You and Dad gave it to me when I was 16.

331
00:13:52,775 --> 00:13:55,209
Oh, no. We did, didn't we?

332
00:13:55,211 --> 00:13:57,111
For not getting pregnant.

333
00:13:57,113 --> 00:13:59,447
No, you gave me the Celica
for not getting pregnant.

334
00:13:59,449 --> 00:14:01,348
The necklace you gave
me for my birthday.

335
00:14:01,350 --> 00:14:02,850
I thought that I lost it.

336
00:14:02,852 --> 00:14:04,196
You're gonna have to go get that back.

337
00:14:04,221 --> 00:14:05,750
Oh, this is terrible.

338
00:14:05,775 --> 00:14:08,142
Don't beat yourself up, Mom.
It's okay. I forgive you.

339
00:14:08,618 --> 00:14:10,758
No, it's just Jen loves the necklace

340
00:14:10,760 --> 00:14:12,226
and it's brought us closer,

341
00:14:12,228 --> 00:14:15,129
and I don't know how
I can ask for it back.

342
00:14:15,434 --> 00:14:18,879
Well, I think the same way that
you asked for my Celica back

343
00:14:18,904 --> 00:14:20,534
when I did get pregnant.

344
00:14:25,250 --> 00:14:26,625
Hello, Jen!

345
00:14:26,707 --> 00:14:29,834
- Hi.
- Hi, hi, hi, hi, hi!

346
00:14:29,846 --> 00:14:33,113
I-I just wanted to return
your pie plate from brunch.

347
00:14:33,115 --> 00:14:34,949
Oh, you didn't have to do that,

348
00:14:34,951 --> 00:14:37,103
especially because it's not mine.

349
00:14:37,128 --> 00:14:39,361
Oh. Well, I-I have
to go to the bathroom.

350
00:14:39,386 --> 00:14:41,063
Would you excuse me?

351
00:14:45,161 --> 00:14:49,730
Where are you? Where are you?
Where are you? Where are you?

352
00:14:50,209 --> 00:14:51,710
Uh, Joan?

353
00:14:53,713 --> 00:14:54,778
I lied.

354
00:14:54,803 --> 00:14:56,070
I didn't have to go to the bathroom.

355
00:14:56,072 --> 00:14:58,005
I always go before I leave the house.

356
00:14:58,007 --> 00:15:01,004
Yeah. It troubles me that
I know that about you.

357
00:15:01,005 --> 00:15:03,417
I was looking for the
necklace I gave you.

358
00:15:03,418 --> 00:15:04,612
It's Heather's.

359
00:15:04,614 --> 00:15:06,413
Oh.

360
00:15:06,415 --> 00:15:09,783
Oh, that's why she was staring
at my chest all morning.

361
00:15:09,785 --> 00:15:13,187
I had completely
forgotten. I'm so sorry.

362
00:15:13,212 --> 00:15:17,658
I was gonna replace it with
this replica that John made.

363
00:15:17,660 --> 00:15:21,276
Yeah, that-that looks like a
marble on some fishing line.

364
00:15:21,301 --> 00:15:25,119
Yeah, I knew you'd know, but
he had me convinced, and...

365
00:15:25,144 --> 00:15:27,415
It's-it's okay. Really.

366
00:15:27,440 --> 00:15:29,069
It still means a lot

367
00:15:29,071 --> 00:15:30,655
that you wanted to give it to me.

368
00:15:30,680 --> 00:15:32,306
It made me feel like a daughter.

369
00:15:32,308 --> 00:15:35,910
Which makes sense, because
it is your daughter's.

370
00:15:35,912 --> 00:15:38,112
You know, my son is so lucky.

371
00:15:38,459 --> 00:15:40,918
I don't know what he's
always complaining about.

372
00:15:41,167 --> 00:15:44,751
So you're saying he-he
complains about me?

373
00:15:49,098 --> 00:15:50,373
Here it is, dear.

374
00:15:50,398 --> 00:15:52,593
Oh, Mom, you didn't have to do that.

375
00:15:52,595 --> 00:15:54,376
You told me I did.

376
00:15:54,401 --> 00:15:57,150
And then Tim called and said I'd better.

377
00:15:57,175 --> 00:15:59,366
And then the kids
called and threatened me.

378
00:15:59,368 --> 00:16:01,235
Oh. Did they?

379
00:16:01,250 --> 00:16:02,834
- Yeah.
- Aw.

380
00:16:02,876 --> 00:16:04,627
I hope Jen wasn't too upset.

381
00:16:04,673 --> 00:16:08,252
No, she was very mature and
understanding, elegant even.

382
00:16:08,277 --> 00:16:10,077
Which is why I gave her
those little earrings,

383
00:16:10,079 --> 00:16:11,912
you know, the lotus flowers.

384
00:16:11,914 --> 00:16:15,408
The-the ones that you got me
for my high school graduation.

385
00:16:15,433 --> 00:16:16,584
Oh, no.

386
00:16:17,542 --> 00:16:19,418
_

387
00:16:20,209 --> 00:16:23,001
I just think it's really weird
to stab somebody that you love.

388
00:16:23,042 --> 00:16:25,125
Is this really the
only way we can do IVF?

389
00:16:25,126 --> 00:16:27,293
Yes, babe. And you
have to get used to it,

390
00:16:27,295 --> 00:16:29,295
because we have to do it every day.

391
00:16:29,297 --> 00:16:30,496
Hormones are not the kind of thing

392
00:16:30,498 --> 00:16:32,165
you can wrap in peanut
butter and swallow.

393
00:16:32,167 --> 00:16:33,038
I asked.

394
00:16:33,063 --> 00:16:35,912
Okay, this is just really
hard for me, you know?

395
00:16:35,918 --> 00:16:38,168
- Yeah.
- Because I'm really scared of needles.

396
00:16:38,206 --> 00:16:39,837
Just do it.

397
00:16:39,838 --> 00:16:41,585
- Okay.
- No, wait, I'm not ready.

398
00:16:41,626 --> 00:16:43,625
Just do it.

399
00:16:43,626 --> 00:16:44,668
I'm not ready.

400
00:16:44,669 --> 00:16:47,377
Oh, s...

401
00:16:48,250 --> 00:16:49,549
Hi!

402
00:16:49,551 --> 00:16:51,835
Hey! Who's ready to do some shots?

403
00:16:53,021 --> 00:16:55,488
I really appreciate you
helping us with our IVF.

404
00:16:55,490 --> 00:16:58,602
I've asked literally everyone
else, and no one would do it.

405
00:16:58,633 --> 00:17:01,127
That's how I get 90% of my patients.

406
00:17:01,129 --> 00:17:03,630
Oh, I'm just so nervous,
and Matt is a mess.

407
00:17:03,632 --> 00:17:05,598
And then my needle kit
fell out on the bus,

408
00:17:05,600 --> 00:17:07,467
and I got all these unsettling winks.

409
00:17:07,492 --> 00:17:09,969
Oh, I hear you. I used
to get shots all the time.

410
00:17:09,971 --> 00:17:11,521
And before you jump to the obvious...

411
00:17:11,546 --> 00:17:12,326
Diabetes.

412
00:17:12,351 --> 00:17:14,207
Steroids... in med school,

413
00:17:14,209 --> 00:17:16,643
I used to let my classmates
practice giving shots on me.

414
00:17:16,645 --> 00:17:17,644
Ten bucks a pop.

415
00:17:17,669 --> 00:17:19,970
Oh. People used to
pay me in college, too.

416
00:17:20,164 --> 00:17:21,963
For... stuff.

417
00:17:22,083 --> 00:17:23,516
Please don't make this weird, Colleen.

418
00:17:23,518 --> 00:17:25,084
Just turn around, drop your pants,

419
00:17:25,086 --> 00:17:26,219
and let's make a baby.

420
00:17:26,221 --> 00:17:28,221
Okay. Here we go.

421
00:17:28,223 --> 00:17:30,253
Just give me a little heads-up, okay?

422
00:17:30,254 --> 00:17:32,292
- Sure.
- Because, uh, I'm really nervous,

423
00:17:32,293 --> 00:17:34,374
and my-my reflexes are crazy.

424
00:17:34,375 --> 00:17:36,126
- Done!
- So when you get... What?

425
00:17:36,848 --> 00:17:37,947
Tim!

426
00:17:37,959 --> 00:17:40,124
You really are a great doctor!

427
00:17:40,125 --> 00:17:41,167
Eh, it was nothing.

428
00:17:41,209 --> 00:17:42,835
That was incredible.
I didn't feel a thing.

429
00:17:42,837 --> 00:17:44,820
I just always assumed you were terrible.

430
00:17:44,845 --> 00:17:46,140
Funny, that's exactly what Heather said

431
00:17:46,165 --> 00:17:47,331
when I got her pregnant.

432
00:17:47,356 --> 00:17:48,522
Hmm.

433
00:17:51,834 --> 00:17:53,084
Psst!

434
00:17:53,125 --> 00:17:54,581
Oh! Hey!

435
00:17:54,584 --> 00:17:56,001
- Hey!
- You're, uh...

436
00:17:56,017 --> 00:17:56,700
you're early!

437
00:17:56,751 --> 00:17:59,001
Yeah, I'm really excited
for your medical magic.

438
00:17:59,035 --> 00:18:00,294
It's like you're one of those chickens

439
00:18:00,319 --> 00:18:01,520
that can play tic-tac-toe.

440
00:18:01,545 --> 00:18:03,022
Like, you don't believe it's possible,

441
00:18:03,024 --> 00:18:04,317
and all of a sudden, there you are;

442
00:18:04,342 --> 00:18:05,892
he's beating you three straight.

443
00:18:05,894 --> 00:18:07,026
Now, I don't mean

444
00:18:07,028 --> 00:18:09,228
to be nosy, but I am. What's that?

445
00:18:09,737 --> 00:18:12,738
That? Oh, that... Uh, yarn.

446
00:18:12,763 --> 00:18:14,730
Surgical yarn.

447
00:18:15,203 --> 00:18:16,965
Okay, I knit. It relaxes me.

448
00:18:16,966 --> 00:18:19,460
But just please don't
tell the family, okay?

449
00:18:19,474 --> 00:18:21,574
'Cause then they'll finally
have something to tease me about.

450
00:18:21,584 --> 00:18:22,376
There it is.

451
00:18:22,397 --> 00:18:24,374
Aw! I think it's so sweet.

452
00:18:24,375 --> 00:18:27,334
- Yeah. See?
- What is that, a... pot holder?

453
00:18:27,358 --> 00:18:29,549
Or... No! It's a sweater.

454
00:18:30,151 --> 00:18:31,484
Or vest. I...

455
00:18:31,486 --> 00:18:33,249
Maybe it's a sweater vest.

456
00:18:33,250 --> 00:18:34,920
- Let me help you.
- You know how to knit?

457
00:18:34,959 --> 00:18:36,625
- Oh.
- Yeah, my mother wouldn't buy me

458
00:18:36,626 --> 00:18:38,658
a thong, so my abuelita knitted me one.

459
00:18:38,660 --> 00:18:41,828
It was very progressive,
and also very uncomfortable.

460
00:18:41,830 --> 00:18:44,464
Whoa, look at you!
You're like a regular...

461
00:18:44,466 --> 00:18:47,683
- famous knitter.
- There you go.

462
00:18:47,847 --> 00:18:50,150
These past few weeks have been nice.

463
00:18:50,167 --> 00:18:51,542
- Yeah.
- I like that we have our

464
00:18:51,584 --> 00:18:53,544
private little club, and...

465
00:18:53,641 --> 00:18:56,403
it's kind of fun keeping another
secret from my wife, you know?

466
00:18:56,417 --> 00:18:58,876
Oh, you know what?

467
00:18:58,880 --> 00:19:01,184
I'll undo mine. I'll
undo mine. You keep going.

468
00:19:01,209 --> 00:19:03,918
- Oh! You're so patient.
- Yeah.

469
00:19:04,150 --> 00:19:06,386
You know what, you are
gonna make a great mom.

470
00:19:06,388 --> 00:19:08,955
Aw. Thank you so much, Tim.

471
00:19:08,957 --> 00:19:10,424
Sure.

472
00:19:13,918 --> 00:19:16,293
- Psst!
- It was clogged when I went in there!

473
00:19:16,334 --> 00:19:19,293
No... What? No, come here, man.

474
00:19:19,965 --> 00:19:21,707
Colleen told me your little secret.

475
00:19:21,732 --> 00:19:23,817
What? You can't trust her. She's a liar.

476
00:19:23,842 --> 00:19:25,441
No, she says you're a great doctor.

477
00:19:25,466 --> 00:19:28,574
Oh. Then I take back what
I just said. She's lovely.

478
00:19:28,983 --> 00:19:30,777
I was wondering if you would teach me

479
00:19:30,779 --> 00:19:32,545
how to give her the shots myself.

480
00:19:32,570 --> 00:19:34,347
Oh, no, I don't mind doing the shots.

481
00:19:34,349 --> 00:19:35,782
And despite what I just said,

482
00:19:35,784 --> 00:19:37,417
I really do value her friendship.

483
00:19:37,419 --> 00:19:39,552
Okay, but I need to overcome this.

484
00:19:39,554 --> 00:19:41,521
If-if I can do it, man,
she'll be really happy.

485
00:19:41,523 --> 00:19:44,527
Okay. Look, it's gonna
be hard to stick this

486
00:19:44,542 --> 00:19:47,334
into someone you respect, so
just pretend I'm somebody else.

487
00:19:47,373 --> 00:19:50,010
I have to, uh, sanitize the area here

488
00:19:50,035 --> 00:19:51,664
and get a little bit of a...

489
00:19:52,767 --> 00:19:54,574
Oh! I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry!

490
00:19:54,626 --> 00:19:57,138
You just pumped
estrogen into my kidneys!

491
00:19:57,167 --> 00:19:58,459
Oh, no.

492
00:19:58,595 --> 00:19:59,872
Breathe better.

493
00:19:59,874 --> 00:20:01,507
Huh.

494
00:20:02,000 --> 00:20:03,209
Nah.

495
00:20:05,375 --> 00:20:07,239
Hi!

496
00:20:07,240 --> 00:20:09,406
- Oh! Hey!
- Just wanted to stop by

497
00:20:09,408 --> 00:20:11,968
and say thank you so
much for everything.

498
00:20:11,969 --> 00:20:14,042
Matt is doing great.

499
00:20:14,083 --> 00:20:15,959
Well, not exactly great.

500
00:20:15,964 --> 00:20:17,481
But at least he's stopped
crying and he waits

501
00:20:17,501 --> 00:20:18,918
until I leave to throw up.

502
00:20:18,943 --> 00:20:20,851
Well, it took a lot of work.

503
00:20:20,853 --> 00:20:23,171
Matt treated me like a voodoo doll.

504
00:20:23,196 --> 00:20:25,587
Somewhere out there, there's a giant Tim

505
00:20:25,588 --> 00:20:27,543
who's in a lot of pain.

506
00:20:27,544 --> 00:20:29,917
I'm really gonna miss
our needle parties.

507
00:20:29,918 --> 00:20:31,627
- Yeah, me, too.
- Yeah.

508
00:20:31,631 --> 00:20:34,398
Hey. This is for you.

509
00:20:34,542 --> 00:20:36,501
- Aw.
- For helping me learn to knit.

510
00:20:36,533 --> 00:20:37,801
Thank you.

511
00:20:39,739 --> 00:20:41,939
For when you get pregnant.
They're baby booties.

512
00:20:42,507 --> 00:20:43,791
Oh.

513
00:20:43,792 --> 00:20:46,293
- So cute.
- Yeah.

514
00:20:46,709 --> 00:20:51,709
Synced and corrected by Octavia
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