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Mum? I need Mum!
I can help. I can help.
Dads are more than capable.
It's my boob.
Oh, um, Mum's on the couch downstairs.
Sh-sh-sh-sh. It's OK.
- Mum. Mum. Mum. - What? What's happening?
My right boob is red and huge and hard.
Oh!
Can you check it?
- Arggh! Is there a lump? - Yeah, it feels very hard.
- Check properly. - Mm, it's like a rock.
And I feel like I've got the flu
but also like my boobs are gonna explode.
Yeah, I think you've probably got mastitis.
- We'll have to go to emergency. - What?!
- Yeah. - Everyone relax!
Relax. Dad's got this.
- Got what? - Oh, um, I've got the baby.
Jacinda. She's settling. Go.
Great. Come on, darlin'.
Oh, my God, it's getting worse!
What is happening?!
It'll be fine. We're a team.
Chalmers-Davis has got this!
Are you sleeping?
Yes.
Ange told me what happened, you poor thing.
I read that you have to keep breastfeeding
through blood and pus.
Yep.
Yay for all.
Well, luckily, Dr Google and I
have come up with the perfect remedy.
You chill the leaves and then you put them on your boobs.
For pain relief.
I have medication for that.
But this could work as a dual treatment.
Or it could give me a rash
like that ashwagandha cream you gave me.
That was meant to be good for stress.
That rash was very stressful.
- I'm only trying to help. - I know.
But right now, all I need is my bath.
And some silence.
I'll wait outside, then.
- Where are you going? - To Oly's.
- To see Sorpresa. - Whatever.
Where the hell do you think you're going, Santiago?
You have to take the little ones to the park today.
I don't have the time right now. I'll do it later.
"I'll do it later." I love it.
You will do later and I will go to work later.
And with your help and all those fucking hippies
asking me for bamboo forks and biodegradable napkins,
we're just gonna let the business go under.
- Mm-hm. - _
Go with the children of the world.
She's my baby. Mine and Oly's.
_
- _ - Rosa. Rosa. Rosa.
What do you know about this Oly girl?
_
Her name is Oly and I believe she's Spanish-impaired.
Probably.
Look, look, I know Santi...
_
Good luck to her, because this is what she's getting. This.
_
Look, I'm just saying...
_
Maybe I'll invite her to Mary's birthday tonight.
There's a party?
Yeah. I didn't tell you?
Hey, well done last night.
We really pulled it together nicely.
Yeah, we're amazing.
Ange, I really want this to work.
Why?
Because...
Lawyers will fleece us of all our money.
We'll have to find a second home in Sydney.
Who the fuck can afford that?
Wow, that's romantic.
You know Jonno,
he's been sleeping in his sister's attic since his divorce
and he's now got a prolapsed disc.
I'm on a couch. I'm halfway there.
- Come back to bed, then. - We're miserable!
- I'm not miserable. - Yes, you are!
You're sleeping with him, aren't you?
That sleazy, salsa-dancing pussy.
- Oh, wow. I'm going to work. - Listen...
Do you really hate me enough to separate?
Dom, come on!
Oly needs us.
Now more than ever.
I mean, last night proved that.
She needs both of us.
Ange, we've had our heads so far up our own arses
we didn't even know our daughter was pregnant.
I don't want us to break her heart.
Hm!
The serves just keep getting bigger.
- Yeah. - Swoon!
Is that spicy? I love me some spice.
Never mind.
You OK? You look tired.
I'm a bit sick.
What's up?
Just... normal stuff.
Not really worth discussing.
I'm on antibiotics.
Still feels like my boobs are broken.
Right. Maybe I could take Sorpresa for a walk.
So you can... rest your boobs.
- Can I see her? - Oh, yeah.
Puchita.
Hello.
There you go.
Hey, you're still cool with me helping out, right?
Of course. It's what we agreed.
Ready to hit the town, kiddo?
So, Mum said I should use my suspension
to practise mindfulness.
And how's that working for you?
I tried it. And it's sick.
- If you say so. - You should try it.
It'd make you more present as a parent.
Uh-huh.
Oly's gonna need a bit of comforting.
Shut up.
As if you're not excited she's single.
Don't really care, to be honest.
Hi, Rosa.
- You're here! - Just.
You want to go to the markets after?
Don't answer it. Scammers.
Hello?
Oh. Hi, Rosa.
_
I'm good, thanks.
_
- Tonight. - _
Oh, a party.
- _ - Oh, that is such a beautiful thought.
The thing is, is that when I said that I'm good, thanks,
I actually meant that I'm a bit unwell.
- _ - I just didn't sleep very well.
But I am on antibiotics. I actually am technically sick.
Could we do another night?
- _ - Um...
OK. Could I let you know after school?
_
OK, thank you. Thanks.
Alright, bye, Rosa. Bye.
What is it?
Just some party she wants me to go to.
You mean that she wants us to go to?
No!
Come on! You're well enough to be at school.
- That's different. - Well, is it?
You know you'll feel better if you go out.
Relax.
Relax the boobs.
Go to a casual party with your friend Reema!
Come on, we haven't gone out together in ages.
Yeah, 'cause I kinda had a baby.
Get your dad to look after it!
Heard you guys got lumped with P&C tonight. Suckers.
Have fun arguing about different shades of beige
for the new library curtains.
Thanks for that.
How's Santi?
Yeah, fine.
How's Dom?
I'm sorry about the way he acted.
I just think he's, um, finally lost it.
Angie, I only asked to be polite.
You don't have to do anything that you don't want to do,
you know that, right?
I mean, you're keeping a human alive.
I know! Thank you.
You're literally the only person who gets it.
- Want me to talk to Rosa? - Can you talk to Reema too?
Bring it on.
No, I'll go for a bit.
I could take care of this one.
Sure.
Thanks for babysitting.
It's not babysitting when she's mine, right?
Hey, maybe we could write up that schedule sometime.
Cool. Yeah.
See ya.
Hello?
_
Moving on to the colour schemes
for the new curtains in the library.
We found that the greyscale
was a little incongruous with the energy of the school.
For those of us that have a predilection for vibrant,
certain hues of beige are more visually stimulating.
Now, there's a huge variety to choose from.
Cosmic Latte, Unbleached Silk,
Desert Sand, Buff.
I mean, there's so much variety
we can even splash out and go two-tone.
I for one am partial to the Cosmic Latte/Buff combination.
Matias, what do you think?
Right.
Oh, my God!
You better get down with me, Oly, I swear to God.
This is gonna be awesome! Just like old times.
Doesn't sound like reggae.
Oh, my God, it's reggaeton. Please don't say that inside.
OK, this is literally nothing like old times.
I see an open bar. Cha-ching!
You said that we were gonna take it easy.
We can have a little drinkie.
Not you. You're on your antibiotics, OK?
- You came! - Hi!
Hi.
- It's Angel, right? - Angel, that's right.
I'm Reema, Oly's bestie.
Let's get a drink.
Please tell me they have watermelon Cruisers.
Oh, I think they've got it.
Ha! Oh, my God, this party.
I'm so thirsty. Get me some wine.
No, no, no, rum. No, some wine. Some wine.
- Wine. - Whoo!
You can tell she's thirsty from a mile away.
Can I please have...
- _ - Thank you.
Baby daddy?
- Oh. - Hi.
Hi.
Oly said I could come help look after Jacinda.
Oh. Righto.
No way!
- Spiderbait. - Put 'em on if you like.
Kram is baller.
You know his name's not really Kram?
- Oh, yeah? - Yeah, it's actually Mark.
Which is 'Kram' backwards, which is 'Mark' backwards.
Oh, that's cool.
Yeah, man.
You know, it's good to have another bloke round here.
Gender balance has been off since Bowie left.
Is that Oly's brother?
- Mm. - Yeah?
The Boz. The B-train.
Yeah.
He's in South America having the time of his life.
Doing whatever he wants with whoever he wants.
He's a free man.
Yeah.
Hey, your dad let you drink beer?
Oh, no, not really.
Pfft! Pretty strict, is he?
Oh, sometimes, yeah.
Yeah. I know his type. Help yourself.
- Actually? - Fo' shizz.
Thanks, man.
You know, anytime you want to get away from that tyrant,
you're welcome over here.
- No short shorts over here. - Huh?
I said, "I'll just turn it up over here."
Oh!
I've always thought that greyscale
was incongruous to the energy of the school.
That's hilarious.
How are things at home?
I'm sleeping on the couch.
Dom thinks you and I are fucking.
Whoo! Hola!
Hey, fuck off! I'm married. Married.
Cool scarf. Love the colour.
- It's not a fashion statement. - What is it, then?
It's a symbol for the fight for abortion rights in Chile.
Ha, awkward.
I mean, not that you knew you were pregnant, but...
The movement's massive.
It's spread through Latin America and the Caribbean.
Yeah, you white-splained that perfectly.
Except it's much broader than that.
Don't worry. Oly's super-woke.
What is she, your ethnic shield?
No, I'm empathetic and capable of connection
even though her people colonised mine.
We're Scottish.
It's easy to be empathetic
if you've turned yourself into a coconut.
I love coconuts.
I need a drink.
I'm a huge follower of 'la marea verde' and the protests.
Are you going to teach your daughter all about it?
- Of course. - Mm.
It's not the same as lived experience,
but I guess a few Google searches give you the right
to pretend that we are fighting for the same thing.
Aren't we fighting for the same thing?
Are we?
Look, I want my baby to know her history
and I'm gonna teach her what I can,
but if I fall short,
then Santi will be there to pick up the slack.
And Bernardita.
And you, if you like.
Santi won't help. He's a total kangaroo.
He's so good in bed, though, right?
- Did you come? - No.
I... Sorry. I... I thought you did.
Not quite.
But you made so much noise.
I was surprised. I...
Oh, right.
Matias...
... you have nothing to be worried about.
That was the best thing that's happened to me in years.
- Goodnight. - Goodnight.
I don't want to go home.
Oh!
Worst bestie ever.
- No, you're not. - No, you!
You just left me there and you knew I was upset.
- The coconut thing? - I was defending you.
And you don't give a shit.
OK, Reema, I'm really fucking tired.
My boobs still feel weird.
Now I have to look after you
when you're the one who made a big deal about hanging out.
You know you can be really selfish sometimes?
I'm not selfish. You're...
Oh!
Oh, Ange! Go away, please. I can't have you see me like this.
I know how much you respect me.
I'll leave you to it.
Oh, God, you scared me.
I thought that might help.
- Where have you been? - A P&C meeting.
- Oh. - I'm gonna get ready for bed.
Oh, you're not gonna help?
Um, well, can't your dad help?
He's been here helping all night, actually.
Oh, well, we had to move tables and chairs around
for the meeting, so...
... I really need a shower.
Hm.
What are you doing?
You're not into this anymore?
Fuck it. I'm not wasting my time.
- Angie... - Mm. Mm.
- Angie... - Mm, yeah?
Do you think...
... that you and I will ever have sex together again?
I...
I don't think so.
You smell really bad.
Mm.
My mouth tastes like arse.
Oh!
Hey!
It's OK. Good morning!
Oh, come here.
Oh, la, la. Oh!
- That's better. - You're really good at that.
You'll have to teach me.
I might pop one out in, like, 15 years.
Sorry.
You wanna hang out after school?
I kind of just want to come straight home with Jacinda.
That's cool.
Maybe we could do something tomorrow.
Maybe.
- I'm sorry I was a dick. - It's OK.
I've just really missed you.
Me too.
- You're here early. - Yeah. So are you.
Are you OK?
I don't know.
I, um...
I don't think we can do that again.
Do you agree?
Yeah. I do.
- Synced and corrected by chamallow - - www.addic7ed.com -