1
00:00:02,640 --> 00:00:05,638
Oh, my God. It is such a beautiful day.

2
00:00:05,763 --> 00:00:08,726
Oh, I didn't realize you
could see the river from here.

3
00:00:08,942 --> 00:00:11,746
What's that up in the sky?

4
00:00:12,966 --> 00:00:14,514
Is it a bird?

5
00:00:16,736 --> 00:00:18,771
Is it a plane?

6
00:00:21,855 --> 00:00:23,970
Oh, it's a little man.

7
00:00:23,999 --> 00:00:27,773
Land dwellers, feel the
wrath of the Sea Troll!

8
00:00:32,843 --> 00:00:35,692
You seriously can't tell the
difference between a bird and a plane?

9
00:01:04,941 --> 00:01:08,200
- Synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.addic7ed.com -

10
00:01:09,921 --> 00:01:14,903
As many of you know, Alma is
retiring after 40 years here.

11
00:01:14,940 --> 00:01:17,267
Yeah, Alma!

12
00:01:18,490 --> 00:01:21,763
There is no shortage to the anecdotes...

13
00:01:21,785 --> 00:01:24,048
the wonderful anecdotes
from that time...

14
00:01:28,856 --> 00:01:30,597
Ahh!

15
00:01:30,645 --> 00:01:35,447
Anyway, here is a $25 gift
card to Burrito Gigante.

16
00:01:35,501 --> 00:01:37,619
- Ohh.
- That's about one burrito

17
00:01:37,643 --> 00:01:39,427
for every seven years you worked here.

18
00:01:39,498 --> 00:01:41,663
One Gigante burrito.

19
00:01:43,771 --> 00:01:45,087
ˇOlé!

20
00:01:45,796 --> 00:01:49,279
She's been here that long
and that was her sendoff?

21
00:01:49,321 --> 00:01:52,573
- What, no dinner? No party?
- If it helps, I stole a bunch of pills

22
00:01:52,621 --> 00:01:54,702
from her desk, but I
could put them back.

23
00:01:54,714 --> 00:01:56,080
That's a good start,
Wendy, but this is...

24
00:01:56,110 --> 00:01:57,836
- Unacceptable?
- Yeah!

25
00:01:57,864 --> 00:01:59,921
And you're gonna do something about it?

26
00:02:01,246 --> 00:02:03,417
We've been working together
for such a short time,

27
00:02:03,435 --> 00:02:05,526
and yet, you know me so well.

28
00:02:07,503 --> 00:02:10,073
Van, I wanna talk to you
about this whole Alma thing.

29
00:02:10,139 --> 00:02:11,464
Oh, come on.

30
00:02:11,589 --> 00:02:14,141
It was 20 years ago. We were snowed in.

31
00:02:14,767 --> 00:02:16,163
She taught me things.

32
00:02:16,426 --> 00:02:17,762
What?

33
00:02:18,651 --> 00:02:22,444
No, we need to give her
a proper retirement party.

34
00:02:22,516 --> 00:02:24,329
Just have Corporate throw
down a little cash and we...

35
00:02:24,335 --> 00:02:25,736
Let me stop you there.
You know what happens

36
00:02:25,754 --> 00:02:27,281
when you ask Corporate for money?

37
00:02:27,329 --> 00:02:29,315
They ask you, "What
happened to the other money?"

38
00:02:29,351 --> 00:02:31,392
And then suddenly, all of
your lavish sushi lunches

39
00:02:31,410 --> 00:02:33,223
turn into regular sushi lunches.

40
00:02:33,241 --> 00:02:37,065
Have you ever had regular
sushi? It's just okay.

41
00:02:37,190 --> 00:02:38,306
Okay, come on.

42
00:02:38,330 --> 00:02:40,227
We're supposed to be a family.

43
00:02:40,292 --> 00:02:41,849
And we should look out for each other.

44
00:02:41,862 --> 00:02:43,859
Which is it? We're a family
or we look out for each other?

45
00:02:43,931 --> 00:02:46,981
So you're saying you don't
wanna do something extra

46
00:02:47,010 --> 00:02:49,205
- for your oldest employee?
- No.

47
00:02:49,259 --> 00:02:51,629
- Oh.
- Look, I am trying to climb the corporate ladder.

48
00:02:51,677 --> 00:02:53,246
I've already stepped on those rungs.

49
00:02:53,264 --> 00:02:56,576
You do not get to Gotham
by helping people below you.

50
00:02:56,701 --> 00:02:58,358
That's why you suck up.

51
00:02:58,704 --> 00:03:01,633
- This is...
- Unacceptable, I know. Get out.

52
00:03:03,784 --> 00:03:04,851
Jackie.

53
00:03:04,976 --> 00:03:07,043
I wanna eat at Lavish Sushi today.

54
00:03:07,448 --> 00:03:09,996
Jackie, what is wrong with Van?

55
00:03:10,025 --> 00:03:12,447
Raised by his nanny, doesn't read books,

56
00:03:12,572 --> 00:03:14,064
still quotes "Borat."

57
00:03:14,123 --> 00:03:17,225
Okay, a boss is supposed
to care about his employees.

58
00:03:17,255 --> 00:03:18,697
At my father's flower shop,

59
00:03:18,715 --> 00:03:20,940
any time someone
celebrated an anniversary,

60
00:03:20,976 --> 00:03:22,794
he would give them a
big gift and a cake.

61
00:03:22,861 --> 00:03:25,266
Wow, I wish someone
would give me a prize

62
00:03:25,299 --> 00:03:27,137
for not killing myself.

63
00:03:27,194 --> 00:03:29,528
Where I grew up, there
was a sense of community,

64
00:03:29,571 --> 00:03:30,830
of the greater good.

65
00:03:30,859 --> 00:03:32,820
Oh, my God. You grew up in a cult.

66
00:03:32,858 --> 00:03:35,382
- No, Kansas.
- Oh, I'm sorry.

67
00:03:35,430 --> 00:03:37,453
At least the sex is good in a cult.

68
00:03:37,885 --> 00:03:39,295
Let me do you a favor.

69
00:03:39,580 --> 00:03:41,541
You're never gonna get far in life

70
00:03:41,565 --> 00:03:43,368
unless you look out for yourself.

71
00:03:43,493 --> 00:03:45,091
No, that's not true.

72
00:03:45,124 --> 00:03:47,894
My dream is to be the
next Archibald Stylus.

73
00:03:47,895 --> 00:03:51,072
He runs the Wayne Foundation and
all they ever do is help people.

74
00:03:51,102 --> 00:03:54,260
Yeah, he's also the dick who turned
my corporate Christmas present

75
00:03:54,282 --> 00:03:56,310
into a donation in my name.

76
00:03:56,340 --> 00:03:59,471
Your gift gave an impoverished
woman a cell phone and a goat.

77
00:03:59,501 --> 00:04:01,129
Screw her. I want a bathrobe.

78
00:04:01,254 --> 00:04:03,557
Hey, you know who wants a bathrobe?

79
00:04:03,811 --> 00:04:06,378
My wife!

80
00:04:09,883 --> 00:04:11,526
It is so forced.

81
00:04:12,248 --> 00:04:13,820
He's not even married.

82
00:04:14,145 --> 00:04:16,805
Ugh, I can't believe I have to
retest these motion detectors.

83
00:04:16,817 --> 00:04:18,931
When did Chinese orphans getting
paid less than a dollar a day

84
00:04:18,935 --> 00:04:20,661
stop taking pride in their work?

85
00:04:22,577 --> 00:04:23,863
What the hell is that?

86
00:04:23,864 --> 00:04:25,236
Oh, it's for my grandma.

87
00:04:25,274 --> 00:04:27,717
She met a guy online
that lives in Metropolis.

88
00:04:27,770 --> 00:04:29,558
Oh, you better watch out. She
might be getting catfished.

89
00:04:29,596 --> 00:04:32,045
Oh, she's definitely getting
catfished, because it's me.

90
00:04:32,809 --> 00:04:34,779
What? It makes her happy.

91
00:04:34,789 --> 00:04:36,989
Plus, I always avoid the sex questions.

92
00:04:37,361 --> 00:04:39,255
Anyway, I mean, she has arthritis.

93
00:04:39,264 --> 00:04:41,221
So it's hard for her to take selfies.

94
00:04:41,408 --> 00:04:44,745
I control it with my brain. It
senses when I'm at my most confident

95
00:04:44,793 --> 00:04:46,844
so it always takes the perfect selfie.

96
00:04:48,055 --> 00:04:49,622
See? Like that.

97
00:04:49,747 --> 00:04:52,088
Holy crap. Ron, this is amazing.

98
00:04:52,130 --> 00:04:53,871
You could do something
really special with this.

99
00:04:53,937 --> 00:04:55,989
I am. I'm giving it to my grandma.

100
00:04:56,007 --> 00:04:57,597
No, no, no. You can't be serious.

101
00:04:57,722 --> 00:04:59,432
Don't I look serious?

102
00:05:01,659 --> 00:05:05,044
Well, I hope the
surprise is that someone

103
00:05:05,068 --> 00:05:07,233
found my blood pressure pills.

104
00:05:07,532 --> 00:05:09,416
Happy retirement!

105
00:05:12,536 --> 00:05:14,069
Oh, is this for me?

106
00:05:14,111 --> 00:05:16,683
Of course. It's the least we could do.

107
00:05:16,684 --> 00:05:18,711
You are part of the family, Alma.

108
00:05:18,728 --> 00:05:21,269
That's why we all chipped
in and got you a gift.

109
00:05:21,335 --> 00:05:22,469
- Did you?
- I don't remember that.

110
00:05:22,505 --> 00:05:23,841
- I don't have any money.
- I didn't put in no money.

111
00:05:23,877 --> 00:05:25,297
It's heavier than it looks.

112
00:05:25,362 --> 00:05:27,527
Is it a retirement diamond?

113
00:05:27,563 --> 00:05:30,694
I don't know what it is,
but it's definitely not that.

114
00:05:30,718 --> 00:05:32,231
Oh, yeah, well.

115
00:05:32,232 --> 00:05:33,624
It's not, right?

116
00:05:34,017 --> 00:05:37,185
They are olives from the town
in Italy that you grew up in.

117
00:05:37,197 --> 00:05:40,280
Oh, I haven't had
these since I was a kid.

118
00:05:40,310 --> 00:05:41,855
Thank you, Emily.

119
00:05:41,873 --> 00:05:43,817
Of course. But it wasn't just me.

120
00:05:43,824 --> 00:05:45,978
It was a group effort.
We all helped out.

121
00:05:46,103 --> 00:05:49,943
I don't understand. Why did
you do this and not take credit?

122
00:05:49,961 --> 00:05:52,061
It's called caring for other people.

123
00:05:52,419 --> 00:05:54,828
Fine. Don't tell me.

124
00:05:54,876 --> 00:05:57,333
Is this stupid thing still happening?

125
00:05:57,650 --> 00:05:59,875
Oh, ha, there's that Van wit.

126
00:05:59,923 --> 00:06:01,844
Looks like we're moving
on to the roasting part

127
00:06:01,868 --> 00:06:03,362
of the retirement party.

128
00:06:03,363 --> 00:06:05,106
- Get back to work!
- Sorry.

129
00:06:05,112 --> 00:06:07,164
Well, thank you everyone.
And I'll think of you all

130
00:06:07,212 --> 00:06:10,349
working away here when I'm
holding my new grandbaby.

131
00:06:11,142 --> 00:06:16,427
Land dwellers, prepare to
taste the wrath of the sea!

132
00:06:21,549 --> 00:06:22,613
Oh.

133
00:06:23,150 --> 00:06:24,892
Don't worry, everybody. I'm...

134
00:06:25,486 --> 00:06:26,609
I'm fine.

135
00:06:26,734 --> 00:06:28,256
- Oh, whoa!
- Aah!

136
00:06:28,280 --> 00:06:29,689
- Oh!
- Oh, ah!

137
00:06:29,690 --> 00:06:31,399
- Ohh.
- Oh!

138
00:06:38,182 --> 00:06:41,877
Due to the Sea Troll's
transmorphic beam,

139
00:06:42,223 --> 00:06:47,346
mm... Alma's right arm was
turned into a squid tentacle.

140
00:06:47,405 --> 00:06:49,687
Now, because we care for her very much,

141
00:06:49,812 --> 00:06:52,730
the cafeteria has taken
calamari off of the menu.

142
00:06:53,020 --> 00:06:55,637
And we are passing around a card.

143
00:06:55,660 --> 00:06:59,639
Evil spells, buried under
rubble... ah, sea monsters.

144
00:06:59,653 --> 00:07:01,320
"Get Whale Soon."

145
00:07:01,445 --> 00:07:03,546
- Mm.
- Okay, this is BS.

146
00:07:03,570 --> 00:07:05,258
Van used her as a human shield,

147
00:07:05,282 --> 00:07:06,469
and he's just giving her a card.

148
00:07:06,499 --> 00:07:08,444
I hear Alama's gonna have
to spend eight hours a day

149
00:07:08,473 --> 00:07:10,425
with her arm in a salt water aquarium.

150
00:07:10,455 --> 00:07:12,310
We need to do something for her.

151
00:07:12,375 --> 00:07:13,684
Like get her a castle?

152
00:07:13,701 --> 00:07:15,669
No. I was thinking maybe
something a little more.

153
00:07:15,711 --> 00:07:17,685
Oh, like one of those little
divers that makes bubbles?

154
00:07:17,697 --> 00:07:20,336
No, I was thinking of something
a little less aquarium related.

155
00:07:20,341 --> 00:07:22,670
I actually think she
looks sexier with that arm.

156
00:07:22,708 --> 00:07:25,833
She'd be huge in Japan.

157
00:07:26,134 --> 00:07:29,851
Van, I am not leaving this
room until you do right by Alma.

158
00:07:29,889 --> 00:07:31,111
Absolutely!

159
00:07:31,158 --> 00:07:33,686
I want to give her a ton of money.

160
00:07:33,811 --> 00:07:35,725
She's a hero. Did you see

161
00:07:35,753 --> 00:07:38,115
how she flung herself in front of me

162
00:07:38,168 --> 00:07:40,468
to stop the Sea Troll's blast?

163
00:07:40,492 --> 00:07:43,145
Wow, I'm so glad you feel that way.

164
00:07:43,188 --> 00:07:44,666
I'm gonna need verbal confirmation

165
00:07:44,690 --> 00:07:45,984
that that is what you saw.

166
00:07:46,237 --> 00:07:47,277
What?

167
00:07:47,311 --> 00:07:49,110
You do not get to the top
of the corporate ladder

168
00:07:49,124 --> 00:07:50,627
- by getting sued.
- Oh, my God.

169
00:07:50,646 --> 00:07:53,048
So this is just you
protecting your own ass?

170
00:07:53,173 --> 00:07:55,626
Are you wearing a wire?
Legally, you have to tell me.

171
00:07:55,664 --> 00:07:57,096
Okay, you know what?

172
00:07:57,131 --> 00:07:58,611
Just write me a check.

173
00:07:58,612 --> 00:08:00,227
Then you'll keep quiet?

174
00:08:00,597 --> 00:08:04,130
- No, it's for Alma.
- Then she'll keep quiet?

175
00:08:04,752 --> 00:08:07,143
- Sure.
- Well played.

176
00:08:08,926 --> 00:08:11,513
There have been attacks across the city,

177
00:08:11,543 --> 00:08:14,497
as the Sea Troll continues
his destructive search

178
00:08:14,503 --> 00:08:16,195
for Blackbeard's sword.

179
00:08:16,400 --> 00:08:19,204
In unrelated news, the
Natural History Museum

180
00:08:19,234 --> 00:08:22,711
is opening a special exhibit
of pirate treasure this week.

181
00:08:23,064 --> 00:08:25,742
Okay. I was up all night working.

182
00:08:25,806 --> 00:08:29,732
And I turned this into this.

183
00:08:29,743 --> 00:08:33,187
Tada! Streamlined it. Made a
few tweaks. What do you think?

184
00:08:33,193 --> 00:08:36,847
Uh, I think Grandma's gonna lose
this controller in the couch cushions.

185
00:08:36,877 --> 00:08:39,083
That's not for Grandma. I made
you a market-ready prototype

186
00:08:39,089 --> 00:08:42,154
- so you can sell this.
- Hey, hold up. I told you I wasn't interested.

187
00:08:42,346 --> 00:08:44,905
But you could make a fortune. You
can finally get out of this place.

188
00:08:44,923 --> 00:08:46,229
Why would I wanna do that?

189
00:08:46,241 --> 00:08:48,233
Oh, I don't know. So you're
not stuck here for 40 years

190
00:08:48,257 --> 00:08:50,429
with nothing to show for
it but a jar of olives?

191
00:08:50,490 --> 00:08:51,998
Hey, I love olives.

192
00:08:52,212 --> 00:08:55,832
And Teddy, I think you might be
projecting your fears onto me.

193
00:08:55,856 --> 00:08:56,906
There's no projection.

194
00:08:56,911 --> 00:08:59,349
- I've been here the next longest after Alma.
- Really?

195
00:08:59,378 --> 00:09:00,876
Man, you are very well preserved.

196
00:09:00,895 --> 00:09:03,028
- You don't even look like you hit puberty.
- Thank you.

197
00:09:03,071 --> 00:09:05,581
Wait... Ron, I want you to become
rich and famous so you can come back

198
00:09:05,586 --> 00:09:07,724
and get me out of here and
save me from the death olives.

199
00:09:07,771 --> 00:09:09,558
I don't know what that means.

200
00:09:09,742 --> 00:09:11,150
Look, Ron, has it ever occurred to you

201
00:09:11,160 --> 00:09:12,463
that this relentless
contentment that you feel

202
00:09:12,496 --> 00:09:14,921
is really just deep, deep,
deep denial of your dream?

203
00:09:14,922 --> 00:09:17,661
No, I'm gonna have to deny that.

204
00:09:18,391 --> 00:09:20,059
- Whoa.
- See?

205
00:09:20,131 --> 00:09:21,539
Everyone wants something.

206
00:09:21,611 --> 00:09:24,182
I mean, I guess I've always
wanted to climb Everest.

207
00:09:26,258 --> 00:09:28,233
And with this invention,
you can make enough money

208
00:09:28,286 --> 00:09:30,803
to pay for a bunch of people that
look like me to drag you to the top.

209
00:09:30,821 --> 00:09:33,706
Okay. Well, maybe I
have gotten complacent.

210
00:09:33,831 --> 00:09:36,165
You know what? I'm in.

211
00:09:39,179 --> 00:09:41,136
Whoo! Look at those handsome men.

212
00:09:41,155 --> 00:09:43,195
- I can see why your grandma's into you.
- Oh, yeah.

213
00:09:45,145 --> 00:09:48,389
Ooh, where did this treasure
trove of treats come from?

214
00:09:48,413 --> 00:09:51,387
Well, Van wrote a check because
he didn't wanna get sued.

215
00:09:51,441 --> 00:09:54,466
Then I got Wayne Security
to provide matching funds.

216
00:09:54,483 --> 00:09:57,363
I wish I'd been in an emotionally
scarring and horrific accident.

217
00:09:57,382 --> 00:09:58,485
- I know, right?
- Yeah.

218
00:09:58,509 --> 00:10:01,915
Oh, my God! You guys,
you shouldn't have!

219
00:10:01,953 --> 00:10:04,735
Yes, they got you a
"Get Well Alma" banner.

220
00:10:04,764 --> 00:10:06,773
- Oh.
- Oh!

221
00:10:06,898 --> 00:10:10,438
Poor, old, sweet, heroic Alma.

222
00:10:10,481 --> 00:10:12,285
You know, she threw herself
right in front of me.

223
00:10:12,294 --> 00:10:15,558
Yes, you have firmly
established your alibi, sir.

224
00:10:15,587 --> 00:10:18,550
Good. Wow, this is a impressive,

225
00:10:18,588 --> 00:10:19,848
glittering pile of crap.

226
00:10:19,877 --> 00:10:23,143
- Well done, Emily.
- Well, it wasn't just me. It was a team effort.

227
00:10:26,794 --> 00:10:27,994
Oh, my God, there she is.

228
00:10:27,995 --> 00:10:30,152
She smells like day-old fish sticks.

229
00:10:30,181 --> 00:10:32,944
Hey, Alma! Looking good.

230
00:10:32,967 --> 00:10:35,372
Oh I don't know how to thank you guys.

231
00:10:35,497 --> 00:10:37,615
We'd love to get a quick photo.

232
00:10:37,620 --> 00:10:39,777
The Gotham office was very impressed

233
00:10:39,796 --> 00:10:41,662
with this display of generosity.

234
00:10:41,709 --> 00:10:43,584
You're with the Gotham
office. Which floor?

235
00:10:43,670 --> 00:10:45,574
- 96.
- Oh!

236
00:10:45,946 --> 00:10:47,891
That's where the fruit
is cut fresh every day.

237
00:10:47,924 --> 00:10:50,096
Yep, so who's responsible for this?

238
00:10:50,158 --> 00:10:51,752
Well, really, it was team effort.

239
00:10:51,780 --> 00:10:54,949
Yeah, and I am the leader of that team.

240
00:10:54,968 --> 00:10:57,375
I'm Vanderveer Wayne. Nice to meet you.

241
00:10:57,402 --> 00:11:00,824
Generous fella and fruit lover.

242
00:11:00,828 --> 00:11:03,788
- Well, let's get a photo.
- Yes, great!

243
00:11:03,807 --> 00:11:06,052
Let's get it with you.
Now, don't crowd Alma!

244
00:11:06,088 --> 00:11:08,804
For... get out of the...
Please, look at her.

245
00:11:08,836 --> 00:11:11,573
She's malformed. Let's do a handshake.

246
00:11:11,584 --> 00:11:13,756
Oh, okay.

247
00:11:13,774 --> 00:11:16,745
- There we go.
- He just took all the credit

248
00:11:16,769 --> 00:11:18,428
for everything you did.

249
00:11:18,493 --> 00:11:21,100
Even with your "Sound
of Music" upbringing,

250
00:11:21,118 --> 00:11:22,746
that has to bother you.

251
00:11:22,788 --> 00:11:24,488
Look, I didn't do it for the credit.

252
00:11:24,613 --> 00:11:26,963
Look how happy Alma is.
That's why I did this.

253
00:11:26,987 --> 00:11:28,412
- There we are.
- Excuse me.

254
00:11:28,484 --> 00:11:30,166
Is this Wayne Security?

255
00:11:30,237 --> 00:11:32,563
Oh, my God. You're Archibald Stylus.

256
00:11:32,688 --> 00:11:35,003
You owe me a bathrobe.

257
00:11:35,230 --> 00:11:36,882
- Archibald.
- Whoa.

258
00:11:36,924 --> 00:11:38,128
Ah.

259
00:11:38,253 --> 00:11:40,133
This is Vanderveer Wayne.

260
00:11:40,157 --> 00:11:41,803
He's responsible for all of this.

261
00:11:41,826 --> 00:11:44,928
Ah, I was so touched by your amazing

262
00:11:44,940 --> 00:11:47,959
outpouring of generosity
that the Wayne Foundation

263
00:11:48,084 --> 00:11:50,676
is honoring you with
the key to the city.

264
00:11:50,677 --> 00:11:53,333
Well. Do I have to do anything?

265
00:11:53,375 --> 00:11:55,749
Just come to our awards gala.

266
00:11:55,779 --> 00:11:57,706
Ah, maybe let me take you out to lunch.

267
00:11:57,735 --> 00:11:59,221
Yes for the first one.

268
00:11:59,263 --> 00:12:00,920
No to the second one.

269
00:12:00,921 --> 00:12:03,050
Generous and a great sense of humor.

270
00:12:03,051 --> 00:12:05,311
I can see why that woman
took a bullet for you.

271
00:12:05,317 --> 00:12:07,417
And she did so quite willingly.

272
00:12:07,452 --> 00:12:09,892
- Mm.
- Quite willingly.

273
00:12:09,940 --> 00:12:11,377
Yes, of course.

274
00:12:11,419 --> 00:12:13,477
Emily, isn't that your personal hero?

275
00:12:13,536 --> 00:12:16,179
- Yep.
- The man you dream of working for?

276
00:12:16,191 --> 00:12:17,498
- Yes.
- Right here,

277
00:12:17,533 --> 00:12:21,059
showering Van with praise
for something you did?

278
00:12:21,119 --> 00:12:22,556
- Yes.
- Well...

279
00:12:22,908 --> 00:12:24,781
it's a good thing that you
don't care about credit,

280
00:12:24,799 --> 00:12:27,907
because otherwise this
would really bother you.

281
00:12:30,341 --> 00:12:33,055
Hey, did everybody see the newsletter?

282
00:12:33,086 --> 00:12:35,410
I mean, it's silly,
really. It's just a pamphlet

283
00:12:35,434 --> 00:12:38,693
with my face on it that every
person in the company sees.

284
00:12:38,715 --> 00:12:40,585
Yeah, right before they
spit out their gum in it.

285
00:12:40,632 --> 00:12:43,477
Yeah, a lot of very important
people chew gum, Emily.

286
00:12:43,513 --> 00:12:45,004
And they're the key to the fruit floor.

287
00:12:45,022 --> 00:12:46,985
Jackie, I want it framed
and put in the lobby.

288
00:12:47,019 --> 00:12:48,655
I will hang it right next to the picture

289
00:12:48,674 --> 00:12:51,676
of you meeting Vin Diesel
in the Dallas airport, sir.

290
00:12:51,728 --> 00:12:53,828
I'm still surprised that
our similarity of names

291
00:12:53,842 --> 00:12:55,555
didn't lead to more of a conversation.

292
00:12:55,680 --> 00:12:57,149
Ooh, did you see?

293
00:12:57,178 --> 00:12:59,946
I even made the crossword.
Look, ten down, ten down.

294
00:13:00,027 --> 00:13:03,554
"Large multi-person
vehicle." Three letters.

295
00:13:03,587 --> 00:13:06,837
It's bus. "Vanana" is not a fruit.

296
00:13:06,846 --> 00:13:09,585
Oh, Emily, I think you might
have a blood sugar problem.

297
00:13:09,618 --> 00:13:13,355
Jackie, could you get us both
a couple of "vanana" smoothies?

298
00:13:13,379 --> 00:13:16,433
Did it ever occur to you that
a lot of people in this office

299
00:13:16,447 --> 00:13:19,201
chipped in for Alma and maybe
they'd like Corporate to know?

300
00:13:19,263 --> 00:13:21,630
- She's talking about herself.
- Mm.

301
00:13:21,654 --> 00:13:22,896
No, I am not.

302
00:13:22,911 --> 00:13:26,361
I have always said the only
applause a truly good person needs

303
00:13:26,389 --> 00:13:27,983
is the beating of their own heart.

304
00:13:28,012 --> 00:13:30,994
Wow, what an odd thing for
someone to have always said.

305
00:13:31,009 --> 00:13:33,228
Everyone in this office
chipped in. I mean,

306
00:13:33,275 --> 00:13:35,198
Wendy made a basket.

307
00:13:35,255 --> 00:13:36,816
Okay, I think I know
what you little piggies

308
00:13:36,840 --> 00:13:38,253
are rooting around for.

309
00:13:38,286 --> 00:13:41,015
Yes, I can get you a table to the gala.

310
00:13:41,030 --> 00:13:42,991
No, Van. That is not good enough.

311
00:13:43,001 --> 00:13:44,190
Is there free food and booze?

312
00:13:44,191 --> 00:13:47,271
God, I sometimes forget
how poor you people are.

313
00:13:47,295 --> 00:13:49,471
- Yes, there will be.
- Uh!

314
00:13:49,486 --> 00:13:51,273
Okay, I think we have
a little more respect

315
00:13:51,299 --> 00:13:52,263
- for ourselves...
- We're in!

316
00:13:52,272 --> 00:13:55,331
Oink, oink, oink, oink.

317
00:14:01,224 --> 00:14:04,264
Open bar? Sounds like a challenge, mmm.

318
00:14:04,951 --> 00:14:07,008
Who are all the squares
in the VIP section?

319
00:14:07,027 --> 00:14:09,871
Oh, just the greatest
philanthropists in the world.

320
00:14:09,914 --> 00:14:12,713
More like philathro-stiffs.

321
00:14:14,054 --> 00:14:16,985
- Admit it, this is killing you.
- Not at all.

322
00:14:17,008 --> 00:14:19,137
The important thing is, we
helped what's-her-face with the

323
00:14:19,171 --> 00:14:20,893
squid thing.

324
00:14:20,965 --> 00:14:23,130
You just ate a toothpick.

325
00:14:25,483 --> 00:14:28,234
This room is full of the most
successful businessmen in Charm City.

326
00:14:28,235 --> 00:14:29,523
We're gonna pitch them your drone.

327
00:14:29,559 --> 00:14:32,154
Or we can figure out which
door these tiny burgers

328
00:14:32,172 --> 00:14:34,247
are coming from and cut
them off at the pass.

329
00:14:34,707 --> 00:14:37,248
Ron, okay, I know you're nervous.

330
00:14:37,278 --> 00:14:39,460
But I had this dream that
one day I come to work

331
00:14:39,472 --> 00:14:42,057
- and you're not in your cubical.
- Am I in the bathroom?

332
00:14:42,305 --> 00:14:45,230
- No, you just got up and left.
- Oh, no, that seems out of character for me.

333
00:14:45,248 --> 00:14:46,817
Okay, fine. You gave two weeks notice,

334
00:14:46,859 --> 00:14:48,439
we had a cake, it was
emotional, I cried.

335
00:14:48,445 --> 00:14:50,699
Now stop stalling. I
have a perfect opener.

336
00:14:50,729 --> 00:14:51,729
Huh?

337
00:14:54,694 --> 00:14:55,835
Ah.

338
00:14:55,960 --> 00:14:56,943
Excuse me?

339
00:14:56,948 --> 00:15:00,866
Could we have a moment of
your time to pitch you an idea?

340
00:15:00,867 --> 00:15:02,904
- Sure.
- Eh?

341
00:15:03,648 --> 00:15:08,107
So, this drone, it reads your
brain's electrical impulses

342
00:15:08,126 --> 00:15:11,147
so it can sense both
your mood and attitude

343
00:15:11,171 --> 00:15:13,247
uh, to take the perfect selfie,

344
00:15:13,280 --> 00:15:15,838
as it will read my confidence.

345
00:15:15,915 --> 00:15:18,360
Wow. That's amazing.

346
00:15:18,687 --> 00:15:21,946
If that really works, I will
write you a check right now

347
00:15:21,961 --> 00:15:24,179
that will change your entire life.

348
00:15:24,257 --> 00:15:26,236
My entire life? Uh,

349
00:15:26,361 --> 00:15:28,565
that's a lot of my
life to change. I mean,

350
00:15:28,604 --> 00:15:30,546
that must be a very big check.

351
00:15:35,923 --> 00:15:38,553
I'ma just head over to
the tiny burger door.

352
00:15:41,374 --> 00:15:44,622
And now, the Wayne
Foundation's unsung hero,

353
00:15:44,647 --> 00:15:47,385
Mr. Vanderveer Wayne.

354
00:15:48,845 --> 00:15:50,616
Friends and colleagues,

355
00:15:50,888 --> 00:15:54,662
I believe co-workers
should stick together

356
00:15:54,672 --> 00:15:58,198
harder than Alma's
disgusting calamari arm

357
00:15:58,199 --> 00:16:00,546
would wrap around the neck of a seal,

358
00:16:00,575 --> 00:16:02,975
dragging it to the depths to drown it.

359
00:16:03,233 --> 00:16:05,340
Because I care about people.

360
00:16:05,566 --> 00:16:08,867
Can you believe people
are buying this crap?

361
00:16:09,151 --> 00:16:12,553
Now, there's someone who deserves
to share this key with me,

362
00:16:12,601 --> 00:16:16,337
and not just because I found out
it really doesn't open anything.

363
00:16:16,371 --> 00:16:18,161
I mean, nothing! Nothing.

364
00:16:18,695 --> 00:16:19,827
But without her,

365
00:16:20,457 --> 00:16:22,027
none of this would be possible.

366
00:16:22,218 --> 00:16:24,683
Now, she thinks I've
forgotten her, but I haven't.

367
00:16:26,651 --> 00:16:29,013
Why don't you just
come up on stage, here?

368
00:16:29,061 --> 00:16:30,732
Van, that is so sweet,

369
00:16:30,751 --> 00:16:32,549
but I didn't do it for the recognition.

370
00:16:32,592 --> 00:16:34,691
That's great... because

371
00:16:34,763 --> 00:16:36,619
I wasn't talking about you.

372
00:16:36,653 --> 00:16:40,460
Ehh! I was talking about Alma,
the one who saved my life.

373
00:16:40,470 --> 00:16:42,260
Oh, my.

374
00:16:42,435 --> 00:16:43,902
Oh.

375
00:16:43,954 --> 00:16:46,793
Oh, my life!

376
00:16:46,839 --> 00:16:48,916
Whoo! Oh! Oh, sorry sweetie.

377
00:16:48,939 --> 00:16:51,019
Oh, my.

378
00:16:51,216 --> 00:16:53,186
Some people, huh? Am I right?

379
00:16:54,107 --> 00:16:56,088
Don't, you know... listen,

380
00:16:56,365 --> 00:16:59,943
I know you can't clap anymore 'cause
of that disgusting calamari arm,

381
00:16:59,991 --> 00:17:01,804
but I have always said

382
00:17:02,038 --> 00:17:07,187
that the only applause a good person
needs is the sound of the beating

383
00:17:07,526 --> 00:17:09,295
of one's own heart.

384
00:17:09,740 --> 00:17:13,058
Van, that is the most beautiful and

385
00:17:13,064 --> 00:17:15,956
personal description of
giving I've ever heard.

386
00:17:15,957 --> 00:17:18,636
Hey, that is my line! Me!

387
00:17:18,658 --> 00:17:20,573
I did all of this! It was all me!

388
00:17:20,615 --> 00:17:23,251
Okay, that [BLEEP] piece of
[BLEEP] only got off his ass

389
00:17:23,275 --> 00:17:24,639
when he was afraid he'd get sued!

390
00:17:24,653 --> 00:17:27,678
I mean, he used her as
a human [BLEEP] shield!

391
00:17:30,723 --> 00:17:33,685
But really, it's all about Alma, right?

392
00:17:36,823 --> 00:17:38,162
Everyone, take cover!

393
00:17:38,190 --> 00:17:41,193
- It's the Sea Troll!
- Oh, thank God.

394
00:17:41,387 --> 00:17:43,502
- Unbelievable!
- A super villain

395
00:17:43,526 --> 00:17:45,823
attacking the gala at a
natural history museum?

396
00:17:48,935 --> 00:17:50,769
Ah!

397
00:17:51,854 --> 00:17:53,905
Oh... how nice.

398
00:17:54,079 --> 00:17:56,900
Everybody surrender to the Sea Troll.

399
00:17:58,941 --> 00:18:01,118
Come on, hide!

400
00:18:02,705 --> 00:18:05,288
All we want is ***.

401
00:18:05,318 --> 00:18:07,220
And your valuables.

402
00:18:11,443 --> 00:18:15,769
I don't think by valuables they
mean your BFF necklace from Claire's.

403
00:18:15,970 --> 00:18:18,297
I feel really ashamed of my behavior.

404
00:18:18,573 --> 00:18:21,883
I've done far worse. I
once bet my dentist $20

405
00:18:21,884 --> 00:18:24,668
that he didn't have the balls
to shoot a lion on safari.

406
00:18:24,698 --> 00:18:26,517
He did. He did.

407
00:18:26,539 --> 00:18:28,622
Look, if you wanted credit,
you should've just taken it.

408
00:18:28,646 --> 00:18:29,964
No, but that's wrong.

409
00:18:30,011 --> 00:18:32,049
A good person shouldn't need credit.

410
00:18:32,073 --> 00:18:33,361
Oh, my God. Are you serious?

411
00:18:33,389 --> 00:18:35,384
Why do you think that Superman
has that big S on his chest?

412
00:18:35,422 --> 00:18:39,796
Do you think that Batman puts
that bat logo on his boomerangs

413
00:18:39,825 --> 00:18:41,454
'cause it helps them fly? No.

414
00:18:41,455 --> 00:18:43,261
They wanna brand themselves

415
00:18:43,273 --> 00:18:46,381
so that people know who it
is to advance their careers.

416
00:18:46,447 --> 00:18:48,613
Crimson Fox is here to save you.

417
00:18:48,643 --> 00:18:50,540
#Outfoxed.

418
00:18:51,097 --> 00:18:52,364
Case in point.

419
00:18:52,365 --> 00:18:54,071
Look, if you wanna run
the Wayne Foundation,

420
00:18:54,089 --> 00:18:55,427
you had better step into the spotlight.

421
00:18:55,435 --> 00:18:57,698
Do you think that Beyoncé
would be selling our arenas

422
00:18:57,760 --> 00:19:00,933
if she had remained one
of Destiny's Children?

423
00:19:00,940 --> 00:19:02,312
Maybe you're right.

424
00:19:02,703 --> 00:19:05,595
And I don't wanna end up like
what's-her-face or the other one.

425
00:19:05,643 --> 00:19:07,465
Exactly. There you go.

426
00:19:07,489 --> 00:19:11,226
You want credit for the
things you do and that's okay.

427
00:19:11,488 --> 00:19:14,307
I took credit for something
I had nothing to do with.

428
00:19:14,345 --> 00:19:16,488
- That's okay, too.
- No, actually, it's not.

429
00:19:16,489 --> 00:19:19,709
Oh, yeah.

430
00:19:20,193 --> 00:19:22,194
So it has a few glitches, all
right? We'll work on it together

431
00:19:22,224 --> 00:19:23,960
- and we'll get them next time.
- Will you stop it?

432
00:19:23,990 --> 00:19:26,144
Just stop it, Teddy. I lied to you.

433
00:19:26,185 --> 00:19:28,344
I don't wanna climb Everest,
and the drone knew it.

434
00:19:28,416 --> 00:19:29,848
Well, why didn't you just tell me that?

435
00:19:29,973 --> 00:19:32,920
Well, it seemed to make you so
unhappy to think I was happy.

436
00:19:32,950 --> 00:19:35,272
So I pretended to be
unhappy to make you happy

437
00:19:35,296 --> 00:19:38,063
because seeing you happy makes me happy.

438
00:19:38,099 --> 00:19:41,377
Oh, my God. I can't take
it. I'm over here, Sea Troll.

439
00:19:41,413 --> 00:19:44,056
I have your sword. Take me!

440
00:19:44,384 --> 00:19:45,739
I mean, sure,

441
00:19:45,757 --> 00:19:48,411
there's times at work where
I'm frustrated or bored.

442
00:19:48,435 --> 00:19:50,845
I mean, I'm not a
robot. HR tests for that.

443
00:19:50,881 --> 00:19:53,147
- Yeah.
- But I don't mind.

444
00:19:53,499 --> 00:19:55,420
'Cause I get to work with you.

445
00:19:56,396 --> 00:19:57,860
Wow, Ron.

446
00:19:58,130 --> 00:20:01,230
You are such a weirdo. Bring it in.

447
00:20:06,914 --> 00:20:09,975
Kathy, I heard about your hysterectomy.

448
00:20:09,976 --> 00:20:11,871
Congratulations!

449
00:20:12,078 --> 00:20:13,445
Wow.

450
00:20:13,446 --> 00:20:15,693
Van, what was that?

451
00:20:15,747 --> 00:20:17,449
You inspired me.

452
00:20:17,450 --> 00:20:19,946
I realized that they
threw an entire gala for me

453
00:20:19,970 --> 00:20:21,563
because they thought that
I cared about someone.

454
00:20:21,586 --> 00:20:23,292
Can you imagine what I could get

455
00:20:23,328 --> 00:20:25,853
if I pretended to care
about a lot of these people?

456
00:20:25,854 --> 00:20:28,218
- That's... that's not exactly...
- Just take the win.

457
00:20:28,260 --> 00:20:31,522
Hey, Ryan! I love the new perm.

458
00:20:32,119 --> 00:20:35,095
So it seems all that press you
embarrassed yourself in front of

459
00:20:35,125 --> 00:20:37,290
actually caught something else.

460
00:20:38,017 --> 00:20:41,673
"Unsung Hero Saves
Philanthropist Vanderveer Wayne."

461
00:20:41,798 --> 00:20:43,595
Are you gonna tell the paper it was you?

462
00:20:43,631 --> 00:20:44,901
Well, maybe I will.

463
00:20:44,961 --> 00:20:46,929
Doesn't make me a bad
person to want credit.

464
00:20:46,935 --> 00:20:48,410
Oh, hey, Jackie.

465
00:20:48,438 --> 00:20:51,741
Thanks so much for driving me to
the doctor every day last week.

466
00:20:52,084 --> 00:20:53,328
Don't mention it.

467
00:20:53,521 --> 00:20:55,249
Okay, I know you can't hear it,

468
00:20:55,263 --> 00:20:56,857
but my heart is applauding you.

469
00:20:56,914 --> 00:20:58,523
Stop it, or I'll cut it out of you.

470
00:20:58,566 --> 00:21:00,641
- Gimme a hug!
- No.

471
00:21:01,794 --> 00:21:02,904
Oh, come...

472
00:21:04,797 --> 00:21:06,187
Ah.

473
00:21:06,397 --> 00:21:08,110
Ha. That's funny.

474
00:21:08,453 --> 00:21:13,453
- Synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.addic7ed.com -