1 00:00:06,501 --> 00:00:10,245 Well, well, well, look who's back. 2 00:00:10,364 --> 00:00:12,283 Where the hell you been? 3 00:00:13,308 --> 00:00:15,644 At home, sitting on your asses, 4 00:00:15,686 --> 00:00:18,213 practicing social distancing? 5 00:00:19,523 --> 00:00:22,401 Washing your hands 20 times a day 6 00:00:22,614 --> 00:00:25,279 while us essential workers risked our lives 7 00:00:25,304 --> 00:00:27,973 making sure you have enough toilet paper 8 00:00:28,676 --> 00:00:31,160 and wheat flour for your sourdough? 9 00:00:33,787 --> 00:00:35,581 What a bunch of pussies. 10 00:00:35,622 --> 00:00:38,000 And now y-you can't remember what happened 11 00:00:38,041 --> 00:00:39,918 last season on Shameless? 12 00:00:41,403 --> 00:00:42,821 Get out of here. 13 00:00:44,339 --> 00:00:45,924 Go on, get. 14 00:00:47,090 --> 00:00:49,011 Get! I will piss on your leg. 15 00:00:49,052 --> 00:00:50,762 I'll piss on your leg. 16 00:00:50,804 --> 00:00:52,514 What do you got, Gallagher? 17 00:00:52,556 --> 00:00:55,100 Sanitation Department is in bed with the real estate developers. 18 00:00:55,142 --> 00:00:56,852 It's all overseen by this cat named Otis. 19 00:00:56,894 --> 00:00:59,354 Otis wants you to bust into that house 20 00:00:59,396 --> 00:01:00,801 and take a shit in the living room. 21 00:01:00,826 --> 00:01:02,900 Okay, took a shit in somebody's living room. 22 00:01:03,138 --> 00:01:05,652 You're gonna make one hell of a cop someday, Gallagher. 23 00:01:05,694 --> 00:01:06,653 Thank you, sir. 24 00:01:06,695 --> 00:01:09,031 - Who the fuck is this? - Julia. 25 00:01:09,072 --> 00:01:10,616 They said she was young, but... 26 00:01:10,657 --> 00:01:12,724 - Who are you? - I'm Sandy... 27 00:01:13,311 --> 00:01:14,896 her girlfriend. 28 00:01:17,706 --> 00:01:19,350 We have an arrest warrant for Deborah Gallagher. 29 00:01:19,374 --> 00:01:22,482 Statutory rape of a minor, Julia Nicolo. 30 00:01:22,753 --> 00:01:25,422 - Fuck. - We got a runner! 31 00:01:25,464 --> 00:01:27,090 Stop! Police! 32 00:01:27,132 --> 00:01:29,259 So this Keg Zone stuff is actually working? 33 00:01:29,443 --> 00:01:31,845 I got 20 fully paid Keggers already. 34 00:01:31,887 --> 00:01:34,139 I'm not moving to Milwaukee. I told you that. 35 00:01:34,181 --> 00:01:35,682 Come look inside the house with me. 36 00:01:35,724 --> 00:01:37,734 It's got two beds, big backyard. 37 00:01:37,759 --> 00:01:39,561 I don't need to look inside. 38 00:01:39,603 --> 00:01:41,764 Jesus. 39 00:01:41,789 --> 00:01:44,583 - Needs some work. - Two bedrooms? 40 00:01:44,608 --> 00:01:45,984 Yeah. 41 00:01:46,026 --> 00:01:48,946 I now pronounce you husband and husband. 42 00:01:48,987 --> 00:01:50,864 - Now? - Yes, now. 43 00:02:02,167 --> 00:02:05,170 - Synced and corrected by ChrisKe - -- for www.addic7ed.com -- 44 00:03:14,722 --> 00:03:18,527 _ 45 00:03:19,202 --> 00:03:22,289 Chicago, the city of broad shoulders, 46 00:03:22,331 --> 00:03:23,373 the Windy City, 47 00:03:23,415 --> 00:03:25,459 a city with a multitude of voices, 48 00:03:25,500 --> 00:03:27,961 languages, and a vibrant history. 49 00:03:28,003 --> 00:03:29,588 From the four corners of the Earth, 50 00:03:29,630 --> 00:03:32,049 people come to the city on the lake 51 00:03:32,090 --> 00:03:33,592 to work and help create 52 00:03:33,617 --> 00:03:35,822 a truly modern metropolis. 53 00:03:37,588 --> 00:03:40,015 Yep, from all four corners 54 00:03:40,057 --> 00:03:41,224 of the Earth, all right. 55 00:03:41,266 --> 00:03:43,539 Polacks and krauts and dagos 56 00:03:43,564 --> 00:03:45,896 and the lowest of the low, the Irish... 57 00:03:45,937 --> 00:03:48,315 Starving spud famine refugees, 58 00:03:48,357 --> 00:03:49,900 like us Gallaghers. 59 00:03:51,109 --> 00:03:54,529 Every important moment in Chicago history, 60 00:03:54,554 --> 00:03:56,398 a Gallagher was there. 61 00:03:56,423 --> 00:03:59,326 The Chicago Fire, Mrs. O'Leary's cow, 62 00:03:59,814 --> 00:04:02,913 that was Great-Great-Grandma Gallagher's Holstein. 63 00:04:03,997 --> 00:04:05,624 The union stockyard workers, 64 00:04:05,666 --> 00:04:09,461 the poor bastards butchering 6,000 steers a day, 65 00:04:09,503 --> 00:04:11,171 covered in blood and shit, 66 00:04:11,196 --> 00:04:13,156 all Gallaghers. 67 00:04:14,216 --> 00:04:16,760 The Black Sox score-fixing scandal, 68 00:04:16,802 --> 00:04:17,803 a Gallagher. 69 00:04:18,006 --> 00:04:20,472 No, he wasn't a player. He was a gambler. 70 00:04:20,514 --> 00:04:22,795 Set the whole thing up. Made a bundle. 71 00:04:23,943 --> 00:04:27,622 Prohibition, Capone, you think it was all Italians? 72 00:04:27,647 --> 00:04:28,814 Hell no. 73 00:04:28,855 --> 00:04:30,774 It was Gallaghers that provided 74 00:04:30,816 --> 00:04:32,678 the homicidal muscle. 75 00:04:33,256 --> 00:04:36,927 The riots at the Democratic Convention in '68, 76 00:04:37,280 --> 00:04:39,574 yep, that was me. 77 00:04:39,616 --> 00:04:41,034 Part of the Chicago Eight. 78 00:04:41,076 --> 00:04:42,035 The Chicago Eight? 79 00:04:42,077 --> 00:04:43,620 I thought it was the Chicago Seven. 80 00:04:43,662 --> 00:04:44,663 It was eight. 81 00:04:45,044 --> 00:04:47,254 I was at a White Castle getting burgers 82 00:04:47,279 --> 00:04:49,668 for Abbie and the guys when the pigs broke in. 83 00:04:50,052 --> 00:04:53,588 So they only took seven and put 'em on trial. 84 00:04:53,630 --> 00:04:56,049 Where we're standing, right here, 85 00:04:56,091 --> 00:04:57,759 on Ashland Avenue, 86 00:04:58,020 --> 00:05:01,722 there were 20 bars on this block 100 years ago, 87 00:05:01,763 --> 00:05:04,755 each and every one of 'em owned by a Gallagher. 88 00:05:06,099 --> 00:05:10,147 Now, we got three hipster coffee shops. 89 00:05:10,188 --> 00:05:13,413 It was seven before the COVID took down the weak. 90 00:05:14,069 --> 00:05:16,153 Chinamen did us a favor with that virus. 91 00:05:16,194 --> 00:05:18,572 Who the hell needs seven coffee shops? 92 00:05:18,670 --> 00:05:20,240 Hey, do you know why they call 93 00:05:20,282 --> 00:05:22,701 this part of the South Side Back of the Yards? 94 00:05:22,743 --> 00:05:25,036 - Sure, it was right behind the... - No, no, 95 00:05:25,078 --> 00:05:27,414 not because it was behind the stockyards, 96 00:05:27,639 --> 00:05:29,916 because it was the back of the Gallagher yards. 97 00:05:29,958 --> 00:05:33,570 Every single house owned by a Gallagher. 98 00:05:33,891 --> 00:05:35,964 Is any of this true? 99 00:05:36,006 --> 00:05:38,211 Is any of this true? 100 00:05:38,914 --> 00:05:42,262 The Gallaghers built Chicago single-handedly. 101 00:05:42,304 --> 00:05:44,306 Come on, I'll take you to Leavitt Street. 102 00:05:44,347 --> 00:05:45,432 I'll show you the tenement 103 00:05:45,481 --> 00:05:48,233 where Paddy Gallagher wrote The Jungle. 104 00:05:48,418 --> 00:05:51,879 _ 105 00:06:01,072 --> 00:06:03,180 Oh, no, no. 106 00:06:03,575 --> 00:06:04,844 Let him cry. 107 00:06:05,452 --> 00:06:08,246 He's teething. 108 00:06:09,623 --> 00:06:11,541 The hell does he need teeth for anyway? 109 00:06:11,583 --> 00:06:12,918 I don't know. 110 00:06:18,507 --> 00:06:19,937 We could drug him. 111 00:06:20,342 --> 00:06:22,125 Break up a downer or something. 112 00:06:22,578 --> 00:06:24,596 Frank used to rub whiskey on our gums. 113 00:06:24,638 --> 00:06:26,949 Then he'd dump us in the tub. 114 00:06:27,371 --> 00:06:29,142 Without water, I hope. 115 00:06:30,101 --> 00:06:31,457 Not always. 116 00:06:35,023 --> 00:06:37,676 I think I'm gonna die. 117 00:06:38,485 --> 00:06:40,645 Can you die from lack of sleep? 118 00:06:43,448 --> 00:06:45,860 Oh, my God. Okay. 119 00:06:46,493 --> 00:06:50,163 - I'll get him. You start coffee. - Okay. 120 00:07:11,309 --> 00:07:13,186 Hey, where's the Mr. Coffee? 121 00:07:13,339 --> 00:07:14,729 Oh, I bought us a French press 122 00:07:14,771 --> 00:07:16,815 at an eviction yard sale. 123 00:07:16,857 --> 00:07:18,066 What? 124 00:07:18,108 --> 00:07:20,360 It's by the stove. Just add hot water. 125 00:07:20,581 --> 00:07:22,708 There's a new bag of coffee in the fridge. 126 00:07:23,521 --> 00:07:25,023 Huh. 127 00:07:30,416 --> 00:07:32,122 Hey, um, maybe we need to try something else, 128 00:07:32,163 --> 00:07:33,665 you know, with Fred teething. 129 00:07:33,707 --> 00:07:36,084 Yeah? 130 00:07:36,126 --> 00:07:37,586 Like what? 131 00:07:37,627 --> 00:07:39,170 I don't know, we could do, uh, 132 00:07:39,212 --> 00:07:41,381 I don't know, one night on, one night off. 133 00:07:41,423 --> 00:07:43,300 You know, one of us stays at my old house 134 00:07:43,341 --> 00:07:44,652 or your dad's, gets a good night's sleep 135 00:07:44,676 --> 00:07:45,736 while the other one stays here. 136 00:07:45,760 --> 00:07:48,346 We could, uh, trade off, you know? 137 00:07:48,388 --> 00:07:49,973 Okay. 138 00:07:50,015 --> 00:07:51,516 Dibs first night. 139 00:07:52,868 --> 00:07:54,286 Who got evicted? 140 00:07:54,311 --> 00:07:55,770 Aniya, that girl who was working 141 00:07:55,812 --> 00:07:57,606 at the beauty supply shop on Ashland. 142 00:07:57,647 --> 00:07:59,190 Is that the one that, uh, bellied up? 143 00:07:59,232 --> 00:08:00,358 Oh, my God. 144 00:08:00,400 --> 00:08:02,485 Yeah, yeah. One of many. 145 00:08:02,527 --> 00:08:05,447 Hey, I need you to run some errands for me today... 146 00:08:05,488 --> 00:08:07,063 Grocery, paint store. 147 00:08:08,715 --> 00:08:10,342 Is that a problem? 148 00:08:10,998 --> 00:08:12,451 No. Glad to. 149 00:08:14,831 --> 00:08:16,041 Mm. 150 00:08:17,375 --> 00:08:20,211 - I'm gonna go brush my teeth. - That's a good idea. 151 00:08:39,499 --> 00:08:40,875 Stop! 152 00:09:20,168 --> 00:09:21,545 Got you, fucker. 153 00:09:32,200 --> 00:09:33,618 Outstanding, Gallagher. 154 00:09:33,660 --> 00:09:35,328 Thank you, sir. 155 00:09:35,370 --> 00:09:36,746 Why didn't you shoot him? 156 00:09:36,788 --> 00:09:38,540 I knew I could catch him, sir. 157 00:09:38,581 --> 00:09:40,184 Uncuff him. Give me the gun. 158 00:09:43,503 --> 00:09:45,543 That's how it's done, cadets. 159 00:09:46,082 --> 00:09:48,842 Never shoot a suspect in the back. You wait for 'em to turn around, 160 00:09:48,883 --> 00:09:50,677 and then you shoot 'em in the face. 161 00:09:51,148 --> 00:09:52,746 Good to know, sir. 162 00:09:57,142 --> 00:09:58,476 Why are you shaving your head? 163 00:09:58,518 --> 00:09:59,874 'Cause I'm goin' bald. 164 00:10:00,353 --> 00:10:01,563 But you're bald now, Kev. 165 00:10:01,604 --> 00:10:04,899 Exactly. Now no one will know I was going bald. 166 00:10:04,941 --> 00:10:06,234 Science. 167 00:10:06,276 --> 00:10:08,265 Should I just pour the weed right in? 168 00:10:08,695 --> 00:10:10,363 Yeah, I think so. 169 00:10:10,405 --> 00:10:12,632 Go see if those gummies are setting up right. 170 00:10:18,430 --> 00:10:20,059 They need a few more minutes. 171 00:10:20,738 --> 00:10:23,908 Hey, no sampling the product. 172 00:10:28,631 --> 00:10:31,895 Excellent, Gemma. Nice and tight. 173 00:10:32,761 --> 00:10:34,387 Amy, good, but a little less product 174 00:10:34,429 --> 00:10:36,014 in the next one, okay? 175 00:10:36,890 --> 00:10:38,349 Kev, what are the girls doing? 176 00:10:38,391 --> 00:10:40,308 Their tiny fingers are perfect. 177 00:10:40,909 --> 00:10:42,370 Look, this is why they used little kids 178 00:10:42,395 --> 00:10:44,737 to dig stuff out of machinery back in the old days. 179 00:10:44,939 --> 00:10:47,470 They outlawed that, Kev. It's called child labor. 180 00:10:47,495 --> 00:10:50,320 Well, we're a family business now. 181 00:10:50,361 --> 00:10:51,589 We all need to pull our own weight. 182 00:10:51,613 --> 00:10:54,491 No. Girls, go finish getting ready for school, 183 00:10:54,532 --> 00:10:55,992 and don't forget your masks. 184 00:10:56,017 --> 00:10:57,202 I was gonna have 'em wash their hands 185 00:10:57,243 --> 00:10:58,971 - when they were done. - Girls, wash your hands. 186 00:10:58,995 --> 00:11:01,081 Did you pick up the display case? 187 00:11:01,122 --> 00:11:02,749 Yeah, it's in the truck. 188 00:11:02,791 --> 00:11:04,375 Isn't this exciting? 189 00:11:04,417 --> 00:11:06,586 Legal weed in Chicago? 190 00:11:06,628 --> 00:11:07,670 Can you believe it? 191 00:11:07,712 --> 00:11:10,215 Remember Diego, my roommate from the group home, 192 00:11:10,256 --> 00:11:11,674 the one with the glass eye? 193 00:11:11,716 --> 00:11:13,093 He got 20 years. 194 00:11:13,291 --> 00:11:14,934 Now we can just sell it right out in the open. 195 00:11:15,299 --> 00:11:17,180 Not out in the open. We're not licensed yet. 196 00:11:17,386 --> 00:11:19,244 And we're supposed to be closed anyway. 197 00:11:20,383 --> 00:11:21,884 Amy? 198 00:11:21,909 --> 00:11:23,786 Gemma. 199 00:11:23,978 --> 00:11:25,980 Girl's got a gift. 200 00:11:31,378 --> 00:11:34,047 Mm, morning Mr. Milkovich. 201 00:11:34,072 --> 00:11:35,657 Morning, Mr. Gallagher. 202 00:11:35,698 --> 00:11:37,909 Five times last night. I'm feeling kinda raw. 203 00:11:37,951 --> 00:11:38,993 How about you, stud? 204 00:11:39,219 --> 00:11:40,912 I could go another five right now. 205 00:11:40,954 --> 00:11:42,205 - Mm - Mm-hmm. 206 00:11:42,247 --> 00:11:44,124 Some big talk. You ready to back it up? 207 00:11:44,165 --> 00:11:45,875 Gotta get to work. 208 00:11:45,917 --> 00:11:47,305 Call in sick. 209 00:11:47,627 --> 00:11:48,795 We need the paycheck. 210 00:11:48,837 --> 00:11:50,282 All right. Your loss. 211 00:11:50,630 --> 00:11:52,226 Hey, you making breakfast for both of us? 212 00:11:52,251 --> 00:11:53,758 No. Didn't know you were gonna get up. 213 00:11:53,800 --> 00:11:54,968 You didn't get up yesterday. 214 00:11:55,337 --> 00:11:56,845 Well, throw some more bread in that bitch. 215 00:11:56,886 --> 00:12:00,014 Sorry, I only make toast for husbands who have jobs. 216 00:12:00,306 --> 00:12:02,851 - Good thing I have a job. - No, you have a laundromat owner 217 00:12:02,884 --> 00:12:04,564 who's terrified you're gonna smash his face 218 00:12:04,602 --> 00:12:06,563 - into a dryer again. - Exactly. 219 00:12:06,604 --> 00:12:07,957 I'm sure he'd write you fake pay-stubs 220 00:12:07,981 --> 00:12:10,098 to give to your parole officer if I asked him. 221 00:12:10,123 --> 00:12:12,235 That's not the point. We need more money coming in. 222 00:12:12,260 --> 00:12:13,469 All right. 223 00:12:13,528 --> 00:12:14,797 Fine, I'll hit the Stop & Shop on Rush. 224 00:12:14,821 --> 00:12:17,282 Hey, no. I don't wanna be some sad-ass prison widow 225 00:12:17,323 --> 00:12:19,075 catching a bus to Stateville every weekend. 226 00:12:19,117 --> 00:12:20,910 No? Want me to get some shitty-ass 227 00:12:20,952 --> 00:12:22,036 minimum-wage job like you, 228 00:12:22,078 --> 00:12:23,454 hauling boxes around a warehouse? 229 00:12:23,496 --> 00:12:24,539 No. 230 00:12:24,581 --> 00:12:26,791 There aren't many other jobs left around here, Mick. 231 00:12:26,833 --> 00:12:28,269 It's either Amazon or digging graves. 232 00:12:28,293 --> 00:12:29,687 Until you decide to do one or the other, 233 00:12:29,711 --> 00:12:31,921 my shitty minimum-wage job is the only money 234 00:12:31,963 --> 00:12:32,922 we got coming in. 235 00:12:33,018 --> 00:12:35,395 - And the bills are piling up. - Uh-huh. 236 00:12:36,342 --> 00:12:37,385 Okay, fine. 237 00:12:37,583 --> 00:12:39,029 I'll start digging into the wedding present money 238 00:12:39,053 --> 00:12:41,041 instead of saving it to get our own place. 239 00:12:42,974 --> 00:12:44,475 Do what you gotta do, lover. 240 00:12:44,517 --> 00:12:46,477 Me, I'm gonna go take an ice bath. 241 00:12:46,519 --> 00:12:47,948 My asshole's on fire. 242 00:12:52,025 --> 00:12:53,234 Just not right. 243 00:12:53,276 --> 00:12:55,849 I mean, Julia's only ten months younger than me. 244 00:12:56,154 --> 00:12:57,572 Why do I have to plead guilty 245 00:12:57,614 --> 00:12:59,240 and wear this fuckin' ankle bracelet 246 00:12:59,282 --> 00:13:01,367 and do all that community service 247 00:13:01,409 --> 00:13:03,953 when Carl did the exact same thing with Julia 248 00:13:03,995 --> 00:13:05,413 but they didn't arrest him? 249 00:13:05,455 --> 00:13:07,290 Well, not exactly the same thing. 250 00:13:07,332 --> 00:13:11,584 He wasn't banging Julia and her mom at the same time. 251 00:13:12,003 --> 00:13:14,130 No, that judge just hates lesbians. 252 00:13:14,518 --> 00:13:16,883 I mean, did you see the way that he looked at me, 253 00:13:16,925 --> 00:13:18,343 at Julia? 254 00:13:18,384 --> 00:13:19,677 It was disgust. 255 00:13:19,719 --> 00:13:20,887 Mm, I don't know. 256 00:13:20,929 --> 00:13:22,072 He seemed pretty into it to me, 257 00:13:22,096 --> 00:13:24,474 especially when, uh, Julia was describing 258 00:13:24,515 --> 00:13:26,726 how you used to go down on her for hours. 259 00:13:28,186 --> 00:13:29,687 It's looking good, sweetie. 260 00:13:29,729 --> 00:13:31,564 Okay, it's time to get ready for school. 261 00:13:31,606 --> 00:13:34,786 No more Zoom. Real school. Let's put your shoes on. 262 00:13:34,811 --> 00:13:36,531 How long do you think it'll be before the school 263 00:13:36,569 --> 00:13:38,196 shuts down again this time? 264 00:13:38,238 --> 00:13:39,631 I bet a week. 265 00:13:39,920 --> 00:13:41,032 UPS just dropped this off. 266 00:13:41,074 --> 00:13:42,825 It came! 267 00:13:42,867 --> 00:13:44,827 - What is it? - Gotta put 'em on. 268 00:13:44,852 --> 00:13:45,975 Put what on? 269 00:13:46,788 --> 00:13:48,206 Let's go. 270 00:13:48,881 --> 00:13:50,802 _ 271 00:13:50,959 --> 00:13:53,503 Hmm. What do you think? 272 00:13:54,076 --> 00:13:55,296 Everything? 273 00:13:55,338 --> 00:13:58,240 Welding, plumbing, carpentry, household repairs. 274 00:13:58,434 --> 00:14:00,478 I mean, it could have multiple meanings. 275 00:14:00,832 --> 00:14:02,107 What? 276 00:14:03,680 --> 00:14:05,787 Liam, no. 277 00:14:05,850 --> 00:14:07,976 Hello, Debbie Does Everything? 278 00:14:08,017 --> 00:14:10,395 Um, I've got a rusty pipe. 279 00:14:10,436 --> 00:14:12,204 You think you could shine it up for me? 280 00:14:12,229 --> 00:14:13,731 Look at my truck. 281 00:14:13,773 --> 00:14:15,900 That doesn't tell you that I'm a handyman? 282 00:14:16,143 --> 00:14:19,591 Debbie Does Everything? My sewer line is clogged. 283 00:14:19,616 --> 00:14:23,036 Can you please come over and plunge it for me? 284 00:14:28,538 --> 00:14:30,039 Huh. 285 00:14:32,101 --> 00:14:35,521 You see that house with the "For Sale" sign? 286 00:14:36,454 --> 00:14:38,840 The Sons of Columbus burned a cross in the yard 287 00:14:38,881 --> 00:14:41,426 the first night the Jacksons moved in. 288 00:14:41,467 --> 00:14:43,219 But the Jacksons were tough. 289 00:14:43,261 --> 00:14:46,514 Used to be sharecroppers in Alabama. 290 00:14:46,750 --> 00:14:49,192 A racist bonfire didn't scare them. 291 00:14:52,301 --> 00:14:57,249 Mr. Jackson died of the 'VID last spring. 292 00:14:57,430 --> 00:15:00,770 He was a janitor over at Mercy. 293 00:15:06,228 --> 00:15:08,228 Getting a little dry here, laddie. 294 00:15:11,792 --> 00:15:13,711 My memory elixir! 295 00:15:15,311 --> 00:15:16,937 Hey... 296 00:15:17,416 --> 00:15:20,423 thanks for caring for what I have to say, by the way. 297 00:15:20,465 --> 00:15:24,177 Well, you're the only person who responded to my flyer. 298 00:15:28,140 --> 00:15:32,602 "Units start as low as $170,000." 299 00:15:32,866 --> 00:15:37,007 Time was, you could've bought a whole block down here 300 00:15:37,032 --> 00:15:38,966 for that much money. 301 00:15:40,692 --> 00:15:42,402 Everything's changing. 302 00:15:44,325 --> 00:15:46,458 The Prius crowd is moving in, 303 00:15:46,991 --> 00:15:49,744 taking advantage of the folks who lost their jobs 304 00:15:49,786 --> 00:15:51,120 in the Corona hoax. 305 00:15:51,145 --> 00:15:53,536 - Oh, hey, girl! - Hey! 306 00:15:55,720 --> 00:15:57,305 Let's go over by the park. 307 00:15:58,044 --> 00:15:59,587 I'll show you 308 00:15:59,841 --> 00:16:03,028 where the best crack house in Chicago used to be, 309 00:16:03,383 --> 00:16:05,551 see if any of the old gang's still around. 310 00:16:09,847 --> 00:16:11,182 Okay, Franny. 311 00:16:11,301 --> 00:16:13,303 Remember, no hugging anybody. 312 00:16:20,857 --> 00:16:22,043 They say anything about going back 313 00:16:22,068 --> 00:16:23,236 to alternating days, yet? 314 00:16:23,277 --> 00:16:24,404 Jesus, I hope not. 315 00:16:24,688 --> 00:16:27,198 Boss won't let me bring Tommy to work anymore. 316 00:16:27,240 --> 00:16:29,688 - Who's the new guy? - Uh, Barry. 317 00:16:30,192 --> 00:16:31,360 What'd he do? 318 00:16:31,536 --> 00:16:33,485 Rapist, I think. 319 00:16:33,955 --> 00:16:35,039 Yeah, he just got out. 320 00:16:35,081 --> 00:16:36,141 His son's kinda cute, though. 321 00:16:36,165 --> 00:16:37,583 He's the spiky-haired one 322 00:16:37,625 --> 00:16:39,194 right there in the Slayer shirt, you see him? 323 00:16:39,219 --> 00:16:41,003 Hey, Slash! Anyone gives you shit, 324 00:16:41,045 --> 00:16:42,880 I just want you to punch 'em in the throat 325 00:16:42,905 --> 00:16:44,240 like I showed you. 326 00:16:44,407 --> 00:16:46,701 Barry, you're over the line, man. 327 00:16:48,803 --> 00:16:49,804 The fuck'd you say? 328 00:16:49,846 --> 00:16:52,056 That line... It's exactly 500 feet 329 00:16:52,098 --> 00:16:53,474 from the school's entrance. 330 00:16:53,516 --> 00:16:55,309 If you cross it, the cops could bust you. 331 00:16:55,351 --> 00:16:57,193 Oh. Okay. Thanks. 332 00:16:57,728 --> 00:16:58,974 - Appreciate it. - Yeah. 333 00:16:59,539 --> 00:17:01,958 Debbie, misdemeanor... Statutory rape. 334 00:17:02,091 --> 00:17:04,110 But she was only ten months younger than me. 335 00:17:04,152 --> 00:17:07,196 Barry, statutory two, with felony. 336 00:17:07,230 --> 00:17:09,364 But hey, she looked 20. 337 00:17:11,492 --> 00:17:12,577 I love you, Franny. 338 00:17:12,602 --> 00:17:14,896 Remember, no hugging the other kids. 339 00:17:34,536 --> 00:17:35,996 IOUs? 340 00:17:37,560 --> 00:17:39,429 What the fuck is this? 341 00:17:39,729 --> 00:17:42,106 I go to get our money for the utilities 342 00:17:42,148 --> 00:17:45,776 out of our wedding cash, and all I find is IOUs. 343 00:17:45,818 --> 00:17:47,379 You spent all our money from the wedding? 344 00:17:47,403 --> 00:17:49,238 Relax, you know I'm good for it. 345 00:17:49,280 --> 00:17:51,908 That's not the point. It's not your money. 346 00:17:51,933 --> 00:17:53,308 It's our money. 347 00:17:54,168 --> 00:17:56,829 Okay, so I spent some of our money. 348 00:17:56,887 --> 00:17:58,222 On what? 349 00:17:58,418 --> 00:18:00,151 I don't know. Stuff. 350 00:18:00,541 --> 00:18:03,675 It's-it's not your money to spend. 351 00:18:03,920 --> 00:18:06,005 We decided we were saving it to get our own place. 352 00:18:06,047 --> 00:18:08,841 No, no. You decided we were saving it to get our own place. 353 00:18:08,883 --> 00:18:10,152 I said we should use the wedding money 354 00:18:10,176 --> 00:18:11,403 for us to have some fuckin' fun. 355 00:18:11,427 --> 00:18:12,637 Yeah, one of us has certainly 356 00:18:12,678 --> 00:18:13,822 been having some fuckin' fun. 357 00:18:13,846 --> 00:18:16,349 Oh, quit being a bitch. I'll pay it back. 358 00:18:19,999 --> 00:18:21,793 Oh. 359 00:18:22,193 --> 00:18:25,024 We're supposed to be making these decisions together. 360 00:18:25,343 --> 00:18:29,820 Okay, so can I use some of our money to buy a beer? 361 00:18:29,862 --> 00:18:32,365 - One beer. - Sure. One beer. 362 00:18:32,406 --> 00:18:35,115 - Yes. - Great. So what about lube? 363 00:18:35,284 --> 00:18:37,453 Can I use our money to buy lube? 364 00:18:37,687 --> 00:18:39,705 You're the one who likes that expensive strawberry shit. 365 00:18:39,747 --> 00:18:41,290 I'm good with spit. 366 00:18:41,332 --> 00:18:43,853 What about your meds? Ain't cheap. 367 00:18:44,168 --> 00:18:46,087 That comin' out of your money or our money 368 00:18:46,128 --> 00:18:48,440 - or is that coming out of... - There isn't any your money 369 00:18:48,464 --> 00:18:50,716 or my money, there's only our money. 370 00:18:50,758 --> 00:18:52,843 That's what happens when you get married. 371 00:18:52,885 --> 00:18:54,011 Sure. 372 00:18:58,975 --> 00:19:00,977 I gotta get to work. 373 00:19:17,451 --> 00:19:19,829 Okay, I'm off. 374 00:19:19,870 --> 00:19:21,998 You have a good day with Daddy, all right? 375 00:19:22,676 --> 00:19:25,084 I thought you were gonna fix the wheel on that jogger yesterday. 376 00:19:25,126 --> 00:19:27,128 Yeah, no. I got caught up with this. 377 00:19:27,169 --> 00:19:29,005 Okay, well, do it, and take Fred for a run. 378 00:19:29,046 --> 00:19:31,757 Fresh air's supposed to help babies sleep at night. 379 00:19:31,933 --> 00:19:34,143 And then I need you to go by the paint store 380 00:19:34,168 --> 00:19:35,595 and pick up four gallons of this: 381 00:19:35,636 --> 00:19:38,139 - Seafoam Morning Mist. - Mm-hmm. 382 00:19:38,343 --> 00:19:39,682 And then can you swing by Voodoo Java 383 00:19:39,724 --> 00:19:41,767 and get me a skinny grande latte with extra foam 384 00:19:41,792 --> 00:19:42,910 and drop it by the salon? 385 00:19:43,444 --> 00:19:46,076 I've got ten clients today, and I am not gonna make it 386 00:19:46,101 --> 00:19:47,319 without my midday caffeine. 387 00:19:51,068 --> 00:19:53,404 So how much did we pay for this? 388 00:19:53,429 --> 00:19:55,139 It's a '47 Chief. 389 00:19:55,164 --> 00:19:56,264 Mm-hmm. 390 00:19:58,034 --> 00:19:59,366 3 grand. 391 00:20:00,244 --> 00:20:01,787 Just 'cause things are tight, 392 00:20:01,829 --> 00:20:03,599 you know, the salon was closed for a long time, 393 00:20:03,623 --> 00:20:06,217 your hours being cut back at the shop, so... 394 00:20:07,278 --> 00:20:09,030 Voodoo Java? 395 00:20:09,670 --> 00:20:11,655 I know, but it's so good. 396 00:20:12,465 --> 00:20:14,550 Well, you know, this'll be worth, I mean, 397 00:20:14,592 --> 00:20:17,511 around 12 when I'm done, maybe even more. 398 00:20:17,536 --> 00:20:18,988 Mm. 399 00:20:19,447 --> 00:20:20,531 - All right. - Yeah. 400 00:20:20,556 --> 00:20:21,932 - Bye. - Muah. 401 00:20:21,974 --> 00:20:23,351 Don't forget to wear your mask. 402 00:20:23,392 --> 00:20:25,353 I don't wanna get that shit again. 403 00:20:25,378 --> 00:20:26,504 Ha. 404 00:20:29,190 --> 00:20:30,895 I made a big mistake, son. 405 00:20:31,192 --> 00:20:32,318 See, I rented this house 406 00:20:32,360 --> 00:20:33,503 without asking your mommy first, 407 00:20:33,527 --> 00:20:36,213 and now I'm basically her bitch. 408 00:20:40,413 --> 00:20:43,913 Gallagher, you ready for this afternoon, cadet? 409 00:20:43,954 --> 00:20:46,295 - Sir. - Department's counting on you. 410 00:20:46,707 --> 00:20:47,833 I won't let you down. 411 00:20:47,875 --> 00:20:49,460 Don't let that oath mess ya up. 412 00:20:49,502 --> 00:20:51,128 - Sir? - Yeah, you know, 413 00:20:51,170 --> 00:20:53,506 the truth, the whole truth, nothin' but the truth... 414 00:20:53,547 --> 00:20:55,091 It's all bullshit. 415 00:20:55,381 --> 00:20:57,110 You just tell the judge what they need to hear to convict. 416 00:20:57,134 --> 00:20:58,594 The bastard's guilty as hell. 417 00:20:58,619 --> 00:21:00,037 Roger that. 418 00:21:00,240 --> 00:21:03,307 I'm, uh, I'm aware your academy application 419 00:21:03,349 --> 00:21:05,615 included several irregularities. 420 00:21:05,958 --> 00:21:07,543 Irregularities, sir? 421 00:21:07,687 --> 00:21:10,364 Your age, your IQ score. 422 00:21:11,254 --> 00:21:13,526 But with the loss of so many officers to the 'rona, 423 00:21:13,715 --> 00:21:15,670 the bosses are willing to put you on the street, 424 00:21:15,695 --> 00:21:17,255 as long as you do the right thing today. 425 00:21:17,279 --> 00:21:18,989 - I will, sir. - It's not a tough call 426 00:21:19,031 --> 00:21:20,199 to give you a badge. 427 00:21:20,241 --> 00:21:22,618 You're number one in your class in firearms, 428 00:21:22,660 --> 00:21:24,286 choke holds, baton beatings. 429 00:21:24,590 --> 00:21:26,205 Well, what about my classroom work, sir? 430 00:21:26,247 --> 00:21:28,374 You know, state laws, criminal statutes? 431 00:21:28,416 --> 00:21:29,458 I'm kind of a slow reader. 432 00:21:29,500 --> 00:21:30,584 Dead last. 433 00:21:30,626 --> 00:21:32,187 But, hey, you don't have to be an Einstein 434 00:21:32,211 --> 00:21:33,408 to wear the blue. 435 00:21:33,970 --> 00:21:35,464 Bustin' heads is a man's job, 436 00:21:35,775 --> 00:21:37,508 and you are a natural born ass kicker. 437 00:21:37,775 --> 00:21:40,052 So you go in that courtroom this afternoon and kick ass. 438 00:21:40,094 --> 00:21:41,887 - Huh? - Yes, sir. 439 00:21:43,464 --> 00:21:46,884 I like making bad decisions 440 00:21:46,934 --> 00:21:49,437 That's right, Jamie. Keep those ropes movin'. 441 00:21:49,478 --> 00:21:52,148 Your rhomboids are loving it. 442 00:21:52,173 --> 00:21:53,800 Back straight. 443 00:21:53,858 --> 00:21:55,109 Engage those abs. 444 00:21:55,151 --> 00:21:56,485 That's it, Celeste. 445 00:21:56,527 --> 00:21:58,028 That's two more laps. 446 00:21:58,070 --> 00:21:59,530 You got this. 447 00:21:59,572 --> 00:22:01,532 All right, listen up, kombucha drinkers. 448 00:22:01,944 --> 00:22:03,868 The Alibi has special prices 449 00:22:03,909 --> 00:22:05,835 for all your cannabis needs. 450 00:22:06,078 --> 00:22:07,037 Sore muscles? 451 00:22:07,079 --> 00:22:08,765 Anxiety 'cause you're not getting enough likes 452 00:22:08,789 --> 00:22:11,249 for your most recent adorable puppy post? 453 00:22:11,459 --> 00:22:13,461 The Alibi's got two-for-one deals 454 00:22:13,502 --> 00:22:15,379 on all spliffs for anyone wearing 455 00:22:15,421 --> 00:22:16,630 a Kev Fit t-shirt, 456 00:22:16,672 --> 00:22:18,358 which are for sale right over there on that tire. 457 00:22:18,382 --> 00:22:20,551 What the hell are you doing, Dash? 458 00:22:20,593 --> 00:22:22,011 Get your over-educated ass up 459 00:22:22,052 --> 00:22:24,597 and give me another 50 mailbox presses. 460 00:22:26,328 --> 00:22:29,435 - Jesus, man. Are you all right? - It's my crypto. 461 00:22:29,477 --> 00:22:32,188 - Your what? - My Bitcoin. 462 00:22:32,229 --> 00:22:33,814 It's down 30, and I was using it 463 00:22:33,856 --> 00:22:35,816 to leverage my Tether and my Ethereum. 464 00:22:36,156 --> 00:22:38,736 I have no idea what you just said. 465 00:22:39,268 --> 00:22:42,031 Oil futures gutted my portfolio last spring. 466 00:22:42,072 --> 00:22:44,658 So if there's another two-point drop on my cryptos, 467 00:22:44,700 --> 00:22:46,869 I'll have to cover a margin call. 468 00:22:46,911 --> 00:22:47,995 So that's bad. 469 00:22:48,409 --> 00:22:50,080 It's fucking Death Star Order of the Sith 470 00:22:50,122 --> 00:22:52,875 Korriban invasion exploding planet bad, man! 471 00:22:52,917 --> 00:22:55,628 I'll-I'll have to call my-my dad. 472 00:22:55,669 --> 00:22:57,440 - I got you. Come on. - Okay. 473 00:23:01,650 --> 00:23:03,891 _ 474 00:23:20,694 --> 00:23:25,491 Blue Dream. Yellow Sunflower. 475 00:23:25,768 --> 00:23:28,369 Purple Haze. Our five-year-old daughter Gemma 476 00:23:28,410 --> 00:23:29,912 rolled those herself. 477 00:23:29,954 --> 00:23:32,248 Pink Peppermint. 478 00:23:32,289 --> 00:23:33,624 Mama's Mocha. 479 00:23:33,666 --> 00:23:36,168 Gorilla... although, I don't recommend Gorilla 480 00:23:36,210 --> 00:23:37,419 for a beginner like you. 481 00:23:37,477 --> 00:23:38,395 Oh, I'm not a beginner. 482 00:23:38,420 --> 00:23:39,606 I smoked a lot of weed in college. 483 00:23:39,630 --> 00:23:41,549 College weed, not the same thing. 484 00:23:41,590 --> 00:23:43,088 Where'd you go to college? 485 00:23:43,455 --> 00:23:45,928 - Kenyon. - Where the fuck is Kenyon? 486 00:23:46,385 --> 00:23:48,430 Ohio. 487 00:23:48,472 --> 00:23:50,933 Yeah, you're a rookie. 488 00:23:50,975 --> 00:23:53,018 Stick with the gummies and the baked goods. 489 00:23:53,060 --> 00:23:56,379 V baked these brownies herself this morning. 490 00:23:56,404 --> 00:23:57,731 Ooh, I love brownies. 491 00:23:57,773 --> 00:23:59,000 You've had these kind of brownies? 492 00:23:59,024 --> 00:24:00,401 No, but they look delicious. 493 00:24:00,442 --> 00:24:02,027 They have a kick. You gotta make sure 494 00:24:02,069 --> 00:24:04,572 you have someplace safe to sit after you eat one. 495 00:24:04,613 --> 00:24:05,656 One brownie? 496 00:24:05,698 --> 00:24:08,325 Jesus, potheads are a bunch of pussies. 497 00:24:08,367 --> 00:24:10,298 I knocked back 15 tequila shots 498 00:24:10,323 --> 00:24:13,247 at my nephew's weird socially distant wedding last week, 499 00:24:13,289 --> 00:24:16,070 - and was fine driving home. - Fifteen? 500 00:24:16,095 --> 00:24:17,644 You check the grill of your car the next morning 501 00:24:17,668 --> 00:24:20,045 to make sure there wasn't blood and hanks of hair? 502 00:24:20,070 --> 00:24:22,114 What's a socially distanced wedding like? 503 00:24:22,139 --> 00:24:23,224 Stupid. 504 00:24:23,316 --> 00:24:24,692 It was one person per pew, 505 00:24:24,717 --> 00:24:26,510 and the bride and groom kissed each other 506 00:24:26,552 --> 00:24:27,511 with their masks on. 507 00:24:27,553 --> 00:24:28,697 Like they're not just gonna go back 508 00:24:28,721 --> 00:24:31,192 to the Honeymoon Hotel and bang boots. 509 00:24:31,217 --> 00:24:34,685 Okay, weed is for old hippies and cancer patients. 510 00:24:34,710 --> 00:24:36,003 Real men drink. 511 00:24:36,334 --> 00:24:39,857 Taylor Swift over there needs a shot of JB, not gummies. 512 00:24:39,899 --> 00:24:43,360 I-I tried weed when Grammy had some for her glaucoma. 513 00:24:43,402 --> 00:24:44,570 Made me sleepy. 514 00:24:44,612 --> 00:24:47,072 Aw, this isn't your grammy's weed, Kermit. 515 00:24:47,114 --> 00:24:48,574 Glaucoma weed is a Prius. 516 00:24:48,616 --> 00:24:50,826 This is a Ferrari at Daytona weed. 517 00:24:50,868 --> 00:24:53,721 We're closed. 518 00:24:55,218 --> 00:24:57,625 City of Chicago says all bars are closed 519 00:24:57,666 --> 00:24:59,421 until further notice. 520 00:25:02,963 --> 00:25:04,580 Go, go, go, go, go! Hide in the back. 521 00:25:04,605 --> 00:25:07,375 - This is what we practiced. - We are absolutely complying 522 00:25:07,400 --> 00:25:09,653 with the mayor's very smart decision 523 00:25:09,678 --> 00:25:13,057 to close all bars and taverns. 524 00:25:17,895 --> 00:25:20,648 Distractions all around 525 00:25:20,689 --> 00:25:22,232 - What's up? - Oh, my... 526 00:25:22,274 --> 00:25:24,234 - The fuck, Kev? - Come on. 527 00:25:24,276 --> 00:25:25,986 Hail 'rona survivors. 528 00:25:26,028 --> 00:25:27,696 What-where is everyone? 529 00:25:27,721 --> 00:25:29,181 Fuck, Frank? 530 00:25:29,239 --> 00:25:30,717 You were supposed to use the secret knock 531 00:25:30,741 --> 00:25:31,909 on the door in the gym. 532 00:25:31,951 --> 00:25:32,868 What? No, no. 533 00:25:32,910 --> 00:25:35,287 I heard somewhere bars are open again. 534 00:25:35,329 --> 00:25:39,124 Three weeks ago, maybe. Mayor shut us all down again on Tuesday. 535 00:25:39,262 --> 00:25:41,710 Well, who the hell can keep track? 536 00:25:41,863 --> 00:25:44,385 And excuse me, but fuck the mayor. 537 00:25:44,410 --> 00:25:46,966 He has no authority to tread upon my rights 538 00:25:47,007 --> 00:25:48,588 as a free American male 539 00:25:48,613 --> 00:25:51,791 to drink my favorite brew in the tavern of my choice. 540 00:25:51,816 --> 00:25:55,409 The mayor is a she, and she has every right to do it, and has. 541 00:25:55,434 --> 00:25:57,518 Come on out, everyone. It's just Frank. 542 00:25:57,559 --> 00:26:00,533 There they are. Do you want to... 543 00:26:00,790 --> 00:26:01,998 False alarm, everybody. 544 00:26:02,022 --> 00:26:03,273 Uh, this is-this is Brad. 545 00:26:03,315 --> 00:26:05,693 He's making a major film about me. 546 00:26:05,734 --> 00:26:06,902 Actually, my name is Alan. 547 00:26:06,944 --> 00:26:09,744 I'm a graduate student at Lake Forest. 548 00:26:10,556 --> 00:26:13,064 Holy shit. 549 00:26:14,535 --> 00:26:16,537 What the hell is that? 550 00:26:16,578 --> 00:26:20,124 Have I finally arrived at Mecca after a long pilgrimage? 551 00:26:20,165 --> 00:26:22,001 Hands off, Frank. We're not offering credit 552 00:26:22,042 --> 00:26:23,168 on cannabis products. 553 00:26:23,210 --> 00:26:24,336 Payment up front only. 554 00:26:24,540 --> 00:26:27,506 Lake Forest? The hell are you doing all the way down here? 555 00:26:27,548 --> 00:26:29,049 My doctoral dissertation 556 00:26:29,091 --> 00:26:30,801 is on neighborhoods in transition 557 00:26:30,843 --> 00:26:32,261 due to the economic displacement 558 00:26:32,302 --> 00:26:33,387 caused by the pandemic. 559 00:26:33,429 --> 00:26:34,990 Well, you've come to the right place. 560 00:26:35,014 --> 00:26:37,307 Lots of economic displacement and transition 561 00:26:37,349 --> 00:26:38,552 going on around here. 562 00:26:38,826 --> 00:26:41,203 Gentrification, my friends. 563 00:26:41,228 --> 00:26:43,480 The ten percenters gobbling up what's left 564 00:26:43,522 --> 00:26:46,818 of the working man's dreams when he's down and out. 565 00:26:47,294 --> 00:26:51,155 Felled by a tiny, lifeless microbe. 566 00:26:51,196 --> 00:26:53,271 We're the last of the Mohicans. 567 00:26:54,005 --> 00:26:56,577 Chicago aboriginals struggling to preserve 568 00:26:56,618 --> 00:26:57,745 a vanishing culture. 569 00:26:57,786 --> 00:27:01,206 Actually, there were aboriginal cultures here before us. 570 00:27:01,248 --> 00:27:03,000 The Miami and the Kickapoo tribes. 571 00:27:03,042 --> 00:27:04,168 Also Gallaghers. 572 00:27:04,209 --> 00:27:05,872 Kev, could we? 573 00:27:06,771 --> 00:27:10,441 Oh, shit, I... pay the man. 574 00:27:10,466 --> 00:27:13,052 - Do you take Venmo? - Hell no. 575 00:27:13,093 --> 00:27:15,929 Holy shit. 576 00:27:18,373 --> 00:27:20,392 - Gorilla? - Yep. 577 00:27:20,434 --> 00:27:22,519 Ohio. 578 00:27:24,980 --> 00:27:26,815 Hey, Mrs. Lionetti, I'm almost done. 579 00:27:26,857 --> 00:27:28,295 Leave. Now. 580 00:27:28,776 --> 00:27:30,402 Huh? I'm almost finished. 581 00:27:30,444 --> 00:27:32,613 - Seven? - Seven what? 582 00:27:32,654 --> 00:27:35,532 - She was seven years old? - Who was seven years old? 583 00:27:35,574 --> 00:27:37,285 If my Tony were still alive, 584 00:27:37,310 --> 00:27:39,161 he'd take you down to the lake, shoot you, 585 00:27:39,203 --> 00:27:40,370 and push you in for the fish. 586 00:27:40,412 --> 00:27:41,580 What are you talking about? 587 00:27:41,622 --> 00:27:44,957 I got a notification. I checked the website. 588 00:27:44,982 --> 00:27:47,669 - What website? - The sex offender website. 589 00:27:48,052 --> 00:27:49,970 And your picture is on it. 590 00:27:50,176 --> 00:27:52,136 This is you, right? 591 00:28:34,007 --> 00:28:35,968 Hey, Hassan, coffee still fresh? 592 00:28:35,993 --> 00:28:37,286 Four hours old. 593 00:28:37,311 --> 00:28:38,479 That's good enough. 594 00:28:41,140 --> 00:28:42,891 Gimme one sec. 595 00:28:51,358 --> 00:28:53,336 - That still a buck? - Yep. 596 00:28:55,946 --> 00:28:57,239 Here you go. 597 00:28:57,264 --> 00:28:58,807 Thank you. 598 00:29:06,331 --> 00:29:09,543 $5.49? Jesus. 599 00:29:23,432 --> 00:29:27,060 He spent all our wedding money on God knows what. 600 00:29:27,102 --> 00:29:29,062 Isn't marriage supposed to be about communication? 601 00:29:29,276 --> 00:29:31,774 Compromise? Agreed upon mutual fuckin' goals? 602 00:29:31,799 --> 00:29:33,459 How's that supposed to happen when one person in the marriage 603 00:29:33,483 --> 00:29:35,493 just goes off and does whatever the hell he wants 604 00:29:35,518 --> 00:29:37,529 without telling the other person what he's doing? 605 00:29:37,705 --> 00:29:40,741 Sounds just like me and my first husband, Juan. No communication. 606 00:29:40,782 --> 00:29:42,218 He sits around the house all day 607 00:29:42,242 --> 00:29:44,828 like we're not in the worst economy since the Depression. 608 00:29:44,870 --> 00:29:46,455 Says we're still on our honeymoon. 609 00:29:46,496 --> 00:29:49,499 - How long you been married? - Six months. 610 00:29:49,541 --> 00:29:51,084 What's he expect us to live on? 611 00:29:51,126 --> 00:29:52,669 The bills are piling up. 612 00:29:52,711 --> 00:29:54,087 Marriage is hard. 613 00:29:54,129 --> 00:29:56,482 You should've worked that shit out before you tied the knot. 614 00:29:56,661 --> 00:29:59,915 Once you're married, it's already too late. 615 00:30:39,675 --> 00:30:41,510 Thanks, Teri. 616 00:30:46,431 --> 00:30:48,809 - Hey. - Hi. 617 00:30:48,850 --> 00:30:51,061 Look at you. You fixed the jogger. 618 00:30:51,103 --> 00:30:52,938 Yeah. 619 00:30:52,980 --> 00:30:56,391 Hello, baby of mine. Hi. 620 00:30:57,289 --> 00:31:00,112 Wow. You're sweating. 621 00:31:00,153 --> 00:31:02,531 I did five miles. 622 00:31:02,556 --> 00:31:05,711 Thank God. You're my savior. 623 00:31:06,703 --> 00:31:09,288 And, uh, two packets raw sugar, right? 624 00:31:09,329 --> 00:31:11,999 - Yes. Thanks. - Here you go. 625 00:31:13,375 --> 00:31:14,793 Did you go by the paint store yet? 626 00:31:14,835 --> 00:31:16,628 I'm heading there next. 627 00:31:16,670 --> 00:31:19,906 Oh. Where's my foam? 628 00:31:20,929 --> 00:31:23,510 Oh, uh, you know, it must've gotten 629 00:31:23,552 --> 00:31:26,138 all mixed in, you know, when I was running. 630 00:31:26,179 --> 00:31:27,973 Oh. 631 00:31:33,434 --> 00:31:34,695 Oh, God. 632 00:31:36,346 --> 00:31:37,722 Delicious. 633 00:31:37,747 --> 00:31:39,382 Thank you. 634 00:31:39,961 --> 00:31:40,837 Both: Muah. 635 00:31:41,074 --> 00:31:42,700 Oh. 636 00:31:49,881 --> 00:31:53,623 Seven! It says Julia was seven years old, not 17. 637 00:31:54,916 --> 00:31:56,333 It's not fuckin' funny. 638 00:31:56,358 --> 00:31:58,670 Everybody's gonna think I'm a child molester. 639 00:31:59,022 --> 00:32:00,888 Well, you sort of are. 640 00:32:00,913 --> 00:32:03,759 It's got my address, my social security number, my email. 641 00:32:03,800 --> 00:32:04,926 God damn it. 642 00:32:05,055 --> 00:32:06,237 I'm lucky if the neighborhood moms 643 00:32:06,261 --> 00:32:08,444 don't show up out front tonight with torches 644 00:32:08,469 --> 00:32:10,824 to hang me from the playground swing set. 645 00:32:10,849 --> 00:32:13,393 Okay, it's probably not that big of a deal. 646 00:32:13,435 --> 00:32:14,936 Look at all these other guys. 647 00:32:14,978 --> 00:32:17,314 - What? - All these little dots 648 00:32:17,356 --> 00:32:19,358 on the map are sex offenders in the area. 649 00:32:19,399 --> 00:32:20,942 Jesus. 650 00:32:20,984 --> 00:32:22,152 There must be 100 of them. 651 00:32:22,194 --> 00:32:24,363 What the fuck is wrong with people? 652 00:32:25,198 --> 00:32:27,382 Hey, that's Mr. Mosier down the block. 653 00:32:27,674 --> 00:32:29,659 I knew it. He was always way too into Halloween. 654 00:32:29,701 --> 00:32:31,416 Nice picture, though. 655 00:32:33,163 --> 00:32:35,123 You're sexy. 656 00:32:35,227 --> 00:32:38,063 I mean, look at that cleavage. 657 00:32:39,044 --> 00:32:42,047 - Yeah, I do look pretty hot. - Mm-hmm. 658 00:32:42,089 --> 00:32:43,590 Oh, shit. 659 00:32:43,615 --> 00:32:45,700 Who the hell is gonna hire me now? 660 00:32:49,049 --> 00:32:51,264 I told Lieutenant Rucker I was undercover, 661 00:32:51,611 --> 00:32:53,141 but he said I wasn't undercover. 662 00:32:53,760 --> 00:32:56,658 But I was. Which is why I'm here today. 663 00:32:57,955 --> 00:33:00,899 What were you asked to do in that house, Mr. Gallagher? 664 00:33:00,924 --> 00:33:03,318 Empty my bowels, ma'am. 665 00:33:03,360 --> 00:33:07,322 - So, defecate? - I did not defecate. 666 00:33:07,347 --> 00:33:08,831 I took a shit. 667 00:33:09,533 --> 00:33:11,660 Can you point to the man 668 00:33:11,701 --> 00:33:13,578 who told you to take that shit? 669 00:33:13,822 --> 00:33:15,448 That's him, ma'am. 670 00:33:15,789 --> 00:33:16,998 Please let the record show 671 00:33:17,040 --> 00:33:20,919 Mr. Gallagher identified the defendant, Otis Grange. 672 00:33:22,355 --> 00:33:25,931 - _ - Mr. Winston. 673 00:33:29,215 --> 00:33:30,954 So, Mr. Gallagher, 674 00:33:31,602 --> 00:33:33,115 you're a police cadet, are you not? 675 00:33:33,140 --> 00:33:34,474 Yes, sir. 676 00:33:34,516 --> 00:33:36,601 And you're 19 years old? 677 00:33:36,643 --> 00:33:37,994 Almost 20, sir. 678 00:33:38,019 --> 00:33:40,021 And how exactly did you get a spot 679 00:33:40,063 --> 00:33:44,550 at the Chicago Police Academy at such a tender age? 680 00:33:44,734 --> 00:33:47,821 Tender? I'm not tender, sir. 681 00:33:47,863 --> 00:33:48,947 I work out. 682 00:33:48,989 --> 00:33:51,241 - I can bench 240. - Good for you. 683 00:33:51,283 --> 00:33:54,035 Did anyone promise you a spot at the police academy 684 00:33:54,077 --> 00:33:56,923 in exchange for your testimony against my client today? 685 00:33:56,948 --> 00:33:59,124 Sir, if you were to work garbage duty 686 00:33:59,166 --> 00:34:00,876 in Chicago for six months, 687 00:34:00,901 --> 00:34:02,653 you'd deserve a spot, too. 688 00:34:02,678 --> 00:34:03,846 Is that a no? 689 00:34:04,018 --> 00:34:06,518 Garbage in Chicago is dirty, sir. 690 00:34:06,923 --> 00:34:08,341 Very dirty. 691 00:34:08,383 --> 00:34:10,260 So no quid pro quo. 692 00:34:10,302 --> 00:34:11,344 Squid pro what? 693 00:34:11,386 --> 00:34:14,459 Were you told that you could enter the police academy 694 00:34:14,484 --> 00:34:17,392 two years early in exchange for your testimony? 695 00:34:17,812 --> 00:34:20,061 And let me remind you that you have taken an oath 696 00:34:20,103 --> 00:34:21,980 in this court to tell the truth, 697 00:34:22,022 --> 00:34:24,608 and only the truth, so help you God. 698 00:34:24,649 --> 00:34:25,942 No, sir. 699 00:34:25,984 --> 00:34:27,611 I got into the academy because they know 700 00:34:27,652 --> 00:34:30,197 I'm gonna be a great police officer. 701 00:34:30,238 --> 00:34:32,919 You understand, Mr. Gallagher, 702 00:34:33,493 --> 00:34:35,826 that lying under oath is perjury, 703 00:34:36,036 --> 00:34:38,663 punishable by up to five years in state prison. 704 00:34:38,705 --> 00:34:40,540 Are you calling me a liar, sir? 705 00:34:40,763 --> 00:34:43,293 Why? Because I grew up poor on the South Side? 706 00:34:43,607 --> 00:34:46,296 Because my father is a drunk and my mother was a junkie? 707 00:34:46,338 --> 00:34:47,756 Because I'm not as smart as you 708 00:34:47,797 --> 00:34:50,822 and you can humiliate me using big words I don't know. 709 00:34:50,847 --> 00:34:53,153 I got into the academy because they know 710 00:34:53,178 --> 00:34:54,845 when we roll up on a gun fight, 711 00:34:54,870 --> 00:34:56,473 I'll be the one running towards the shooting, 712 00:34:56,515 --> 00:35:00,212 not away from it. They know when a 911 call comes in 713 00:35:00,237 --> 00:35:02,687 and it's some bastard scumbag pistol-whipping 714 00:35:02,729 --> 00:35:05,275 a little girl, trying to steal her pink bicycle, 715 00:35:05,300 --> 00:35:08,527 that I'll be there, ready to take a bullet in the face. 716 00:35:15,671 --> 00:35:17,506 O... kay. 717 00:35:19,204 --> 00:35:21,498 There you go. Hey, man. 718 00:35:21,540 --> 00:35:23,716 - Yo, Flavio. - Hey. 719 00:35:23,741 --> 00:35:24,739 I didn't know you worked here. 720 00:35:24,764 --> 00:35:26,020 I thought you were still at Rowdy's Chicken. 721 00:35:26,044 --> 00:35:27,671 Yeah, yeah, Rowdy's closed for good, man. 722 00:35:27,712 --> 00:35:30,268 I survived the first shutdown, but not the second one. 723 00:35:30,293 --> 00:35:32,425 So, my uncle got me a job here. 724 00:35:32,467 --> 00:35:33,426 He's afraid of my mom. 725 00:35:33,676 --> 00:35:35,213 We all are. She drinking again? 726 00:35:35,238 --> 00:35:36,680 Yeah. Waving that gun around. 727 00:35:36,721 --> 00:35:38,265 - Oh, yeah. - Yeah. 728 00:35:38,306 --> 00:35:39,224 That your kid? 729 00:35:39,699 --> 00:35:42,602 Uh, yeah, that's Fred. Oh, he's sleeping. 730 00:35:42,644 --> 00:35:44,604 Hey, look, you got, uh, 731 00:35:44,646 --> 00:35:47,732 this Seafoam Morning Mist? 732 00:35:47,757 --> 00:35:50,145 Uh, sure, yeah. The Monticello Collection. 733 00:35:50,170 --> 00:35:52,003 Supposed to be the colors Thomas Jefferson created 734 00:35:52,028 --> 00:35:53,071 for Monticello. 735 00:35:53,113 --> 00:35:54,281 No kidding. Jefferson, huh? 736 00:35:54,322 --> 00:35:55,782 Yeah, it's probably bullshit, 737 00:35:55,824 --> 00:35:57,973 but the PBR crowd eats it up. 738 00:35:57,998 --> 00:35:59,911 - It's pricey, though. - Yeah? How pricey? 739 00:35:59,953 --> 00:36:01,037 Uh, how many you need? 740 00:36:01,079 --> 00:36:02,581 I don't know, four gallons. 741 00:36:02,622 --> 00:36:04,708 Set you back a little over a hundie with tax. 742 00:36:04,749 --> 00:36:06,376 - Ooh. - Yeah. 743 00:36:06,418 --> 00:36:07,551 Um... 744 00:36:08,487 --> 00:36:10,448 Hey, what about these? 745 00:36:11,006 --> 00:36:13,300 Paint the yoga mat ladies buy and then return 746 00:36:13,341 --> 00:36:15,221 'cause they say it didn't match the sample book. 747 00:36:15,438 --> 00:36:18,691 - Got any blues? - Mm, probably. 748 00:36:21,106 --> 00:36:22,816 Mm, hmm... 749 00:36:23,718 --> 00:36:24,594 Hey. 750 00:36:24,769 --> 00:36:27,022 Oh, wait, what about this one? 751 00:36:27,063 --> 00:36:28,773 Ah, no, they're not the same. 752 00:36:28,815 --> 00:36:31,901 Ah, it's close enough. You got another one of these blues? 753 00:36:31,950 --> 00:36:33,535 Uh... 754 00:36:33,570 --> 00:36:35,530 Yeah, yeah. 755 00:36:35,572 --> 00:36:37,282 All right, great. 756 00:36:37,324 --> 00:36:39,117 Now we just need two more. 757 00:36:39,599 --> 00:36:40,827 That's not bad. 758 00:36:40,869 --> 00:36:43,496 Hey, what do you think about those? 759 00:36:43,538 --> 00:36:44,956 And blend together in the mixer, 760 00:36:44,998 --> 00:36:46,183 pour the mixed paint 761 00:36:46,207 --> 00:36:47,292 back into the cans. 762 00:36:47,334 --> 00:36:48,894 You write Seafoam Morning Mist on those cans, 763 00:36:48,918 --> 00:36:50,688 there's an extra tenner in it for you, all right? 764 00:36:50,712 --> 00:36:52,213 - Deal. - Thank you, thank you. 765 00:36:52,255 --> 00:36:53,214 Thank you. 766 00:36:53,256 --> 00:36:56,167 Hey, we're all set, okay, bud? 767 00:36:56,446 --> 00:36:58,206 We're almost outta here, all right? 768 00:37:01,885 --> 00:37:04,142 You check to make sure he's still breathing? 769 00:37:04,184 --> 00:37:05,955 I think he wet his pants. 770 00:37:06,435 --> 00:37:07,621 Where the hell'd you get that? 771 00:37:07,771 --> 00:37:10,357 On the floor. Joe College didn't finish it. 772 00:37:10,744 --> 00:37:13,276 Pretty good shit. I'd give it four puffs. 773 00:37:13,318 --> 00:37:16,471 - How's the Blue Dream? - Mm. 774 00:37:16,905 --> 00:37:19,157 "You'll float on a downy bank of clouds 775 00:37:19,199 --> 00:37:21,117 on a bright summer's day." 776 00:37:21,159 --> 00:37:22,494 The Pink Peppermint? 777 00:37:22,535 --> 00:37:24,120 "Hints of an herb garden, 778 00:37:24,162 --> 00:37:26,439 Alice in Wonderland, and the Mad Hatter." 779 00:37:26,464 --> 00:37:27,808 What flavor are the gummies, lime? 780 00:37:27,832 --> 00:37:29,602 - Mm-hmm. - Jesus, where the fuck are we? 781 00:37:29,626 --> 00:37:31,659 Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory? 782 00:37:31,878 --> 00:37:33,797 What about the Purple Haze? Is it really strong? 783 00:37:33,838 --> 00:37:36,174 Uh, I'm not too sure about that one. We just got that one in. 784 00:37:36,216 --> 00:37:38,051 But our daughter Gemma... She's five... 785 00:37:38,093 --> 00:37:39,469 - She rolled those herself. - Oh. 786 00:37:39,511 --> 00:37:41,388 Maybe I could be of some help. 787 00:37:41,429 --> 00:37:43,306 Why don't you order one of each, 788 00:37:43,348 --> 00:37:45,183 and I can sample them for you 789 00:37:45,327 --> 00:37:48,978 and then rate them on my world-renowned Gallagher Puff Scale? 790 00:37:49,020 --> 00:37:52,774 - Puff Scale? - One puff being a glass of rosé 791 00:37:52,816 --> 00:37:54,526 on a warm, summery day. 792 00:37:54,567 --> 00:37:57,237 Five puffs being you wake up naked in an alley 793 00:37:57,278 --> 00:37:58,339 with something stuck in your ass, 794 00:37:58,363 --> 00:38:00,115 no idea where the fuck you are. 795 00:38:00,156 --> 00:38:01,825 Leave the customers alone, Frank. 796 00:38:01,866 --> 00:38:04,536 Two Pink Peppermints and ten gummies, please. 797 00:38:04,577 --> 00:38:06,119 Christ. Do we really need 798 00:38:06,144 --> 00:38:08,623 another legal intoxicating substance? 799 00:38:08,665 --> 00:38:12,136 - That shit's a gateway drug. - Weed? 800 00:38:12,502 --> 00:38:16,264 We're 20 years into the next century, Nancy Reagan. 801 00:38:16,289 --> 00:38:19,342 It's really a question of personal freedom. 802 00:38:19,508 --> 00:38:21,261 Why is it any of your damn business 803 00:38:21,302 --> 00:38:24,062 if I choose to smoke a fat one after dinner? 804 00:38:24,477 --> 00:38:28,268 Or shoot up in the privacy of my local Denny's bathroom? 805 00:38:28,309 --> 00:38:31,354 It's my life. My body, my choice. 806 00:38:31,396 --> 00:38:32,748 Your problem, Tommy, is you think 807 00:38:32,772 --> 00:38:34,149 knocking back boilermakers 808 00:38:34,190 --> 00:38:35,900 while your ass is stuck on that stool 809 00:38:35,942 --> 00:38:37,360 is something that all red-blooded 810 00:38:37,402 --> 00:38:39,571 white American males are supposed to do, 811 00:38:39,612 --> 00:38:43,241 while smoking weed is a Black folk thing. 812 00:38:43,283 --> 00:38:45,201 The only reason why marijuana's been illegal 813 00:38:45,243 --> 00:38:46,595 for the last hundred years is because 814 00:38:46,619 --> 00:38:49,057 poor Black people in the ghetto were smoking it. 815 00:38:49,082 --> 00:38:51,875 Marijuana prosecution was criminalized racism. 816 00:38:51,916 --> 00:38:55,128 Now that white people decided they like smoking it, 817 00:38:55,170 --> 00:38:56,700 it has to be made legal. 818 00:38:56,725 --> 00:38:58,798 Can't make lily white kids go to prison 819 00:38:58,840 --> 00:39:00,467 for having a couple of blunts. 820 00:39:00,639 --> 00:39:03,803 That's it. That's how we stop it. 821 00:39:03,845 --> 00:39:05,934 We've been getting gentrified 822 00:39:05,959 --> 00:39:09,350 because it's gotten too safe down here. 823 00:39:09,560 --> 00:39:11,603 The murder rate was at an all-time low 824 00:39:11,644 --> 00:39:13,519 before the 'VID, right? 825 00:39:14,675 --> 00:39:17,533 Rich people weren't afraid to move down here. 826 00:39:17,558 --> 00:39:21,362 But now that we've had a few good riots, 827 00:39:21,404 --> 00:39:23,323 burned a few bougie stores, 828 00:39:23,364 --> 00:39:26,447 I'll bet you the gentrifiers are gettin' nervous. 829 00:39:26,472 --> 00:39:31,388 All we gotta do is make the Yards dangerous again. 830 00:39:31,413 --> 00:39:34,167 Make sure the murder rate is rising. 831 00:39:34,209 --> 00:39:35,376 Spill some blood. 832 00:39:35,418 --> 00:39:37,253 What? We have to shoot people? 833 00:39:37,295 --> 00:39:39,422 No, no, not just any people. 834 00:39:39,464 --> 00:39:40,507 The right people. 835 00:39:40,725 --> 00:39:44,385 Shoot a couple of Millennials, like Alan here. 836 00:39:44,632 --> 00:39:47,847 Oh, ho, the gentrifiers would be on the first Uber 837 00:39:47,889 --> 00:39:49,390 back to Bucktown. 838 00:39:49,432 --> 00:39:51,684 It's a little extreme, don't you think? 839 00:39:51,726 --> 00:39:54,419 Well, you don't have to kill him. 840 00:39:54,444 --> 00:39:57,065 Just wound them. Get on the news. 841 00:39:57,106 --> 00:39:59,725 Make the South Side dangerous again. 842 00:39:59,750 --> 00:40:01,435 That's the Chicago I loved. 843 00:40:01,694 --> 00:40:02,862 A lot of bleeding. 844 00:40:02,904 --> 00:40:05,073 Well, I should probably get going. 845 00:40:05,114 --> 00:40:08,753 Oh, hey! It was so great meeting you. 846 00:40:08,778 --> 00:40:11,184 - Take care! - Not that door. Back door. 847 00:40:11,746 --> 00:40:13,832 Don't be a stranger. 848 00:40:17,460 --> 00:40:20,169 He sure acts like he's having a pretty great time. 849 00:40:20,839 --> 00:40:22,924 Hey, you know, we should try it. 850 00:40:22,966 --> 00:40:25,218 No thanks. I'm not a loser. 851 00:40:25,260 --> 00:40:27,303 It's great for the immune system. 852 00:40:27,345 --> 00:40:30,538 Also the libido. I've had epic sex on weed. 853 00:40:30,563 --> 00:40:33,591 If you don't wanna smoke it, why not try a brownie? 854 00:40:34,021 --> 00:40:36,271 They're all-natural and delicious, too. 855 00:40:36,319 --> 00:40:37,918 Who doesn't love a brownie? 856 00:40:39,065 --> 00:40:40,552 Okay, one brownie. 857 00:40:41,109 --> 00:40:43,072 - Tommy? - Nope. 858 00:40:46,531 --> 00:40:49,939 Mmm, these are delicious. 859 00:40:51,202 --> 00:40:52,650 Come on. What are you, chicken? 860 00:40:53,538 --> 00:40:55,456 Chicken? A-are we in second grade? 861 00:40:57,542 --> 00:41:00,169 Fine. Oh, God. 862 00:41:00,211 --> 00:41:02,005 Fine, gimme the damn brownie. 863 00:41:08,428 --> 00:41:09,387 Not bad. 864 00:41:09,429 --> 00:41:13,391 Oh! Hey, if you're giving free samples, can I... 865 00:41:24,527 --> 00:41:26,863 - Going down, sir? - He's going down. 866 00:41:26,905 --> 00:41:28,629 Congratulations, Gallagher. 867 00:41:28,654 --> 00:41:30,783 You're gonna get to be one of the best of the best, 868 00:41:30,825 --> 00:41:33,453 a goddamn Chicago police officer. 869 00:41:33,494 --> 00:41:36,915 Thank you, sir. 870 00:41:41,794 --> 00:41:44,130 - Hey. - Hey. Shh. 871 00:41:44,172 --> 00:41:46,090 - Naptime? - Yeah. 872 00:41:46,132 --> 00:41:47,759 Now he sleeps. 873 00:41:47,800 --> 00:41:49,677 He'll be up all night later. He's teething. 874 00:41:49,719 --> 00:41:52,388 Have you tried Frank's whiskey trick with the tub? 875 00:41:52,430 --> 00:41:54,682 I'm pretty sure that's considered bad parenting now. 876 00:41:54,724 --> 00:41:58,102 I'm pretty sure that was considered bad parenting then. 877 00:42:02,065 --> 00:42:03,219 What's up? 878 00:42:04,203 --> 00:42:07,781 Oh, the whole marriage thing is harder than it looks. 879 00:42:08,488 --> 00:42:10,281 Do you and Tami share your money? 880 00:42:10,432 --> 00:42:12,070 We're not married. 881 00:42:12,617 --> 00:42:14,202 You say so. 882 00:42:14,243 --> 00:42:15,745 So how do you handle your cash? 883 00:42:15,787 --> 00:42:18,289 Do you put it all together, or just some of it, or what? 884 00:42:18,331 --> 00:42:19,791 Here, hold this wrench, will you? 885 00:42:19,832 --> 00:42:21,209 Yeah. 886 00:42:21,250 --> 00:42:23,836 The money? Uh... 887 00:42:24,018 --> 00:42:26,356 Uh, I guess Tami kinda runs things. 888 00:42:27,279 --> 00:42:29,759 So you just give her all your money and that's it? 889 00:42:29,801 --> 00:42:32,762 We don't really have enough money to worry about it. 890 00:42:32,804 --> 00:42:34,427 But, uh, truth is, 891 00:42:34,847 --> 00:42:36,497 I don't really care much about money. 892 00:42:37,183 --> 00:42:38,693 And she cares a lot. 893 00:42:39,474 --> 00:42:41,246 Me and you, we never had much of anything growing up, 894 00:42:41,270 --> 00:42:43,022 and we always managed to get by, right? 895 00:42:43,064 --> 00:42:44,825 - Barely. - Lemme see. 896 00:42:45,608 --> 00:42:48,653 Tami, she always had enough. 897 00:42:49,060 --> 00:42:52,011 Ever since this pandemic, she's worried we won't. 898 00:42:52,615 --> 00:42:54,575 It's weird how people with money 899 00:42:54,617 --> 00:42:55,986 are always afraid of losing it 900 00:42:56,011 --> 00:42:58,830 and all poor people can think about is spending it. 901 00:43:00,543 --> 00:43:03,459 But do you decide what you're gonna spend money on together? 902 00:43:03,501 --> 00:43:05,378 Well, there's really not much to decide. 903 00:43:05,420 --> 00:43:09,507 We're, uh, pretty much broke at the end of the month. 904 00:43:09,549 --> 00:43:10,876 Why? 905 00:43:11,551 --> 00:43:13,636 You and Mick having some money troubles? 906 00:43:13,661 --> 00:43:16,622 Yeah, I make it, and he doesn't. 907 00:43:18,001 --> 00:43:19,702 What, you didn't wanna talk about any of that stuff 908 00:43:19,726 --> 00:43:20,768 before you got married? 909 00:43:20,810 --> 00:43:23,360 I figured we just agreed on how things were gonna work. 910 00:43:24,118 --> 00:43:25,815 Guess not, huh? 911 00:43:25,857 --> 00:43:27,900 Yeah. It's my mistake, I guess. 912 00:43:27,942 --> 00:43:30,221 Well, gotta talk about it. 913 00:43:31,565 --> 00:43:35,104 Right? You compromise, all that couple shit. 914 00:43:35,992 --> 00:43:39,495 Look, you, uh, love each other, 915 00:43:40,926 --> 00:43:42,427 Right? 916 00:43:42,557 --> 00:43:45,501 - Yes. - Okay, so, 917 00:43:45,737 --> 00:43:47,837 gotta get on the same page about how this marriage thing 918 00:43:47,862 --> 00:43:49,206 is supposed to work. 919 00:43:51,466 --> 00:43:52,818 You sure I can't just get him to do 920 00:43:52,842 --> 00:43:54,370 everything the way I want? 921 00:43:54,886 --> 00:43:56,995 Pretty sure, yeah. 922 00:44:00,558 --> 00:44:02,036 Look, we didn't have parents who could show us 923 00:44:02,060 --> 00:44:05,021 what a relationship was supposed to look like. 924 00:44:05,046 --> 00:44:07,003 We gotta figure out that shit as we go. 925 00:44:10,418 --> 00:44:12,754 The hell was that... Dr. Phil? 926 00:44:12,779 --> 00:44:14,447 Good Housekeeping. 927 00:44:14,582 --> 00:44:16,425 It's on the rack at the well-child checkup. 928 00:44:19,243 --> 00:44:20,387 Can you at least take the mugshot 929 00:44:20,411 --> 00:44:21,662 with my cleavage off the site 930 00:44:21,704 --> 00:44:23,461 and get Julia's age right? 931 00:44:24,373 --> 00:44:26,578 Yes, she was 17, not seven. 932 00:44:27,201 --> 00:44:29,351 Well, then check the damn court records! 933 00:44:30,445 --> 00:44:34,265 I'm on probation... would I be on probation if she'd been seven? 934 00:44:35,371 --> 00:44:36,331 Really? 935 00:44:36,773 --> 00:44:39,305 You can get probation if you diddled a seven-year-old? 936 00:44:39,347 --> 00:44:40,448 That's really fucked up. 937 00:44:41,808 --> 00:44:44,378 Yes, please. Thank you so much. 938 00:44:45,652 --> 00:44:48,940 Okay, she said she's gonna correct Julia's age, 939 00:44:48,981 --> 00:44:51,245 but they won't do anything about the mugshot. 940 00:44:51,702 --> 00:44:53,932 Well, I'm getting a lot of hits. 941 00:44:53,957 --> 00:44:55,583 On what? 942 00:44:55,608 --> 00:44:57,240 Your new Instagram account. 943 00:44:57,506 --> 00:44:59,242 What new account? 944 00:44:59,296 --> 00:45:01,842 @DebbieHotLesbianConvict. 945 00:45:02,178 --> 00:45:04,664 I put it up with your cleavage mugshot. 946 00:45:04,705 --> 00:45:07,250 "Wrongly convicted lesbian welder." 947 00:45:07,291 --> 00:45:09,001 Would it have happened if she wasn't queer? 948 00:45:09,043 --> 00:45:11,504 Would anyone have cared if she wasn't a lesbian? 949 00:45:11,546 --> 00:45:13,756 It's blowing up. 950 00:45:13,798 --> 00:45:15,550 Everybody wants to hire you. 951 00:45:15,591 --> 00:45:17,051 Jesus, really? 952 00:45:17,194 --> 00:45:19,542 Well, lots of lesbians, anyway. 953 00:45:20,958 --> 00:45:23,464 And some seriously creepy old white dudes. 954 00:45:26,936 --> 00:45:28,104 Hm. 955 00:45:28,146 --> 00:45:30,815 HotLesbianConvict. 956 00:45:37,780 --> 00:45:39,615 You two okay? 957 00:45:43,090 --> 00:45:44,925 Did you eat all the brownies? 958 00:45:45,147 --> 00:45:47,915 I had three, and Tommy had four. 959 00:45:47,957 --> 00:45:49,709 - Four? - We were hungry. 960 00:45:49,750 --> 00:45:54,088 - Kev! These fools ate all the brownies. - And the gummies. 961 00:45:54,379 --> 00:45:56,714 Jesus! 962 00:45:57,508 --> 00:45:58,801 Are they okay? 963 00:45:58,843 --> 00:46:00,428 I'm fine. 964 00:46:00,469 --> 00:46:02,346 I just gotta hit the head. 965 00:46:02,371 --> 00:46:04,832 Yeah, yeah me too. 966 00:46:11,689 --> 00:46:13,955 Do you have a gas can around here, Kev? 967 00:46:14,374 --> 00:46:15,626 What are you going on about? 968 00:46:15,651 --> 00:46:18,126 Making the South Side even more dangerous. 969 00:46:18,151 --> 00:46:21,324 I'm thinking we set a cop car on fire. 970 00:46:21,365 --> 00:46:26,370 The cops have to show up with riot gear, tear gas. 971 00:46:46,098 --> 00:46:48,935 I always loved this song. 972 00:46:48,976 --> 00:46:51,687 Yeah. Me too. 973 00:46:59,487 --> 00:47:01,239 ? But the pain still grows ? 974 00:47:01,280 --> 00:47:04,408 ? It's no stranger to you and me ? 975 00:47:07,536 --> 00:47:09,080 ? I can feel it ? 976 00:47:09,121 --> 00:47:13,793 ? Coming in the air tonight ? 977 00:47:13,834 --> 00:47:16,879 ? Oh, Lord ? 978 00:47:16,921 --> 00:47:20,466 ? Well, I've been waiting for this moment ? 979 00:47:20,508 --> 00:47:23,928 ? For all my life ? 980 00:47:23,970 --> 00:47:27,098 ? Oh, Lord ? 981 00:47:27,139 --> 00:47:31,060 ? I can feel it in the air tonight ? 982 00:47:31,102 --> 00:47:34,272 ? Oh, Lord ? 983 00:47:34,313 --> 00:47:37,566 ? Oh, Lord ? 984 00:47:37,608 --> 00:47:40,653 ? Well, I've been waiting for this moment ? 985 00:47:40,695 --> 00:47:44,115 ? For all my life ? 986 00:47:44,156 --> 00:47:47,493 ? Oh, Lord ? 987 00:47:47,535 --> 00:47:50,871 ? I can feel it coming ? 988 00:47:50,913 --> 00:47:53,082 ? In the air tonight ? 989 00:47:54,500 --> 00:47:55,751 ? Oh, Lord ? 990 00:47:57,878 --> 00:48:01,048 ? And I've been waiting for this moment ? 991 00:48:01,090 --> 00:48:04,218 ? For all my life ? 992 00:48:04,260 --> 00:48:07,513 We need to be honest with each other, all right? 993 00:48:07,555 --> 00:48:08,926 No more secrets. 994 00:48:09,473 --> 00:48:10,975 - No more secrets at all? - No. 995 00:48:11,641 --> 00:48:12,918 Nothing but truth. 996 00:48:15,104 --> 00:48:16,873 We should've talked about what we expected from each other 997 00:48:16,897 --> 00:48:18,441 before we got married, but we didn't, 998 00:48:18,482 --> 00:48:20,818 - so now we have to. - Look, if this is about 999 00:48:20,843 --> 00:48:22,931 the wedding money, I'm gonna pay it back, man. 1000 00:48:23,279 --> 00:48:25,579 Yes, but it's also about... 1001 00:48:26,367 --> 00:48:28,469 It's about what we want the marriage to be. 1002 00:48:29,705 --> 00:48:31,623 We need some rules. 1003 00:48:31,829 --> 00:48:33,080 Yeah, I'm not great with rules. 1004 00:48:33,122 --> 00:48:36,208 A mutual understanding of how shit is gonna work. 1005 00:48:36,452 --> 00:48:37,663 What does that mean? 1006 00:48:38,377 --> 00:48:40,379 Like, how we spend money together, 1007 00:48:40,421 --> 00:48:43,264 joint purchases, monogamy. 1008 00:48:44,109 --> 00:48:45,421 The hell is that? 1009 00:48:45,885 --> 00:48:47,546 Not fucking other people. 1010 00:48:48,548 --> 00:48:50,175 Oh. 1011 00:48:52,266 --> 00:48:53,434 We just talking fucking, 1012 00:48:53,476 --> 00:48:55,687 or are we talking about blow jobs, too? 1013 00:48:56,512 --> 00:48:58,764 I think blow jobs should count, yeah. 1014 00:49:00,070 --> 00:49:01,382 Right. 1015 00:49:05,608 --> 00:49:07,866 You really never wanna fuck anybody else? 1016 00:49:08,425 --> 00:49:10,647 I mean, I... if I'm being honest, 1017 00:49:11,202 --> 00:49:12,670 I'm not really sure either. 1018 00:49:13,913 --> 00:49:15,873 It's just kinda hard to imagine 1019 00:49:15,915 --> 00:49:17,833 that I'm never, ever gonna wanna 1020 00:49:17,875 --> 00:49:19,576 fuck anyone else, you know? 1021 00:49:20,294 --> 00:49:21,701 But I also know I... 1022 00:49:22,678 --> 00:49:24,660 definitely don't want you to fuck anyone else. 1023 00:49:24,685 --> 00:49:27,277 Well, hold on, that just means you wanna be able to fuck other people 1024 00:49:27,301 --> 00:49:28,760 but you don't want me to be able to fuck other people. 1025 00:49:28,785 --> 00:49:30,034 That doesn't sound fair. 1026 00:49:32,321 --> 00:49:34,700 Okay, so we're both monogamous 1027 00:49:34,725 --> 00:49:36,036 or we both get to fuck other people. 1028 00:49:36,060 --> 00:49:39,080 - Yeah. That sounds fair. - Mm-hmm. 1029 00:49:41,816 --> 00:49:43,596 What do you wanna do? 1030 00:49:45,277 --> 00:49:46,237 What do you wanna do? 1031 00:49:46,262 --> 00:49:48,390 I asked you first. 1032 00:49:50,866 --> 00:49:52,147 I don't know. 1033 00:49:52,706 --> 00:49:54,916 Okay, uh, I'll tell you what. 1034 00:49:56,122 --> 00:49:58,124 We'll both each write down what we want, 1035 00:49:58,165 --> 00:50:01,538 then we'll turn our answers over at the same time. 1036 00:50:02,503 --> 00:50:04,672 Great. 1037 00:50:30,639 --> 00:50:32,933 So we both turn 'em over on three. 1038 00:50:34,076 --> 00:50:36,871 One, two, three. 1039 00:50:36,912 --> 00:50:38,130 _ 1040 00:50:38,482 --> 00:50:39,516 Hey, turn your fuckin' paper over. 1041 00:50:39,540 --> 00:50:40,725 I think I spelled monogamy wrong. 1042 00:50:40,749 --> 00:50:42,060 - I spelled monogamy wrong! - Will you let me... 1043 00:50:42,084 --> 00:50:43,919 I spelled it wrong! Oh, shit, he-ey-ey-ey! 1044 00:50:43,961 --> 00:50:46,441 Look who's a real cop now. 1045 00:50:46,466 --> 00:50:48,924 Yep. Badge, gun, and everything. 1046 00:50:48,966 --> 00:50:50,134 - You graduated? - Tomorrow. 1047 00:50:50,176 --> 00:50:51,486 But they gave us the uniforms today 1048 00:50:51,510 --> 00:50:52,821 so we can wear 'em to the ceremony. 1049 00:50:52,845 --> 00:50:55,389 Fuckin' fantastic. No more parking tickets for me. 1050 00:50:55,431 --> 00:50:57,324 You don't have a car, dumbass. 1051 00:50:57,892 --> 00:50:59,310 - Hey. - Hey. 1052 00:50:59,351 --> 00:51:00,954 - Where y'all goin'? - Lip and Tami's. 1053 00:51:00,978 --> 00:51:03,105 Gotta finish dry-walling the living room. 1054 00:51:03,334 --> 00:51:04,957 Hey, y'all get enough chicken? 1055 00:51:04,982 --> 00:51:07,030 Two buckets of extra crispy. 1056 00:51:08,878 --> 00:51:10,129 You two coming or what? 1057 00:51:10,154 --> 00:51:11,465 - Hell yeah. Hell yeah. - Uh... 1058 00:51:11,489 --> 00:51:12,584 Yeah. 1059 00:51:12,990 --> 00:51:15,034 Let's do it. 1060 00:51:19,038 --> 00:51:20,331 Hey! 1061 00:51:25,628 --> 00:51:27,189 How am I supposed to open the door 1062 00:51:27,213 --> 00:51:28,732 - when I don't have any hands? - Yo! 1063 00:51:28,756 --> 00:51:30,025 - What's up, Lip? - My man. 1064 00:51:30,049 --> 00:51:32,801 - Hi! We have arrived! - Hi! What the fuck? 1065 00:51:32,843 --> 00:51:33,719 - Hi. - Yo! Hey. 1066 00:51:33,761 --> 00:51:34,678 - We made it. - Hi. 1067 00:51:36,972 --> 00:51:38,349 Look at you. 1068 00:51:38,390 --> 00:51:39,975 - Check it out. - Wow. Nice. 1069 00:51:40,017 --> 00:51:41,495 Hey, gimme a hammer. I wanna break some shit. 1070 00:51:41,519 --> 00:51:43,270 - You wanna help? - I guess so. 1071 00:51:43,312 --> 00:51:44,313 There you go. 1072 00:51:44,355 --> 00:51:46,398 - Yo. - Yo. 1073 00:51:46,440 --> 00:51:48,442 Hey, you guys talk? 1074 00:51:48,484 --> 00:51:52,112 Uh... sort of. 1075 00:51:52,154 --> 00:51:55,074 - Yeah? - Yeah. We'll figure it out. 1076 00:52:01,504 --> 00:52:02,505 Hey. 1077 00:52:02,680 --> 00:52:05,099 Uh, hey. 1078 00:52:06,001 --> 00:52:07,229 - Everything good? - Yeah, yeah. 1079 00:52:07,253 --> 00:52:10,158 All right. Hey, I wanna show you something. 1080 00:52:10,183 --> 00:52:11,977 Yeah? 1081 00:52:13,592 --> 00:52:15,261 What do you think? 1082 00:52:15,302 --> 00:52:16,887 Uh, it's beautiful. 1083 00:52:17,061 --> 00:52:19,146 Definitely worth the extra money. 1084 00:52:19,473 --> 00:52:20,849 Absolutely. 1085 00:52:20,891 --> 00:52:22,428 Okay, I am starving. 1086 00:52:26,463 --> 00:52:28,215 Hey, Tami. 1087 00:52:29,065 --> 00:52:30,498 Hey. 1088 00:52:31,318 --> 00:52:33,696 Hey, Fran, you wanna help Uncle Carl? 1089 00:52:39,618 --> 00:52:41,787 This is my Chicago, 1090 00:52:41,867 --> 00:52:43,569 the Chicago I love. 1091 00:52:44,206 --> 00:52:45,976 Lip's got a baby now. 1092 00:52:46,834 --> 00:52:49,312 Debbie's got a kid and a rap sheet. 1093 00:52:49,962 --> 00:52:51,797 Carl's gonna be a cop. 1094 00:52:51,822 --> 00:52:53,574 Didn't see that coming. 1095 00:52:54,004 --> 00:52:55,926 Ian's married to a Milkovich. 1096 00:52:55,968 --> 00:52:59,346 Really didn't see that coming. 1097 00:53:00,051 --> 00:53:01,890 Family looking after family. 1098 00:53:01,932 --> 00:53:03,887 That's the South Side way. 1099 00:53:04,143 --> 00:53:05,477 The Gallagher way. 1100 00:53:10,024 --> 00:53:13,785 Yeah, this is our Chicago. 1101 00:53:14,403 --> 00:53:16,449 It's disappearing fast. 1102 00:53:17,497 --> 00:53:19,665 But before it's gone, 1103 00:53:20,067 --> 00:53:23,487 we're gonna enjoy every fuckin' minute of it. 1104 00:53:29,333 --> 00:53:32,075 _ 1105 00:53:43,785 --> 00:53:47,061 Are you Hot Lesbian Convict Lady? 1106 00:53:47,102 --> 00:53:49,813 Would you, um, like to buy some cookies, 1107 00:53:49,855 --> 00:53:52,441 Hot Lesbian Convict Lady? 1108 00:53:52,483 --> 00:53:55,319 I'm only seven. 1109 00:53:58,046 --> 00:54:04,068 CREDITS