1
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Previously on Young Sheldon...

2
00:00:01,782 --> 00:00:05,233
- So, he's really good to graduate?
- He sure is.

3
00:00:05,235 --> 00:00:07,068
Do you think I can make it from one end

4
00:00:07,070 --> 00:00:08,614
of the college campus to the other

5
00:00:08,616 --> 00:00:10,771
in under ten minutes,
including a bathroom break?

6
00:00:10,773 --> 00:00:12,594
How important is the bathroom break?

7
00:00:12,596 --> 00:00:14,596
Very. The class schedules are designed

8
00:00:14,598 --> 00:00:16,967
for fully grown bladders,
and mine is child-sized.

9
00:00:16,969 --> 00:00:18,454
One other bit of business.

10
00:00:18,456 --> 00:00:20,456
Since you're graduating
top of the class,

11
00:00:20,458 --> 00:00:22,325
that makes you our valedictorian.

12
00:00:22,327 --> 00:00:24,494
I'm so proud of you, baby.

13
00:00:24,496 --> 00:00:25,862
You seem surprised.

14
00:00:25,864 --> 00:00:28,030
Well, it's quite an accomplishment.

15
00:00:28,032 --> 00:00:29,900
In this school? I don't think so.

16
00:00:31,102 --> 00:00:32,803
We're really gonna miss you.

17
00:00:35,140 --> 00:00:38,207
I've always enjoyed math word problems.

18
00:00:38,209 --> 00:00:40,343
Try wrapping your noggin
around this one.

19
00:00:40,345 --> 00:00:42,678
A brilliant young boy named Sheldon

20
00:00:42,680 --> 00:00:44,066
is about to start college.

21
00:00:44,068 --> 00:00:46,316
He needs to get from
his linear algebra class

22
00:00:46,318 --> 00:00:49,418
to his physics class,
which is 822 meters away.

23
00:00:49,420 --> 00:00:52,406
If his stride is 23 inches long

24
00:00:52,408 --> 00:00:54,032
and he only has ten minutes,

25
00:00:54,034 --> 00:00:56,826
how many steps would he
have to take per minute

26
00:00:56,828 --> 00:00:59,428
to make it on time?
It's a doozy, isn't it?

27
00:00:59,430 --> 00:01:01,331
Don't worry.

28
00:01:01,333 --> 00:01:02,534
I'll show my work.

29
00:01:02,536 --> 00:01:06,168
First, we must determine the
maximum velocity achievable

30
00:01:06,170 --> 00:01:08,638
without breaking a sweat.

31
00:01:08,640 --> 00:01:09,974
Sweating is for jocks

32
00:01:09,976 --> 00:01:12,944
and those who are worried the jig is up.

33
00:01:20,151 --> 00:01:21,385
Hi, Sheldon.

34
00:01:21,387 --> 00:01:23,728
Not now, Billy. I'm in the
middle of a math problem.

35
00:01:23,730 --> 00:01:24,954
Okay.

36
00:01:28,293 --> 00:01:29,626
Darn it.

37
00:01:31,796 --> 00:01:33,329
What are you looking for?

38
00:01:33,331 --> 00:01:34,764
Chest hairs.

39
00:01:34,766 --> 00:01:36,465
Is there any chance I'll hit puberty

40
00:01:36,467 --> 00:01:37,533
in the next few weeks?

41
00:01:37,535 --> 00:01:39,970
Oh, God, I hope not. Why?

42
00:01:39,972 --> 00:01:41,018
The campus is so big,

43
00:01:41,020 --> 00:01:42,791
I'll never make it from
one class to another

44
00:01:42,793 --> 00:01:44,941
without a solid dose of testosterone.

45
00:01:44,943 --> 00:01:47,710
Maybe they'll let you leave
early so you'll have time.

46
00:01:47,712 --> 00:01:50,504
But the end of the class is when
I point out the teacher's mistakes.

47
00:01:50,506 --> 00:01:52,481
Everybody loves that.

48
00:01:52,483 --> 00:01:54,216
I'd say run across campus,

49
00:01:54,218 --> 00:01:55,885
but I know how you feel about sweating.

50
00:01:55,887 --> 00:01:58,221
It's the urine of the skin.

51
00:01:58,223 --> 00:01:59,923
Why not ride your bike?

52
00:01:59,925 --> 00:02:01,924
I considered that, but
I can't let my colleagues

53
00:02:01,926 --> 00:02:04,827
see me with training wheels.
They'll think I'm a child.

54
00:02:04,829 --> 00:02:06,596
- Can't have that.
- Mm-mm.

55
00:02:09,200 --> 00:02:10,800
See any fuzz growing?

56
00:02:10,802 --> 00:02:12,335
Let me look.

57
00:02:12,337 --> 00:02:13,736
Hey.

58
00:02:13,738 --> 00:02:15,606
No, Meemaw! Bad Meemaw.

59
00:02:16,427 --> 00:02:18,428
What do you want?

60
00:02:18,430 --> 00:02:20,584
I was hoping you could help
me build up my leg muscles

61
00:02:20,586 --> 00:02:21,946
to increase my speed.

62
00:02:21,948 --> 00:02:24,213
If you don't want people
chasing you, be less annoying.

63
00:02:24,215 --> 00:02:26,515
It's so I can get to my classes on time.

64
00:02:26,517 --> 00:02:29,385
Sheldon, you know you
ain't gonna work out.

65
00:02:29,387 --> 00:02:31,187
I will. This is important.

66
00:02:31,189 --> 00:02:33,055
Fine.

67
00:02:33,057 --> 00:02:34,498
Here. Hold these.

68
00:02:34,500 --> 00:02:36,467
Now, keep your back straight

69
00:02:36,469 --> 00:02:38,061
and bend your knees like this.

70
00:02:56,530 --> 00:02:58,298
Dad, you're a football coach.

71
00:02:58,300 --> 00:02:59,849
Do you use human growth hormone

72
00:02:59,851 --> 00:03:02,118
to enhance the performance
of your players?

73
00:03:02,120 --> 00:03:05,254
We lost our last game 63
to nine. What do you think?

74
00:03:05,256 --> 00:03:07,623
I think you should look
into human growth hormone.

75
00:03:07,625 --> 00:03:10,393
And if you do, send some this kid's way.

76
00:03:10,395 --> 00:03:13,051
With no access to controlled substances,

77
00:03:13,053 --> 00:03:14,797
I was left with only one option.

78
00:03:14,799 --> 00:03:17,266
Missy, will you teach me
to ride a bike tomorrow?

79
00:03:17,268 --> 00:03:19,035
- Why not Mom?
- Working.

80
00:03:19,037 --> 00:03:20,536
- Meemaw?
- Old.

81
00:03:20,538 --> 00:03:22,204
- Dad?
- Fat.

82
00:03:22,206 --> 00:03:23,273
Okay.

83
00:03:25,583 --> 00:03:28,218
I'm such a good person.

84
00:03:28,220 --> 00:03:29,854
All right. You're gonna pedal.

85
00:03:29,856 --> 00:03:31,447
I'm gonna run behind and hold you up.

86
00:03:31,449 --> 00:03:32,615
I'm nervous.

87
00:03:32,617 --> 00:03:34,283
Just pedal. You'll be fine.

88
00:03:34,285 --> 00:03:35,651
Ready?

89
00:03:35,653 --> 00:03:37,454
- Not really.
- Go.

90
00:03:38,623 --> 00:03:39,790
I'm doing it.

91
00:03:39,792 --> 00:03:41,390
- Okay, I'm gonna let go.
- Don't let go.

92
00:03:41,392 --> 00:03:42,698
- I'm letting go.
- Don't let go.

93
00:03:42,700 --> 00:03:44,393
- I already let go.
- You let go?

94
00:03:44,395 --> 00:03:45,661
I let go.

95
00:03:45,663 --> 00:03:46,874
I'm doing it.

96
00:03:46,876 --> 00:03:49,265
- You're doing it!
- I'm doing it!

97
00:04:09,984 --> 00:04:12,685
- Synced and corrected by Firefly -
- www.addic7ed.com -

98
00:04:12,687 --> 00:04:15,255
- Dad, Sheldon got hurt.
- How?

99
00:04:15,257 --> 00:04:17,091
A chicken chased him into a mailbox.

100
00:04:17,093 --> 00:04:18,293
Course it did.

101
00:04:21,253 --> 00:04:23,421
If I knew you could run, I
would've let you teach him.

102
00:04:23,423 --> 00:04:25,267
What happened?

103
00:04:25,269 --> 00:04:26,870
Belinda got off her leash.

104
00:04:26,872 --> 00:04:28,039
You okay?

105
00:04:28,041 --> 00:04:30,042
My arm really hurts. I want Mom.

106
00:04:30,044 --> 00:04:32,479
You got me. Now, let me take a look.

107
00:04:32,481 --> 00:04:34,543
- Don't touch it.
- I'm not gonna hurt you.

108
00:04:34,545 --> 00:04:36,679
I'm sorry, but you are
too big to be delicate.

109
00:04:36,681 --> 00:04:38,247
I'm delicate.

110
00:04:38,249 --> 00:04:39,782
Just want to see if you can bend it.

111
00:04:39,784 --> 00:04:41,751
I can't. It hurts too much.

112
00:04:41,753 --> 00:04:44,820
I'm gonna take him
to the emergency room.

113
00:04:44,822 --> 00:04:46,255
Come on.

114
00:04:46,257 --> 00:04:48,025
- You gonna be okay?
- Yeah.

115
00:04:49,627 --> 00:04:52,357
Have fun!

116
00:04:52,359 --> 00:04:53,760
_

117
00:04:53,762 --> 00:04:55,396
This is bad.

118
00:04:55,398 --> 00:04:56,565
You're gonna be just fine.

119
00:04:56,567 --> 00:04:58,467
This is the arm I write with.

120
00:04:58,469 --> 00:05:00,155
This is the arm I eat with.

121
00:05:00,157 --> 00:05:02,004
This is the arm I do
the Vulcan salute with.

122
00:05:02,006 --> 00:05:03,207
Ow.

123
00:05:03,209 --> 00:05:05,041
It's not too swollen.
That's a good sign.

124
00:05:05,043 --> 00:05:06,476
You're not a doctor.

125
00:05:06,478 --> 00:05:08,611
But I see this on the
football field all the time.

126
00:05:08,613 --> 00:05:10,579
Football players are meant to be hurt.

127
00:05:10,581 --> 00:05:12,081
I'm meant to be cherished.

128
00:05:12,083 --> 00:05:15,117
Okay. Looks like you
fractured your ulna.

129
00:05:15,119 --> 00:05:16,500
Oh, no.

130
00:05:16,502 --> 00:05:18,621
Two weeks in a cast,
you'll be good as new.

131
00:05:18,623 --> 00:05:20,689
- A cast? Don't those get sweaty?
- Mm-hmm.

132
00:05:20,691 --> 00:05:22,224
- They can.
- And itchy?

133
00:05:22,226 --> 00:05:23,526
- A little.
- Can it get wet?

134
00:05:23,528 --> 00:05:24,762
Not supposed to.

135
00:05:24,764 --> 00:05:26,265
Then how am I supposed to take a shower?

136
00:05:26,267 --> 00:05:28,030
Well, some people wrap
it in a garbage bag.

137
00:05:28,032 --> 00:05:29,865
That's where garbage goes.

138
00:05:29,867 --> 00:05:32,402
Did you get a discount doctor
because we're poor?

139
00:05:32,404 --> 00:05:34,229
Shelly, you okay?

140
00:05:34,231 --> 00:05:36,021
- I fractured my ulna.
- He's fine.

141
00:05:36,023 --> 00:05:37,657
I told you you didn't
need to come down here.

142
00:05:37,659 --> 00:05:40,076
My baby is in the emergency room.

143
00:05:40,078 --> 00:05:41,577
Yeah, with his father.

144
00:05:41,579 --> 00:05:42,878
Who let him get hurt.

145
00:05:42,880 --> 00:05:44,199
Me? I wasn't even there.

146
00:05:44,201 --> 00:05:45,548
If anything, it was Missy's fault.

147
00:05:45,550 --> 00:05:47,050
And Belinda Sparks.

148
00:05:47,052 --> 00:05:48,553
- Who?
- A chicken.

149
00:05:48,555 --> 00:05:50,519
What does a chicken
have to do with this?

150
00:05:50,521 --> 00:05:52,289
You know what, I'm gonna
let the nurse come in

151
00:05:52,291 --> 00:05:53,324
and put the cast on.

152
00:05:54,201 --> 00:05:57,055
Don't worry, baby.
You're gonna be just fine.

153
00:05:57,057 --> 00:05:59,591
- Thanks, Mom.
- That's what I been saying the whole time.

154
00:05:59,593 --> 00:06:01,761
But she cherishes me.

155
00:06:05,831 --> 00:06:07,230
That's so cool.

156
00:06:07,232 --> 00:06:08,432
Can I sign it?

157
00:06:08,434 --> 00:06:09,866
Why?

158
00:06:09,868 --> 00:06:11,568
'Cause that's what kids do.

159
00:06:11,570 --> 00:06:13,204
Why would I care what kids do?

160
00:06:13,206 --> 00:06:15,708
So when it's over, you can
have a cool reminder?

161
00:06:15,710 --> 00:06:18,105
I don't want a reminder.
This is traumatic.

162
00:06:18,107 --> 00:06:20,043
I might need counseling.

163
00:06:20,045 --> 00:06:22,145
Come on, don't be lame. Let me sign it.

164
00:06:22,147 --> 00:06:24,323
You're just gonna write something mean.

165
00:06:24,325 --> 00:06:26,526
You don't commit a crime
and sign your own name.

166
00:06:26,528 --> 00:06:27,751
Learned that one the hard way.

167
00:06:29,621 --> 00:06:31,555
Oh.

168
00:06:31,557 --> 00:06:32,590
Hey, Brenda.

169
00:06:32,592 --> 00:06:35,998
Hey. I just wanted to check in

170
00:06:36,000 --> 00:06:38,361
and see how Sheldon's doing.

171
00:06:38,363 --> 00:06:40,897
He'll be fine. It's
just a little fracture.

172
00:06:40,899 --> 00:06:42,966
Oh. Poor kid.

173
00:06:42,968 --> 00:06:46,738
Please know we feel terrible.

174
00:06:46,740 --> 00:06:48,541
Eh, accidents happen.

175
00:06:48,543 --> 00:06:50,707
Hey, speaking of accidents,

176
00:06:50,709 --> 00:06:53,510
which this clearly was,

177
00:06:53,512 --> 00:06:56,179
insurance covers everything, right?

178
00:06:56,181 --> 00:06:58,849
If you're worried about me
sending you a bill, don't be.

179
00:06:58,851 --> 00:07:00,218
Wasn't worried.

180
00:07:00,220 --> 00:07:03,150
I just wanted to bring you
some food as a peace offering

181
00:07:03,152 --> 00:07:05,756
and promise it will never happen again.

182
00:07:05,758 --> 00:07:07,891
Well, thanks.

183
00:07:07,893 --> 00:07:09,794
Ooh, fried chicken.

184
00:07:11,964 --> 00:07:14,298
Never again.

185
00:07:15,367 --> 00:07:17,734
"I hope your arm gets better soon.

186
00:07:17,736 --> 00:07:21,471
XO, Missy". See?

187
00:07:21,473 --> 00:07:23,690
- Nothing mean.
- Thank you.

188
00:07:23,692 --> 00:07:25,550
My sister could have a big heart.

189
00:07:25,552 --> 00:07:27,444
If only that were true of her brain.

190
00:07:27,446 --> 00:07:28,813
That's the wrong "your".

191
00:07:28,815 --> 00:07:29,949
What are you talking about?

192
00:07:29,951 --> 00:07:32,015
It's supposed to be Y-O-U-R.

193
00:07:32,017 --> 00:07:34,951
What you wrote means, "I
hope you are arm gets better".

194
00:07:34,953 --> 00:07:36,653
Oh.

195
00:07:36,655 --> 00:07:39,290
You defaced my body
with a grammatical error.

196
00:07:39,292 --> 00:07:42,027
I guess that's your problem. Y-O-U-R.

197
00:07:46,665 --> 00:07:49,966
Left-handed knocking. Wild.

198
00:07:49,968 --> 00:07:53,237
- Georgie?
- What?

199
00:07:53,239 --> 00:07:55,703
You're left-handed. Now
that I've joined your ranks,

200
00:07:55,705 --> 00:07:58,241
I was wondering if you
could tell me what to expect.

201
00:07:58,243 --> 00:08:00,677
I don't know. To me, it's just normal.

202
00:08:00,679 --> 00:08:02,946
But the vast majority of
people are right-handed.

203
00:08:02,948 --> 00:08:04,749
There must be some challenges.

204
00:08:05,916 --> 00:08:07,817
It's hard to cut stuff with scissors.

205
00:08:07,819 --> 00:08:09,686
Mom handles most of my cutting needs.

206
00:08:09,688 --> 00:08:12,622
Uh, when you shake hands,
it's the wrong hand.

207
00:08:12,624 --> 00:08:15,059
I don't shake hands. It's disgusting.

208
00:08:16,128 --> 00:08:17,861
Oh! When driving,

209
00:08:17,863 --> 00:08:19,329
the gear shifter's on the right side.

210
00:08:19,331 --> 00:08:21,431
And I'm not old enough to drive.

211
00:08:21,433 --> 00:08:22,997
Being a lefty doesn't seem so bad.

212
00:08:22,999 --> 00:08:25,100
I don't know why you complain so much.

213
00:08:29,007 --> 00:08:31,241
Don't worry, baby.

214
00:08:31,243 --> 00:08:33,877
I cut everything into
bite-size pieces for you.

215
00:08:33,879 --> 00:08:36,014
Maybe you could chew it up
and spit it in his mouth.

216
00:08:36,016 --> 00:08:38,384
- Please?
- Let's just say grace.

217
00:08:42,888 --> 00:08:44,855
Will you two help him with his mittens?

218
00:08:44,857 --> 00:08:46,256
Maybe he doesn't wear them.

219
00:08:46,258 --> 00:08:47,724
Then I'm not holding hands.

220
00:08:47,726 --> 00:08:49,527
We ain't got to hold hands? Sweet.

221
00:08:49,529 --> 00:08:52,094
- I like when we hold hands.
- We are holding hands.

222
00:08:52,096 --> 00:08:53,302
Let's go. Mittens.

223
00:08:53,304 --> 00:08:54,802
- Fine.
- Fine.

224
00:08:54,804 --> 00:08:56,805
Gently. Gently.

225
00:08:56,807 --> 00:08:57,934
I'm doing it gently.

226
00:08:57,936 --> 00:08:59,667
Well, your tone suggests otherwise.

227
00:08:59,669 --> 00:09:00,902
Just give me your hand.

228
00:09:02,600 --> 00:09:03,834
Gently.

229
00:09:05,510 --> 00:09:07,478
There.

230
00:09:09,775 --> 00:09:12,382
Bless us, Lord, for the food
we are about to receive,

231
00:09:12,384 --> 00:09:13,867
and bless the hands that prepared it.

232
00:09:13,869 --> 00:09:17,053
And bless Sheldon's arm
to heal strong and quick.

233
00:09:17,055 --> 00:09:18,221
Strongly and quickly.

234
00:09:18,223 --> 00:09:19,524
Amen.

235
00:09:19,526 --> 00:09:21,426
Amen.

236
00:09:21,428 --> 00:09:23,927
I've never operated a fork
with my left hand before.

237
00:09:23,929 --> 00:09:25,087
I hope this goes well.

238
00:09:25,089 --> 00:09:27,415
When my buddy Mikey got
the cast off his leg,

239
00:09:27,417 --> 00:09:30,252
you would not believe how
skinny and smelly it was.

240
00:09:30,254 --> 00:09:32,489
Like beef jerky with toes.

241
00:09:32,491 --> 00:09:33,857
Can we please just eat?

242
00:09:36,788 --> 00:09:37,822
Chicken's good.

243
00:09:37,824 --> 00:09:39,442
Mrs. Sparks made it.

244
00:09:39,444 --> 00:09:40,544
Huh?

245
00:09:44,316 --> 00:09:45,982
My first bathroom attempt.

246
00:09:45,984 --> 00:09:47,884
Let's hope this goes well.

247
00:09:47,886 --> 00:09:50,403
Let me know if you need help.

248
00:09:50,405 --> 00:09:51,639
I think I'll be okay.

249
00:09:51,641 --> 00:09:53,509
It's just number one.

250
00:09:53,511 --> 00:09:55,152
I'm here if you need me.

251
00:09:57,885 --> 00:10:00,486
Mom, I can't get my zipper down!

252
00:10:00,488 --> 00:10:03,390
I'm coming.

253
00:10:03,392 --> 00:10:04,960
I am not saying

254
00:10:04,962 --> 00:10:07,963
my mother and I had a
codependent relationship.

255
00:10:07,965 --> 00:10:10,867
Mom, I can't get my zipper up!

256
00:10:10,869 --> 00:10:12,551
I'm on my way!

257
00:10:12,553 --> 00:10:14,880
But she did have a tendency to baby me,

258
00:10:14,882 --> 00:10:17,305
and boy howdy, was I okay with that.

259
00:10:19,551 --> 00:10:22,477
- How's this?
- It's like I'm doing it myself.

260
00:10:24,122 --> 00:10:26,122
Mm.

261
00:10:27,127 --> 00:10:29,261
Mm-mm.

262
00:10:29,263 --> 00:10:31,661
Ooh, you got it.

263
00:10:31,663 --> 00:10:33,396
Yup, chicken.

264
00:10:33,398 --> 00:10:36,200
I don't have to tell you to be gentle.

265
00:10:36,202 --> 00:10:38,203
No, you don't.

266
00:10:40,642 --> 00:10:43,210
- Washcloth?
- Washcloth.

267
00:10:43,212 --> 00:10:44,413
Soap?

268
00:10:44,415 --> 00:10:46,382
Soap.

269
00:10:46,384 --> 00:10:47,584
Shampoo?

270
00:10:47,586 --> 00:10:49,421
Shampoo.

271
00:10:49,423 --> 00:10:50,714
Baby shampoo?

272
00:10:50,716 --> 00:10:52,577
Does E equal MC squared?

273
00:10:52,579 --> 00:10:53,680
Love you.

274
00:10:55,304 --> 00:10:58,086
"The quantum properties of
matter are to be associated

275
00:10:58,088 --> 00:11:02,091
with incompletely
defined potentialities,

276
00:11:02,093 --> 00:11:05,541
which can be more
definitely realized..."

277
00:11:10,135 --> 00:11:12,149
All right, you're gonna pedal.

278
00:11:12,151 --> 00:11:13,804
I'm gonna run behind and hold you up.

279
00:11:13,806 --> 00:11:14,840
I'm nervous.

280
00:11:14,842 --> 00:11:16,376
Just pedal. You'll be fine.

281
00:11:16,378 --> 00:11:17,945
You're gonna get hurt!

282
00:11:17,947 --> 00:11:19,381
What?

283
00:11:19,383 --> 00:11:21,050
Put us back on!

284
00:11:21,052 --> 00:11:22,252
Mom?

285
00:11:22,254 --> 00:11:24,681
You need us. We'll keep you safe!

286
00:11:24,683 --> 00:11:26,850
This is weird.

287
00:11:26,852 --> 00:11:28,218
We're a team.

288
00:11:28,220 --> 00:11:30,914
You and I belong together.

289
00:11:30,916 --> 00:11:33,256
No. I have to grow up and go to college.

290
00:11:33,258 --> 00:11:34,828
Forever!

291
00:11:34,830 --> 00:11:36,192
Getting weirder.

292
00:11:36,194 --> 00:11:37,827
Forever...

293
00:11:37,829 --> 00:11:39,864
and ever!

294
00:11:41,952 --> 00:11:43,752
Forever and ever and ever.

295
00:11:43,754 --> 00:11:47,568
- "That is, if we try to picture the position..."
- No.

296
00:11:47,570 --> 00:11:49,686
Mom's my training wheels.

297
00:11:49,688 --> 00:11:52,756
I can't have training wheels.

298
00:11:52,758 --> 00:11:56,527
- Mom's my training wheels.
- Lot of noise over there.

299
00:11:58,564 --> 00:12:00,097
Everything okay?

300
00:12:00,099 --> 00:12:01,323
I'm not sure.

301
00:12:01,325 --> 00:12:02,699
What's going on?

302
00:12:02,701 --> 00:12:05,994
Ugh. He was muttering in his sleep that

303
00:12:05,996 --> 00:12:07,663
I am his training wheels.

304
00:12:07,665 --> 00:12:09,773
What on earth does that mean?

305
00:12:09,775 --> 00:12:11,790
Well, let's think about it.

306
00:12:11,792 --> 00:12:13,460
Training wheels are for little kids.

307
00:12:13,462 --> 00:12:16,213
Maybe he doesn't want
to be a little kid anymore.

308
00:12:16,215 --> 00:12:18,282
What does that have to do with me?

309
00:12:19,985 --> 00:12:22,953
You have made it your life's
mission to hold him up.

310
00:12:22,955 --> 00:12:24,856
What are you saying here?

311
00:12:24,858 --> 00:12:27,724
That I am wrong to love
and protect my son?

312
00:12:27,726 --> 00:12:30,394
That he doesn't need his mother
to keep an eye on him?

313
00:12:30,396 --> 00:12:31,762
I'm not saying that. I...

314
00:12:31,764 --> 00:12:33,430
I would never say that.

315
00:12:33,432 --> 00:12:35,700
All right then.

316
00:12:37,736 --> 00:12:39,771
I'm not an idiot.

317
00:12:42,215 --> 00:12:43,282
Did you have

318
00:12:43,284 --> 00:12:45,776
a tough time when your kids
started being independent?

319
00:12:45,778 --> 00:12:46,843
I'll let you know.

320
00:12:46,845 --> 00:12:48,645
What does that mean?

321
00:12:48,647 --> 00:12:50,956
Means one of 'em is still
sitting in my kitchen

322
00:12:50,958 --> 00:12:52,613
whining about something.

323
00:12:52,615 --> 00:12:56,017
Could you be supportive for once?

324
00:12:57,222 --> 00:13:00,490
Yes, watching your kids grow up is hard.

325
00:13:00,492 --> 00:13:02,326
So how do you handle it?

326
00:13:02,328 --> 00:13:05,095
I find a little bourbon in
my coffee does the trick.

327
00:13:05,097 --> 00:13:07,065
And we're back to being not helpful.

328
00:13:08,767 --> 00:13:11,393
Look, you haven't even gotten
to the worst part of it yet.

329
00:13:11,395 --> 00:13:12,504
They're gonna leave home.

330
00:13:12,506 --> 00:13:15,074
- They're gonna move to another city.
- Oh, Lord.

331
00:13:15,076 --> 00:13:16,176
They're gonna tell you

332
00:13:16,178 --> 00:13:19,309
their loser boyfriend
has knocked them up.

333
00:13:19,311 --> 00:13:22,613
- Just to be clear, that would be you.
- Sorry.

334
00:13:22,615 --> 00:13:25,649
- Turned my hair gray overnight.
- I said sorry.

335
00:13:25,651 --> 00:13:28,301
Clearly, you're not in the mood to help.

336
00:13:28,303 --> 00:13:31,872
Listen, it's hard being a parent,

337
00:13:31,874 --> 00:13:35,993
but if you do it right, they
don't need you anymore.

338
00:13:35,995 --> 00:13:38,028
Well, I don't like that.

339
00:13:38,030 --> 00:13:41,565
I get it, but I just don't like it.

340
00:13:41,567 --> 00:13:45,699
Well, I'd point out, you'll
always have your husband,

341
00:13:45,701 --> 00:13:48,737
but you want me to be "helpful".

342
00:13:51,043 --> 00:13:54,711
Johannes Diderik van der Waals.

343
00:13:54,713 --> 00:13:57,919
Nils Gustaf Dalén.

344
00:13:57,921 --> 00:13:59,954
Heike Kamerlingh Onnes.

345
00:13:59,956 --> 00:14:01,418
What are you going?

346
00:14:01,420 --> 00:14:04,021
Listing Nobel Prize winners in physics.

347
00:14:04,023 --> 00:14:05,456
Why?

348
00:14:05,458 --> 00:14:07,692
To keep me from cracking
this cast like a coconut

349
00:14:07,694 --> 00:14:09,693
and scratching my skin off.

350
00:14:09,695 --> 00:14:11,495
I need Mom to sing "Soft Kitty".

351
00:14:11,497 --> 00:14:13,063
Don't do it.

352
00:14:13,065 --> 00:14:14,398
Why?

353
00:14:14,400 --> 00:14:15,899
You're being a baby again.

354
00:14:15,901 --> 00:14:17,100
But I'm injured.

355
00:14:17,102 --> 00:14:19,503
Big deal. You broke your arm.

356
00:14:19,505 --> 00:14:21,672
Look at Stephen Hawking over there.

357
00:14:21,674 --> 00:14:23,641
He's in a wheelchair.

358
00:14:23,643 --> 00:14:26,278
You don't hear him whining
about it with his robot voice.

359
00:14:28,814 --> 00:14:31,598
So you're saying he and
I are brilliant minds

360
00:14:31,600 --> 00:14:34,652
who have both suffered
great physical adversity.

361
00:14:34,654 --> 00:14:36,753
That's not even close
to what I'm saying.

362
00:14:36,755 --> 00:14:38,121
Well, that's what I heard.

363
00:14:38,123 --> 00:14:41,258
And if Hawking doesn't let it stop him,

364
00:14:41,260 --> 00:14:43,427
then I can't let this cast stop me.

365
00:14:43,429 --> 00:14:44,961
Great. Go back to sleep.

366
00:14:44,963 --> 00:14:47,965
I will, and I'll do it all by myself.

367
00:14:54,573 --> 00:14:58,166
- ? Soft kitty, warm kitty ?
- Oh, my God.

368
00:14:58,168 --> 00:15:00,655
? Little ball of fur ?

369
00:15:00,657 --> 00:15:04,256
? Happy kitty, sleepy kitty, purr ?

370
00:15:04,258 --> 00:15:06,484
? Purr, purr. ?

371
00:15:14,560 --> 00:15:16,526
I did it.

372
00:15:16,528 --> 00:15:18,437
Missy, I did it!

373
00:15:18,439 --> 00:15:20,497
What?

374
00:15:20,499 --> 00:15:22,466
I slept through the night.

375
00:15:22,468 --> 00:15:23,767
What time is it?

376
00:15:23,769 --> 00:15:25,669
6:14.

377
00:15:25,671 --> 00:15:28,672
This is why people hate you.

378
00:15:28,674 --> 00:15:31,975
My sister's crankiness
did not dampen my enthusiasm.

379
00:15:31,977 --> 00:15:34,390
A chicken may have fractured my arm,

380
00:15:34,392 --> 00:15:36,826
but nothing could
break my can-do spirit.

381
00:15:38,337 --> 00:15:40,208
All in the bowl, none on me.

382
00:15:40,210 --> 00:15:41,952
I call that a successful urination.

383
00:15:41,954 --> 00:15:43,954
Great. Go teach your brother.

384
00:15:46,191 --> 00:15:50,293
I will not be denied my jelly.

385
00:15:50,295 --> 00:15:51,695
Yes!

386
00:15:51,697 --> 00:15:54,765
Watch out, peanut butter. You're next.

387
00:15:54,767 --> 00:15:56,234
Who would like to tell us

388
00:15:56,236 --> 00:15:58,235
how God touched their lives this week?

389
00:15:58,237 --> 00:15:59,870
Sheldon.

390
00:15:59,872 --> 00:16:01,938
He didn't, because He doesn't exist.

391
00:16:01,940 --> 00:16:03,573
Then why raise your hand?

392
00:16:03,575 --> 00:16:05,484
Not just any hand. My left hand.

393
00:16:05,486 --> 00:16:07,844
Because I'm able to
overcome any obstacle.

394
00:16:07,846 --> 00:16:09,579
And maybe God helped you do that.

395
00:16:09,581 --> 00:16:11,117
Actually, it was Stephen Hawking,

396
00:16:11,119 --> 00:16:13,016
and he's better because he exists.

397
00:16:13,018 --> 00:16:15,652
Yes, 'cause God made him. Anybody else?

398
00:16:15,654 --> 00:16:18,088
- Billy.
- Is this gonna be on the test?

399
00:16:18,090 --> 00:16:19,556
Oh, boy.

400
00:16:19,558 --> 00:16:20,792
I took a moment

401
00:16:20,794 --> 00:16:23,760
to reflect on my journey
of the last two weeks.

402
00:16:23,762 --> 00:16:29,199
Such emotional growth was worthy
of a majestic bubble beard.

403
00:16:31,605 --> 00:16:34,437
Perhaps my sister was right.

404
00:16:34,439 --> 00:16:37,741
This was a time I'd want to remember.

405
00:16:37,743 --> 00:16:39,876
Dad, will you sign my cast?

406
00:16:39,878 --> 00:16:41,846
Sure.

407
00:16:45,150 --> 00:16:48,385
And if you have any grammar
questions, please ask first.

408
00:16:52,958 --> 00:16:55,960
"Have a great summer. Georgie".

409
00:16:57,111 --> 00:16:59,079
Normally I'd write,
"Have a bitchin' summer",

410
00:16:59,081 --> 00:17:00,529
but I figured you wouldn't like that.

411
00:17:00,531 --> 00:17:01,798
I wouldn't.

412
00:17:01,800 --> 00:17:03,433
My meemaw wrote...

413
00:17:03,435 --> 00:17:05,468
"To my brave Moon Pie.

414
00:17:05,470 --> 00:17:09,573
You handled this like a true Texan".

415
00:17:10,935 --> 00:17:12,386
My mom wrote...

416
00:17:12,388 --> 00:17:15,345
"Shelly, you'll always be my baby,

417
00:17:15,347 --> 00:17:19,082
but I'm so proud of the
young man you've become.

418
00:17:19,084 --> 00:17:20,985
Love, Mom".

419
00:17:22,487 --> 00:17:24,120
And Billy wrote...

420
00:17:24,122 --> 00:17:25,423
"Billy".

421
00:17:29,614 --> 00:17:31,903
The next day, I got my cast off.

422
00:17:31,905 --> 00:17:34,996
In a world where I valued symmetry,

423
00:17:34,998 --> 00:17:36,309
I was relieved to see

424
00:17:36,311 --> 00:17:39,578
that both my arms were
as pale and skinny as ever.

425
00:17:39,580 --> 00:17:43,748
But this Texan had unfinished
business to tend to.

426
00:17:43,750 --> 00:17:45,149
Want me to get you started?

427
00:17:45,151 --> 00:17:47,386
No, I can do it.

428
00:17:51,725 --> 00:17:53,958
And I did do it.

429
00:17:53,960 --> 00:17:57,495
I rode my bike without
training wheels like an adult.

430
00:17:57,497 --> 00:17:58,898
It would take more than a chicken

431
00:17:58,900 --> 00:18:01,382
or the threat of a
fractured bone to scare me.

432
00:18:01,384 --> 00:18:04,019
It would take a brown
beast named Scraps.

433
00:18:04,021 --> 00:18:06,388
Aah!

434
00:18:06,390 --> 00:18:08,313
Mommy?!

435
00:18:08,315 --> 00:18:10,798
I rode my bike 11 miles that day.

436
00:18:10,800 --> 00:18:12,533
Mommy!

437
00:18:12,535 --> 00:18:16,535
- Synced and corrected by Firefly -
- www.addic7ed.com -

