1
00:00:00,133 --> 00:00:02,881
- Previously on Mom...
- So I came home,

2
00:00:02,906 --> 00:00:04,693
marched right into the bathroom,

3
00:00:04,718 --> 00:00:06,486
told Andy I wanted to
deepen our relationship,

4
00:00:06,510 --> 00:00:08,304
and you know what he said?

5
00:00:08,378 --> 00:00:10,882
"Can I finish my shower first?"

6
00:00:11,656 --> 00:00:13,882
When I get home I just want
to take a shower and relax.

7
00:00:13,907 --> 00:00:16,084
I don't want to talk about my feelings.

8
00:00:16,320 --> 00:00:18,420
Especially when I'm not wearing pants.

9
00:00:18,455 --> 00:00:20,288
It's Jill. Safety first.

10
00:00:20,808 --> 00:00:23,071
Andy wants a break from her.

11
00:00:23,809 --> 00:00:25,021
_

12
00:00:25,061 --> 00:00:26,962
- Tammy, alcoholic.
- Hi, Tammy.

13
00:00:27,157 --> 00:00:28,541
Lately I've been looking
for ways to deepen

14
00:00:28,565 --> 00:00:29,831
my spiritual connection,

15
00:00:29,867 --> 00:00:33,268
so, um, I decided to take
a peaceful nature hike.

16
00:00:33,303 --> 00:00:36,571
No phones, no earbuds, not even gum.

17
00:00:36,836 --> 00:00:39,007
And that's when I realized

18
00:00:39,219 --> 00:00:43,417
hell is other people
while also walking uphill.

19
00:00:43,814 --> 00:00:45,325
This couple behind me...
And I feel compelled

20
00:00:45,349 --> 00:00:47,768
to point out that the guy
was wearing leggings...

21
00:00:48,136 --> 00:00:51,319
Anyway, they were going on
and on in great gory detail

22
00:00:51,355 --> 00:00:53,816
about this tick that
had set up shop in his...

23
00:00:53,841 --> 00:00:55,995
well, let's just say his swimsuit area.

24
00:00:57,528 --> 00:01:00,745
She told me this one over breakfast.

25
00:01:00,964 --> 00:01:02,375
I mean, how am I supposed
to achieve inner peace

26
00:01:02,399 --> 00:01:04,496
when I'm listening to them
yakking about hot compresses

27
00:01:04,521 --> 00:01:07,119
and tweezer angles and him
passed out on the kitchen table?

28
00:01:07,144 --> 00:01:08,377
I thought, "You know,

29
00:01:08,412 --> 00:01:09,738
I'll just speed up so I
don't have to hear it."

30
00:01:09,763 --> 00:01:11,214
But then I realized I'd
never know how it turned out,

31
00:01:11,239 --> 00:01:14,050
so I pretended to drink
water to catch the end.

32
00:01:14,075 --> 00:01:15,341
He's fine.

33
00:01:15,636 --> 00:01:18,722
He just needs the leggings
to trust the woods again.

34
00:01:20,232 --> 00:01:22,425
Anyway, I never connected with God,

35
00:01:22,450 --> 00:01:24,878
but I do know what to do in case a tick

36
00:01:24,903 --> 00:01:27,763
ever sets up shop in my hoo-ha.

37
00:01:31,211 --> 00:01:33,346
Someone else, please.

38
00:01:35,096 --> 00:01:37,681
- Jill, alcoholic.
- Hi, Jill.

39
00:01:37,893 --> 00:01:40,360
Well, Andy and I are still on pause.

40
00:01:40,591 --> 00:01:43,682
I guess we have a different definition
of what "pause" means.

41
00:01:46,001 --> 00:01:48,168
See, now, that was a pause.

42
00:01:48,635 --> 00:01:52,172
Oh, she was acting. I didn't
know what was happening.

43
00:01:52,207 --> 00:01:55,062
People, we're at day 16,
and I'm coming unglued.

44
00:01:55,382 --> 00:01:57,210
I'm also regretting the fact
that I let Andy be the one

45
00:01:57,246 --> 00:01:59,734
who gets to say, "Pause over."

46
00:02:00,968 --> 00:02:03,127
I just wish I knew what
was going on in his head.

47
00:02:03,930 --> 00:02:05,992
I mean, he has told me
that sometimes I can be

48
00:02:06,017 --> 00:02:09,445
a bit too much, but... if
loving hard and living large

49
00:02:09,470 --> 00:02:12,203
means I'm too much,
then guilty as charged.

50
00:02:14,181 --> 00:02:17,950
I just feel so helpless...
and as we all know,

51
00:02:17,975 --> 00:02:20,509
that is a dangerous
feeling for an alcoholic.

52
00:02:21,355 --> 00:02:24,314
But I mean, I-I'm not
gonna drink or use over it.

53
00:02:24,927 --> 00:02:27,727
I may have gone on a
bit of a shopping spree.

54
00:02:28,010 --> 00:02:30,791
American Express called
to make sure I was okay.

55
00:02:30,816 --> 00:02:32,682
They're so sweet.

56
00:02:32,707 --> 00:02:34,874
Anyway, thanks.

57
00:02:36,957 --> 00:02:39,853
- Bonnie, alcoholic.
- Hi, Bonnie.

58
00:02:39,888 --> 00:02:41,213
Don't worry, Jill.

59
00:02:41,238 --> 00:02:43,023
Adam and Andy are
watching football tonight,

60
00:02:43,058 --> 00:02:44,702
so I'll find out what's
going on in his head.

61
00:02:44,726 --> 00:02:46,226
I'm sorry, I know that was cross talk,

62
00:02:46,261 --> 00:02:48,528
but she usually sits next to
me and I just whisper to her

63
00:02:48,553 --> 00:02:50,488
while Marjorie drones on.

64
00:02:52,256 --> 00:02:54,152
Marge, bring us home. Big finish.

65
00:03:06,440 --> 00:03:11,440
- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -
-- for www.addic7ed.com --

66
00:03:15,626 --> 00:03:16,925
Whoa.

67
00:03:18,289 --> 00:03:20,028
Whoa. Hey.

68
00:03:20,064 --> 00:03:21,649
Hey.

69
00:03:22,032 --> 00:03:23,565
What are you doing up so late?

70
00:03:23,860 --> 00:03:26,201
Uh, I'm just, uh, watching this movie.

71
00:03:26,236 --> 00:03:28,733
It's an infomercial for Flex Seal.

72
00:03:29,640 --> 00:03:30,839
Well, it's riveting.

73
00:03:30,874 --> 00:03:32,841
They're making a boat out of rags.

74
00:03:32,937 --> 00:03:34,114
Could've used that when I was trying

75
00:03:34,139 --> 00:03:35,772
to get out of the Philippines.

76
00:03:37,614 --> 00:03:40,682
- Well, good night.
- Wait.

77
00:03:40,717 --> 00:03:42,921
- How was your night with Andy?
- Great.

78
00:03:42,946 --> 00:03:44,479
Wait, wait.

79
00:03:44,621 --> 00:03:46,955
He hasn't talked to Jill for 16 days.

80
00:03:46,990 --> 00:03:49,324
- Did he say why?
- It didn't come up.

81
00:03:49,359 --> 00:03:50,592
You were with him all night

82
00:03:50,627 --> 00:03:52,527
- and it didn't come up?
- No.

83
00:03:52,563 --> 00:03:53,840
Then what the hell did you talk about

84
00:03:53,864 --> 00:03:55,530
for five and a half hours?

85
00:03:55,681 --> 00:03:58,433
Oh, the end of the early game,
and then the whole late game.

86
00:03:58,579 --> 00:04:01,187
Which actually had a
successful onside kick.

87
00:04:01,212 --> 00:04:03,538
I mean, you just don't see
it since the rule change.

88
00:04:03,574 --> 00:04:06,708
Really? The only couples friends
we've ever had are in crisis,

89
00:04:06,743 --> 00:04:08,977
and you didn't ask
him anything about it?

90
00:04:09,012 --> 00:04:11,713
- No.
- That is so men.

91
00:04:11,748 --> 00:04:13,748
No feelings allowed.

92
00:04:13,784 --> 00:04:15,650
Oh, no, there were plenty of feelings.

93
00:04:15,686 --> 00:04:18,253
You have to understand,
this onside kick...

94
00:04:18,288 --> 00:04:21,156
If you say the words "on," "side"

95
00:04:21,191 --> 00:04:23,058
or "kick" one more time,

96
00:04:23,093 --> 00:04:24,871
I'm going into the kitchen,
grabbing a can of soup,

97
00:04:24,895 --> 00:04:27,329
and throwing it at you as hard as I can.

98
00:04:28,113 --> 00:04:29,586
Sorry.

99
00:04:30,224 --> 00:04:33,682
Just really changed the ga... Sorry.

100
00:04:34,313 --> 00:04:37,305
Think. Did he say anything at all?

101
00:04:37,341 --> 00:04:39,474
Anything at all that might explain

102
00:04:39,509 --> 00:04:41,009
how he's feeling about Jill

103
00:04:41,044 --> 00:04:43,445
or if anything's changed
in their relationship?

104
00:04:43,480 --> 00:04:44,813
He really didn't, Bonnie.

105
00:04:44,848 --> 00:04:47,289
The man's got a lot
on his plate right now.

106
00:04:47,314 --> 00:04:50,051
He's breaking in a new partner,
he's trying to make sergeant,

107
00:04:50,087 --> 00:04:51,786
he had the Raiders plus three,

108
00:04:51,811 --> 00:04:53,911
which the onside kick completely just...

109
00:04:54,011 --> 00:04:56,689
I'll just go get the can of soup myself.

110
00:05:01,056 --> 00:05:02,197
Wait a second.

111
00:05:02,232 --> 00:05:03,632
Wait one damn second.

112
00:05:03,667 --> 00:05:04,799
Huh? What?

113
00:05:04,835 --> 00:05:06,901
Andy's new partner. Tell me more.

114
00:05:06,937 --> 00:05:08,615
What? I don't know,
she was on plainclothes,

115
00:05:08,639 --> 00:05:10,972
- and then she spent plainclothes...
- "She"?

116
00:05:10,999 --> 00:05:14,042
- She? She?
- That's what I said.

117
00:05:14,972 --> 00:05:17,879
Well, he's been partners
with Bert for ten years.

118
00:05:17,914 --> 00:05:20,415
- What happened to Bert?
- He reunited with his twin brother

119
00:05:20,450 --> 00:05:23,051
and they got picked
to do The Amazing Race.

120
00:05:24,582 --> 00:05:27,917
You know, there was a third one,
but Bert ate him in the womb.

121
00:05:30,332 --> 00:05:33,769
Wow, well, Andy was blindsided.

122
00:05:33,794 --> 00:05:35,827
And-and, uh, you know,

123
00:05:35,852 --> 00:05:38,543
now he spends 12 hours a
day in a car with Joanna.

124
00:05:38,568 --> 00:05:39,634
The skank.

125
00:05:39,670 --> 00:05:41,336
Okay, ladies.

126
00:05:41,371 --> 00:05:43,405
I know our brains are excellent machines

127
00:05:43,440 --> 00:05:45,006
for jumping to conclusions,

128
00:05:45,042 --> 00:05:47,409
but we don't know
anything about this Joanna.

129
00:05:47,563 --> 00:05:49,855
I know her. I see her
all the time at the ER.

130
00:05:49,880 --> 00:05:51,780
Well, there you go.
I'm sure she's very...

131
00:05:51,815 --> 00:05:55,305
Hold on, Marjorie, I want to
hear what Wendy has to say.

132
00:05:55,896 --> 00:05:57,969
You get one a year. Make it count.

133
00:05:59,256 --> 00:06:01,323
Tell me everything about her.

134
00:06:01,818 --> 00:06:03,152
She's nice.

135
00:06:05,324 --> 00:06:06,590
Is that it?

136
00:06:06,615 --> 00:06:07,706
Kinda.

137
00:06:07,731 --> 00:06:09,331
Somebody get me a can of soup.

138
00:06:09,366 --> 00:06:10,598
I'll get it out of her.

139
00:06:10,832 --> 00:06:12,734
I don't know what you want from me.

140
00:06:13,027 --> 00:06:15,136
She has two dogs, Barkley and Slayton.

141
00:06:15,172 --> 00:06:17,839
Aw, now I feel bad for
calling her a skank.

142
00:06:19,671 --> 00:06:21,467
But she still is.

143
00:06:22,818 --> 00:06:24,612
What does she look like?

144
00:06:24,637 --> 00:06:26,270
Your nostrils are scaring me.

145
00:06:27,162 --> 00:06:28,817
This is getting out of hand.

146
00:06:28,852 --> 00:06:31,643
- Calm down, Jill.
- You're right.

147
00:06:32,110 --> 00:06:34,810
Wendy, honey,

148
00:06:35,292 --> 00:06:37,258
what does she look like?

149
00:06:38,284 --> 00:06:40,985
I don't know. She's just nice.

150
00:06:41,356 --> 00:06:42,981
Around 40 years old.

151
00:06:43,006 --> 00:06:44,332
Kind of average-looking.

152
00:06:44,368 --> 00:06:47,102
Before me, average was Andy's type.

153
00:06:47,147 --> 00:06:49,481
Okay, okay, you have
no reason to suspect

154
00:06:49,506 --> 00:06:51,106
that Joanna and Andy have anything

155
00:06:51,141 --> 00:06:53,375
beyond a professional relationship.

156
00:06:53,400 --> 00:06:55,433
And, Jill, you agreed to this break

157
00:06:55,479 --> 00:06:56,578
to give him time to think,

158
00:06:56,613 --> 00:06:58,346
and you have to honor that agreement.

159
00:06:58,382 --> 00:07:00,849
Okay, but I made that
agreement before I knew about

160
00:07:00,874 --> 00:07:03,098
average Joanna and her two damn dogs.

161
00:07:03,238 --> 00:07:05,286
Oh, and she also collects vintage dolls.

162
00:07:05,311 --> 00:07:07,411
What, have you watched a
documentary on this woman?

163
00:07:07,886 --> 00:07:10,379
My kingdom for a can of soup.

164
00:07:12,518 --> 00:07:14,720
Steak, Tater Tots, beer and me.

165
00:07:14,765 --> 00:07:17,265
Your four favorite food groups.

166
00:07:17,300 --> 00:07:18,666
It all looks great.

167
00:07:18,702 --> 00:07:20,568
And again, my apologies.

168
00:07:20,604 --> 00:07:22,637
I did not know I was
striking your handsome face

169
00:07:22,662 --> 00:07:24,295
with the zipper side of the pillow.

170
00:07:24,535 --> 00:07:27,308
Apology accepted, but if
anybody at the bar asks,

171
00:07:27,344 --> 00:07:29,611
I took a guy with a knife down.

172
00:07:30,269 --> 00:07:32,847
- How's Jill doing?
- Not good.

173
00:07:32,883 --> 00:07:35,049
The Joanna bombshell
sent her into a tailspin,

174
00:07:35,085 --> 00:07:36,351
but she'll be fine.

175
00:07:36,386 --> 00:07:37,993
Yeah, but Jill's fine and normal fine

176
00:07:38,018 --> 00:07:39,451
are not the same fine.

177
00:07:40,190 --> 00:07:41,456
Go on.

178
00:07:41,491 --> 00:07:43,725
Well, you know. She comes
with a side of drama.

179
00:07:43,750 --> 00:07:46,618
It's like Andy says,
she's a bit of a handful.

180
00:07:49,907 --> 00:07:51,933
Tell me the Tater Tot

181
00:07:51,968 --> 00:07:54,569
is not the most perfect form of potato.

182
00:07:54,604 --> 00:07:57,727
You got the crispy outside,
you got the fluffy inside...

183
00:07:57,752 --> 00:07:59,151
Do you think I'm a handful?

184
00:08:02,272 --> 00:08:05,804
- What do you mean?
- Is that what you say about me?

185
00:08:06,750 --> 00:08:07,982
I don't say that.

186
00:08:08,018 --> 00:08:09,884
Andy says that about Jill.

187
00:08:09,920 --> 00:08:14,189
What I say about you is... other stuff.

188
00:08:15,425 --> 00:08:16,891
Wow.

189
00:08:17,302 --> 00:08:19,735
- Is that a good wow?
- It is not.

190
00:08:20,831 --> 00:08:22,163
I want you to explain to me

191
00:08:22,199 --> 00:08:24,332
how I got in trouble for
something that Andy said.

192
00:08:24,367 --> 00:08:26,835
- You know how.
- I-I really don't. I...

193
00:08:27,263 --> 00:08:30,170
But since you're already
mad, I'll take your Tots.

194
00:08:34,044 --> 00:08:36,644
Hey, I'm just calling
to see how you're doing.

195
00:08:36,680 --> 00:08:38,413
I'm doing a lot better now.

196
00:08:38,448 --> 00:08:39,814
Why are you whispering?

197
00:08:40,163 --> 00:08:42,350
Because Andy and Joanna have
their windows rolled down

198
00:08:42,385 --> 00:08:44,531
and they're right in front
of me at the stop sign.

199
00:08:44,821 --> 00:08:47,689
- So you're following them?
- Yep.

200
00:08:47,724 --> 00:08:50,091
And do they know you're there?

201
00:08:50,126 --> 00:08:51,493
I don't think so.

202
00:08:51,528 --> 00:08:54,496
I took my housekeeper's
car as a disguise.

203
00:08:54,521 --> 00:08:57,999
But I really wish I would've
peed before I came out here.

204
00:08:59,210 --> 00:09:01,202
Okay, I want you to listen to me.

205
00:09:01,238 --> 00:09:03,694
This is very, very wrong.

206
00:09:04,595 --> 00:09:08,007
I brought binoculars,
tacos and a jar to pee in.

207
00:09:10,965 --> 00:09:12,753
Hey, you didn't mention that
your housekeeper's car

208
00:09:12,778 --> 00:09:14,010
is also a Range Rover.

209
00:09:14,035 --> 00:09:15,595
Yeah, I gave her my old one.

210
00:09:15,620 --> 00:09:17,553
I put that woman through hell.

211
00:09:18,371 --> 00:09:21,268
Technical question...
can you see anything?

212
00:09:21,293 --> 00:09:23,823
Not really. Just give me
a heads-up if they turn.

213
00:09:23,848 --> 00:09:25,481
I got a better idea.

214
00:09:25,506 --> 00:09:27,628
How about I introduce you
to the Bonnie Plunkett School

215
00:09:27,652 --> 00:09:29,018
of Surveillance Techniques.

216
00:09:29,053 --> 00:09:31,931
Normally a masterclass I
teach out by the airport.

217
00:09:31,956 --> 00:09:34,123
I'm doing great. We're right behind 'em.

218
00:09:34,158 --> 00:09:35,269
Yeah. That's your first mistake.

219
00:09:35,293 --> 00:09:36,637
You never want to be right behind them.

220
00:09:36,661 --> 00:09:39,061
In fact, the best place
to be is in front of them.

221
00:09:39,097 --> 00:09:40,396
Well, how do I do that?

222
00:09:40,431 --> 00:09:41,731
And lesson one begins.

223
00:09:41,766 --> 00:09:43,799
All right, I'll pull over.

224
00:09:43,824 --> 00:09:45,056
No, you don't have to stop.

225
00:09:45,081 --> 00:09:46,923
Scooch your seat back, here I come.

226
00:09:46,948 --> 00:09:48,681
You want to go over or under?

227
00:09:48,706 --> 00:09:51,019
Well, pretty-pretty
sure I got to go over.

228
00:09:51,044 --> 00:09:52,410
Okay, on my mark.

229
00:09:52,435 --> 00:09:54,769
One, two, three.

230
00:09:54,794 --> 00:09:57,323
Keep your foot on the
pedals. Foot on the pedals.

231
00:09:57,348 --> 00:09:59,548
And... eject!

232
00:09:59,584 --> 00:10:02,051
Aah! Oh, my God, that worked!

233
00:10:02,093 --> 00:10:03,559
Ooh.

234
00:10:03,588 --> 00:10:06,699
Yeah, I only swerved four
feet over the yellow line.

235
00:10:06,724 --> 00:10:08,190
Nothing from your boyfriend up there.

236
00:10:08,226 --> 00:10:09,358
What kind of cops are they?

237
00:10:09,383 --> 00:10:11,661
The kind bonded by lust.

238
00:10:11,996 --> 00:10:13,529
All right, watch and learn.

239
00:10:13,564 --> 00:10:15,197
I'm gonna pull out in front of them.

240
00:10:15,233 --> 00:10:18,701
Usually I just sketch this
up on an overhead projector,

241
00:10:18,736 --> 00:10:21,103
but let's see if it actually works.

242
00:10:27,000 --> 00:10:29,200
- Mirror! Mirror!
- Right. Right.

243
00:10:29,993 --> 00:10:32,682
Oh, God, I can only see her.

244
00:10:32,707 --> 00:10:34,805
And me, looking desperate.

245
00:10:35,384 --> 00:10:38,487
And a little puffy from those tacos.

246
00:10:38,523 --> 00:10:39,922
Nobody stalks their boyfriend

247
00:10:39,958 --> 00:10:41,757
'cause their life is working out.

248
00:10:43,324 --> 00:10:45,828
How is it possible I've
been sober all this time,

249
00:10:45,853 --> 00:10:48,587
and I'm still driving
around, chasing men?

250
00:10:48,864 --> 00:10:51,324
Yeah, I thought sobering up
would get rid of my crazy, too,

251
00:10:51,349 --> 00:10:53,481
but nope, still crazy.

252
00:10:53,506 --> 00:10:57,174
Just a little less
confused during Fantasia.

253
00:10:57,442 --> 00:11:01,210
Mm. Maybe we should
just stop and go home.

254
00:11:01,682 --> 00:11:03,212
I'm proud of you, Jill.

255
00:11:03,510 --> 00:11:05,581
I knew if I came out here
and spent some time with you,

256
00:11:05,616 --> 00:11:07,149
you'd start to see that...

257
00:11:07,185 --> 00:11:08,884
Oh. They're pulling over.

258
00:11:08,909 --> 00:11:10,208
Quick, don't lose 'em.

259
00:11:10,233 --> 00:11:11,499
Uh, hang on.

260
00:11:18,319 --> 00:11:20,419
Wow. They didn't notice that, either.

261
00:11:20,444 --> 00:11:22,968
- This is fun.
- It is fun.

262
00:11:26,804 --> 00:11:30,306
Two cops, two coffees,
no doughnuts.

263
00:11:30,341 --> 00:11:32,341
Another myth exploded.

264
00:11:33,987 --> 00:11:37,556
Is it horrible that I wish
she were drop-dead gorgeous?

265
00:11:38,932 --> 00:11:40,727
I mean, I can't lose him to her.

266
00:11:40,752 --> 00:11:43,085
Well, that's awfully shallow, Jill.

267
00:11:43,885 --> 00:11:46,870
Although that mustache
isn't doing her any favors.

268
00:11:47,458 --> 00:11:50,259
No, wait. That's just a shadow.

269
00:11:50,294 --> 00:11:51,794
No, wait.

270
00:11:51,829 --> 00:11:54,630
Well, what the hell is that, then?

271
00:11:55,110 --> 00:11:56,999
If I lose him to somebody
less pretty than me,

272
00:11:57,035 --> 00:11:58,401
then it means it's me.

273
00:11:58,546 --> 00:12:00,179
You know, my insides.

274
00:12:01,249 --> 00:12:03,249
And I can't Botox my insides.

275
00:12:03,274 --> 00:12:06,079
- If only we could.
- Right?

276
00:12:09,380 --> 00:12:11,478
Oh, God, now they're laughing together.

277
00:12:11,503 --> 00:12:13,069
And that's his real laugh,

278
00:12:13,104 --> 00:12:15,805
not the fake one he
takes pity on me with.

279
00:12:15,840 --> 00:12:17,907
Adam has one of those, too.

280
00:12:17,932 --> 00:12:19,599
Heh-heh-heh.

281
00:12:19,644 --> 00:12:20,713
Always three.

282
00:12:20,738 --> 00:12:23,038
- Yeah, and they never make eye contact.
- Never.

283
00:12:23,315 --> 00:12:25,348
You know, I don't have a fake laugh.

284
00:12:25,383 --> 00:12:26,854
If something's not
funny, I just don't laugh.

285
00:12:26,879 --> 00:12:28,356
And that's what makes you awesome.

286
00:12:28,381 --> 00:12:30,815
Because you're authentic.
You are the real deal.

287
00:12:33,571 --> 00:12:35,583
I know I'm not supposed
to call him, but...

288
00:12:35,608 --> 00:12:37,975
I need to know if he's
thinking about me at all.

289
00:12:41,451 --> 00:12:43,484
Okay, he's picking up.

290
00:12:43,739 --> 00:12:45,305
He's checking caller I.D.

291
00:12:45,403 --> 00:12:46,436
And...

292
00:12:46,471 --> 00:12:47,737
he's putting it back down.

293
00:12:48,973 --> 00:12:52,041
- He sent me to voice mail.
- Because he's at work.

294
00:12:52,077 --> 00:12:54,441
They probably have a rule where
they can't take personal calls

295
00:12:54,466 --> 00:12:57,300
while they're having
coffee and-and-and laughing.

296
00:12:58,650 --> 00:13:00,003
Okay, well, then you call him.

297
00:13:00,028 --> 00:13:01,972
Well, technically, I think
that's a personal call...

298
00:13:01,997 --> 00:13:04,164
Call him.

299
00:13:06,837 --> 00:13:08,203
Okay.

300
00:13:08,489 --> 00:13:10,455
All right, he's picking it up...

301
00:13:10,480 --> 00:13:12,176
he's looking at it...

302
00:13:12,201 --> 00:13:14,335
- and he's...
- Hey. Andy.

303
00:13:15,400 --> 00:13:17,333
Wh-What is up?

304
00:13:19,015 --> 00:13:20,648
That's a good question.

305
00:13:21,606 --> 00:13:24,167
Thanks for calling. I got to go.

306
00:13:24,542 --> 00:13:27,589
Oh, he picked up for
you. That says everything.

307
00:13:27,614 --> 00:13:30,323
But, Jill, you're on a
pause with Andy. I'm not.

308
00:13:30,348 --> 00:13:31,597
He probably picked up for me

309
00:13:31,622 --> 00:13:33,634
because he thought it was
something to do with Adam.

310
00:13:33,852 --> 00:13:35,451
It's him.

311
00:13:35,487 --> 00:13:36,986
Disguise your voice.

312
00:13:37,021 --> 00:13:38,755
It's Tammy. Calm down.

313
00:13:39,823 --> 00:13:41,224
Hi.

314
00:13:41,259 --> 00:13:43,806
Jill and I are following Andy around...

315
00:13:43,831 --> 00:13:46,596
- I brought licorice. Catch me up.
- Red or black?

316
00:13:46,631 --> 00:13:48,498
Red. I'm not a serial killer.

317
00:13:48,862 --> 00:13:50,600
Oh, God, please tell me
you didn't tell Marjorie

318
00:13:50,635 --> 00:13:52,979
- what we're doing.
- Mm-mm. She fell asleep on the couch.

319
00:13:53,004 --> 00:13:55,538
- She doesn't even know I'm here.
- Good, 'cause I am not up for

320
00:13:55,573 --> 00:13:57,234
- the "Don't Stalk Boyfriends" speech.
- Mm.

321
00:13:57,259 --> 00:13:59,609
Girls, part of being sober

322
00:13:59,644 --> 00:14:00,828
is not making choices

323
00:14:00,853 --> 00:14:02,984
you're gonna have to make
an amends for down the road.

324
00:14:03,297 --> 00:14:06,664
Keep your focus on
yourself and your sobriety.

325
00:14:06,689 --> 00:14:08,273
You know, it would be
nice if someone else

326
00:14:08,298 --> 00:14:10,555
cleaned the cat box once in a blue moon.

327
00:14:10,789 --> 00:14:13,923
It's not involved with sobriety;
it's just super annoying.

328
00:14:18,083 --> 00:14:19,449
Now, this is recovery.

329
00:14:19,474 --> 00:14:22,031
I'm following a cop instead
of them following me.

330
00:14:23,168 --> 00:14:24,644
Ooh, their woo-woo lights are on!

331
00:14:24,669 --> 00:14:26,202
Everybody down! We've been made!

332
00:14:26,227 --> 00:14:27,893
No, I think they spotted that drunk guy

333
00:14:27,918 --> 00:14:29,284
stumbling out of the bowling alley.

334
00:14:29,309 --> 00:14:31,730
Oh, no shirt on. Such a giveaway.

335
00:14:35,013 --> 00:14:37,148
What's up with those, Pavarotti?

336
00:14:37,348 --> 00:14:39,382
I swiped them from Marjorie.

337
00:14:39,417 --> 00:14:41,784
She uses them to keep an
eye out for the coyotes

338
00:14:41,809 --> 00:14:43,542
during the cats' playtime.

339
00:14:45,587 --> 00:14:47,515
Ooh, Joanna's strong.

340
00:14:47,540 --> 00:14:49,826
That's a solid half nelson.

341
00:14:49,861 --> 00:14:52,171
Andy very dainty with the cuffs.

342
00:14:52,196 --> 00:14:53,476
Yeah. Comes from a lifetime

343
00:14:53,501 --> 00:14:55,501
of being the biggest person in the room.

344
00:14:55,526 --> 00:14:58,193
He accidentally crushed
a bunny when he was six.

345
00:14:58,218 --> 00:15:00,051
- Oh, my God.
- That's so sad.

346
00:15:00,076 --> 00:15:02,366
I know. I've been trying
to get him into therapy.

347
00:15:02,391 --> 00:15:04,758
Easter's a very
difficult holiday for him.

348
00:15:08,980 --> 00:15:11,247
Andy just opened
the back door for her!

349
00:15:11,282 --> 00:15:14,116
Yeah, he kind of had to. She's
got her hand full of drunk guy.

350
00:15:14,141 --> 00:15:16,057
Drunk-gonna-vomit
guy.

351
00:15:16,082 --> 00:15:17,882
Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!

352
00:15:18,836 --> 00:15:21,003
Joanna's caught a little
splash on her sleeve.

353
00:15:21,028 --> 00:15:22,928
And Andy is wiping it off for her.

354
00:15:22,953 --> 00:15:25,087
That is intimate behavior!

355
00:15:25,877 --> 00:15:27,471
I-I'm trying to think if Adam

356
00:15:27,496 --> 00:15:29,663
would wipe someone's
vomit off my sleeve.

357
00:15:29,688 --> 00:15:30,887
I guess he would.

358
00:15:30,912 --> 00:15:32,245
Of course he would.

359
00:15:32,270 --> 00:15:34,143
He's a gentleman.

360
00:15:40,385 --> 00:15:42,378
Aren't you glad we don't
drink like that anymore?

361
00:15:42,413 --> 00:15:43,846
And keep our shirts on?

362
00:15:43,882 --> 00:15:46,237
Yeah. We're so healthy now.

363
00:15:51,089 --> 00:15:53,289
Aw. Who bet they were
taking him to the hospital?

364
00:15:53,324 --> 00:15:54,406
I did.

365
00:15:54,431 --> 00:15:56,959
Damn it, I thought jail
was a stone-cold lock.

366
00:15:56,995 --> 00:15:58,661
Thank you, thank you.

367
00:15:58,696 --> 00:16:00,609
Oop. They're dragging him out.

368
00:16:00,634 --> 00:16:03,366
Marone, shirtless puker's out cold.

369
00:16:03,391 --> 00:16:04,824
And he lost a sneaker.

370
00:16:04,849 --> 00:16:06,849
Been there. You know,
people don't understand.

371
00:16:06,915 --> 00:16:09,782
Every time you see a lone
sneaker in the middle of a road,

372
00:16:10,267 --> 00:16:11,978
there's a story.

373
00:16:12,923 --> 00:16:15,344
Hey, when did Joanna have
time to put on lipstick?

374
00:16:15,369 --> 00:16:17,936
Oh, cut her some slack...
She's got puke on her sleeve.

375
00:16:18,228 --> 00:16:19,749
What are you guys doing?

376
00:16:19,784 --> 00:16:20,883
Get in. Close the door.

377
00:16:20,919 --> 00:16:22,318
We're spying on Jill's boyfriend.

378
00:16:24,220 --> 00:16:26,789
Dang it, I miss everything
since I took the night shift.

379
00:16:26,824 --> 00:16:28,069
Ooh. Licorice.

380
00:16:28,094 --> 00:16:29,444
Hey, what's going on with the drunk guy?

381
00:16:29,469 --> 00:16:30,738
Yeah, did he hit his head?

382
00:16:30,762 --> 00:16:32,139
No. We got to pump his stomach.

383
00:16:32,164 --> 00:16:33,863
Yeah! I win again. Pay up.

384
00:16:33,898 --> 00:16:35,765
And there's a warrant
out for his arrest,

385
00:16:35,800 --> 00:16:37,100
so he's going to jail after.

386
00:16:37,125 --> 00:16:39,092
Yes! Come to mama!

387
00:16:40,638 --> 00:16:43,239
Hey. See, now, right there,
why do they have to stand

388
00:16:43,264 --> 00:16:45,299
so close while they're going
over the little notepads?

389
00:16:45,324 --> 00:16:47,910
"He puked on you, yes he did, done."

390
00:16:47,946 --> 00:16:49,745
Hey, there's this guy in radiology,

391
00:16:49,781 --> 00:16:51,514
his name's Lorne, he
was in Desert Storm...

392
00:16:51,549 --> 00:16:53,861
Nobody cares about Desert Storm Lorne.

393
00:16:54,752 --> 00:16:55,952
Joanna does.

394
00:16:55,987 --> 00:16:57,920
They just moved in together.

395
00:16:58,822 --> 00:17:00,088
What?

396
00:17:00,264 --> 00:17:02,264
Yeah. They found this
cute little one-bedroom

397
00:17:02,289 --> 00:17:03,755
in a converted firehouse.

398
00:17:04,154 --> 00:17:06,762
You mean to tell me we've been
following them around all night

399
00:17:06,787 --> 00:17:08,177
and she's got a boyfriend?

400
00:17:08,202 --> 00:17:10,403
This firehouse, does
it still have the pole?

401
00:17:10,428 --> 00:17:13,622
Oh, I always wanted a
house with a fireman's pole.

402
00:17:14,138 --> 00:17:17,406
Oh, you guys, Andy's not cheating on me.

403
00:17:17,442 --> 00:17:18,941
He loves me.

404
00:17:18,966 --> 00:17:21,399
My sweet little bunny killer loves me.

405
00:17:23,881 --> 00:17:25,414
Step out of the car.

406
00:17:25,879 --> 00:17:27,312
No, uh...

407
00:17:27,337 --> 00:17:28,904
just Jill.

408
00:17:30,794 --> 00:17:32,627
How ya been?

409
00:17:35,760 --> 00:17:38,027
Wendy, don't you need
to get back inside?

410
00:17:38,272 --> 00:17:40,429
I'm the head nurse...
I can do whatever I want.

411
00:17:40,561 --> 00:17:42,398
- Head nurse?
- Since when?

412
00:17:42,433 --> 00:17:44,467
Last year, right after I moved.

413
00:17:44,502 --> 00:17:47,203
- You moved?
- Do you guys listen to anything...

414
00:17:47,238 --> 00:17:49,944
Shh! It's getting heavy.

415
00:17:49,969 --> 00:17:51,502
I wish I could read lips.

416
00:17:51,527 --> 00:17:53,886
I can. I took a class
out by the airport.

417
00:17:53,911 --> 00:17:55,845
It's like a major university out there.

418
00:17:55,880 --> 00:17:57,346
You can study anything.

419
00:17:57,382 --> 00:17:59,115
We don't need to read lips, you guys.

420
00:17:59,140 --> 00:18:00,685
This is a full-on breakup.

421
00:18:00,710 --> 00:18:01,809
What makes you say that?

422
00:18:01,881 --> 00:18:04,420
He just handed her a
key and she's crying.

423
00:18:04,455 --> 00:18:05,821
Oop. Here she comes.

424
00:18:05,846 --> 00:18:08,113
Act like we don't know everything.

425
00:18:13,065 --> 00:18:14,898
- What happened?
- How'd it go?

426
00:18:14,923 --> 00:18:16,189
We're just sitting here.

427
00:18:18,202 --> 00:18:20,037
Well, the pause is over.

428
00:18:20,561 --> 00:18:22,505
Now we're on full stop.

429
00:18:22,530 --> 00:18:24,230
Oh, honey.

430
00:18:24,255 --> 00:18:27,928
I guess it's true, I am a bit too much.

431
00:18:27,953 --> 00:18:29,019
- No.
- No. - No.

432
00:18:29,044 --> 00:18:30,010
I am.

433
00:18:30,214 --> 00:18:33,315
But for the record, so are all of you.

434
00:18:36,891 --> 00:18:38,446
Go ahead and say it.

435
00:18:38,680 --> 00:18:40,626
I should've kept the focus on myself.

436
00:18:41,110 --> 00:18:44,172
Oh, honey, I'm not gonna
say anything like that.

437
00:18:44,368 --> 00:18:47,348
Breaks my heart to see you suffering.

438
00:18:47,383 --> 00:18:50,117
I will talk to the two of you later.

439
00:18:51,832 --> 00:18:53,398
I can't believe I blew it.

440
00:18:53,918 --> 00:18:55,623
This was the best relationship I've had

441
00:18:55,658 --> 00:18:56,871
since my marriage ended.

442
00:18:56,896 --> 00:18:59,396
Mm. I remember, and you said

443
00:18:59,421 --> 00:19:03,434
that you would never meet anyone
you cared about ever again.

444
00:19:04,100 --> 00:19:07,543
But you did. And it's gonna
happen next time too

445
00:19:10,872 --> 00:19:11,879
Hey.

446
00:19:11,904 --> 00:19:14,171
I didn't know I was walking
into the girls' dorm.

447
00:19:16,657 --> 00:19:18,600
Heh-heh-heh.

448
00:19:18,841 --> 00:19:20,460
Always three.

449
00:19:21,187 --> 00:19:22,725
What did Andy do now?

450
00:19:22,750 --> 00:19:24,884
If I tell you, you'd have to pay for it.

451
00:19:24,909 --> 00:19:26,375
I appreciate the heads-up.

452
00:19:26,624 --> 00:19:28,990
Now get out. Bad time to have a penis.

453
00:19:30,963 --> 00:19:34,956
- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -
-- for www.addic7ed.com --

