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CREDITS

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Loki, once again, for
crimes against Asgard,

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you are banished to Earth.

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Ah. Where to? New York? London? Paris?

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Springfield.

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No!

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Ow!

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Whoa. Hey, man. Can I help you?

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What would you know
of a distant, abusive father?

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And a blonde-haired sibling
who's always perfect?

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Oh, have I got the family for you.

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So, the boy says you're magic.

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Can you turn one pork chop into two?

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I worship you, great Loki.

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Command me, O Lord.
I renounce all other gods.

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The last thing this world needs
is more pork chops.

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Get her!

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No, Bart! I'm your sis--

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"Whosoever holds this hammer,

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if they be worthy,

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shall possess the power of Thor".

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Well, there's no way I'm worthy.
I'll just put it back.

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Whoa!

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Goodbye, self-esteem issues!

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Ha!

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Lisa is Thor?

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It's not all it's cracked up to be.

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And I brought the Springfield Avengers
with me.

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_

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I ruined my pants in a brand-new way.

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All right, they're no help.

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But you're through here, Loki!

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No, no! You're making
a big mistake. Homer, help me!

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No! Homer, I'm really--

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Ay, caramba!

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-Whoa!
-We love you so much, boy.

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Yes, Father.

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Oh, and tomorrow could you turn Flanders
into a pork chop? I'll do the rest.

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Yes, Father.

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Finally, a functional family.

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Gee, Moe, I can't believe
you gave us drinks on the house tonight.

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That's because I ain't Moe.

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I'm Loki.

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And these beers will ruin your lives,

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dissolve your livers,
fill you with remorse.

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And though they say
these bottles are recyclable,

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they just fill up the ocean!

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Your planet is dying!

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Still worth it.

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You're not nice!

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Privacy please.

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Shh!

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Loki, I could give my verdict
in two words or less,

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but as you would put it,

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you stand here accused
of tampering with the sacred timeline,

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philosophically opposing predeterminism,

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crossing over into forbidden areas
of Disney+,

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taking two spots in the Goofy parking lot,

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being more popular than all the heroes,

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having a British accent when you're
actually supposed to be from Norway,

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promising to be good, then breaking
your promise like a zillion times,

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making us sit through
numerous mid-credits scenes,

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hoping they advance the story!

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And will you please wash your nasty hair?

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Guilty as charged!

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Get out of my face.

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CREDITS