Previously on This Is Us...
Congratulations. You're officially six weeks along.
- We're pregnant. - Oh, that's wonderful!
- I'm glad you're happy. - Oh, I'm not happy!
I'm ecstatic! I'm a... I'm aquiver!
I want to put on my happy song, and I'm gonna be all...
No, no, don't. 'Cause this might not happen.
- In fact, it probably won't happen. - What?
I'm 37.
And because of my weight, you know...
You don't want to jinx things.
Not about jinxing.
This is about hope that it doesn't turn disastrous.
Randall, I need to tell you something.
It's okay.
I already know.
Kate lost the baby.
Number One has done it.
- Number One has done it! - Yes!
And now the crowd...
the crowd moves its attention to the filly!
- Oh, come on, sweetheart. - Come on, sweetheart.
- Come on, Number Two. Come on. - Come on, Number Two.
Come to us just like your brother did. Come on.
- That and straight forward. - Think she's ready?
I think she's ready. Here she comes.
- Come on, Kate. - She's a tough girl.
I know. She's a fighter.
She's a fighter. She's gonna do it.
Chris, before we talk about this game, let's talk about
the game in four nights when we go to Washington
for the big Thanksgiving night game.
I know these look like candy,
but they're actually prenatal vitamins.
Oh, my God.
Your daddy tried to buy prenatal Flintstone Vitamins,
but they don't make them.
I think he really identifies with
Fred's whole "Yabba dabba doo" philosophy.
You know, you work hard, you play hard.
? Need my vitamins ?
? 'Cause your mommy's trying to keep you strong ?
? Baby in the oven ?
? Mommy's sorry for this stupid song. ?
Mm. Don't say "stupid," say "silly."
It's not nice.
synced and corrected by susinz *www.addic7ed.com*
Jack! Fuse!
Yup, I'm working on it!
It's okay, Louie. Okay?
Dad'll get the lights back on in a sec.
Just don't panic pee, okay?
Good boy. See? That's a good boy.
And you're panic peeing.
All right, yeah, great.
Come on. Come on, Louie.
Did Louie pee again?
- Yes, Mom. I'm dealing with it. - Killing me.
Sorry to have interrupted your evening, my liege.
Why does it smell like an orange threw up in here?
It's the Bundt cake that I made for Kevin's interview tonight.
I think I maybe overdid it with the orange zest.
- Oh. - There's a game every Friday.
- Oh, thank God. - Fixed it!
Good job, babe.
- W-Wait, is that what you're wearing? - Mm-hmm.
The coach from Pitt is gonna be here any second.
You should really stop borrowing shirts from Sophie, Kevin.
Mm. I don't really think
the coach is gonna care what shirt I'm wearing.
- Whatever, Crop Top. - Ew. What is that flavor?
Kate! Can you clean his pee anywhere else?
A college coach is gonna be sitting on that couch.
Okay, well, I'm not getting it on anything.
And, uh, speaking of college, have you made your list yet?
Didn't the guidance counselor say
to make a list of your top five schools?
'Cause you don't want to put all your eggs in...
In one basket? Yes, I know what she said.
Okay.
I have, like, a month to decide, Mom.
Yeah, but a month?
That'll go by like that.
If you want, I can sit down and we can go through that
- whole college book together? - I'm good.
Just a list of five schools.
That's all I ask.
- Fine. - Okay.
He's here!
Okay! Okay, okay.
I'm out.
- Hey, knock 'em dead. - Train your dog.
Make that list.
Uh, this looks like a Shamrock Shake,
and it sounds like a Shamrock Shake,
but I'm guessing it does not taste like a Shamrock Shake.
How do you spell "Kundalini"?
Uh, I have no idea what that is,
so I clearly have no idea how to spell it.
But I'm guessing that it is an expensive powder
that you want me to start adding to your pregnancy shakes.
- No. It's a type of yoga. - Huh.
And I want to ask the doctor if she recommends it.
- Aha. - Right.
I always have so many questions
- before the baby appointments. - Yeah.
Right? And then I finally get in that room,
and it's like an alien abduction.
Like everything just flies out of my head.
- So I'm writing all the questions down. - Okay.
All right. Oh, oh, make sure that you ask, uh,
"When will the baby move?" so that I can say,
- "Hopefully, as soon as he turns 18." - "As soon as he turns 18."
- Yeah. - Or she.
- Yeah. Uh, joke still works. - Yeah. Okay.
But I think you've worn that one out, Tobe.
Never.
All right.
What else, what else, what else you got?
Okay. Um...
"Are my HCG levels doubling every 48 hours?"
"And why is my pee green?"
- It's not the smoothie. - Could be the smoothie.
- It might be the smoothie. - Yeah.
Okay, and then also,
"If I take a hot bath, will it burn the baby?"
- Oh! Which reminds me. - Yeah.
The Swedish baby bath that we ordered is coming.
- Yes! - Um, and they said
that it fits most tubs but not all tubs.
Do you think it's gonna fit our tub?
I have no idea.
Okay.
Where you going?
- To measure the tub. - Okay. All right.
I'm gonna see what else you got here.
All right, "How much does childbirth hurt?"
I do not think you want to know the answer to that one.
"Do they make knit caps for feet
'cause I'm outgrowing all my socks?"
Uh, "Will the smell of my fiancé's head
make me gag the whole nine months?"
Okay, well, this list just took a turn for the hurtful.
Toby!
What?! What?!
I know how difficult this is,
but the good news is is that you got pregnant,
which means that you can try again as soon as four weeks.
Now, you passed most of the tissue at home,
so there's no need to put you through the procedure of a D&C.
I want you to expect bleeding anywhere from five to 14 days.
Otherwise, there's no reason
you can't go back to living your life.
I'll give you two some time alone.
Okay. Thanks.
Did you hear that?
She said that we could try again, so...
It's all right.
I want to get dressed.
Uh, yeah, okay.
Ah, Kevin.
Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man?
No. Portrait of a Young Man Plucking Art.
Hey. What do you think?
I think you're a little overdressed for a day of
watching classic sitcoms and trying not to cry.
Oh. No.
I have my lunch gig. Remember?
We have that run-through an hour before and...
- Pinot. Downtown? Yeah. - Yeah, yeah.
No, I'm familiar with the job, I just...
Hey, I-I thought you would've canceled that.
You know, it's only been, like, 12 hours.
Doesn't matter. If I bail last-minute,
Peter's never gonna call me for gigs.
Hey, come here.
Just come sit with me, and we'll watch
I Love Lucy and maybe some Good Times.
I have to go to work.
Okay. Well, then I'll take you.
Wait. My Uber's almost here, so...
Kate. Kate, Kate, Kate. This is insane.
- What? - We just had a miscarriage.
Thanks. I know.
I was there.
Okay.
Um, can I, can I pick you up, afterwards?
Sure. Uh, should be done around 3:30.
- Okay. - I'll see you soon.
All right, yeah. 3:30.
- Proud of you. - Okay, bud, let's hit the road.
Off to college already.
Oh, great. Here we go.
It's just a tour, Ma.
- Still have a year of high school. - I know.
All right, so we're gonna see you guys after Kev's game?
- Yes. - Dad, come on. It's a four-hour drive.
I don't want to get there late and make a bad impression.
Randall, you're a math prodigy
with insane SAT scores and perfect grades.
Any college would be lucky to have a giant dork like you.
Thanks, LL Cool K.
- Mm. See ya. - So, you guys out?
- You could've knocked. - I did.
You didn't answer.
- We're having a serious talk? - No. No.
Mom, every time you sit on my bed, it's a serious talk.
I just thought it must be tough...
Classic start to one of your serious talks.
Will you just zip it, please?
And sit down.
I recognize that I may be a little bit dense
about all this college stuff.
You have two brothers who know
exactly what they want to do with their life.
Kevin's gonna go play football somewhere,
and Randall is gonna go major in some math thing
that none of us can understand.
But you aren't your brothers.
You're not.
You don't know what your path is just yet.
And you know what?
I think that's okay.
At your age, it's great.
Keep your options open.
You go to some incredible liberal arts college,
and you can study a bunch of different subjects
until you figure out what you're passionate about.
Wow, Mom.
Didn't realize you thought I was passionless until now.
- So, thanks for that. - No, no.
- That's not what I was saying, Kate. - Yeah.
Sweetheart, you know that's not what I was saying.
No, I got to get to school, so I'll see you at Kevin's game.
Bye, Louie. Be a good boy, okay?
Hey, why don't you go to, uh, veterinary school?
What are we gonna do with her, Louie? Huh?
What? What are we gonna do?
Oh.
Hi. This is Kate Emily Pearson.
Um... my audition song is "Summertime."
I really want to go to Berklee, so I really hope you like it.
Anyway, um... here goes.
? Summertime ?
? And the livin' is easy ?
? Fish are jumping ?
? And the cotton is high ?
? Oh, your daddy's rich ?
? And your ma is good-lookin' ?
? So hush, little baby ?
? Don't you cry ?
? One of these mornings ?
? You're gonna rise up singin' ?
? You'll spread your wings ?
? And you'll take to the sky ?
? Ooh, but till that morning ?
? Ain't nothing can harm you ?
- Oh, you got to be kidding me. - ? With Daddy and Mammy ?
? Standin' by ?
? So hush, little baby ?
? Don't you cry ?
? So hush, little baby ?
? Don't ?
? You cry. ?
Uh, excuse me.
Uh, my good man, uh, I'm trying to prevent a package
from being delivered to my apartment.
I called, they said it might be here.
I have a tracking number.
Yeah, I don't know what they told you,
but this isn't like a customer service deal.
It's a distro center. Can't help you. Sorry.
Hey. What's your name?
- Karl. - Hi, Karl.
Uh, I am a large and powerful man.
And on most days, my stature is only a complement
to my sharp comedic wit.
But today, I am a man with a fiancée
who has had a terrible last 12 hours.
Right now, she's somewhere in a red dress
singing in the middle of the day
because she can't face how awful she feels.
And that breaks my heart.
So I'm not feeling all that funny.
Okay, buddy, it ain't personal.
- I just got... - The hardest part, Karl,
about seeing someone you love in pain
is not being able to do anything about it,
except try not to make it worse.
Which brings me here, to intercept a package
that, were it to arrive on our doorstep,
would most certainly make it worse.
I am a large and powerful man, Karl.
And I don't know how much longer I can stay this calm.
Okay, it's not on a truck. Not yet.
But I can't tell you where it is.
Could be anywhere in here.
Where do I start?
Your poppy seed is now the size of a lentil.
Congratulations. You're officially six weeks along.
We're pregnant.
- Oh, that's wonderful! - I'm glad you're happy.
Oh, I'm not happy!
I'm ecstatic!
We're pregnant.
You're preg...?
- We're pregnant! - Oh, my God!
This is amazing!
Defense! Defense!
- Milk Dud? - No, thank you.
Defense! Defense!
Hike!
Go, go, go, go, go!
Break it! Break it! Break it!
Yeah, Kev!
Another first down for number one.
That's three in a row on his own, folks.
Go!
- $50? - Mm-hmm.
Yeah, it's for your application fee.
You went through my stuff?
No, I...
I...
Okay, yeah, I did a little bit. Sorry.
Yeah, great. Maybe I should use this $50
to put a new lock on my door.
Okay. I'm sorry.
I shouldn't have gone through your stuff, Kate,
but I didn't really have a choice.
You've been so closed off to me.
I mean, why wouldn't you tell me?
Huh?
Bug, I had no idea
that you were even interested in singing again.
Well, I am.
I could've helped you.
Yeah. I know.
Well, I thought you sounded terrific.
I did.
I mean, the song selection was perfect.
Really highlighted your vocal range.
Thanks.
Well, I think you have a real shot.
I do.
Oh, my God, it's Kevin.
Is that Kevin?
Okay, go call your father.
- Yeah. - Find a phone, page him.
- Okay, Mom. - Go, go, go.
- Kate, Kate, go. - Excuse me, I'm so sorry.
Sorry, man. This is the last section it could be in.
Hey, uh, you said Kate Pearson, right?
Is this it?
Yeah. That appears to be it.
Thank you.
- Just sign right there. - Yeah.
- Glad I could help. - Yeah.
- You have a good day. - Yeah, you, too.
Uh, uh, Karl, do you have a, uh, baby at home?
Uh, no.
But my sister's actually due for her third any-any day now.
You like her?
Okay. You know what?
Why don't you give it to her anyways.
It's a fancy baby bath.
Fits in most tubs.
Anyway, so, you want it?
- Yeah, sure. Thanks. - Yeah.
I'm sorry if something happened.
Yeah.
Hey. Where's Kate?
I've been double-parked outside for 20 minutes.
She's not answering my calls.
Oh, she took off a couple hours ago.
She got sick in the middle of set or something.
What-what do you mean she got sick?
I don't know.
I'm sorry. I figured she just went home.
Okay. Uh... yep. Okay.
Leave a message for Kate.
Uh, hey, I'm here at the cafe.
Uh, they said that you left early, that you got sick.
Uh, where are you? Please, please, please call me.
Okay, bye.
Hey, it's Kevin. Leave a message. Or better yet, send a text.
Tobe?
- Yeah? - Hi, honey.
I've been trying to get ahold of you.
What's... Are you okay?
I lost the baby, Mom.
Don't say anything.
I just want to tell you so you know
and it can be over.
- Oh, Bug. - Okay?
- Is there anything that I can... - Look, I got to go, Mom.
Okay. Just... I don't know what to...
Hey, it's Kevin. Leave a message. Or better yet, send a text.
K...
Hey.
Thank God.
Are you okay?
Yeah, I'm fine.
You're fine.
What the, uh, what the hell happened?
You knew I was picking you up.
I'm s... I'm sorry.
I should have called. I...
Yeah, I thought you were in a hospital or something.
- Oh, okay. Well, I wasn't. - Yeah, I can see that.
Where were you?
I was walking.
'Kay. Walking where?
Oh, my... I just was walking, Tobe.
Okay?
- What? - No. No, it is not okay.
I was driving around like some nut job looking for you.
Oh, I'm sorry. Were you put out?
Did you have a couple of emotional hours?
'Cause I'm going to be a raging hormone machine for weeks
while my body still thinks it's pregnant.
So that's fun.
Okay, let's not... let's not do this.
- Oh, no. - This is...
Let's do this. I think we should do this.
Let's just go big.
'Cause that's how you like to do things, right?
- What's that supposed to mean? - Nothing.
No, no, no. Go ahead, Kate, say it.
What is that supposed to mean?
It means...
that I wanted to be cautious about this.
I didn't want to get excited.
- But you... - Okay. Okay.
You pushed and you pushed.
So, congratulations, Toby.
You got me excited.
Yeah, well, I'm not gonna apologize about being excited.
- Okay. - We didn't lose the baby
because we got our hopes up.
- Right. - All right? It just happened.
Toby, it happened to me.
It didn't happen to you.
When I woke up this morning, I forgot for a split second.
I was just looking at you and thinking, "Wow.
She's having our baby."
And then I blinked, and I remembered.
And I slid out of bed as quietly as possible
because I thought that if there was a chance that maybe
you were dreaming and forgetting, too...
well, I didn't want to wake you from that.
Now, I will be your entire support system
through all of this.
I will hold your head in my lap, and I will stroke your hair,
and I will tell you that everything is gonna be okay
until the cows come home.
But what I will not do... what is not fair for you to do
is to tell me that I wasn't a part of this.
Now, yeah, it didn't happen to my body.
I get that.
I have no idea what that must be like for you.
And I'm trying to be strong here 'cause that's the gig,
but it happened to me, too.
And it hurt.
Perfectly comfortable like this.
So am I.
Shouldn't we have gotten, like, an update by now?
Yeah, apparently MRIs take quite a while.
At least the coffee's cold.
Mom.
I'm sorry I didn't tell you about Berklee.
It's just...
you know, if I don't get in...
I think it'll crush me.
But...
but I just could not deal with
disappointing you on top of that.
Bug, for the record,
I would be disappointed for you, not for me.
Yeah. Sometimes it's hard to feel the difference.
My mom was tough.
I mean, you know that. You've seen it.
She was just a...
closed steel door.
And even if you could get through,
there was a room full of spikes right behind it.
And I always wanted to have a daughter,
because I wanted to do it a different way.
I wanted to be the mom that had her...
arms wide open, just waiting for you to fall in if you needed it.
And, somehow...
I don't know...
we just never got there, did we?
- Mom... - No, no, no, no, no. No.
It's not your job to make me feel better.
It's not. It's my job.
It's my job to keep standing there with my arms wide open,
waiting for you to maybe someday
fall inside if you needed it.
And if you do, I'll love you.
And if you don't,
I'll love you, too.
Because that's what it means to be a parent.
You'll see one day.
- They're doing an MRI. - Okay.
It's his knee.
Tobe?
Did you forget your keys, Tobe?
I'm here.
I'm right here.
I can't take a shower. There's no curtain.
I can draw you a bath.
Can you just come sit with me for a minute?
Yeah, of course.
How can I be this sad?
I never even met the baby.
And never held him.
Or her.
Wasn't even old enough for me to know.
I never held Kyle.
I remember they asked me if I wanted to
because it helps, um...
mothers with, um... closure.
You know, to hold the baby and to say good-bye.
But I didn't want to do that because I felt like
if I didn't hold him, somehow it would lessen the pain,
which wasn't the case, obviously, because I...
I knew him already.
He was so real to me.
I mean, the second I found out I was pregnant with you guys,
you were all so real to me.
And then the wondering set in.
You know, did I do this?
Did I do something wrong?
Did I... sleep on the wrong side?
Should I have gone on that walk?
'Cause the day you guys were born,
I went on this long, hot walk.
It wasn't your fault.
And this wasn't yours.
But with me, it's different.
- Because maybe it was... - Maybe it...?
Maybe it was my fault.
Maybe it wasn't.
I know, but I feel like I just took this from Toby.
Yeah, but you didn't.
I know, but...
but it feels that way, if that makes any sense.
You need to talk to him, sweetheart.
You have to share all this.
I mean, you know,
I held my grief from your father for weeks.
I thought it would hurt him to see how sad I was.
Did I ever tell you that story about going to the grocery store
with you guys when you were...
six weeks old?
Your father and I hadn't had a real meal
in a long time, and I really wanted to make him
this beer and rump roast
that I had seen on The Galloping Gourmet.
And it required a bag of yellow onions.
Oh.
Hey.
Oh.
Sorr... That...
- Those were my onions. - I'm sorry?
Those were my onions. You just took them from me.
No, I got them from the display right here.
Yeah, I under...
Excuse me, where are you going, lady?
Those were my onions, and you took them from me.
- I want them back. - What are you, crazy?
No, I'm not crazy. I want my onions!
- You're crazy. - Is there a problem here?
Yeah, I... Yes.
Okay, there is a problem.
Um...
I went to go grab that bag of onions.
I turn my back for two seconds to look after my babies,
and that woman took them from me.
- Ma'am, just calm down. - I-I'm calm, okay?
I'm not gonna calm down though, because what I want
is for you to tell her to give me my onions back, okay?
I-I...
I have a recipe that calls for four ounces of yellow onion.
And-and I've been planning this dish for a whole week,
and I'm not gonna leave here without my yellow onion.
Miss, would you like to sit down?
No, I don't, I don't... I don't want to sit down.
I want you to tell her to give me my onion back.
I just, I want...
I want what I came for, okay?
I want my yellow onion. I want what's fair.
Will you, will you, will you tell her
to give me my onion back? Because it's not fair
that I have to sit here and go without my yellow onion.
It's not fair.
It's not fair! It's not fair!
You unleashed holy hell on some unsuspecting lady?
I did.
- Mom. - Yeah.
And then I ended up going home and burning the pot roast.
- No. - Yeah.
But...
eventually, I opened up to your dad.
And that's what gave space in my heart
for you and Kevin.
And it made space in my heart for Randall, too.
Yeah, a little too much for Randall, if you ask me.
Seriously?
No.
I'm kidding. Sorry.
'Cause I love you more than I can bear, Bug.
I love you, too.
Talk to Toby.
All right, you guys, um...
you guys wait with your brother, okay?
Your mom and I are gonna go get the car.
- Okay. - Pull it around, okay?
Can you get me something to drink?
Sure.
Thank you.
Hi.
Oh, hi.
My mom came.
I see that.
I am...
gonna go grab some coffee at that place around the corner.
- Hi. - Hi.
- Want to sit with me? - Yeah.
What, uh... what were you...?
- Come here. - Oh.
Oh. Okay. Yep.
- Just go with it. - Okay.
This is sweet, but I-I really think
this is more your thing than mine.
- So why don't... Can we... - Okay.
- Can we switch? Okay. - Okay. Yeah.
- Oh, yeah, that's the stuff. - Yeah.
I feel like I failed you.
Mm.
You didn't.
You never could.
I want to try again.
Not yet.
But maybe soon.
Yeah, me, too.
Whenever you're ready.
We will not let this break us.
No, we will not.
I love you.
My God.
Come here.
Hey, Randall.
Randall, give your sister some space.
Come on, Number Three!
Okay, Number Three, it's your turn.
synced and corrected by susinz *www.addic7ed.com*