1 00:00:11,376 --> 00:00:13,711 Medical schools often ask applicants 2 00:00:13,745 --> 00:00:16,447 for an essay describing a time they faced adversity... 3 00:00:19,117 --> 00:00:20,317 ...and how they overcame it. 4 00:00:22,187 --> 00:00:23,988 They want to know how people will cope 5 00:00:24,022 --> 00:00:26,123 with the challenges they'll face as a doctor. 6 00:00:36,901 --> 00:00:40,170 Some students worry they have nothing to write about. 7 00:00:45,577 --> 00:00:48,479 They haven't faced difficulty. 8 00:01:08,733 --> 00:01:10,234 I didn't have that problem. 9 00:01:12,498 --> 00:01:14,266 Morning, Meredith. 10 00:01:18,476 --> 00:01:25,132 Synced & corrected by -robtor- www.addic7ed.com 11 00:01:25,232 --> 00:01:27,167 Uh, let's start with regional updates. 12 00:01:27,201 --> 00:01:29,135 Uh, Hunt? 13 00:01:29,170 --> 00:01:31,538 Shouldn't we start with an update on Meredith Grey? 14 00:01:31,605 --> 00:01:33,573 Yeah. I mean, has her I.S. improved? 15 00:01:33,607 --> 00:01:35,141 Yeah. Is she on a proning schedule? 16 00:01:35,176 --> 00:01:37,143 People, people. I know we're all concerned, 17 00:01:37,178 --> 00:01:39,045 but Meredith is getting excellent care 18 00:01:39,113 --> 00:01:40,413 from Altman and DeLuca. 19 00:01:40,481 --> 00:01:42,182 She's stable and she's resting. 20 00:01:42,216 --> 00:01:43,883 In the meantime, we have a hospital 21 00:01:43,918 --> 00:01:45,585 full of patients who need us. 22 00:01:45,619 --> 00:01:47,053 Hunt? 23 00:01:47,088 --> 00:01:51,558 Yesterday Seattle reported 345 more cases, 29 deaths. 24 00:01:51,592 --> 00:01:54,227 Test positivity rate has increased to 4.7%, 25 00:01:54,261 --> 00:01:55,995 so we should prepare for more patients. 26 00:01:56,063 --> 00:01:57,030 COVID ICU? 27 00:01:57,064 --> 00:01:58,765 Beds are at 68% capacity. 28 00:01:58,833 --> 00:02:00,266 We'll likely need more by the end of the month. 29 00:02:00,301 --> 00:02:03,436 53 of the 72 ventilators are currently in use. 30 00:02:03,471 --> 00:02:05,839 Are there any cases that warrant discussion? 31 00:02:05,873 --> 00:02:07,540 Hi. Hello. 32 00:02:07,575 --> 00:02:09,743 - I've got one. Me. - K-Koracick? How did you... 33 00:02:09,777 --> 00:02:12,011 I-I've got connections. I'm emeritus chief of chiefs. 34 00:02:12,046 --> 00:02:13,179 That is not a thing. 35 00:02:13,247 --> 00:02:15,215 As I'm sure Hunt gleefully told you, 36 00:02:15,249 --> 00:02:16,583 I tested positive for COVID. 37 00:02:16,617 --> 00:02:18,385 But I think the test was a dud. 38 00:02:18,452 --> 00:02:20,286 Breathing's normal, good heart rate, 39 00:02:20,321 --> 00:02:21,388 singing voice unaffected... 40 00:02:21,455 --> 00:02:23,056 That does not change the rules. 41 00:02:23,090 --> 00:02:25,625 A negative COVID test or a 14-day quarantine. 42 00:02:25,659 --> 00:02:28,128 - You're not even close. - Then send me a new test. 43 00:02:28,195 --> 00:02:30,263 And can you adjust my camera angle? 44 00:02:30,331 --> 00:02:32,699 As lovely as the ceiling is, I... 45 00:02:42,810 --> 00:02:46,279 Did you know that there are murder hornets now? 46 00:02:46,313 --> 00:02:47,981 - What? - Yeah. 47 00:02:48,015 --> 00:02:50,884 As if the COVID outbreak right after my husband dumped me 48 00:02:50,918 --> 00:02:52,419 wasn't bad enough. 49 00:02:52,453 --> 00:02:56,256 I'm gonna go home, crawl into bed before my next shift. 50 00:02:56,290 --> 00:02:58,291 Yeah, I'm done, too. Look, if you don't want to be alone, 51 00:02:58,325 --> 00:02:59,492 you can come hang out at my place. 52 00:02:59,527 --> 00:03:02,228 Um, let me think about the last time I went to your place 53 00:03:02,263 --> 00:03:03,463 and... no. 54 00:03:03,497 --> 00:03:07,267 At least I don't have a resident living on my couch, okay? 55 00:03:07,301 --> 00:03:09,235 I got fancy beer and a negative COVID test. 56 00:03:09,270 --> 00:03:12,172 I guess also April switched Harriett's days on me, but... 57 00:03:12,206 --> 00:03:14,174 Oh, so you're lonely. 58 00:03:14,208 --> 00:03:15,842 Will you just come over, alright? 59 00:03:15,876 --> 00:03:19,379 We can watch TV and, I don't know, order pizza. Or sushi. 60 00:03:19,413 --> 00:03:20,480 Start over. 61 00:03:20,514 --> 00:03:22,225 Friendship reboot. 62 00:03:23,350 --> 00:03:25,185 We're getting both and you're paying. 63 00:03:25,219 --> 00:03:27,353 - Fine. - And no Kenny G! 64 00:03:30,224 --> 00:03:31,591 Hey, buddy. 65 00:03:31,625 --> 00:03:33,726 Yeah. 66 00:03:33,761 --> 00:03:36,196 Just me and you. 67 00:03:38,365 --> 00:03:39,866 This is called a "C" chord. 68 00:03:39,900 --> 00:03:41,601 I'll teach you one day. 69 00:03:42,803 --> 00:03:44,471 Why can't I find gauze in a house 70 00:03:44,505 --> 00:03:46,506 with so many surgeons living in it? 71 00:03:46,540 --> 00:03:48,508 Uh, who's bleeding this time? 72 00:03:48,576 --> 00:03:49,943 Bailey lost a tooth. 73 00:03:49,977 --> 00:03:51,644 The one that's been loose for two weeks? 74 00:03:51,679 --> 00:03:52,879 That's supposed to happen. 75 00:03:52,913 --> 00:03:55,548 Well, not when your mom is in the hospital with COVID. 76 00:03:55,583 --> 00:03:56,783 Mer's gonna get better. 77 00:03:56,851 --> 00:03:58,718 You don't know that's true. 78 00:03:58,752 --> 00:04:01,187 You don't know that it's not. 79 00:04:01,222 --> 00:04:02,322 Alright, look, um, 80 00:04:02,389 --> 00:04:05,391 let's... let's look at the bright side of things, okay? 81 00:04:05,426 --> 00:04:07,427 We get to introduce Bailey to the Tooth Fairy. 82 00:04:07,461 --> 00:04:09,462 Kids love the Tooth Fairy. 83 00:04:09,497 --> 00:04:11,364 I'll, uh... I'll check on him. 84 00:04:13,434 --> 00:04:14,767 The bright side? 85 00:04:17,104 --> 00:04:21,074 Dr. Kuo at the Catherine Fox Medical Center in Manhattan 86 00:04:21,108 --> 00:04:24,244 is doing a trial with monoclonal antibodies for COVID. 87 00:04:24,278 --> 00:04:26,479 She's got room for two more patients, but we got to jump on it. 88 00:04:26,547 --> 00:04:28,414 I read that study. Didn't three patients die? 89 00:04:28,449 --> 00:04:31,150 Well, there's a strong chance that they got the drug too late. 90 00:04:31,218 --> 00:04:32,886 Dr. Webber, her lungs are flooded, 91 00:04:32,953 --> 00:04:35,021 a-and she's sleeping almost around the clock. 92 00:04:35,055 --> 00:04:36,890 Richard, I would never give this recommendation 93 00:04:36,957 --> 00:04:39,025 if I didn't think that the good outweighed the bad. 94 00:04:41,462 --> 00:04:43,730 Thank you. I'll... I'll think about it. 95 00:04:43,764 --> 00:04:45,018 Okay. 96 00:04:45,699 --> 00:04:46,933 Dr. Webber... 97 00:04:46,967 --> 00:04:49,435 I said I'd think about it. 98 00:04:56,310 --> 00:04:59,145 Mom, I can't come see you. 99 00:04:59,179 --> 00:05:01,114 Because of the pandemic, remember? 100 00:05:01,148 --> 00:05:04,284 There's a bad virus and no vaccine yet. 101 00:05:04,351 --> 00:05:06,886 But I can call you later, though, okay? 102 00:05:06,921 --> 00:05:08,555 I... Mnh. 103 00:05:08,622 --> 00:05:10,657 How you feeling, Chief? 104 00:05:10,691 --> 00:05:13,259 I moved my parents here from across the country 105 00:05:13,294 --> 00:05:17,297 into an assisted-living facility just in time to never see them. 106 00:05:17,331 --> 00:05:20,366 I meant your ankle. But sorry to hear that. 107 00:05:20,401 --> 00:05:21,531 It's fine. Thank you. 108 00:05:21,566 --> 00:05:24,074 Hello? Can someone help me? 109 00:05:25,439 --> 00:05:26,606 Hi. I'm Dr. Kim. 110 00:05:30,377 --> 00:05:31,744 Where are you from? 111 00:05:31,779 --> 00:05:34,314 Orthopedics. And it looks like you just have a cut here, 112 00:05:34,381 --> 00:05:35,782 so let's find you another doctor 113 00:05:35,816 --> 00:05:37,884 who can help take care of this, okay? 114 00:05:42,489 --> 00:05:43,923 Orthopedics? 115 00:05:43,958 --> 00:05:45,558 You know that's not what she was asking. 116 00:05:45,593 --> 00:05:47,560 - I know. - It doesn't bother you? 117 00:05:47,595 --> 00:05:49,662 Her assuming you're not from here? 118 00:05:49,697 --> 00:05:51,431 Happens to all of us at some point, right? 119 00:05:53,500 --> 00:05:55,902 - What do we have? - Dave Oyadomari, 37, 120 00:05:55,970 --> 00:05:57,437 head lac and right shoulder pain 121 00:05:57,504 --> 00:05:58,871 after falling off of a step ladder. 122 00:05:58,906 --> 00:06:01,441 He also complains of abdominal pain, nausea, and vomiting 123 00:06:01,475 --> 00:06:02,976 with a 102 fever. 124 00:06:03,010 --> 00:06:05,478 He was recently treated here by Dr. Hunt for appendicitis 125 00:06:05,512 --> 00:06:07,347 then sent home on oral antibiotics. 126 00:06:07,414 --> 00:06:08,581 Yeah. I'll be okay. 127 00:06:08,616 --> 00:06:10,483 Can... Can you just give me some more antibiotics 128 00:06:10,517 --> 00:06:11,918 and... and a sling or something? 129 00:06:11,952 --> 00:06:13,453 You were in so much pain that you fell off a ladder. 130 00:06:13,487 --> 00:06:14,687 I had to call an ambulance! 131 00:06:14,755 --> 00:06:16,022 Meet my wife, Tammi. 132 00:06:16,056 --> 00:06:17,557 Okay. We'll check him out, Tammi. 133 00:06:17,591 --> 00:06:20,326 Uh, he's tachycardic and slightly hypotensive. 134 00:06:20,361 --> 00:06:21,427 Kim. Here. 135 00:06:21,495 --> 00:06:24,464 Let's get him to trauma one and do a COVID test, 136 00:06:24,498 --> 00:06:27,667 STAT X-rays, labs, and a FAST exam. 137 00:06:27,701 --> 00:06:29,535 Got it. 138 00:06:35,509 --> 00:06:37,944 You trying to will her into joining the trial? 139 00:06:37,978 --> 00:06:39,674 No. 140 00:06:40,347 --> 00:06:43,282 I'm hoping she suddenly gets better and doesn't need it. 141 00:07:02,002 --> 00:07:03,903 Excuse me! 142 00:07:09,910 --> 00:07:11,377 Hello?! 143 00:07:20,487 --> 00:07:22,088 Mer? 144 00:07:22,156 --> 00:07:23,885 George?! 145 00:07:24,558 --> 00:07:26,680 What are you doing here? 146 00:07:46,588 --> 00:07:48,556 Did you ask the humans to take you to their leader? 147 00:07:48,590 --> 00:07:49,824 Because it's no longer me. 148 00:07:49,858 --> 00:07:51,859 It's Dr. Helm. I'm here to do your COVID test. 149 00:07:51,894 --> 00:07:53,494 No, you're here to deliver it. 150 00:07:53,529 --> 00:07:55,463 I don't allow residents in my house or up my nose. 151 00:07:55,497 --> 00:07:58,065 - Uh, just put it down. - Right here. 152 00:07:59,768 --> 00:08:01,035 Back up. 153 00:08:01,103 --> 00:08:03,271 Back, back, back, back, back, back, back, back, back, back. 154 00:08:03,305 --> 00:08:05,106 Bup, bup, bup, bup, bup. 155 00:08:15,250 --> 00:08:17,218 Did you know that I had COVID? 156 00:08:17,252 --> 00:08:19,220 It was mild, but scary. 157 00:08:19,254 --> 00:08:21,322 I learned how to make sourdough. 158 00:08:21,356 --> 00:08:25,326 I couldn't taste it or smell it, but the texture seemed right. 159 00:08:25,360 --> 00:08:29,597 I also, uh, binged a docuseries about house... 160 00:08:29,631 --> 00:08:32,066 You can stop your "What I did over COVID vacation" report. 161 00:08:32,100 --> 00:08:33,701 I have no interest in baking, bingeing, 162 00:08:33,735 --> 00:08:35,570 or doing anything you did or will ever do or... 163 00:08:35,604 --> 00:08:36,871 What? 164 00:08:38,207 --> 00:08:41,976 Are you plotting something... evil? 165 00:08:42,044 --> 00:08:44,111 No. I'm stopping the pandemic. 166 00:08:51,453 --> 00:08:56,157 Chopped chicken salad with homemade sweet pickles 167 00:08:56,225 --> 00:08:57,525 on toasted bread. 168 00:08:57,593 --> 00:09:00,094 That's a Nana Ante special right there. 169 00:09:00,128 --> 00:09:02,233 Ooh! Jealous! 170 00:09:02,865 --> 00:09:04,732 I had stale cashews. 171 00:09:04,766 --> 00:09:07,656 Well, mine's nothing compared to hers, but it's not bad. 172 00:09:08,170 --> 00:09:09,871 And I just can't wait for you two to meet. 173 00:09:09,905 --> 00:09:11,105 I hope to, someday. 174 00:09:11,139 --> 00:09:13,274 Tonight too soon? It's her birthday. 175 00:09:13,308 --> 00:09:16,611 And, uh, we're doing a... A virtual dinner. 176 00:09:16,645 --> 00:09:20,281 Or if it's too soon, no rush. 177 00:09:20,315 --> 00:09:23,184 No, no, I just, uh... 178 00:09:23,218 --> 00:09:24,785 It's Meredith. 179 00:09:24,820 --> 00:09:27,188 I-I know there's nothing I can do, but... 180 00:09:27,222 --> 00:09:29,924 Anything I do that isn't trying to help 181 00:09:29,958 --> 00:09:31,726 just feels selfish and wrong. 182 00:09:31,760 --> 00:09:34,795 Joy is in short supply these days. 183 00:09:34,830 --> 00:09:36,364 Especially our joy. 184 00:09:36,398 --> 00:09:37,732 It sure as hell is. 185 00:09:37,766 --> 00:09:39,600 That's why I'm grabbing it when I can. 186 00:09:39,635 --> 00:09:41,535 You know, it might be a text from you. 187 00:09:41,570 --> 00:09:43,271 It might be the fancy pencils 188 00:09:43,305 --> 00:09:45,106 I bought for my crossword puzzles. 189 00:09:45,140 --> 00:09:47,074 It might be just taking a few minutes 190 00:09:47,109 --> 00:09:49,143 to sit outside with my chicken-salad sandwich 191 00:09:49,211 --> 00:09:51,741 and look at the daffodils. 192 00:09:52,814 --> 00:09:54,315 I don't mean to tell you how to be. 193 00:09:54,349 --> 00:09:56,317 Uh... are you mad? 194 00:09:56,385 --> 00:09:57,485 - No, no. - Ignore me. Ignore me. 195 00:09:57,519 --> 00:10:02,423 I'm not mad. I'm not mad. I'm... a little hurt maybe. 196 00:10:02,457 --> 00:10:04,592 You got fancy pencils and you didn't tell me? 197 00:10:04,660 --> 00:10:06,294 Wait. Are you a pencil nerd, too? 198 00:10:06,361 --> 00:10:10,665 Oh, I special ordered a vintage pencil sharpener from Paris. 199 00:10:11,767 --> 00:10:14,135 Oh, oh. That's my resident. 200 00:10:14,169 --> 00:10:15,269 And... joy's over. 201 00:10:15,304 --> 00:10:16,804 Until dinner tonight. 202 00:10:16,872 --> 00:10:18,339 Until dinner tonight. 203 00:10:21,109 --> 00:10:23,177 My great-grandpa was an accountant, 204 00:10:23,211 --> 00:10:26,180 but no one would hire him after he came back from camp. 205 00:10:26,214 --> 00:10:29,951 So he got a job as a line cook in a diner 206 00:10:29,985 --> 00:10:32,386 and eventually started Toyo. 207 00:10:32,421 --> 00:10:34,855 - Where was he interned? - Tule Lake. 208 00:10:34,890 --> 00:10:36,924 My great-grandparents were sent to Jerome. 209 00:10:36,959 --> 00:10:38,359 I'm Gosei on my mom's side. 210 00:10:38,393 --> 00:10:39,727 Scans up yet? 211 00:10:39,761 --> 00:10:41,929 Yep, just came up. 212 00:10:41,964 --> 00:10:43,864 Dr. Hunt, I read 213 00:10:43,899 --> 00:10:46,033 that you initially diagnosed appendicitis, 214 00:10:46,068 --> 00:10:48,002 but these scans show pelvic free fluid 215 00:10:48,036 --> 00:10:49,537 and a paracolonic abscess. 216 00:10:49,571 --> 00:10:52,173 I think he might have right-sided diverticulitis. 217 00:10:52,207 --> 00:10:53,474 Yep. 218 00:10:53,508 --> 00:10:55,376 And it looks like it's perforated. 219 00:10:55,410 --> 00:10:57,345 Plus, his X-rays show a broken collarbone. 220 00:10:57,379 --> 00:10:59,280 Okay, book an OR, and I'll meet you up there. 221 00:10:59,314 --> 00:11:00,815 We need to get him up there right now. 222 00:11:00,849 --> 00:11:02,984 Really? We... We as in me? 223 00:11:03,018 --> 00:11:04,885 Yeah, it's your diagnosis. 224 00:11:04,920 --> 00:11:06,988 Good catch, Tseng. 225 00:11:12,361 --> 00:11:13,861 Congratulations. 226 00:11:13,895 --> 00:11:17,231 You just ordered Nathan Ramos a pregnancy test. 227 00:11:17,265 --> 00:11:19,500 What? How?! 228 00:11:21,403 --> 00:11:23,683 - Hey. - Hey. 229 00:11:24,573 --> 00:11:25,806 Hey. 230 00:11:27,376 --> 00:11:29,377 You already said that. 231 00:11:29,411 --> 00:11:31,645 Portable X-ray to the third floor. 232 00:11:31,680 --> 00:11:33,314 Portable X-ray to the third floor. 233 00:11:33,348 --> 00:11:35,483 Ooh! He cute. 234 00:11:35,517 --> 00:11:37,852 - No one asked you. - Okay. 235 00:11:37,886 --> 00:11:40,054 Wait. No, no, no. Wait. She kicked you out of bed, 236 00:11:40,088 --> 00:11:42,823 - so you were, like, what, naked? - I'm naked. Naked. 237 00:11:42,858 --> 00:11:45,526 I was naked in bed with my boyfriend, and she just... 238 00:11:45,560 --> 00:11:47,395 And it wasn't just one time either. 239 00:11:47,429 --> 00:11:50,164 I mean, it kind of says less about him than her. 240 00:11:50,198 --> 00:11:51,399 Really, though? Does it? 241 00:11:51,433 --> 00:11:53,467 Yeah. Mer's like a force of nature. 242 00:11:54,636 --> 00:11:56,574 Yeah. That's right. 243 00:11:57,239 --> 00:11:59,740 She's a force of nature. She, um... 244 00:12:02,277 --> 00:12:05,413 She's gonna beat this thing. Right? 245 00:12:06,515 --> 00:12:07,915 Right. 246 00:12:07,949 --> 00:12:10,588 Right. Yeah. 247 00:12:18,326 --> 00:12:20,428 Derek said the sand isn't real. 248 00:12:20,462 --> 00:12:22,596 Yeah, no. Neither is the ocean. 249 00:12:22,631 --> 00:12:25,019 It is nice, though. 250 00:12:26,068 --> 00:12:28,736 I wouldn't want to leave either. 251 00:12:28,770 --> 00:12:29,970 The beach? 252 00:12:30,005 --> 00:12:32,373 Your kids. 253 00:12:34,109 --> 00:12:35,776 Got great kids. 254 00:12:35,811 --> 00:12:39,046 They're the best. You didn't meet them. 255 00:12:39,114 --> 00:12:41,411 I check in sometimes. 256 00:12:42,250 --> 00:12:44,552 How did you get older? 257 00:12:44,586 --> 00:12:47,221 Sand isn't real, the ocean isn't real. 258 00:12:47,289 --> 00:12:50,091 The body... it's not real. 259 00:12:51,426 --> 00:12:55,663 Maybe it's just more peaceful for you to imagine me older? 260 00:12:55,697 --> 00:12:58,432 You sound like a fortune cookie. 261 00:13:09,511 --> 00:13:11,545 Do I choose? 262 00:13:11,580 --> 00:13:14,782 Do I get to decide if I go back? 263 00:13:14,816 --> 00:13:17,551 I don't know. I didn't. 264 00:13:19,688 --> 00:13:23,757 I would have stayed if I could have. 265 00:13:23,825 --> 00:13:26,193 It's different for everyone, though. 266 00:13:38,106 --> 00:13:39,373 She's still asleep? 267 00:13:39,441 --> 00:13:41,008 She needs her rest. 268 00:13:41,042 --> 00:13:43,110 You want to wake her and ask her about the trial? 269 00:13:43,145 --> 00:13:45,446 - I tried. - How hard? 270 00:13:46,815 --> 00:13:48,382 She needs her rest, Bailey. 271 00:13:48,416 --> 00:13:50,551 If you think I'm struggling with the decision, 272 00:13:50,619 --> 00:13:52,453 how do you think she's gonna do? 273 00:13:54,756 --> 00:13:57,825 You want to talk pros and cons? 274 00:13:57,859 --> 00:13:59,994 We don't know anything about the virus, 275 00:14:00,028 --> 00:14:02,396 so we don't know anything about the treatment, 276 00:14:02,430 --> 00:14:06,534 so we don't know any of the pros or any of the cons. 277 00:14:06,568 --> 00:14:09,537 Let's just see if the proning helps. 278 00:14:17,552 --> 00:14:21,152 The boy refused to wear anything with buttons. 279 00:14:21,176 --> 00:14:24,278 Collared shirts, slacks, even jeans. 280 00:14:24,313 --> 00:14:26,481 Look. Buttons confine, okay? 281 00:14:26,548 --> 00:14:29,384 Now, elastic waistbands give you freedom. 282 00:14:29,451 --> 00:14:31,486 You better not be wearing elastic waistbands 283 00:14:31,520 --> 00:14:32,787 when you take Maggie out. 284 00:14:32,821 --> 00:14:34,322 I promise you he doesn't. 285 00:14:34,356 --> 00:14:36,457 Oh, is this your brother? 286 00:14:36,492 --> 00:14:37,659 He said he had to work. 287 00:14:37,726 --> 00:14:38,826 Happy Birthday, Momma! 288 00:14:38,861 --> 00:14:40,128 Thanks, baby. 289 00:14:40,162 --> 00:14:41,329 We're actually in the middle of dinner. 290 00:14:41,397 --> 00:14:43,264 Winston, I invited your dad. 291 00:14:43,298 --> 00:14:45,900 And you have to get along because it's my birthday. 292 00:14:45,934 --> 00:14:48,169 So, who is this young lady? 293 00:14:48,203 --> 00:14:51,039 Um, I'm Maggie Pierce. I'm a friend of Winston's. 294 00:14:51,073 --> 00:14:52,306 Friend? Ha. 295 00:14:52,341 --> 00:14:55,176 Maggie's a genius doctor like Winston. 296 00:14:55,210 --> 00:14:56,344 She used to be his teacher. 297 00:14:56,378 --> 00:14:58,212 Winston? A genius? 298 00:14:58,247 --> 00:15:00,081 Oh, stop playin'. 299 00:15:00,149 --> 00:15:03,251 You know that boy almost failed sixth grade. 300 00:15:03,285 --> 00:15:04,619 Such a pain. 301 00:15:04,653 --> 00:15:06,320 Maybe I wouldn't have missed so much class 302 00:15:06,355 --> 00:15:09,223 if I wasn't helping Mom while you gambled away our savings. 303 00:15:09,258 --> 00:15:11,329 - Winston! - Sorry, Nana. No disrespect. 304 00:15:11,353 --> 00:15:14,989 Listen, man, I never pretended to be a perfect man. 305 00:15:15,023 --> 00:15:18,059 But I love you, and I love my momma. 306 00:15:18,093 --> 00:15:23,097 So, please, for her sake, let's try to be civil. 307 00:15:23,131 --> 00:15:24,565 Civil, huh? 308 00:15:26,502 --> 00:15:27,635 Okay. 309 00:15:30,038 --> 00:15:32,640 Happy birthday, Nana. I love you. 310 00:15:33,542 --> 00:15:34,809 Uh... 311 00:15:38,146 --> 00:15:40,748 So, is there cake? 312 00:15:44,186 --> 00:15:46,120 Why are you up so early? 313 00:15:46,154 --> 00:15:48,523 Front desk. I got some breakfast delivered. 314 00:15:48,557 --> 00:15:49,824 Oh, you know what? 315 00:15:49,892 --> 00:15:51,459 If I was hungry, I would have just eaten the cold pizza. 316 00:15:51,493 --> 00:15:53,661 Who said I got you any? 317 00:15:53,729 --> 00:15:55,863 Can't believe I fell asleep. 318 00:15:55,898 --> 00:15:58,666 Never should've started a movie with two sequels. 319 00:15:58,700 --> 00:16:00,134 Prequels. They were prequels. 320 00:16:00,168 --> 00:16:02,803 And I said that, but you called me a wuss. 321 00:16:02,838 --> 00:16:04,305 Why is your couch 322 00:16:04,339 --> 00:16:05,706 more comfortable than my bed? 323 00:16:05,741 --> 00:16:09,176 Well, you're welcome to it whenever you want. 324 00:16:09,211 --> 00:16:14,148 Thank you for the friendship reboot. 325 00:16:14,216 --> 00:16:17,051 It almost made up for the last time that I woke up here. 326 00:16:17,085 --> 00:16:18,553 Tried to rip the Band-Aid off too soon. 327 00:16:18,587 --> 00:16:19,854 It's behind us. We're good. 328 00:16:19,922 --> 00:16:21,489 Uh, but you can take the pizza with you. 329 00:16:21,557 --> 00:16:22,857 I'll grab it for you. 330 00:16:24,426 --> 00:16:26,160 Wait. 331 00:16:29,031 --> 00:16:30,064 Mnh, mnh, mnh. 332 00:16:30,098 --> 00:16:31,866 I'm ripping off the Band-Aid. 333 00:16:44,112 --> 00:16:48,249 It's just a basic algorithm that simulates the spread of COVID. 334 00:16:48,283 --> 00:16:51,218 Here's what it would look like if everyone social-distanced. 335 00:16:54,990 --> 00:16:57,925 Here... if everyone wore face masks. 336 00:17:00,329 --> 00:17:02,597 It's just a little stochastic S-I-R model 337 00:17:02,631 --> 00:17:05,066 that allows for multivariable inputs... 338 00:17:06,301 --> 00:17:09,236 ...w-which I built by converting a "Zombie Apocalypse" game. 339 00:17:09,271 --> 00:17:11,339 I love that game! How does yours end? 340 00:17:11,373 --> 00:17:12,573 I-I don't know yet. 341 00:17:12,608 --> 00:17:14,942 Same. I never got past level eight, so... 342 00:17:14,977 --> 00:17:16,577 Yeah, Helm, I appreciate your interest, 343 00:17:16,612 --> 00:17:18,245 but, uh, no one's gonna know my test is negative 344 00:17:18,280 --> 00:17:20,247 if it never leaves my porch, hmm? 345 00:17:20,282 --> 00:17:22,049 Show's over. 346 00:17:22,084 --> 00:17:23,651 Bye-ee! 347 00:17:27,856 --> 00:17:30,358 I was devastated when you died. 348 00:17:30,392 --> 00:17:33,227 You were all cracking up at my funeral. 349 00:17:35,197 --> 00:17:36,731 Well, we were... 350 00:17:36,765 --> 00:17:37,832 No. What? 351 00:17:37,866 --> 00:17:40,134 What? No. 352 00:17:40,168 --> 00:17:43,204 It... That made me happy. 353 00:17:46,108 --> 00:17:48,242 I was devastated. 354 00:17:48,276 --> 00:17:52,279 And then I was okay. 355 00:17:52,347 --> 00:17:54,815 And even with Derek... 356 00:17:54,850 --> 00:17:58,486 eventually you go on. 357 00:17:58,520 --> 00:18:01,397 And the kids would go on. 358 00:18:01,990 --> 00:18:03,774 They would, but... 359 00:18:04,326 --> 00:18:07,828 I think maybe with them it's different. 360 00:18:07,863 --> 00:18:09,230 My mom didn't go on. 361 00:18:09,264 --> 00:18:10,631 No? 362 00:18:10,666 --> 00:18:13,117 Not really, not like she used to. 363 00:18:14,136 --> 00:18:16,454 Some grief is... 364 00:18:17,039 --> 00:18:19,558 Is heavier than other grief. 365 00:18:19,621 --> 00:18:21,275 Sometimes it moves through you, 366 00:18:21,309 --> 00:18:24,629 and sometimes it... It just gets stuck. 367 00:18:25,013 --> 00:18:27,507 And you carry it. Like my mom. 368 00:18:28,383 --> 00:18:30,217 My mom carries it. 369 00:18:31,887 --> 00:18:34,514 Sometimes I try to shake it out of her. 370 00:18:35,857 --> 00:18:37,350 What?! 371 00:18:37,859 --> 00:18:39,293 Like, you know... 372 00:18:39,361 --> 00:18:40,661 Like you haunt her? 373 00:18:40,729 --> 00:18:42,430 Well, I mean, if you want to call it that, I... 374 00:18:45,233 --> 00:18:48,703 I just want her to... let it go. 375 00:18:48,737 --> 00:18:50,471 I want her to know I'm still me 376 00:18:50,539 --> 00:18:53,941 even though she can't touch me and she can't see me, 377 00:18:53,975 --> 00:18:56,277 but I am still me. 378 00:18:56,344 --> 00:18:57,945 It's not the same. 379 00:18:57,979 --> 00:18:59,413 No, I know. 380 00:19:09,591 --> 00:19:11,025 You know, her sats were steady, 381 00:19:11,059 --> 00:19:12,393 but now they're just getting worse. 382 00:19:12,427 --> 00:19:14,328 I made some calls, and there's another spot open 383 00:19:14,362 --> 00:19:16,630 in Dr. Kuo's trial, but we have to act fast. 384 00:19:16,665 --> 00:19:20,201 Is there another spot because another patient died? 385 00:19:23,605 --> 00:19:25,506 Have you seen the opacities in her lungs? 386 00:19:25,540 --> 00:19:26,974 Dr. Webber, at this point, 387 00:19:27,008 --> 00:19:29,009 you can either hope that she wakes up again 388 00:19:29,044 --> 00:19:32,680 or you can make the decisions that she chose you to make! 389 00:19:32,714 --> 00:19:34,415 I beg your pardon? 390 00:19:34,483 --> 00:19:38,219 The choice is between doing nothing and doing something. 391 00:19:40,655 --> 00:19:42,590 Do something. 392 00:19:52,004 --> 00:19:53,383 - You had to leave him open? - Yes. 393 00:19:53,417 --> 00:19:55,376 Once we got in, his colon was a mess. 394 00:19:55,401 --> 00:19:57,373 So we had to bring up an ileostomy 395 00:19:57,409 --> 00:19:59,562 and place an ABTHERA for the swelling. 396 00:19:59,589 --> 00:20:01,123 His clavicle's non-displaced. 397 00:20:01,157 --> 00:20:02,825 Fracture should heal quite nicely. 398 00:20:02,892 --> 00:20:04,460 - How soon? - Till he can work again? 399 00:20:04,494 --> 00:20:05,694 Maybe a month. 400 00:20:05,729 --> 00:20:07,129 Tseng, let's diurese him overnight 401 00:20:07,163 --> 00:20:08,897 and let's put him on the stand-by list for the OR 402 00:20:08,932 --> 00:20:10,860 in case we need to do a washout tomorrow. 403 00:20:11,434 --> 00:20:13,002 You did well today. 404 00:20:17,374 --> 00:20:18,674 Can I ask you something? 405 00:20:18,708 --> 00:20:20,743 Am I literally the only person that can answer it? 406 00:20:20,777 --> 00:20:23,178 Kind of. 407 00:20:23,213 --> 00:20:25,881 Our patient's Asian-American. 408 00:20:25,915 --> 00:20:29,018 So right-side diverticulitis was a greater possibility. 409 00:20:29,085 --> 00:20:31,820 But Dr. Hunt didn't scan him when he first came in. 410 00:20:31,855 --> 00:20:33,722 So, what's your question? 411 00:20:33,757 --> 00:20:36,258 I think he should know so he doesn't make this mistake again. 412 00:20:36,293 --> 00:20:37,793 But I don't know how to talk to him about it. 413 00:20:37,827 --> 00:20:39,862 You don't know how to accuse your attending of being a racist? 414 00:20:39,896 --> 00:20:42,331 - That's not what I meant. - Well, that's what he's gonna hear. 415 00:20:42,399 --> 00:20:45,701 So your advice is... do nothing? 416 00:20:47,637 --> 00:20:50,069 You're a resident. He's an attending. 417 00:20:50,106 --> 00:20:52,041 My advice to you is, if you're gonna have a conversation 418 00:20:52,075 --> 00:20:54,677 with him, at least know what to expect. 419 00:21:01,851 --> 00:21:04,186 Hello! Dr. Koracick? 420 00:21:11,227 --> 00:21:13,228 - No test kit? - They wouldn't give me another one 421 00:21:13,263 --> 00:21:14,897 because you keep testing positive. 422 00:21:14,931 --> 00:21:17,633 But I got to level nine on "Zombie Apocalypse." 423 00:21:17,667 --> 00:21:19,702 I didn't stop the virus, but it's a start. 424 00:21:19,769 --> 00:21:21,070 Oh, yeah, I-I stopped that. 425 00:21:21,137 --> 00:21:23,372 You found a cure? Or a vaccine? 426 00:21:23,440 --> 00:21:27,476 Wait. Did you reach herd immunity? 427 00:21:27,544 --> 00:21:29,845 Tell me. 428 00:21:29,879 --> 00:21:30,879 I blew up the world. 429 00:21:30,947 --> 00:21:32,081 You killed everyone? 430 00:21:32,148 --> 00:21:33,949 Oh, we're all gonna die anyway. 431 00:21:34,017 --> 00:21:35,784 Well, yeah, eventually. 432 00:21:35,819 --> 00:21:37,986 Well, if by "eventually" you mean before the year's out, then, yeah. 433 00:21:38,021 --> 00:21:40,923 I figured I'd cut to the chase. 434 00:21:47,630 --> 00:21:50,666 That was not a bridge. 435 00:21:50,700 --> 00:21:53,936 That was... What's bigger than a bridge? 436 00:21:53,970 --> 00:21:57,005 Mm, whatever that was, I guess. 437 00:21:57,040 --> 00:21:59,174 Okay. But we can't do it again. 438 00:21:59,209 --> 00:22:01,122 - No? - No. Definitely not. 439 00:22:01,190 --> 00:22:02,631 Because then... Then we're a thing. 440 00:22:02,696 --> 00:22:03,886 We're definitely not a thing. 441 00:22:03,923 --> 00:22:04,847 Yeah, definitely not a thing. 442 00:22:04,881 --> 00:22:06,014 - Agreed. - Not a thing. 443 00:22:06,049 --> 00:22:08,083 - It's just... However... - Yeah? 444 00:22:08,151 --> 00:22:11,053 ...if we were to not get dressed 445 00:22:11,087 --> 00:22:14,022 between the first and the... 446 00:22:14,057 --> 00:22:16,592 Yep. Yeah, mm-hmm. You know what I'm saying? 447 00:22:16,626 --> 00:22:18,389 Then it's all really just one experience. 448 00:22:18,413 --> 00:22:19,655 It's just one experience. 449 00:22:19,700 --> 00:22:21,463 So it's not a thing. It's just... It's one whole experience. 450 00:22:24,868 --> 00:22:28,510 - So... he just bailed? - Yeah. 451 00:22:28,534 --> 00:22:30,873 I knew that he had problems with his dad, 452 00:22:30,940 --> 00:22:33,108 but I did not know they were that bad. 453 00:22:33,143 --> 00:22:34,877 Couldn't even be in a virtual room with him. 454 00:22:34,944 --> 00:22:36,478 And I haven't heard from him since. 455 00:22:36,513 --> 00:22:38,680 You seem exceedingly calm about that. 456 00:22:38,715 --> 00:22:40,849 You know, I'm... I'm paying it forward. 457 00:22:40,917 --> 00:22:42,618 Or... backward. 458 00:22:42,652 --> 00:22:44,586 When we first reconnected in L.A., 459 00:22:44,621 --> 00:22:48,257 I told him that I needed some time, and he totally heard me. 460 00:22:48,291 --> 00:22:52,528 Plus, our sister's in the hospital with COVID alone. 461 00:22:52,562 --> 00:22:54,997 It really puts things in perspective. 462 00:22:57,300 --> 00:22:59,001 I hate that we can't be with her. 463 00:22:59,035 --> 00:23:00,302 Me too. 464 00:23:04,808 --> 00:23:06,809 Is that whistling? 465 00:23:06,843 --> 00:23:08,410 That's Link. 466 00:23:08,478 --> 00:23:12,014 He is a one-man pep rally. 467 00:23:12,048 --> 00:23:13,849 And I hate that, too. 468 00:23:16,586 --> 00:23:19,154 Oh! Dr. Altman. 469 00:23:19,189 --> 00:23:20,589 Bad time? 470 00:23:20,623 --> 00:23:22,724 This virus is like aa drunk uncle at a wedding. 471 00:23:22,759 --> 00:23:24,393 Y-You've got no idea what it's gonna do 472 00:23:24,427 --> 00:23:25,994 or when it's gonna turn on you. 473 00:23:26,062 --> 00:23:27,863 I am reading everything on COVID 474 00:23:27,897 --> 00:23:30,065 because every 24 hours there's something new. 475 00:23:30,099 --> 00:23:32,034 And I have to keep up because there could be one drug, 476 00:23:32,068 --> 00:23:33,569 one procedure... It could help. 477 00:23:33,603 --> 00:23:35,103 It could help everyone. It could help Meredith Grey. 478 00:23:35,138 --> 00:23:37,039 So, yes, it's a... it's a... It's a bad time. 479 00:23:40,043 --> 00:23:41,276 What do you need? 480 00:23:41,344 --> 00:23:42,744 Um, I was gonna tell you 481 00:23:42,779 --> 00:23:45,848 that Dr. Koracick is in a really dark place 482 00:23:45,915 --> 00:23:47,850 and seems like he could use a friend. 483 00:23:47,917 --> 00:23:52,254 But, um, Dr. Grey is kinda my whole world, so... 484 00:23:52,288 --> 00:23:54,223 Never mind. Proceed. 485 00:23:58,127 --> 00:24:00,729 Dave's abdominal swelling is coming down, 486 00:24:00,797 --> 00:24:03,432 so we should be able to close him in just a few days. 487 00:24:03,466 --> 00:24:05,467 Oh, that's great news. Thank you. 488 00:24:05,502 --> 00:24:07,870 Yeah. Just doing my job. How are things there? 489 00:24:07,937 --> 00:24:09,443 Oh, hanging on by a thread. 490 00:24:09,478 --> 00:24:10,973 Dave's the one who keeps this place running. 491 00:24:11,007 --> 00:24:12,574 Well, we are doing everything we can here 492 00:24:12,609 --> 00:24:13,775 to get him back to you, okay? 493 00:24:13,843 --> 00:24:15,978 - Can I see him one more time? - Of course. 494 00:24:16,012 --> 00:24:17,880 Rest up and come home soon, okay? 495 00:24:17,947 --> 00:24:20,449 I wish I could be there. I love you. 496 00:24:22,090 --> 00:24:23,485 It's awful that she can't visit. 497 00:24:23,520 --> 00:24:25,787 It's awful this happened in the first place. 498 00:24:27,657 --> 00:24:29,091 Tseng, you need to step out. 499 00:24:31,698 --> 00:24:32,995 Now. 500 00:24:39,636 --> 00:24:41,436 You don't have to be so hard on her. 501 00:24:41,504 --> 00:24:43,238 She's very attached to this patient. 502 00:24:43,273 --> 00:24:45,073 She's upset that a misdiagnosis 503 00:24:45,108 --> 00:24:47,309 cost this patient the next four weeks of his livelihood. 504 00:24:47,377 --> 00:24:49,945 Me too. Sometimes you have to weigh the risks and make a decision. 505 00:24:49,979 --> 00:24:52,180 Right-sided diverticulitis is extremely rare. 506 00:24:52,248 --> 00:24:54,316 But not as rare for Dave. It's 10 times more likely 507 00:24:54,384 --> 00:24:56,685 in patients of Asian descent than white patients. 508 00:24:56,719 --> 00:24:59,288 Which you clearly didn't know or didn't take into consideration. 509 00:24:59,322 --> 00:25:00,822 But either way it's on you, 510 00:25:00,857 --> 00:25:03,458 'cause all this could've been avoided with a simple scan. 511 00:25:16,339 --> 00:25:17,872 You're just getting here? 512 00:25:17,907 --> 00:25:19,941 Is that a problem? 513 00:25:19,975 --> 00:25:22,343 No. Just didn't see you when I got up. 514 00:25:22,411 --> 00:25:24,445 I figured you came in early. 515 00:25:24,480 --> 00:25:26,581 I was exercising. 516 00:25:28,250 --> 00:25:29,484 Morning. 517 00:25:30,719 --> 00:25:33,187 Oh, my God! You're back together. 518 00:25:33,255 --> 00:25:34,389 - Kind of. - Ugh! 519 00:25:34,423 --> 00:25:36,408 Taryn said the Netherlands 520 00:25:36,433 --> 00:25:39,235 suggested people find a designated sex partner 521 00:25:39,269 --> 00:25:40,436 for the pandemic. 522 00:25:40,470 --> 00:25:41,904 You're having sex with Nico 523 00:25:41,938 --> 00:25:44,039 because the Dutch government recommends it? 524 00:25:44,074 --> 00:25:47,009 Their country ranks very high on the World Happiness Index. 525 00:25:47,043 --> 00:25:48,844 He lied, dumped you. 526 00:25:48,879 --> 00:25:51,046 - He barely gives you the time of day. - Okay, stop judging. 527 00:25:51,114 --> 00:25:53,249 It's wartime, but I still have needs. 528 00:25:53,283 --> 00:25:55,885 It's not like I'm just gonna find someone new. 529 00:25:55,919 --> 00:25:58,187 So you're with your emotionally unavailable ex? 530 00:25:58,221 --> 00:25:59,388 Wartime! 531 00:26:00,924 --> 00:26:05,094 Ah, the sun is out, and Scout's down. 532 00:26:05,128 --> 00:26:10,232 And everyone else is watching a PBS show about penguins. 533 00:26:10,267 --> 00:26:13,602 Meredith's not improving. Uh, they can't wake her. 534 00:26:13,637 --> 00:26:15,638 Well, she's getting her rest. It's good. 535 00:26:15,672 --> 00:26:17,940 No, it is not good. None of this is good, okay? 536 00:26:18,008 --> 00:26:20,476 Do you not see that? I am terrified for Meredith. 537 00:26:20,510 --> 00:26:23,779 I am sad. I am enraged that this is happening. 538 00:26:23,814 --> 00:26:26,282 So, please, stop dismissing me 539 00:26:26,316 --> 00:26:28,918 with your bright sides and your pep talks, okay? 540 00:26:28,952 --> 00:26:31,821 Let me have my fear and my grief 541 00:26:31,855 --> 00:26:33,088 and my anger. 542 00:26:33,123 --> 00:26:37,459 Because if I don't, if I keep shoving it down, 543 00:26:37,494 --> 00:26:39,829 you will have a very hard time 544 00:26:39,863 --> 00:26:42,631 finding the bright side to the consequences. 545 00:26:59,649 --> 00:27:00,983 What are you doing? 546 00:27:05,522 --> 00:27:08,924 I'm making some space for us to sit 547 00:27:08,959 --> 00:27:13,662 while you have all your feelings. 548 00:27:47,030 --> 00:27:49,064 Do you still dance? 549 00:27:49,132 --> 00:27:50,232 Hmm? 550 00:27:50,267 --> 00:27:51,867 When you're sad or you're stressed, 551 00:27:51,902 --> 00:27:54,837 do you still... dance it out? 552 00:27:54,871 --> 00:28:00,309 No, not so much anymore, not since Cristina left. 553 00:28:00,343 --> 00:28:02,912 Cristina didn't die. 554 00:28:02,946 --> 00:28:04,847 I know. 555 00:28:06,016 --> 00:28:09,485 That's what I miss about being alive. 556 00:28:09,519 --> 00:28:13,222 Dancing till you drop. 557 00:28:13,290 --> 00:28:16,592 Laughing till you cry. 558 00:28:16,626 --> 00:28:19,428 Food. Textures. 559 00:28:19,462 --> 00:28:21,830 The crunch of cereal as you eat it from the box. 560 00:28:23,934 --> 00:28:26,769 The feel of clean sheets and a good pillow 561 00:28:26,803 --> 00:28:28,370 at the end of a long day. 562 00:28:32,976 --> 00:28:36,045 I've got the consent forms for that clinical trial... 563 00:28:36,079 --> 00:28:37,546 ...for that clinical trial... 564 00:28:41,284 --> 00:28:44,086 And there's one more space, and... 565 00:28:44,120 --> 00:28:46,655 I have to decide, and... 566 00:28:46,690 --> 00:28:50,225 it could be the best or worst decision of my life. 567 00:28:50,260 --> 00:28:54,196 Your doctors, your friends, your family. 568 00:28:54,230 --> 00:28:55,931 They're worried about you. 569 00:28:55,966 --> 00:28:57,766 I'm trying to be strong for them, 570 00:28:57,834 --> 00:29:01,236 but I'll admit... I'm struggling. 571 00:29:02,439 --> 00:29:04,406 Seeing you there like this... 572 00:29:04,441 --> 00:29:06,875 and not knowing what to do. 573 00:29:09,179 --> 00:29:11,775 I'm sorry, Richard. 574 00:29:12,349 --> 00:29:15,384 And choices. Ahh. 575 00:29:15,418 --> 00:29:17,453 So many choices. 576 00:29:17,487 --> 00:29:20,823 So many ways to live a life. 577 00:29:20,857 --> 00:29:22,224 Meredith? 578 00:29:22,258 --> 00:29:25,294 Meredith, what is it? I'm here. 579 00:29:25,328 --> 00:29:26,795 I'm right here. 580 00:29:31,434 --> 00:29:34,003 If you stay here, it might break him. 581 00:29:38,575 --> 00:29:39,908 I know. 582 00:29:44,280 --> 00:29:47,016 I know, George. 583 00:30:02,532 --> 00:30:03,799 Get her in. 584 00:30:19,191 --> 00:30:21,960 Oh, God, I hate... 585 00:30:23,562 --> 00:30:24,762 Me? 586 00:30:24,797 --> 00:30:26,898 Every single thing except you. 587 00:30:33,539 --> 00:30:35,506 I live with Jo Wilson now. 588 00:30:35,541 --> 00:30:37,075 But she, uh... 589 00:30:37,109 --> 00:30:40,645 has not been sleeping at home. 590 00:30:40,713 --> 00:30:42,680 I want to invite you over. 591 00:30:42,715 --> 00:30:48,052 But I guess we have not been great to each other. 592 00:30:48,087 --> 00:30:51,458 And I don't know what's really changed. 593 00:30:52,358 --> 00:30:54,086 Levi. 594 00:30:54,827 --> 00:30:58,029 There's a worldwide pandemic. 595 00:30:58,063 --> 00:31:01,199 We literally don't know if we're gonna live to see tomorrow. 596 00:31:01,233 --> 00:31:03,501 A lot has changed. 597 00:31:08,207 --> 00:31:10,018 Yeah, okay, let's go. 598 00:31:21,520 --> 00:31:22,887 - Hey. - Hey. 599 00:31:22,955 --> 00:31:24,522 Um... 600 00:31:24,556 --> 00:31:26,557 Our plan went to crap, 601 00:31:26,592 --> 00:31:28,626 and now we can't pretend it didn't happen... 602 00:31:28,661 --> 00:31:30,061 I can't be in a relationship right now. 603 00:31:30,129 --> 00:31:31,996 - What? - Sorry. 604 00:31:32,031 --> 00:31:34,165 Let me start over. That sounded rude. 605 00:31:34,199 --> 00:31:38,136 When I'm saying is, I-I jumped right into something with Vic... 606 00:31:38,170 --> 00:31:40,171 ...you know, after breaking up with Maggie, 607 00:31:40,205 --> 00:31:43,608 who I started dating pretty soon after April. 608 00:31:43,642 --> 00:31:46,744 So I just probably should take some time to sort things out. 609 00:31:46,779 --> 00:31:51,449 I don't want to do anything to hurt you or our friendship. 610 00:31:51,483 --> 00:31:57,422 Jackson, my husband left me the same year that we got married, 611 00:31:57,456 --> 00:31:59,223 for a second time. 612 00:31:59,258 --> 00:32:00,758 I am super broken. 613 00:32:00,793 --> 00:32:03,661 Like "virtual therapy three times a week" broken. 614 00:32:03,696 --> 00:32:05,997 And now I have to put myself back together 615 00:32:06,031 --> 00:32:08,433 in a world that I no longer recognize, 616 00:32:08,467 --> 00:32:11,836 one that is sad and lonely and depressing. 617 00:32:11,870 --> 00:32:16,107 So what I need is friendship and sex. 618 00:32:16,141 --> 00:32:21,612 I am not, like really not, looking for a relationship. 619 00:32:21,647 --> 00:32:23,881 Especially with someone like you. 620 00:32:23,916 --> 00:32:26,250 - Someone like me? Okay. - Mm-hmm. 621 00:32:26,285 --> 00:32:28,753 Yeah, you know, Mr., um, Can't Be Alone 622 00:32:28,787 --> 00:32:31,989 But Sometimes Skips Town To Go On Nature Journeys. 623 00:32:32,024 --> 00:32:33,524 - No thanks. No. - Oh, okay. 624 00:32:33,592 --> 00:32:34,759 But you can be friends with 625 00:32:34,793 --> 00:32:37,628 and have sex with Mr. Can't Be Alone? 626 00:32:37,663 --> 00:32:39,397 - Got it. - Yes. 627 00:32:39,431 --> 00:32:42,433 The Netherlands has recommended 628 00:32:42,468 --> 00:32:46,404 that its residents find a regular sex buddy 629 00:32:46,438 --> 00:32:49,140 during the pandemic for safety. 630 00:32:49,174 --> 00:32:50,608 - Sounds wise. - Doesn't it? 631 00:32:52,411 --> 00:32:54,812 You thought I wanted to date you?! 632 00:32:54,847 --> 00:32:57,281 Well, how is that... Why is that so funny? 633 00:33:04,790 --> 00:33:06,290 Hey. Uh... 634 00:33:06,325 --> 00:33:09,026 You mind if I, uh... 635 00:33:09,061 --> 00:33:11,796 Okay, well, sit over there. 636 00:33:18,303 --> 00:33:20,438 Okay. Hypothetical. 637 00:33:20,472 --> 00:33:23,107 Asian-American male presents with fever, 638 00:33:23,142 --> 00:33:26,177 high white blood cell count, and right lower quadrant pain. 639 00:33:26,211 --> 00:33:28,179 Oh, is this the restaurant guy? 640 00:33:28,213 --> 00:33:29,680 I caught him in the ER. 641 00:33:29,715 --> 00:33:32,316 Bailey, I see a dozen presentations like that a month. 642 00:33:32,351 --> 00:33:33,918 All appendicitis. 643 00:33:33,952 --> 00:33:36,154 But if I'm honest, in that moment, 644 00:33:36,188 --> 00:33:37,822 I-I didn't give it much thought. 645 00:33:37,856 --> 00:33:40,758 I just... He was... He was any patient. 646 00:33:40,793 --> 00:33:42,760 Any non-Asian patient. 647 00:33:42,795 --> 00:33:44,796 I defaulted to a standard of care. 648 00:33:44,863 --> 00:33:47,665 That's centered around white patients. 649 00:33:50,669 --> 00:33:53,738 I never want to make that mistake again. 650 00:33:53,772 --> 00:33:55,232 There is no excuse. 651 00:33:55,302 --> 00:33:57,275 You know, when you're dealing with a high patient count, 652 00:33:57,309 --> 00:33:59,710 you have to make judgment calls, you know? 653 00:33:59,745 --> 00:34:02,947 You... You have to ask, what is the most likely problem, right? 654 00:34:02,981 --> 00:34:04,682 So there's no excuses, 655 00:34:04,750 --> 00:34:06,717 other than the excuses you just listed off? 656 00:34:06,752 --> 00:34:08,419 That's not what I meant. 657 00:34:08,453 --> 00:34:09,453 Ha! 658 00:34:09,521 --> 00:34:12,323 I just want to treat everyone equally. 659 00:34:12,357 --> 00:34:15,560 Equal doesn't work for everybody, Hunt. 660 00:34:15,594 --> 00:34:18,830 I-It's about equity... Patients getting what they need, 661 00:34:18,864 --> 00:34:21,299 whether it fits into a protocol or not. 662 00:34:21,333 --> 00:34:24,969 Look, I just put my parents in assisted living, 663 00:34:25,003 --> 00:34:28,973 and I can't stop worrying that they won't get enough care 664 00:34:29,007 --> 00:34:33,010 because... there are so few Black folks there. 665 00:34:33,078 --> 00:34:35,847 Meanwhile, my dad's freaked out 666 00:34:35,881 --> 00:34:38,983 because on his floor the nurses are male. 667 00:34:39,051 --> 00:34:42,587 In his mind, good nurses are female, period. 668 00:34:42,621 --> 00:34:46,924 So we all have biases, Hunt, including you. 669 00:34:46,992 --> 00:34:49,894 What matters now is what you do about it. 670 00:34:49,928 --> 00:34:51,762 You're the chief of trauma. 671 00:34:51,797 --> 00:34:53,564 If the protocols don't work, 672 00:34:53,599 --> 00:34:56,745 then read, learn... 673 00:34:57,202 --> 00:35:00,371 question... and change them. 674 00:35:09,681 --> 00:35:10,948 Kids are asleep. 675 00:35:18,757 --> 00:35:22,521 And... it's your turn to talk. 676 00:35:23,061 --> 00:35:24,428 I'm good. 677 00:35:26,765 --> 00:35:30,167 Link, everything sucks right now. You can talk about it. 678 00:35:30,202 --> 00:35:31,702 Yeah. Yeah. I could do that. 679 00:35:31,770 --> 00:35:35,406 If you want me to be... miserable and resentful. 680 00:35:35,440 --> 00:35:37,275 Resentful of me? 681 00:35:37,309 --> 00:35:39,076 For trying to listen? 682 00:35:39,111 --> 00:35:40,578 No, of making me talk 683 00:35:40,612 --> 00:35:44,248 when clearly all I want to do is play my damn guitar. 684 00:35:45,918 --> 00:35:47,285 You can't keep everything bottled up. 685 00:35:47,319 --> 00:35:48,753 No, no, you can't, Amelia. 686 00:35:48,820 --> 00:35:50,421 That's how you process feelings. 687 00:35:50,455 --> 00:35:52,924 That's how you cope. And I'm okay with that. 688 00:35:52,958 --> 00:35:57,461 But... I've been through "everything sucks." 689 00:35:57,529 --> 00:36:00,631 Illness and isolation. 690 00:36:00,666 --> 00:36:03,067 When I had cancer. When... When my parents split. 691 00:36:03,101 --> 00:36:04,902 I was so depressed that I could... 692 00:36:04,937 --> 00:36:07,405 I could barely get out of bed for the better part of a year. 693 00:36:07,439 --> 00:36:09,192 And I was 11. 694 00:36:10,642 --> 00:36:13,244 Then I met a kid at cancer camp. 695 00:36:13,312 --> 00:36:15,046 Morrow Willis. 696 00:36:15,080 --> 00:36:16,714 Kid was probably sicker than I was, 697 00:36:16,782 --> 00:36:19,116 but he didn't want to talk about treatments or symptoms. 698 00:36:19,151 --> 00:36:21,652 Just sports and "Mario Kart." 699 00:36:21,687 --> 00:36:25,957 So I said to myself, "What if I just focus on the good stuff?" 700 00:36:26,024 --> 00:36:27,458 And I tried it. 701 00:36:27,492 --> 00:36:31,662 And it turns out that's what works for me. 702 00:36:31,697 --> 00:36:33,564 That's what I need. 703 00:36:33,598 --> 00:36:35,399 And if you're okay with that, great, 704 00:36:35,434 --> 00:36:38,269 but if you need a partner in misery, I'm not your guy. 705 00:36:46,511 --> 00:36:48,481 Whatcha playing? 706 00:36:49,314 --> 00:36:50,948 Just a little something I made up. 707 00:36:50,983 --> 00:36:54,618 It's called, uh, "If the Virus Doesn't End Us, 708 00:36:54,653 --> 00:36:57,321 Then Climate Change Probably Will Blues." 709 00:37:09,835 --> 00:37:11,268 Hey. 710 00:37:11,336 --> 00:37:13,938 Hey. Wasn't sure you'd answer. 711 00:37:13,972 --> 00:37:16,440 Please. The woman who all but ghosted you for a month 712 00:37:16,475 --> 00:37:17,942 does not get to judge. 713 00:37:19,144 --> 00:37:21,979 It's just, uh... my dad. 714 00:37:22,014 --> 00:37:23,614 We don't have to talk about it 715 00:37:23,648 --> 00:37:26,650 if you're not ready to or if you don't want to. 716 00:37:26,685 --> 00:37:30,888 It makes me crazy because he... He seems like he's all charm, 717 00:37:30,922 --> 00:37:33,791 but he has got this temper that... 718 00:37:33,859 --> 00:37:38,129 Well, if you're serious about not talking about it right now, 719 00:37:38,163 --> 00:37:39,530 that can wait... 720 00:37:39,564 --> 00:37:42,333 because the things I want to do with you tonight... 721 00:37:42,401 --> 00:37:43,934 they can't. 722 00:37:43,969 --> 00:37:48,539 Oh, well, I'm going to need you to say more about that. 723 00:37:48,573 --> 00:37:50,074 Alright, alright. Hold on. Let me, uh... 724 00:37:50,108 --> 00:37:51,642 Let me try to share my screen. 725 00:37:51,676 --> 00:37:53,944 - Oh, my God. - What? 726 00:37:55,280 --> 00:37:56,914 Are we gonna watch porn? 727 00:37:56,948 --> 00:37:58,716 No. 728 00:37:58,784 --> 00:38:00,584 "Coming to America." 729 00:38:01,887 --> 00:38:03,154 Mm-hmm. 730 00:38:03,221 --> 00:38:06,891 Yes! Please! Ahh! 731 00:38:06,925 --> 00:38:08,592 Ugh! 732 00:38:08,627 --> 00:38:10,027 Okay. 733 00:38:12,531 --> 00:38:14,665 Hey, Tom?! 734 00:38:14,733 --> 00:38:16,867 Tom, it's me! 735 00:38:20,138 --> 00:38:23,374 I brought you soup and I know that you're home! 736 00:38:23,442 --> 00:38:27,078 It's that really excellent soup from that little Polish place. 737 00:38:30,649 --> 00:38:32,293 Tom... 738 00:38:32,918 --> 00:38:35,052 I know... I know that I am the last person 739 00:38:35,087 --> 00:38:36,320 that you want to see. 740 00:38:36,354 --> 00:38:37,955 I just... I don't know. 741 00:38:37,989 --> 00:38:39,924 I thought maybe we could talk through the door. 742 00:38:39,991 --> 00:38:44,862 I just feel like you need some semblance of human contact. 743 00:38:44,930 --> 00:38:48,933 I don't blame you for... for wanting to keep your distance, 744 00:38:48,967 --> 00:38:50,734 I mean, pandemic or not. 745 00:38:57,142 --> 00:38:59,944 I just want you to know that you're not alone. 746 00:39:12,023 --> 00:39:14,725 Experts say the more resilient we are, 747 00:39:14,759 --> 00:39:17,027 the better we can face life's challenges. 748 00:39:26,972 --> 00:39:29,106 I was so mad at you. 749 00:39:29,141 --> 00:39:31,060 What, for leaving you? 750 00:39:31,476 --> 00:39:34,178 For choosing someone over yourself. 751 00:39:34,212 --> 00:39:36,347 I didn't know I was gonna die. 752 00:39:37,000 --> 00:39:38,282 Do you regret it? 753 00:39:41,119 --> 00:39:43,521 Does that matter? 754 00:39:43,555 --> 00:39:46,157 You'd have done the same thing. Isn't that why you're here? 755 00:39:49,100 --> 00:39:51,095 Yeah. I guess. 756 00:39:51,163 --> 00:39:52,363 So it's your fault. 757 00:39:54,366 --> 00:39:56,200 How do you figure? 758 00:39:58,170 --> 00:40:00,006 Because you... 759 00:40:00,872 --> 00:40:03,707 went all-in for everybody. 760 00:40:03,742 --> 00:40:07,347 Your friends, your family, a woman at the bus stop. 761 00:40:07,913 --> 00:40:09,680 You think that didn't somehow affect me? 762 00:40:11,516 --> 00:40:13,937 You changed my life, George. 763 00:40:14,419 --> 00:40:16,854 I didn't say it then, but it's true. 764 00:40:16,888 --> 00:40:19,990 And the single biggest factor for cultivating resilience? 765 00:40:22,694 --> 00:40:25,062 Positive relationships. 766 00:40:36,508 --> 00:40:40,211 For what it's worth, I think you made the right call, 767 00:40:40,245 --> 00:40:42,048 putting her in the trial. 768 00:40:42,882 --> 00:40:45,760 I've known Meredith since she was a child. 769 00:40:47,219 --> 00:40:51,922 I watched her operate on her dolls in the OR gallery. 770 00:40:51,957 --> 00:40:56,527 I took her for milk and cookies in the cafeteria. 771 00:40:56,561 --> 00:40:59,597 I helped her get over her fear of the film review room 772 00:40:59,631 --> 00:41:02,266 because that's where she thought we kept the skeletons. 773 00:41:05,470 --> 00:41:10,034 And then I watched her become a surgeon, a wife... 774 00:41:10,942 --> 00:41:14,812 a mother, and a chief. 775 00:41:16,481 --> 00:41:21,285 You know, I knew COVID patients had to suffer in isolation. 776 00:41:21,319 --> 00:41:25,522 But I never gave any thought to how helpless 777 00:41:25,557 --> 00:41:28,125 and alone it feels 778 00:41:28,193 --> 00:41:30,527 for the people who care about them. 779 00:42:03,495 --> 00:42:05,729 So find your people... 780 00:42:07,032 --> 00:42:08,132 ...and keep them close. 781 00:42:12,504 --> 00:42:14,565 Because when you're at your lowest... 782 00:42:19,844 --> 00:42:21,475 ...those people get you through. 783 00:42:24,938 --> 00:42:30,030 *CREDITS*