1
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- Synced and corrected by AlexandreMT -
- www.addic7ed.com -

2
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Lovely day for a walk, eh, Holmes?

3
00:01:02,930 --> 00:01:06,265
Yes, just look at our great
city, bustling with activity.

4
00:01:06,266 --> 00:01:08,768
Even the chimney sweeps
are hard at work.

5
00:01:08,769 --> 00:01:10,470
It's all dirty in here.

6
00:01:10,471 --> 00:01:12,205
I don't care. Keep going.

7
00:01:12,206 --> 00:01:14,707
Shouldn't I wear
some sort of protective suit?

8
00:01:14,708 --> 00:01:16,542
Why? Don't you trust me?

9
00:01:16,543 --> 00:01:19,912
I do, but our friend Bartholomew
went in lots of chimneys

10
00:01:19,913 --> 00:01:22,814
in the '80s, and now he's sick.

11
00:01:26,587 --> 00:01:28,955
Holmes, there's something
I have to tell you.

12
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- I'm getting married...
- I deduce, Watson,

13
00:01:30,557 --> 00:01:32,125
- that you're getting married.
- I just said that.

14
00:01:32,126 --> 00:01:33,292
Yes, but I had deduced it first.

15
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That's what happened.

16
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So, congratulations.

17
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Thank you.

18
00:01:36,630 --> 00:01:37,897
I thought you might be upset

19
00:01:37,898 --> 00:01:39,298
because we won't be able
to solve mysteries...

20
00:01:39,299 --> 00:01:40,500
Solve mysteries together.

21
00:01:40,501 --> 00:01:41,834
Elementary.

22
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Crown Jewels stolen!

23
00:01:43,303 --> 00:01:45,738
"Another one bites the dust,"
says Queen.

24
00:01:45,739 --> 00:01:47,640
And coming up, Russia and Prussia

25
00:01:47,641 --> 00:01:50,510
still named basically the same thing.

26
00:01:50,511 --> 00:01:53,513
Ghastly. Who would have
the audacity to steal the crown

27
00:01:53,514 --> 00:01:55,014
off the queen's head?

28
00:01:55,015 --> 00:01:56,716
Only one man, Watson.

29
00:01:56,717 --> 00:01:59,585
Professor Moriarty,
the Napoleon of Crime.

30
00:01:59,586 --> 00:02:01,587
I've had him on the run for a year now.

31
00:02:01,588 --> 00:02:03,289
His criminal empire is in shambles,

32
00:02:03,290 --> 00:02:04,690
but he won't go quietly.

33
00:02:04,691 --> 00:02:07,794
I say, look, there's hotshot
20-year-old comedian

34
00:02:07,795 --> 00:02:09,295
Benjamin Hill.

35
00:02:13,567 --> 00:02:17,236
Oh. That'll be funnier
when he's older and slower.

36
00:02:21,375 --> 00:02:23,910
Watson, this is the boat to America.

37
00:02:23,911 --> 00:02:25,078
How do you know that?

38
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Because Neil Diamond is on board. Look.

39
00:02:27,581 --> 00:02:30,283
? September morn ?

40
00:02:30,284 --> 00:02:34,921
? We danced until the night
became a brand-new day... ?

41
00:02:34,922 --> 00:02:36,956
I really hoped
he'd be singing "America."

42
00:02:36,957 --> 00:02:38,758
Well, how will we know who Moriarty is?

43
00:02:38,759 --> 00:02:39,992
We've never seen him before.

44
00:02:39,993 --> 00:02:41,727
The science of deduction.

45
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Hold it right there, Professor Moriarty.

46
00:02:45,132 --> 00:02:46,466
Sherlock Holmes?

47
00:02:46,467 --> 00:02:47,967
How did you know it was me?

48
00:02:47,968 --> 00:02:50,203
When I see a man
about to go on a sea voyage

49
00:02:50,204 --> 00:02:51,604
and not wearing a topcoat,

50
00:02:51,605 --> 00:02:54,774
with no watch fob, and whose
spats are not fully buttoned...

51
00:02:54,775 --> 00:02:57,310
And the jewels hanging out of my hat?

52
00:02:57,311 --> 00:02:58,944
Yeah, and the jewels
hanging out of your hat.

53
00:03:01,615 --> 00:03:03,950
He's got a gun.
Look out, Stew... Holmes!

54
00:03:03,951 --> 00:03:05,451
God, this is gonna be so annoying.

55
00:03:05,452 --> 00:03:06,752
Watson, the scepter!

56
00:03:09,623 --> 00:03:11,457
Aah! Lucky shot.

57
00:03:11,458 --> 00:03:13,059
There was no luck involved.

58
00:03:13,060 --> 00:03:14,594
From the angle you were aiming the gun,

59
00:03:14,595 --> 00:03:16,395
I extrapolated the path of the bullet,

60
00:03:16,396 --> 00:03:18,331
and triangulated the deflection point...

61
00:03:18,332 --> 00:03:20,266
Uh, is this... is this speech for me?

62
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Because he's dead.

63
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For the court's amusement,

64
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we now present Sir William of Cosby.

65
00:03:34,815 --> 00:03:37,483
Well, you see, the children
of today are wearing

66
00:03:37,484 --> 00:03:39,952
their pantaloons so low, gazoozle,

67
00:03:39,953 --> 00:03:42,955
you can see the first three
layers of their undergarments,

68
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zazzle, zoozle.

69
00:03:48,095 --> 00:03:52,298
I get away with this
for another 122 years, you see.

70
00:03:52,299 --> 00:03:55,535
Hello, Your Majesty, I have
recovered the Crown Jewels.

71
00:03:55,536 --> 00:03:57,870
Mum, may I say, it's been
a pleasure serving you,

72
00:03:57,871 --> 00:03:59,505
but I've decided to retire.

73
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We are losing interest
in this conversation.

74
00:04:02,476 --> 00:04:05,845
It would be a wonderful cap on
my career to have a knighthood.

75
00:04:05,846 --> 00:04:08,114
Come, come, now, Holmes, you're not...

76
00:04:09,616 --> 00:04:11,384
Sometimes the bigger ladies

77
00:04:11,385 --> 00:04:13,985
take a little longer, you see.

78
00:04:26,533 --> 00:04:28,401
Really, Holmes, why retire?

79
00:04:28,402 --> 00:04:30,236
There will still be crimes to solve.

80
00:04:30,237 --> 00:04:32,872
But with Moriarty gone,
and with you, my biographer,

81
00:04:32,873 --> 00:04:35,508
leaving me for marriage,
there is little point.

82
00:04:35,509 --> 00:04:37,710
Just gonna toss it in the old waste bin.

83
00:04:37,711 --> 00:04:40,046
Yup. Good-bye, detective cap.

84
00:04:40,047 --> 00:04:42,013
Yeah.

85
00:04:44,184 --> 00:04:47,186
And you, old chap, are about
to solve the biggest mystery

86
00:04:47,187 --> 00:04:50,022
facing men of our time:
the wedding night.

87
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I know, I'm just, I'm just giddy
with anticipation.

88
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Lifting her nightgown,
nightshirt, evening cape,

89
00:04:55,796 --> 00:04:58,030
boudoir coverall, torso doily,

90
00:04:58,031 --> 00:05:00,333
and the various corsets
and trusses below.

91
00:05:00,334 --> 00:05:02,168
Exposing her shame to God,

92
00:05:02,169 --> 00:05:05,171
followed by brief missionary
coitus with no eye contact.

93
00:05:05,172 --> 00:05:06,672
And then, five months later,

94
00:05:06,673 --> 00:05:09,342
a stillborn child
the size of a digestive biscuit.

95
00:05:12,379 --> 00:05:13,546
Constance.

96
00:05:13,547 --> 00:05:16,415
John.

97
00:05:16,416 --> 00:05:18,117
- Hey.
- 'Sup?

98
00:05:18,118 --> 00:05:20,586
So, my betrothed,
how go the wedding plans?

99
00:05:20,587 --> 00:05:23,222
Oh, John, my father
is sparing no expense.

100
00:05:23,223 --> 00:05:26,826
Boiled beef for every guest,
fish head stew, old cheese,

101
00:05:26,827 --> 00:05:28,494
and men's attire will be provided

102
00:05:28,495 --> 00:05:30,129
by Gentlemen's Wearhouse.

103
00:05:30,130 --> 00:05:33,865
You're gonna fancy the way
you look, this I vouchsafe.

104
00:05:35,202 --> 00:05:36,235
What is it, Holmes?

105
00:05:36,236 --> 00:05:37,336
It's an urgent missive

106
00:05:37,337 --> 00:05:39,605
from Inspector Lestrade
of Scotland Yard.

107
00:05:39,606 --> 00:05:42,942
Oh, darn, there's been a murder
and he's begging for my help.

108
00:05:42,943 --> 00:05:46,045
Oh, darn, darn, darn,
this is embarrassing.

109
00:05:46,046 --> 00:05:49,348
Now I've got to see if I can
dig that hat out of the trash.

110
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Come, Watson, the game is afoot.

111
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"Afoot"?

112
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"Starting," "beginning."

113
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Well, then just say that.

114
00:05:57,224 --> 00:05:58,991
Enjoying all the old-timey jokes?

115
00:05:58,992 --> 00:06:02,527
Don't worry, next week,
back to a normal episode.

116
00:06:07,601 --> 00:06:09,935
Hmm, this is most curious.

117
00:06:09,936 --> 00:06:13,606
It appears she was killed by our
old nemesis, the Scottish Brute.

118
00:06:13,607 --> 00:06:15,341
That's impossible, he's in prison.

119
00:06:15,342 --> 00:06:17,143
I put him there myself one year ago.

120
00:06:17,144 --> 00:06:19,512
Nevertheless,
we can't ignore the evidence.

121
00:06:19,513 --> 00:06:21,213
All his victims were prostitutes

122
00:06:21,214 --> 00:06:23,015
whose names began with the letter "V."

123
00:06:23,016 --> 00:06:25,651
This one's name is Veronica,
as evidenced

124
00:06:25,652 --> 00:06:29,488
by this satin softball jacket
that bears her name.

125
00:06:29,489 --> 00:06:32,358
These threads are from
a Scotsman's plaid kilt.

126
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The telltale locks of red hair.

127
00:06:35,295 --> 00:06:38,297
But most significantly,
the Scottish Brute replaced

128
00:06:38,298 --> 00:06:41,167
his victims' intestines with bagpipes.

129
00:06:42,969 --> 00:06:44,570
Want to give it a whirl?

130
00:06:57,517 --> 00:06:59,518
How could he accomplish
this murder from prison?

131
00:06:59,519 --> 00:07:00,686
He couldn't.

132
00:07:00,687 --> 00:07:03,089
There are only
two possible explanations:

133
00:07:03,090 --> 00:07:05,157
either there's a murderer who has copied

134
00:07:05,158 --> 00:07:09,327
the Scottish Brute's methods,
or I put the wrong man away.

135
00:07:21,408 --> 00:07:22,875
What are you in for?

136
00:07:22,876 --> 00:07:25,678
Ah, I Rathboned somebody's Cumberbatch.

137
00:07:35,021 --> 00:07:36,555
Well, well, well.

138
00:07:36,556 --> 00:07:39,525
If it ain't me old nemesis,
Sherlock Holmes.

139
00:07:39,526 --> 00:07:41,527
Hello, Brute, I've got
some questions for you.

140
00:07:41,528 --> 00:07:43,596
Who did you tell about the murders?

141
00:07:43,597 --> 00:07:46,465
Nae a soul, 'cause I dinna
commit no murders.

142
00:07:46,466 --> 00:07:48,234
I'm innocent, you nosy parker.

143
00:07:48,235 --> 00:07:49,402
How can I believe you?

144
00:07:49,403 --> 00:07:50,870
You're a common criminal.

145
00:07:50,871 --> 00:07:54,540
All the prostitutes were killed
by a left-handed assailant.

146
00:07:54,541 --> 00:07:56,976
- So?
- So, I was born with...

147
00:07:56,977 --> 00:07:58,744
two right hands.

148
00:07:58,745 --> 00:08:00,446
Dear God.

149
00:08:00,447 --> 00:08:02,548
That means he couldn't
have been the killer.

150
00:08:02,549 --> 00:08:06,485
That's right. You ever seen
a man with two right hand...

151
00:08:06,486 --> 00:08:08,220
Oh, this... this thing was open.

152
00:08:08,221 --> 00:08:09,555
That shouldn't be open, right?

153
00:08:09,556 --> 00:08:11,184
No, no, I wouldn't think so.

154
00:08:16,918 --> 00:08:19,586
I hope you will accept
my sincere apologies.

155
00:08:19,587 --> 00:08:22,055
Oh, you've done more than
made up for it, Mr. Holmes.

156
00:08:22,056 --> 00:08:23,857
I'm just happy to be free.

157
00:08:23,858 --> 00:08:26,293
Ah, the world's changed
since I've been in there.

158
00:08:26,294 --> 00:08:28,261
That puddle wasn't here.

159
00:08:28,262 --> 00:08:29,896
That cloud wasn't there.

160
00:08:29,897 --> 00:08:31,732
That window was open.

161
00:08:31,733 --> 00:08:33,967
That lady was four feet that way.

162
00:08:33,968 --> 00:08:35,702
All right, well, I hope
you make a go of it.

163
00:08:35,703 --> 00:08:37,404
Good luck with your fresh start.

164
00:08:37,405 --> 00:08:39,840
Oh, where'd that bird come from?

165
00:08:39,841 --> 00:08:41,307
That's new.

166
00:08:46,013 --> 00:08:48,849
Watson, I found
some important new clues.

167
00:08:48,850 --> 00:08:51,284
These red locks of hair
I found at the crime scene?

168
00:08:51,285 --> 00:08:53,253
They don't belong to the Scottish Brute.

169
00:08:53,254 --> 00:08:54,955
They belong to a woman.

170
00:08:54,956 --> 00:08:55,956
How can you tell?

171
00:08:55,957 --> 00:08:57,357
It's hard to explain, Watson.

172
00:08:57,358 --> 00:08:58,825
Women are mysterious.

173
00:08:58,826 --> 00:09:00,093
But don't ask me.

174
00:09:00,094 --> 00:09:03,263
Ask contemporary personality
Oscar Wilde.

175
00:09:03,264 --> 00:09:08,034
I prefer a man with a future
and a woman with a past.

176
00:09:08,035 --> 00:09:09,236
Oh, splendid.

177
00:09:09,237 --> 00:09:11,104
Well said, splendid.

178
00:09:11,105 --> 00:09:12,973
All right, let's get out of here
before we're all arrested

179
00:09:12,974 --> 00:09:15,474
for the crime of "bum-fancy."

180
00:09:18,146 --> 00:09:22,716
And now I will disguise myself
as a prostitute named Valerie.

181
00:09:22,717 --> 00:09:24,117
What the devil is that?

182
00:09:24,118 --> 00:09:25,352
It's my own invention.

183
00:09:25,353 --> 00:09:27,487
A steam-driven mechanical exoskeleton.

184
00:09:27,488 --> 00:09:28,788
Observe.

185
00:09:33,528 --> 00:09:36,730
It's cutting-edge technology, Watson!

186
00:09:36,731 --> 00:09:38,331
Exchange money

187
00:09:38,332 --> 00:09:40,367
for sexual services, guv'nor.

188
00:09:40,368 --> 00:09:41,435
Are you a bobby?

189
00:09:41,436 --> 00:09:42,536
You have to tell me.

190
00:09:42,537 --> 00:09:43,804
Mind the gap.

191
00:09:43,805 --> 00:09:45,238
Astounding.

192
00:09:45,239 --> 00:09:47,574
Yes. Now, I'll stroll around the block,

193
00:09:47,575 --> 00:09:50,744
and you'll proposition me, loud
enough so the killer can hear.

194
00:09:50,745 --> 00:09:52,212
Love for sale.

195
00:09:52,213 --> 00:09:54,815
Appetizing young love for sale.

196
00:09:54,816 --> 00:09:57,117
? Love that's fresh
and still unspoiled ?

197
00:09:57,118 --> 00:09:59,553
? Love that's only slightly soiled... ?

198
00:09:59,554 --> 00:10:00,687
Love for sale.

199
00:10:00,688 --> 00:10:01,855
Lookin' good, honey.

200
00:10:01,856 --> 00:10:02,956
No blacks.

201
00:10:02,957 --> 00:10:04,357
Love for sale.

202
00:10:04,358 --> 00:10:06,992
Race-contingent love for sale.

203
00:10:13,734 --> 00:10:16,837
Did I hear your name was Valerie?

204
00:10:16,838 --> 00:10:18,071
Yeah, guv'nor.

205
00:10:18,072 --> 00:10:19,239
Uh, have we met?

206
00:10:19,240 --> 00:10:21,540
Your voice sounds very familiar.

207
00:10:30,351 --> 00:10:31,952
What the hell is this?

208
00:10:31,953 --> 00:10:33,153
Watson, hurry!

209
00:10:33,154 --> 00:10:34,387
Watson?

210
00:10:34,388 --> 00:10:35,956
Oh, my God, Sherlock!

211
00:10:35,957 --> 00:10:38,859
Watson, help.

212
00:10:38,860 --> 00:10:40,626
Watson.

213
00:10:42,663 --> 00:10:46,500
All I would've done
is be a perfect gentleman.

214
00:10:46,501 --> 00:10:48,168
Sorry, got distracted.

215
00:10:48,169 --> 00:10:50,270
Lot of rats in London.

216
00:10:50,271 --> 00:10:51,737
That's for you.

217
00:10:55,510 --> 00:10:57,377
Sorry we didn't
catch the murderer, Holmes.

218
00:10:57,378 --> 00:10:59,412
And I'm afraid you'll
have to catch her without me.

219
00:10:59,413 --> 00:11:00,714
My wedding is tomorrow.

220
00:11:00,715 --> 00:11:02,382
Yes, about that, you know,
I was thinking.

221
00:11:02,383 --> 00:11:04,484
Maybe you should put that off
for a little while.

222
00:11:04,485 --> 00:11:06,620
You know, sow a few more wild oats.

223
00:11:06,621 --> 00:11:08,255
Oh, I've done enough of that, my friend,

224
00:11:08,256 --> 00:11:10,457
especially after that
raucous bachelor party trip

225
00:11:10,458 --> 00:11:12,324
you threw for me in Las Vegas.

226
00:11:14,996 --> 00:11:17,397
So... when do the strippers arrive?

227
00:11:17,398 --> 00:11:19,633
1952.

228
00:11:19,634 --> 00:11:22,669
Watson, I don't know
how to tell you this...

229
00:11:22,670 --> 00:11:25,305
but the murderer
we've been looking for...

230
00:11:25,306 --> 00:11:27,073
it's your fiancée, Constance.

231
00:11:27,074 --> 00:11:29,175
You lie! You're just jealous!

232
00:11:29,176 --> 00:11:31,278
Well, let's go to her place
and I'll show you.

233
00:11:31,279 --> 00:11:34,247
Sorry, today was y'all's cleaning day.

234
00:11:34,248 --> 00:11:36,082
Y'all want me to come back later?

235
00:11:36,083 --> 00:11:37,417
M-Maybe, maybe, yeah.

236
00:11:37,418 --> 00:11:38,818
M-Maybe, maybe another day.

237
00:11:38,819 --> 00:11:40,453
That's fine, I'll pull out.

238
00:11:40,454 --> 00:11:43,290
Just go easy,
it really hurt on the way in.

239
00:11:43,291 --> 00:11:45,992
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!

240
00:11:45,993 --> 00:11:47,927
Ow! Ow! Ow!

241
00:11:52,233 --> 00:11:55,502
Constance? Are you here?

242
00:11:55,503 --> 00:11:58,405
She's... she's gone.

243
00:11:58,406 --> 00:12:00,340
I'm sorry, Watson. Unfortunately,

244
00:12:00,341 --> 00:12:02,475
it appears my deductions were correct.

245
00:12:02,476 --> 00:12:04,578
Not so fast. Look, she left a note.

246
00:12:04,579 --> 00:12:06,479
See, Holmes? It says here...

247
00:12:06,480 --> 00:12:09,215
these are test results.
She has gonorrhea.

248
00:12:09,216 --> 00:12:10,650
I...

249
00:12:10,651 --> 00:12:12,319
I can't believe it.

250
00:12:12,320 --> 00:12:14,521
My beloved Constance is the murderer.

251
00:12:14,522 --> 00:12:16,089
It's even worse than you think.

252
00:12:16,090 --> 00:12:18,425
If she's a murderer
from this time period,

253
00:12:18,426 --> 00:12:20,994
that means there will be
a terrible, pretentious musical

254
00:12:20,995 --> 00:12:22,629
about her one day.

255
00:12:25,032 --> 00:12:27,601
? Behold the tale of Constance ?

256
00:12:27,602 --> 00:12:30,136
? The murderer in the bonnet ?

257
00:12:30,137 --> 00:12:34,007
? The murderer in the bonnet. ?

258
00:12:34,008 --> 00:12:36,343
Oh, I was wrong, I love it.

259
00:12:36,344 --> 00:12:37,677
Will Watson and Holmes

260
00:12:37,678 --> 00:12:39,145
track down Constance?

261
00:12:39,146 --> 00:12:40,447
We'll be right back

262
00:12:40,448 --> 00:12:42,749
after these
turn of the century messages.

263
00:12:42,750 --> 00:12:46,586
Another dull night
at the gentlemen's club.

264
00:12:46,587 --> 00:12:49,289
What we need is
some room temperature gin.

265
00:12:49,290 --> 00:12:50,724
'Ello, gents.

266
00:12:50,725 --> 00:12:52,959
Fancy some Room Temperature Gin?

267
00:12:52,960 --> 00:12:54,361
Shut up, you slag!

268
00:12:54,362 --> 00:12:55,795
No women allowed.

269
00:12:55,796 --> 00:12:57,497
Room Temperature Gin:

270
00:12:57,498 --> 00:12:58,765
drink it without women,

271
00:12:58,766 --> 00:13:00,566
have an eel pie, then go to bed.

272
00:13:05,033 --> 00:13:08,002
Constance had the tickets
for our honeymoon to Paris.

273
00:13:08,003 --> 00:13:09,904
No doubt she'll be using those
for her escape.

274
00:13:09,905 --> 00:13:11,605
Very well. Then we're off to France.

275
00:13:11,606 --> 00:13:14,075
That's right. We're off to Gay Paree.

276
00:13:14,076 --> 00:13:15,910
- What's this now?
- Gay Paree.

277
00:13:15,911 --> 00:13:17,411
Some... some people call it "Gay Paree."

278
00:13:17,412 --> 00:13:19,813
Oh, then I suppose I should change.

279
00:13:21,850 --> 00:13:25,686
Let's get separate rooms just so
we can spread our stuff out.

280
00:13:32,727 --> 00:13:34,228
Quick, we've got to catch the train!

281
00:13:34,229 --> 00:13:36,229
Porter!

282
00:13:38,066 --> 00:13:39,800
Watson, do you have thruppence
for the porter?

283
00:13:39,801 --> 00:13:40,968
I have tuppence.

284
00:13:40,969 --> 00:13:42,103
So you don't have thruppence?

285
00:13:42,104 --> 00:13:43,804
I have tuppence. How much do you have?

286
00:13:43,805 --> 00:13:44,972
I have nuppence.

287
00:13:44,973 --> 00:13:46,707
You're gonna get a comeuppance.

288
00:13:52,914 --> 00:13:55,683
Excuse me, sir, what's the next
stop for this train?

289
00:13:57,552 --> 00:14:00,554
Ugh, I hate when they let
the infirm ride on the train.

290
00:14:00,555 --> 00:14:04,458
Next stop, (BABBLING) Station.

291
00:14:04,459 --> 00:14:07,928
Sir, you owe an apology to me
and all the good people

292
00:14:07,929 --> 00:14:11,398
of (BABBLING).

293
00:14:11,399 --> 00:14:14,969
It's nice of the locals to act
as their own train crossings.

294
00:14:14,970 --> 00:14:17,937
Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding,
ding, ding, ding, ding.

295
00:14:26,414 --> 00:14:28,415
You know, I've never crossed
the English Channel before.

296
00:14:28,416 --> 00:14:30,151
I hope no one from the train
is on this boat.

297
00:14:30,152 --> 00:14:31,318
I'm wearing the same outfit.

298
00:14:31,319 --> 00:14:32,686
I wouldn't worry.

299
00:14:32,687 --> 00:14:35,089
Looks like it's just a bunch
of minor celebrities.

300
00:14:44,866 --> 00:14:46,666
? Love ?

301
00:14:48,603 --> 00:14:52,640
? Exciting and new ?

302
00:14:52,641 --> 00:14:54,108
? Come aboard. ?

303
00:15:00,115 --> 00:15:02,082
Finally, Paris.

304
00:15:02,083 --> 00:15:03,784
What an ordeal.

305
00:15:03,785 --> 00:15:05,119
Yes, but how do we find Constance

306
00:15:05,120 --> 00:15:06,287
in one of the biggest cities...

307
00:15:06,288 --> 00:15:07,588
There she is.

308
00:15:09,157 --> 00:15:10,758
Quick, after her. We have to chase her

309
00:15:10,759 --> 00:15:12,293
through a series of shots where she has

310
00:15:12,294 --> 00:15:14,628
an inconsistent lead on us.

311
00:15:42,190 --> 00:15:43,357
This way, Holmes.

312
00:15:43,358 --> 00:15:45,125
She's heading towards... Holmes?

313
00:15:45,126 --> 00:15:47,628
I couldn't come here and not do this.

314
00:15:47,629 --> 00:15:49,963
She has appendicitis, by the way.

315
00:15:55,170 --> 00:15:56,570
She must have gone up
this strange building.

316
00:15:56,571 --> 00:15:57,705
What is it?

317
00:15:57,706 --> 00:15:59,139
It's the brand-new Eiffel Tower.

318
00:15:59,140 --> 00:16:00,407
Well, let's hurry.

319
00:16:00,408 --> 00:16:02,042
- She's getting...
- Oh, oh, hold on, hold on.

320
00:16:02,043 --> 00:16:03,377
I think we may have just photobombed

321
00:16:03,378 --> 00:16:04,678
that family's picture.

322
00:16:21,730 --> 00:16:23,564
You'll never catch me.

323
00:16:25,066 --> 00:16:27,200
Damn it, my heel is caught.

324
00:16:30,071 --> 00:16:31,371
Constance!

325
00:16:32,507 --> 00:16:33,674
Hang on, my darling.

326
00:16:33,675 --> 00:16:37,011
John, I did it for him.

327
00:16:37,012 --> 00:16:39,046
And you didn't mean to hurt me?

328
00:16:39,047 --> 00:16:41,248
No, you're not getting what I'm saying.

329
00:16:41,249 --> 00:16:43,584
I didn't care about you at all.

330
00:16:43,585 --> 00:16:45,019
Who did you do this for?

331
00:16:45,020 --> 00:16:47,521
Why were you killing prostitutes
with the initial "V"?

332
00:16:48,857 --> 00:16:50,758
The great Sherlock Holmes.

333
00:16:50,759 --> 00:16:52,760
He said you'd never figure it out,

334
00:16:52,761 --> 00:16:55,062
and that he'd be victorious.

335
00:16:58,933 --> 00:17:00,100
Constance!

336
00:17:04,105 --> 00:17:07,408
Ugh. Depardieu!

337
00:17:12,914 --> 00:17:15,916
I can't believe she's gone, Holmes.

338
00:17:15,917 --> 00:17:17,318
Oh, you'll find someone.

339
00:17:17,319 --> 00:17:19,053
You're a good guy with a great body.

340
00:17:19,054 --> 00:17:20,721
I still don't understand what she meant

341
00:17:20,722 --> 00:17:23,090
by "he said you'd never
figure it out, and..."

342
00:17:23,091 --> 00:17:24,591
"That he'd be victorious."

343
00:17:24,592 --> 00:17:26,260
Watson, that's it.

344
00:17:26,261 --> 00:17:28,062
Didn't think I'd figure it out.

345
00:17:28,063 --> 00:17:31,465
This calls for the old Sherlock
Holmes celebratory smoke.

346
00:17:31,466 --> 00:17:32,932
I'll just light my pipe.

347
00:17:55,757 --> 00:17:57,858
What is the meaning of this?

348
00:17:57,859 --> 00:17:59,860
I'll be replacing your innards

349
00:17:59,861 --> 00:18:02,129
with these bagpipes, Queen Victoria.

350
00:18:02,130 --> 00:18:05,032
Not before we put you in jail.

351
00:18:05,033 --> 00:18:06,233
What's with this "we" crap?

352
00:18:06,234 --> 00:18:07,368
It's just you.

353
00:18:07,369 --> 00:18:11,271
Oh, no, it's "we."

354
00:18:12,373 --> 00:18:14,575
We made it just in time.

355
00:18:14,576 --> 00:18:17,878
And I was able to fool you,
as I am a master of disguise.

356
00:18:17,879 --> 00:18:20,447
Seems like you're just good
at dressing up like a woman.

357
00:18:20,448 --> 00:18:22,349
Ah, you caught me, Mr. Holmes.

358
00:18:22,350 --> 00:18:24,485
I suppose it's back to jail for me.

359
00:18:24,486 --> 00:18:28,021
You can dispense with the act,
Professor Moriarty.

360
00:18:28,022 --> 00:18:29,356
Holmes, what are you talking about?

361
00:18:29,357 --> 00:18:30,991
Moriarty's dead. You killed him.

362
00:18:30,992 --> 00:18:32,926
No, that was one of his lackeys.

363
00:18:32,927 --> 00:18:34,862
Isn't that right, Professor?

364
00:18:34,863 --> 00:18:36,663
Very clever, Holmes.

365
00:18:36,664 --> 00:18:38,198
What gave me away?

366
00:18:38,199 --> 00:18:41,502
Constance. She said
that you'd be victorious.

367
00:18:41,503 --> 00:18:43,036
That was the vital clue

368
00:18:43,037 --> 00:18:45,472
that these murders were for my benefit.

369
00:18:45,473 --> 00:18:47,808
I was dismantling your criminal empire,

370
00:18:47,809 --> 00:18:49,308
and you wanted revenge.

371
00:18:57,519 --> 00:19:00,287
You cannot catch what you cannot see.

372
00:19:02,991 --> 00:19:05,993
So, you concocted
an elaborate series of murders

373
00:19:05,994 --> 00:19:07,094
with clues leading me

374
00:19:07,095 --> 00:19:09,163
to the fictional Scottish Brute.

375
00:19:09,164 --> 00:19:11,498
Meanwhile, two toothless,
British homeless people

376
00:19:11,499 --> 00:19:13,367
had filthy sex in an alleyway.

377
00:19:13,368 --> 00:19:14,902
They would become the grandparents

378
00:19:14,903 --> 00:19:16,469
of the guys from Oasis.

379
00:19:19,073 --> 00:19:21,008
Meanwhile, you had your girlfriend

380
00:19:21,009 --> 00:19:22,508
seduce my best friend.

381
00:19:28,349 --> 00:19:30,116
She arranges for me
to kill your imposter...

382
00:19:31,252 --> 00:19:33,821
and commits an identical murder

383
00:19:33,822 --> 00:19:36,790
so I would come
to the inescapable conclusion

384
00:19:36,791 --> 00:19:38,459
that I put the wrong man away.

385
00:19:38,460 --> 00:19:40,527
Constance would lead us
away from England

386
00:19:40,528 --> 00:19:42,729
while you killed the last "prostitute"

387
00:19:42,730 --> 00:19:44,031
with the name "V."

388
00:19:44,032 --> 00:19:45,866
And I'd get the blame
for freeing the man

389
00:19:45,867 --> 00:19:47,734
who killed our beloved queen.

390
00:19:47,735 --> 00:19:48,969
Brilliant.

391
00:19:48,970 --> 00:19:51,138
Why do you think
Queen Victoria's a prostitute?

392
00:19:51,139 --> 00:19:52,973
She formed an alliance
with the Dutch royals

393
00:19:52,974 --> 00:19:55,042
for shared control of Guyana.

394
00:19:55,043 --> 00:19:56,710
So... political.

395
00:19:56,711 --> 00:19:58,812
One last mystery to solve.

396
00:19:58,813 --> 00:20:00,747
Why do they call you Professor?

397
00:20:00,748 --> 00:20:02,583
- I teach at Hogwarts.
- Really?

398
00:20:02,584 --> 00:20:05,719
No. But we should've done that
instead of this.

399
00:20:09,724 --> 00:20:11,758
Holmes, with this case,

400
00:20:11,759 --> 00:20:13,861
you saved the entire British Empire.

401
00:20:13,862 --> 00:20:16,029
Yes. Now it will last forever.

402
00:20:16,030 --> 00:20:18,131
From South Africa to the Suez Canal,

403
00:20:18,132 --> 00:20:19,833
from Cyprus to Australia,

404
00:20:19,834 --> 00:20:21,702
all of Canada and Grenada,

405
00:20:21,703 --> 00:20:24,471
even Antigua and Jamaica.

406
00:20:24,472 --> 00:20:26,373
India, Jordan, Kenya, Kuwait,

407
00:20:26,374 --> 00:20:28,408
Malawi, Bermuda, the Falklands.

408
00:20:28,409 --> 00:20:30,610
Yes, all part of our empire.

409
00:20:32,413 --> 00:20:33,714
I'll always miss...

410
00:20:33,715 --> 00:20:34,982
The Maldives, Myanmar,

411
00:20:34,983 --> 00:20:36,950
New Zealand, Nigeria, Pakistan.

412
00:20:36,951 --> 00:20:38,685
Saint Kitts and Nevis.

413
00:20:38,686 --> 00:20:40,654
Sri Lanka, the Sudan, Uganda,

414
00:20:40,655 --> 00:20:42,322
and the United Arab Emirates.

415
00:20:42,323 --> 00:20:44,258
God, England sucks now.

416
00:20:47,225 --> 00:20:50,725
- Synced and corrected by AlexandreMT -
- www.addic7ed.com -