1
00:00:01,109 --> 00:00:03,594
- I need some advice.
- About what?

2
00:00:03,696 --> 00:00:05,421
Doesn't matter, just go.

3
00:00:06,328 --> 00:00:09,210
Never play poker with a man
named after a city.

4
00:00:09,468 --> 00:00:11,068
Where were you 25 years ago

5
00:00:11,093 --> 00:00:13,193
when Toledo Tony cleaned me out?

6
00:00:13,450 --> 00:00:14,718
You know, it helps

7
00:00:14,743 --> 00:00:16,351
if you're more specific
about these things.

8
00:00:16,376 --> 00:00:19,203
Okay, fine. There is something
that's been driving me crazy

9
00:00:19,228 --> 00:00:21,628
forever, and I haven't
complained about it because,

10
00:00:21,653 --> 00:00:23,653
you know, healthy,
bigger, better person.

11
00:00:23,678 --> 00:00:27,547
But my husband owns a bar and
I'm a recovering alcoholic.

12
00:00:27,572 --> 00:00:30,085
And here's his
non-alcoholic drink menu:

13
00:00:30,327 --> 00:00:33,695
coffee, water and
lemonade from a powder.

14
00:00:34,085 --> 00:00:35,326
And yes, that's a real menu.

15
00:00:35,351 --> 00:00:37,257
He actually printed that up.

16
00:00:37,497 --> 00:00:39,263
So here's what I need to know from you:

17
00:00:39,562 --> 00:00:41,499
why doesn't he love me?

18
00:00:42,797 --> 00:00:45,659
Evel Knievel couldn't make
the leap you just did.

19
00:00:45,915 --> 00:00:47,289
It's not a leap.

20
00:00:47,314 --> 00:00:49,050
Why can't he put some thought into it?

21
00:00:49,075 --> 00:00:50,202
Why don't you put some thought into it?

22
00:00:50,227 --> 00:00:51,766
Why don't you put some thought into it?

23
00:00:52,805 --> 00:00:54,378
You're a creative person,

24
00:00:54,403 --> 00:00:56,655
you certainly have some
experience with drinking,

25
00:00:56,680 --> 00:00:58,026
why don't you come up with something

26
00:00:58,051 --> 00:00:59,428
and see if he'll put it on the menu?

27
00:00:59,529 --> 00:01:01,262
Well, when you decide
to give up therapy,

28
00:01:01,287 --> 00:01:03,570
might I suggest Girl Scouts leader?

29
00:01:04,066 --> 00:01:06,466
Someday, I'm gonna write a paper on you.

30
00:01:06,570 --> 00:01:08,914
But not until I'm ready to be famous.

31
00:01:09,539 --> 00:01:11,172
You're cranky. Does that mean

32
00:01:11,197 --> 00:01:12,609
you're still not having sex with anyone?

33
00:01:13,383 --> 00:01:15,803
I have a person I speak
to about these things,

34
00:01:15,828 --> 00:01:17,391
and it's not you.

35
00:01:17,416 --> 00:01:19,781
Wait. You have a therapist?

36
00:01:19,806 --> 00:01:21,439
All therapists have therapists.

37
00:01:21,464 --> 00:01:23,831
So if you have a therapist
and your therapist

38
00:01:23,856 --> 00:01:26,281
has a therapist and that
therapist has a therapist,

39
00:01:26,306 --> 00:01:28,640
that means everybody in
the world has a therapist,

40
00:01:28,665 --> 00:01:30,625
and that means that I will
be someone's therapist,

41
00:01:30,650 --> 00:01:33,016
so you should really be paying me.

42
00:01:34,937 --> 00:01:36,631
How am I the one who's still single?

43
00:01:36,656 --> 00:01:39,190
I knew it.

44
00:01:39,433 --> 00:01:44,433
- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -
-- for www.addic7ed.com --

45
00:01:46,571 --> 00:01:48,882
I've got carrot, beet,
turmeric for Jill.

46
00:01:48,907 --> 00:01:50,430
Oh, that's me.

47
00:01:51,250 --> 00:01:53,233
- Trevor?
- Hey, Jill.

48
00:01:53,811 --> 00:01:55,852
Oh, God, why now?

49
00:01:57,825 --> 00:01:58,991
Hey!

50
00:01:59,351 --> 00:02:00,517
Oh, pardon my appearance.

51
00:02:00,542 --> 00:02:02,642
I just... I just ran five miles.

52
00:02:02,667 --> 00:02:05,355
Oh, what a coinky-dink...
I just ran six.

53
00:02:05,380 --> 00:02:08,281
Really? Did a professional
makeup artist run alongside you?

54
00:02:08,306 --> 00:02:10,003
Oh!

55
00:02:10,028 --> 00:02:11,920
Oh, aren't you sweet?

56
00:02:12,022 --> 00:02:15,319
- So how you been?
- Good, good. Yeah, in fact,

57
00:02:15,344 --> 00:02:17,725
- I was thinking about you last week.
- Do tell.

58
00:02:18,086 --> 00:02:20,393
Well, my allergies flared up.

59
00:02:20,418 --> 00:02:22,806
And, uh, it was just a lot of sneezing.

60
00:02:22,831 --> 00:02:24,914
Really moist.

61
00:02:24,939 --> 00:02:28,147
And the Kleenex box
cover that you gave me,

62
00:02:28,172 --> 00:02:31,155
uh, really turned it into
a positive experience.

63
00:02:31,180 --> 00:02:33,083
Oh, and here I thought the only people

64
00:02:33,108 --> 00:02:34,674
would be using that was your patients.

65
00:02:34,699 --> 00:02:37,049
No, my nose is constantly running.

66
00:02:37,074 --> 00:02:39,442
I ruin a lot of sleeves.

67
00:02:40,382 --> 00:02:42,048
Hey, how about we change the subject?

68
00:02:42,073 --> 00:02:44,728
Kale smoothie with
lady boost for Trevor?

69
00:02:44,753 --> 00:02:46,930
Subject changed.

70
00:02:46,955 --> 00:02:49,936
I'm low in iron and folic acid.

71
00:02:49,961 --> 00:02:51,758
Why should you gals
have all the fun, huh?

72
00:02:53,171 --> 00:02:54,671
Well, your secret's safe with me.

73
00:02:54,696 --> 00:02:57,664
It's funny, 'cause I'm usually
the one keeping the secrets.

74
00:02:57,689 --> 00:02:59,355
'Cause of my work.

75
00:02:59,380 --> 00:03:01,614
Oh, you must have some good ones.

76
00:03:01,639 --> 00:03:03,313
Oh, I really do.

77
00:03:06,047 --> 00:03:07,550
Oh, you want me to tell you.

78
00:03:07,575 --> 00:03:09,208
No, I can't do that.

79
00:03:09,233 --> 00:03:11,688
Although I would be way more
fun at parties if I could.

80
00:03:13,719 --> 00:03:14,624
Oh.

81
00:03:14,649 --> 00:03:16,382
Well, I should get going.

82
00:03:16,407 --> 00:03:18,074
I was just about to say that.

83
00:03:18,099 --> 00:03:19,863
- Sure you were.
- No, no, no, really.

84
00:03:19,888 --> 00:03:21,500
I-I say that all the time.

85
00:03:21,525 --> 00:03:23,336
Here, allow me.

86
00:03:24,461 --> 00:03:25,994
It's the other push.

87
00:03:27,936 --> 00:03:30,422
There's that lady boost kicking in.

88
00:03:31,074 --> 00:03:33,141
Just don't burst into tears on me.

89
00:03:35,496 --> 00:03:37,396
Okay, mocktail number one.

90
00:03:37,639 --> 00:03:40,272
This one has cold brew
coffee, a little maple syrup,

91
00:03:40,297 --> 00:03:41,918
vanilla bean and grated cinnamon.

92
00:03:41,943 --> 00:03:45,110
- That sounds great.
- Oh, wait, wait.

93
00:03:46,024 --> 00:03:48,314
Oh, I love that sound.
Remember whip-its?

94
00:03:49,522 --> 00:03:52,571
Neither do I... They
kill a lot of brain cells.

95
00:03:54,829 --> 00:03:57,129
Bonnie, this is terrific.

96
00:04:00,479 --> 00:04:01,979
I like it.

97
00:04:03,408 --> 00:04:05,608
Okay, that's a thumbs
up on Sunday Funday.

98
00:04:05,633 --> 00:04:06,866
Mm-hmm.

99
00:04:06,891 --> 00:04:10,837
- Next we have the Sparkly Pony.
- Ooh!

100
00:04:10,939 --> 00:04:11,939
Smells a little weird.

101
00:04:12,117 --> 00:04:13,216
Awfully picky for someone

102
00:04:13,241 --> 00:04:15,274
who used to drink toilet wine.

103
00:04:15,455 --> 00:04:17,354
Please note the edible
glitter on the rim.

104
00:04:17,379 --> 00:04:18,611
Hmm.

105
00:04:18,789 --> 00:04:19,789
Mmm!

106
00:04:19,814 --> 00:04:21,180
I love it.

107
00:04:21,205 --> 00:04:24,060
So do I, but I'm much
too manly to admit it.

108
00:04:24,085 --> 00:04:25,785
Yeah, you are.

109
00:04:25,810 --> 00:04:27,310
You got a little glitter on your lip.

110
00:04:28,934 --> 00:04:30,900
Two for two.

111
00:04:31,505 --> 00:04:35,116
This one... I call the Wishbone.

112
00:04:35,141 --> 00:04:36,788
Taste it before I tell you what's in it,

113
00:04:36,813 --> 00:04:39,342
but I'm pretty sure
this is the home run.

114
00:04:41,823 --> 00:04:44,948
- What the hell?
- That is nasty!

115
00:04:44,973 --> 00:04:46,906
Maybe I put in too much turkey broth.

116
00:04:46,931 --> 00:04:49,219
- What?!
- It's a riff on Thanksgiving.

117
00:04:49,244 --> 00:04:52,188
There's broth, cranberry juice,
sage and muddled pumpkin.

118
00:04:52,213 --> 00:04:53,653
I think you've got a muddled pumpkin.

119
00:04:53,678 --> 00:04:55,892
If you don't fly close to the sun,

120
00:04:55,924 --> 00:04:57,424
you'll never get there.

121
00:04:57,518 --> 00:04:59,140
Well, you're two-thirds
of a whacked-out genius,

122
00:04:59,165 --> 00:05:00,397
'cause those are great.

123
00:05:00,422 --> 00:05:02,576
Seriously, keep going and
we'll have a whole menu.

124
00:05:02,601 --> 00:05:05,375
- You mean it?
- Yeah, just nothing else meat-based.

125
00:05:05,400 --> 00:05:07,404
Aw, so that's a no on the bacon gimlet.

126
00:05:07,860 --> 00:05:10,263
- Actually, I'd like to try that.
- It's called the Piglet.

127
00:05:10,288 --> 00:05:11,992
Make it right now.

128
00:05:13,813 --> 00:05:15,145
This is nice.

129
00:05:15,170 --> 00:05:17,180
We never have lunch, just the two of us.

130
00:05:17,205 --> 00:05:18,461
It is nice.

131
00:05:18,486 --> 00:05:21,741
- I have a problem.
- I had a feeling.

132
00:05:21,766 --> 00:05:23,219
You know how sometimes
you think you shouldn't

133
00:05:23,244 --> 00:05:24,388
do something, but the universe is

134
00:05:24,412 --> 00:05:25,878
telling you that you should?

135
00:05:25,903 --> 00:05:28,091
Isn't it smarter just to
listen to the universe?

136
00:05:28,907 --> 00:05:31,017
How about you listen
to what's in your heart?

137
00:05:31,196 --> 00:05:32,662
Yeah, well, my heart says it wants me

138
00:05:32,687 --> 00:05:34,649
to go out with Bonnie's therapist.

139
00:05:35,164 --> 00:05:37,523
Your heart is out of its mind.

140
00:05:38,024 --> 00:05:39,803
Didn't Bonnie make it very clear

141
00:05:39,828 --> 00:05:41,894
that she's not comfortable with that?

142
00:05:41,919 --> 00:05:44,749
Yeah, but I ran into him at
my juice place the other day,

143
00:05:44,774 --> 00:05:47,233
and he was sweaty and kind of goofy,

144
00:05:47,258 --> 00:05:50,180
but for some reason, I can't
stop thinking about him.

145
00:05:50,633 --> 00:05:53,426
I had a BLT yesterday I
can't stop thinking about.

146
00:05:53,451 --> 00:05:55,118
Doesn't mean I should date it.

147
00:05:55,143 --> 00:05:56,976
Taylor, what do you think?

148
00:05:57,001 --> 00:05:58,981
I think Bonnie needs a therapist
more than you need a man.

149
00:05:59,006 --> 00:06:01,006
Now would you two order already?

150
00:06:03,084 --> 00:06:05,774
Bonnie Plunkett is ruining my life.

151
00:06:06,985 --> 00:06:08,465
How so this week?

152
00:06:08,490 --> 00:06:11,235
Keeping in mind that our
session is only 90 minutes.

153
00:06:11,883 --> 00:06:14,147
The planets have aligned for me

154
00:06:14,172 --> 00:06:16,172
in a way they never have before.

155
00:06:16,197 --> 00:06:19,019
A lovely, sophisticated,
kind, generous woman

156
00:06:19,044 --> 00:06:21,778
has taken a liking to
me, but I can't pursue it

157
00:06:21,803 --> 00:06:23,436
because she's Bonnie's friend.

158
00:06:23,766 --> 00:06:25,748
It's a clear ethical violation.

159
00:06:26,139 --> 00:06:28,094
But she's so hot!

160
00:06:28,896 --> 00:06:30,295
You didn't mention "hot."

161
00:06:30,899 --> 00:06:32,179
But no.

162
00:06:32,724 --> 00:06:35,358
But no one like her has ever
been attracted to me before.

163
00:06:35,828 --> 00:06:37,650
She was definitely head cheerleader.

164
00:06:38,039 --> 00:06:40,140
My only friend was
a gifted ten-year-old

165
00:06:40,165 --> 00:06:42,383
taking a bunch of AP classes.

166
00:06:43,250 --> 00:06:46,425
- You're angry.
- He was my only friend.

167
00:06:46,821 --> 00:06:48,797
I wasn't his.

168
00:06:49,341 --> 00:06:52,308
I mean because you feel
like you don't have choices.

169
00:06:52,333 --> 00:06:55,141
- I don't.
- But you do.

170
00:06:56,414 --> 00:06:59,593
You could choose to take
this as a positive affirmation

171
00:06:59,618 --> 00:07:03,141
of your appeal to the
fairer sex and move on.

172
00:07:03,437 --> 00:07:05,427
Or you can choose the cheerleader,

173
00:07:05,547 --> 00:07:08,080
quit your job and blow your life up.

174
00:07:08,182 --> 00:07:09,949
You know I'm not gonna do that.

175
00:07:11,185 --> 00:07:12,551
And why is that?

176
00:07:13,117 --> 00:07:15,203
Because I really care about my work

177
00:07:15,228 --> 00:07:17,562
and the people that I treat.

178
00:07:18,860 --> 00:07:20,670
Including Bonnie Plunkett.

179
00:07:20,695 --> 00:07:23,524
Which is why you're choosing
not to date her friend.

180
00:07:24,000 --> 00:07:25,485
As long as Bonnie's your patient,

181
00:07:25,510 --> 00:07:27,043
it's completely off the table.

182
00:07:27,068 --> 00:07:29,068
She's gonna be my patient forever.

183
00:07:29,399 --> 00:07:30,819
We all have one of those.

184
00:07:33,409 --> 00:07:34,808
Hey!

185
00:07:37,024 --> 00:07:39,422
Adam put the new drinks
on the menu right away.

186
00:07:39,447 --> 00:07:41,914
And people love them. They're a hit.

187
00:07:42,000 --> 00:07:44,460
And that makes me feel like
people love me and I'm a hit.

188
00:07:44,485 --> 00:07:46,319
And you know who I
have to thank for that?

189
00:07:46,576 --> 00:07:47,708
Me.

190
00:07:49,724 --> 00:07:53,358
I'm the one who said I need
to find a new purpose in life.

191
00:07:53,383 --> 00:07:55,538
God, I felt so stuck

192
00:07:55,563 --> 00:07:57,997
when I first came here,
and now I'm so productive.

193
00:07:58,176 --> 00:07:59,709
I'm so happy for you, Bonnie.

194
00:07:59,930 --> 00:08:01,834
Well, hang onto your happiness hat,

195
00:08:01,859 --> 00:08:04,086
'cause you may be out $35 a week.

196
00:08:04,211 --> 00:08:07,006
- What?
- I don't think I need therapy anymore.

197
00:08:08,391 --> 00:08:09,953
Go on.

198
00:08:10,445 --> 00:08:12,678
I'm serious... I just
needed a little confidence.

199
00:08:12,703 --> 00:08:14,436
And now there's nothing stopping me.

200
00:08:14,694 --> 00:08:17,327
I can feel in my bones
my career is on the way.

201
00:08:17,352 --> 00:08:19,739
And I'm gonna grab it
and have a meteoric rise.

202
00:08:19,764 --> 00:08:21,731
And, you know, Adam is
gonna be so proud of me

203
00:08:21,756 --> 00:08:23,189
when they're bottling my mocktails

204
00:08:23,214 --> 00:08:24,767
and selling them in supermarkets.

205
00:08:24,792 --> 00:08:27,047
Until he starts resenting
me for outshining him,

206
00:08:27,072 --> 00:08:28,938
which is ridiculous
because I've done nothing

207
00:08:28,963 --> 00:08:30,396
but show up for him and his bar,

208
00:08:30,421 --> 00:08:32,976
but now that I make more money
than he does, I'm the enemy?

209
00:08:33,001 --> 00:08:35,401
Because I'll just be reminding
him of his personal failures.

210
00:08:35,426 --> 00:08:37,280
And he won't be able to
take it, so he'll leave.

211
00:08:37,305 --> 00:08:39,125
And without him, I'm lost and alone

212
00:08:39,150 --> 00:08:41,050
and I'll never be happy again.

213
00:08:41,075 --> 00:08:43,142
I think I need to come twice a week.

214
00:08:45,190 --> 00:08:46,723
How's Thursday?

215
00:08:46,748 --> 00:08:48,650
Can't do Thursday.

216
00:09:01,253 --> 00:09:03,229
Spinach, cucumber, cayenne pepper.

217
00:09:03,254 --> 00:09:04,869
And, no, I did not just have one.

218
00:09:04,894 --> 00:09:07,924
- Jill.
- What?

219
00:09:09,690 --> 00:09:12,649
Twice in one week.
What are the odds?

220
00:09:12,674 --> 00:09:15,485
I minored in statistics...
They're very low.

221
00:09:15,510 --> 00:09:17,844
Ah, well, we got to stop bumping
into each other like this.

222
00:09:17,869 --> 00:09:20,524
We really do. Goodbye.

223
00:09:20,549 --> 00:09:22,315
Wait, you just got here.

224
00:09:23,150 --> 00:09:25,695
I left my wallet at home.

225
00:09:25,720 --> 00:09:26,920
Well, I can spot you.

226
00:09:27,099 --> 00:09:28,131
Oh, no, no.

227
00:09:28,156 --> 00:09:29,567
They barely respect me here as it is.

228
00:09:29,591 --> 00:09:32,392
If a woman pays for my
lady boost, I'm finished.

229
00:09:32,861 --> 00:09:34,527
Goodbye.

230
00:09:37,059 --> 00:09:39,158
This is a fire code violation.

231
00:09:40,722 --> 00:09:42,604
Isn't he so hot?

232
00:09:46,282 --> 00:09:48,683
You look great... why
are you so dressed up?

233
00:09:48,855 --> 00:09:51,922
I was told to expect a
Sex and the City vibe.

234
00:09:52,064 --> 00:09:54,998
You know, it's still just a
bar with barrels for tables.

235
00:09:56,801 --> 00:09:57,833
Look at us.

236
00:09:57,858 --> 00:09:59,591
Out at a bar, martini glasses in hand,

237
00:09:59,616 --> 00:10:01,565
but we're not drinking, so
we won't wake up tomorrow

238
00:10:01,590 --> 00:10:03,256
with soul-crushing regret

239
00:10:03,281 --> 00:10:04,947
or our mug shots on the news.

240
00:10:05,126 --> 00:10:06,626
Who needs another round?

241
00:10:06,651 --> 00:10:07,650
I do.

242
00:10:07,675 --> 00:10:09,119
I don't have five hands.
Tammy, help me out.

243
00:10:09,144 --> 00:10:11,354
Mm, sure, I love
waitressing on my night off.

244
00:10:12,511 --> 00:10:14,077
I'm gonna hit the ladies' room.

245
00:10:14,102 --> 00:10:16,903
This little piglet has to go
"wee, wee, wee."

246
00:10:17,510 --> 00:10:19,083
You know, like the toe thing for kids.

247
00:10:19,107 --> 00:10:21,174
We got it, sweetheart.

248
00:10:23,650 --> 00:10:26,022
Hey. Real quick, while
Bonnie's not here,

249
00:10:26,124 --> 00:10:29,159
um, I ran into Trevor again,
accidentally on purpose.

250
00:10:29,261 --> 00:10:30,660
Well, which one was it?

251
00:10:30,685 --> 00:10:32,986
Accidentally for him, on purpose for me.

252
00:10:34,756 --> 00:10:36,789
Oh, save the judgy face.

253
00:10:36,968 --> 00:10:38,134
He blew me off.

254
00:10:38,159 --> 00:10:39,459
Oh, regardless, Jill.

255
00:10:39,484 --> 00:10:41,128
You're just trying to
see how close you can get

256
00:10:41,153 --> 00:10:43,387
to doing something wrong
without doing something wrong.

257
00:10:43,412 --> 00:10:44,711
And you know what I call that?

258
00:10:44,810 --> 00:10:46,619
Doing something wrong.

259
00:10:48,036 --> 00:10:49,146
Adam says these are on the house,

260
00:10:49,170 --> 00:10:50,481
but I disagree, so you can give me

261
00:10:50,505 --> 00:10:51,838
your money directly.

262
00:10:52,017 --> 00:10:53,850
Why is everything always about you?

263
00:10:53,875 --> 00:10:54,941
What's your problem?

264
00:10:55,043 --> 00:10:56,587
I finally found a guy I want to be with,

265
00:10:56,611 --> 00:10:57,658
and you won't let me.

266
00:10:57,683 --> 00:10:58,843
Well, unless it's my husband,

267
00:10:58,868 --> 00:10:59,978
I don't know what you're talking about.

268
00:11:00,003 --> 00:11:01,314
I don't want your husband.

269
00:11:01,560 --> 00:11:03,159
I want your therapist.

270
00:11:03,261 --> 00:11:05,061
Oh. You sure you don't want Adam?

271
00:11:05,086 --> 00:11:06,386
I mean, no offense to Trevor.

272
00:11:06,411 --> 00:11:09,111
He's cute in a "won't you
be my neighbor" kind of way.

273
00:11:09,136 --> 00:11:10,279
If you want to go out with Trevor,

274
00:11:10,304 --> 00:11:11,203
go out with him.

275
00:11:11,373 --> 00:11:12,806
But you said he's off-limits.

276
00:11:12,831 --> 00:11:14,642
Yeah, but that was before
I knew you were doodling,

277
00:11:14,667 --> 00:11:16,100
"Mrs. Jill...

278
00:11:16,442 --> 00:11:18,642
whatever-his-last-name-is"
in your notebook.

279
00:11:18,667 --> 00:11:20,733
You don't know your
therapist's last name?

280
00:11:20,758 --> 00:11:22,558
I barely know your last name.

281
00:11:22,814 --> 00:11:24,714
The point is, if you don't like

282
00:11:24,739 --> 00:11:26,873
where I stand on something,
ask me again the next day.

283
00:11:26,898 --> 00:11:28,809
Thanks to menopause, I
will have either forgotten

284
00:11:28,834 --> 00:11:30,067
or changed my mind.

285
00:11:30,846 --> 00:11:31,988
You mean it?

286
00:11:32,013 --> 00:11:33,613
Of course I do. You're my friend.

287
00:11:33,638 --> 00:11:34,971
I want what's best for you.

288
00:11:35,446 --> 00:11:38,354
- That's very generous of you.
- It is.

289
00:11:38,854 --> 00:11:41,598
BT dubs, everybody at
this table owes me $8.50,

290
00:11:41,623 --> 00:11:43,189
and I haven't heard my Venmo ding.

291
00:11:47,495 --> 00:11:48,561
You were right.

292
00:11:48,740 --> 00:11:50,830
I don't like to read.

293
00:11:53,435 --> 00:11:54,734
- Hey, babe.
- Hey.

294
00:11:55,096 --> 00:11:57,247
You and the ladies seemed
to have fun tonight.

295
00:11:57,272 --> 00:11:59,860
By the way, were you
the one who left a note

296
00:11:59,885 --> 00:12:01,918
in the tip jar that
said, "Comb your hair"?

297
00:12:02,020 --> 00:12:03,653
What? No.

298
00:12:03,678 --> 00:12:05,478
But now that a complete
stranger said it,

299
00:12:05,503 --> 00:12:07,236
why not give it a try?

300
00:12:07,697 --> 00:12:09,726
Anyway, it was cool
having you guys there.

301
00:12:09,751 --> 00:12:11,551
Yeah, we might make
"not-drinking" at your bar

302
00:12:11,576 --> 00:12:12,862
a regular Tuesday thing.

303
00:12:12,887 --> 00:12:14,253
I love it when you're happy.

304
00:12:14,278 --> 00:12:16,400
- I am.
- Mwah.

305
00:12:16,541 --> 00:12:18,441
- Although...
- Oh, boy.

306
00:12:19,594 --> 00:12:22,182
Jill said something to
me that didn't bother me

307
00:12:22,207 --> 00:12:25,008
at the time, but I'm starting
to realize it enrages me.

308
00:12:25,033 --> 00:12:26,632
She wants to date Trevor.

309
00:12:27,712 --> 00:12:29,549
- That's weird.
- Right?

310
00:12:29,574 --> 00:12:31,182
My best friend and my
therapist are gonna be

311
00:12:31,206 --> 00:12:32,638
talking about me during sex.

312
00:12:32,804 --> 00:12:34,684
You really think that's gonna happen?

313
00:12:34,709 --> 00:12:36,676
I talk about me during
sex. Why wouldn't they?

314
00:12:36,855 --> 00:12:39,055
Aren't you jumping the gun a little bit?

315
00:12:39,080 --> 00:12:40,618
They haven't even gone on a date yet.

316
00:12:40,643 --> 00:12:42,258
Well, things don't
have to actually happen

317
00:12:42,283 --> 00:12:43,983
for me to be upset about them.

318
00:12:44,008 --> 00:12:46,173
That's why I stopped
telling you about my dreams.

319
00:12:46,198 --> 00:12:47,797
Why don't you call Jill

320
00:12:47,822 --> 00:12:49,342
and find a way to work it out together?

321
00:12:49,752 --> 00:12:51,234
That sounds rational.

322
00:12:51,259 --> 00:12:53,226
Probably why it feels wrong.

323
00:12:53,251 --> 00:12:55,111
- Can we be done?
- Sure.

324
00:12:55,136 --> 00:12:56,639
But seriously...

325
00:12:56,664 --> 00:12:58,664
put a comb through your
hair every once in a while.

326
00:13:31,050 --> 00:13:32,268
Oh, no.

327
00:13:33,104 --> 00:13:35,635
Now I'm "not-drinking" alone.

328
00:13:43,133 --> 00:13:45,934
Hey, do you know if he's in
there with a patient right now?

329
00:13:47,515 --> 00:13:49,215
Sorry.

330
00:13:49,240 --> 00:13:51,783
You look like that neighbor
who knows what's going on.

331
00:13:52,090 --> 00:13:55,358
He has appointments at
11:00, 1:00 and 4:00.

332
00:13:55,523 --> 00:13:57,523
Thank you.

333
00:14:02,630 --> 00:14:03,897
Jill.

334
00:14:03,922 --> 00:14:05,888
This is a... What are you... What...

335
00:14:07,403 --> 00:14:09,102
Hi.

336
00:14:10,248 --> 00:14:12,638
Um, you didn't come by the
juice place this morning,

337
00:14:12,663 --> 00:14:15,731
so I... I brought you a kale
smoothie with a lady boost.

338
00:14:15,756 --> 00:14:17,589
Wow.

339
00:14:19,914 --> 00:14:22,215
I have a folic acid deficiency.

340
00:14:24,608 --> 00:14:26,513
Well, this is a very thoughtful gesture.

341
00:14:26,538 --> 00:14:28,762
Mmm!

342
00:14:28,787 --> 00:14:30,031
Whoa, a lot of ginger.

343
00:14:30,056 --> 00:14:31,385
Ah.

344
00:14:31,426 --> 00:14:33,659
Okay, confession time.

345
00:14:34,602 --> 00:14:35,602
I like you.

346
00:14:35,828 --> 00:14:37,128
Whew.

347
00:14:37,332 --> 00:14:39,365
I've never been the first
one to say that before.

348
00:14:39,467 --> 00:14:41,267
Congratulations.

349
00:14:41,842 --> 00:14:44,737
I'm flattered.

350
00:14:44,839 --> 00:14:46,305
Red-hot flattered.

351
00:14:47,542 --> 00:14:48,741
But...

352
00:14:49,256 --> 00:14:53,079
- I cannot like you back.
- "Cannot" or "do not"?

353
00:14:53,104 --> 00:14:54,624
Because I talked to Bonnie,

354
00:14:54,649 --> 00:14:56,115
she gave us a big ole green light.

355
00:14:56,482 --> 00:14:57,760
Yay for Bonnie.

356
00:14:58,876 --> 00:15:02,778
But I still can't be interested.

357
00:15:02,803 --> 00:15:04,975
See, now, that was a
weird way to say that.

358
00:15:06,071 --> 00:15:08,205
Your 1:00 will be here soon.

359
00:15:08,713 --> 00:15:10,482
I know what time it is.

360
00:15:11,633 --> 00:15:13,166
Actually, she's right, come on.

361
00:15:14,679 --> 00:15:16,279
Oh, boy.

362
00:15:16,304 --> 00:15:18,538
Be strong.

363
00:15:19,808 --> 00:15:21,541
Why can't you be interested in me?

364
00:15:21,853 --> 00:15:24,554
Because your friend is my patient,

365
00:15:24,579 --> 00:15:26,112
and that would be unethical.

366
00:15:26,214 --> 00:15:29,348
Well, is there a scenario
where we just don't tell anybody

367
00:15:29,373 --> 00:15:31,131
and it makes it that much hotter?

368
00:15:31,486 --> 00:15:34,120
Oh, how I've pondered
that very question.

369
00:15:34,222 --> 00:15:37,390
Mm. Unfortunately, all roads lead to no.

370
00:15:37,492 --> 00:15:39,559
So you're saying you've pondered me?

371
00:15:39,739 --> 00:15:41,553
My ego wants to believe

372
00:15:41,578 --> 00:15:43,678
that you find me irresistible.

373
00:15:44,209 --> 00:15:45,441
But...

374
00:15:45,543 --> 00:15:47,377
my shrink-y sense tells me

375
00:15:47,402 --> 00:15:50,002
that there's almost definitely
something else going on here.

376
00:15:50,103 --> 00:15:52,248
Yeah, what's going on is I'm
used to getting what I want,

377
00:15:52,273 --> 00:15:53,806
and I don't know what's happening.

378
00:15:53,908 --> 00:15:56,108
Interesting, and this is a situation

379
00:15:56,210 --> 00:15:57,922
where you've been told you
can't have what you want.

380
00:15:57,946 --> 00:15:59,679
First by Bonnie and then by me.

381
00:15:59,704 --> 00:16:00,970
So... ?

382
00:16:00,995 --> 00:16:03,282
So everyone has moments
where they want something

383
00:16:03,307 --> 00:16:04,605
that they can't have.

384
00:16:06,551 --> 00:16:08,120
Everyone.

385
00:16:08,145 --> 00:16:11,013
The question is, why?

386
00:16:12,111 --> 00:16:14,244
How do you characterize
your relationships with men?

387
00:16:14,996 --> 00:16:17,621
- Well, they start out great...
- Mm-hmm.

388
00:16:17,988 --> 00:16:20,266
And usually end in disaster.

389
00:16:20,367 --> 00:16:22,011
That could stem from a
fractured relationship

390
00:16:22,036 --> 00:16:23,102
with a parent.

391
00:16:23,127 --> 00:16:25,261
How are things with you and your father?

392
00:16:25,604 --> 00:16:27,036
Not good.

393
00:16:28,409 --> 00:16:29,573
Tell me more.

394
00:16:30,285 --> 00:16:32,011
Oh, it's not much to tell.

395
00:16:32,036 --> 00:16:33,823
Just your basic "Mom kills herself,

396
00:16:33,848 --> 00:16:36,582
Dad wants nothing to do
with you anymore" situation.

397
00:16:38,287 --> 00:16:41,753
Jill, that sounds incredibly painful.

398
00:16:43,531 --> 00:16:44,930
It is.

399
00:16:47,516 --> 00:16:49,551
So what do you think, dinner?

400
00:16:50,398 --> 00:16:53,299
I think your feelings
have my face on them,

401
00:16:53,566 --> 00:16:56,435
but they have nothing to do with me.

402
00:16:57,138 --> 00:16:59,754
How are you doing this so quickly?

403
00:16:59,779 --> 00:17:01,874
I would slow it down
if you were paying me.

404
00:17:05,336 --> 00:17:08,170
Well, if we can't date, then...

405
00:17:09,584 --> 00:17:10,883
can you be my therapist?

406
00:17:10,985 --> 00:17:12,818
Not as long as I'm treating Bonnie.

407
00:17:12,843 --> 00:17:14,430
God, why do you guys have so many rules?

408
00:17:14,455 --> 00:17:15,775
It's not like you're real doctors.

409
00:17:16,751 --> 00:17:19,818
I'm gonna tell myself that has
nothing to do with me, either.

410
00:17:22,107 --> 00:17:23,673
Hey, sorry I'm late.

411
00:17:23,775 --> 00:17:26,209
Have you just left my therapist's bed?

412
00:17:26,234 --> 00:17:28,919
Did you talk about me during the deed?

413
00:17:29,269 --> 00:17:30,735
No.

414
00:17:30,760 --> 00:17:32,582
Trevor and I will not be getting married

415
00:17:32,607 --> 00:17:35,241
and having adorable,
emotionally attuned babies.

416
00:17:35,266 --> 00:17:36,432
What happened?

417
00:17:36,935 --> 00:17:38,287
Well, long story short,

418
00:17:38,312 --> 00:17:40,246
he chose his relationship
with you over me.

419
00:17:40,271 --> 00:17:41,770
He did?

420
00:17:41,795 --> 00:17:43,228
Wow.

421
00:17:43,419 --> 00:17:45,862
I have to admit, I'm a little relieved.

422
00:17:46,404 --> 00:17:48,187
I thought you were okay with it.

423
00:17:48,212 --> 00:17:50,346
Well, who knows with me?
I'm all over the place.

424
00:17:50,896 --> 00:17:53,755
Poor Adam. No, he deserves it.

425
00:17:54,411 --> 00:17:56,973
Why don't we order some
mocktails and talk about

426
00:17:56,998 --> 00:17:59,331
all the many ways life
finds to disappoint us.

427
00:17:59,356 --> 00:18:01,110
Here's one: mocktails.

428
00:18:01,135 --> 00:18:02,535
They're starting to scare me.

429
00:18:03,099 --> 00:18:04,355
What do you mean?

430
00:18:04,380 --> 00:18:05,581
Back when I was drinking,

431
00:18:05,606 --> 00:18:07,807
sometimes just knowing I
was about to have a drink

432
00:18:07,832 --> 00:18:10,366
gave me as much relief
as actually having one.

433
00:18:10,468 --> 00:18:12,001
Mm. I get that.

434
00:18:12,419 --> 00:18:14,190
Just putting a bottle of Dom on ice

435
00:18:14,215 --> 00:18:16,148
used to make me feel all safe and warm.

436
00:18:16,515 --> 00:18:18,515
We drank so differently.

437
00:18:20,240 --> 00:18:23,621
But, yeah, last night I was
making a mocktail at home,

438
00:18:23,646 --> 00:18:26,235
and I got the sense like
the cavalry was coming.

439
00:18:26,260 --> 00:18:27,493
It felt so good.

440
00:18:27,518 --> 00:18:29,518
And that felt dangerous.

441
00:18:31,544 --> 00:18:32,542
How lame am I?

442
00:18:32,567 --> 00:18:34,747
I can't even handle pretend drinking.

443
00:18:35,623 --> 00:18:37,847
Oh, honey, you got to
do whatever you got to do

444
00:18:37,872 --> 00:18:39,305
to protect your sobriety.

445
00:18:39,484 --> 00:18:41,651
You know, if something
brings you closer to a drink,

446
00:18:41,676 --> 00:18:44,201
whatever that is, you shouldn't do it.

447
00:18:44,489 --> 00:18:47,990
It's why I can't eat
olives or go to Dollywood.

448
00:18:48,015 --> 00:18:49,315
That's a shame.

449
00:18:49,340 --> 00:18:51,173
Dolly Parton is a national treasure.

450
00:18:51,198 --> 00:18:52,729
- Mm-hmm.
- Hey, Arlo.

451
00:18:52,754 --> 00:18:54,520
Hey, Bonnie. Can I
get you guys something?

452
00:18:54,699 --> 00:18:57,033
Club soda, no ice, no lime, no nothing.

453
00:18:57,206 --> 00:18:59,940
And I will have a Sparkly Pony, please.

454
00:19:04,009 --> 00:19:06,176
What? It doesn't bring
me closer to a drink.

455
00:19:08,834 --> 00:19:10,558
So, it turns out the list of things

456
00:19:10,583 --> 00:19:12,740
I can't drink continues to get longer.

457
00:19:13,107 --> 00:19:14,693
Can't have cocktails.

458
00:19:14,718 --> 00:19:15,904
Can't have mocktails.

459
00:19:15,929 --> 00:19:16,995
Can't have milk.

460
00:19:17,311 --> 00:19:18,888
I mean, I can, but it becomes unpleasant

461
00:19:18,913 --> 00:19:20,780
for the people around me.

462
00:19:20,865 --> 00:19:22,465
I am impressed.

463
00:19:22,568 --> 00:19:24,713
You saw what was happening and
you did what you needed to do

464
00:19:24,737 --> 00:19:26,136
to take care of yourself.

465
00:19:26,161 --> 00:19:28,472
- You were in your own corner.
- I was.

466
00:19:28,497 --> 00:19:30,050
And you know who I saw there?

467
00:19:30,075 --> 00:19:31,575
A guy named Trevor...

468
00:19:32,660 --> 00:19:34,526
Wells? Really?

469
00:19:35,914 --> 00:19:38,915
Huh, people at Ellis
Island clearly got bored.

470
00:19:39,323 --> 00:19:41,956
Really, Plunkett, you want to go there?

471
00:19:43,689 --> 00:19:45,389
Well, anyway, thank you.

472
00:19:45,414 --> 00:19:47,638
You could have chosen
Jill, but you chose me.

473
00:19:47,926 --> 00:19:51,238
My job is to take care of you,
and I take that very seriously.

474
00:19:51,263 --> 00:19:53,864
I know, but there were a
lot of people in my life

475
00:19:53,889 --> 00:19:56,489
who had that job and most
of them pooped the futon.

476
00:19:56,745 --> 00:19:57,982
But you were there for me,

477
00:19:58,007 --> 00:19:59,740
and my respect for you is up to here.

478
00:20:00,005 --> 00:20:01,738
And for what it's worth,

479
00:20:02,279 --> 00:20:03,707
Jill would've been lucky to have you.

480
00:20:03,732 --> 00:20:06,109
- You're a catch.
- Thank you.

481
00:20:06,578 --> 00:20:09,185
And did you say futon because
you know I sleep on one?

482
00:20:10,159 --> 00:20:12,860
This just in. Now you're here.

483
00:20:12,885 --> 00:20:17,885
- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -
-- for www.addic7ed.com --