1
00:00:30,824 --> 00:00:34,824
Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie
www.addic7ed.com

2
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Dad! Dad, there's this new place

3
00:00:42,660 --> 00:00:43,990
and you can actually
go and shoot each other,

4
00:00:43,994 --> 00:00:45,459
only it's soft BBs and
they're biodegradable,

5
00:00:45,463 --> 00:00:46,593
and the guns are, like, totally real

6
00:00:46,597 --> 00:00:47,928
except you don't actually get hurt,

7
00:00:47,932 --> 00:00:49,352
and it's like paintball
except for there's no mess,

8
00:00:49,356 --> 00:00:50,399
and the stuff all looks totally real,

9
00:00:50,403 --> 00:00:52,043
and it's called Airsoft
and can I get one?

10
00:00:52,130 --> 00:00:53,432
Wha... Wha... What?

11
00:00:53,437 --> 00:00:55,068
There's an Airsoft field
where everybody plays on teams,

12
00:00:55,072 --> 00:00:56,461
and I promise I'll take
good care of the equipment,

13
00:00:56,465 --> 00:00:57,863
and if you think about it
it's a really great hobby

14
00:00:57,867 --> 00:00:59,473
for team building and
learning communication and...

15
00:00:59,477 --> 00:01:00,768
Whoa... Whoa... Whoa... Whoa...

16
00:01:00,773 --> 00:01:01,774
I was just thinking if you could come

17
00:01:01,778 --> 00:01:03,310
to the Airsoft store with
me... Please, please, please,

18
00:01:03,314 --> 00:01:04,454
all my friends already
bought their stuff,

19
00:01:04,458 --> 00:01:05,556
and it's totally a way
for us to play outside

20
00:01:05,560 --> 00:01:06,913
like you always say... Come on, please,

21
00:01:06,917 --> 00:01:08,448
only we can't tell mom
cuz she won't understand,

22
00:01:08,452 --> 00:01:10,117
but it's totally safe cuz
you wear eye protection.

23
00:01:10,121 --> 00:01:12,414
Okay, okay, Kyle, breathe.

24
00:01:14,562 --> 00:01:16,594
Here it is! Isn't this cool?!

25
00:01:16,887 --> 00:01:18,704
Airsoft Armory?

26
00:01:18,709 --> 00:01:20,344
Come on, Dad! You gotta check it out!

27
00:01:25,369 --> 00:01:28,472
My God! Is this stuff real?!

28
00:01:28,534 --> 00:01:30,469
No, Dad, it's Airsoft.

29
00:01:30,474 --> 00:01:32,643
It's like paintball,
only it's way cooler

30
00:01:32,648 --> 00:01:34,350
and it just looks totally real.

31
00:01:35,208 --> 00:01:37,877
I-I really don't think your
mom would approve, Kyle.

32
00:01:37,882 --> 00:01:39,932
Dad... Please. I'm not a baby anymore.

33
00:01:39,937 --> 00:01:41,354
The other guys... They
already got their stuff.

34
00:01:41,358 --> 00:01:42,539
We're playing today!

35
00:01:42,544 --> 00:01:45,947
Can I please just get, like,
an AK-47 and maybe a Glock?

36
00:01:46,119 --> 00:01:47,353
This stuff is expensive.

37
00:01:47,358 --> 00:01:49,660
Is this really how you want
to spend your allowance?

38
00:01:49,665 --> 00:01:51,334
Yeah, yeah! It really is!

39
00:01:51,798 --> 00:01:54,025
These are all, like, legal, right?

40
00:01:54,119 --> 00:01:55,529
Uh, yes, sir.

41
00:01:55,534 --> 00:01:58,056
You see you load these
soft BBs into the guns

42
00:01:58,061 --> 00:01:59,884
and they just kinda sting.

43
00:02:00,066 --> 00:02:03,536
And you can put the soft BBs
into grenades, rocket launchers,

44
00:02:03,541 --> 00:02:04,708
all kinds of stuff.

45
00:02:05,103 --> 00:02:06,811
So it's all totally safe?

46
00:02:07,894 --> 00:02:11,043
Well, I wouldn't
particularly say that...

47
00:02:11,048 --> 00:02:13,238
I mean... All the stuff is safe,

48
00:02:13,243 --> 00:02:15,953
the guns and grenades
and things... but...

49
00:02:16,053 --> 00:02:19,798
But not necessarily the people
who mostly play Airsoft...

50
00:02:19,864 --> 00:02:22,687
What people mostly play Airsoft?

51
00:02:23,620 --> 00:02:25,548
Teenagers.

52
00:02:26,517 --> 00:02:29,419
Alright, Airsofters, let's listen up.

53
00:02:29,424 --> 00:02:31,193
Before we let you onto the field,

54
00:02:31,198 --> 00:02:33,695
we need to run through
our safety precautions.

55
00:02:33,700 --> 00:02:35,034
- Bruh...
- Bruh...

56
00:02:35,219 --> 00:02:37,501
We know all the safety stuff...

57
00:02:37,506 --> 00:02:38,544
Bruh...

58
00:02:38,967 --> 00:02:42,074
First, your Airsoft guns
must all have a red tip...

59
00:02:42,079 --> 00:02:43,547
Bruh, we know...

60
00:02:43,552 --> 00:02:46,846
Second, there is no full
auto allowed on the field.

61
00:02:46,907 --> 00:02:48,141
Bruh...

62
00:02:48,146 --> 00:02:51,383
Third, there is a 500
fps limit for your BBs.

63
00:02:51,388 --> 00:02:53,691
Bruh, can we play now?

64
00:02:53,696 --> 00:02:56,899
If you're hit by a BB,
raise your hand, say "hit,"

65
00:02:56,904 --> 00:02:58,524
and go back to respawn.

66
00:02:58,529 --> 00:03:00,324
Yes already, yes!

67
00:03:00,329 --> 00:03:02,733
Alright, you guys are Team Rogue Wolf.

68
00:03:02,738 --> 00:03:07,143
You'll be playing against...
Where is Team Floppy Weiner?

69
00:03:07,148 --> 00:03:08,439
Right here!

70
00:03:08,995 --> 00:03:10,497
What?!

71
00:03:10,502 --> 00:03:13,712
Bruh, no! We aren't
playing with little kids!

72
00:03:13,717 --> 00:03:15,986
Yeah, it'll be too easy!

73
00:03:15,991 --> 00:03:17,751
Alright, fine!

74
00:03:17,868 --> 00:03:19,822
Then we'll split the
kids up on two teams

75
00:03:19,827 --> 00:03:22,497
and each one will
have a teenage partner.

76
00:03:22,612 --> 00:03:24,581
Bruh, seriously?

77
00:03:24,606 --> 00:03:27,134
Kid with the poof ball,
that's your teenager...

78
00:03:27,228 --> 00:03:28,228
Bruh.

79
00:03:28,243 --> 00:03:30,394
Green hat kid, that's your teenager...

80
00:03:30,399 --> 00:03:32,501
Team B, those are your two teenagers.

81
00:03:32,750 --> 00:03:33,894
Alright, sweet!

82
00:03:33,899 --> 00:03:36,892
Me and Kenny and our teenagers
are gonna smoke you guys!

83
00:03:42,273 --> 00:03:44,308
Go! Go, go, go, go, go!

84
00:03:45,151 --> 00:03:46,392
Come on! This way!

85
00:03:46,410 --> 00:03:48,909
Yes! Yes! Yes!

86
00:04:24,209 --> 00:04:25,534
I got you, Cartman!

87
00:04:25,662 --> 00:04:27,046
You didn't get me.

88
00:04:27,051 --> 00:04:29,190
I totally got you, I
heard it hit your jacket...

89
00:04:29,195 --> 00:04:30,797
Say hit and go back to respawn!

90
00:04:31,222 --> 00:04:32,638
You didn't hit me, Kyle!

91
00:04:32,643 --> 00:04:34,612
The BBs bounced off a leaf
or something, 'cause...

92
00:04:35,171 --> 00:04:36,973
Okay... Okay, hit!

93
00:04:36,978 --> 00:04:38,620
You got me. That was sweet.

94
00:04:41,594 --> 00:04:44,230
I'm outta green gas, you got green gas?!

95
00:04:44,235 --> 00:04:46,253
Yeah, I got some right here, partner!

96
00:04:49,416 --> 00:04:51,485
Bruh! Keep shooting!

97
00:04:51,675 --> 00:04:53,347
Whoo-hoo!

98
00:05:00,078 --> 00:05:01,747
Oh, my God...

99
00:05:01,752 --> 00:05:03,815
This is the greatest day
of my [BLEEP] life.

100
00:05:08,060 --> 00:05:09,722
Ow! Ow!

101
00:05:09,727 --> 00:05:11,028
Hit!

102
00:05:12,586 --> 00:05:15,222
Yes! Yes! That was so awesome!

103
00:05:15,232 --> 00:05:16,917
You guys, Airsoft rules!

104
00:05:16,922 --> 00:05:18,764
This is... Ow! Hit! Hit!

105
00:05:18,769 --> 00:05:20,070
This is sweet!

106
00:05:21,773 --> 00:05:24,979
- That was so cool!
- The greatest thing like ever!

107
00:05:25,442 --> 00:05:28,045
Dude, I can't believe
we tied! That was epic.

108
00:05:28,050 --> 00:05:30,887
Yeah, well, Team Floppy Weiner
will get you guys next time!

109
00:05:30,892 --> 00:05:33,495
That was seriously the best
time I've had in forever!

110
00:05:33,500 --> 00:05:35,781
Me too! And you know what else is cool?

111
00:05:35,786 --> 00:05:37,521
We all have teenagers now!

112
00:05:37,584 --> 00:05:39,552
I know! My teenager
said he's gonna come over

113
00:05:39,557 --> 00:05:41,025
and show me how to clean my gun!

114
00:05:41,065 --> 00:05:42,834
Cartman, are you okay?

115
00:05:44,690 --> 00:05:46,753
I'm just really happy, you guys...

116
00:05:47,025 --> 00:05:48,360
Airsoft is seriously, like,

117
00:05:48,365 --> 00:05:50,034
the greatest thing in the whole world.

118
00:05:51,062 --> 00:05:52,339
Well, here's my house.

119
00:05:52,597 --> 00:05:54,004
Thanks, you guys.

120
00:05:54,005 --> 00:05:55,261
For just a few, brief hours...

121
00:05:55,266 --> 00:05:57,214
I forgot how much everything sucks.

122
00:06:01,273 --> 00:06:04,009
Can we promise each other we'll
do Airsoft, like, all the time?

123
00:06:04,104 --> 00:06:05,326
Hell yeah, dude.

124
00:06:05,331 --> 00:06:06,777
We just gotta keep our teenagers happy

125
00:06:06,781 --> 00:06:08,717
and we can play Airsoft all the time.

126
00:06:09,920 --> 00:06:11,255
I love you guys.

127
00:06:26,465 --> 00:06:28,834
Hey, Kyle... Uh, how did the Airsoft go?

128
00:06:29,143 --> 00:06:31,690
I took a BB right to the
face with a sniper rifle.

129
00:06:31,695 --> 00:06:33,659
It was so great, Dad.

130
00:06:34,997 --> 00:06:37,763
Are you sure this isn't all a
little too much for you, son?

131
00:06:37,768 --> 00:06:39,750
I'm not a baby anymore, Dad!

132
00:06:40,152 --> 00:06:42,058
Oh, that's probably my teenager!

133
00:06:42,063 --> 00:06:43,612
See ya, Dad. I love you!

134
00:06:43,617 --> 00:06:45,456
I love you, too, Kyle.

135
00:06:46,630 --> 00:06:48,198
I got it!

136
00:06:48,404 --> 00:06:52,408
Gerald... why is Kyle
wearing my makeup on his face?

137
00:06:52,413 --> 00:06:54,816
He's just... experimenting.

138
00:06:59,999 --> 00:07:01,855
Are you Kyle?

139
00:07:02,212 --> 00:07:03,241
Yeah!

140
00:07:03,246 --> 00:07:04,777
I'm here to drop off Trevor.

141
00:07:04,782 --> 00:07:06,872
He said he's your teenager now.

142
00:07:06,877 --> 00:07:08,078
Yah, that's right!

143
00:07:08,083 --> 00:07:10,719
Okay! Well, good luck.

144
00:07:10,724 --> 00:07:12,459
What time are you picking me up?!

145
00:07:12,464 --> 00:07:15,199
Just gimme a call... Don't
make it too soon, though,

146
00:07:15,204 --> 00:07:17,324
because I am going to relax.

147
00:07:17,329 --> 00:07:19,351
Fine, go ahead, I'm glad!

148
00:07:19,356 --> 00:07:22,199
Go away, I don't wanna
see your stupid [BLEEP] face!

149
00:07:26,652 --> 00:07:30,162
Cool, dude, so, uh, you wanna,
like, clean our Airsoft guns?

150
00:07:30,167 --> 00:07:31,842
I'm starving [BLEEP] to death.

151
00:07:31,867 --> 00:07:33,678
Can you make me some [BLEEP] food?!

152
00:07:33,683 --> 00:07:35,468
Like what kind of food do you want?

153
00:07:35,473 --> 00:07:37,475
[BLEEP] leave me alone!

154
00:07:37,480 --> 00:07:38,848
Okay! Okay! Okay!

155
00:07:45,542 --> 00:07:46,737
Hello?

156
00:07:47,119 --> 00:07:49,228
Bruh, how do I make ramen?

157
00:07:51,451 --> 00:07:53,052
Excuse me?

158
00:07:53,085 --> 00:07:56,255
I'm starving, and the
instructions are all stupid.

159
00:07:56,699 --> 00:07:58,529
Oh, is this my teenager?

160
00:07:58,534 --> 00:07:59,635
How's it going, dude?

161
00:07:59,640 --> 00:08:00,964
It's not going!

162
00:08:00,969 --> 00:08:03,683
The ramen's all hard and
I can't eat it like that!

163
00:08:03,870 --> 00:08:06,271
Well, you have to put the
noodles in boiling water.

164
00:08:06,800 --> 00:08:08,754
Where do I get water?

165
00:08:09,526 --> 00:08:12,083
You... Do you have a sink?

166
00:08:12,566 --> 00:08:13,631
Bruh.

167
00:08:14,394 --> 00:08:15,608
Bruh, what?

168
00:08:15,871 --> 00:08:18,344
I'm sorry I'm not a five star chef!

169
00:08:18,349 --> 00:08:19,884
Hey, man, it's cool. Lemme uh...

170
00:08:19,889 --> 00:08:21,491
Lemme slow it down for ya.

171
00:08:29,383 --> 00:08:31,933
That one right there! Take him out!

172
00:08:32,738 --> 00:08:35,202
Dude, Swamp Sniper rules.

173
00:08:40,066 --> 00:08:41,718
Hello?

174
00:08:43,612 --> 00:08:45,380
What... What are you doing, dude?

175
00:08:45,902 --> 00:08:47,808
I need a bathroom.

176
00:08:48,433 --> 00:08:50,381
Y-You need to use my bathroom?

177
00:08:50,386 --> 00:08:53,256
I have to go to the bathroom...
Brah, what?!

178
00:09:00,185 --> 00:09:02,087
Dude, Kenny, the weirdest
thing just happened.

179
00:09:02,230 --> 00:09:03,656
My teenager showed up at my house,

180
00:09:03,661 --> 00:09:05,729
and he's acting really strange.

181
00:09:05,888 --> 00:09:07,031
Mrph rmhmhm rm!

182
00:09:07,036 --> 00:09:08,506
Yours did too?

183
00:09:08,928 --> 00:09:11,464
Why do I have all these
[BLEEP] zits on my face?!

184
00:09:11,664 --> 00:09:13,999
Mrph rmhmhm rm mrph rmhmhm rm!

185
00:09:14,004 --> 00:09:15,468
You don't even [BLEEP] care!

186
00:09:15,473 --> 00:09:18,552
You don't care because
you don't even [BLEEP] know me!

187
00:09:21,011 --> 00:09:23,545
What the hell are these things?

188
00:09:30,921 --> 00:09:32,690
Mrph rmhmhm rm!

189
00:09:43,530 --> 00:09:45,974
Dude, that's my friend
Kenny, we gotta kill him!

190
00:09:45,979 --> 00:09:48,006
I don't take orders from you!

191
00:09:48,011 --> 00:09:50,287
Okay, okay, but if we kill
Kenny we get a point, right?

192
00:09:50,292 --> 00:09:51,560
Come on!

193
00:09:55,334 --> 00:09:56,335
Agh!

194
00:09:56,340 --> 00:09:58,201
Mrph mrph mrph mrph!

195
00:09:59,604 --> 00:10:00,846
Hey, hey, hey, hey!

196
00:10:00,851 --> 00:10:03,133
No shooting from less than 10 feet!

197
00:10:03,138 --> 00:10:04,883
I wasn't less than 10 feet!

198
00:10:04,888 --> 00:10:06,323
It's okay, it's fine. We're sorry.

199
00:10:06,386 --> 00:10:08,821
I'm not gonna play
anymore. This is stupid.

200
00:10:08,855 --> 00:10:10,701
Dude, it's okay, it's just a gay rule.

201
00:10:10,706 --> 00:10:12,435
Come on, let's beat these guys!

202
00:10:16,834 --> 00:10:18,135
Hit!

203
00:10:24,422 --> 00:10:25,804
Dude, Kyle, where are you?

204
00:10:25,809 --> 00:10:27,602
We started playing like 20 minutes ago.

205
00:10:27,607 --> 00:10:28,626
Yeah, I know!

206
00:10:28,631 --> 00:10:30,791
My teenager asked me to take
him shopping for hair gel.

207
00:10:30,976 --> 00:10:32,406
Hair gel?! What the [BLEEP] dude,

208
00:10:32,411 --> 00:10:33,623
we're getting killed out here!

209
00:10:33,628 --> 00:10:35,841
Just do your best, I'll
be there as fast as I can!

210
00:10:38,085 --> 00:10:40,724
Okay, here it is. This
is the health care aisle.

211
00:10:41,673 --> 00:10:43,475
Could you go a little faster?

212
00:10:48,297 --> 00:10:49,897
Okay, here's all the hair product stuff,

213
00:10:49,902 --> 00:10:51,063
which one do you like to use?

214
00:10:51,068 --> 00:10:52,469
I don't know.

215
00:10:52,531 --> 00:10:54,709
- What?
- I don't know!

216
00:10:54,714 --> 00:10:56,795
Kyle? What are you doing?

217
00:10:56,800 --> 00:10:58,227
Ugh, nothing, I'm...

218
00:10:58,232 --> 00:10:59,883
I'm just shopping with my teenager.

219
00:10:59,888 --> 00:11:01,340
Can we go now?

220
00:11:01,345 --> 00:11:05,560
Okay, but you asked me if
I could buy you some hair gel.

221
00:11:06,072 --> 00:11:07,440
Shut up...

222
00:11:07,677 --> 00:11:10,279
Well... at least I'm not the only
one dealing with this crap.

223
00:11:13,786 --> 00:11:15,279
Your guy wants hair gel, too?

224
00:11:15,284 --> 00:11:17,748
No, my teenager wants more lotion.

225
00:11:18,285 --> 00:11:20,159
All this guy does is
hang out in the bathroom

226
00:11:20,164 --> 00:11:22,099
and go through like two
bottles of lotion a day.

227
00:11:22,100 --> 00:11:23,400
I swear I don't know how soft

228
00:11:23,405 --> 00:11:25,106
you could possibly
want your hands to be.

229
00:11:25,321 --> 00:11:26,857
I just wanna get to the Airsoft field,

230
00:11:26,862 --> 00:11:28,334
Stan says your team is killing them!

231
00:11:28,339 --> 00:11:31,013
Damn right! Team Floppy
Weiner will destroy you guys!

232
00:11:31,018 --> 00:11:32,987
Yeah, we'll see when
I use my sniper rifle!

233
00:11:32,992 --> 00:11:34,440
You have to find me first!

234
00:11:34,445 --> 00:11:35,813
I gotta go to the bathroom.

235
00:11:35,818 --> 00:11:37,876
Oh, you gotta be [BLEEP] kidding me.

236
00:11:37,881 --> 00:11:39,233
There's one over by the registers.

237
00:11:39,237 --> 00:11:41,106
No, you are not taking the lotion.

238
00:11:41,111 --> 00:11:42,670
I [BLEEP] hate you!

239
00:11:43,120 --> 00:11:45,055
Okay, I'm sorry you hate me.

240
00:11:45,060 --> 00:11:47,596
Just wanna [BLEEP] play Airsoft, buddy.

241
00:11:59,834 --> 00:12:02,368
Oh, my God, you gotta be shitting me.

242
00:12:02,752 --> 00:12:04,236
Yeah... hello?

243
00:12:05,474 --> 00:12:07,935
I'm not gay.

244
00:12:09,174 --> 00:12:10,841
Whu... What?

245
00:12:11,215 --> 00:12:12,751
Why'd you call me gay?!

246
00:12:12,756 --> 00:12:14,451
Like, what the hell do you know?!

247
00:12:14,456 --> 00:12:16,158
You don't even [BLEEP] know me.

248
00:12:16,591 --> 00:12:18,318
I-I didn't call you gay.

249
00:12:18,323 --> 00:12:20,591
They said I couldn't
shoot a BB within 10 feet,

250
00:12:20,596 --> 00:12:22,248
and I just had to say bang bang,

251
00:12:22,253 --> 00:12:24,355
and you got all salty
and said I was gay.

252
00:12:24,590 --> 00:12:26,158
I was saying the rule was gay.

253
00:12:26,163 --> 00:12:28,899
I wasn't talking anything
about sexual orientation.

254
00:12:29,123 --> 00:12:30,901
Brah.

255
00:12:30,906 --> 00:12:32,538
You're right, I shouldn't
have used that word!

256
00:12:32,542 --> 00:12:33,975
Look... I was one of
the first people ever

257
00:12:33,979 --> 00:12:35,382
to say there was nothing
wrong with being gay.

258
00:12:35,386 --> 00:12:36,769
I had a dog that was gay!

259
00:12:36,774 --> 00:12:38,475
Oh, so I'm a [BLEEP] dog now?!

260
00:12:38,480 --> 00:12:39,881
I'll [BLEEP] kill you!

261
00:12:40,162 --> 00:12:41,674
Okay, dude...

262
00:12:41,679 --> 00:12:43,647
What... Do you want me to do?

263
00:12:43,710 --> 00:12:45,818
I want you to just leave me alone!

264
00:12:45,850 --> 00:12:48,365
Okay, but you called me...

265
00:12:49,948 --> 00:12:52,084
Hello? Hello?

266
00:12:53,248 --> 00:12:54,553
What are you doing?

267
00:12:54,558 --> 00:12:56,594
I'm holding my hand over a lighter!

268
00:12:56,779 --> 00:12:58,796
It's burning the shit out of my hand!

269
00:12:58,857 --> 00:13:01,260
Okay, don't hold your
hand over a lighter.

270
00:13:01,265 --> 00:13:03,951
Bruh! Bruh, this hurts so bad!

271
00:13:04,099 --> 00:13:06,258
Oh, dude, it's [BLEEP] black.

272
00:13:06,263 --> 00:13:08,467
Is that what a third
degree burn looks like?!

273
00:13:08,638 --> 00:13:10,641
Jesus [BLEEP] Christ.

274
00:13:10,646 --> 00:13:13,540
Dood, I just so lit burned my hand.

275
00:13:13,545 --> 00:13:16,482
I need like... I need
like emergency services.

276
00:13:16,487 --> 00:13:18,287
Bruh, that was stoopid.

277
00:13:18,451 --> 00:13:20,084
Yeah, that was kinda stupid.

278
00:13:20,089 --> 00:13:22,448
I'm not [BLEEP] stupid!

279
00:13:25,789 --> 00:13:28,099
I seriously don't know what to do...

280
00:13:28,104 --> 00:13:31,240
I've tried being nice,
I've tried being harsh...

281
00:13:31,462 --> 00:13:33,860
And I get nothing from
my teenager. Nothing.

282
00:13:33,974 --> 00:13:35,008
Mrph.

283
00:13:35,013 --> 00:13:36,099
Well, you're lucky.

284
00:13:36,104 --> 00:13:38,359
At least your teenager
doesn't threaten to kill you.

285
00:13:38,364 --> 00:13:40,349
I'd love him to threaten to do anything.

286
00:13:40,354 --> 00:13:42,535
I'd love him to do. Anything.

287
00:13:42,791 --> 00:13:45,337
On the rare occasion that my
teenager isn't in the bathroom,

288
00:13:45,342 --> 00:13:47,961
all he does is talk
about his miserable life.

289
00:13:47,966 --> 00:13:50,204
I'm like... okay, dude,
I've got problems too.

290
00:13:50,209 --> 00:13:52,369
But of course teenagers don't
care about your problems.

291
00:13:52,402 --> 00:13:54,938
I'm like, "Look, buddy,
I live in a hot dog. Okay?

292
00:13:54,943 --> 00:13:57,288
Like, maybe let's stop
bitching and just play Airsoft."

293
00:13:57,320 --> 00:13:59,519
But you can't say that because
then they're just gonna...

294
00:13:59,523 --> 00:14:01,087
want to kill themselves.

295
00:14:01,182 --> 00:14:03,615
- Yes, yes.
- Mrph rmhmhm rm?

296
00:14:03,620 --> 00:14:04,988
Mrph rmhmhm rm?

297
00:14:04,993 --> 00:14:07,430
No, we can't give up on Airsoft...

298
00:14:07,435 --> 00:14:09,400
I'm like four hundred
dollars into this hobby.

299
00:14:09,405 --> 00:14:10,826
And we love it.

300
00:14:10,831 --> 00:14:12,922
Except for the part about
being around teenagers.

301
00:14:12,927 --> 00:14:14,506
Well, apparently, a lot of people

302
00:14:14,511 --> 00:14:16,016
are in the same situation we're in.

303
00:14:16,021 --> 00:14:17,047
What do you mean?

304
00:14:17,052 --> 00:14:19,704
I've been reading this book...
"Help, My Teenager Hates Me."

305
00:14:19,709 --> 00:14:21,396
- Wow.
- Yeah... and...

306
00:14:21,401 --> 00:14:22,961
it has some interesting ideas.

307
00:14:22,966 --> 00:14:25,183
It says we're basically just
dealing with an age difference

308
00:14:25,187 --> 00:14:26,663
and we need to try and
connect with them.

309
00:14:26,667 --> 00:14:27,668
Mrph rmhmhm

310
00:14:27,672 --> 00:14:30,330
It says we should take them camping.

311
00:14:31,097 --> 00:14:32,955
Camping?

312
00:14:34,654 --> 00:14:36,256
Bruh...

313
00:14:36,727 --> 00:14:38,107
Bruh...

314
00:14:39,229 --> 00:14:41,365
Alright, guys! We got
the tents all set up.

315
00:14:41,532 --> 00:14:43,091
Yeah, check em out!

316
00:14:44,715 --> 00:14:46,350
Boy, isn't it nice out here?

317
00:14:46,355 --> 00:14:47,757
Mrph rmhmhm rm!

318
00:14:47,762 --> 00:14:50,131
There's a lake over there
where we can rent kayaks!

319
00:14:50,654 --> 00:14:52,576
So what do you guys wanna do?

320
00:14:53,271 --> 00:14:54,904
Go home.

321
00:14:55,763 --> 00:14:58,904
K, yeah, we can do that
later, but first maybe, um...

322
00:14:58,909 --> 00:15:00,506
let's bond a bit...

323
00:15:02,314 --> 00:15:04,584
Okay, looks like the tents are set up...

324
00:15:04,589 --> 00:15:05,891
Can you come out now?

325
00:15:06,123 --> 00:15:08,483
I'm going to the bathroom!

326
00:15:09,770 --> 00:15:11,624
Okay, well, you should
probably finish up.

327
00:15:11,629 --> 00:15:12,961
I know you took the lotion in there.

328
00:15:12,965 --> 00:15:14,793
You really don't need
soft hands for camping.

329
00:15:14,798 --> 00:15:16,767
Leave me alone!

330
00:15:19,866 --> 00:15:21,100
Come on, dude.

331
00:15:21,105 --> 00:15:23,207
No shit in the world takes that long.

332
00:15:28,998 --> 00:15:30,663
Hey, buddy, what's up?

333
00:15:30,856 --> 00:15:33,288
I thought you were gonna go
out and play Airsoft today?

334
00:15:33,698 --> 00:15:35,725
No... I don't think I'm gonna go...

335
00:15:35,913 --> 00:15:37,512
Oh.

336
00:15:37,517 --> 00:15:39,285
D-Did something happen?

337
00:15:39,290 --> 00:15:40,665
You wouldn't understand, Dad.

338
00:15:40,670 --> 00:15:42,717
I just can't deal with teenagers.

339
00:15:44,104 --> 00:15:46,082
Oh. Well, you know, they say

340
00:15:46,087 --> 00:15:48,189
that the brain chemistry of a teenager

341
00:15:48,194 --> 00:15:50,196
is the same as that of a psychopath.

342
00:15:50,286 --> 00:15:51,754
The hormones and all that...

343
00:15:51,759 --> 00:15:55,202
It's been proven they're
literally criminally insane.

344
00:15:56,545 --> 00:15:57,736
You know, I just...

345
00:15:57,741 --> 00:16:01,402
I just wanted to have
fun... And shoot my friends.

346
00:16:01,647 --> 00:16:04,466
I-I just wanted to
shoot my friends, dad.

347
00:16:04,701 --> 00:16:06,970
Oh, buddy, well,

348
00:16:07,102 --> 00:16:09,205
maybe you could ask the Airsoft field

349
00:16:09,210 --> 00:16:11,264
to let you play without the teenagers.

350
00:16:11,269 --> 00:16:13,798
We did! They said
they hate the teenagers

351
00:16:13,823 --> 00:16:16,313
just as much as anybody, but
they can't get rid of them.

352
00:16:16,318 --> 00:16:18,520
And we've got no one
else to partner with.

353
00:16:18,959 --> 00:16:24,106
Well... did you guys
ever consider your dads?

354
00:16:31,393 --> 00:16:33,092
Come on in, boys.

355
00:16:33,734 --> 00:16:35,728
Jesus Christ...

356
00:16:35,733 --> 00:16:38,147
How long has this store been here?

357
00:16:39,208 --> 00:16:40,470
What do you think?

358
00:16:40,475 --> 00:16:43,556
This one can shoot a thousand
BBs in like five seconds.

359
00:16:43,561 --> 00:16:45,595
Seems pretty dangerous.

360
00:16:45,600 --> 00:16:47,970
What if the police
thought that gun was real?

361
00:16:47,975 --> 00:16:49,540
No, it's safe. See?

362
00:16:49,545 --> 00:16:51,962
As long as your gun has a
red tip and you're white,

363
00:16:51,967 --> 00:16:53,221
police won't shoot you.

364
00:16:53,254 --> 00:16:54,556
Oh, that's good.

365
00:16:54,561 --> 00:16:56,724
How can I, uh... help you gentlemen?

366
00:16:56,725 --> 00:16:58,048
We need some equipment.

367
00:16:58,053 --> 00:17:00,294
We're gonna try and
take out some teenagers.

368
00:17:01,690 --> 00:17:05,032
Huh... I think that's a
somewhat foolhardy plan.

369
00:17:05,095 --> 00:17:07,964
Have you seen the kind of
weaponry the teenagers buy?

370
00:17:07,997 --> 00:17:11,225
It's some of the biggest,
nastiest weapons we sell.

371
00:17:11,431 --> 00:17:14,536
Yeah, well, I've got something bigger.

372
00:17:15,309 --> 00:17:17,600
American Express Platinum.

373
00:17:18,099 --> 00:17:20,639
Give me one of everything you have.

374
00:17:21,483 --> 00:17:23,725
Yes, sir!

375
00:17:24,847 --> 00:17:28,184
We... have completely had
it up to here with you.

376
00:17:28,189 --> 00:17:29,457
Up to here!

377
00:17:29,784 --> 00:17:31,754
Our friend Kyle just
wanted to play Airsoft.

378
00:17:31,759 --> 00:17:34,509
And now he's quit
because of your attitudes.

379
00:17:34,514 --> 00:17:36,074
What do you have to say for yourselves?

380
00:17:37,112 --> 00:17:38,514
Brah.

381
00:17:38,772 --> 00:17:40,858
Yeah, brah, great, thank you.

382
00:17:40,863 --> 00:17:42,698
I can't... I can't.

383
00:17:42,703 --> 00:17:44,705
Guys, things have to improve.

384
00:17:44,706 --> 00:17:45,907
They just have to.

385
00:17:45,940 --> 00:17:48,442
I've never seen anyone so disrespectful.

386
00:17:48,447 --> 00:17:50,315
Mrph rmhmhm rm mrph rmhmhm rm!

387
00:17:50,320 --> 00:17:51,955
Mrph rmhmhm rm mrph rmhmhm rm?

388
00:17:51,960 --> 00:17:53,862
Mrph rmhmhm rm mrph rmhmhm rm!

389
00:17:53,867 --> 00:17:56,236
I have never seen Kenny like this ever.

390
00:17:56,412 --> 00:17:58,303
Fine! Then just leave!

391
00:17:58,308 --> 00:18:00,110
Cuz we don't want you here.

392
00:18:00,316 --> 00:18:01,784
And we don't want you here!

393
00:18:01,789 --> 00:18:03,724
We just wanna play Airsoft

394
00:18:03,725 --> 00:18:05,593
without any of you on our team!

395
00:18:05,784 --> 00:18:07,990
Fine, then why don't you
just be on your own team?

396
00:18:07,995 --> 00:18:09,322
That sounds totally fine!

397
00:18:09,327 --> 00:18:11,027
Us against you, let's [BLEEP] go!

398
00:18:11,032 --> 00:18:14,602
Fine and if we win, you stay
out of our lives forever!

399
00:18:14,839 --> 00:18:17,366
Fine, and you too when we beat all you!

400
00:18:17,558 --> 00:18:19,235
Yeah, you and what army?

401
00:18:19,240 --> 00:18:20,875
This army!

402
00:18:26,349 --> 00:18:28,517
- Dad?
- Mrph?

403
00:18:28,522 --> 00:18:31,185
Any of you pussy teenagers wanna Airsoft

404
00:18:31,190 --> 00:18:33,444
against some drunk rednecks?

405
00:18:38,175 --> 00:18:39,722
We got new partners, guys!

406
00:18:39,727 --> 00:18:41,963
That's awesome. I wish I had a dad.

407
00:18:42,225 --> 00:18:44,085
And that I didn't live in a hot dog.

408
00:18:44,090 --> 00:18:46,325
Oh, we got you a partner, too, Eric.

409
00:18:46,624 --> 00:18:49,389
You might remember Stan's Uncle Jimbo.

410
00:18:50,818 --> 00:18:54,725
Did somebody say somethin'
about Airsoft against teenagers?!

411
00:19:06,577 --> 00:19:07,945
Ow! Hit!

412
00:19:08,150 --> 00:19:09,952
Ow! I said hit, you bitch!

413
00:19:10,217 --> 00:19:12,188
That's it, son! Light em up!

414
00:19:12,193 --> 00:19:13,811
Mrph rmhmhm rm!

415
00:19:14,257 --> 00:19:16,459
- Hit!
- Hit!

416
00:19:16,464 --> 00:19:17,565
Brah!

417
00:19:18,178 --> 00:19:20,501
Yee-haw!

418
00:19:22,822 --> 00:19:25,258
But there's one teenager
I can't seem to find!

419
00:19:26,968 --> 00:19:28,503
I know where he is...

420
00:19:35,783 --> 00:19:38,131
I'm so sick of this crap...

421
00:19:40,984 --> 00:19:42,819
Bruh! What the hell are you doin'?!

422
00:19:43,022 --> 00:19:45,952
What you do to Jergens
Lotion isn't right.

423
00:19:48,830 --> 00:19:50,290
Ow! Ow! Ow!

424
00:19:50,295 --> 00:19:52,001
Ow! Ow! Bruh!

425
00:19:52,006 --> 00:19:53,267
Aah, bruh!

426
00:19:53,272 --> 00:19:54,288
Aah!

427
00:19:56,765 --> 00:20:00,102
Ow, my dick! My dick! Aah!

428
00:20:00,356 --> 00:20:02,553
They're not coming out of
cover! I don't see them!

429
00:20:02,558 --> 00:20:04,194
It's okay, I've got an idea.

430
00:20:08,060 --> 00:20:09,228
Cover me.

431
00:20:22,392 --> 00:20:23,760
Bruh...

432
00:20:25,231 --> 00:20:28,264
Dood... that's weed. I smell weed.

433
00:20:32,206 --> 00:20:34,366
That smells dope!

434
00:20:34,587 --> 00:20:37,924
Dood, it's a whole lit jar of weed!

435
00:20:38,146 --> 00:20:40,710
Dope! That is so dope. Bruh!

436
00:20:45,186 --> 00:20:46,467
Bruh!

437
00:20:46,472 --> 00:20:48,518
Ow! Aah! Yow!

438
00:20:48,523 --> 00:20:50,958
Bruh! Bruh!

439
00:20:50,963 --> 00:20:52,795
Yeah!

440
00:20:53,194 --> 00:20:56,745
- That was so epic!
- Did you see how those teenagers ran?

441
00:20:56,746 --> 00:20:58,247
That was great.

442
00:20:58,272 --> 00:21:00,447
That was so sweet, you guys!

443
00:21:00,452 --> 00:21:03,137
I bet the teenagers will never
go back to that place again!

444
00:21:03,142 --> 00:21:04,343
Of course they won't!

445
00:21:04,348 --> 00:21:06,650
I saw half of em' break
their guns in frustration.

446
00:21:06,736 --> 00:21:08,783
Hey, thanks, you guys.

447
00:21:08,788 --> 00:21:10,798
We couldn't have gotten rid
of the teenagers without you.

448
00:21:10,802 --> 00:21:13,611
- Yeah, thanks, Dad.
- Mrph rm!

449
00:21:13,877 --> 00:21:15,812
Hey, that's what we're here for, right?

450
00:21:15,817 --> 00:21:18,186
We're just glad you wanted
to spend some time with us.

451
00:21:18,247 --> 00:21:19,415
Well, I'm hungry,

452
00:21:19,420 --> 00:21:21,556
is there any place around
here to get a hot dog?

453
00:21:21,618 --> 00:21:24,009
Yes... Yes, I live in a hot dog.

454
00:21:24,014 --> 00:21:25,025
It's right over here!

455
00:21:25,030 --> 00:21:26,828
Come on, you guys, help
me get it all ready!

456
00:21:26,833 --> 00:21:29,369
- Okay, let's go!
- Come on, guys!

457
00:21:32,646 --> 00:21:34,814
Should I take them out now?

458
00:21:35,386 --> 00:21:36,899
Not yet...

459
00:21:36,904 --> 00:21:39,960
We still have a few good years
before they turn into monsters.

460
00:21:40,779 --> 00:21:47,064
Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie
www.addic7ed.com