1 00:00:00,013 --> 00:00:03,548 Synced & corrected by -robtor- www.addic7ed.com 2 00:00:05,241 --> 00:00:06,340 Someone get my phone! 3 00:00:06,442 --> 00:00:07,875 We're not getting your phone. 4 00:00:07,977 --> 00:00:10,544 I know I said not to touch my phone, but touch my phone! 5 00:00:10,646 --> 00:00:11,612 Why can't you get it?! 6 00:00:11,714 --> 00:00:12,646 I'm in the shower! 7 00:00:12,749 --> 00:00:14,415 Come on, it might be important. 8 00:00:14,517 --> 00:00:16,584 It might be one of the people I sent my résumé to! 9 00:00:16,686 --> 00:00:18,252 Then you should definitely get it. 10 00:00:18,354 --> 00:00:20,755 If I get a job, I'll be moving out. 11 00:00:23,893 --> 00:00:26,260 Axl Heck's phone. How may I help you? 12 00:00:26,362 --> 00:00:27,561 And whom may I say is calling? 13 00:00:28,698 --> 00:00:29,563 One moment, please, 14 00:00:29,665 --> 00:00:30,264 Mr. McCollum. 15 00:00:30,366 --> 00:00:31,132 Here, here, here. 16 00:00:31,234 --> 00:00:32,767 Hello, this is Axl Heck. 17 00:00:32,869 --> 00:00:34,402 Business is my business. 18 00:00:34,504 --> 00:00:36,771 Yeah. Oh... 19 00:00:36,873 --> 00:00:38,672 Knock, knock! 20 00:00:38,775 --> 00:00:41,642 Sorry to barge in, but we have big news, and it just couldn't wait! 21 00:00:41,744 --> 00:00:43,644 I'm sorry, we're not interrupting dinner, are we? 22 00:00:43,746 --> 00:00:44,879 No, we're almost done. 23 00:00:44,981 --> 00:00:46,614 Anyway, we didn't know if you saw, 24 00:00:46,716 --> 00:00:47,681 so we thought we'd be 25 00:00:47,784 --> 00:00:48,883 the first ones to tell you. 26 00:00:48,985 --> 00:00:49,884 Orson made the list 27 00:00:49,986 --> 00:00:51,318 of the top 200 28 00:00:51,421 --> 00:00:52,353 most livable cities! 29 00:00:52,455 --> 00:00:53,954 In America? 30 00:00:54,057 --> 00:00:55,222 No, Indiana! 31 00:00:55,324 --> 00:00:56,624 Oh, my God! What number were we ranked? 32 00:00:56,726 --> 00:00:59,360 200. It's the first time we made the list! 33 00:00:59,462 --> 00:01:01,829 It's right here in Distinctly Indiana Magazine. 34 00:01:01,931 --> 00:01:03,731 Looks like we bumped Porterdale 35 00:01:03,833 --> 00:01:05,466 off the list from last year. 36 00:01:05,568 --> 00:01:07,201 You know, they had that big kerfuffle 37 00:01:07,303 --> 00:01:08,102 about the diving board 38 00:01:08,204 --> 00:01:09,414 - at the municipal pool. - Hmm. 39 00:01:09,439 --> 00:01:10,438 Well, I think Orson deserves it. 40 00:01:10,463 --> 00:01:11,349 The people here 41 00:01:11,374 --> 00:01:12,406 are just really friendly. 42 00:01:12,508 --> 00:01:13,774 I think it's dumb. 43 00:01:13,876 --> 00:01:14,819 Not everybody. 44 00:01:14,844 --> 00:01:16,911 The whole thing's just a big money-maker. 45 00:01:17,013 --> 00:01:19,413 They just want the people in those 200 towns 46 00:01:19,515 --> 00:01:21,215 who never buy the magazine to buy the magazine. 47 00:01:21,317 --> 00:01:22,950 I bought four! 48 00:01:23,052 --> 00:01:24,585 Well, it's too late now, 49 00:01:24,687 --> 00:01:26,630 'cause Orson's goin' "200" crazy! 50 00:01:26,655 --> 00:01:28,289 We're gonna incorporate the whole thing 51 00:01:28,391 --> 00:01:30,157 into the cow rededication ceremony... 52 00:01:30,182 --> 00:01:32,080 200 balloons, 200 desserts, 53 00:01:32,105 --> 00:01:34,672 200 coupons of goods and services from local vendors 54 00:01:34,697 --> 00:01:36,330 that will go into a gift basket 55 00:01:36,355 --> 00:01:38,188 to be awarded to the 200th visitor 56 00:01:38,444 --> 00:01:40,511 who crosses the city line that day! 57 00:01:40,536 --> 00:01:43,504 Wait, 200 balloon?! 58 00:01:43,683 --> 00:01:44,916 That's like two bags' worth! 59 00:01:44,941 --> 00:01:46,073 Yeah, it's a big deal. 60 00:01:46,175 --> 00:01:48,275 Can I tell Axl? I wanna tell Axl! 61 00:01:48,377 --> 00:01:50,578 Axl! Axl! 62 00:01:50,680 --> 00:01:52,613 Orson got voted the 200th most livable city... 63 00:01:52,792 --> 00:01:54,225 not in America, but in Indiana... 64 00:01:54,250 --> 00:01:55,182 and there's gonna be a huge celebration 65 00:01:55,284 --> 00:01:56,350 and two bags of balloons! 66 00:01:56,452 --> 00:01:57,251 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 67 00:01:57,353 --> 00:01:58,385 I got bigger news. 68 00:01:58,488 --> 00:02:00,154 Jackson Plumbing Supply liked my résumé, 69 00:02:00,256 --> 00:02:02,744 and they want me to interview with a Human Resources person 70 00:02:02,769 --> 00:02:04,602 - for a position in sales. - Really? 71 00:02:04,627 --> 00:02:07,261 Yeah, they said they're gonna call my assistant tomorrow to set it up. 72 00:02:07,363 --> 00:02:09,797 Your assistant? You don't have a... Ohh! 73 00:02:09,899 --> 00:02:12,733 - Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no! - Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes! 74 00:02:12,835 --> 00:02:14,135 Sue, come on! Please! 75 00:02:14,237 --> 00:02:17,371 Be my assistant, my assistant sister... my assist-erant. 76 00:02:17,473 --> 00:02:19,607 Fine. 77 00:02:19,709 --> 00:02:21,275 But only this once, 78 00:02:21,377 --> 00:02:23,410 and I want to be senior assist-erant. 79 00:02:23,435 --> 00:02:24,355 Done. 80 00:02:24,380 --> 00:02:25,779 Okay. 81 00:02:31,454 --> 00:02:32,453 Hello, Cindy. 82 00:02:32,632 --> 00:02:33,664 It's me... Brick. 83 00:02:33,689 --> 00:02:35,756 I know. I recognize your voice. 84 00:02:35,936 --> 00:02:36,868 And your face. 85 00:02:36,893 --> 00:02:38,192 Listen, you may have heard 86 00:02:38,294 --> 00:02:39,393 I had a little dalliance 87 00:02:39,495 --> 00:02:40,594 with the new girl, Lilah. 88 00:02:40,696 --> 00:02:42,997 Anyway, she got some notes 89 00:02:43,099 --> 00:02:45,566 containing some pretty disturbing threats, 90 00:02:45,668 --> 00:02:48,636 and, well... 91 00:02:48,738 --> 00:02:52,072 might one dare to dream that they were from you? 92 00:02:52,252 --> 00:02:53,217 They were. 93 00:02:53,319 --> 00:02:54,185 Really? 94 00:02:54,210 --> 00:02:55,576 That's great! 95 00:02:55,601 --> 00:02:57,211 I was hoping you still had feelings for me, 96 00:02:57,236 --> 00:02:58,489 'cause I have feelings for you! 97 00:02:58,514 --> 00:03:00,814 My passion does burn bright for you, Brick. 98 00:03:00,917 --> 00:03:02,393 What a relief. 99 00:03:02,418 --> 00:03:04,028 I'm so glad we're back together. 100 00:03:04,053 --> 00:03:05,186 Slow your roll. 101 00:03:05,288 --> 00:03:07,922 Breaking up with me like you did was very cowardly. 102 00:03:08,024 --> 00:03:09,590 So, in order to win me back, 103 00:03:09,692 --> 00:03:11,926 you have to perform three acts of bravery. 104 00:03:13,629 --> 00:03:15,796 "Three acts of bravery"? 105 00:03:15,975 --> 00:03:17,608 Yep, and I have to have them done 106 00:03:17,633 --> 00:03:19,266 by the cow rededication ceremony. 107 00:03:19,368 --> 00:03:21,335 So, I jotted down a few ideas on the bus, 108 00:03:21,360 --> 00:03:22,960 and I want to run 'em by you guys. 109 00:03:23,216 --> 00:03:24,315 Rank them one to five, 110 00:03:24,340 --> 00:03:25,606 with five being the bravest. 111 00:03:25,675 --> 00:03:28,309 Brick, this Frugal Hoosier chicken's on the clock here. 112 00:03:28,454 --> 00:03:30,254 First one... foiling a bank robbery. 113 00:03:30,279 --> 00:03:31,946 Five for bravery, 114 00:03:32,014 --> 00:03:33,814 one for how the hell are you gonna make that happen? 115 00:03:33,883 --> 00:03:36,517 Hmm. Walking through a hail of gunfire like Wonder Woman? 116 00:03:36,586 --> 00:03:38,152 Please don't dress like Wonder Woman. 117 00:03:38,254 --> 00:03:39,787 Holding in my poop all day? 118 00:03:39,932 --> 00:03:40,865 Solid three. 119 00:03:40,890 --> 00:03:42,189 Hmm. 120 00:03:42,291 --> 00:03:44,458 How upset would you be if I set fire to the house 121 00:03:44,527 --> 00:03:46,493 if I was reasonably sure I could put it out? 122 00:03:46,639 --> 00:03:48,406 Could you make it look like an accident? 123 00:03:48,431 --> 00:03:49,930 Mm. 124 00:03:52,880 --> 00:03:54,212 Hey, Mike. Hey. 125 00:03:54,237 --> 00:03:55,780 Hey, did you hear about Orson being 200th 126 00:03:55,805 --> 00:03:57,281 - in the state of Indiana? - Mm. 127 00:03:57,306 --> 00:03:58,372 I think what put 'em over the top 128 00:03:58,474 --> 00:03:59,707 is when Fountains hired that chef 129 00:03:59,775 --> 00:04:01,842 from the Terre Haute Correctional Facility. 130 00:04:01,987 --> 00:04:03,020 That guy's cooking, 131 00:04:03,045 --> 00:04:04,678 you can lock me up, throw away the key. 132 00:04:04,780 --> 00:04:05,713 Huh. 133 00:04:05,859 --> 00:04:07,225 Hey, listen, I wanted to let you know 134 00:04:07,250 --> 00:04:09,337 that Paula's not gonna be at the cow rededication. 135 00:04:09,362 --> 00:04:11,262 Oh. Okay. 136 00:04:11,287 --> 00:04:13,097 Yeah, we kinda hit a little bump. 137 00:04:13,122 --> 00:04:15,219 Well, it was a bigger bump, I guess. 138 00:04:15,244 --> 00:04:17,024 It's, uh... We're... We're separated. 139 00:04:17,126 --> 00:04:19,393 Oh. I'm sorry to hear that. 140 00:04:19,495 --> 00:04:20,894 Yeah. I mean, it's gonna be fine. 141 00:04:21,074 --> 00:04:22,073 Paula and I both wanted it. 142 00:04:22,098 --> 00:04:23,697 She thought I watched too much sports. 143 00:04:23,799 --> 00:04:24,798 And I thought she changed 144 00:04:24,823 --> 00:04:27,017 ever since she started painting landscapes. 145 00:04:28,482 --> 00:04:29,981 Well, seems like you're handling it well. 146 00:04:30,006 --> 00:04:31,138 Yeah, well, I mean, you know, 147 00:04:31,163 --> 00:04:33,096 we're not the f-first people this has happened to. 148 00:04:33,353 --> 00:04:34,285 Yeah. 149 00:04:34,310 --> 00:04:35,928 All right, then. 150 00:04:35,953 --> 00:04:36,934 Yeah. 151 00:04:37,113 --> 00:04:39,446 I'm not gonna lie to you... It's tough, you know? 152 00:04:39,625 --> 00:04:40,524 It's just not the way 153 00:04:40,549 --> 00:04:41,682 you thought your life was gonna go. 154 00:04:41,784 --> 00:04:44,418 You know, a lot of questions ahead. 155 00:04:44,520 --> 00:04:46,954 I mean, wh-what do we do at Christmas? 156 00:04:47,056 --> 00:04:48,885 Oh, God! 157 00:04:53,929 --> 00:04:55,906 Ugh. Okay... boss. 158 00:04:55,907 --> 00:04:57,482 The HR guy at Jackson Plumbing Supply 159 00:04:57,507 --> 00:04:58,306 has your number. 160 00:04:58,375 --> 00:04:59,474 He'll call to FaceTime you. 161 00:04:59,542 --> 00:05:00,708 All you have to do is pick up. 162 00:05:00,810 --> 00:05:02,577 All right? Okay, great. 163 00:05:02,646 --> 00:05:04,189 Here's a list of other people I sent my résumé to, 164 00:05:04,214 --> 00:05:05,423 if you could just follow up with them 165 00:05:05,448 --> 00:05:06,358 and make sure they got it? 166 00:05:06,383 --> 00:05:07,715 Axl, no! 167 00:05:07,817 --> 00:05:10,251 I helped you out once, but I am done. 168 00:05:10,353 --> 00:05:11,419 You're on your own. 169 00:05:11,444 --> 00:05:12,587 Whoa! Hey! Come on, Sue. 170 00:05:12,656 --> 00:05:13,655 Don't you get it? 171 00:05:13,723 --> 00:05:14,956 When they thought I had an assistant, 172 00:05:15,025 --> 00:05:15,857 they set up the meeting. 173 00:05:15,926 --> 00:05:16,758 I mean, think about it. 174 00:05:16,826 --> 00:05:18,026 Who are you gonna call back... 175 00:05:18,094 --> 00:05:20,194 the guy who makes 25 cents over minimum wage at Spudsy's 176 00:05:20,263 --> 00:05:21,562 or the guy who has an assistant? 177 00:05:22,699 --> 00:05:25,033 You make 25 cents over minimum wage? 178 00:05:25,135 --> 00:05:27,001 See? The world's unfair, Sue. 179 00:05:27,070 --> 00:05:28,736 That's why you got to take every advantage you can get. 180 00:05:28,761 --> 00:05:29,727 Axl, no! 181 00:05:29,873 --> 00:05:32,006 I'm sorry, but I'm not lying for you. 182 00:05:32,119 --> 00:05:34,152 At Lexie's lake house, her mom made us daiquiris, 183 00:05:34,177 --> 00:05:35,576 and even though I'm not 21 yet, 184 00:05:35,645 --> 00:05:37,378 I had a little sip and I liked it! 185 00:05:37,447 --> 00:05:39,113 I can't afford to have anything else go against me 186 00:05:39,138 --> 00:05:40,114 in the eyes of the Lord. 187 00:05:40,674 --> 00:05:43,051 Okay, well, think about it this way. 188 00:05:43,119 --> 00:05:44,652 What if, for helping your brother out, 189 00:05:44,677 --> 00:05:45,630 when you get to Heaven, 190 00:05:45,655 --> 00:05:46,988 they give you a sweet angel job. 191 00:05:47,134 --> 00:05:48,533 You mean like taking care of pets 192 00:05:48,558 --> 00:05:49,958 whose owners haven't arrived yet? 193 00:05:50,026 --> 00:05:52,627 Yep, they're gonna let you right in. 194 00:05:52,696 --> 00:05:54,362 That is, if they recognize you without a head. 195 00:05:54,431 --> 00:05:55,730 Ohh! Axl! 196 00:05:55,799 --> 00:05:57,932 I told you to stop making jokes about freezing my head! 197 00:05:57,957 --> 00:05:59,456 I'm sorry. I just can't help myself. 198 00:05:59,602 --> 00:06:02,070 Okay, I'll tell you what. I'll help you out. 199 00:06:02,095 --> 00:06:04,482 But, if I do, you can never make 200 00:06:04,507 --> 00:06:06,841 another head-freezing joke again... ever. 201 00:06:06,910 --> 00:06:09,444 Done, done. I promise. 202 00:06:09,512 --> 00:06:11,846 No more head-freezing jokes for the rest of your life. 203 00:06:11,948 --> 00:06:13,715 Okay. 204 00:06:13,783 --> 00:06:15,850 But once you're dead, all bets are off... and so is your head. 205 00:06:15,919 --> 00:06:17,719 - Axl! - Last one, I promise. 206 00:06:20,747 --> 00:06:22,468 Okay, we got to get serious 207 00:06:22,493 --> 00:06:24,516 about this time-capsule thing. 208 00:06:24,561 --> 00:06:25,704 I mean, they're putting them 209 00:06:25,729 --> 00:06:26,627 in the base of the cow in two days, 210 00:06:26,730 --> 00:06:27,662 and I got nothin'. 211 00:06:27,687 --> 00:06:29,353 Nancy even gave me an extra month, 212 00:06:29,499 --> 00:06:30,465 and I still blew it. 213 00:06:30,533 --> 00:06:31,899 What is the matter with me? 214 00:06:32,423 --> 00:06:35,003 That's not a list we want to attack right before bed. 215 00:06:35,028 --> 00:06:36,761 No, I'm serious. 216 00:06:36,984 --> 00:06:38,483 What is the matter with my brain 217 00:06:38,508 --> 00:06:40,274 that I can't remember anything anymore? 218 00:06:40,299 --> 00:06:41,231 I need to be tested. 219 00:06:42,712 --> 00:06:45,913 Oh, hey. Uh, Bill and Paula are separated. 220 00:06:45,938 --> 00:06:47,504 Wait, what?! 221 00:06:47,650 --> 00:06:48,816 Seriously? 222 00:06:48,918 --> 00:06:50,651 Why did you let me yap on about my brain 223 00:06:50,676 --> 00:06:52,509 when you were sitting on a story like that? 224 00:06:52,655 --> 00:06:54,022 Start talking, mister. 225 00:06:54,090 --> 00:06:56,457 Uh, well, he says they're having problems. 226 00:06:56,526 --> 00:06:59,127 Apparently, she's on him about watching too much sports. 227 00:06:59,229 --> 00:07:00,995 Well, you know what, she's not wrong. 228 00:07:01,097 --> 00:07:02,663 He does watch a lot of sports. 229 00:07:02,732 --> 00:07:04,298 No more than the next guy. 230 00:07:04,367 --> 00:07:06,768 Besides, Paula should appreciate the extra time 231 00:07:06,793 --> 00:07:09,194 to do her little landscape paintings. 232 00:07:09,219 --> 00:07:10,348 Her "little landscape paintings"? 233 00:07:10,373 --> 00:07:11,406 What does that mean? 234 00:07:11,474 --> 00:07:14,976 I'm just saying, maybe she's, uh, distracted 235 00:07:15,045 --> 00:07:16,944 and not attending to his needs. 236 00:07:16,969 --> 00:07:18,289 "Attending to his needs"?! 237 00:07:18,314 --> 00:07:19,814 Where'd you get that from, the '50s? 238 00:07:19,883 --> 00:07:21,282 What, she's not allowed to paint? 239 00:07:21,384 --> 00:07:22,917 Wait, why are we having their fight? 240 00:07:22,942 --> 00:07:24,742 You're right, you're right. 241 00:07:24,854 --> 00:07:26,788 Ugh. But I just feel so bad for them. 242 00:07:26,856 --> 00:07:28,322 Are they getting divorced? 243 00:07:28,391 --> 00:07:29,857 I don't know. You'd have to ask Bill. 244 00:07:29,926 --> 00:07:31,292 Well, why didn't you ask Bill? 245 00:07:31,935 --> 00:07:34,028 He started crying, so I came inside. 246 00:07:34,174 --> 00:07:35,774 Mike! You can't do that. 247 00:07:35,799 --> 00:07:37,565 He obviously sought you out 248 00:07:37,667 --> 00:07:39,033 because he needed your support, 249 00:07:39,058 --> 00:07:40,224 and you just come inside? 250 00:07:40,370 --> 00:07:43,204 Okay, I'm gonna call Paula and see how she's doing, 251 00:07:43,273 --> 00:07:44,806 but you need to reach out again to Bill. 252 00:07:44,908 --> 00:07:45,973 He needs you. 253 00:07:46,076 --> 00:07:47,909 Hearing a lot of sympathy for Bill here. 254 00:07:47,977 --> 00:07:49,510 What about me? 255 00:07:49,612 --> 00:07:51,746 I had a friend cry in front of me today. 256 00:07:54,951 --> 00:07:57,051 So, Brick, realizing he didn't have the legs 257 00:07:57,076 --> 00:07:59,143 to pull off a Wonder Woman costume, 258 00:07:59,322 --> 00:08:02,557 performed what he hoped would be his first act of bravery. 259 00:08:02,659 --> 00:08:04,692 My fair lady, I bring you the mop 260 00:08:04,761 --> 00:08:07,361 of the crabby afternoon janitor. 261 00:08:07,430 --> 00:08:09,781 Good. I needed a mop. 262 00:08:10,600 --> 00:08:11,632 How'd you get it? 263 00:08:11,734 --> 00:08:14,635 Wit, skill, cunning... and $5. 264 00:08:14,737 --> 00:08:16,404 Hmm. 265 00:08:16,473 --> 00:08:18,139 I'll allow it. That's one. 266 00:08:21,478 --> 00:08:23,177 Hey, thanks for having me over. 267 00:08:23,246 --> 00:08:25,746 Yeah, well, I wanted to make sure that you're okay, 268 00:08:26,297 --> 00:08:28,616 'cause we didn't get a chance to finish talking last time, 269 00:08:28,641 --> 00:08:30,974 'cause I had to come in for the... thing. 270 00:08:31,008 --> 00:08:33,308 Yeah. No, I'm good. 271 00:08:33,523 --> 00:08:34,522 I'm good. 272 00:08:34,624 --> 00:08:36,324 - Good. - Yeah. 273 00:08:39,295 --> 00:08:41,496 You know, nights are the hardest. 274 00:08:41,598 --> 00:08:43,364 Paula's been pulling away for quite some time. 275 00:08:43,433 --> 00:08:45,133 You know what a game's good for? 276 00:08:45,201 --> 00:08:48,035 Getting your mind off of things that are bothering you. 277 00:08:49,495 --> 00:08:51,222 You got a good one, Mike. 278 00:08:52,075 --> 00:08:54,575 I mean, Frankie's not like other women, you know? 279 00:08:54,600 --> 00:08:57,267 Every time I come over, she likes to talk. 280 00:08:57,292 --> 00:08:58,658 Hmm. Well, she does like to talk. 281 00:08:58,683 --> 00:09:00,616 Yeah, but not just small talk, you know? 282 00:09:00,917 --> 00:09:02,483 She's... She connects. 283 00:09:02,585 --> 00:09:04,051 She's funny. 284 00:09:04,154 --> 00:09:05,194 She's so funny. 285 00:09:05,219 --> 00:09:06,754 Yeah, she can be pretty funny. 286 00:09:06,856 --> 00:09:09,023 Mm. Totally. 287 00:09:09,125 --> 00:09:11,392 You know, people our age are starting to wind down, 288 00:09:11,461 --> 00:09:12,426 not Frankie. 289 00:09:12,451 --> 00:09:15,263 She's so... full of life. 290 00:09:16,332 --> 00:09:17,865 Yeah, I guess she is. 291 00:09:17,934 --> 00:09:19,867 I just appreciate there's no games. 292 00:09:19,936 --> 00:09:21,903 You know, you know where you stand. 293 00:09:21,971 --> 00:09:23,704 I had to find out my wife was unhappy 294 00:09:23,806 --> 00:09:25,306 from a subpoena server. 295 00:09:25,375 --> 00:09:27,842 That was... not easy. 296 00:09:27,944 --> 00:09:30,478 I mean, Frankie... 297 00:09:32,315 --> 00:09:33,915 Okay, Cindy. 298 00:09:34,017 --> 00:09:36,050 I'm here in front of the Glossners' house. 299 00:09:36,152 --> 00:09:37,952 That's right... the Glossners' house. 300 00:09:38,054 --> 00:09:39,086 Pretty brave, huh? 301 00:09:40,590 --> 00:09:42,223 Oh. That was a leaf. 302 00:09:42,292 --> 00:09:43,891 Anyway, I know you're convinced 303 00:09:43,960 --> 00:09:46,327 that the Glossners stole your backup safari hat, 304 00:09:46,396 --> 00:09:49,697 so I, Brick Heck, am going to get it back. 305 00:09:49,766 --> 00:09:51,666 I-I waited until everyone was out of the house. 306 00:09:51,768 --> 00:09:53,134 It's not breaking and entering, 307 00:09:53,236 --> 00:09:54,202 because, well, 308 00:09:54,270 --> 00:09:56,003 all the windows are already broken. 309 00:09:56,105 --> 00:09:57,438 All right, here we go. 310 00:09:59,943 --> 00:10:00,808 Good boy. 311 00:10:01,878 --> 00:10:02,810 Good boy? 312 00:10:04,714 --> 00:10:07,048 Good boyyyyyyyyy! 313 00:10:10,553 --> 00:10:12,486 I'm sorry I wasn't able to recover your hat. 314 00:10:12,555 --> 00:10:13,654 However, I did sustain 315 00:10:13,756 --> 00:10:15,489 a rather nasty-looking scrape on my arm 316 00:10:15,592 --> 00:10:17,458 that I did not seek medical attention for. 317 00:10:17,527 --> 00:10:19,393 That looks infected. 318 00:10:19,462 --> 00:10:21,996 Okay. That's two. 319 00:10:24,267 --> 00:10:28,069 123, 124... 320 00:10:29,305 --> 00:10:30,605 What are you doing? 321 00:10:30,707 --> 00:10:32,773 Nothing. Just looking at you. 322 00:10:32,875 --> 00:10:34,308 Why? Is there something on my face? 323 00:10:34,410 --> 00:10:36,143 Nope. Just looking. 324 00:10:47,156 --> 00:10:48,289 Seriously, what is with you? 325 00:10:48,358 --> 00:10:49,890 You're like one of those creepy paintings 326 00:10:49,993 --> 00:10:51,325 where the eyes follow you. 327 00:10:51,427 --> 00:10:52,793 It's just... 328 00:10:52,895 --> 00:10:54,695 I realize I'm a lucky man. 329 00:10:54,764 --> 00:10:56,130 I'm lucky to have you. 330 00:10:56,199 --> 00:10:58,733 Okay, now you're being super weird. 331 00:10:58,835 --> 00:10:59,900 What? 332 00:11:00,003 --> 00:11:01,569 Can't I just appreciate you? 333 00:11:01,671 --> 00:11:04,405 Can't I tell you that I think you're... neat? 334 00:11:12,315 --> 00:11:14,015 Sue! 335 00:11:14,117 --> 00:11:15,783 Ow! It's Jackson's Plumbing Supply! 336 00:11:18,421 --> 00:11:19,854 Axl Heck's line. 337 00:11:19,882 --> 00:11:22,416 Hi, this is Vance McCollum from Jackson Plumbing Supply. 338 00:11:22,525 --> 00:11:24,625 I'm looking to speak to Axl Heck. 339 00:11:24,727 --> 00:11:26,252 One moment, please. 340 00:11:28,254 --> 00:11:30,264 Hey, Vance! It's Axl. 341 00:11:30,366 --> 00:11:32,633 Axl, I've got some good news for you. 342 00:11:32,735 --> 00:11:34,568 Gus, the president of the company, 343 00:11:34,611 --> 00:11:37,144 would like you to come in and meet with him in person. 344 00:11:37,169 --> 00:11:40,203 So, we were hoping you could come by tomorrow at 2:00. 345 00:11:40,243 --> 00:11:40,975 Yes! 346 00:11:43,179 --> 00:11:44,712 Sorry. Yes. 347 00:11:44,814 --> 00:11:47,982 Great. We'll see you tomorrow at 2:00, then. 348 00:11:54,791 --> 00:11:56,023 I just wanted to say, 349 00:11:56,125 --> 00:11:57,758 you two, you're great kids, 350 00:11:57,860 --> 00:12:00,261 and I don't say that enough. 351 00:12:06,106 --> 00:12:09,069 And this is for Orson's 200th visitor today. 352 00:12:09,103 --> 00:12:10,969 What a great gift basket, right Deb? 353 00:12:11,071 --> 00:12:12,871 Such a great gift basket, Court. 354 00:12:12,973 --> 00:12:14,807 So, what's in it? 355 00:12:14,875 --> 00:12:17,042 Well, we've got a happy hour coupon 356 00:12:17,111 --> 00:12:18,877 from T.J. Schnauzer's, 357 00:12:18,946 --> 00:12:21,613 a free cleaning from Smile Superstars... 358 00:12:21,682 --> 00:12:22,748 upper teeth only. 359 00:12:22,817 --> 00:12:25,517 Ooh, and don't forget the free toddler cheer class 360 00:12:25,586 --> 00:12:28,520 from mine and Deb's new store, Sis-Boom-Buy! 361 00:12:28,589 --> 00:12:31,423 We sell tiny cheer outfits for babies, 362 00:12:31,492 --> 00:12:33,192 because the sooner you start them cheering, 363 00:12:33,260 --> 00:12:35,060 the better chance they have of making varsity! 364 00:12:35,162 --> 00:12:36,462 Yeah! 365 00:12:36,564 --> 00:12:38,730 Now let's check in with Ron Donahue 366 00:12:38,799 --> 00:12:41,433 and see how close we are to finding a winner. 367 00:12:41,535 --> 00:12:43,068 Where are we at, Ron? 368 00:12:43,170 --> 00:12:45,838 177! 369 00:12:45,906 --> 00:12:48,040 It was a Kentucky license plate, you guys. 370 00:12:48,142 --> 00:12:49,741 That's exciting! 371 00:12:49,810 --> 00:12:51,376 But it's... it's a real job. 372 00:12:51,479 --> 00:12:53,245 I'd get to use my degree, so... 373 00:12:54,381 --> 00:12:55,481 You know, if they hire me, 374 00:12:55,549 --> 00:12:56,882 I might actually have to learn how to tie one of these. 375 00:12:57,918 --> 00:12:59,651 Okay, we're here. 376 00:12:59,720 --> 00:13:00,853 Thanks for dropping me off. 377 00:13:00,955 --> 00:13:01,854 They think I have an assistant, 378 00:13:01,956 --> 00:13:03,188 so if I showed up in a Winnebago, 379 00:13:03,213 --> 00:13:04,266 that might be a bit of a red flag. 380 00:13:05,292 --> 00:13:07,292 Well, go get 'em. 381 00:13:08,562 --> 00:13:09,595 That's the building, Axl. 382 00:13:09,697 --> 00:13:11,029 - Yep. - So go in. 383 00:13:11,131 --> 00:13:12,231 - I can't. - What? 384 00:13:12,299 --> 00:13:13,499 I can't. I'm freaking out, Sue. 385 00:13:13,567 --> 00:13:14,967 - I can't do it. - Sure, you can. 386 00:13:15,035 --> 00:13:16,802 Nope, mnh-mnh. No, no, I'm not doing it. 387 00:13:16,827 --> 00:13:17,713 I'm not getting out. 388 00:13:17,738 --> 00:13:18,604 If they want to interview me, 389 00:13:18,706 --> 00:13:19,738 they can come out here to the car. 390 00:13:19,840 --> 00:13:21,740 Okay, Axl. 391 00:13:21,842 --> 00:13:22,741 You listen to me. 392 00:13:22,810 --> 00:13:23,976 You are on the edge 393 00:13:24,001 --> 00:13:26,168 of your first step into adulthood. 394 00:13:26,313 --> 00:13:28,280 If you don't go into that building right now, 395 00:13:28,349 --> 00:13:30,015 you'll regret it for the rest of your life! 396 00:13:30,117 --> 00:13:32,017 - Tell it my legs. - Get out! 397 00:13:32,086 --> 00:13:33,185 - No! - Go! 398 00:13:33,254 --> 00:13:34,786 No! And if I don't get out, I can't not get it! 399 00:13:34,855 --> 00:13:36,255 - I'm not letting you do this, Axl. - No! 400 00:13:36,280 --> 00:13:37,312 I am not letting you blow this! 401 00:13:37,491 --> 00:13:38,423 I can't! 402 00:13:38,526 --> 00:13:39,591 I can't! 403 00:13:39,660 --> 00:13:41,760 Sue, come on! Please, no! 404 00:13:41,862 --> 00:13:44,062 You are going in there, and you are getting that job! 405 00:13:44,164 --> 00:13:45,364 I miss my old hair, Sue. 406 00:13:45,432 --> 00:13:46,899 My neck feels cold. It's weird. 407 00:13:47,001 --> 00:13:48,033 Come on! Come on! 408 00:13:48,135 --> 00:13:49,968 Oh, this is very insubordinate behavior! 409 00:13:50,037 --> 00:13:51,003 I'm your boss, for God's sake! 410 00:13:54,542 --> 00:13:55,574 No, you don't! 411 00:13:57,077 --> 00:13:59,111 Hi. Axl Heck. So nice to meet you. 412 00:13:59,136 --> 00:14:01,436 I'm here for my 2:00 appointment. 413 00:14:01,615 --> 00:14:03,015 So, while Sue may not have wanted 414 00:14:03,117 --> 00:14:05,317 to be his "official" assistant, 415 00:14:05,419 --> 00:14:09,621 she was there for Axl when he needed assistance the most. 416 00:14:13,470 --> 00:14:14,429 Okay. 417 00:14:14,498 --> 00:14:15,463 We're just minutes away 418 00:14:15,532 --> 00:14:17,032 from the big unveiling. 419 00:14:17,134 --> 00:14:19,301 We've sealed every family's time capsule 420 00:14:19,403 --> 00:14:20,669 in the base of the cow. 421 00:14:20,737 --> 00:14:23,705 But, first, let's check back in on our visitor count. 422 00:14:23,774 --> 00:14:27,309 You know him, you love him... I know I do. 423 00:14:27,377 --> 00:14:29,644 Ron Donahue! Ron! 424 00:14:30,881 --> 00:14:33,248 183! 425 00:14:34,318 --> 00:14:36,785 This is thrilling, isn't it, folks? 426 00:14:36,887 --> 00:14:39,988 Mike, I forgot to do the time capsule again. 427 00:14:40,057 --> 00:14:41,790 Why can't I remember stuff anymore? 428 00:14:41,858 --> 00:14:43,024 I'm such an idiot. 429 00:14:43,093 --> 00:14:44,926 No, you're not. You're wonderful. 430 00:14:44,995 --> 00:14:47,128 Okay, seriously, you're scaring me. 431 00:14:47,230 --> 00:14:48,513 Hey! 432 00:14:48,542 --> 00:14:49,408 Hey, how'd it go? 433 00:14:49,433 --> 00:14:50,833 Yeah, yeah, what do you think? 434 00:14:50,886 --> 00:14:51,793 What's your feeling? 435 00:14:51,862 --> 00:14:53,320 I'm feeling like I got it. 436 00:14:53,389 --> 00:14:55,289 Wait. You feel like you got it, 437 00:14:55,358 --> 00:14:56,223 or you got it? 438 00:14:56,292 --> 00:14:57,658 No, I got it! I got the job! 439 00:14:57,760 --> 00:14:59,093 - Oh! That's great! - Hey. 440 00:14:59,195 --> 00:15:00,527 - Yeah. - Aww. 441 00:15:00,630 --> 00:15:02,630 Axl just needed a little push. 442 00:15:02,698 --> 00:15:05,266 Eh. You are looking at Jackson Plumbing Supply's 443 00:15:05,291 --> 00:15:07,792 newest junior sales rep for the tri-state area. 444 00:15:07,937 --> 00:15:08,969 Ooh! Which states? 445 00:15:09,038 --> 00:15:11,071 I don't know, but there's tri of them. 446 00:15:15,845 --> 00:15:18,479 Cindy, I'm sorry. I choked. 447 00:15:18,547 --> 00:15:20,314 I couldn't come up with a third act of bravery, 448 00:15:20,339 --> 00:15:21,950 so I guess I blew it. 449 00:15:21,984 --> 00:15:23,817 Again. 450 00:15:23,886 --> 00:15:26,253 I never should have broken up with you in the first place. 451 00:15:26,322 --> 00:15:27,888 It's the dumbest thing I've ever done. 452 00:15:28,536 --> 00:15:30,024 Three. 453 00:15:30,126 --> 00:15:31,025 What? 454 00:15:31,093 --> 00:15:32,793 That's the third act of bravery. 455 00:15:32,862 --> 00:15:35,062 It takes a brave man to admit he was wrong. 456 00:15:35,131 --> 00:15:36,563 That's all I was looking for. 457 00:15:36,878 --> 00:15:38,232 Really? 458 00:15:38,334 --> 00:15:40,200 Wait, so this is it? 459 00:15:40,269 --> 00:15:41,935 We're really back together as a couple? 460 00:15:42,038 --> 00:15:43,270 Yes. 461 00:15:43,372 --> 00:15:45,272 So... should we kiss? 462 00:15:45,341 --> 00:15:46,540 Sure. 463 00:15:50,713 --> 00:15:51,578 Okay, I'll see you around. 464 00:15:51,681 --> 00:15:52,746 All right. 465 00:15:54,884 --> 00:15:56,950 Attention, Orsonites! 466 00:15:57,019 --> 00:15:58,752 We're lucky to have one of our own here 467 00:15:58,854 --> 00:16:00,788 to express what this town means to us. 468 00:16:00,856 --> 00:16:02,222 He's the one that paid 469 00:16:02,291 --> 00:16:05,059 for the refurbishment of our beloved cow. 470 00:16:05,161 --> 00:16:07,207 He's been elected mayor three times, 471 00:16:07,308 --> 00:16:10,994 *** 472 00:16:15,104 --> 00:16:16,870 Look at this crowd size! 473 00:16:16,972 --> 00:16:18,872 Ha! Ha! What a turnout! 474 00:16:18,941 --> 00:16:23,410 Well, let me tell you what I love about Orson, Indiana. 475 00:16:23,512 --> 00:16:25,579 It's a wonderful place... 476 00:16:25,648 --> 00:16:27,147 to buy a car. 477 00:16:27,216 --> 00:16:29,950 In fact, we've got a special all weekend... 478 00:16:30,019 --> 00:16:32,286 buy a car at twice the price, 479 00:16:32,355 --> 00:16:34,555 and get the second half off. 480 00:16:34,657 --> 00:16:37,891 Okay, let's get this thing done and go home. 481 00:16:37,960 --> 00:16:41,729 And now, I give you the new and improved... 482 00:16:41,831 --> 00:16:43,197 Orson Cow. 483 00:16:46,936 --> 00:16:49,536 So come on down to Ehlert Motors. 484 00:16:49,638 --> 00:16:50,722 Free coffee! 485 00:16:50,753 --> 00:16:53,040 Just leave a dollar in the cup, hmm? 486 00:16:55,911 --> 00:16:59,680 Um, o-o-okay, well, if anybody else wanted 487 00:16:59,749 --> 00:17:02,015 to talk about our town or... 488 00:17:02,118 --> 00:17:03,517 I'll do it. 489 00:17:08,224 --> 00:17:09,123 Hi. Mike Heck. 490 00:17:09,225 --> 00:17:10,357 Uh, born and raised in Orson. 491 00:17:10,426 --> 00:17:11,892 Uh, listen, when I first heard 492 00:17:11,994 --> 00:17:14,795 about this whole, um, 200th thing, 493 00:17:14,897 --> 00:17:16,563 I thought it was dumb. 494 00:17:16,632 --> 00:17:19,500 But the more I thought about it... 495 00:17:19,568 --> 00:17:21,869 the more I thought about it... 496 00:17:21,981 --> 00:17:24,048 I started to think maybe it isn't such a bad idea. 497 00:17:24,073 --> 00:17:27,207 'Cause this town deserves to be noticed. 498 00:17:27,232 --> 00:17:30,300 But not by some magazine, by us. 499 00:17:30,490 --> 00:17:32,089 Now, I'm a guy who gets up 500 00:17:32,114 --> 00:17:33,180 and puts on the same thing every day... 501 00:17:33,205 --> 00:17:34,705 a plaid shirt and jeans... 502 00:17:34,730 --> 00:17:36,697 just so I don't have to think about it. 503 00:17:36,886 --> 00:17:40,254 And we all do that... we get up, we go to work, we make dinner, 504 00:17:40,279 --> 00:17:43,113 put the kids to bed, and we forget... 505 00:17:43,259 --> 00:17:46,193 how lucky we are, how fortunate we are 506 00:17:46,295 --> 00:17:48,529 to live in a town where, 507 00:17:48,597 --> 00:17:52,266 uh, Maricela stands out in front of her store with a plate, 508 00:17:52,368 --> 00:17:54,201 asking if you want to try a butter cookie. 509 00:17:54,270 --> 00:17:56,703 Or... Or... Or Joe at the stereo store... 510 00:17:56,772 --> 00:17:59,006 Well, that's what they called it when I was growing up. 511 00:17:59,604 --> 00:18:01,642 You go in there, he always says hi, 512 00:18:01,710 --> 00:18:04,311 you ask him how his day's going, he always says, "Great." 513 00:18:04,380 --> 00:18:05,946 Or how 'bout Lee? 514 00:18:06,015 --> 00:18:09,750 She's the... She's the heart and soul of this town. 515 00:18:09,819 --> 00:18:12,085 I think she was here when it was founded. 516 00:18:14,285 --> 00:18:17,124 And Bill... When my roof was leaking, 517 00:18:17,226 --> 00:18:18,492 Bill came over and helped me patch it, 518 00:18:18,561 --> 00:18:20,227 and he left his hammer at my house. 519 00:18:20,329 --> 00:18:21,439 So I returned it to him, 520 00:18:21,464 --> 00:18:23,430 but he said, "It's not even my hammer." 521 00:18:23,499 --> 00:18:25,232 Somebody else had left it at his house 522 00:18:25,301 --> 00:18:27,100 when we were all there fixing the fence. 523 00:18:27,673 --> 00:18:29,736 So, that's why, yesterday, 524 00:18:29,761 --> 00:18:33,888 I put that hammer in our family's time capsule. 525 00:18:34,577 --> 00:18:35,943 'Cause I think people in the future should know 526 00:18:35,968 --> 00:18:39,143 that this is a town where people help each other out. 527 00:18:39,982 --> 00:18:43,940 'Cause you do for family. 528 00:18:45,020 --> 00:18:46,787 And that's what we are. 529 00:18:48,624 --> 00:18:50,757 So, you know, uh, 530 00:18:50,826 --> 00:18:53,694 we're... we're, uh... we're lucky. 531 00:18:53,719 --> 00:18:55,585 We're really lucky. 532 00:18:55,731 --> 00:18:57,865 Uh... okay. 533 00:18:57,933 --> 00:18:58,999 I guess that's all I got. 534 00:19:02,972 --> 00:19:04,404 All right, Mike. 535 00:19:04,473 --> 00:19:06,206 This is not a drill! 536 00:19:06,308 --> 00:19:08,775 Car 200 is approaching! 537 00:19:11,547 --> 00:19:13,914 Stop! Stop! This is for you! 538 00:19:14,016 --> 00:19:15,649 Welcome to Orson! 539 00:19:15,751 --> 00:19:17,184 You're our 200th visitor... 540 00:19:20,189 --> 00:19:23,056 - Honey! Oh, my God! - You okay? 541 00:19:23,158 --> 00:19:24,291 - You all right? - Oh, sweetie! 542 00:19:24,360 --> 00:19:26,460 Don't worry. Turned out Ron was okay. 543 00:19:26,562 --> 00:19:29,730 The Orson's Best gift basket cushioned the blow. 544 00:19:29,798 --> 00:19:32,799 And the point is, we were all there for him. 545 00:19:38,207 --> 00:19:41,508 I still can't get over what an amazing speech that was. 546 00:19:41,577 --> 00:19:43,210 Who knew you had it in you? 547 00:19:43,312 --> 00:19:44,878 See, you should talk more. 548 00:19:44,947 --> 00:19:47,014 Every so often, I have something to say, 549 00:19:47,082 --> 00:19:48,649 and I say it. 550 00:19:48,717 --> 00:19:51,351 Yeah, I kinda noticed that you've been really loving 551 00:19:51,420 --> 00:19:53,086 towards me and the kids lately. 552 00:19:53,188 --> 00:19:54,388 Disturbingly loving. 553 00:19:54,456 --> 00:19:55,322 I don't know, 554 00:19:55,424 --> 00:19:57,524 I think the Bill and Paula thing 555 00:19:57,593 --> 00:19:59,159 sorta shook me up. 556 00:19:59,228 --> 00:20:02,162 Me, too. Who'd have thought? 557 00:20:02,231 --> 00:20:05,332 God, I guess we're lucky we found each other. 558 00:20:05,434 --> 00:20:09,303 We're soulmates, right? One in a million. 559 00:20:09,405 --> 00:20:11,605 I don't know about that. 560 00:20:11,707 --> 00:20:12,806 What? 561 00:20:12,908 --> 00:20:14,541 I mean, I'm glad it worked out, 562 00:20:14,643 --> 00:20:15,842 but if I hadn't met you, 563 00:20:15,945 --> 00:20:17,578 I'm sure I would've found someone. 564 00:20:17,680 --> 00:20:18,579 Mike! 565 00:20:18,681 --> 00:20:19,580 What? 566 00:20:19,682 --> 00:20:20,881 There's millions of people in the world. 567 00:20:20,983 --> 00:20:22,215 Are you saying I wouldn't have found one? 568 00:20:22,318 --> 00:20:23,450 I'm not hideous. 569 00:20:23,552 --> 00:20:26,286 Yes, and then you wouldn't have our kids. 570 00:20:26,388 --> 00:20:28,722 Yeah, but I would have other kids that I loved. 571 00:20:28,824 --> 00:20:30,057 I would love whatever kids I had. 572 00:20:30,159 --> 00:20:31,992 I can't believe you. 573 00:20:32,094 --> 00:20:33,260 Even this whole town thing. 574 00:20:33,329 --> 00:20:35,228 I mean, yeah, Orson's great and all, 575 00:20:35,297 --> 00:20:36,430 but if I had lived somewhere else, 576 00:20:36,532 --> 00:20:38,098 I'm sure I would've found a lot of things to like 577 00:20:38,123 --> 00:20:39,656 about that place, too. 578 00:20:39,835 --> 00:20:42,169 There's hundreds of thousands of towns across America. 579 00:20:42,271 --> 00:20:43,370 It's a big place, Frankie. 580 00:20:45,218 --> 00:20:46,401 Aww. 581 00:20:47,753 --> 00:20:52,773 Synced & corrected by -robtor- www.addic7ed.com