1
00:00:02,990 --> 00:00:04,885
They're not gonna laugh at you.

2
00:00:04,890 --> 00:00:06,655
This time. Come on.

3
00:00:08,090 --> 00:00:10,385
Hey, Spence, are we supposed
to be doing something

4
00:00:10,390 --> 00:00:12,525
while you talk to that corner?

5
00:00:12,530 --> 00:00:14,795
Sorry, I just gotta get
this speech right.

6
00:00:14,800 --> 00:00:17,265
You guys are my last rehearsal
before my dress rehearsal

7
00:00:17,270 --> 00:00:19,965
before my final dress rehearsal
before my opening.

8
00:00:19,970 --> 00:00:21,965
But yeah, help yourself
to the sumptuous feast

9
00:00:21,970 --> 00:00:23,805
I painstakingly prepared.

10
00:00:23,810 --> 00:00:26,305
You put out old takeout boxes
from last week.

11
00:00:26,310 --> 00:00:28,145
And you didn't even put out silverware.

12
00:00:28,150 --> 00:00:30,345
Okay, before I reveal the centerpiece

13
00:00:30,350 --> 00:00:32,015
of my upcoming exhibition,

14
00:00:32,020 --> 00:00:33,315
I'd like to recite a short poem.

15
00:00:33,320 --> 00:00:35,215
What is this, a TED Talk?

16
00:00:35,220 --> 00:00:36,885
I'm just joking. I know it's not.

17
00:00:36,890 --> 00:00:39,160
Ted was a friend of the family.

18
00:00:40,690 --> 00:00:44,025
What is a feeling? How does
one define a rainbow?

19
00:00:44,030 --> 00:00:47,295
If a bamboo breaks...

20
00:00:47,300 --> 00:00:49,325
Oh, sorry, Spencer. Hold on.

21
00:00:49,330 --> 00:00:52,265
I love this squirrel
getting a manicure meme.

22
00:00:52,270 --> 00:00:55,135
It says so much without saying anything.

23
00:00:55,140 --> 00:00:58,005
Mm. I'm saying something.

24
00:00:58,010 --> 00:00:59,434
I used to find that funny,

25
00:00:59,439 --> 00:01:01,275
but now I follow a number
of squirrel accounts

26
00:01:01,280 --> 00:01:03,980
that found the nail polish
color highly problematic.

27
00:01:05,650 --> 00:01:08,115
Okay, let's give Spencer
the attention he deserves.

28
00:01:08,120 --> 00:01:09,145
Thank you.

29
00:01:09,150 --> 00:01:10,286
Harper, would you do me the honor

30
00:01:10,290 --> 00:01:11,555
of capturing the unveiling

31
00:01:11,560 --> 00:01:13,015
to show my future children,

32
00:01:13,020 --> 00:01:15,085
Banksy and Basquiat?

33
00:01:15,090 --> 00:01:16,525
I'm assuming they'll be artists,

34
00:01:16,530 --> 00:01:19,325
but if not, they'll be
very cool accountants.

35
00:01:19,330 --> 00:01:22,865
May I present... "Soliloquies In Time".

36
00:01:22,870 --> 00:01:25,335
Ugh.

37
00:01:27,540 --> 00:01:29,335
This needs to be in the Guggenheim.

38
00:01:29,340 --> 00:01:30,935
But not in the bathroom this time!

39
00:01:30,940 --> 00:01:32,275
Fool me once.

40
00:01:32,280 --> 00:01:33,875
No, not your sculpture.

41
00:01:33,880 --> 00:01:35,305
This pic I just took of Carly

42
00:01:35,310 --> 00:01:37,605
spitting out your nasty
leftover meatballs.

43
00:01:37,610 --> 00:01:39,415
You have to post this.

44
00:01:39,420 --> 00:01:40,815
I'm PearDropping it now.

45
00:01:42,490 --> 00:01:43,985
Oh, my God.

46
00:01:43,990 --> 00:01:45,585
How should I caption it?

47
00:01:45,590 --> 00:01:48,355
"When your leftovers
should have just been left".

48
00:01:48,360 --> 00:01:49,655
You guys get it?

49
00:01:49,660 --> 00:01:52,255
'Cause, like, left and left.

50
00:01:52,260 --> 00:01:53,860
At least you're pretty.

51
00:02:26,160 --> 00:02:27,626
Did you know that Manicure Squirrel

52
00:02:27,630 --> 00:02:29,765
does nail art tutorials now?

53
00:02:29,770 --> 00:02:31,295
I know I'm supposed to be editing,

54
00:02:31,300 --> 00:02:33,035
but want to watch
every single one of them?

55
00:02:33,040 --> 00:02:34,495
That squirrel's an anti-vaxxer.

56
00:02:34,500 --> 00:02:36,635
Damn it.

57
00:02:36,640 --> 00:02:38,835
Carly, you're number one!

58
00:02:38,840 --> 00:02:41,875
- And Harper, you're great too!
- Yes.

59
00:02:41,880 --> 00:02:45,215
But the photo that you posted,
you're number one on IMemeDb!

60
00:02:45,220 --> 00:02:46,515
Screw you,

61
00:02:46,520 --> 00:02:48,145
baby confused by Pop Rocks!

62
00:02:49,250 --> 00:02:51,320
- Ooh, that baby gonna be mad!
- Ay!

63
00:02:52,790 --> 00:02:54,920
Interesting.

64
00:02:55,990 --> 00:02:58,025
Carly, you need to capitalize
on this moment.

65
00:02:58,030 --> 00:03:00,255
Re-share some of the funniest
meatball face memes.

66
00:03:00,260 --> 00:03:02,525
You'll drive a ton of traffic
to your channel.

67
00:03:02,530 --> 00:03:04,965
But do I want to use this
to drive traffic?

68
00:03:04,970 --> 00:03:06,035
It's not my favorite look.

69
00:03:06,040 --> 00:03:07,435
Doesn't matter!

70
00:03:07,440 --> 00:03:09,635
All publicity is good publicity.

71
00:03:09,640 --> 00:03:11,875
'Cause when people like
your face, they'll be all like,

72
00:03:11,880 --> 00:03:13,935
"How can I see more of that face?"

73
00:03:13,940 --> 00:03:16,475
And that's where the merch comes in.

74
00:03:16,480 --> 00:03:19,745
Wait, merch? I don't know.

75
00:03:19,750 --> 00:03:22,615
I just relaunched,
and it still feels new.

76
00:03:22,620 --> 00:03:25,015
Like a fawn trying its little legs out.

77
00:03:25,020 --> 00:03:27,715
Maybe I should just wait a beat
and see how things shake out.

78
00:03:27,720 --> 00:03:31,155
You don't have a beat, Bambi.
You're hot now.

79
00:03:31,160 --> 00:03:34,800
Tomorrow, someone's gonna eat
a moldy cannoli and go like...

80
00:03:35,500 --> 00:03:38,795
And then you'll be
the next baby with Pop Rocks.

81
00:03:38,800 --> 00:03:39,935
Harper's right.

82
00:03:39,940 --> 00:03:42,335
Strike while the meatball is rancid.

83
00:03:42,340 --> 00:03:44,605
Okay. Yeah.

84
00:03:44,610 --> 00:03:46,505
This is a good opportunity.

85
00:03:46,510 --> 00:03:48,345
Harper, can we do keychains?

86
00:03:48,350 --> 00:03:49,775
We can try.

87
00:03:49,780 --> 00:03:51,980
My keychain guy hasn't been
getting back to me.

88
00:03:53,450 --> 00:03:54,815
Grandma B. says

89
00:03:54,820 --> 00:03:57,615
your oatmeal got cold,
and somehow it's my fault.

90
00:03:57,620 --> 00:04:00,085
Oh, she's not blaming me.

91
00:04:00,090 --> 00:04:02,785
Millicent, Carly's number one
on IMemeDb.

92
00:04:02,790 --> 00:04:05,225
Too bad Carly's reign
will be short-lived.

93
00:04:05,230 --> 00:04:09,095
And then she'll come to regret
ever having had a face at all.

94
00:04:09,100 --> 00:04:10,150
What is there to regret?

95
00:04:10,155 --> 00:04:12,750
It's a photo of Carly
spitting out a meatball.

96
00:04:12,755 --> 00:04:14,020
Precisely!

97
00:04:14,025 --> 00:04:16,260
In a few years, we could all be vegans.

98
00:04:16,265 --> 00:04:17,690
Or not be allowed to spit

99
00:04:17,695 --> 00:04:19,490
because of a worldwide pandemic.

100
00:04:21,035 --> 00:04:24,460
Don't worry about things
that will never happen.

101
00:04:24,465 --> 00:04:27,900
Ooh, 26 pizzerias just followed me.

102
00:04:27,905 --> 00:04:30,140
- Hello, free garlic knots.
- Oh!

103
00:04:30,145 --> 00:04:32,340
How can you not see that this meatball

104
00:04:32,345 --> 00:04:34,615
is a ticking time bomb?

105
00:04:34,620 --> 00:04:37,285
I'm gonna check your timeline
for more offensive content.

106
00:04:37,290 --> 00:04:40,495
Aww, that's cute.
You're protecting Carly.

107
00:04:40,500 --> 00:04:43,770
No! I want to cancel Carly.

108
00:04:44,670 --> 00:04:46,665
Right, yeah, that makes more sense.

109
00:04:46,670 --> 00:04:47,765
- Freddie?
- Yeah?

110
00:04:47,770 --> 00:04:49,335
You wanna dad it up?

111
00:04:49,340 --> 00:04:50,865
Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure.

112
00:04:50,870 --> 00:04:53,635
Uh, there's nothing I can do
to stop you, right?

113
00:04:53,640 --> 00:04:55,610
- Nothing.
- All righty, have fun.

114
00:04:58,120 --> 00:05:00,120
Interesting.

115
00:05:07,490 --> 00:05:10,825
The memes you're sharing
have ruined my life!

116
00:05:10,830 --> 00:05:12,425
Did they take your millions of dollars

117
00:05:12,430 --> 00:05:14,795
and the food from your fridge
and the clothes off your back?

118
00:05:14,800 --> 00:05:17,095
Worse. They've taken my dignity.

119
00:05:17,100 --> 00:05:18,235
Listen.

120
00:05:18,240 --> 00:05:20,370
"When your man calls me".

121
00:05:21,640 --> 00:05:24,270
"When he says he has five roommates".

122
00:05:25,340 --> 00:05:28,905
"when you realize cartoon
characters can be hot".

123
00:05:28,910 --> 00:05:32,415
Ooh, that's so true though.

124
00:05:32,420 --> 00:05:33,845
You guys, it's not funny.

125
00:05:33,850 --> 00:05:36,345
People think you're making
that face about my art.

126
00:05:36,350 --> 00:05:37,815
What? No.

127
00:05:37,820 --> 00:05:39,355
You can see the disgusting meatball

128
00:05:39,360 --> 00:05:40,715
right there in my hand.

129
00:05:40,720 --> 00:05:42,755
If anything, I'm highlighting your art.

130
00:05:42,760 --> 00:05:45,225
Look at this article on QuackFeed.

131
00:05:45,230 --> 00:05:47,195
Okay, "Don't hate me,

132
00:05:47,200 --> 00:05:50,395
but the artwork in the back
of the Meatball Face meme

133
00:05:50,400 --> 00:05:52,570
is actually kinda good".

134
00:05:53,940 --> 00:05:55,765
That's the best you could find?

135
00:05:55,770 --> 00:05:57,365
Kinda good?

136
00:05:57,370 --> 00:05:59,080
With a question mark?

137
00:06:00,410 --> 00:06:02,046
Carly, my opening is this weekend,

138
00:06:02,051 --> 00:06:03,277
and all people are talking about

139
00:06:03,281 --> 00:06:05,716
are my leftovers and your face.

140
00:06:05,721 --> 00:06:07,616
Okay, yeah. I hear you.

141
00:06:07,621 --> 00:06:09,485
But I just restarted "iCarly"

142
00:06:09,490 --> 00:06:12,115
and these memes are
really helping my channel.

143
00:06:12,120 --> 00:06:13,285
What do you want me to do?

144
00:06:13,290 --> 00:06:15,155
The least you could do is apologize.

145
00:06:15,160 --> 00:06:16,885
But I didn't do anything wrong.

146
00:06:16,890 --> 00:06:18,730
Didn't you?

147
00:06:20,760 --> 00:06:23,695
Fine.

148
00:06:23,700 --> 00:06:25,840
I'm sorry if your feelings are hurt.

149
00:06:26,800 --> 00:06:28,910
I didn't realize you were so sensitive.

150
00:06:32,740 --> 00:06:35,475
What kind of fauxpology was that?

151
00:06:35,480 --> 00:06:37,775
Fauxpology? Love!

152
00:06:37,780 --> 00:06:39,745
That is a perfect caption
for Meatball Face.

153
00:06:39,750 --> 00:06:43,315
Totally! "When you hear a fauxpology".

154
00:06:43,320 --> 00:06:44,945
Wait, how do you spell that?

155
00:06:44,950 --> 00:06:47,915
Oh, you spell it R-U-kidding me?

156
00:06:50,790 --> 00:06:53,455
Spencer, you know
how cutthroat it is out here.

157
00:06:53,460 --> 00:06:54,795
All these new platforms

158
00:06:54,800 --> 00:06:57,225
and influencers getting
younger and younger.

159
00:06:57,230 --> 00:06:59,035
It's like Harper always says.

160
00:06:59,040 --> 00:07:01,040
"You gotta switch it up on a bitch!"

161
00:07:02,370 --> 00:07:04,135
I'll never say that again.

162
00:07:04,140 --> 00:07:06,805
It was cute though. You tried.

163
00:07:06,810 --> 00:07:09,805
Tomorrow, I could be beaten
by a moldy cannoli.

164
00:07:09,810 --> 00:07:12,645
Pop Rocks baby is already in rehab.

165
00:07:12,650 --> 00:07:14,175
All right. I get it.

166
00:07:14,180 --> 00:07:16,085
Just don't add any
more fuel to the fire.

167
00:07:16,090 --> 00:07:17,285
Ba-bam!

168
00:07:17,290 --> 00:07:19,815
Who wants a Carly meatball face T-shirt?

169
00:07:19,820 --> 00:07:22,425
- Oh, my God, these are adorable.
- I know!

170
00:07:22,430 --> 00:07:24,125
Is it gauche to wear your own face?

171
00:07:24,130 --> 00:07:25,595
No, your face is...

172
00:07:25,600 --> 00:07:27,595
Seriously?

173
00:07:27,600 --> 00:07:29,595
Spencer, it's like I told Carly.

174
00:07:29,600 --> 00:07:31,865
There's no such thing as bad publicity!

175
00:07:31,870 --> 00:07:33,835
This meme is good for all of us.

176
00:07:33,840 --> 00:07:35,435
You're getting your name out there.

177
00:07:35,440 --> 00:07:36,765
I learned that my keychain guy

178
00:07:36,770 --> 00:07:38,680
isn't ghosting me, he's just dead.

179
00:07:40,980 --> 00:07:44,445
Plus, feel the material.

180
00:07:44,450 --> 00:07:47,245
Oh wow, that is soft.

181
00:07:47,250 --> 00:07:48,545
Fine.

182
00:07:48,550 --> 00:07:51,285
I'll wear it to bed, and only that.

183
00:07:56,660 --> 00:07:59,055
Millicent, you can come back now.

184
00:07:59,060 --> 00:08:01,895
My mom is no longer
using up all our bandwidth

185
00:08:01,900 --> 00:08:04,825
video-chatting with her
Christian Book Club.

186
00:08:04,830 --> 00:08:06,365
Good, because I was just finishing

187
00:08:06,370 --> 00:08:10,035
my timeline audit, on you.

188
00:08:10,040 --> 00:08:11,075
What?

189
00:08:11,080 --> 00:08:12,736
I thought you were
doing an audit on Carly.

190
00:08:12,740 --> 00:08:14,775
I was, but all I found were posts

191
00:08:14,780 --> 00:08:17,205
supporting puppy and
cat adoption centers.

192
00:08:17,210 --> 00:08:19,645
She's a saint.

193
00:08:19,650 --> 00:08:23,185
You, on the other hand. Cyberbullying.

194
00:08:23,190 --> 00:08:25,515
Cyberbullying? Against who?

195
00:08:25,520 --> 00:08:27,185
Against me.

196
00:08:27,190 --> 00:08:30,785
Eight years ago at 3:47 p.m.,
you wrote, and I quote,

197
00:08:30,790 --> 00:08:33,595
"I never, ever, ever, ever,
ever want kids.

198
00:08:33,600 --> 00:08:35,025
Ever!"

199
00:08:35,030 --> 00:08:36,795
I was joking!

200
00:08:36,800 --> 00:08:37,995
Then you said,

201
00:08:38,000 --> 00:08:40,870
"If you think I'm joking, I am not!"

202
00:08:42,540 --> 00:08:43,665
Okay, wow.

203
00:08:43,670 --> 00:08:47,175
I know that sounds bad,
but this was from so long ago,

204
00:08:47,180 --> 00:08:50,105
I was probably wearing Crocs
when I wrote it.

205
00:08:50,110 --> 00:08:52,875
Why? Did you use to be a nurse?

206
00:08:52,880 --> 00:08:54,315
No, I just like a shoe

207
00:08:54,320 --> 00:08:56,990
that's easy to clean and
comes in fun, bold colors.

208
00:08:57,920 --> 00:08:59,715
Millicent, I'm sorry.

209
00:08:59,720 --> 00:09:01,185
Tell me how I can make this right.

210
00:09:01,190 --> 00:09:04,855
A six-pack of Red Lamb energy drink.

211
00:09:04,860 --> 00:09:07,825
Red Lamb? That's just
caffeine and sugar.

212
00:09:07,830 --> 00:09:11,440
And red food dye number five.
That's what makes it delicious.

213
00:09:13,070 --> 00:09:16,265
You can't drink that.
It's not good for kids.

214
00:09:16,270 --> 00:09:19,935
Emotional trauma isn't good
for kids either, and yet...

215
00:09:19,940 --> 00:09:21,845
Regular or Banana Blast?

216
00:09:27,580 --> 00:09:28,685
Oh, my God!

217
00:09:28,690 --> 00:09:30,945
Spencer Shay. I'm such a fan.

218
00:09:30,950 --> 00:09:32,485
Oh, that's so sweet!

219
00:09:32,490 --> 00:09:34,315
It's nice to be recognized
for one's work.

220
00:09:34,320 --> 00:09:37,925
- You're meatball brother.
- Uh-huh. Also that.

221
00:09:37,930 --> 00:09:38,955
I'm Willow.

222
00:09:38,960 --> 00:09:41,165
I run a super popular food art Insta

223
00:09:41,170 --> 00:09:42,825
called "You Aren't What You Eat.

224
00:09:42,830 --> 00:09:45,065
Just Kidding, You Are".

225
00:09:45,070 --> 00:09:46,365
Wow, food art?

226
00:09:46,370 --> 00:09:49,265
So, like, thought-provoking
sculptures using food or...

227
00:09:49,270 --> 00:09:51,635
No, I take pictures
of what I eat for lunch.

228
00:09:51,640 --> 00:09:53,705
I've had six shows at this gallery.

229
00:09:53,710 --> 00:09:56,845
Oh, I've got a show here too.
Just the one.

230
00:09:56,850 --> 00:09:59,315
Oh, you're an artist too?

231
00:09:59,320 --> 00:10:01,385
Cute.

232
00:10:01,390 --> 00:10:03,045
Wait. Let me just...

233
00:10:03,050 --> 00:10:05,755
- Oh.
- Say, "meatball!"

234
00:10:05,760 --> 00:10:07,555
Ahh, no!

235
00:10:07,560 --> 00:10:09,625
Ahh!

236
00:10:09,630 --> 00:10:11,595
I am not gonna cry.

237
00:10:11,600 --> 00:10:14,055
You know what? I'm gonna cry.

238
00:10:14,060 --> 00:10:15,465
Sorry.

239
00:10:15,470 --> 00:10:19,095
Oh, are you? Are you sorry?

240
00:10:19,100 --> 00:10:20,565
Well, I'm sorry!

241
00:10:20,570 --> 00:10:23,665
Sorry I live in a culture that's
so obsessed with memes

242
00:10:23,670 --> 00:10:27,275
and likes and fake art
and fake apologies and...

243
00:10:27,280 --> 00:10:28,575
oh.

244
00:10:28,580 --> 00:10:30,845
I've got an idea.

245
00:10:30,850 --> 00:10:34,980
I am reborn!

246
00:10:36,790 --> 00:10:39,060
Yeah. I have that effect on people.

247
00:10:44,175 --> 00:10:46,170
Millicent, check it out.

248
00:10:46,175 --> 00:10:48,510
Carly meatball face T-shirts.

249
00:10:48,515 --> 00:10:51,740
They're $40. But for you, $39.99.

250
00:10:51,745 --> 00:10:55,415
I'd rather wear a shirt
made out of human hair.

251
00:10:56,015 --> 00:10:58,650
Besides, I don't need
your flimsy discount.

252
00:10:58,655 --> 00:11:02,050
I'm about to be Beyoncé rich
with my new business.

253
00:11:02,055 --> 00:11:04,590
What did I tell you about
taking Bey's name in vain?

254
00:11:04,595 --> 00:11:06,790
Oh, it's not in vain.

255
00:11:06,795 --> 00:11:08,290
Since finding Freddie's old posts

256
00:11:08,295 --> 00:11:10,030
turned out to be profitable,

257
00:11:10,035 --> 00:11:12,900
I realized that there's a hole
in the market.

258
00:11:12,905 --> 00:11:16,130
Any Gen Z kid can tell you
what's offensive now,

259
00:11:16,135 --> 00:11:19,170
but only Millicent can predict
what will offend next.

260
00:11:19,175 --> 00:11:22,615
I am the Offensive Oracle.

261
00:11:24,885 --> 00:11:28,610
- Oh, this card stock is legit.
- Mm-hmm.

262
00:11:28,615 --> 00:11:30,180
Want me to scrub your social media

263
00:11:30,185 --> 00:11:32,920
for a friends and family rate of $500?

264
00:11:32,925 --> 00:11:35,190
I'd rather wear a shirt made
out of human hair.

265
00:11:35,195 --> 00:11:37,390
And you can make one with all you shed.

266
00:11:40,095 --> 00:11:42,760
I even wrote a jingle
for my Super Bowl commercial.

267
00:11:42,765 --> 00:11:45,300
? Remember that we all post ?

268
00:11:45,305 --> 00:11:47,800
? From our own place of privilege ?

269
00:11:47,805 --> 00:11:49,870
? Just take into account ?

270
00:11:49,875 --> 00:11:52,640
? We all have disparate opinions ?

271
00:11:52,645 --> 00:11:57,380
? So if you're feeling worried
you might be problematic ?

272
00:11:57,385 --> 00:12:00,050
? Just call up your friend Millicent ?

273
00:12:00,055 --> 00:12:01,810
? Or go read a book ?

274
00:12:01,815 --> 00:12:04,080
? It's not my job to educate you ?

275
00:12:04,085 --> 00:12:08,595
? Unless you pay me money ?

276
00:12:10,825 --> 00:12:12,660
No one's gonna remember that song.

277
00:12:12,665 --> 00:12:16,160
But the world will remember
what you did to Spencer.

278
00:12:16,165 --> 00:12:18,830
Unless you purchase
my "Meme Sweep" package.

279
00:12:18,835 --> 00:12:21,130
It's where I get Republican
Senators over 70

280
00:12:21,135 --> 00:12:23,900
to use your meme
so no one else wants to.

281
00:12:23,905 --> 00:12:25,000
Now, hold on.

282
00:12:25,005 --> 00:12:27,410
We are not sweeping any memes

283
00:12:27,415 --> 00:12:29,610
until these tees are sold out.

284
00:12:29,615 --> 00:12:32,785
Which reminds me, I need to do
some Instagram Live promo.

285
00:12:33,615 --> 00:12:37,115
What's popping,
fashionistas, fashionistos,

286
00:12:37,120 --> 00:12:39,050
and fashionistxs?

287
00:12:39,055 --> 00:12:43,020
I just got a new shipment
of meatball tees

288
00:12:43,025 --> 00:12:46,090
in every size, color, under the rainbow.

289
00:12:46,095 --> 00:12:48,330
Oh, hey, Ray-Ray!

290
00:12:48,335 --> 00:12:50,330
That's actually a great idea!

291
00:12:50,335 --> 00:12:53,200
I can do a livestream of Spencer's show.

292
00:12:53,205 --> 00:12:54,870
That way, people's focus will be off

293
00:12:54,875 --> 00:12:57,170
my admittedly hilarious meme face

294
00:12:57,175 --> 00:12:58,640
and right back on Spencer's art,

295
00:12:58,645 --> 00:13:00,170
where it belongs.

296
00:13:00,175 --> 00:13:02,015
I wish I was my sister.

297
00:13:04,515 --> 00:13:06,550
Hi, Millicent.

298
00:13:06,555 --> 00:13:08,610
I know you're still upset with me,

299
00:13:08,615 --> 00:13:11,185
but I think this will do the trick.

300
00:13:12,685 --> 00:13:15,350
It's a USA Bae Doll!

301
00:13:15,355 --> 00:13:17,520
I even found one with your name!

302
00:13:17,525 --> 00:13:20,335
She's from the... British colonial era.

303
00:13:21,735 --> 00:13:23,760
Nothing problematic about that.

304
00:13:23,765 --> 00:13:25,200
Ooh, thanks!

305
00:13:25,205 --> 00:13:27,930
This totally erases the trauma
you inflicted on me.

306
00:13:27,935 --> 00:13:29,600
With more trauma.

307
00:13:29,605 --> 00:13:32,240
Millicent, it's just an old post.

308
00:13:32,245 --> 00:13:34,240
Oh, my gosh, you didn't even get me

309
00:13:34,245 --> 00:13:35,870
the scarlet fever add-on pack!

310
00:13:35,875 --> 00:13:39,510
Well, I...

311
00:13:39,515 --> 00:13:41,010
Wow.

312
00:13:41,015 --> 00:13:42,685
I always wanted one of these as a kid.

313
00:13:43,925 --> 00:13:46,990
And now that I'm holding it...

314
00:13:46,995 --> 00:13:48,525
I finally have one.

315
00:13:54,565 --> 00:13:56,930
Yes, you look good, girl!
Tell your friends.

316
00:13:56,935 --> 00:13:58,700
All of 'em.

317
00:13:58,705 --> 00:14:00,600
Harper, what are you doing here?

318
00:14:00,605 --> 00:14:03,170
Oh, Spencer asked me to come.
At first I was like, "Why?"

319
00:14:03,175 --> 00:14:05,640
But then immediately,
I was like, "I don't care".

320
00:14:05,645 --> 00:14:08,540
Maybe we can finally put this
whole meme thing behind us.

321
00:14:08,545 --> 00:14:10,980
Uh-huh. Maybe.

322
00:14:10,985 --> 00:14:12,310
Hi, friends!

323
00:14:12,315 --> 00:14:14,510
I'm coming to you live
from the grand opening

324
00:14:14,515 --> 00:14:17,080
of my brother Spencer's newest art show!

325
00:14:17,085 --> 00:14:20,320
And these shirts are made
with 100% recyclable materials,

326
00:14:20,325 --> 00:14:22,755
so be bad, buy that premium gas.

327
00:14:23,965 --> 00:14:25,820
Before I go in, I just want to say,

328
00:14:25,825 --> 00:14:29,300
most of the meatball face memes
you've been making are amazing.

329
00:14:29,305 --> 00:14:31,700
Some of them, a little offensive.

330
00:14:31,705 --> 00:14:33,370
Three of you need therapy.

331
00:14:33,375 --> 00:14:36,030
But Spencer isn't just the meme guy.

332
00:14:36,035 --> 00:14:37,870
He's a really talented artist.

333
00:14:37,875 --> 00:14:39,770
And this night is all about Spencer

334
00:14:39,775 --> 00:14:42,470
and has nothing to do with me or...

335
00:14:42,475 --> 00:14:45,055
my face!

336
00:14:48,185 --> 00:14:51,320
Okay, well, he's on board with the meme.

337
00:14:52,325 --> 00:14:54,625
In a really big way.

338
00:14:56,095 --> 00:14:59,295
"The Museum of Influence".

339
00:15:00,235 --> 00:15:04,400
So this is different than I expected.

340
00:15:04,405 --> 00:15:08,570
Oh, look, a slideshow.

341
00:15:08,575 --> 00:15:10,670
@JacquenessMonster.

342
00:15:10,675 --> 00:15:13,310
"I'd rather be constipated for a month

343
00:15:13,315 --> 00:15:15,240
than read your blog".

344
00:15:15,245 --> 00:15:19,050
Love that he's amplifying that.

345
00:15:19,055 --> 00:15:21,950
What do we have here?

346
00:15:21,955 --> 00:15:23,450
Like, like, like!

347
00:15:23,455 --> 00:15:26,350
Does this make your empty soul
feel better?

348
00:15:26,355 --> 00:15:28,860
A hateful like button.

349
00:15:28,865 --> 00:15:31,360
Deep?

350
00:15:31,365 --> 00:15:34,830
Oh, look, lattes. This is cute.

351
00:15:34,835 --> 00:15:37,000
And the foam says...

352
00:15:37,005 --> 00:15:40,270
"Is this art?"

353
00:15:40,275 --> 00:15:42,575
I bet the answer is yes!

354
00:15:43,575 --> 00:15:45,970
We got a lot of comments coming in.

355
00:15:45,975 --> 00:15:48,440
Most of you don't seem to be loving it,

356
00:15:48,445 --> 00:15:51,580
but why don't we talk
to some true art aficionados

357
00:15:51,585 --> 00:15:53,980
and get a more nuanced take.

358
00:15:53,985 --> 00:15:56,620
Hey, I'm Carly Shay of "iCarly".

359
00:15:56,625 --> 00:15:59,425
I'm Willow, of this impermanent Earth.

360
00:16:00,225 --> 00:16:02,090
You seem to really be
enjoying this show.

361
00:16:02,095 --> 00:16:04,160
Would you want to be
on my Insta Live review?

362
00:16:04,165 --> 00:16:06,890
Sure. I'm really charismatic.

363
00:16:06,895 --> 00:16:09,200
Okay.

364
00:16:09,205 --> 00:16:10,630
So tell me your thoughts on...

365
00:16:10,635 --> 00:16:13,930
"A Single Pringle"
is the opposite of art.

366
00:16:13,935 --> 00:16:16,400
Everyone knows that real art
is putting two Pringles

367
00:16:16,405 --> 00:16:18,370
in your mouth facing opposite directions

368
00:16:18,375 --> 00:16:20,445
so you look like a potato chip duck.

369
00:16:22,045 --> 00:16:25,750
I, for one hand, am personally offended.

370
00:16:25,755 --> 00:16:28,620
That's one way to look at it,
but don't you think

371
00:16:28,625 --> 00:16:31,450
you're taking this
a little too personally?

372
00:16:31,455 --> 00:16:35,065
Oh, so I'm guessing
you haven't seen that, then?

373
00:16:37,865 --> 00:16:39,930
This is still "iCarly",

374
00:16:39,935 --> 00:16:41,500
but it's grown up now,

375
00:16:41,505 --> 00:16:43,700
so today I thought I'd share
my skincare routine.

376
00:16:43,705 --> 00:16:46,530
What is this hell?

377
00:16:46,535 --> 00:16:48,040
My review?

378
00:16:48,045 --> 00:16:51,040
If you want to see a show
all about hating the internet...

379
00:16:51,045 --> 00:16:55,640
And me, come on down
to the "Museum of Influence".

380
00:16:55,645 --> 00:16:58,110
Listen, Carly, us influencers,

381
00:16:58,115 --> 00:16:59,650
we have to stick together.

382
00:16:59,655 --> 00:17:02,325
I'll go find more people
to be mad with us.

383
00:17:04,995 --> 00:17:06,920
Hello, sister.

384
00:17:06,925 --> 00:17:10,265
Or should I say... nemesister?

385
00:17:11,795 --> 00:17:15,030
Spencer, what is this place?
It's really mean.

386
00:17:15,035 --> 00:17:17,770
To me, and to lattes.

387
00:17:17,775 --> 00:17:22,000
- Mission accomplished.
- Seriously. People are pissed.

388
00:17:22,005 --> 00:17:23,440
I just talked to this girl, Willow,

389
00:17:23,445 --> 00:17:26,075
and she said this entire place
is really offensive.

390
00:17:28,785 --> 00:17:30,640
God, she doesn't even understand

391
00:17:30,645 --> 00:17:32,610
that you're mocking her
and her profile pics.

392
00:17:32,615 --> 00:17:34,885
Mission accomplished, the sequel!

393
00:17:36,425 --> 00:17:38,290
You know, the internet has the power

394
00:17:38,295 --> 00:17:40,090
to bring people together.

395
00:17:40,095 --> 00:17:45,290
But to you, I guess everything
online is just some big joke.

396
00:17:45,295 --> 00:17:47,960
Maybe I've never made a fancy sculpture

397
00:17:47,965 --> 00:17:49,900
or painted a flower

398
00:17:49,905 --> 00:17:54,270
or put a Pringle on a pedestal,
but my content still has value.

399
00:17:54,275 --> 00:17:55,540
And you know what?

400
00:17:55,545 --> 00:17:58,070
Likes do make my empty soul feel better!

401
00:17:58,075 --> 00:18:00,570
But that's just because
it's been scientifically proven

402
00:18:00,575 --> 00:18:01,815
to release dopamine!

403
00:18:05,915 --> 00:18:07,880
Hey, Millicent. Did I miss anything?

404
00:18:07,885 --> 00:18:09,620
Just my sales spike.

405
00:18:09,625 --> 00:18:12,720
This exhibit is just a reminder
for people to be more careful

406
00:18:12,725 --> 00:18:14,720
- about what they post online.
- Hmm.

407
00:18:14,725 --> 00:18:16,825
Anyway, I'm sad. What's in the bag?

408
00:18:17,835 --> 00:18:20,530
Well, I thought since you're
starting a new business,

409
00:18:20,535 --> 00:18:24,260
I'd buy you... a new keyboard.

410
00:18:24,265 --> 00:18:27,670
- Wow! Thanks, Freddie.
- Yeah.

411
00:18:27,675 --> 00:18:29,670
So this place is what,

412
00:18:29,675 --> 00:18:32,070
just skewering things on the internet?

413
00:18:32,075 --> 00:18:35,315
Ooh, where's the part where
they make fun of JavaScript?

414
00:18:37,855 --> 00:18:40,810
@NotMilllicent123.

415
00:18:40,815 --> 00:18:43,450
"Manipulating parents is so easy.

416
00:18:43,455 --> 00:18:47,360
Check out my new keys".

417
00:18:47,365 --> 00:18:48,790
Seriously?

418
00:18:50,365 --> 00:18:54,435
It says NotMillicent123,
so obviously it's not me.

419
00:18:55,535 --> 00:18:58,030
Millicent.

420
00:18:58,035 --> 00:19:00,500
Ugh, fine. It's me.

421
00:19:00,505 --> 00:19:03,075
Millicent. 123.

422
00:19:04,915 --> 00:19:06,810
So, you're not actually traumatized?

423
00:19:06,815 --> 00:19:09,040
No, I just took advantage
of your insecurities

424
00:19:09,045 --> 00:19:10,781
about being a new parent
to get some cool stuff.

425
00:19:10,785 --> 00:19:12,450
- Mm.
- Thanks for the keyboard.

426
00:19:12,455 --> 00:19:14,480
Yeah, bah, bah. Uh-uh.

427
00:19:14,485 --> 00:19:17,320
- Was there an apology in there?
- Come on!

428
00:19:17,325 --> 00:19:19,350
An admission of guilt isn't enough?

429
00:19:19,355 --> 00:19:21,290
Not in 2021.

430
00:19:21,295 --> 00:19:24,590
Who do you think you are,
a high-profile male celebrity?

431
00:19:24,595 --> 00:19:27,230
You pretended to be hurt
so that I would buy you stuff.

432
00:19:27,235 --> 00:19:28,900
It's my keyboard now.

433
00:19:28,905 --> 00:19:30,360
You're right.

434
00:19:30,365 --> 00:19:32,970
Thank you for teaching me
a moral lesson.

435
00:19:33,375 --> 00:19:36,045
It's better than any gift
you could have ever gotten me.

436
00:19:37,275 --> 00:19:39,510
You're welcome, Millicent.

437
00:19:39,515 --> 00:19:42,080
You know what? Here.

438
00:19:42,085 --> 00:19:43,285
Take the keyboard.

439
00:19:43,854 --> 00:19:46,685
You're so easy.

440
00:19:48,255 --> 00:19:49,880
Yo!

441
00:19:49,885 --> 00:19:51,620
Thousands of people saw that Live,

442
00:19:51,625 --> 00:19:54,460
and they're coming here, like,
to actually protest!

443
00:19:54,465 --> 00:19:57,530
Well, I'm glad the world is
finally gonna take my side.

444
00:19:57,535 --> 00:19:59,460
Oh, no, they're coming to protest you.

445
00:19:59,465 --> 00:20:01,800
Carly, you are so radical!

446
00:20:01,805 --> 00:20:03,730
You started a whole-ass riot.

447
00:20:03,735 --> 00:20:05,700
It's yet to be seen
what this will do for sales,

448
00:20:05,705 --> 00:20:08,440
but I'll keep y'all posted.

449
00:20:08,445 --> 00:20:10,200
Oh, crap.

450
00:20:10,205 --> 00:20:12,470
Gamers are putting
down their controllers,

451
00:20:12,475 --> 00:20:14,211
foodies are sharpening their knives,

452
00:20:14,215 --> 00:20:17,750
and ASMR stans are coming here
to yell at you, quietly.

453
00:20:17,755 --> 00:20:20,015
Screw you, loser.

454
00:20:23,225 --> 00:20:25,850
After witnessing
Carly Shay's livestream,

455
00:20:25,855 --> 00:20:27,560
I encourage all other members

456
00:20:27,565 --> 00:20:29,220
of the Coalition of Latte Artists

457
00:20:29,225 --> 00:20:32,190
to cancel Spencer Shay!

458
00:20:32,195 --> 00:20:34,165
His art is like expired milk.

459
00:20:35,205 --> 00:20:36,760
Everybody listen up.

460
00:20:36,765 --> 00:20:38,330
My name is Willow,

461
00:20:38,335 --> 00:20:42,570
and as an influencer
who influences the influential,

462
00:20:42,575 --> 00:20:46,140
I am appalled by this sham of a museum.

463
00:20:46,145 --> 00:20:48,240
It's a revolution!

464
00:20:48,245 --> 00:20:50,810
- Spencer sucks.
- Spencer sucks.

465
00:20:50,815 --> 00:20:52,480
Yeah, get him!

466
00:20:52,485 --> 00:20:55,780
Hey, hey, thank you all for coming.

467
00:20:55,785 --> 00:20:58,820
- Boo!
- Boo!

468
00:20:58,825 --> 00:21:00,990
Hey, look, I just want everyone to know

469
00:21:00,995 --> 00:21:02,460
I didn't mean to offend you all.

470
00:21:02,465 --> 00:21:05,560
I only meant to offend
my sister, Carly Shay.

471
00:21:05,565 --> 00:21:07,090
There she is! She sucks!

472
00:21:07,095 --> 00:21:08,930
Just apologize to these people.

473
00:21:08,935 --> 00:21:10,730
We demand an apology.

474
00:21:10,735 --> 00:21:12,935
I can barely hear whoever said that.

475
00:21:14,105 --> 00:21:16,840
Look, Spencer, it's okay
to apologize for something

476
00:21:16,845 --> 00:21:18,975
that you didn't necessarily mean to...

477
00:21:20,475 --> 00:21:23,180
Oh.

478
00:21:23,185 --> 00:21:25,580
Spencer, I'm sorry.

479
00:21:25,585 --> 00:21:28,550
I shouldn't have ignored your feelings.

480
00:21:28,555 --> 00:21:30,450
I real apologize.

481
00:21:30,455 --> 00:21:33,020
Hey, Carly, I'm sorry

482
00:21:33,025 --> 00:21:35,120
that I retooled my entire art exhibit

483
00:21:35,125 --> 00:21:38,190
to critique the internet
and take you down.

484
00:21:38,195 --> 00:21:40,090
Come here.

485
00:21:40,095 --> 00:21:42,032
Oh, but you've got to admit,
that small black room

486
00:21:42,036 --> 00:21:44,161
where you can scream
into the void is pretty sweet.

487
00:21:46,776 --> 00:21:48,471
Yeah, we're still mad.

488
00:21:48,476 --> 00:21:51,241
- Yeah!
- What, seriously?

489
00:21:54,146 --> 00:21:56,281
I sold out, baby!

490
00:21:58,056 --> 00:22:01,281
- Harper, a little help here?
- Oh, on it.

491
00:22:01,286 --> 00:22:02,651
Look, over there!

492
00:22:02,656 --> 00:22:04,621
Someone's sharing their negative opinion

493
00:22:04,626 --> 00:22:07,721
about a TV show you liked as a child!

494
00:22:07,726 --> 00:22:10,221
- Let's get 'em.
- Yeah!

495
00:22:10,226 --> 00:22:12,161
Get them! Let's get that guy!

496
00:22:16,266 --> 00:22:18,631
You're welcome.

497
00:22:23,905 --> 00:22:25,970
? Remember that we all post ?

498
00:22:25,975 --> 00:22:28,480
? From our own place of privilege ?

499
00:22:28,485 --> 00:22:30,840
? Just take into account ?

500
00:22:30,845 --> 00:22:33,650
? We all have disparate opinions ?

501
00:22:33,655 --> 00:22:36,120
? So if you're feeling worried ?

502
00:22:36,125 --> 00:22:39,090
? You might be problematic ?

503
00:22:39,095 --> 00:22:41,590
? Just call up your friend Millicent ?

504
00:22:41,595 --> 00:22:43,860
? Or go read a book ?

505
00:22:43,865 --> 00:22:45,960
? It's not my job to educate you ?

506
00:22:45,965 --> 00:22:50,400
? Unless you pay me money ?

507
00:22:50,405 --> 00:22:52,330
- Whoo!
- Mm-hmm,

508
00:22:52,335 --> 00:22:55,740
- Yes!
- Mm-hmm.

509
00:22:55,745 --> 00:22:58,115
Oh, my God, I'm gonna win a Grammy!

510
00:23:29,000 --> 00:23:32,000
- Synced and corrected by Firefly -
- www.addic7ed.com -