I don' t like the way I feel.
I want you to fix that.
Hélène is as clueless as we are
about who sits at the top of The Twelve.
She's young, she's green, but she has potential.
I need her ready to work quickly.
I murdered my brother.
There's been another attack.
A Russian agent in Cuba.
Well, they must be a member of The Twelve.
I should've done this when we first met.
Done what?
I rose to your challenge.
When are you free?
Now.
? There were no candles lit The room was dark as night
? Just like the corners of my mind
? I gave my heart to her
? She has my heart
? I rose to kiss her But the flower fell apart
? Fire glistened And tore me apart ?
? "Where does love go?" she said ?
Hello?
? I said, "Wherever you are"
This is all quite creepy.
You brought me all the way across town for this?
Hi, Eve.
I want my phone call!
CREDITS
So...
When does the show start?
I own this.
Really?
My Dad used to bring me to pantomimes here when I was a kid.
I loved it so much.
So he bought it for me.
Of course he did.
Well, shall we talk business now?
Yeah.
So...
the name?
Lars Meier.
He must be a big deal, he was really hard to find.
Fernanda seems lovely, by the way.
Ah, she's an idiot.
Oh see, you didn't play her right.
I would have gotten her to lead me to Lars.
I didn't say I was looking for him.
But see, here's what I can't figure out.
Why would you need to go through his ex
to track him down?
Unless you don't know who he is?
- Do you not know who he is? - My, my...
Your brain, it's like a hamster on a wheel.
It must be exhausting.
On the subject of exes, I hear you've had a busy night.
You got her arrested? Wow! I'm impressed.
Stop!
Fine.
It is Lars.
I'll race you.
Let's see who can find him first.
? Whatever you do Don't blow your cool
? You never know What'll happen to you
? Never get mad
? Don't even quarrel Don't blow your cool
Should I come in?
Yes.
? Don't get annoyed
Come in.
So this is where you'll be staying.
I expect you to be contactable 24 hours a day.
I call, you run. Get it?
Yeah. Just so you know,
we're not friends, don't ever think we are.
- Okay. - Good, sit.
So, tell me about yourself.
What do you want to know?
What are you good at?
Embalming.
- Embalming? - Yeah.
That's great.
Let's make this simple. Have you ever killed?
Once.
A real pro.
This is your new phone and keys.
Get settled and meet me at the end of the pier in an hour.
Look what the cat dragged in.
- I'm drunk by the way. - Oh, I can smell.
- Hey, guess what? - What?
Hélène doesn't know what Lars looks like.
But we do.
What?
7,432.
That is how many social media posts this woman has,
and I trawled through every single one of them.
This is the only picture of them together, anywhere.
- Damn you're good. - I know.
Can we do facial recognition?
Yeah, but, please have a heart, let me eat something first.
- All right. - Yeah!
Surprise!
I just need a minute, thank you.
It's good to see you, Villanelle.
You look well, all things considered.
So, have you got all this...
out of your system?
Yes. Shall we go?
What should I do?
I could try to intimidate you,
but that doesn't work.
I could stroke your ego, but you know it all, already.
Or I could offer you more money, but you don't care about that.
So, I'll just go for honesty.
No one leaves The Twelve.
- Not you, not me... - Wrong.
I want more money,
lots more.
Can we go?
Yeah.
Your timing is impeccable as ever.
This, this is a sensitive one.
Fine.
Heathrow please, Luis.
_
Hi.
At least you're punctual.
No, no, no, I want you to go and push her in.
What do you mean?
Push the woman in the sea.
Why?
She hasn't done anything.
There is no why, there's only do.
Go, push her in.
No.
Yes!
Are you wasting my time?
Do you want this job?
Or do you want to be a nobody?
Are you stupid?
For God's sake, answer me!
Go home.
_
Look, is that him?
Wait, that's him, right? Older now, but...
Yeah, that's gotta be him.
AnniePixieXOXO is selling this picture for 17 euros.
"Der Revolutionaire, Eugenie Allard. Berlin, 1979."
Eugenie Allard. "A photographer
most noted for her shots during the Cold War."
Can you get a phone number?
Yeah.
Oui?
Hello, do you speak English?
Unfortunately.
Fantastic. I saw your listing online for Der Revolutionaire,
it's such a beautiful image. Might you know who the subject is?
Nope.
All right.
Do you have any more photographs of this gentleman?
Probably. I don't know.
Do you think you could have a look?
Do you think I have a bag of time?
Either place a bid or come.
Good to see you awake.
I am sorry about the cuffs.
I'd love a cigar.
Evidently the FSB is aware that you're a member of The Twelve.
So I need the names of your contacts.
How about that cigar?
Be a dear.
Good girl.
You know your way around the cigar.
Sometimes, a cigar is just a cigar.
I'll die before I grovel to a woman!
Well now that was silly, wasn't it?
There's something niggling at me.
Andreas went to all that trouble
to get me the position as mayor.
And you just blow it all up to bring it back here
to train up that little idiot nobody.
Are you losing your touch, Konstantin?
I'm just a realist.
There's nothing special about her.
And there's certainly nothing special about me.
So now I'm wondering...
Wondering is above your pay grade.
Just get the job done.
You know what?
I really like my new life.
So how about this?
You put me back on a plane to Russia,
and I keep quiet.
Or, I can call Andreas...
check he knows about whatever it is you're up to.
What?
I know about Paul.
Paul who?
You must remember Paul?
Grey hair, glasses.
You framed him for stealing six million euros from The Twelve?
Yeah, get the job done before The Twelve
find out what a thieving little cockroach you are.
? The wedding moon And I don't want to choose
? Between the black and white
? I don't care
? The storm is coming Lord have mercy
? And I feel the same
If you wanted a cigar, you could have just asked for one.
? I don't care
? I chased the dragon In shiny vision
? And I feel the pain
? I don't care
It's you.
For future reference, I hate surprises.
Is it too late to offer you the job you wanted or...
A wrench?
Come on!
You're more inventive than that. You've always been more inventive.
Even when you were a child.
I often wonder if you remember the first time we met?
You know there was the time in prison, of course, in Russia,
but before that too. At your orphanage,
when you were 9 years old.
I never knew if you remembered that. I liked you instantly.
Let's go! Let's go! High Striker!
Who's got the strongest swing?
Mate! Yes, you! Yeah, I'm looking at you, mate.
Come on!
Oy, do you wanna go?
Yes!
Come on, show us your muscles.
Whoo!
Whoa. My...
What the hell? How'd you do that?
I'm Darren, by the way!
Whoa.
Prove it.
That was not pleasant.
I said prove it.
I'll need some painkillers.
There's some in the glove box.
Good God, Villanelle.
What's happened to you?
I thought you enjoyed all this, at least...
Talk.
You had a bracelet,
a cheap little thing,
with a ballet slipper pendant attached to it.
I remember it because of what you did with it.
There was another girl at the orphanage
who, upset you somehow,
stole your pudding or something.
So, in the middle of the night, while she was sleeping,
you took the bracelet off
and you tied it tightly around her index finger,
so that when she woke up some hours later,
her finger was turning black.
The staff tried to cut it off,
but it was on so tightly they just were slicing flesh.
She lost the finger in the end.
Do you remember that?
When you heard that she had lost the finger...
You asked if you could see it.
I was like this at 9?
You were gifted from birth.
Evil from birth.
You know, humans are like a mezze board.
The best of them have a little bit of everything.
And if you think that your...
flair for murder,
you know, speaks to you a kind of,
lack of humanity, wrong.
Killing is primal. It's what nature intended.
And who are we to quibble with nature?
Why waste your time being good
when you could just be good at what you're good at?
That's what I think anyway.
But what do I know, I've just probably got concussion.
And I'm ravenous.
Fancy a sandwich before you... dash my brains out?
- After you. - No, after you,
I'd rather keep you where I can see you.
Buenas tardes, Benita.
Be careful, she's not house-trained.
- Any peep from next door? - Nothing.
- I need to clean that. - Good idea.
Come. Sit.
I cooked.
Who's that?
It's Benita.
She comes with the house, apparently.
_
Oui?
Are you AnniePixieXOXO?
Let me guess, London Lady.
So lovely to meet you.
If you think this is lovely,
you must have led a sad life.
That's one way of looking at it.
Um, as I mentioned, I'm interested in that
Der Revolutionaire photograph.
Might you know where it was taken or...
My mother took it. She's dead.
Your mother was Eugenie Allard? She's so talented.
She was a pig.
Right.
You said you might have other photographs of him...
Take your pick, la.
Isn't it refreshing?
To eat in silence?
So many people are just bags of gas,
expelling air when they've nothing of any great worth to say.
Just farting from their mouths.
Yeah, exactly.
Good girl.
I like big belly.
It's really good.
Despite being under duress,
I meant what I said.
What?
That we'd make a good team.
So...
Are you going to tell me who sent you?
Don't I get a bribe or something?
Name it, you can have it.
But, I think you'll tell me because you like me.
That's presumptuous.
Hélène.
Hélène?
Is she behind these attacks on The Twelve?
Because I've been tracking attacks on members of The Twelve
and if she's not behind these attacks,
she'd have been grateful to me for trying to save them from some...
torturous murderer.
Torturous?
Yeah. One of them survived.
I have the hideous toad, here, next door.
You should meet him,
it might inspire you.
What happened to him?
Him has a name: Rustem.
His toes were severed and inserted into his nostrils.
Wow.
Nice!
May I?
Who did this?
As yet unknown, but a woman.
A beast!
Not like you, you're a thoroughbred...
Shut up.
Bilious man.
What do you want from him?
Who, why, what, whatever.
Who are his contacts,
why does Hélène want him dead,
what's next. Failing that,
whatever you can get.
Okay.
You can go.
Good.
_
Can I buy these?
What the hell are you doing?
How many toes did she get in there?
- Piss off... - It's just impressive.
What was her name?
Well, it's got me wondering what other...
large things can be inserted into small places.
Cheese wire.
Are you sure you didn't get her name?
_
The left one? Or the right one?
Just kill me if you're going to do it.
Okay...
What did she look like?
Tall!
- She was huge! - And?
She was evil!
Who are your Twelve contacts?
Please, I'll tell you, just stop.
Quickly.
I don't have a name,
- only a place. - A place?
What place?
El Hombre De Dos Caras.
Yes?
I've just been mugged.
What?
Um, they... They got my keys,
my money.
I think I need to go to hospital.
Where are you?
Yes!
That's more like it.
Don't underestimate me.
It would help if we knew what we were looking for.
I don't know.
I hope I know when I know, if you know what I mean?
Let's play truth or dare.
Truth or dare?
Truth!
Are you a born-again Christian?
How do you know everything?
God is good.
Truth or dare?
Truth.
Was it true your dad was a sexy, gay spy?
It's true, Daddy did have a penchant for the penis.
A penchant...
Truth or dare?
Truth.
What intrigues you about Eve?
Well I just met a therapist,
and he said I just like the control I have over her.
Is that true?
It's not not true.
Well, therapists, what do they know?
I mean you just pay them to repeat your questions back at you.
That's what I said!
Truth or dare?
Dare!
Hello?
I thought you were dead.
- Shall I chase him? - Yes.
So, what's the news?
Are you in a rush?
I was about to have a bath.
Pour yourself a drink.
You want to play?
I'll play.
Here.
Why do you do it?
What?
Your job.
I don't like weak women.
I don't want it for myself.
I don't want to see it in others.
So you take vulnerable kids like Pam
and then turn them into your army of...
femme bots.
Femme bots?
Pew, pew, pew...
I take them from their sorry little lives and I give them power.
Who's this all for?
Eve,
you don't know what I do
or what I give to them.
So, tell me.
Sorry.
Um, you know, if you could just, sorry...
Yeah...
This is so uncomfortable.
I made soup.
Do you want some?
I really do.
So how did you know that man?
He was an old flame.
Is he Twelve?
Problem is I've now given him a chance to go to ground.
I think I'd better make tracks.
Berlin,
if you care to join?
I didn't give you a dare.
Go on then.
Do air guitar.
No, that's pointless.
Well, dares are pointless.
The point of them, is to be pointless.
Come on.
What, you look like you're stroking a tiny gerbil, don't do that.
Give me more.
I need much more.
Yes.
That was...
That was amazing.
Ridiculous.
Goodbye, Villanelle. Be good.
Carolyn?
I'm sorry I tried to kill you.
That guy is lazy.
He's going home this week.
I haven't told you the news.
I got Villanelle out.
She's free.
What?
I thought you'd want to know.
Do you know what passion is?
People think it's sex, excitement.
But the actual definition of passion is to suffer.
That's what it is about Villanelle, isn't it?
You love this, don't you?
It delights you.
I think it delights you.
This is what you want.
You have no idea.
CREDITS