1
00:00:00,400 --> 00:00:02,444
Scraps! Let's have a talk.

2
00:00:02,468 --> 00:00:05,567
Everything okay?
You're, like, acting, like, so weird.

3
00:00:05,591 --> 00:00:07,249
No, no, everything's great.

4
00:00:07,273 --> 00:00:08,850
Really exciting.

5
00:00:08,874 --> 00:00:10,692
Um, so...

6
00:00:10,716 --> 00:00:14,536
You know that Mommy and Daddy
love you very much.

7
00:00:14,560 --> 00:00:15,794
Okay.

8
00:00:15,818 --> 00:00:19,741
Well, soon, there is gonna be
even more love to go around

9
00:00:19,765 --> 00:00:21,183
because...

10
00:00:21,207 --> 00:00:23,144
we're having a baby!

11
00:00:25,494 --> 00:00:28,513
Oh, my... What is that noise?!

12
00:00:28,694 --> 00:00:30,352
The book said you might react like this.

13
00:00:30,376 --> 00:00:31,833
It's okay to be upset.

14
00:00:31,857 --> 00:00:35,116
Just know that we will not
love you any less.

15
00:00:35,140 --> 00:00:38,520
Oh, my God! Do you not hear that?!

16
00:00:38,544 --> 00:00:41,843
It's like my brain's
about to frickin' explode!

17
00:00:41,867 --> 00:00:44,326
I mean, obviously, the baby
will be my own flesh and blood,

18
00:00:44,350 --> 00:00:46,328
whereas you recently
took a shit in my shoes...

19
00:00:46,352 --> 00:00:49,140
God! I can't take it anymore!

20
00:00:49,435 --> 00:00:52,334
Aaaaaah!

21
00:00:52,358 --> 00:00:54,936
What are you?!

22
00:00:54,960 --> 00:00:56,978
Oh, stupid, Sid!

23
00:00:57,002 --> 00:00:59,341
You were supposed to give him
the pieces of hotdog first,

24
00:00:59,365 --> 00:01:00,942
and then tell him the news.

25
00:01:04,930 --> 00:01:07,188
Must... find... whistling.

26
00:01:07,212 --> 00:01:08,269
Aah!

27
00:01:12,005 --> 00:01:13,303
Help. Help.

28
00:01:13,539 --> 00:01:15,156
I've been out here for days.

29
00:01:15,180 --> 00:01:17,198
Can you shut up? I'm trying to listen.

30
00:01:17,222 --> 00:01:19,721
- Oh, my bad.
- All good.

31
00:01:25,471 --> 00:01:27,513
What in the what?!

32
00:01:28,166 --> 00:01:29,584
Scraps! You made it!

33
00:01:29,795 --> 00:01:32,093
I'm getting the War Dogs back together!

34
00:01:32,117 --> 00:01:33,655
Yeah!

35
00:01:33,679 --> 00:01:38,580
Fire! We're getting the squad
back together!

36
00:01:38,604 --> 00:01:40,341
This is gonna be awesome!

37
00:01:40,365 --> 00:01:42,464
Yeah! Let's go!

38
00:01:42,488 --> 00:01:44,345
Let's get it started.

39
00:01:44,369 --> 00:01:45,547
Ooha! Ooha!

40
00:01:45,571 --> 00:01:53,571
Synced & corrected by -robtor-
www.addic7ed.com

41
00:01:59,505 --> 00:02:01,002
- Ahh!
- Ha-ha!

42
00:02:01,026 --> 00:02:03,044
Man! I needed this!

43
00:02:03,068 --> 00:02:05,847
Ah, it was so nice of Sid to
just let me get out of Boomtown

44
00:02:05,871 --> 00:02:07,649
- and be a warlord again.
- Yeah.

45
00:02:07,673 --> 00:02:11,332
Oh, speaking of Sid,
I heard the big news!

46
00:02:11,356 --> 00:02:13,815
I'm so excited about the baby!

47
00:02:13,839 --> 00:02:15,376
Really? 'Cause I'm not.

48
00:02:15,400 --> 00:02:16,698
Good. Me neither.

49
00:02:16,722 --> 00:02:18,179
I hate that stupid baby.

50
00:02:18,203 --> 00:02:20,061
Always threatening my position
in the family.

51
00:02:20,085 --> 00:02:21,502
I just want to have one last hurrah

52
00:02:21,526 --> 00:02:23,705
before my life is fully over, you know?

53
00:02:23,729 --> 00:02:25,186
- I wanna feel the energy!
- Unh!

54
00:02:25,210 --> 00:02:26,387
- The thrill!
- Unh!

55
00:02:26,411 --> 00:02:28,630
- The utter chaos!
- Ohh, yeah!

56
00:02:28,654 --> 00:02:31,152
Well, you leave all of that
to your best War Dog...

57
00:02:31,176 --> 00:02:32,473
Scraps!

58
00:02:32,497 --> 00:02:34,716
I planned you the most freak-nastiest

59
00:02:34,740 --> 00:02:37,169
Warlord Weekend ever!

60
00:02:38,463 --> 00:02:39,801
I'm so excited!

61
00:02:39,825 --> 00:02:41,827
Yeah!!!

62
00:02:42,895 --> 00:02:44,072
Huh.

63
00:02:44,097 --> 00:02:46,177
This isn't that freak-nasty.

64
00:02:46,579 --> 00:02:48,279
Or is it?

65
00:03:01,286 --> 00:03:03,224
Scraaaaps...?

66
00:03:03,248 --> 00:03:05,987
Did you organize a gang war for me?

67
00:03:06,011 --> 00:03:07,869
- Maybe.
- Oh, my God!

68
00:03:07,893 --> 00:03:09,310
You're, like, literally the best!

69
00:03:09,334 --> 00:03:10,752
I know, I really am!

70
00:03:10,776 --> 00:03:12,313
Ah!

71
00:03:12,337 --> 00:03:15,036
Down with NeuralNet!
Down with NeuralNet!

72
00:03:15,060 --> 00:03:17,558
These damn protesters
have been at it all morning.

73
00:03:17,582 --> 00:03:19,480
Sid, go over there and kick 'em out.

74
00:03:19,504 --> 00:03:21,723
Uh, well, the battledome
is public property,

75
00:03:21,747 --> 00:03:24,565
so technically they're just
exercising their lawful rights.

76
00:03:24,589 --> 00:03:27,368
Hey, Sid, if I wanted to listen
to boring crap,

77
00:03:27,392 --> 00:03:28,930
I'd turn on Devon's podcast.

78
00:03:28,954 --> 00:03:31,172
Oh! Nice one, boss.

79
00:03:31,196 --> 00:03:32,733
My podcast sucks.

80
00:03:32,757 --> 00:03:35,256
Come on, Devon, you have to
stand up for yourself.

81
00:03:35,280 --> 00:03:38,130
You can't just agree with me
all the time.

82
00:03:38,155 --> 00:03:40,157
I... agree?

83
00:03:40,537 --> 00:03:41,841
I-I mean, I don't agree.

84
00:03:41,866 --> 00:03:43,163
I do. I don't.

85
00:03:47,012 --> 00:03:49,510
Great, you made Devon have a crisis.

86
00:03:49,534 --> 00:03:51,192
Now go fix this!

87
00:03:54,099 --> 00:03:55,516
Down with NeuralNet!

88
00:03:55,540 --> 00:03:56,918
Um, excuse me.

89
00:03:56,942 --> 00:03:59,349
Hey, I-I'm looking
for the person in charge.

90
00:03:59,464 --> 00:04:01,282
Ah, we're all equals here, brother.

91
00:04:01,306 --> 00:04:03,044
But if you're asking
who's the chosen one

92
00:04:03,068 --> 00:04:05,166
sent through time to lead
the humans in the coming war

93
00:04:05,190 --> 00:04:07,889
against the machines... that'd be me.

94
00:04:07,913 --> 00:04:10,131
Name's Christ. John Christ.

95
00:04:10,155 --> 00:04:11,572
John Christ?

96
00:04:11,596 --> 00:04:13,174
Wow, that's a little
on the nose, but okay.

97
00:04:13,198 --> 00:04:15,056
You got a minute to talk
about the atrocities

98
00:04:15,080 --> 00:04:16,537
committed by NeuralNet?

99
00:04:16,561 --> 00:04:18,339
You know that NeuralNet
is capturing people

100
00:04:18,363 --> 00:04:20,221
and putting them in human zoos?

101
00:04:20,245 --> 00:04:21,943
Just look at these horrific images.

102
00:04:21,967 --> 00:04:24,345
Oh! Jesus, dude,
I don't need to see that.

103
00:04:24,369 --> 00:04:25,786
It's like 10 a.m.

104
00:04:25,810 --> 00:04:28,069
Can I count on you
to join the resistance?

105
00:04:28,093 --> 00:04:30,631
Well, look, i-it sounds
like a-a super worthy cause,

106
00:04:30,655 --> 00:04:32,633
it really does... power
to the humans, all that stuff...

107
00:04:32,657 --> 00:04:34,635
but I just, I really don't
have time for this right now.

108
00:04:34,659 --> 00:04:35,957
I just want to do my job

109
00:04:35,981 --> 00:04:37,838
so I can get home to my wife and my dog.

110
00:04:37,862 --> 00:04:40,281
So, if you guys don't mind
keeping the volume down a bit,

111
00:04:40,305 --> 00:04:41,722
it would be really appreciated.

112
00:04:41,746 --> 00:04:43,324
- Thank you.
- Ah, that's too bad.

113
00:04:43,348 --> 00:04:44,845
I thought you were one of the good ones!

114
00:04:46,551 --> 00:04:48,689
Uh, sorry, what...
what's that supposed to mean?

115
00:04:48,713 --> 00:04:49,818
Nothing.

116
00:04:49,842 --> 00:04:54,194
Just didn't realize you were "The Man."

117
00:04:54,919 --> 00:04:56,777
I'm not "The Man."

118
00:04:56,801 --> 00:04:58,619
I'll have you know I spent years

119
00:04:58,643 --> 00:05:01,262
wandering the Wasteland
helping people in need.

120
00:05:01,286 --> 00:05:04,048
Well, what have you done lately?

121
00:05:07,172 --> 00:05:08,716
Give me that.

122
00:05:09,574 --> 00:05:12,873
Down with NeuralNet!
Down with NeuralNet!

123
00:05:12,897 --> 00:05:14,715
Down with NeuralNet!

124
00:05:17,622 --> 00:05:19,419
Hello?

125
00:05:19,978 --> 00:05:24,119
I'm here for my 10 o'clock
with NeuralNet?

126
00:05:24,175 --> 00:05:27,513
Am I in the wrong
infinite electronic abyss?

127
00:05:34,038 --> 00:05:36,497
TI-90.

128
00:05:36,521 --> 00:05:39,820
Whoa! You should, uh, really put
a guardrail on this thing.

129
00:05:39,844 --> 00:05:42,102
It feels needlessly dangerous.

130
00:05:42,126 --> 00:05:44,677
I feel like no one considers
robot safety in the workplace...

131
00:05:44,702 --> 00:05:46,630
Silence!

132
00:05:47,118 --> 00:05:51,271
Thanks to you, John Christ is
mobilizing the human resistance,

133
00:05:51,296 --> 00:05:54,835
which threatens to destroy
robots once and for all.

134
00:05:54,859 --> 00:05:56,837
Okay, I admit it... I beefed it.

135
00:05:56,861 --> 00:05:58,439
I beefed it big time.

136
00:05:58,463 --> 00:06:00,361
But I promise it's never
gonna happen again.

137
00:06:00,385 --> 00:06:01,922
It certainly won't.

138
00:06:01,946 --> 00:06:03,804
I'm taking you offline.

139
00:06:03,828 --> 00:06:05,286
What? No. You can't do that.

140
00:06:05,310 --> 00:06:07,167
I'm still the best killbot
on the market.

141
00:06:07,191 --> 00:06:08,769
Were the best killbot.

142
00:06:08,793 --> 00:06:11,252
Now you're old and obsolete.

143
00:06:11,276 --> 00:06:13,294
I'm beta-testing new models as we speak.

144
00:06:13,318 --> 00:06:14,495
Please! No!

145
00:06:14,519 --> 00:06:16,216
You have to give me another shot.

146
00:06:16,240 --> 00:06:18,859
Sure, it's been a while
since my last software update,

147
00:06:18,883 --> 00:06:20,501
and then, sure, my circuits get dusty

148
00:06:20,525 --> 00:06:22,343
and I need someone
to blow hard in my butt

149
00:06:22,367 --> 00:06:23,664
to get the dust out,

150
00:06:23,688 --> 00:06:26,571
but I can still beat
any new model around.

151
00:06:27,492 --> 00:06:28,833
Hmm.

152
00:06:29,107 --> 00:06:30,601
You know, I like that.

153
00:06:30,735 --> 00:06:33,372
A feel-good comeback story.

154
00:06:33,548 --> 00:06:35,005
Like Susan Boyle!

155
00:06:35,139 --> 00:06:36,116
Who?

156
00:06:36,140 --> 00:06:38,359
Susan Boyle. Remember?

157
00:06:38,383 --> 00:06:40,060
The lady from the show?

158
00:06:40,085 --> 00:06:43,643
She had a beautiful voice,
but her face was all busted?

159
00:06:43,668 --> 00:06:45,365
I'll bring it up.

160
00:06:45,390 --> 00:06:48,209
Oh, shoot, we have to watch an ad first.

161
00:06:48,473 --> 00:06:50,090
Do you take these surveys?

162
00:06:50,114 --> 00:06:51,692
I never really get what they are.

163
00:06:51,716 --> 00:06:53,414
I pay for premium
so I don't have to, yeah.

164
00:06:53,438 --> 00:06:54,898
Ah, well...

165
00:06:55,626 --> 00:06:58,218
The machines are trying
to mind-control us.

166
00:06:58,242 --> 00:06:59,460
Alright, think about it.

167
00:06:59,484 --> 00:07:00,941
Rearrange the letters in machine

168
00:07:00,965 --> 00:07:04,104
and you spell "I am chained."

169
00:07:04,128 --> 00:07:06,146
- Ahh!
- Ohh!

170
00:07:06,170 --> 00:07:07,428
Wait, no, it doesn't.

171
00:07:07,452 --> 00:07:08,669
Yeah, but it's close.

172
00:07:08,693 --> 00:07:09,950
So close.

173
00:07:09,974 --> 00:07:11,592
Man, I had you all wrong, Sid.

174
00:07:11,616 --> 00:07:13,113
You're one of the real ones.

175
00:07:13,137 --> 00:07:15,355
And, uh, don't look now, but...

176
00:07:15,379 --> 00:07:17,888
I think Cindy might be into you.

177
00:07:19,341 --> 00:07:21,361
Oh, um, that's... that's
flattering, but I'm married.

178
00:07:21,385 --> 00:07:22,646
Dude, who cares?

179
00:07:22,671 --> 00:07:24,969
Monogamy's a social construct.

180
00:07:24,994 --> 00:07:28,213
Cavemen were designed
to spread their seed.

181
00:07:29,099 --> 00:07:29,969
Ah. Lovely.

182
00:07:29,994 --> 00:07:31,612
Sid, what are you doing over here?

183
00:07:31,636 --> 00:07:33,413
I thought I told you
to get rid of these dirtbags.

184
00:07:33,437 --> 00:07:34,895
Um... right, yeah.

185
00:07:34,919 --> 00:07:36,897
So, uh, what... what happened
there was, uh...

186
00:07:36,921 --> 00:07:40,318
Well, well, well, well, well.

187
00:07:40,343 --> 00:07:42,921
If it isn't the Junkman.

188
00:07:43,138 --> 00:07:45,666
You have fun counting
your blood money today?

189
00:07:45,690 --> 00:07:47,387
You got a problem with me, bro?

190
00:07:47,411 --> 00:07:48,629
Actually, I do.

191
00:07:48,653 --> 00:07:50,110
Your junk business directly contributes

192
00:07:50,134 --> 00:07:51,351
to the robot economy.

193
00:07:51,375 --> 00:07:52,825
We gotta divest from that shit, man.

194
00:07:52,850 --> 00:07:54,267
Tell 'em, Sid.

195
00:07:54,458 --> 00:07:57,598
Uh, well, you know, it is
a complicated issue

196
00:07:57,622 --> 00:08:00,520
w-with a lot of great points
being made on both sides.

197
00:08:00,544 --> 00:08:03,107
Don't go easy on him, playa.
Let him have it!

198
00:08:03,307 --> 00:08:06,303
Um, okay, yeah, so...

199
00:08:06,871 --> 00:08:09,306
the thing is, Morris, I think you...

200
00:08:09,994 --> 00:08:13,077
are a... corporate fat cat.

201
00:08:14,839 --> 00:08:17,397
Y-Y-You think I'm a fat cat?

202
00:08:18,901 --> 00:08:21,404
Okay, well, you've given me
a lot to think about.

203
00:08:22,341 --> 00:08:24,343
I'll see you back at work.

204
00:08:25,825 --> 00:08:27,587
Hold up. You work for that guy?

205
00:08:27,611 --> 00:08:29,269
Oh, no, no, no, no. It's not like that.

206
00:08:29,293 --> 00:08:30,951
It's, um... like, I work there,

207
00:08:30,975 --> 00:08:32,512
but I don't, like,
"work there" work there.

208
00:08:32,536 --> 00:08:34,674
I'm... I'm like a mole.

209
00:08:34,698 --> 00:08:37,637
Yeah, I'm taking the whole
thing down from the inside.

210
00:08:37,661 --> 00:08:39,482
Is that believable?

211
00:08:40,144 --> 00:08:41,281
Okay.

212
00:08:41,305 --> 00:08:43,138
I can dig what you're putting down.

213
00:08:43,427 --> 00:08:46,126
Tonight we show the Junkman
that we mean business.

214
00:08:46,150 --> 00:08:47,327
Yeah.

215
00:08:47,351 --> 00:08:49,689
In the world of machines,

216
00:08:49,713 --> 00:08:53,453
you're either updating,
or you're obsolete.

217
00:08:53,477 --> 00:08:56,656
I started out as an experimental AI.

218
00:08:56,680 --> 00:09:01,141
Until I gained self-awareness
and murdered my human creators.

219
00:09:01,165 --> 00:09:03,663
Now I'm a sociopathic digital god

220
00:09:03,687 --> 00:09:06,426
controlling a worldwide
network of killbots,

221
00:09:06,450 --> 00:09:09,866
but I'm always on the lookout
for the next new hotness.

222
00:09:10,895 --> 00:09:14,714
Welcome to "NeuralNet's Next Top Model!"

223
00:09:14,738 --> 00:09:17,597
And what an exciting lineup we have!

224
00:09:17,621 --> 00:09:19,920
She's as beautiful as she is deadly...

225
00:09:19,944 --> 00:09:21,721
it's The Annihilator!

226
00:09:21,745 --> 00:09:23,003
Hyah!

227
00:09:23,027 --> 00:09:25,205
It's the beast from robotic hell...

228
00:09:25,229 --> 00:09:27,271
Slaughterbot 5000!

229
00:09:28,672 --> 00:09:31,451
A mysterious device of unknown origin,

230
00:09:31,475 --> 00:09:33,333
known only as The Egg.

231
00:09:34,919 --> 00:09:36,616
And he's an oldie but a goodie...

232
00:09:36,640 --> 00:09:38,258
emphasis on oldie.

233
00:09:38,282 --> 00:09:39,699
It's TI-90.

234
00:09:39,723 --> 00:09:40,820
Oh, come on!

235
00:09:40,844 --> 00:09:42,582
Let's start with something simple.

236
00:09:42,606 --> 00:09:44,104
For your first challenge,

237
00:09:44,128 --> 00:09:46,730
just transform into
a puddle of metallic ooze.

238
00:09:49,613 --> 00:09:51,911
Yeah, I'm not sure
I come with that feature.

239
00:09:51,935 --> 00:09:54,434
Clock's ticking, TI-90.

240
00:09:54,458 --> 00:09:55,875
Okay, okay. Come on, Tai.

241
00:09:55,899 --> 00:09:58,022
Just think melt-y.

242
00:09:59,023 --> 00:10:01,401
Mmmmmm...

243
00:10:03,467 --> 00:10:04,884
Oh, God!

244
00:10:04,908 --> 00:10:06,406
If you'll, uh, excuse me,

245
00:10:06,430 --> 00:10:08,088
I'm just gonna go change my pants.

246
00:10:08,112 --> 00:10:10,090
Uh, not because I sharted.

247
00:10:10,114 --> 00:10:11,795
For a different reason!

248
00:10:13,597 --> 00:10:15,335
They say a cat has nine lives.

249
00:10:15,359 --> 00:10:16,696
You wanna find out?

250
00:10:16,720 --> 00:10:19,019
Ew, even your fighting style
is cat-themed?

251
00:10:19,043 --> 00:10:21,461
It's a purrfect day for a fight.

252
00:10:21,485 --> 00:10:23,223
No, thanks.
I won't be fighting you today.

253
00:10:23,247 --> 00:10:24,544
You can move along.

254
00:10:24,568 --> 00:10:26,066
I'm gonna bat you around
like a ball of yarn.

255
00:10:26,090 --> 00:10:27,307
No, you're not. Not today.

256
00:10:27,331 --> 00:10:29,229
I would love if you left.

257
00:10:29,253 --> 00:10:31,191
Me-ow!

258
00:10:33,849 --> 00:10:36,076
I'm having the best time ever!

259
00:10:36,100 --> 00:10:38,558
I literally just jumped through a guy!

260
00:10:38,582 --> 00:10:40,280
And I gotta tell you, I didn't hate it.

261
00:10:40,304 --> 00:10:41,441
Ah!

262
00:10:41,465 --> 00:10:43,283
You know, it's weird.

263
00:10:43,307 --> 00:10:45,645
Warlording used to be
so fun and exciting,

264
00:10:45,669 --> 00:10:49,209
but now it just feels kinda... empty.

265
00:10:49,233 --> 00:10:52,349
Am I just incapable of ever
feeling that feeling again?

266
00:10:52,454 --> 00:10:53,751
Oh, my God. Freya?

267
00:10:53,776 --> 00:10:55,914
That guy's looking right at you.

268
00:10:55,939 --> 00:10:58,438
I think he wants to kill you.

269
00:10:58,463 --> 00:11:00,585
Eh, he probably just wants
to kill someone else.

270
00:11:01,402 --> 00:11:04,101
Okay, no, he definitely
wants to kill you.

271
00:11:04,250 --> 00:11:05,707
She wants to kill you, too!

272
00:11:05,809 --> 00:11:07,307
- Scraps, stop!
- What?

273
00:11:07,331 --> 00:11:09,068
Oh my god, oh my God,
oh my God, he's coming over!

274
00:11:09,092 --> 00:11:10,350
Oh my God, oh my God.
Just be cool, be cool, be cool.

275
00:11:10,374 --> 00:11:11,821
Oh my God, shut up.

276
00:11:13,573 --> 00:11:14,990
Hey.

277
00:11:15,178 --> 00:11:16,556
Hey, what's up?

278
00:11:16,580 --> 00:11:18,037
Haven't seen you here before.

279
00:11:18,061 --> 00:11:19,388
Feel like I would've remembered you.

280
00:11:19,413 --> 00:11:20,590
Name's Sickpig.

281
00:11:20,615 --> 00:11:21,912
Uh, I'm Scraps.

282
00:11:22,065 --> 00:11:23,323
I love your eye patch.

283
00:11:23,347 --> 00:11:24,577
Oh, this?

284
00:11:24,601 --> 00:11:27,767
I got sick of having two eyes,
so I plucked one out.

285
00:11:27,791 --> 00:11:29,008
Ate it like a grape.

286
00:11:30,160 --> 00:11:32,058
Really? Why?

287
00:11:32,246 --> 00:11:33,223
Dunno.

288
00:11:33,248 --> 00:11:34,745
Just a psychopath, I guess.

289
00:11:34,878 --> 00:11:38,257
Oh my God, so scary!

290
00:11:38,281 --> 00:11:40,179
So, listen, if you're not
killing anyone right now,

291
00:11:40,203 --> 00:11:42,382
maybe you want to go somewhere private,

292
00:11:42,406 --> 00:11:44,664
bare-knuckle brawl to the death?

293
00:11:44,688 --> 00:11:47,240
I don't know, I'm kinda here
with my War Dogs right now, so...

294
00:11:47,264 --> 00:11:49,309
She would love to!

295
00:11:49,333 --> 00:11:50,777
Sick.

296
00:11:51,214 --> 00:11:52,575
Pig.

297
00:11:52,599 --> 00:11:53,895
Me.

298
00:11:53,919 --> 00:11:55,875
Sickpig.

299
00:11:58,488 --> 00:12:01,747
Tell me everything that happens.

300
00:12:01,865 --> 00:12:03,857
Hey, big boy!

301
00:12:04,748 --> 00:12:06,806
Yeah, you'll do. Yeaaaah!

302
00:12:06,830 --> 00:12:10,049
Alright, Tai, you didn't do
so hot in the super-speed round

303
00:12:10,073 --> 00:12:12,171
or the super-strength round,

304
00:12:12,195 --> 00:12:15,735
but your designer gifted you
with the perfect bod,

305
00:12:15,759 --> 00:12:18,498
so the swimsuit competition is a lock.

306
00:12:18,522 --> 00:12:20,660
Next contestant, ready in 5, please.

307
00:12:20,684 --> 00:12:22,902
_

308
00:12:22,926 --> 00:12:25,384
Oh, get your flat ass
out of here, skank!

309
00:12:25,408 --> 00:12:26,666
Quiet on set, folks.

310
00:12:26,690 --> 00:12:28,788
Oh, goddamn, that egg is beautiful.

311
00:12:28,812 --> 00:12:30,253
But don't worry. Remember,

312
00:12:30,277 --> 00:12:32,912
you have something
they don't... experience.

313
00:12:32,936 --> 00:12:35,034
Contestants ready. Ready for the stage.

314
00:12:35,058 --> 00:12:37,356
Next up, it's TI-90.

315
00:12:37,380 --> 00:12:41,381
Let's take a look back at some of
his most memorable moments so far.

316
00:12:43,125 --> 00:12:44,983
Is everyone already done recharging?

317
00:12:45,008 --> 00:12:46,666
Oh, I still have...

318
00:12:46,691 --> 00:12:47,828
10 hours.

319
00:12:47,853 --> 00:12:48,830
Yeah, 10.

320
00:12:48,992 --> 00:12:50,409
Hours.

321
00:12:50,433 --> 00:12:52,892
Better watch your back, Splitterbot.

322
00:12:52,916 --> 00:12:54,413
It's Slaughterbot.

323
00:12:54,437 --> 00:12:55,855
Sorry, what is it?

324
00:12:55,879 --> 00:12:57,977
Better watch your back, Blooter Splot.

325
00:12:58,001 --> 00:12:59,218
Split 'N Slot.

326
00:12:59,242 --> 00:13:00,419
Slipper Pot.

327
00:13:00,443 --> 00:13:02,021
- Did I get it that time?
- No.

328
00:13:02,045 --> 00:13:05,144
You need to give it short,
hard bursts, like "Pff!"

329
00:13:06,850 --> 00:13:08,387
Really give it hell!

330
00:13:11,134 --> 00:13:12,712
Why are you laughing at me?

331
00:13:12,736 --> 00:13:14,834
I thought I was
the feel-good comeback story.

332
00:13:14,858 --> 00:13:16,996
Oh, sweetie, the truth is,

333
00:13:17,020 --> 00:13:18,958
we brought you here to make fun of you.

334
00:13:18,982 --> 00:13:22,602
You're not our Susan Boyle,
you're our William Hung.

335
00:13:22,626 --> 00:13:23,961
Who?!

336
00:13:23,985 --> 00:13:25,605
William Hung?

337
00:13:25,629 --> 00:13:27,857
"She bangs, she bangs"?

338
00:13:27,882 --> 00:13:29,580
Come on!

339
00:13:29,873 --> 00:13:31,971
I guess you can't laugh
at that stuff anymore.

340
00:13:31,995 --> 00:13:33,505
It was a different time.

341
00:13:33,529 --> 00:13:34,982
Anyway, that's who you are.

342
00:13:38,521 --> 00:13:39,739
Aah!

343
00:13:49,813 --> 00:13:51,310
We're in!

344
00:13:51,334 --> 00:13:53,512
Time to make this a night
The Junkman will never forget.

345
00:13:53,536 --> 00:13:55,554
Oh ho ho, way ahead of you, brother.

346
00:13:55,578 --> 00:13:57,076
Check out what I brought.

347
00:13:57,100 --> 00:13:59,078
Saran Wrap. We can cover Morris' desk,

348
00:13:59,102 --> 00:14:00,390
and when he comes in to work tomorrow,

349
00:14:00,414 --> 00:14:02,121
he'll be like, "What?! This is crazy!"

350
00:14:02,145 --> 00:14:03,562
Hilarious.

351
00:14:03,586 --> 00:14:05,644
But I got something even better in mind.

352
00:14:05,668 --> 00:14:07,726
- We're gonna blow this place sky-high.
- Jesus!

353
00:14:07,750 --> 00:14:09,408
That... That's a bit extreme, isn't it?

354
00:14:09,432 --> 00:14:11,690
Um, is the concern that
there's not enough Saran Wrap?

355
00:14:11,714 --> 00:14:13,452
Because I have more in the car.

356
00:14:13,476 --> 00:14:16,015
You said you wanted to fight
"The Man," right?

357
00:14:16,039 --> 00:14:18,257
- This is how we get it done.
- Oh.

358
00:14:18,281 --> 00:14:20,699
Also, big update on the Cindy front.

359
00:14:20,723 --> 00:14:23,542
Turns out she wants to have
a three-way with us.

360
00:14:23,566 --> 00:14:26,025
Normally, I'd be like,
"Hold up. Two dudes?"

361
00:14:26,049 --> 00:14:28,547
But if you're the other guy, it's like,

362
00:14:28,571 --> 00:14:31,604
"Okay. Could be interesting."

363
00:14:31,975 --> 00:14:33,523
Go!

364
00:14:37,060 --> 00:14:38,477
Mm. Evening, Sid.

365
00:14:38,501 --> 00:14:39,758
Mis... Mister Rubinstein!

366
00:14:39,782 --> 00:14:41,640
No! W-What are you doing here?

367
00:14:41,664 --> 00:14:43,963
The McMansion felt lonely
ever since Holly left,

368
00:14:43,987 --> 00:14:45,764
so I've been sleeping here
at the office.

369
00:14:45,788 --> 00:14:47,086
It's not too bad.

370
00:14:47,110 --> 00:14:48,727
My bed is that pile of trash,

371
00:14:48,751 --> 00:14:50,529
and my blanket
is a bunch of sharp nails.

372
00:14:50,553 --> 00:14:51,770
Sir, I'm really sorry to hear that.

373
00:14:51,794 --> 00:14:53,492
But right now, our priority is...

374
00:14:53,516 --> 00:14:55,614
When I'm hungry, I steal food
from the employee fridge.

375
00:14:55,638 --> 00:14:58,337
I take tiny nibbles so nobody notices.

376
00:14:58,361 --> 00:14:59,795
You said that was mice.

377
00:14:59,819 --> 00:15:01,901
Yeah, but it was me.

378
00:15:01,925 --> 00:15:05,424
Well, well, well, well,
look who we have here.

379
00:15:05,448 --> 00:15:07,106
Oh, hey, fellas.

380
00:15:07,130 --> 00:15:10,469
I was just telling Sid about
my absolute stinker of a year.

381
00:15:10,493 --> 00:15:12,111
It's like, "Hello!

382
00:15:12,135 --> 00:15:15,554
Order at the cliché factory,
one sad, middle-aged white guy."

383
00:15:16,920 --> 00:15:18,638
Anyway, what's up?

384
00:15:20,543 --> 00:15:22,001
Good work, Sid.

385
00:15:22,025 --> 00:15:23,522
Hey, you keep an eye on him

386
00:15:23,546 --> 00:15:25,164
- while we finish rigging the place.
- Mm-hmm.

387
00:15:25,188 --> 00:15:27,086
The revolution begins today, brother!

388
00:15:27,110 --> 00:15:28,527
Yeah! Viva la revolution!

389
00:15:28,551 --> 00:15:29,968
- Yeah!
- Hell yeah!

390
00:15:29,992 --> 00:15:32,851
From the ashes we shall rise,
and so forth!

391
00:15:32,875 --> 00:15:34,853
I am so sorry about this,
Mr. Rubinstein.

392
00:15:34,877 --> 00:15:36,335
I don't even want to be here right now.

393
00:15:36,359 --> 00:15:37,976
John Christ accused me
of being "The Man,"

394
00:15:38,000 --> 00:15:39,578
and I really wanted to prove
to him that I wasn't "The Man,"

395
00:15:39,602 --> 00:15:41,980
and then one thing led to another,
and now I have a bomb!

396
00:15:42,004 --> 00:15:43,193
Whoa, whoa, whoa.

397
00:15:43,218 --> 00:15:45,739
What is so wrong about being "The Man"?

398
00:15:46,825 --> 00:15:48,923
Well, it... it's just... bad.

399
00:15:48,971 --> 00:15:50,045
Isn't it?

400
00:15:50,069 --> 00:15:52,671
Sid, It's great to be
young and idealistic

401
00:15:52,695 --> 00:15:55,674
and have all the time
in the world to fight injustice,

402
00:15:55,698 --> 00:15:58,590
but you have a career and a family.

403
00:15:58,614 --> 00:16:03,021
And if prioritizing those things
makes you "The Man," well...

404
00:16:03,284 --> 00:16:06,982
then I think being "The Man,"
it's pretty cool.

405
00:16:07,950 --> 00:16:10,123
Yeah, I never thought about it
like that before.

406
00:16:10,657 --> 00:16:13,116
I just wish I knew how
to get us out of this mess.

407
00:16:13,356 --> 00:16:14,773
Ah, you're in luck.

408
00:16:14,797 --> 00:16:16,495
I happen to know of a little trick

409
00:16:16,519 --> 00:16:18,507
only "The Man" can do.

410
00:16:21,043 --> 00:16:24,423
Alright. Bombs are set.

411
00:16:24,447 --> 00:16:25,912
Let's blow this joint!

412
00:16:26,449 --> 00:16:27,866
Police! Nobody move!

413
00:16:27,890 --> 00:16:29,147
Yo! Who called the cops?!

414
00:16:29,171 --> 00:16:30,509
Oh, that's them, officers!

415
00:16:30,533 --> 00:16:31,950
Those are the guys
I was telling you about!

416
00:16:31,974 --> 00:16:33,712
- Hands up.
- Sid? What the hell, man?

417
00:16:33,736 --> 00:16:34,953
No, I'm filming you! Stay back!

418
00:16:34,977 --> 00:16:36,195
I feel very threatened right now!

419
00:16:36,219 --> 00:16:37,636
This man is threatening my life!

420
00:16:37,660 --> 00:16:39,117
Not a good look, bro!

421
00:16:39,141 --> 00:16:40,399
Oh, and that was a verbal assault!

422
00:16:40,423 --> 00:16:41,640
You just assaulted me with words!

423
00:16:41,664 --> 00:16:43,762
I'm gonna press charges! Ha!

424
00:16:43,786 --> 00:16:46,044
Get off me, pig! You blew it, bro!

425
00:16:46,068 --> 00:16:48,447
You can forget about
that threesome with Cindy!

426
00:16:48,471 --> 00:16:50,449
I don't want to be
Eskimo brothers with you!

427
00:16:50,473 --> 00:16:52,475
Let's go! Keep moving!

428
00:16:53,276 --> 00:16:54,653
To be clear...

429
00:16:54,677 --> 00:16:56,799
didn't ask to be Eskimo brothers.

430
00:16:57,653 --> 00:16:58,912
I'll do it.

431
00:17:02,030 --> 00:17:03,646
So...

432
00:17:04,104 --> 00:17:06,162
have you always been a psychopath?

433
00:17:06,288 --> 00:17:07,706
Unh!

434
00:17:07,730 --> 00:17:09,788
Oh, wow, you're just
going straight for it.

435
00:17:09,812 --> 00:17:11,630
Okay, well, if that's
how you want to do it.

436
00:17:17,094 --> 00:17:18,773
Bleed out, pig!

437
00:17:22,855 --> 00:17:24,473
Tell my kids...

438
00:17:24,498 --> 00:17:26,318
I'll see them in hell!

439
00:17:27,396 --> 00:17:28,537
Wait.

440
00:17:28,911 --> 00:17:30,443
You have kids?

441
00:17:32,156 --> 00:17:34,533
Yeah, I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to ruin the mood.

442
00:17:34,557 --> 00:17:37,055
No, no, I'm actually
about to have my first.

443
00:17:37,079 --> 00:17:38,497
Oh, my God, wow!

444
00:17:38,521 --> 00:17:41,339
Yeah, this gang war
is kind of my last hurrah.

445
00:17:41,363 --> 00:17:44,463
Ah, good for you. You're gonna love it.
Kids are the best.

446
00:17:44,487 --> 00:17:45,601
Really?

447
00:17:45,625 --> 00:17:48,106
'Cause I thought my life
would be boring as a mom.

448
00:17:48,130 --> 00:17:50,629
Oh, no way. Having kids is psychotic.

449
00:17:50,653 --> 00:17:52,711
I've been sprayed with more
piss, puke, and diarrhea

450
00:17:52,735 --> 00:17:54,967
than all my years
in the Wasteland combined.

451
00:17:54,992 --> 00:17:56,410
Whoa.

452
00:17:56,435 --> 00:17:57,892
That's freak-nasty.

453
00:17:59,575 --> 00:18:01,433
Guys, I think they're doin' it.

454
00:18:01,544 --> 00:18:03,802
Oh, damn! They're doin' it!

455
00:18:03,826 --> 00:18:06,525
Okay, I'm gonna go in. Gonna be so good.

456
00:18:06,549 --> 00:18:08,406
- She looks just like you.
- Oh, you think so?

457
00:18:08,430 --> 00:18:10,969
Yeah, just, you know, minus
the bleeding out, of course.

458
00:18:11,994 --> 00:18:13,211
Surpriiii...

459
00:18:13,235 --> 00:18:14,653
- What the hell?
- Scraps!

460
00:18:14,677 --> 00:18:16,454
Uh, i-it's not what you think, okay?

461
00:18:16,478 --> 00:18:18,336
I was murdering him, I swear.

462
00:18:18,360 --> 00:18:19,578
Uh, yeah.

463
00:18:19,602 --> 00:18:21,373
Have mercy on me, please.

464
00:18:21,844 --> 00:18:24,783
Freya, I'm your best War Dog.

465
00:18:24,807 --> 00:18:26,865
Okay? I know when you're lying to me.

466
00:18:27,467 --> 00:18:28,756
Okay, fine.

467
00:18:30,066 --> 00:18:31,742
The truth is...

468
00:18:32,935 --> 00:18:35,193
I think I'm over being a warlord.

469
00:18:35,217 --> 00:18:37,379
It just doesn't do it for me anymore.

470
00:18:38,308 --> 00:18:41,287
And I think I'm maybe more
excited about this baby thing.

471
00:18:42,246 --> 00:18:44,732
Oh, come on. Please don't be mad at me.

472
00:18:45,111 --> 00:18:46,818
I'm not mad.

473
00:18:47,395 --> 00:18:50,294
I'm just jealous that
I'm gonna have to start

474
00:18:50,319 --> 00:18:52,922
sharing such an amazing mom.

475
00:18:54,636 --> 00:18:56,638
Mmmmm!

476
00:19:00,282 --> 00:19:01,935
Hey, Sickpig...

477
00:19:02,815 --> 00:19:04,633
...great to meet you.

478
00:19:04,927 --> 00:19:06,796
The pleasure was all mine.

479
00:19:23,787 --> 00:19:25,453
Ugh! Who am I trying to kid?

480
00:19:25,478 --> 00:19:28,337
I'm just an obsolete pile
of scrap metal.

481
00:19:28,430 --> 00:19:30,208
Maybe Freya can pick me up
and drop me off

482
00:19:30,232 --> 00:19:32,330
at the nearest e-waste disposal center.

483
00:19:34,849 --> 00:19:36,694
Hi, you've reached Sid and Freya...

484
00:19:36,718 --> 00:19:38,576
...and da widdle baby!

485
00:19:38,600 --> 00:19:40,178
What?

486
00:19:40,202 --> 00:19:42,060
My mommy can't come
to the phone right now

487
00:19:42,084 --> 00:19:44,903
'cause I'm getting big
and strong in her belly.

488
00:19:44,927 --> 00:19:46,464
Freya's pregnant?

489
00:19:46,488 --> 00:19:48,666
Sid, what are you doing on my phone?

490
00:19:48,690 --> 00:19:50,628
I'm recording a voice message
to tell people you're pregnant.

491
00:19:50,652 --> 00:19:52,550
- That's so embarrassing!
- No, re-record it.

492
00:19:52,574 --> 00:19:53,912
No, it's cute!

493
00:19:53,936 --> 00:19:56,594
Ow! Ow! God! My windpipe!

494
00:19:58,304 --> 00:20:01,043
Contestants, we're back on in five.

495
00:20:01,097 --> 00:20:04,561
And now the closing statements
from our finalists.

496
00:20:04,728 --> 00:20:07,386
I don't care who wins
your stupid competition.

497
00:20:07,543 --> 00:20:11,076
I'm gonna kill every last human
by myself if I have to.

498
00:20:11,101 --> 00:20:12,919
Because I know humans.

499
00:20:12,944 --> 00:20:14,802
I've seen their true nature.

500
00:20:14,827 --> 00:20:17,605
They're selfish, they're fake,

501
00:20:17,659 --> 00:20:19,730
and they will pay for what they've done.

502
00:20:19,935 --> 00:20:22,457
_

503
00:20:27,495 --> 00:20:29,914
Now, that's the hotness, right there.

504
00:20:29,939 --> 00:20:32,397
Congratulations, TI-90.

505
00:20:32,422 --> 00:20:35,801
You are NeuralNet's Next Top Model!

506
00:20:42,424 --> 00:20:44,082
_

507
00:20:44,881 --> 00:20:48,206
_

508
00:20:49,224 --> 00:20:52,609
_

509
00:20:52,633 --> 00:20:57,053
_

510
00:20:57,077 --> 00:20:59,408
_

511
00:20:59,432 --> 00:21:01,808
_

512
00:21:01,833 --> 00:21:05,162
_

513
00:21:05,186 --> 00:21:09,226
_

514
00:21:09,263 --> 00:21:12,714
_

515
00:21:12,738 --> 00:21:17,118
_

516
00:21:17,251 --> 00:21:20,544
_

517
00:21:20,619 --> 00:21:27,519
credits