Oi, I said open the door!
- How d'you explain it, Baz? - Open this door. I need a slash, man.
- How d'you explain us getting six and you getting three? - Open this door!
How d'you explain that, lad?
- I can't, lad, can I? - Shall I tell you?
Open this door!
I know what you're going to say, Johnno, so say it, yeah?
- You did a deal, mate. - I said open the door!
- You did. - No, I never.
You did a deal behind our backs, mate, and that explains that.
Shut your mouth, lad!
That explains how they found that stash on Berry Street.
Your big mouth told them everything.
- I never, lad. I never. - Yeah, it did, it did.
- Open this door! - You got that in return.
Open the door!
Eh, quit banging on that door! Will you pack it in?!
Who are you talking to?
Open the door!
CREDITS
When are you letting me out?
When are you letting me out, then?
Come on, mate.
Honest to God, I never grassed on anyone, man.
I swear to God.
I'm not a snitch.
Honestly, lad.
Lad, I swear to God. Yeah? Lad, all right?
Fucking grass!
Right! In holding cell 2!
You're Mark Cobden? Yes.
Date of birth?
17th April 1964.
And what religion are you, Mark?
Er, haven't really got one.
I don't go to church or anything, you know.
I'll put you down as Anglican, then, yeah?
But, um, I suppose I'm more lapsed Catholic than
Right.
Have you been in prison before?
No.
First time for everything, eh?
This way, please. Are you feeling suicidal?
What?
Are you feeling suicidal?
Are you contemplating killing yourself?
No.
Good.
OK.
If you can just look into the camera for me, please?
Are you currently on medication?
Er, no.
Have you ever contracted a sexually transmitted disease?
No.
Open your mouth.
Tongue out.
Arms up.
Have you ever suffered depression?
When I was younger, I might have been
Is that a yes or a no? No.
Top off.
Arms up.
Have you ever suffered from any other mental illness?
No.
And do you have any specific dietary requirements?
No.
OK, pants down.
And squat.
OK, pants up.
You can get dressed now.
Jawad, Irvine, Cobden. Follow me.
Just over there.
Right, through you go.
These are your PIN codes.
Thanks, boss. Ta.
You get a two minute phone call.
Thanks.
Oh, shit!
I forgot the number.
I left it on the phone.
Who were you going to phone? Parents.
You get paper, stamps and envelope tomorrow.
You can write to them.
Unless there's another number you know.
The wife? She Up to you, mate.
She, um
Yeah, all right. Thank you.
Hello?
It's me.
I got four years.
I need my, er my mam and dad's number.
I'll get it.
Have you got a pen?
Thank you.
You ready? Hello? I'm here.
0151...
...496...
...0293.
Right.
Can I make another call? No. Sorry.
Right, can you phone them for me?
Can't you do it?
No. I'm only allowed one call, and this is it.
What shall I tell them?
Just tell them I'm in Craigmore.
They know I got four years.
They were in court for that.
Just tell them I'm here.
Right.
How's Tom?
Don't go there, Mark.
In you go.
Cobden? Yeah?
This is a first night cell,
so called because you spend your first night in it.
In you go.
Tomorrow is induction.
After induction, you get taken to the new wing.
So this is for one night only.
Oh, right. Yeah.
This is your emergency call button,
so called because you use it only in an emergency.
Right? Yeah. Right.
I knew Bob Warren.
He was a good man.
I know.
What about you? What did they give you?
Four years. Cat one, receiving.
That just leaves you.
Oi! Mark, innit?
Yeah? Man in his 50s, yeah?
Yeah. What are you in for?
Are you a nonce?
I killed a man.
Here, did you hear that?
The old man said he killed someone.
You expect us to believe that?!
I've left you a coffee downstairs.
No shirts. In the basket.
You haven't ironed 'em?
No. I told you, I'm not ironing your shirts any more.
You said you'd still iron my work shirts.
No, I didn't. For Christ's sake, woman!
There might be one in David's room.
22 years married and you suddenly decide...
...to turn into a feminist!
_
Karen?
_
Mark Cobden?
Yeah. It's, 'Yes, boss.
'Yes, Mr McNally,' or, 'Yes, boss.'
Yes, boss.
Get your stuff. Induction. Follow me.
Wait here.
Irvine Nice to see you again, lad.
Yeah, boss.
Follow me, you lot.
Come on.
I'm your personal officer.
Any problems, you come to me, right?
If I can't sort it, I'll find someone who can.
Right, boss.
Is Gabber still here, boss? Gabber?
Fat bastard with a shaved head.
That's half the prison, that is, lad.
What's his proper name?
I just know him as Gabber, boss.
I owe him money from last time I was in.
And you're worried about that, yeah? Yeah, boss.
Well, find out his proper name and I'll look into it for you.
Thanks, boss.
Right, in you go. Find a seat.
I got banged up with you three years ago. All right, boys?
Don't sit next to him. He's a grass.
I'm no grass, me, you know. You're a grass.
Did they find my stash on Berry Street, yeah? Quiet, please.
Shut up!
Hey! Hey!
What? Shut up!
If you don't shut up.
I'll nick you, and if I nick you,
it's seg, and what a start that'll be, eh?
Now, you're unlucky to come in over a weekend because it means...
...you'll spend your first couple of days banged up.
You might get association later on...
...but that depends on staffing levels at the time.
In front of you, you'll see sheets of paper.
On the first sheet of paper, where it says 'name'
and 'prison number'.
I want you to write your name and prison number.
Well, go on, then.
Anyone in for the first time?
Er, yes, boss.
Welcome.
Cheers.
Name and prison number? All done, yeah?
Right, now write down the names and numbers of the people...
...you want to call during your time here.
We'll then phone them...
...and see if they wish speak to you and if they do
Keep it moving. All the way through.
6589 Jawad,
6675 Irwin with Officer Khan.
8738 Milner,
8871 Travers with me.
3944 Cobden,
8977 Schofield with Officer McNally.
You two with me.
Cobden, this is your new abode.
Am I in here as well, boss? No.
Bernard? New padmate.
In you go.
All right?
Er, Mark.
Bernard.
Well, top or bottom?
I'm bottom.
All right.
What are you doing?
Oh, I'm just putting my things No.
What are you doing?
How long?
Oh, er, four years.
What for?
Dangerous driving.
Four years for dangerous driving?
Yeah.
You kill someone, then?
How long are you doing?
Ten.
What for?
Manslaughter.
Who did you kill?
My father.
Your hands are soft.
Yeah, I'm I'm a teacher.
Oh, well, was a teacher. Where at?
Bellbridge Comp.
They put you in here to spy on me?
Why would I spy on you?
The case, that's why.
What case?
My case against the prison.
No more. Right?
Shtoom from now on, eh?
Shtoom.
Who's that?
Tom. My son.
None of his mother, then? No. No.
So you're separated, then?
Yeah. Yeah.
Nosy, ain't I?
Yeah.
You know how many staff there are in this nick?
And I don't just mean officers
I mean everyone ancillary staff, admin, all that.
How many?
Don't know.
Not far short of 1,000.
How many prisoners?
Don't know.
Not far short of 1,000.
That's one for one.
One member of staff per prisoner.
You know how much that costs per prisoner?
No. No.
30 grand.
30 big ones.
That's six British winters on an Aussie beach.
Huh. That's money down the drain, mate. You come in here bad...
...and you go out worse.
It's money down the drain, and everybody knows it,
but everyone keeps shtoom...
...cos it's money going into their pockets, isn't it?
1,000 pockets here, 1,000 in Wandsworth, 1,000 in Walton.
So what if this place is a shithole?
So what if it does no fucking good whatsoever?
It's money going into people's pockets.
That's my case, mate.
Right.
Are you all right?
What is it?
You asthmatic?
You get panic attacks?
What do you take for them?
Push your diaphragm out.
If you push your diaphragm out,
you get more room in your lungs, so you get more air
Ah
Shall I get someone? No.
OK.
I'm getting someone right now.
Shut it, will you?
They're busy.
There's a lot of this about.
Why do you do it?
What's your favourite tipple?
Eh?
What's your favourite tipple?
What's your drink?
Vodka.
Why vodka?
No smell. Yeah?
Imagine your first one of the day.
Imagine the hit you get from that.
That's what I get from this.
What's going on?
There's a man bleeding to death in here.
No, it's not as bad as it looks.
What am I going to do with you, eh, Bernard? Don't know, boss.
You promised me you wouldn't do this again, lad.
I know, boss. Look, there are no beds in the hospital wing,
so if I take you out.
I'm going to have to put you into segregation.
Do you understand that? Yes, boss.
So are you going to stop it? No, boss.
Then I'm going to have to come in and get you.
I've got AIDS.
Oh, don't say that, lad.
You say that and I'm going to have to come back mobhanded.
I'll smear you with my AIDS infected blood.
Don't threaten me, lad. If you threaten me.
I'll have to come in and I'll have to twist you up.
I'll smear you with it. Don't threaten me, son.
I'll soak you with it. I'll have to act on it.
I'll smear you with my AIDS infected blood!
What am I supposed to do in here?!
They're coming.
I'd stand back if I was you.
Right.
Stand back, Cobden.
In you go.
Put your hands up! Stop struggling!
Get off me!
Get out. I know!
I know!
You set? All right.
Bernard again? Uh huh.
Yeah. Huh?
He's my best customer.
What's your name?
Mark.
Brendan.
What are you doing?
Oh, four years.
You? Life.
Rather blood than shite.
Lunch.
Keep it moving!
Cheese or chicken? Cheese, please.
Cheese or chicken? Chicken.
Chicken, mate. Chicken, my brother. Chicken. Chicken.
I'm Stanley Timmins. Right?
You want to know who I am? Yeah? I'm Stanley Victor Timmins!
These screws,
they know I talk to myself all the time and are, like
Who are you looking at?!
No No one. You were looking at me.
No, I wasn't.
I saw you. I saw you looking at me.
No, I I just glanced at you, mate, that's all.
You glanced? Yeah.
I heard you shouting, so I glanced at you.
I'm sorry if I upset you. I'll glance you, mate.
I'm sorry, all right? I'll glance you.
I, Stanley Victor Timmins, will glance you, mate.
What do you say? In fact everyone on the wing right now?
Get back in your cell. You know I got tornados at the ready, innit?
Boss, you all right? Yeah, you?
Sound as a pound.
Something I can do for you?
I see your lad's in Lowood Prison, boss.
My lad?
Your David.
I haven't got a lad called David.
That's strange, that...
...cos you mention him on Facebook,
except there you say he's working away.
But he's not, is he, boss?
He's in Lowood Prison.
Look, we're not really that close.
I don't think you can use this against me...
...cos there's no real bond between us.
No? No.
Then how come you're down to visit him tomorrow?
And bond or no bond, you'd want him to be comfy, wouldn't you?
Yeah, well, we know loads of lads there.
They'll make sure he's all right.
Is that a threat?
No, boss.
So if I ignore this conversation, what'll happen?
He won't be as comfy as he could've been.
Or as safe?
Maybe.
All right, so you make him comfortable, you make him safe,
what do I do in return?
We'll let you know about that.
All right. Give me a few days to think it over.
Course, boss.
Boss! Boss!
Hey, I put an app in two weeks ago for a change of wing, and I haven't...
...heard nothing yet. What's happening? Two weeks is nothing.
What do you mean, two weeks is nothing? What are you on about?
It is when you're surrounded by nutters.
Hi. All right, love.
You're going to have to cancel Maureen tonight.
Why? We need to talk.
What about? Our David.
That prison's nearly 200 miles away, how could they know?
Staff.
What do you mean, staff?
Well, they knew we're visiting tomorrow, so
Staff it's got to be.
Are you sure it was a threat?
It was a threat.
He said he'd be well looked after if I play ball.
If I don't play ball, then...
...he'll get hurt.
And what does playing ball entail?
Eric, what does playing ball entail?
I don't know. Well, what are we going to do?
Speak to our David in the morning.
May you rot in prison and burn in hell, you drunken bastard!
He was twice the man that you are.
You drunken bastard!
Drunken bastard. Twice the man that you are.
Ten times the man that you are.
What's happening?
You got any sugar? Er, don't know. I don't
I don't use it. Here's some.
It's Bernard's, that. Bernard won't mind.
Er, you know him? Yeah.
Excuse me. What?
You should ask Bernard first.
Ask Bernard? Yeah.
Ask that mad bastard, yeah? Yeah. Yeah.
I tell you what, mate, your card's marked.
Go on, do one, Grandad.
Go on, give it here.
This is what we do to a grass!
Go! Go! Go! Fucking hell!
Back in your cell!
Fuck's sake.
Oh, God!
Fucking hurry up, then!
Oh, God!
Fucking hurry up! Hurry up!
OK, mate.
Just to the side, please.
Arms up.
Hi.
Ooh! All right, Mum?
Are you all right? All right, lad?
Do you want some Mars bars? Please. Yeah?
Gosh, you've lost weight.
Have I? Yeah.
I'm eating all right.
Never enough, like. We don't do much, just laze round all day.
How is everyone?
Yeah, good.
You?
Good. Missing you, son, but I'm all right.
Dad?
Huh, your dad's your dad.
You still not doing his shirts?
He's got no chance.
Here you are. That my shirt?
Yeah.
We've got a problem, son.
Yeah?
You told anyone what I do, son?
No.
You sure?
Why would I tell anyone you're a screw?
What good's that going to do me in here?
Well, the lads in my nick know that you're in here.
How?
Don't know.
They said you'd be well looked after, though.
Only I might have to do them a favour in return.
Shit.
Yeah.
What are you going to do?
Keep you safe.
How?
VP wing. No! Well, it's the only way.
I'm not having the entire prison...
...thinking I'm a nonce or a grass, Dad. No way.
They're not all nonces and grasses. No way! It won't work anyway.
They'd just get some nonce to slash me, you know that.
We'll have to have you ghosted, then. What's ghosted?
Moved to another prison. I'm just getting used to this one.
Well, that's the only choice, son. All right?
You can't do three years on seg, it's VP wing or ghosted.
Take me chances as I am.
No, you won't. I'm not letting you do that.
VP or ghosted.
Ghosted.
Good.
I'll talk to my governor in the morning.
She'll speak to the boss here...
...and we'll have you moved in a few days.
It will be all right.
I promise.
Do you think he's lost weight?
No. I do.
You remember him from when he was at home.
He lost most of that weight on remand.
He's fine.
Horrible places, prisons.
If you can't make up your mind Cheese, please.
Thank you.
Yeah, I'll have a cake. Yeah.
Thank you.
I'll have that. Whoa, what are you doing?
Behave.
Hi.
It's Mark, innit? Yeah. Yeah. Mark.
Is Bernard back?
No, he's still, you know
You know, er, north of the equator, we all walk clockwise.
South of the equator, they all walk anticlockwise.
There's a prison in Uganda, right on the equator.
It's fucking chaos.
Ha! Yeah.
Good one, that.
_
You ready? Er, yes, boss.
Who's visiting you? My parents, boss.
Nice.
Come on, you two.
Are you all right? I'm OK.
Here we go.
Take a seat.
Step forward.
Take a seat.
And step forward.
Thank you. Arms up.
Cobden? Yeah.
To the right. Thank you.
McAdams?
Arms up, please.
Turn around.
Thank you. Take a seat.
Come through, please.
Hello, gorgeous!
Oh, I've missed you.
Hiya.
All right, Mum? All right?
Ooh!
Hi, Dad. All right?
Good to see you.
How are you, Dad? OK.
I thought you weren't coming then.
You tired?
I couldn't sleep last night, thinking about you coming here.
Have you seen much of Tom?
She brought him round on Sunday. Yeah, she's been great.
She said she doesn't want what happened...
...to come between us and our grandchild.
How was he?
Good. Yeah, we had photos,
but they're on our phones and they took them off us.
Do you think she'd bring him here?
Well, not just yet.
I think she's still in too much pain for that.
Ah.
It's how you see this place.
It's rock bottom, yeah,
but it's somewhere to start again from. A clean slate.
I don't deserve you. I know.
You see, the thing is, I'm not appealing the conviction.
I'm appealing the sentence.
So he's basically just going to stress that there was...
...only one stab wound, cos the judge never took that into consideration.
There was no discount or anything for that.
So we'll see
There you go, Mark. Ah. Thank you.
You've been watching me like a hawk, Mum.
Have I? I'm fine, honestly.
I'm fine.
I mean, it's noisy, it's boring, the food's a bit rubbish,
but apart from that, it's all right.
I wish I had more to complain about. I really do.
You're in here as punishment, son.
Not for it.
Yeah.
Do Do you still see him?
Mmm.
A lot?
I see, er
I see her his wife.
When do you see them?
Just That's it, ladies and gents. Oh.
That's it, I'm afraid.
All right, that's it, Mum.
When will I see you? Next week.
Next week? See you next week, love.
Look after yourself. I love you.
Can you ask Tom to write? Yes. Yeah?
See you, Dad.
All right, take care.
All right, I'll see you soon.
See you, babe. I love you.
See you. See you soon, eh? You take care.
You're sure it was a threat?
Positive. OK.
We won't do anything till we've got your son somewhere safe.
Any ideas?
Chapel Grove.
That could be possible, yeah.
Might take a couple of days, though.
I told him I'd take a few days to think about it.
Good. We'll move David to Chapel Grove...
...and then we'll sort him out.
Thanks, guv.
Excuse me.
Excuse me, mate. It's my turn.
All right, babe, how's it going?
You took my turn, mate.
Piss off.
What? No, no, no, not you.
Some pain in the arse here going on about the phone.
You've took my turn, mate.
Did you go your Debbie's? Yeah?
Yeah?
Nah. I'm all good.
You know me. So go on.
When are you going to come and see us, then, babe?
I'm sorry, mate, but can I have the phone?
Piss off. You took my turn.
I said piss off, or I'll snap your jaw!
Go on.
All right. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
Gimp.
Sorry.
You all right?
All right?
Feeling better?
Yeah.
Do you mind if I close this?
The noise, like.
Yeah.
What, yeah, you mind or, yeah, close it?
Close it.
No sugar.
No?
There was half a bag, and now it's gone.
No idea, mate.
Where's it gone?
Can you hear that?
Bernard?
Bernard, can you hear that?
Bernard?
Hey.
Bernard?
Bernard, what's
What's happening?
Hey, come on. Come on, mate, you're scaring me.
Bernard?
Fuck
Bernard? Hey, come on, someone's coming.
Someone will be here in a minute. Bernard?
Hey.
There's a man in here not breathing!
Help!
Come on, let me get you down.
Let me get you down.
Come on, mate. Come on.
Stay with me now. Stay with me, laddie.
Come on.
Come on, lad.
Come on. Bernard, come on.
Can you hear me? Fuck off!
There's a man in here not breathing!
What are you playing at?!
Shit, Bernard, come on. Fucking hell.
Come on, lad. Come on.
Get in here! Code blue.
Immediate assistance.
Bravo Wing. On the twos, 39. Please, come on! Get in here!
I can't. Please get in here! I can't without support.
What support?! I've got a man here, he's
Mark, I need you to remain calm.
Assistance is coming.
I don't know what to do with him.
Move your arses! Please help him. Come on. Please!
OK, Mark, well done. Thank you.
Stand back. Stand back!
Stand back, please.
Shit
Fuck.
Hello.
Hi.
Mark, isn't it?
Yeah.
Can I come in?
Yes.
I'm Marie Louise O'Dell.
I'm a Catholic nun, part of the chaplaincy team.
I'm not into God, I'm afraid.
Oh, you don't know what you're missing.
I'm really sorry about Bernard.
They're saying it was suicide.
Yeah.
How?
He saved up his meds, took them all in one go.
You been in prison before?
No.
Difficult.
Yeah.
What do you do on the outside?
I'm a teacher.
Or was a teacher, yeah.
Oh, Mark, you could be the answer to my prayers.
Stop there.
Come on, in you go.
Hi, Mark. Welcome.
Hello. Come on in.
Do you want to take a seat?
Yeah. Yep.
Come on, lads.
Welcome. Come on in, everybody. Just take a seat, grab a seat.
Yeah.
What's happening, lad?
OK, first things first, we've got a couple of new faces with us today.
You all right?
Hiya. You all right?
Mark's a teacher, and he's promised to sort you lot out.
Everyone is going to be sharing some of their experiences.
Daniel's going to start us off today...
...by telling us how he ended up here.
Daniel?
Erm, well, I killed someone in a fight.
Another young man?
Could you say a bit more?
Sorry, I don't know if I can, you know.
I know I said I would, but It's OK.
Yeah. It's OK, no worries.
Can we go to you, Barry?
It's Baz, Miss.
Oh, sorry, Baz.
Baz has been injured recently...
...and has agreed to tell us about it.
Yeah, erm,
well, I got a shorter sentence than these lads I was up with,
which made some people think I'm a grass,
and I'm not.
See, these kids, like, what they did is,
they, like, boiled a kettle and poured all the sugar in...
...so it'd stick to me flesh...
...and then, like, chucked it in me face.
The thing is, like, I know who they are who did it, yeah,
but they did it because they thought I was a grass so...
...the last thing I want to do is grass them up...
...and prove them right, innit?
So now I'm hoping that they think...
...that this is enough and that they, erm, that they leave me alone.
Like, I'm I'm only telling you all this because, you know, like,
these are the types of things that can happen...
...while you're doing jug,
so, I mean, stay out of jail and that, kids.
That's it, Miss.
Thanks, Baz.
Hello?
All right, Dad?
All right, son. Are you OK?
I'm great. I'm great.
Let me just, erm, let me just get your mum.
Sonia?
I'll just put you on loudspeaker, all right?
It's our David. Oh.
You all right, son? I'm great, Mum. I'm great.
Where are you?
Chapel Grove.
What's it like?
Looks OK. Good, well run nick.
I'm in a first night cell,
so won't be on the wing till tomorrow, but it's all looking good.
Do you feel safe?
Totally. Totally, Dad.
Right, well, look. we'll, erm, we'll organise a VO...
...and we'll come and see you as soon as we can, son, yeah?
All right. Yeah.
Do you need anything sending in?
Just send me
Yeah, OK. I'll sort that out.
Jawad.
Yes, boss. On your bed.
Why, boss? We're coming in.
What? Going to twist your padmate up.
What? Come on, then!
Come on, you fucking bastards!
Come on, then!
What are you doing?!
Stay on your bed and shut up!
Get off the fucking
Get off! My freaking head!
Watch it, mate, watch it!
What the fuck?!
Out of order, that, boss!
Any complaints, you know the procedure.
You're dead hard, aren't you? Three of yous, one of me!
What? What are you looking at?
At what?!
Threaten my son, and you pay for it.
Hello? Hiya, Dad.
Hi, son.
There's someone here who wants a word with you.
Yeah?
Hi, Dad.
Tom?
Yeah.
Wasn't wasn't expecting you.
No?
Does your mam know you're speaking to me?
No.
I'm not sure we should be, then.
Dad, I'm 14. I can talk to whoever I want.
You can't, son.
It's entirely up to her whether we speak together or not,
and she don't want it.
Two minutes, then.
I want to come and see you.
I'm not sure about that, son.
It's not such a good idea right now.
I want to come and see you, Dad!
OK. Maybe next time Gran and Grandad come.
Right.
How are you?
Fine.
Gran and Grandad, they all right?
Fine.
It's lovely to hear your voice, son.
Give us that, lad.
Hey.
Hey, give it me back.
Give me that back, please.
I was on the phone...
...to my son there, so give it me back, please.
Look, it's one thing taking me food,
that's me suffering, but taking me call, that's me family suffering,
and that's not on, that. John Milner, please.
So give it me back! Yo, what's up?
Give it me back!
Wha Yeah!
Give it me back.
Yeah.
If you don't give it me back, I'm going to hit you, I mean it.
Come on, then.
Hit me.
Sorry about that
Fuck.
Oh
You should've hit him back.
I'm a teacher.
A fucking teacher.
Your life won't be worth living now.
He hasn't stopped banging on.
Ta.
You've been asking for me? Yeah.
What is it?
Just wondering, boss.
Wondering what?
Why you and your lad don't get on.
We do.
But he's somewhere safe now,
somewhere you can't lay a finger on him.
He's in Chapel Grove.
You fucking
You lay a finger on that lad, and I'll fucking kill you!
I'll rip your head off, I swear to God.
I'll kill you.
Don't you go anywhere near him, do you hear me?
Let him go! Let him go!
Get him off me!
I swear to God, I'll kill you!
Get off me!
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