1 00:00:01,253 --> 00:00:02,992 Previously on Young Sheldon... 2 00:00:02,995 --> 00:00:04,968 - Here we are. - What is this? 3 00:00:04,971 --> 00:00:06,134 The dorm room. 4 00:00:06,136 --> 00:00:07,773 It's all yours. 5 00:00:07,776 --> 00:00:10,298 Now you can study, take naps, do whatever you want. 6 00:00:10,301 --> 00:00:11,604 No one's living here? 7 00:00:11,607 --> 00:00:13,782 Well, we had an Indian exchange student, 8 00:00:13,785 --> 00:00:15,648 but he developed a taste for barbecue, 9 00:00:15,651 --> 00:00:18,070 so his parents made him go home. 10 00:00:18,073 --> 00:00:20,247 Wait, he has a room here and at school? 11 00:00:20,250 --> 00:00:23,107 You have your own room. I never had that growing up. 12 00:00:23,110 --> 00:00:25,804 And then I was in the barracks, and then I married your mother. 13 00:00:25,807 --> 00:00:26,806 Dang. 14 00:00:26,809 --> 00:00:27,960 Yeah, tell me about it. 15 00:00:27,963 --> 00:00:29,976 What happened to appreciating what you have? 16 00:00:29,979 --> 00:00:31,717 Yeah, yeah, blah, blah, blah. 17 00:00:31,720 --> 00:00:33,976 - Wait, you have a single? - Uh-huh. 18 00:00:33,979 --> 00:00:35,413 And you don't even sleep here? 19 00:00:35,416 --> 00:00:36,633 Well, sometimes I take naps, 20 00:00:36,636 --> 00:00:38,682 but that mattress is lumpy, lumpy. 21 00:00:40,214 --> 00:00:42,226 I was learning to enjoy 22 00:00:42,229 --> 00:00:44,389 the perks of university life, 23 00:00:44,392 --> 00:00:47,088 including a dorm to study and nap in. 24 00:00:47,090 --> 00:00:49,134 And since this was college, 25 00:00:49,136 --> 00:00:52,101 I was even allowed to have girls in my room. 26 00:00:52,104 --> 00:00:54,304 Here we go. Nice and clean. 27 00:00:54,307 --> 00:00:56,367 Did you use the unscented detergent? 28 00:00:56,370 --> 00:00:58,503 You've got a nose. Sniff it yourself. 29 00:01:00,190 --> 00:01:02,364 I even had my own bathroom, 30 00:01:02,373 --> 00:01:04,272 which gave me the perfect place to store 31 00:01:04,275 --> 00:01:06,148 my impressive collection of sunscreens 32 00:01:06,151 --> 00:01:07,586 and bug repellents. 33 00:01:07,589 --> 00:01:10,806 However, one thing I would never get used to 34 00:01:10,809 --> 00:01:15,085 was college students' love of blasting rock and roll music. 35 00:01:34,137 --> 00:01:35,804 Uh, who are you? 36 00:01:35,807 --> 00:01:37,257 I'm in the room next door. 37 00:01:37,260 --> 00:01:38,650 Oh, you're that smart kid. 38 00:01:38,653 --> 00:01:39,739 Who is it? 39 00:01:39,742 --> 00:01:40,820 That smart kid. 40 00:01:40,823 --> 00:01:42,518 - Tell him to come in. - Want to come in? 41 00:01:42,521 --> 00:01:44,956 - No, I'm here to complain. - He's here to complain. 42 00:01:44,959 --> 00:01:46,829 - Then don't let him in. - You can't come in. 43 00:01:46,832 --> 00:01:49,702 I'm trying to study, and your loud music is very distracting. 44 00:01:49,705 --> 00:01:51,671 - You mean the game? - "The game"? 45 00:01:51,674 --> 00:01:54,078 I'm not up on today's one-named pop stars. 46 00:01:54,081 --> 00:01:55,428 No. It's a video game. 47 00:01:55,431 --> 00:01:57,039 You have video games? 48 00:01:57,042 --> 00:01:58,382 A bunch. You play? 49 00:01:58,385 --> 00:02:00,992 My meemaw and I beat Quest of Adeera. 50 00:02:00,995 --> 00:02:02,429 Dude, this kid beat Adeera. 51 00:02:02,432 --> 00:02:04,521 - Well, tell him to come in. - Come in. 52 00:02:07,127 --> 00:02:09,433 - Hello. - What's up, homey? 53 00:02:11,351 --> 00:02:13,435 Why do you have a Rosetta stone poster? 54 00:02:13,437 --> 00:02:15,481 - Linguistics major. - Hmm. 55 00:02:15,483 --> 00:02:17,483 Sit. You can play next. 56 00:02:17,485 --> 00:02:18,968 So, how old are you? 57 00:02:18,971 --> 00:02:20,057 Twelve. 58 00:02:20,060 --> 00:02:21,321 - Damn. - And they let you 59 00:02:21,323 --> 00:02:22,540 live here by yourself? 60 00:02:22,543 --> 00:02:24,593 That room's just for during the day to study. 61 00:02:24,596 --> 00:02:26,205 Didn't I see some lady in there? 62 00:02:26,208 --> 00:02:27,585 That must've been my mom. 63 00:02:27,588 --> 00:02:29,146 Dude, his mom is hot. 64 00:02:29,149 --> 00:02:31,390 What is wrong with you? Don't listen to him. 65 00:02:31,393 --> 00:02:33,480 He thinks any female with a pulse is hot. 66 00:02:33,483 --> 00:02:34,700 I don't think your mom is hot. 67 00:02:34,703 --> 00:02:36,834 Congratulations, you're more mature than him. 68 00:02:36,837 --> 00:02:39,315 Don't feel bad. I'm more mature than most people. 69 00:02:39,318 --> 00:02:41,668 You're up. 70 00:02:43,032 --> 00:02:45,685 Grown-ups and the elderly had always liked me, 71 00:02:45,687 --> 00:02:48,340 and now I had won over undergrads. 72 00:02:48,342 --> 00:02:49,992 Like a beloved board game, 73 00:02:49,995 --> 00:02:53,213 I'm fun for ages nine to 90. 74 00:03:04,382 --> 00:03:10,726 - Synced and corrected by VitoSilans - ... www.Addic7ed.com ... 75 00:03:15,282 --> 00:03:17,804 Oh, look at these prices. 76 00:03:17,806 --> 00:03:20,070 I could make this dress for Missy. 77 00:03:20,073 --> 00:03:21,681 Meemaw, make her stop. 78 00:03:21,684 --> 00:03:24,820 Come on, Mary. You already got one kid that gets picked on. 79 00:03:25,898 --> 00:03:27,843 Oh, cute. 80 00:03:27,846 --> 00:03:30,000 Oh, it's a little short. 81 00:03:30,003 --> 00:03:31,350 It's supposed to be this length. 82 00:03:31,353 --> 00:03:32,656 It's adorable. 83 00:03:32,659 --> 00:03:33,745 Thank you. 84 00:03:33,748 --> 00:03:34,951 Does it come down any? 85 00:03:34,953 --> 00:03:36,031 Mom. 86 00:03:36,034 --> 00:03:37,692 Come on, Mary, it's fine. 87 00:03:37,695 --> 00:03:39,906 Well, you're not getting it. 88 00:03:39,909 --> 00:03:41,687 All my friends dress like this. 89 00:03:41,690 --> 00:03:45,172 Arms by your sides. I want to measure. 90 00:03:46,005 --> 00:03:49,218 See? It's shorter than your fingertips. 91 00:03:49,221 --> 00:03:50,468 What the hell is happening? 92 00:03:50,471 --> 00:03:52,907 - She wants to ruin my life. - The school dress code 93 00:03:52,910 --> 00:03:56,054 says that all bottoms must extend past the fingertips. 94 00:03:56,057 --> 00:03:58,148 It's close enough, and they don't even check. 95 00:03:58,151 --> 00:03:59,937 Well, I am not wasting good money 96 00:03:59,940 --> 00:04:01,984 on something that you can't wear to school. 97 00:04:01,987 --> 00:04:03,638 Then I'll wear it on weekends. 98 00:04:03,641 --> 00:04:05,547 Go try on something else. 99 00:04:07,378 --> 00:04:10,329 I'll get it for her. I don't mind wasting my money. 100 00:04:10,332 --> 00:04:12,202 Please? 101 00:04:12,205 --> 00:04:13,414 Fine. 102 00:04:13,417 --> 00:04:15,000 But you are not wearing it to school, 103 00:04:15,003 --> 00:04:16,867 and you are not wearing it without tights. 104 00:04:16,870 --> 00:04:17,913 Love you. 105 00:04:17,916 --> 00:04:19,916 Hey, I'm the one paying for it. 106 00:04:19,919 --> 00:04:21,092 Love you more. 107 00:04:21,095 --> 00:04:23,402 Hear that? 108 00:04:26,835 --> 00:04:28,574 - Hey, Tom. You wanted to see me? - Yeah. 109 00:04:28,577 --> 00:04:30,484 Why don't you shut the door and have a seat. 110 00:04:30,487 --> 00:04:31,878 The door? 111 00:04:31,880 --> 00:04:33,621 This can't be good. 112 00:04:35,971 --> 00:04:38,493 Uh, look, 113 00:04:38,495 --> 00:04:41,773 you know your team didn't have a great year. 114 00:04:41,776 --> 00:04:43,585 - I'm aware. - I'm aware, 115 00:04:43,588 --> 00:04:46,067 too, 'cause I've been hearing about it everywhere. 116 00:04:46,070 --> 00:04:48,481 The grocery store, gas station, 117 00:04:48,484 --> 00:04:49,617 barbershop. 118 00:04:49,620 --> 00:04:52,500 And I'm only in there, like, 30 seconds, George. 119 00:04:52,503 --> 00:04:53,976 I know people are upset, 120 00:04:53,979 --> 00:04:56,132 - but we're gonna turn things around. - Look, 121 00:04:56,135 --> 00:04:57,569 I'm on your side. 122 00:04:57,572 --> 00:05:01,398 But you should know the boosters got pitchforks out. 123 00:05:01,401 --> 00:05:04,523 Not literally, but Charlie Dean owns 124 00:05:04,526 --> 00:05:06,526 that feed store, so... 125 00:05:06,529 --> 00:05:08,476 - Are you saying I'm losing my job? - No. 126 00:05:08,479 --> 00:05:10,479 No, no, I'm saying 127 00:05:10,482 --> 00:05:12,526 you just got some fires to put out. 128 00:05:12,529 --> 00:05:15,281 - Well, what am I supposedto do? - Talk to the boosters. 129 00:05:15,284 --> 00:05:17,257 Tell 'em something encouraging. 130 00:05:17,260 --> 00:05:19,445 Yeah. Got it. 131 00:05:19,448 --> 00:05:22,296 And say it like your job depends on it. 132 00:05:23,324 --> 00:05:24,803 Not that it does. 133 00:05:25,898 --> 00:05:27,550 But it does. 134 00:05:29,512 --> 00:05:31,757 Watch out for the CyberToad. 135 00:05:31,760 --> 00:05:34,674 - What's a CyberToad? - The evil little robot frogs. 136 00:05:34,677 --> 00:05:37,421 Although they're only known as CyberToads in the west. 137 00:05:37,424 --> 00:05:39,765 - In Japan they're known as... - MechaGamas. 138 00:05:39,768 --> 00:05:41,420 Can I finish my own thoughts, please? 139 00:05:41,423 --> 00:05:42,944 He's very sensitive. 140 00:05:42,955 --> 00:05:45,750 I'm protective of my fun facts, too. 141 00:05:45,753 --> 00:05:47,695 I'm hungry. You wanna order something? 142 00:05:47,698 --> 00:05:50,382 - Chinese? - Little man, you want Chinese? 143 00:05:50,385 --> 00:05:53,429 - I don't know. I've never had Chinese food. - Really? 144 00:05:53,432 --> 00:05:55,203 We get it, like, two, three times a week. 145 00:05:55,206 --> 00:05:56,914 Chinese food three times a week? 146 00:05:56,917 --> 00:05:58,178 That seems excessive. 147 00:05:58,181 --> 00:06:00,109 How have you never had an egg roll? 148 00:06:00,112 --> 00:06:02,125 Mom, can I please be picked up later? 149 00:06:02,128 --> 00:06:04,867 No. Your meemaw's already on her way. 150 00:06:04,870 --> 00:06:07,348 But the people next door want me to try an egg roll. 151 00:06:07,351 --> 00:06:08,540 What people? 152 00:06:08,543 --> 00:06:09,805 Don't take food from strangers. 153 00:06:09,808 --> 00:06:11,895 They're not strangers. They're Oscar and Darren. 154 00:06:11,898 --> 00:06:14,093 Well, they're strangers to me. 155 00:06:14,096 --> 00:06:16,000 Well, maybe when Meemaw gets here, 156 00:06:16,003 --> 00:06:17,785 she can wait in the car for a few hours. 157 00:06:17,788 --> 00:06:20,289 That is not happening, and you know it. 158 00:06:20,292 --> 00:06:22,390 Can we at least have Chinese food for dinner? 159 00:06:22,393 --> 00:06:23,757 I'm making Rice-A-Roni. 160 00:06:23,760 --> 00:06:26,718 - Does that count? - Nothing Chinese ends in "a-roni." 161 00:06:26,721 --> 00:06:28,288 Well, their loss. 162 00:06:31,695 --> 00:06:33,801 Oh, I know that face. 163 00:06:33,804 --> 00:06:36,406 Heartburn? Gas? What are we working with? 164 00:06:36,409 --> 00:06:37,976 Not in the mood, Wayne. 165 00:06:37,979 --> 00:06:40,578 Are you in the mood for Tums? I could hook you up. 166 00:06:42,385 --> 00:06:44,114 Apparently, the football boosters think 167 00:06:44,117 --> 00:06:45,707 I'm not doing my job. 168 00:06:45,709 --> 00:06:47,937 Just 'cause they give a little money to the team... 169 00:06:47,940 --> 00:06:49,109 A lot of money. 170 00:06:49,112 --> 00:06:51,476 They give some amount of money to the team. 171 00:06:51,479 --> 00:06:52,765 And the new scoreboard. 172 00:06:52,768 --> 00:06:56,596 Okay. But I-I give my time, my talent, my sweat. 173 00:06:56,599 --> 00:06:59,117 You see any boosters out there doing two-a-day summer practice? 174 00:06:59,120 --> 00:07:00,835 - I do not. - Damn right. 175 00:07:00,838 --> 00:07:02,379 If they really want to help, you know what they could do? 176 00:07:02,381 --> 00:07:03,946 Give birth to stronger, faster kids, 177 00:07:03,949 --> 00:07:05,253 'cause theirs ain't cutting it. 178 00:07:05,256 --> 00:07:08,170 You know you're gonna have to talk to them, right? 179 00:07:08,173 --> 00:07:10,390 Yes. 180 00:07:10,393 --> 00:07:13,568 And you know you can't say that stuff about their kids, right? 181 00:07:13,571 --> 00:07:17,269 Well, what if it comes up organically? 182 00:07:17,272 --> 00:07:19,315 Maybe I should come. 183 00:07:19,318 --> 00:07:22,440 I'm not gonna insult their children. 184 00:07:22,442 --> 00:07:23,745 You sure? 185 00:07:23,747 --> 00:07:25,488 Okay, come. 186 00:07:33,592 --> 00:07:36,419 - Where's the coffee? - I finished it. 187 00:07:36,422 --> 00:07:39,249 When you finish a pot, you're supposed to make more. 188 00:07:39,252 --> 00:07:40,903 Oh, is that the rule? 189 00:07:40,906 --> 00:07:42,664 It is for him. 190 00:07:42,667 --> 00:07:44,058 Why are you reading my paper? 191 00:07:44,061 --> 00:07:47,062 Well, pardon me for keeping up on events of the day. 192 00:07:47,065 --> 00:07:50,843 - Tomorrow's headline: Father Strangles Son. - Good luck. 193 00:07:50,846 --> 00:07:53,283 My horoscope says "things are looking up." 194 00:07:54,556 --> 00:07:56,820 Well, don't you look nice. 195 00:07:56,823 --> 00:07:58,997 Nice and boring, thanks to you. 196 00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:01,218 Is everyone gonna be crabby today? 197 00:08:01,221 --> 00:08:02,655 I've been a delight. 198 00:08:02,658 --> 00:08:04,484 Dad, can we just leave? 199 00:08:04,487 --> 00:08:06,095 I haven't had my coffee yet. 200 00:08:06,098 --> 00:08:07,315 I'll give you a ride. 201 00:08:07,318 --> 00:08:08,839 Thanks. 202 00:08:08,842 --> 00:08:10,296 Where are the damn filters? 203 00:08:10,299 --> 00:08:13,257 They're in the cabinet, where they always are. 204 00:08:13,260 --> 00:08:15,738 These two, fighting like the Serbs and Croatians 205 00:08:15,741 --> 00:08:16,960 in Bosnia. 206 00:08:22,020 --> 00:08:23,585 Mom make you wear that? 207 00:08:23,588 --> 00:08:24,851 Yeah. 208 00:08:24,854 --> 00:08:27,625 She did the same thing to me with pleated khakis. 209 00:08:27,628 --> 00:08:29,846 I looked like Pastor Jeff. 210 00:08:29,849 --> 00:08:32,554 Well, she doesn't know that I brought a change. 211 00:08:32,557 --> 00:08:33,734 Good for you. 212 00:08:33,737 --> 00:08:36,607 - I tried cutting the khakis into shorts. - Did it help? 213 00:08:36,610 --> 00:08:38,703 No. I looked like Sheldon. 214 00:08:38,706 --> 00:08:41,142 That's tragic. 215 00:08:41,145 --> 00:08:43,710 You never get any glory without a little pain. 216 00:08:43,713 --> 00:08:46,192 I know we've had our share lately, 217 00:08:46,195 --> 00:08:48,632 but we've got the pieces in place for next year. 218 00:08:48,635 --> 00:08:52,028 With your support, we're gonna make it happen. 219 00:08:52,031 --> 00:08:55,023 I think we can agree that our boys are in good hands here. 220 00:08:55,026 --> 00:08:58,549 So thanks for coming out. Go, Wolves. 221 00:08:58,552 --> 00:08:59,899 I got a question. 222 00:08:59,902 --> 00:09:02,937 - Go ahead, Roy. - That game against Tyler. 223 00:09:02,940 --> 00:09:05,679 What in the hell were you thinking 224 00:09:05,682 --> 00:09:08,335 punting with a minute 24 on the clock? 225 00:09:08,338 --> 00:09:09,861 That's a fair question. 226 00:09:12,682 --> 00:09:14,247 Sure is. 227 00:09:14,249 --> 00:09:15,867 That was a tough one. 228 00:09:15,870 --> 00:09:17,750 But our offense was giving up 30 pounds 229 00:09:17,753 --> 00:09:19,318 to everyone across the line. 230 00:09:19,321 --> 00:09:24,007 And we had a quarterback who had an uneasy relationship 231 00:09:24,010 --> 00:09:27,971 with... with holding onto the ball. 232 00:09:28,605 --> 00:09:30,203 So you're blaming our kids? 233 00:09:30,206 --> 00:09:31,205 - Well... - No. 234 00:09:31,208 --> 00:09:32,207 - No? - No. 235 00:09:32,210 --> 00:09:33,312 No. 236 00:09:33,315 --> 00:09:35,195 Look, they're great kids. A lot of heart. 237 00:09:35,198 --> 00:09:37,437 They were getting killed out there. 238 00:09:37,440 --> 00:09:39,788 It's a coach's job to know when to pull back. 239 00:09:39,791 --> 00:09:41,710 So your strategy is to surrender. 240 00:09:41,713 --> 00:09:43,946 - That's not what I'm saying. - You know who don't surrender? 241 00:09:43,948 --> 00:09:45,905 That new coach they got up at Carthage. 242 00:09:45,908 --> 00:09:48,070 - You know he played for the Packers. - Mm-hmm. 243 00:09:48,073 --> 00:09:50,030 Oh, come on. He played for two minutes 244 00:09:50,033 --> 00:09:51,990 and broke his collarbone, and that was his career. 245 00:09:51,992 --> 00:09:53,727 Well, that's two minutes more than you played. 246 00:09:55,863 --> 00:09:57,205 Help me. 247 00:09:58,560 --> 00:10:01,062 Vince Lombardi never played for the pros. 248 00:10:01,065 --> 00:10:02,891 So now this clown is Vince Lombardi? 249 00:10:05,495 --> 00:10:07,921 I'm not Lombardi, but I don't need to put up with this crap. 250 00:10:07,924 --> 00:10:09,898 Wait, what I think we're all seeing 251 00:10:09,901 --> 00:10:10,921 is the passion 252 00:10:10,924 --> 00:10:13,118 - that Coach Cooper brings to the field. - No, what you're seeing 253 00:10:13,120 --> 00:10:15,585 is me running out of patience. Meeting's over. 254 00:10:15,588 --> 00:10:17,283 Oh, there it is. 255 00:10:17,286 --> 00:10:19,593 The Cooper Surrender. 256 00:10:19,596 --> 00:10:22,292 - The Cooper Surrender! - Bye-bye. 257 00:10:43,549 --> 00:10:45,296 What's the matter? 258 00:10:45,299 --> 00:10:47,255 Everything. 259 00:10:47,258 --> 00:10:48,825 Did somebody die? 260 00:10:49,720 --> 00:10:51,067 No. 261 00:10:51,070 --> 00:10:52,940 Then we can fix it. 262 00:10:52,943 --> 00:10:56,379 Come on. Come on. 263 00:10:56,382 --> 00:10:58,460 I was wearing the new skirt, 264 00:10:58,463 --> 00:11:00,308 and I felt really good. 265 00:11:00,311 --> 00:11:01,804 Cute skirt. 266 00:11:01,807 --> 00:11:03,241 Thanks. 267 00:11:03,244 --> 00:11:05,986 Your legs are so hairy. 268 00:11:06,824 --> 00:11:09,172 - Ew. - Gross. 269 00:11:09,175 --> 00:11:12,524 - Those bitches. - Thank you. 270 00:11:12,527 --> 00:11:15,375 Is that why you got on sweat pants? 271 00:11:15,378 --> 00:11:17,515 It gets worse. 272 00:11:17,518 --> 00:11:18,890 Oh, boy. 273 00:11:18,893 --> 00:11:21,914 I came home, and I was in the bathroom, 274 00:11:21,917 --> 00:11:24,351 and I saw Mom's leg razor. 275 00:11:24,354 --> 00:11:25,962 Oh, no. Please tell me 276 00:11:25,965 --> 00:11:27,530 you also saw shaving cream. 277 00:11:27,533 --> 00:11:29,707 - I didn't. - Soap? 278 00:11:29,710 --> 00:11:32,885 Water? Lotion? 279 00:11:32,888 --> 00:11:34,411 Anything? 280 00:11:39,750 --> 00:11:41,437 Hey, it's Darren. 281 00:11:44,174 --> 00:11:45,391 Hello. 282 00:11:45,394 --> 00:11:47,481 Any chance you play Dungeons and Dragons? 283 00:11:47,484 --> 00:11:49,726 And how. I once created a campaign 284 00:11:49,729 --> 00:11:52,789 set in 1940s London where Alan Turing was a character, 285 00:11:52,792 --> 00:11:54,792 and I had the mathematicians be magic users 286 00:11:54,795 --> 00:11:56,476 with theorems instead of spells. 287 00:11:56,479 --> 00:11:57,870 The intelligence officers were clerics... 288 00:11:57,872 --> 00:11:59,841 "Yes" works. We're playing tonight and we're down 289 00:11:59,844 --> 00:12:01,334 a magic user. You in? 290 00:12:01,337 --> 00:12:02,505 When are you playing? 291 00:12:02,508 --> 00:12:04,537 We start at 7:00. We'll go till whenever. 292 00:12:04,540 --> 00:12:06,599 My mom didn't let me stay past 6:00 yesterday. 293 00:12:06,602 --> 00:12:09,388 - She'll never let me stay till "whenever." - Bummer. 294 00:12:09,391 --> 00:12:11,435 Mm. You could play at my house. 295 00:12:11,438 --> 00:12:13,699 - No. - Bummer. 296 00:12:13,702 --> 00:12:15,789 I've never said that before. Did it sound cool? 297 00:12:15,792 --> 00:12:18,229 - No. - Bummer. 298 00:12:23,527 --> 00:12:26,267 Oh, before you open that, could you pick up Sheldon 299 00:12:26,270 --> 00:12:28,618 - so I can get dinner on? - Do I have to? 300 00:12:28,621 --> 00:12:32,100 I'm sorry. I guess I'll do all the parenting around here. 301 00:12:32,103 --> 00:12:35,235 I'm having a hell of a day. Can I get five minutes' peace? 302 00:12:35,238 --> 00:12:37,373 When do I get five minutes' peace? 303 00:12:37,376 --> 00:12:40,490 Honestly, can you just take this one thing off my plate? 304 00:12:44,782 --> 00:12:46,173 Hello? 305 00:12:46,176 --> 00:12:48,318 Dad, my friends are playing Dungeons and Dragons. 306 00:12:48,321 --> 00:12:50,059 Can I please stay the night in my dorm room? 307 00:12:50,062 --> 00:12:51,552 I promise it's safe. 308 00:12:51,555 --> 00:12:53,425 Fine with me. 309 00:12:53,428 --> 00:12:55,645 Thank you. Bye. 310 00:12:55,648 --> 00:12:57,692 That was easy. 311 00:12:57,695 --> 00:12:59,295 - Who was that? - Sheldon. 312 00:12:59,298 --> 00:13:00,904 He's gonna stay the night in his dorm. 313 00:13:00,907 --> 00:13:03,162 Why would you let him do that? 314 00:13:03,165 --> 00:13:04,731 One more thing off your plate. 315 00:13:11,677 --> 00:13:13,285 You did not just tell our son 316 00:13:13,288 --> 00:13:15,513 that he could stay the night by himself. 317 00:13:15,516 --> 00:13:18,373 The campus is safe, and he's not by himself, he's with friends. 318 00:13:18,376 --> 00:13:20,333 Friends that we don't know. 319 00:13:20,336 --> 00:13:21,849 What if there is alcohol? 320 00:13:21,852 --> 00:13:23,818 Then they're gonna get a lot of fun facts 321 00:13:23,821 --> 00:13:25,604 about the history of fermented beverages. 322 00:13:25,607 --> 00:13:27,432 I am serious. 323 00:13:27,435 --> 00:13:29,060 So am I. How else would I know 324 00:13:29,063 --> 00:13:30,655 that monkeys get drunk by eating rotten fruit 325 00:13:30,657 --> 00:13:31,917 off the jungle floor? 326 00:13:31,920 --> 00:13:34,921 He is not ready for this kind of situation. 327 00:13:34,924 --> 00:13:36,490 Mary, he's a good kid. 328 00:13:36,493 --> 00:13:38,193 He's not gonna drink anything he shouldn't. 329 00:13:38,196 --> 00:13:39,805 And if he cared about peer pressure, 330 00:13:39,808 --> 00:13:40,983 he wouldn't wear a bow tie. 331 00:13:43,359 --> 00:13:45,359 I don't know. I don't think I should. 332 00:13:45,362 --> 00:13:47,014 It's just root beer. 333 00:13:47,017 --> 00:13:49,943 This late in the evening, my mother wouldn't approve. 334 00:13:49,946 --> 00:13:51,216 Okay. 335 00:13:51,219 --> 00:13:53,052 Then again, I didn't think they'd let me stay, 336 00:13:53,055 --> 00:13:55,534 - and they did, so maybe it's fine. - I know, 337 00:13:55,537 --> 00:13:58,584 - why don't you roll for it? - Ooh, good idea. 338 00:14:00,185 --> 00:14:02,189 Seventeen. Guess I'll have it. 339 00:14:04,938 --> 00:14:06,198 We playing? 340 00:14:06,201 --> 00:14:08,105 Hold on. Do you have a coaster? 341 00:14:08,108 --> 00:14:10,238 Yeah, it's in the china cabinet. 342 00:14:10,240 --> 00:14:12,576 And where would that be? 343 00:14:14,941 --> 00:14:17,289 You're good at Band-Aids. 344 00:14:17,291 --> 00:14:20,031 I've had practice on Sheldon. 345 00:14:20,033 --> 00:14:22,250 He's a fragile boy. 346 00:14:22,252 --> 00:14:25,490 - I don't want to go back to school tomorrow. - You have to! 347 00:14:25,493 --> 00:14:27,990 You can't let them win. 348 00:14:27,993 --> 00:14:29,515 But wear pants. 349 00:14:29,518 --> 00:14:30,908 This is hard to look at. 350 00:14:30,911 --> 00:14:32,826 I heard women in Europe don't shave. 351 00:14:32,829 --> 00:14:34,393 Maybe I should move there. 352 00:14:34,396 --> 00:14:36,089 They also drink warm beer. 353 00:14:36,092 --> 00:14:37,833 They don't know what they're doing. 354 00:14:38,966 --> 00:14:40,935 Will you show me how to do it the right way? 355 00:14:40,938 --> 00:14:42,764 Shave? Yeah. 356 00:14:42,767 --> 00:14:45,071 Drink? Your dad's the expert. 357 00:14:45,074 --> 00:14:46,599 Boys have it so easy. 358 00:14:46,602 --> 00:14:48,459 They can be as hairy as they want. 359 00:14:48,462 --> 00:14:50,310 Yeah, but they gotta walk around being dumb 360 00:14:50,313 --> 00:14:51,584 and smelly all the time. 361 00:14:51,586 --> 00:14:52,748 Who wants that? 362 00:14:52,751 --> 00:14:54,146 So I have to shave forever, 363 00:14:54,149 --> 00:14:56,283 then marry someone who's dumb and smelly? 364 00:14:56,286 --> 00:14:58,983 Not necessarily, but... 365 00:14:58,985 --> 00:15:00,636 there's a good chance. 366 00:15:00,638 --> 00:15:02,060 That's depressing. 367 00:15:02,063 --> 00:15:04,164 That's where the drinking comes in. 368 00:15:07,482 --> 00:15:08,731 Where you going? 369 00:15:08,733 --> 00:15:10,482 To get our son. 370 00:15:10,485 --> 00:15:12,790 Mary, leave him alone. He's fine. 371 00:15:12,793 --> 00:15:14,693 We have no idea who he's with, 372 00:15:14,696 --> 00:15:16,217 and you don't even care. 373 00:15:16,220 --> 00:15:19,743 You're right. Do whatever you want. 374 00:15:19,746 --> 00:15:21,398 What is your problem? 375 00:15:21,401 --> 00:15:22,837 Doesn't matter. 376 00:15:23,969 --> 00:15:25,490 Hey. 377 00:15:26,930 --> 00:15:31,718 If something is going on, tell me. 378 00:15:34,959 --> 00:15:36,698 They're coming after me at work. 379 00:15:36,701 --> 00:15:38,483 Who? 380 00:15:38,486 --> 00:15:41,968 The boosters. They want a new coach. 381 00:15:44,774 --> 00:15:46,164 Are you getting fired? 382 00:15:46,167 --> 00:15:50,258 I don't know. Maybe. 383 00:15:56,404 --> 00:15:57,864 Don't you have to go? 384 00:16:06,649 --> 00:16:08,427 I'm sorry. 385 00:16:21,492 --> 00:16:23,190 Thank you. 386 00:16:28,711 --> 00:16:30,406 "You open the gate of the crypt, 387 00:16:30,409 --> 00:16:32,901 and you see two identical elven princesses." 388 00:16:32,904 --> 00:16:34,382 Sheldon, what do you do? 389 00:16:34,384 --> 00:16:37,255 I-I don't feel so good. 390 00:16:37,257 --> 00:16:38,471 What's going on? 391 00:16:38,474 --> 00:16:40,214 My stomach hurts. 392 00:16:40,216 --> 00:16:41,607 How much did you eat? 393 00:16:41,609 --> 00:16:43,306 Well... 394 00:16:48,943 --> 00:16:50,050 Dude. 395 00:16:50,052 --> 00:16:51,878 I need to lie down. 396 00:16:53,180 --> 00:16:54,740 Oh, I don't want to throw up. 397 00:16:54,743 --> 00:16:56,177 We don't want you to throw up. 398 00:16:56,180 --> 00:16:58,189 - If he throws up, I throw up. - Well, what should we do? 399 00:16:58,191 --> 00:16:59,581 I don't know. Why are you asking me? 400 00:16:59,583 --> 00:17:01,105 You're the closest to a mom here. 401 00:17:01,107 --> 00:17:02,541 I don't know. Call his mom. 402 00:17:02,543 --> 00:17:03,933 Oh, no, don't call my mom. 403 00:17:03,935 --> 00:17:05,607 She'll never let me do this again. 404 00:17:05,610 --> 00:17:07,574 Get him something to throw up in. 405 00:17:08,592 --> 00:17:09,974 No, not the Skittles. 406 00:17:11,117 --> 00:17:13,073 Here, here. 407 00:17:13,075 --> 00:17:14,509 Here. 408 00:17:14,511 --> 00:17:17,295 Next door there's an emergency Alka-Seltzer tablet 409 00:17:17,297 --> 00:17:18,905 in my bathroom medicine chest. 410 00:17:18,907 --> 00:17:19,906 You have a bathroom? 411 00:17:19,908 --> 00:17:21,125 Why does he get a bathroom? 412 00:17:21,127 --> 00:17:22,534 Go throw up in your own bathroom. 413 00:17:22,537 --> 00:17:25,263 I don't know if I can make it. 414 00:17:27,220 --> 00:17:30,569 Get his door! 415 00:17:30,571 --> 00:17:31,744 It's locked. 416 00:17:31,746 --> 00:17:33,185 Key. 417 00:17:33,188 --> 00:17:35,094 - I'm not gonna make it. - Please make it. 418 00:17:35,097 --> 00:17:38,272 What is going on? Sheldon, are you okay? 419 00:17:38,274 --> 00:17:39,768 My stomach hurts. 420 00:17:39,771 --> 00:17:41,449 He's gonna throw up. 421 00:17:41,451 --> 00:17:43,748 Did you give him beer? Did they give you beer?! 422 00:17:43,751 --> 00:17:45,018 Just root beer. 423 00:17:45,020 --> 00:17:46,826 It's gonna be okay, baby. 424 00:17:46,829 --> 00:17:48,611 Oh... 425 00:17:48,614 --> 00:17:50,109 Why is it so colorful? 426 00:17:50,112 --> 00:17:52,678 Too many... Skittles. 427 00:17:53,945 --> 00:17:59,646 - Synced and corrected by VitoSilans - ... www.Addic7ed.com ...