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Good morning, Seattle, and welcome

2
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to Old Town's 17th annual Wiener Parade!

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We've got food trucks.

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We've got marching bands.

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And of course...

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The Wiener Queen.

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At 17 years old,

8
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Her Majesty is the longest living wiener

9
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in Washington's history.

10
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I don't like one bit of this.
Something feels off.

11
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You just say that every time
we experience whimsy.

12
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No, a parade is no place for whimsy.

13
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Whimsy is for college
improv teams before they all

14
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have sex with each other,
ruining the dynamic.

15
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Teams, this is Ace.
I got a pocket Queen.

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Check in. Is everything copacetic?

17
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No. It's your worst nightmare, Frank.

18
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People are having fun.

19
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Yeah. Everything's cool.

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It's all that and a bag of chips.

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You got any salt and vinnies?

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Put your hands together

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for the Memorial High School
marching band,

24
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the Fighting Badgers!

25
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For the love of God, no.

26
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Dachshunds hunt badgers.
It's in their DNA.

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Along with short legs and back problems.

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Take your head off!

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Show 'em you're a man!

30
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Take your head off!

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Stay calm!

32
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I said stay calm!

33
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Where are you?

34
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I lost the queen.

35
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She's old and blind,
she doesn't stand a chance.

36
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I've got eyes on the queen.

37
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Unfortunately, she's in
the middle of a sausage party

38
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and we're all invited.

39
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I saved the Queen!

40
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I mean, it's a dog, but still.

41
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Dressed like a queen!

42
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It's peeing all over me.

43
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Who's excited for
the Animal Control Officer

44
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of the Year award weekend in Bellingham?

45
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Are you gonna be like this for
the entire two-hour bus ride?

46
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Well, I for one am jazzed,

47
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because two of our ACOOTY
nominees hail from

48
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our very own precinct.

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We have Frank Shaw.

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Yeah! Whoo!

51
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And Templeton Dudge.

52
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Future winners get to board
the bus first.

53
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Let's bring home that hardware T-rophy!

54
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You know, there's a world where

55
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Templeton's compression socks
cut the blood off to his heart,

56
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and I win by default.

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Frank, I'm really excited
to watch you glad-hand

58
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on the campaign trail,
but I do have one note.

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Too handsome? Yeah, it's a curse

60
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I've had to deal with most of my life

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since a very successful puberty.

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We need to talk handshakes.

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You come from a time when
it was fun to squeeze hard,

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but that's not where we're at now.

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Yeah. See that? That's crazy.

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I need you to win the Golden Moose

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so that Templeton doesn't.

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'Cause I know him, and he's
gonna try and leverage a win

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to take over the precinct.

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So, no pressure, but I need you
at your most charming

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and least offensive.

72
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Well, it's tricky because people
find my offensiveness charming.

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If he takes over,

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I mean, it's gonna be a nuclear winter.

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Forced overtimes, creepy
one-on-one performance reviews

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and say goodbye to riddle of the day.

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Uh, riddle of the day
is the first thing to go.

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After that, we're going
gender-specific uniforms.

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Girls in skirts.

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Boys in shorts.

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Terrifying.

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Are you leaving for good?

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Supplies for my annual cocktail party!

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We had a huge crowd for
Speakeasy Fo-Sheezy last year.

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This year's theme is Freaky Tiki.

86
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I don't know what to expect.

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I'm loving ACOOTY Patel, man.

88
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48 hours away from the family.
So full of life.

89
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It's a little glimpse
of what coulda been, brother.

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Okay, no flaming cocktails,
though, 'cause after the fire

91
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that Victoria started last year,

92
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we're kind of
on thin ice with the venue.

93
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Um, you neglect to mention me
saving all of our co-workers

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by pulling the fire alarm,
all without spilling

95
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my margarita el fuego.

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Thanks to you, I spent the evening

97
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shivering on the sidewalk.

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Yeah, because you ripped your shirt off

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as you were running down the hallway.

100
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That was for speed.

101
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Look, I'm sure it was
an accident... sort of.

102
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But, you know you're banned
from the hotel, right?

103
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No, no, no, I'm banned from
booking a room at the hotel.

104
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That doesn't mean that I can't
find someone to crash with.

105
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And this is like the horniest
animal control weekend

106
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of the year, I'm sure someone
will take in a stray.

107
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Alright, let's get everyone on the bus.

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_

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Welcome, everybody.

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I'm Wayne Peters and
I'm running this year's ACOOTYs.

111
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Quick administrative housekeeping note.

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Uh, I've noticed a few officers
walking around in these

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"What Happens in Bellingham" t-shirts.

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This is a work event.

115
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And we do not want
a repeat of last year.

116
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No, we do not, you.

117
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Because what happens in Bellingham

118
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can wind up on your professional record.

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Okay, let's go get 'em!

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In the meantime, cocktails and so forth.

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Enjoy yourselves.

122
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Hey. So, I haven't checked in yet.

123
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Should we try to get conjoining rooms?

124
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What? No, of course not.

125
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Didn't you hear what Wayne said?

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This is still work.

127
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Wait, so everybody's gonna
hook up with a co-worker here

128
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- except for us?
- Exactly.

129
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It's Morgan from Oregon.

130
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Oh, I barely recognize you
with that pretty dress.

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Get outta here, girl.

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Jerry! Hey.

133
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Congrats on the empty nest, brother.

134
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My kids are doing great, though.

135
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I got one in travel soccer,
the other one's doing debate.

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Wait, why am I talking about
my kids at a party?

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Next thing you know,
I'll be trying to show you

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pictures of my baby eatin' with a fork.

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It is pretty cute, though.

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Hey.

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Cheers to last year's ACOOTY winner.

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Did they put you up in the penthouse?

143
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No, just a garden unit.

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Mmm. Tell me more about this unit.

145
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It's pretty nice.

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It's got one of those
retractable clotheslines

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in the shower and everything.

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My clothes get so wet.

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Man, he looks confident.

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I was a nervous wreck
this time last year,

151
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and I didn't even
have to write a speech.

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Wait, Frank has to give a speech?

153
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Yeah.

154
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Can I talk to you out here for a second?

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Okay, everybody here is
going nuts on each other.

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On the walk over, every other door had

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a Do Not Disturb sign on.

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Just try not to think about it,
you know?

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Enjoy the party.

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Okay, yeah. This is rough.

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- He is really gettin' in there.
- Yeah.

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You can count on the guy that
rescued 24 animals in 24 hours.

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Hey, um...

164
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did you know that you have to
make a speech tomorrow night?

165
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Yeah. Acceptance.

166
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No, this is a speech about what being

167
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an animal control officer means to you,

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and it's a new thing this year.

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Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait.
You have to give a speech

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- and you didn't know about it?
- Guys...

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I know that I have to give a speech.

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- Now...
- Okay.

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If you'll excuse me.

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Whew.

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Are you, uh, enjoying the party?

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Damn it. If you'll excuse me.

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Okay.

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Yoo-hoo!

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Hello! Erin, do you mind if I
just jump in here real quick?

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Oh, this is like prom all over again.

181
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But don't take my word for it.

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Take mine.

183
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Confirming you can still see
the teleprompter with the video?

184
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I don't need it, I memorized
this three weeks ago.

185
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I have a photographic memory.

186
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That's why women
don't change in front of me.

187
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Yeah, that's one of the reasons why.

188
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You kept the speech requirement from me?

189
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I did.

190
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When I took over your desk,

191
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I started intercepting your emails.

192
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Oh, your dentist says
happy birthday, by the way.

193
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I lost a molar because I didn't
get that appointment reminder.

194
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I don't think you're
gonna be smiling anyway,

195
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sputtering improvised
sentence fragments in front of

196
00:07:03,881 --> 00:07:06,496
a full room of your very
judgmental peers.

197
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Now, if you'll excuse me,
I have a fitting,

198
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because you just ruined
my rehearsal. We're done.

199
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The two-three is comin' for you.

200
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Are you afraid?

201
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Because you should be.

202
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No, I'm not afraid.

203
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Just... hey! Stop it.

204
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Stop!

205
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Stop!

206
00:07:31,870 --> 00:07:32,770
- Hi.
- Oh!

207
00:07:32,839 --> 00:07:35,812
If it isn't the almost
arsonist of Bellingham.

208
00:07:36,145 --> 00:07:38,483
Oh, I can't talk right now.

209
00:07:38,517 --> 00:07:40,162
I'm writing the speech.

210
00:07:40,186 --> 00:07:41,231
I just hit a flow state.

211
00:07:41,255 --> 00:07:43,870
Ooh, let's see what's
flowed out of you so far.

212
00:07:43,894 --> 00:07:45,840
Well, the faucet's not fully cranked.

213
00:07:45,864 --> 00:07:47,969
What does job mean to Frank?

214
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Templeton really screwed you over.

215
00:07:50,073 --> 00:07:52,087
You might as well do your go-to
and rip your shirt off,

216
00:07:52,111 --> 00:07:54,123
'cause you're not gonna
win people over with this.

217
00:07:54,147 --> 00:07:56,554
I just started. An hour ago.

218
00:07:56,587 --> 00:07:57,665
I'll tell you what.

219
00:07:57,689 --> 00:08:00,336
I'll help you with your speech.
You let me crash here.

220
00:08:00,360 --> 00:08:03,042
So, your alley cat in heat
strategy didn't work on anyone?

221
00:08:03,066 --> 00:08:05,112
You know what? I think
I've underestimated

222
00:08:05,136 --> 00:08:06,615
the emotional trauma

223
00:08:06,639 --> 00:08:08,687
escaping a burning building
leaves on people.

224
00:08:08,711 --> 00:08:10,857
And I bought these to sweeten the deal.

225
00:08:10,881 --> 00:08:12,718
Screw tops. Way to go.

226
00:08:14,055 --> 00:08:15,056
Hey.

227
00:08:17,595 --> 00:08:18,940
Thanks for meeting me here.

228
00:08:18,964 --> 00:08:21,637
I know it's not the honeymoon suite,

229
00:08:21,670 --> 00:08:23,807
but, you know, it's ours.

230
00:08:25,911 --> 00:08:26,811
Okay...

231
00:08:26,980 --> 00:08:30,052
Why are you kissing me
like I'm your grandmother?

232
00:08:30,587 --> 00:08:31,790
Okay, I know...

233
00:08:31,823 --> 00:08:33,560
this whole thing is hard.

234
00:08:33,593 --> 00:08:34,553
Yeah. It is.

235
00:08:34,796 --> 00:08:37,177
You won't come to my room,
but we have to meet in, like,

236
00:08:37,201 --> 00:08:38,981
the coldest place in the hotel.

237
00:08:39,005 --> 00:08:40,717
You know I hate it, too,
but there's nothing

238
00:08:40,741 --> 00:08:41,886
we can really do about it, so...

239
00:08:41,910 --> 00:08:42,922
Yeah, but there is, though.

240
00:08:42,946 --> 00:08:45,560
You said we could
tell people two months ago,

241
00:08:45,584 --> 00:08:46,495
and it's been four months.

242
00:08:46,519 --> 00:08:48,132
Okay, well, the two month thing was just

243
00:08:48,156 --> 00:08:49,225
kind of like an estimate.

244
00:08:49,249 --> 00:08:50,971
It's just starting to feel like...

245
00:08:50,995 --> 00:08:53,175
maybe you don't
want people to know because

246
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I'm not worth the risk.

247
00:08:54,301 --> 00:08:55,279
- Like...
- What?

248
00:08:55,303 --> 00:08:58,170
That you don't think
this can actually work.

249
00:08:58,310 --> 00:08:59,278
Ugh.

250
00:08:59,311 --> 00:09:01,592
This is hopeless.

251
00:09:01,616 --> 00:09:02,695
No, you just...

252
00:09:02,719 --> 00:09:05,066
you have to hook people emotionally.

253
00:09:05,090 --> 00:09:06,770
Like, that's the only way
to win them over,

254
00:09:06,794 --> 00:09:08,606
because people are stupid
and they're ruled

255
00:09:08,630 --> 00:09:09,791
by their dumb hearts.

256
00:09:09,815 --> 00:09:12,047
I've spent a lifetime
bottling up my feelings.

257
00:09:12,071 --> 00:09:13,883
You want me to spill it to these pleebs?

258
00:09:13,907 --> 00:09:16,112
Yes! Give me a good sob story.

259
00:09:16,445 --> 00:09:19,184
Ugh, this is so beneath me.

260
00:09:22,257 --> 00:09:24,104
I had an awful dog named Buddy.

261
00:09:24,128 --> 00:09:25,774
Okay, not a great start.

262
00:09:25,798 --> 00:09:27,209
Here's the sad part.

263
00:09:27,233 --> 00:09:28,345
My mom got sick.

264
00:09:28,369 --> 00:09:29,271
G-great.

265
00:09:29,539 --> 00:09:31,451
We're getting somewhere.
Okay, let me write this down.

266
00:09:31,475 --> 00:09:35,994
I don't know how, but Buddy
sensed that I needed him,

267
00:09:36,018 --> 00:09:38,990
and he turned into the sweetest guy.

268
00:09:40,661 --> 00:09:42,641
And on the morning my mom died,

269
00:09:42,665 --> 00:09:44,645
Buddy wouldn't leave my side.

270
00:09:44,669 --> 00:09:45,871
He knew...

271
00:09:46,940 --> 00:09:48,008
my pain.

272
00:09:49,846 --> 00:09:51,446
Animals are amazing.

273
00:09:51,650 --> 00:09:55,323
Growing up, my bird
always knew when I was high.

274
00:09:56,158 --> 00:09:57,327
Every time.

275
00:09:58,997 --> 00:10:00,043
He was the best.

276
00:10:00,067 --> 00:10:02,012
Sometimes I'm in the field and I see

277
00:10:02,036 --> 00:10:03,903
a dog that looks like Buddy.

278
00:10:04,108 --> 00:10:08,249
It reminds me of how
great animals are to us,

279
00:10:09,953 --> 00:10:12,153
and I wanna try my best for them.

280
00:10:12,959 --> 00:10:15,172
Unless the Buddy lookalike is rabid.

281
00:10:15,196 --> 00:10:17,935
And then, of course, I keep my distance.

282
00:10:18,837 --> 00:10:20,683
I don't think I've ever heard you talk

283
00:10:20,707 --> 00:10:22,220
like an actual person before.

284
00:10:22,244 --> 00:10:26,986
Please, do not tell anyone
what has transpired here.

285
00:10:28,256 --> 00:10:30,159
I'm gonna tell everyone.

286
00:10:35,437 --> 00:10:36,607
Frank?

287
00:10:36,640 --> 00:10:37,785
Frank, are you poopin'?

288
00:10:37,809 --> 00:10:39,278
I need you, man.

289
00:10:41,382 --> 00:10:42,282
What is it?

290
00:10:42,451 --> 00:10:45,523
Hey, man, me and Emily
had a fight, and I just...

291
00:10:46,025 --> 00:10:47,704
I need a bro to lean on right now.

292
00:10:47,728 --> 00:10:49,909
W-wait. What happened? Is Emily okay?

293
00:10:49,933 --> 00:10:52,203
Uh, she's fine. I'm distraught.

294
00:10:52,236 --> 00:10:55,692
I'm sorry, do you mind?
I think the boys need the room.

295
00:10:56,178 --> 00:10:57,146
Okay.

296
00:11:01,054 --> 00:11:02,457
I... I will...

297
00:11:02,825 --> 00:11:04,929
text you the speech.

298
00:11:07,201 --> 00:11:08,335
Oh, love.

299
00:11:11,041 --> 00:11:11,941
Emily!

300
00:11:12,010 --> 00:11:13,990
Take off your sleep apnea mask
and turn off

301
00:11:14,014 --> 00:11:15,359
your rainforest soundscape.

302
00:11:15,383 --> 00:11:16,361
I need to sleep.

303
00:11:16,385 --> 00:11:19,291
And... and I, I wanna
make sure you're okay.

304
00:11:19,659 --> 00:11:21,930
Do you mind shuttin' the hell up?

305
00:11:21,964 --> 00:11:25,112
Uh, yeah, I do mind, actually,
because I have nowhere to go

306
00:11:25,136 --> 00:11:26,715
and nobody wants to have sex with me,

307
00:11:26,739 --> 00:11:28,419
which never happens, so.

308
00:11:31,115 --> 00:11:32,317
Thank you.

309
00:11:35,356 --> 00:11:37,002
Fine, you can bunk with me.

310
00:11:37,026 --> 00:11:38,272
But I am a very active sleeper,

311
00:11:38,296 --> 00:11:41,096
so don't crowd me
or you might get punched.

312
00:11:56,465 --> 00:11:58,135
Daddy!

313
00:11:58,202 --> 00:11:59,102
Hi!

314
00:11:59,371 --> 00:12:00,411
Are you okay?

315
00:12:00,507 --> 00:12:01,977
Hey.

316
00:12:02,010 --> 00:12:04,343
Uh... what are you guys doing here?

317
00:12:04,648 --> 00:12:05,951
Hi, kids.

318
00:12:05,984 --> 00:12:07,163
I miss you so much.

319
00:12:07,187 --> 00:12:08,867
Oh, my God, you would love this place.

320
00:12:08,891 --> 00:12:10,036
You have to come.

321
00:12:10,060 --> 00:12:11,839
I mean, I'm telling you,
the only thing that's good

322
00:12:11,863 --> 00:12:13,342
about my life is my family.

323
00:12:13,366 --> 00:12:15,045
Guys, Daddy, uh...

324
00:12:15,069 --> 00:12:16,448
had a lot to drink last night.

325
00:12:16,472 --> 00:12:17,942
Can we just shh!

326
00:12:18,142 --> 00:12:19,980
Thank you, Raquel St. James

327
00:12:20,013 --> 00:12:21,149
and Lieutenant Peaches.

328
00:12:21,173 --> 00:12:23,028
Uh, I'd also like to ask everyone else,

329
00:12:23,052 --> 00:12:25,066
please act respectfully to the nominees.

330
00:12:25,090 --> 00:12:27,202
It takes a lot of courage
to get up here.

331
00:12:27,226 --> 00:12:28,773
Moose!

332
00:12:28,797 --> 00:12:29,976
Stop saying moose!

333
00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:31,712
It sounds like you're booing.

334
00:12:31,736 --> 00:12:33,983
Let's keep this ACOOTY train
moving, huh?

335
00:12:34,007 --> 00:12:36,422
With our next nominee, Templeton Dudge,

336
00:12:36,446 --> 00:12:37,658
who has asked me to

337
00:12:37,682 --> 00:12:42,090
issue a strobe light warning
to pregnant women and the weak.

338
00:12:43,326 --> 00:12:45,993
Pay attention.
You might learn something.

339
00:12:47,166 --> 00:12:48,335
Cue the fog.

340
00:12:56,418 --> 00:12:57,421
Daisy.

341
00:12:57,454 --> 00:12:59,291
Cut the fog.

342
00:12:59,892 --> 00:13:01,572
I had a feast for the eyes planned,

343
00:13:01,596 --> 00:13:03,843
but tonight's about the animals.

344
00:13:03,867 --> 00:13:06,081
So I'm gonna speak from the heart.

345
00:13:06,105 --> 00:13:09,344
Growing up, I had
an awful dog named Buddy.

346
00:13:09,377 --> 00:13:11,693
Then my mom got sick.

347
00:13:11,718 --> 00:13:12,673
No.

348
00:13:12,698 --> 00:13:14,233
Cue the strings.

349
00:13:15,490 --> 00:13:17,202
What the hell is happening?

350
00:13:17,226 --> 00:13:18,126
I do...

351
00:13:18,162 --> 00:13:20,967
And it's like he knew that I needed him.

352
00:13:21,869 --> 00:13:24,002
He turned into the sweetest guy.

353
00:13:24,509 --> 00:13:26,478
And when my mom died, he...

354
00:13:26,980 --> 00:13:29,126
He never left my side that day.

355
00:13:29,150 --> 00:13:31,565
First he steals my bear rescue,
then he steals my desk,

356
00:13:31,589 --> 00:13:33,435
and now he steals my dead mom?

357
00:13:33,459 --> 00:13:36,208
Sometimes when I'm in the field
and I see a dog that looks

358
00:13:36,232 --> 00:13:38,580
like Buddy, I'm reminded
of all the great things

359
00:13:38,604 --> 00:13:40,082
that animals do for us.

360
00:13:40,106 --> 00:13:42,477
So, I try to do my best for them.

361
00:13:44,348 --> 00:13:45,885
Thank you.

362
00:13:49,091 --> 00:13:52,831
That's my slop! He-he fed you my slop!

363
00:13:52,865 --> 00:13:54,177
Wha... how did he get my slop?

364
00:13:54,201 --> 00:13:56,582
Daisy must've stolen it off my phone.

365
00:13:56,606 --> 00:13:57,506
I sure did.

366
00:13:57,542 --> 00:14:00,491
I put that sleeping mug
up to the face ID.

367
00:14:00,515 --> 00:14:02,035
Two-three fo' life!

368
00:14:03,385 --> 00:14:04,454
Oh! Oh!

369
00:14:04,487 --> 00:14:05,834
Let's bring up our, uh.

370
00:14:05,858 --> 00:14:08,062
final nominee, Frank Shaw.

371
00:14:08,462 --> 00:14:09,362
Yeah!

372
00:14:09,565 --> 00:14:11,478
How am I supposed to
follow that? That was great.

373
00:14:11,502 --> 00:14:12,548
It's like following myself.

374
00:14:12,572 --> 00:14:13,606
Whoo!

375
00:14:15,577 --> 00:14:17,146
Yeah!

376
00:14:35,050 --> 00:14:36,419
Oh, God.

377
00:14:37,688 --> 00:14:41,471
This is like watching an old man
get confused at the post office.

378
00:14:41,495 --> 00:14:42,497
We're screwed.

379
00:14:42,521 --> 00:14:43,944
Seriously, just give me the award.

380
00:14:43,968 --> 00:14:45,328
He's got nothing.

381
00:14:49,411 --> 00:14:51,209
- Oh... no.
- Frank, this is not the time.

382
00:14:51,233 --> 00:14:52,203
Frank!

383
00:14:52,228 --> 00:14:53,963
Oh, no. No, no, not that.

384
00:14:53,987 --> 00:14:55,967
I was joking when I said
take off your shirt.

385
00:14:55,991 --> 00:14:58,304
- Oh, god, I can't watch.
- Is he getting naked?

386
00:14:58,328 --> 00:14:59,297
No!

387
00:14:59,331 --> 00:15:00,611
Oh, there it is.

388
00:15:05,009 --> 00:15:06,979
This guy's jacked!

389
00:15:13,727 --> 00:15:14,728
I mean...

390
00:15:14,762 --> 00:15:16,165
he do look good.

391
00:15:22,443 --> 00:15:26,184
And the Animal Control
Officer of the Year is...

392
00:15:30,359 --> 00:15:31,424
Frank Shaw.

393
00:15:31,449 --> 00:15:32,751
Yes!

394
00:15:35,436 --> 00:15:37,240
Frank, you did it!

395
00:15:40,113 --> 00:15:43,825
Once again, the hedonistic
spirit of Bellingham has spoken.

396
00:15:44,989 --> 00:15:46,391
Officer Shaw.

397
00:15:47,193 --> 00:15:48,195
Yeah.

398
00:15:49,732 --> 00:15:52,070
Thank you, Pacific Northwest!

399
00:15:55,343 --> 00:15:57,276
Table 12, a few more bounces?

400
00:16:11,609 --> 00:16:13,112
- Hi.
- Hi.

401
00:16:13,145 --> 00:16:15,292
So, I didn't hear my name
in your acceptance speech,

402
00:16:15,316 --> 00:16:18,031
which is crazy, because
I'm basically why you won.

403
00:16:18,055 --> 00:16:20,469
My dedication to protein is why I won.

404
00:16:20,493 --> 00:16:21,706
But... thank you.

405
00:16:21,730 --> 00:16:24,611
I think I saw the Portland team
walking each other on leashes.

406
00:16:24,635 --> 00:16:26,782
Well, that tracks
with people from Oregon.

407
00:16:26,806 --> 00:16:29,139
This thing gets messier every year.

408
00:16:29,377 --> 00:16:30,277
Yeah.

409
00:16:30,513 --> 00:16:34,220
Things happen here that maybe...
wouldn't happen at home.

410
00:16:36,491 --> 00:16:38,539
Did you find a place to crash tonight?

411
00:16:38,563 --> 00:16:40,810
Uh, table 12 gave me some molly, so...

412
00:16:40,834 --> 00:16:45,175
I think I'm just gonna dance
until our pick up time tomorrow.

413
00:16:53,459 --> 00:16:54,638
Hey.

414
00:16:54,662 --> 00:16:56,365
- You got my text.
- Yeah.

415
00:16:56,398 --> 00:16:58,865
I was worried you weren't gonna come.

416
00:16:59,104 --> 00:17:01,217
Hotel rooms are off-limits, but...

417
00:17:01,241 --> 00:17:03,508
tiny little photo booths are okay?

418
00:17:04,682 --> 00:17:06,094
I'm sorry. That was...

419
00:17:06,118 --> 00:17:07,731
I didn't mean that. That sounded bad.

420
00:17:07,755 --> 00:17:09,199
No, no, no, I've...

421
00:17:09,223 --> 00:17:12,487
I've been thinking a lot
about what you said, and...

422
00:17:12,731 --> 00:17:14,367
I'm really sorry.

423
00:17:14,969 --> 00:17:17,049
'Cause the truth is, you are just...

424
00:17:17,073 --> 00:17:19,410
in every way, completely...

425
00:17:20,815 --> 00:17:22,548
Definitely worth the risk.

426
00:17:23,386 --> 00:17:26,134
So, I'm gonna call my boss
first thing on Monday.

427
00:17:26,158 --> 00:17:27,628
Wait, really?

428
00:17:27,662 --> 00:17:29,022
Yeah, 'cause I...

429
00:17:30,667 --> 00:17:32,604
Well, I love you, and...

430
00:17:33,674 --> 00:17:35,577
I just wanna be with you.

431
00:17:36,512 --> 00:17:37,792
I love you, too.

432
00:17:38,081 --> 00:17:39,694
You sure you wanna do this?

433
00:17:39,718 --> 00:17:40,618
Yeah.

434
00:17:46,432 --> 00:17:49,213
Okay, okay, let's just stagger
our entrances to be safe.

435
00:17:49,237 --> 00:17:51,318
'Cause we're so close,
so let's not mess up now.

436
00:17:51,342 --> 00:17:52,654
- Home stretch.
- Okay.

437
00:17:52,678 --> 00:17:53,856
- Monday.
- Mm-hmm.

438
00:17:53,880 --> 00:17:55,416
- Ooh!
- Okay.

439
00:17:58,255 --> 00:18:00,788
That'll be good for my passport photo.

440
00:18:01,562 --> 00:18:02,641
Pardon me, folks.

441
00:18:02,665 --> 00:18:05,198
Good to see you. Good to see you, Jim.

442
00:18:07,140 --> 00:18:08,643
Look at that!

443
00:18:14,889 --> 00:18:16,559
This is bad.

444
00:18:17,194 --> 00:18:18,714
This is really bad.

445
00:18:19,397 --> 00:18:22,533
I heard they're serving
sherbert in a few minutes.

446
00:18:24,374 --> 00:18:25,343
Hey.

447
00:18:25,376 --> 00:18:27,447
Something bad happened.

448
00:18:27,480 --> 00:18:28,415
What?

449
00:18:30,186 --> 00:18:31,288
Oh, my God.

450
00:18:31,722 --> 00:18:34,169
How fast can we turn that into a poster?

451
00:18:34,193 --> 00:18:36,431
Business center's open 24/7.

452
00:18:37,166 --> 00:18:38,966
Frank, Frank, Frank, Frank!

453
00:18:39,437 --> 00:18:42,343
Kids are finally asleep.
Who's ready to party?

454
00:18:43,412 --> 00:18:44,480
What?

455
00:18:45,818 --> 00:18:46,853
Oh, my God.

456
00:18:46,886 --> 00:18:48,132
Oh, God. It's Wayne.

457
00:18:48,156 --> 00:18:49,058
I'm getting fired.

458
00:18:49,082 --> 00:18:50,202
Oh, my God. This is it.

459
00:18:50,226 --> 00:18:51,906
I have to do something.

460
00:18:52,463 --> 00:18:54,602
Don't worry, I'm gonna save you.

461
00:18:54,635 --> 00:18:55,770
Oh my God!

462
00:18:57,708 --> 00:18:59,319
You are... fire!

463
00:18:59,343 --> 00:19:00,912
Come on, this way! This way!

464
00:19:00,937 --> 00:19:02,460
The exit's this way! Follow me!

465
00:19:02,484 --> 00:19:04,296
Thank God I knew where this was.

466
00:19:04,320 --> 00:19:06,387
- It's okay.
- What's happening?

467
00:19:10,233 --> 00:19:11,535
Fire save.

468
00:19:20,453 --> 00:19:22,224
- Feels right.
- Mm-hmm.

469
00:19:22,390 --> 00:19:24,638
Hey. Congrats again, Frank.

470
00:19:24,662 --> 00:19:26,441
And I don't say it enough, but...

471
00:19:26,465 --> 00:19:27,610
you're my hero, man.

472
00:19:27,634 --> 00:19:29,514
- You say it all the time.
- Right.

473
00:19:29,538 --> 00:19:32,554
Now, ditch that wobbly hall
table and reclaim your desk.

474
00:19:32,578 --> 00:19:33,747
Really?

475
00:19:34,481 --> 00:19:38,189
In fact, all shall return
to their proper desks

476
00:19:38,222 --> 00:19:39,934
now that I've vanquished the pale,

477
00:19:39,958 --> 00:19:42,196
muscularly atrophied beast.

478
00:19:42,229 --> 00:19:44,769
Normalcy is returned.

479
00:19:44,802 --> 00:19:46,338
- Yeah!
- Thank God!

480
00:19:46,372 --> 00:19:49,039
The napping was no good under this desk.

481
00:19:50,580 --> 00:19:53,028
Hey, um, can I have
everyone's attention?

482
00:19:53,052 --> 00:19:54,492
I have a little...

483
00:19:54,889 --> 00:19:56,458
announcement, um...

484
00:19:57,127 --> 00:19:59,999
Due to my relations with Shred, um...

485
00:20:00,567 --> 00:20:04,274
Yeah, I've been suspended, um,
pending an investigation.

486
00:20:04,341 --> 00:20:05,787
- What?
- But I consented!

487
00:20:05,811 --> 00:20:08,258
- It's okay.
- I consented to the whole thing!

488
00:20:08,282 --> 00:20:09,727
Yeah, um, this means there will be, uh,

489
00:20:09,751 --> 00:20:13,492
an interim supervisor filling
my position until, um...

490
00:20:13,860 --> 00:20:15,405
yeah, further notice.

491
00:20:15,429 --> 00:20:18,296
- Who's taking over?
- Uh, yeah, it's, um...

492
00:20:18,803 --> 00:20:19,805
It's...

493
00:20:30,459 --> 00:20:33,041
I guess I did die
in that dachshund parade.

494
00:20:33,065 --> 00:20:34,401
I'm in hell.

495
00:20:34,434 --> 00:20:35,580
I'm still your god.

496
00:20:35,604 --> 00:20:36,915
Well, you'd be the devil.

497
00:20:36,939 --> 00:20:38,619
Well, I'd be your boss.

498
00:20:40,046 --> 00:20:41,549
The boss.

499
00:20:47,460 --> 00:20:49,575
Morning meetings won't be
the same without you.

500
00:20:49,599 --> 00:20:51,612
He's already threatening
to ban meeting snacks.

501
00:20:51,636 --> 00:20:53,840
Come on. It's not goodbye, guys.

502
00:20:53,874 --> 00:20:55,319
It's see ya later.

503
00:20:55,343 --> 00:20:56,721
Pending a thorough investigation,

504
00:20:56,745 --> 00:20:59,460
an ethics board review and
reinstatement confirmation

505
00:20:59,484 --> 00:21:00,663
from the mayor's office.

506
00:21:00,687 --> 00:21:02,567
I just hope they don't
subpoena our texts.

507
00:21:02,591 --> 00:21:05,038
I sent you that Jessica Rabbit
GIF on your birthday.

508
00:21:05,062 --> 00:21:06,775
- I mean...
- You're gonna be fine.

509
00:21:06,799 --> 00:21:08,579
And in the meantime,
we'll make Templeton's life

510
00:21:08,603 --> 00:21:10,283
as hellish as possible.

511
00:21:10,540 --> 00:21:12,085
I've already started.

512
00:21:12,109 --> 00:21:14,413
Daisy! Grab me a tire jack.

513
00:21:14,915 --> 00:21:16,595
Got a flat. Again.

514
00:21:16,619 --> 00:21:18,799
Wait, is this what it's like
to not be the boss?

515
00:21:18,823 --> 00:21:19,968
I kinda like it.

516
00:21:19,992 --> 00:21:21,470
Can I throw something?

517
00:21:21,494 --> 00:21:23,761
I'd be disappointed if you didn't.

518
00:21:24,835 --> 00:21:25,837
Okay.

519
00:21:27,674 --> 00:21:29,477
Oh, no!

520
00:21:30,947 --> 00:21:32,894
I've never respected you more.

521
00:21:32,918 --> 00:21:34,188
- Run!
- Ahh!

522
00:21:34,213 --> 00:21:35,178
What?

523
00:21:39,027 --> 00:21:43,079
CREDITS