1 00:00:17,551 --> 00:00:19,891 How much longer is this gonna take? 2 00:00:19,931 --> 00:00:21,611 I don't know, how long does it take a man 3 00:00:21,631 --> 00:00:24,571 - to become a God, Lana? - I don't know, ten minutes? 4 00:00:24,601 --> 00:00:25,641 I still don't understand 5 00:00:25,671 --> 00:00:27,711 why I have to be this naked in front of Mother. 6 00:00:27,740 --> 00:00:29,557 I don't think you all appreciate what I've done here. 7 00:00:29,558 --> 00:00:32,518 Billions of wires, carrying trillions of data packets, 8 00:00:32,519 --> 00:00:35,609 perfectly and delicately calibrated to dive into the wet, 9 00:00:35,610 --> 00:00:39,599 - gross mind of a man! - It all looks pretty mad scientist-y. 10 00:00:39,629 --> 00:00:41,699 Oh, you've even got one of those big power switches. 11 00:00:41,739 --> 00:00:43,509 That is a precision device! 12 00:00:43,539 --> 00:00:45,109 That I've been saving for something weird. 13 00:00:45,139 --> 00:00:46,459 So, Krieger, how does this work? 14 00:00:46,489 --> 00:00:47,899 You gonna transfer his memory banks 15 00:00:47,929 --> 00:00:50,719 into my neuro-brain stuff or whatever? 16 00:00:50,759 --> 00:00:54,359 - I call it the reverse Frankenstein. - Okay, definitely mad scientist-y. 17 00:00:54,399 --> 00:00:57,299 And you're certain this will give us the information we need 18 00:00:57,329 --> 00:00:58,799 to rebuild the device IIA stole? 19 00:00:58,839 --> 00:01:01,579 I'm certain it might if his brain doesn't explode. 20 00:01:01,609 --> 00:01:03,479 Wait, which "his?" Am I the "his?" 21 00:01:03,509 --> 00:01:07,031 - More importantly, are we in the splash zone? - Shh. Quiet! 22 00:01:07,056 --> 00:01:09,489 I need total silence to initiate the sequence. 23 00:01:15,469 --> 00:01:16,769 Sorry I'm late. 24 00:01:16,773 --> 00:01:19,549 I was volunteering at what I thought was a soup kitchen... 25 00:01:19,579 --> 00:01:20,549 - Shh! - God dammit! 26 00:01:20,579 --> 00:01:23,549 Ooh, right, sorry. Wait, what are we doing? 27 00:01:23,589 --> 00:01:25,629 This guy has some science thingy in his head 28 00:01:25,659 --> 00:01:27,359 that we need for money, 29 00:01:27,389 --> 00:01:29,309 but he's in a coma and we're almost out of money, 30 00:01:29,339 --> 00:01:31,763 - so Archer's gonna go into his brain. - We're broke? 31 00:01:31,769 --> 00:01:33,709 Is that why the vending machine costs money now? 32 00:01:33,739 --> 00:01:37,379 - No, they just finally fixed it. - We're technically not broke. 33 00:01:37,409 --> 00:01:38,919 Just operating on a leaner budget 34 00:01:38,949 --> 00:01:40,989 now that Robert is tightening the spigots. 35 00:01:41,019 --> 00:01:42,829 Well, money doesn't come from spigots. 36 00:01:42,859 --> 00:01:44,779 So that might be part of the problem right there. 37 00:01:44,799 --> 00:01:48,369 That, and how much did you spend on this thingamabob? 38 00:01:48,399 --> 00:01:50,309 Well, you gotta spend money diving into brains 39 00:01:50,339 --> 00:01:51,809 to make money diving into brains. 40 00:01:51,839 --> 00:01:55,549 Speaking of thingamabob, do I need to be hooked up down there? 41 00:01:55,579 --> 00:01:57,619 Great question. Ka-thunk. 42 00:01:59,659 --> 00:02:02,904 It's working. It's working! 43 00:02:02,929 --> 00:02:05,569 Here we go, buddy. See you on your insides. 44 00:02:05,599 --> 00:02:06,599 No, no, no, no, no...! 45 00:02:08,879 --> 00:02:10,615 Whoa. 46 00:02:10,949 --> 00:02:12,919 Wait, what happened? Where did he go? 47 00:02:12,949 --> 00:02:17,352 If by he, you mean me, well then, ta-da! 48 00:02:17,799 --> 00:02:20,639 Where am I? I'm getting a sex dungeon vibe. 49 00:02:20,669 --> 00:02:23,739 - You're not far off. - Metaphorically or geographically. 50 00:02:23,769 --> 00:02:25,339 - Did it work? Am I in? - Nope. 51 00:02:25,379 --> 00:02:27,949 But, side note, I know how to cure comas now. 52 00:02:27,979 --> 00:02:30,581 Would have been useful a couple of years ago. 53 00:02:32,929 --> 00:02:34,987 The soup kitchen was a sex club. 54 00:03:06,026 --> 00:03:11,736 sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ Addic7ed.com ~ 55 00:03:14,625 --> 00:03:16,769 Can you remember anything about who you are? 56 00:03:16,794 --> 00:03:18,310 - Where you come from? - Uh... 57 00:03:18,350 --> 00:03:20,820 I think maybe, your mom's butt? 58 00:03:20,850 --> 00:03:24,430 - Ooh, a funny scientist. - Aw, come on. I have my moments. 59 00:03:24,460 --> 00:03:26,254 I'm a scientist? Nice. 60 00:03:26,289 --> 00:03:28,470 It's possible the massive electric shock 61 00:03:28,500 --> 00:03:30,270 may have fried a few of his circuits. 62 00:03:30,300 --> 00:03:33,880 - Look, science isn't an exact science. - Okay, then let's start simple. 63 00:03:33,904 --> 00:03:37,350 - Do you remember your name? - Uh, no. 64 00:03:37,380 --> 00:03:40,590 Bet my name's something cool though, like, Colt. 65 00:03:40,630 --> 00:03:43,000 - Yeah. Let's go with Colt. - Damn. That is cool. 66 00:03:43,030 --> 00:03:44,390 And you're sure you don't want us 67 00:03:44,400 --> 00:03:46,040 to call you Dr. Something or other? 68 00:03:46,070 --> 00:03:48,770 Ugh, lame. Trust me, Colt is fine. 69 00:03:48,810 --> 00:03:51,880 Wait! I'm getting something. A small blue house, 70 00:03:51,910 --> 00:03:55,690 - two children, and a wife... - Ugh, enough. 71 00:03:55,720 --> 00:03:57,240 Colt, you're a very important scientist 72 00:03:57,264 --> 00:03:59,400 on a very important mission, okay? 73 00:03:59,430 --> 00:04:01,870 To redesign the device you were transporting in Moldova. 74 00:04:01,900 --> 00:04:05,910 Can do, I'll just grab this pen and paper, and voilá. 75 00:04:05,940 --> 00:04:08,580 - Not bad. - But terrible riding form. 76 00:04:08,610 --> 00:04:09,950 Oh, I guess I can't do. 77 00:04:09,980 --> 00:04:12,320 But you know the device we're talking about? 78 00:04:12,350 --> 00:04:14,070 - What does it do? - Well, if memory serves... 79 00:04:14,094 --> 00:04:16,500 - And it mostly doesn't. - It's an energy source. 80 00:04:16,530 --> 00:04:18,630 Properly used, it could eliminate our dependence 81 00:04:18,670 --> 00:04:21,770 - on fossil fuels altogether. - What about improperly used? 82 00:04:21,810 --> 00:04:24,450 It could wipe out all life on the planet. 83 00:04:24,480 --> 00:04:27,420 - Science, you crazy bitch. - Yeah. 84 00:04:27,450 --> 00:04:30,020 Oh, God, that must be why IIA wants it. 85 00:04:30,060 --> 00:04:32,060 It's a classic "evil villain destroys the world 86 00:04:32,090 --> 00:04:34,400 with some sort of weird doomsday device" plot. 87 00:04:34,430 --> 00:04:35,870 - Obviously. - Oh, hey, wait. 88 00:04:35,900 --> 00:04:37,540 I'm remembering some other stuff. 89 00:04:37,570 --> 00:04:39,780 - One, metal rules. - Preach, brother! 90 00:04:39,810 --> 00:04:41,650 And two, I left my notes on a memory stick 91 00:04:41,680 --> 00:04:43,780 hidden in the device, along with a homing beacon. 92 00:04:43,820 --> 00:04:46,960 Did I have a talky-talk on me when you picked me up? 93 00:04:46,990 --> 00:04:49,260 Okay, I might be able to track it. 94 00:04:49,500 --> 00:04:52,940 - Whoa, who is this hot piece of ass? - That would be you. 95 00:04:52,970 --> 00:04:55,540 Ah, here we go. The device is in Singapore. 96 00:04:55,580 --> 00:04:59,980 - IIA's headquarters are in Singapore. - I'll get my checkbook. 97 00:05:04,507 --> 00:05:06,139 That's my room service! 98 00:05:06,164 --> 00:05:09,438 - We just got here. - I preordered it from the plane phone. 99 00:05:10,453 --> 00:05:13,483 Damn. How do you say "Bitchin'" in Singaporean? 100 00:05:13,508 --> 00:05:16,520 Actually, the primary language here is Mandarin. 101 00:05:16,550 --> 00:05:18,620 Did that feel good? Making me feel small? 102 00:05:18,650 --> 00:05:20,930 - Yes, it did. - This place is incredible. 103 00:05:20,960 --> 00:05:24,530 This was almost our honeymoon. Maybe an anniversary? 104 00:05:24,570 --> 00:05:26,840 Oh, sure, yeah, maybe. Hey, where's Ray? 105 00:05:26,870 --> 00:05:29,190 Who knows? He's been asking for a lot of time off lately. 106 00:05:29,214 --> 00:05:31,610 For some family emergency or something. 107 00:05:31,650 --> 00:05:33,080 As if four cats are family. 108 00:05:33,120 --> 00:05:36,490 I'm all for a successful mission, but first class tickets, 109 00:05:36,520 --> 00:05:38,090 and a penthouse with room service? 110 00:05:38,130 --> 00:05:40,500 We need to talk about how much all this is costing. 111 00:05:40,530 --> 00:05:42,030 Later. Everyone, listen up. 112 00:05:42,070 --> 00:05:45,470 Lana, Cyril, and I will survey IIA and develop an entrance strategy. 113 00:05:45,474 --> 00:05:47,950 Okay, this will ping the homing beacon, I think. 114 00:05:47,980 --> 00:05:51,020 - Still a bit fuzzy on the science. - That's great. 115 00:05:51,050 --> 00:05:52,560 Krieger, you stay here with Colt, 116 00:05:52,590 --> 00:05:54,590 and try to jog his memory for more information. 117 00:05:54,630 --> 00:05:56,513 Hey, I'll race you to remember. 118 00:05:56,538 --> 00:05:59,078 - Hey, I am a funny scientist. - Eh. 119 00:05:59,230 --> 00:06:02,710 - And, Mother... - There has to be a bar around here. 120 00:06:02,740 --> 00:06:04,850 Uh, keep doing what you're doing. 121 00:06:04,880 --> 00:06:06,920 And, Robert, you're on point here at HQ. 122 00:06:06,950 --> 00:06:10,660 - So what are they doing here? - Um, comic relief. 123 00:06:10,690 --> 00:06:15,030 - Thank you so much. - Ah! Are you tipping him $500? 124 00:06:15,070 --> 00:06:16,770 Relax. It's my money. 125 00:06:16,800 --> 00:06:18,880 And sometimes I like to give service people a thrill. 126 00:06:18,904 --> 00:06:21,710 I'm sorry, Miss, was my service unsatisfactory? 127 00:06:21,750 --> 00:06:23,550 Perhaps this is generous in your country, 128 00:06:23,580 --> 00:06:26,660 but in Singapore, it's... how would you Americans say it? 129 00:06:26,690 --> 00:06:28,160 - Jack shit. - What? 130 00:06:28,190 --> 00:06:30,700 Singapore is an extremely wealthy country. 131 00:06:30,730 --> 00:06:34,072 - And there he goes again. - Ha! Your money means less. 132 00:06:35,242 --> 00:06:36,672 Wait, am I poor here? 133 00:06:37,080 --> 00:06:40,180 Do you really have to bring that up right now? 134 00:06:40,220 --> 00:06:42,690 What? All I said was, "Trouble in hell," 135 00:06:42,720 --> 00:06:45,630 as a play on "trouble in paradise," because your husband sucks, 136 00:06:45,660 --> 00:06:48,530 and it seems like you're avoiding him, which, now that I think about it, 137 00:06:48,570 --> 00:06:52,140 - I should've said, "success in hell?" - I don't want to talk about it. 138 00:06:52,170 --> 00:06:53,780 What happened? Did you tell him about 139 00:06:53,810 --> 00:06:56,227 - tongue-wrestling that dude in Japan? - Jesus, Archer! 140 00:06:56,228 --> 00:06:58,220 - You cheated on Robert? - No! 141 00:06:58,250 --> 00:07:01,930 Well, I almost, sort of, kissed someone else. 142 00:07:01,960 --> 00:07:04,200 - Oh, my God. - But that's all that happened! 143 00:07:04,230 --> 00:07:06,170 - Besides the cuddling. - Not helpful. 144 00:07:06,200 --> 00:07:09,110 Okay, how about now? 145 00:07:09,140 --> 00:07:11,850 No, I don't think the jogging's working. 146 00:07:11,880 --> 00:07:14,720 Hey, what if you put me back in the coma and woke me up again? 147 00:07:14,750 --> 00:07:18,030 - A hard reset. - That's just crazy enough to work. 148 00:07:18,060 --> 00:07:19,860 Or not work. Pretty 50/50. 149 00:07:19,900 --> 00:07:21,730 I think I remember liking those odds. 150 00:07:21,770 --> 00:07:23,970 - God, I love science! - Well, I don't. 151 00:07:24,000 --> 00:07:26,281 Dammit, Lana, if you're making a cuckold of Robert, 152 00:07:26,305 --> 00:07:28,510 - he deserves to know! - That is not what's happening! 153 00:07:28,511 --> 00:07:29,880 And who are you to judge? 154 00:07:29,920 --> 00:07:32,690 - You and I both cheated on each other! - And it broke me! 155 00:07:32,720 --> 00:07:33,960 Not a real high bar. 156 00:07:33,984 --> 00:07:37,130 Cyril, I'm sorry for the past, okay? But this is different. 157 00:07:37,160 --> 00:07:39,130 I am not the same person I was back then. 158 00:07:39,170 --> 00:07:41,240 Also, I never told you about any of the times 159 00:07:41,270 --> 00:07:42,840 I cheated on you when we were together, 160 00:07:42,880 --> 00:07:45,180 and trust me, Lana, you were way happier for it. 161 00:07:45,210 --> 00:07:47,790 Oh, you never had to tell me. 162 00:07:48,990 --> 00:07:51,110 Shh, follow me. We're gonna go in the bedroom. 163 00:07:51,134 --> 00:07:52,830 Oh, so anyway, 164 00:07:52,860 --> 00:07:55,670 uh, this is what a king-size bed looks like. 165 00:07:55,700 --> 00:07:58,740 I'll see you out, Mrs. My Dentist. 166 00:07:58,770 --> 00:08:00,950 She fell for it! 167 00:08:00,980 --> 00:08:02,310 Let's just focus on the mission... 168 00:08:02,350 --> 00:08:06,290 infiltrating this weirdly casual botanical garden. 169 00:08:06,320 --> 00:08:07,690 Wait, I think we did it. 170 00:08:07,730 --> 00:08:10,260 This is the top spy agency in the world. 171 00:08:10,300 --> 00:08:11,730 You can't just waltz right in. 172 00:08:11,770 --> 00:08:13,870 Really? Because it seems to be working. 173 00:08:16,691 --> 00:08:19,493 - Bingo. All... - Clear! 174 00:08:19,518 --> 00:08:20,820 What the hell are you doing? 175 00:08:20,850 --> 00:08:23,190 Uh, putting the ghost back in the meat suit. 176 00:08:23,220 --> 00:08:24,930 Going again! 177 00:08:24,960 --> 00:08:28,600 1 Bukit Batok Street, 25, Singapore, 658882! 178 00:08:28,630 --> 00:08:30,170 That's my address. I lived here! 179 00:08:30,200 --> 00:08:34,680 Also, I talked to God. She is real, and she is pissed. 180 00:08:34,710 --> 00:08:36,980 - Sounds like my kind of broad. - Okay. 181 00:08:37,020 --> 00:08:39,620 Go to that address and see if he remembers anything else. 182 00:08:39,660 --> 00:08:41,290 We'll stay here and handle the comms. 183 00:08:41,330 --> 00:08:43,260 Okay, are you sure you know how? 184 00:08:43,300 --> 00:08:46,200 - Go! - Don't worry, we've got this. 185 00:08:46,240 --> 00:08:48,640 Sterling? Sterling, it's me. 186 00:08:48,670 --> 00:08:51,350 Sorry, Malory, we have a similar system at my company. 187 00:08:51,380 --> 00:08:54,549 - I think you're on mute. - Turn it up. Sterling? 188 00:08:54,574 --> 00:08:56,290 Sterling! Sterling! 189 00:08:56,320 --> 00:08:57,920 And to speak, you gotta hold down the... 190 00:08:57,944 --> 00:09:02,130 If you move that hand another inch, you won't have it anymore. 191 00:09:05,710 --> 00:09:08,010 Thanks for joining the IIA team. 192 00:09:08,050 --> 00:09:10,720 Have a seat and fill out this application. 193 00:09:10,750 --> 00:09:13,945 - Orientation will start shortly. - Uh, okay. 194 00:09:14,160 --> 00:09:16,900 Well, well, well, look who just waltzed right in. 195 00:09:16,930 --> 00:09:18,230 We didn't have a choice. 196 00:09:18,270 --> 00:09:20,370 Some IIA drone handed us cucumber waters 197 00:09:20,400 --> 00:09:22,410 and told us not to miss the orientation. 198 00:09:22,440 --> 00:09:24,780 And he complimented my surveilling. 199 00:09:24,810 --> 00:09:27,650 Looks like this is some sort of recruitment event. 200 00:09:27,690 --> 00:09:29,890 Oh, they must be poaching agents all over the industry. 201 00:09:29,920 --> 00:09:31,760 Welcome. Hey, y'all, come on in. 202 00:09:31,790 --> 00:09:33,030 Come on in, welcome. 203 00:09:33,060 --> 00:09:34,830 All right, let's fill up from back to front. 204 00:09:34,870 --> 00:09:36,370 - Wait, Ray? - Archer! 205 00:09:36,400 --> 00:09:39,240 Uh, this isn't what it looks like. 206 00:09:39,270 --> 00:09:41,410 Unless it looks like I'm working for IIA, 207 00:09:41,450 --> 00:09:43,280 because then, yeah. 208 00:09:43,320 --> 00:09:45,622 Although technically I'm temp to perm. 209 00:09:48,822 --> 00:09:51,433 Welcome to the IIA family. 210 00:09:51,458 --> 00:09:53,936 You're about to start the most exciting journey 211 00:09:53,961 --> 00:09:57,061 of your lives. To be honest, I'm jealous. 212 00:09:57,101 --> 00:09:59,901 Ray, what in the Harold Cole? You're working for IIA? 213 00:09:59,941 --> 00:10:01,134 It's not personal. 214 00:10:01,135 --> 00:10:03,941 I just need a back-up plan in case the agency goes down. 215 00:10:03,981 --> 00:10:05,751 So you've been commuting back and forth 216 00:10:05,781 --> 00:10:07,281 to work part-time in Singapore? 217 00:10:07,321 --> 00:10:10,691 I just borrow Robert's plane. I mean, that way it's free 99. 218 00:10:10,721 --> 00:10:14,031 IIA may be the world's leading spy agency, 219 00:10:14,061 --> 00:10:15,901 but we only have one mission... 220 00:10:15,956 --> 00:10:18,186 to make the world a better place. 221 00:10:18,211 --> 00:10:21,911 Ugh, why do all billionaires have this gross savior complex? 222 00:10:21,951 --> 00:10:23,651 You're married to a billionaire. 223 00:10:23,681 --> 00:10:24,851 - For now. - Shut it. 224 00:10:24,891 --> 00:10:26,131 What are y'all talking about? 225 00:10:26,161 --> 00:10:28,131 - Lana cheated on Robert. - We just cuddled! 226 00:10:28,161 --> 00:10:30,731 Which is emotional cheating, which is way worse! 227 00:10:30,761 --> 00:10:33,801 - Yeah, she's a monster. - Oh, my God. I want to die. 228 00:10:33,841 --> 00:10:37,211 And I want deets! God, I have missed the hot goss. 229 00:10:37,241 --> 00:10:41,121 Home sweet home. I guess I'm not married with kids. 230 00:10:41,151 --> 00:10:45,066 Hmm, this is your place? Ooh and ah. 231 00:10:45,091 --> 00:10:48,201 As in, I'm in awe of how eww it is. 232 00:10:48,231 --> 00:10:49,551 I guess if I lived in Singapore, 233 00:10:49,575 --> 00:10:51,671 I'd have to live in a hellhole like this. 234 00:10:51,711 --> 00:10:55,081 - Probably drowning in my own urine. - Oops, rent notice. 235 00:10:55,111 --> 00:10:57,821 Damn, my rent is $12,000 per month? 236 00:10:57,851 --> 00:11:01,091 - Um, wait. Is that a lot? - Yes! 237 00:11:01,131 --> 00:11:05,271 - Whoa, sweet guitars! - Right? I hope they're mine. 238 00:11:05,301 --> 00:11:08,941 - Does any of this spark anything? - Oh, not yet. 239 00:11:08,971 --> 00:11:12,211 - Oh, no! No! No! - What? 240 00:11:12,251 --> 00:11:15,121 My name's not Colt. It's Jeremy! 241 00:11:15,151 --> 00:11:17,691 - Ugh. - Wait, what's on the back of that? 242 00:11:17,731 --> 00:11:19,161 - Numbers. - Yes! 243 00:11:19,191 --> 00:11:22,371 - Location coordinates, to be exact. - Let's roll out, bitches. 244 00:11:22,401 --> 00:11:25,171 Hold on, I feel like there has to be something else. 245 00:11:25,211 --> 00:11:26,981 I think this might be important. 246 00:11:27,011 --> 00:11:28,181 Okay, well, just bring it with you and... 247 00:11:28,211 --> 00:11:30,051 And I think this might be important. 248 00:11:30,081 --> 00:11:33,991 The model submarine and this broken plastic fork are definitely important. 249 00:11:34,021 --> 00:11:35,731 - Okay. - And this! 250 00:11:35,761 --> 00:11:37,521 The model submarine, the broken plastic fork, 251 00:11:37,545 --> 00:11:41,071 and this poster of an alien in a bikini are all important. 252 00:11:41,111 --> 00:11:44,851 - Sure, fine, now can we just... - And this! This is for sure important. 253 00:11:44,881 --> 00:11:46,181 Oh, God, no! 254 00:11:46,185 --> 00:11:48,391 - Wait, what about this? - Eh, nah, that's nothing. 255 00:11:48,421 --> 00:11:50,391 But it was hidden in that statue! 256 00:11:50,421 --> 00:11:52,901 Okay, fine. But you're carrying it. 257 00:11:52,931 --> 00:11:54,301 That's the big question? 258 00:11:54,331 --> 00:11:56,741 Well, here at IIA, 259 00:11:56,771 --> 00:12:00,276 the answer is flipping the paradigm so we achieve 260 00:12:00,277 --> 00:12:03,781 our measurables with maximum ROI cost-benefit. 261 00:12:03,821 --> 00:12:05,751 Oh, hey, I just got corporate buzzword bingo. 262 00:12:05,791 --> 00:12:08,331 Well, mock all you want, but Fabian knows what he's doing. 263 00:12:08,361 --> 00:12:09,521 Oh, yeah, and what is that? 264 00:12:09,545 --> 00:12:11,831 Securing a monopoly over the entire spy industry 265 00:12:11,871 --> 00:12:13,911 so he can corner the market and gain undue influence 266 00:12:13,935 --> 00:12:17,141 - over national and global politics? - He also makes a mean quiche. 267 00:12:17,181 --> 00:12:20,751 It's all just so structured. Oh! An org chart? 268 00:12:20,781 --> 00:12:23,221 - Hey! Snap out of it. - Right. Bad guys. 269 00:12:23,261 --> 00:12:25,901 Organized, sensible, 401k-providing bad guys. 270 00:12:25,931 --> 00:12:27,931 Listen, this orientation is our chance, okay? 271 00:12:27,971 --> 00:12:30,601 We have to get further into the building without drawing attention. 272 00:12:30,631 --> 00:12:32,841 Good luck. Security might be breezy out here, 273 00:12:32,881 --> 00:12:36,051 but nobody gets into zone 2 without a lapel chip. 274 00:12:36,081 --> 00:12:38,091 It also controls when we can use the bathroom, 275 00:12:38,121 --> 00:12:40,931 which seems, you know, like a crime, almost. 276 00:12:40,961 --> 00:12:43,331 Hey! They make us pay for these! 277 00:12:46,901 --> 00:12:50,181 Good God, this guy is lame. This is supposed to be our competition? 278 00:12:50,211 --> 00:12:52,451 Mm, technically, no. He's crushing us. 279 00:12:52,481 --> 00:12:54,451 You're so lucky this ripped on a seam. 280 00:12:54,491 --> 00:12:56,461 You could've asked me for help, you know. 281 00:12:56,491 --> 00:12:59,361 Could I? Or are you too busy working for the competition? 282 00:12:59,391 --> 00:13:02,101 - Again, not our competition. - He's got a point, Ray. 283 00:13:02,131 --> 00:13:04,841 Of course I'm gonna help you! I mean, don't get me wrong, 284 00:13:04,842 --> 00:13:07,171 the money's great here, but y'all are family. 285 00:13:07,181 --> 00:13:08,821 I'm gonna try pinging the homing beacon. 286 00:13:08,851 --> 00:13:10,571 That must be the underground warehouse. 287 00:13:10,595 --> 00:13:12,521 - Great. Can you take us there? - Sure thing. 288 00:13:12,561 --> 00:13:14,991 Oh, I just earned my bathroom break for the day. 289 00:13:15,031 --> 00:13:16,231 Who needs a pit stop? 290 00:13:16,261 --> 00:13:17,341 - I could tinkle. - No time. 291 00:13:17,371 --> 00:13:19,291 Just pee in your pants. It's what we trained for. 292 00:13:19,311 --> 00:13:20,871 Sterling, dear, it's me. 293 00:13:20,901 --> 00:13:25,851 What is your status regarding Operation IIA Take Down? Over. 294 00:13:25,881 --> 00:13:26,981 Damn it! 295 00:13:27,021 --> 00:13:30,221 - Sterling? Sterling! - Moms, right? 296 00:13:35,301 --> 00:13:39,241 Aw, totally bungling a mission for avoidable reasons? 297 00:13:39,271 --> 00:13:41,081 Ah, it takes me back. 298 00:13:42,881 --> 00:13:44,181 Well, that was easy. 299 00:13:44,221 --> 00:13:46,991 Hey, what's the form you fill out for getting your ass kicked? 300 00:13:47,021 --> 00:13:49,431 Looks like 22-C, which entitles them 301 00:13:49,461 --> 00:13:53,201 to free rehabilitation and up to four weeks sick leave. 302 00:13:53,241 --> 00:13:56,011 Shit! Guys, the memory stick is on the move from the warehouse. 303 00:13:56,041 --> 00:13:57,821 Okay, let's split up. Lana and Cyril, you get 304 00:13:57,822 --> 00:13:59,601 to the warehouse and rig the device to explode. 305 00:13:59,621 --> 00:14:02,466 Ray and I will find the memory stick and we'll meet you there. 306 00:14:04,361 --> 00:14:07,941 - Oh, no, why'd it have to be Terry? - Please, we can take him. 307 00:14:07,971 --> 00:14:10,071 No, he's just the only friend I've made here. 308 00:14:10,101 --> 00:14:12,011 We ate lunch everyday at the same table. 309 00:14:12,041 --> 00:14:15,411 Attention. All agents, be on the lookout for suspicious elements. 310 00:14:15,451 --> 00:14:18,551 - Ah, buttercups. - Any weaknesses I should know about? 311 00:14:18,591 --> 00:14:21,706 - He loves pudding? - Probably won't come up, but okay. 312 00:14:22,807 --> 00:14:24,431 - Ah... - This isn't personal! 313 00:14:24,461 --> 00:14:27,871 I genuinely value you as a co-worker and a friend! 314 00:14:27,911 --> 00:14:30,956 - Who are you? - Oh, screw you, guy! 315 00:14:37,531 --> 00:14:40,161 - Guards. Be careful. - Should we tiptoe? 316 00:14:40,201 --> 00:14:44,101 - Like you're tiptoeing around Robert? - Cyril, I swear to God. 317 00:14:44,141 --> 00:14:47,211 - What will you do if he finds out? - Well, as long as no limp-dick, 318 00:14:47,241 --> 00:14:49,581 four-eyed nerds run their mouths, he won't! 319 00:14:49,621 --> 00:14:52,701 One, we both know my penis is generally firm when it needs to be. 320 00:14:52,725 --> 00:14:54,461 And two, I've been hesitant to say this, 321 00:14:54,491 --> 00:14:56,201 but you leave me no choice. 322 00:14:56,231 --> 00:14:59,131 Lana Kane, you are turning into Archer. 323 00:14:59,171 --> 00:15:00,941 And you are turning into a gigantic pain 324 00:15:00,971 --> 00:15:04,441 in my otherwise perfect ass. There's our target. 325 00:15:04,481 --> 00:15:07,221 - Okay, I'll create a distraction... - No, I've got this. 326 00:15:07,251 --> 00:15:09,191 Watch the bureaucratic master at work. 327 00:15:09,221 --> 00:15:10,491 You there! 328 00:15:10,521 --> 00:15:13,501 You can't be on guard duty, you forgot to fill out your T9-32! 329 00:15:13,531 --> 00:15:15,331 - Got it right here, pal. - Oh. 330 00:15:15,371 --> 00:15:17,471 But that truck isn't a company asset, 331 00:15:17,511 --> 00:15:21,611 - which means you also need a... - A CM-5? Not my first rodeo. 332 00:15:21,651 --> 00:15:23,951 Hey, don't you need a VS-10 to be in here? 333 00:15:23,981 --> 00:15:26,161 Crap. Good bureaucracy. 334 00:15:28,391 --> 00:15:30,101 Okay, maybe not the best distraction. 335 00:15:30,131 --> 00:15:32,471 - Ya think? - Just like your emotional affair 336 00:15:32,481 --> 00:15:34,321 isn't the best distraction from the fact that... 337 00:15:34,345 --> 00:15:37,611 Oh, my God. I'm not turning into Archer! 338 00:15:37,651 --> 00:15:39,211 Really? Let's look at the evidence. 339 00:15:39,251 --> 00:15:40,651 You hit on anything that moves, 340 00:15:40,681 --> 00:15:43,221 you party all night and sleep all day, 341 00:15:43,261 --> 00:15:44,621 and you've been taking way too many 342 00:15:44,645 --> 00:15:48,401 - gummy women's multivitamins. - Wait, that's an Archer thing? 343 00:15:57,151 --> 00:15:59,726 Damn it, those explosives were the only way to blow up the device. 344 00:15:59,751 --> 00:16:01,961 All right, so we'll rig a bomb or something. 345 00:16:01,985 --> 00:16:03,401 Improvising? Okay, "Archer." 346 00:16:03,431 --> 00:16:04,571 - What? - Enough! 347 00:16:04,601 --> 00:16:06,671 Everybody enough! If I know IIA, 348 00:16:06,701 --> 00:16:09,371 Diamond Force is probably coming for us right now! 349 00:16:09,411 --> 00:16:12,111 - Diamond Force? - The elite kill squad. 350 00:16:12,151 --> 00:16:14,651 - They all wear matching diamond rings. - Cool. 351 00:16:14,691 --> 00:16:16,521 Well, we can't leave the device and risk IIA 352 00:16:16,561 --> 00:16:20,061 using it to blow up the world, which means... 353 00:16:20,101 --> 00:16:24,101 - Yeah? - Oh, I had hoped you had something. 354 00:16:25,441 --> 00:16:28,081 This is the nicest parking lot I've ever seen. 355 00:16:28,111 --> 00:16:30,081 What do you think this space goes for right here 356 00:16:30,121 --> 00:16:32,451 between these lines? Like, 5, 6 million? 357 00:16:32,491 --> 00:16:34,221 Do you recognize anything yet, Colt? 358 00:16:34,261 --> 00:16:36,031 Hold up. I thought his name was Jeremy. 359 00:16:36,061 --> 00:16:37,571 I'm sticking with Colt, damn it! 360 00:16:37,601 --> 00:16:41,741 - There, that's it. - Oh, my God. It's gorgeous! 361 00:16:41,771 --> 00:16:43,491 Just installed a new engine last year. 362 00:16:43,511 --> 00:16:45,051 There's a kegerator in the back, 363 00:16:45,081 --> 00:16:46,681 and she gets three miles per gallon. 364 00:16:46,721 --> 00:16:50,161 But on a good downhill, I can jack that baby up to four. 365 00:16:50,191 --> 00:16:52,091 How do you remember nothing about who you are, 366 00:16:52,131 --> 00:16:56,001 - and everything about this van? - I mean, I get it. 367 00:17:03,081 --> 00:17:04,791 - Change of plans. - As usual. 368 00:17:04,821 --> 00:17:07,531 - What the...? Ray? - Pam! Guess what? 369 00:17:07,561 --> 00:17:10,061 We don't have time for this. It's Diamond Force! 370 00:17:32,381 --> 00:17:35,276 - What's the plan, Archer? - Um, swerve until they 371 00:17:35,277 --> 00:17:38,401 accidentally shoot the device and blow it up for us? 372 00:17:38,431 --> 00:17:39,731 Someone get Mother on comms! 373 00:17:39,771 --> 00:17:42,741 I need some cataract-filled eyes in the sky. 374 00:17:42,771 --> 00:17:45,511 We no longer have comms because you two destroyed them! 375 00:17:45,541 --> 00:17:47,821 Shouting at me doesn't make me regret things, Cyril! 376 00:17:47,851 --> 00:17:50,651 Yeah, sometimes you have to make a call in the moment! 377 00:17:50,691 --> 00:17:53,631 - Ho-ho, of course you'd take his side. - Who's side? Mine? 378 00:17:53,661 --> 00:17:56,101 I am not! Turning! Into Archer! 379 00:17:56,131 --> 00:17:59,341 Okay, I really feel like you guys are talking about me. 380 00:17:59,371 --> 00:18:02,281 - Damn it, could you be quiet? - Wow, passive aggressive much? 381 00:18:02,311 --> 00:18:04,521 Not the point, asshole. 382 00:18:04,551 --> 00:18:07,661 This is Ray to Old Mother Hen. Do you copy? 383 00:18:07,691 --> 00:18:09,391 - What did he say? - Mother! 384 00:18:09,421 --> 00:18:10,791 It's them! We're back online! 385 00:18:10,831 --> 00:18:12,311 I need you to find me a cliff! 386 00:18:12,335 --> 00:18:14,271 - You look! - Yeah! Teamwork! 387 00:18:14,301 --> 00:18:15,771 Okay, looking for a cliff. 388 00:18:15,801 --> 00:18:20,151 Let's see, there's a gentle slope. It's really beautiful country. 389 00:18:20,181 --> 00:18:22,521 Oh, my God, dying over here! 390 00:18:22,551 --> 00:18:24,421 There! The Marina Bay Sands! 391 00:18:24,451 --> 00:18:27,161 There's the incomplete freeway overpass nearby. 392 00:18:27,191 --> 00:18:29,501 Yes! I can't believe I'm saying this, 393 00:18:29,525 --> 00:18:30,701 but nice work, Robert. 394 00:18:34,841 --> 00:18:36,281 Okay. Everybody in the van. 395 00:18:36,311 --> 00:18:39,302 - Excuse me, his name is Jethro Kull! - Whatever! 396 00:18:40,191 --> 00:18:44,391 Smooth in-line tracking, and accurate ceiling constellations? 397 00:18:44,431 --> 00:18:48,401 - This van rocks! - Did someone say, "rock?" 398 00:18:49,611 --> 00:18:53,451 - Ragnar Rockingson! - Oh, good, another Krieger. 399 00:18:57,761 --> 00:18:59,481 Get the memory stick and Colt out of here! 400 00:18:59,505 --> 00:19:01,461 - What about you? - I'm gonna ditch the flatbed 401 00:19:01,462 --> 00:19:04,271 over the overpass and hope the fall destroys the device. 402 00:19:04,301 --> 00:19:05,861 What if you can't make it out in time? 403 00:19:05,871 --> 00:19:07,841 Just jump the gap and we'll lose them! 404 00:19:07,881 --> 00:19:11,535 - This way's more heroic! - Asshole! 405 00:19:28,481 --> 00:19:30,121 Archer! 406 00:19:33,491 --> 00:19:34,561 Ah, shit. 407 00:19:34,601 --> 00:19:36,991 - Sterling Archer. - Present. 408 00:19:37,016 --> 00:19:40,611 You may have destroyed my device and stolen my plans, 409 00:19:40,641 --> 00:19:43,911 but you left us with a very powerful bargaining chip... 410 00:19:43,951 --> 00:19:45,181 - My life? - Your life! 411 00:19:45,221 --> 00:19:47,761 Shit, sorry. I can tell you thought that would sound cool. 412 00:19:47,791 --> 00:19:48,891 Here, try it again. 413 00:19:48,921 --> 00:19:50,761 Blah blah blah, bargaining chip, and... 414 00:19:50,791 --> 00:19:53,901 - ah, shit! - Do you ever shut up? 415 00:19:53,931 --> 00:19:56,911 At movies, I guess. If they're good... ow! 416 00:19:56,941 --> 00:19:59,381 Oh, God, Mr. Archer is gonna die, 417 00:19:59,411 --> 00:20:00,811 and the agency is gonna go bankrupt, 418 00:20:00,835 --> 00:20:02,921 and I'll be stuck in Singapore living in this van! 419 00:20:02,951 --> 00:20:05,961 - Back seat folds down into a bed. - Oh, my God, it does! 420 00:20:05,991 --> 00:20:08,631 You know you're still bonkers rich in America, right? 421 00:20:08,661 --> 00:20:10,901 Oh, yeah. I feel better. Let's go home. 422 00:20:10,931 --> 00:20:13,371 Okay, what about saving Archer and the agency? 423 00:20:13,411 --> 00:20:16,751 - Eh, I've got options. - Cyril, cover me. I'm going after him. 424 00:20:16,781 --> 00:20:19,351 And how do you plan to do that? That's Diamond Force! 425 00:20:19,381 --> 00:20:22,421 - I mean, did you see those rings? - I'll figure it out on the way! 426 00:20:22,461 --> 00:20:24,261 So no plan. Just like Archer. 427 00:20:24,291 --> 00:20:26,924 Risking everything for whatever works for you. 428 00:20:28,596 --> 00:20:31,511 It's a shame it had to come to this, Sterling Archer. 429 00:20:31,541 --> 00:20:34,411 Yeah, I'm feeling that too. Might be a near death thing though. 430 00:20:34,451 --> 00:20:36,791 Near death? I don't want to kill you. 431 00:20:36,821 --> 00:20:38,661 I want you to work for me. 432 00:20:38,691 --> 00:20:41,561 It's just a shame it involved blowing up my warehouse. 433 00:20:41,601 --> 00:20:44,771 What? When we first met you said you'd never hire me. 434 00:20:44,801 --> 00:20:46,671 What can I say? You've grown on me. 435 00:20:46,711 --> 00:20:48,981 Your pure, raw instincts are something 436 00:20:49,011 --> 00:20:51,781 no organizational flowchart can replace. 437 00:20:51,821 --> 00:20:53,991 Well, right now, my pure, raw instincts are saying, 438 00:20:54,021 --> 00:20:56,971 "Screw you, Fabian! I'll never help you with your classic 439 00:20:56,995 --> 00:20:58,301 "evil villain destroys the world 440 00:20:58,331 --> 00:21:00,701 with some sort of weird doomsday device plot!" 441 00:21:02,601 --> 00:21:04,471 - What? - You heard me. Never! 442 00:21:04,511 --> 00:21:07,896 Wait, do you think I'm, like, some kind of, super villain? 443 00:21:10,721 --> 00:21:15,165 Oh, my God, that's so... oh, that's so funny. 444 00:21:15,190 --> 00:21:17,841 Okay, I can totally see how it could have come off that way. 445 00:21:17,871 --> 00:21:20,711 Wait, so you're not trying to destroy the world? 446 00:21:20,741 --> 00:21:24,721 No! Archer, I want to use the device 447 00:21:24,751 --> 00:21:26,721 for its intended purpose... 448 00:21:26,751 --> 00:21:30,831 eliminating our global dependency on fossil fuels. 449 00:21:30,861 --> 00:21:33,871 Really? Wow. I mean, talk about crossed wires. 450 00:21:33,901 --> 00:21:36,471 But first, I'm going to make fossil fuel companies 451 00:21:36,511 --> 00:21:39,341 pay me a huge ransom not to use the device, 452 00:21:39,381 --> 00:21:41,351 whilst also running a protection racket 453 00:21:41,381 --> 00:21:44,821 over every major country to ensure I don't blow them up. 454 00:21:44,861 --> 00:21:48,331 Okay, wires uncrossed. You're evil. I'm back out. 455 00:21:48,361 --> 00:21:50,871 Shame, I'm going to make trillions. 456 00:21:50,901 --> 00:21:52,771 And you could have been part of it. 457 00:21:52,811 --> 00:21:54,528 But alas. 458 00:21:57,262 --> 00:21:59,751 Holy shit! Oh, my God. 459 00:21:59,791 --> 00:22:01,521 Oh, you guys are in so much trouble. 460 00:22:01,561 --> 00:22:04,031 Let me introduce you to Barry the death cyborg, 461 00:22:04,061 --> 00:22:06,405 who actually is my friend now, right, Barry? 462 00:22:06,430 --> 00:22:09,335 Sorry, pal. It's actually Other Barry. 463 00:22:10,395 --> 00:22:15,571 sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ Addic7ed.com ~