1
00:00:01,335 --> 00:00:03,802
Hey, what do you say we both
jump in and not look back?

2
00:00:03,804 --> 00:00:05,937
Debby, I have a cat at home.

3
00:00:05,962 --> 00:00:07,218
Fair enough.

4
00:00:09,076 --> 00:00:10,375
You know, before I let you go,

5
00:00:10,377 --> 00:00:12,010
I wouldn't feel right
if I didn't mention

6
00:00:12,012 --> 00:00:15,751
our expanded security extended
warranty one more time.

7
00:00:15,863 --> 00:00:17,696
You know what? Let's do it.

8
00:00:17,721 --> 00:00:20,088
Great! I'll update the
agreement and email you.

9
00:00:20,153 --> 00:00:23,955
Hey, Debby, have you seen
that 2020 blue Scimitar...

10
00:00:23,957 --> 00:00:25,487
I'm with a customer.

11
00:00:25,959 --> 00:00:28,237
Why don't you check the lot, Vicky?

12
00:00:29,530 --> 00:00:31,863
Good... yeah... good... thank you. Okay.

13
00:00:31,865 --> 00:00:34,253
I mean, if she doesn't know
where it is, why would I?

14
00:00:34,620 --> 00:00:36,286
You're gonna love that Sun Gem,

15
00:00:36,311 --> 00:00:38,565
and I hope you enjoyed
your experience with me.

16
00:00:38,590 --> 00:00:41,925
Would you say it was a
five out of five stars?

17
00:00:42,176 --> 00:00:44,509
Um, yeah. Yes.

18
00:00:44,511 --> 00:00:46,878
Great! I'd consider
anything less a failure,

19
00:00:46,880 --> 00:00:48,439
and so would Jupiter.

20
00:00:48,686 --> 00:00:51,821
You might be contacted to
participate in a survey.

21
00:00:52,019 --> 00:00:54,230
It'd mean the world to me if
you gave me five out of five.

22
00:00:54,417 --> 00:00:56,117
Great. Well, thanks for the help.

23
00:00:56,142 --> 00:00:57,527
You bet.

24
00:00:58,729 --> 00:01:01,035
Don't forget, five out of five.

25
00:01:01,267 --> 00:01:02,339
Got it.

26
00:01:02,495 --> 00:01:03,449
Good.

27
00:01:08,569 --> 00:01:09,968
- Hello?
- Hi, Jacob.

28
00:01:09,970 --> 00:01:12,337
Congratulations on your
new Jupiter Sun Gem.

29
00:01:12,339 --> 00:01:14,840
We'd love you to take a brief
survey about your experience...

30
00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:21,913
Sorry. Forgot to give this to you.

31
00:01:21,915 --> 00:01:23,882
It's a paper copy of the survey

32
00:01:23,884 --> 00:01:25,515
in case you're an
old-fashioned kind of guy.

33
00:01:25,540 --> 00:01:28,460
Yes. Thank you, Debby. Bye.

34
00:01:32,670 --> 00:01:34,359
Five out of five!

35
00:01:37,865 --> 00:01:38,997
Five out of five.

36
00:01:51,440 --> 00:01:57,299
- Synced and corrected by Firefly -
- www.addic7ed.com -

37
00:01:58,118 --> 00:02:00,252
Can you believe it's
only been six months

38
00:02:00,254 --> 00:02:01,887
since your last performance review?

39
00:02:01,889 --> 00:02:03,521
Wow. Where to begin?

40
00:02:03,523 --> 00:02:05,223
I guess, let's start at the top.

41
00:02:05,225 --> 00:02:06,958
Your hair is disgusting.
Everybody can tell

42
00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:08,460
you're using shampoo-conditioner combo.

43
00:02:08,462 --> 00:02:09,928
Moving down the skull,
you're starting to get

44
00:02:09,930 --> 00:02:11,463
bags under your eyes like Jake,

45
00:02:11,465 --> 00:02:13,198
and it's making harder
to tell you apart.

46
00:02:13,200 --> 00:02:15,567
On a positive note, you are not a fraud,

47
00:02:15,569 --> 00:02:17,636
but that's only because
you failed to fool anyone

48
00:02:17,638 --> 00:02:19,410
into thinking you are
remotely competent.

49
00:02:19,878 --> 00:02:21,239
On a negative note,

50
00:02:21,241 --> 00:02:22,774
- you're an absolute fool.
- _

51
00:02:22,776 --> 00:02:24,776
And you're checking
your phone in the middle

52
00:02:24,778 --> 00:02:26,344
of a performance review.

53
00:02:26,346 --> 00:02:28,647
Your knees are knobby as all hell,

54
00:02:28,649 --> 00:02:30,849
just two big, horrifying knobs.

55
00:02:30,851 --> 00:02:33,451
I'd turn them, but I'm afraid
what lurks behind those doors.

56
00:02:33,453 --> 00:02:34,920
I'll skip your splinty shins for now,

57
00:02:34,922 --> 00:02:36,488
but we both know your toes are weird,

58
00:02:36,490 --> 00:02:37,789
and last but not least,

59
00:02:37,791 --> 00:02:39,991
we know from our screen
monitoring program

60
00:02:39,993 --> 00:02:42,227
you've been watching movies at work.

61
00:02:42,229 --> 00:02:44,615
And you have terrible taste.

62
00:02:44,640 --> 00:02:47,775
In summation, your job
is hanging by a thread,

63
00:02:47,800 --> 00:02:50,147
and you're living in a scissors factory.

64
00:02:51,233 --> 00:02:54,539
Well, John, some of those adjectives

65
00:02:54,541 --> 00:02:57,318
- will haunt me for the rest of my life.
- Right.

66
00:02:57,320 --> 00:02:59,947
You clearly put a lot
of thought into that, so...

67
00:03:01,281 --> 00:03:02,423
good job.

68
00:03:05,252 --> 00:03:10,155
Sorry, you're telling
me that I did a good job

69
00:03:10,157 --> 00:03:12,090
on your performance review?

70
00:03:14,828 --> 00:03:16,194
Yeah?

71
00:03:17,831 --> 00:03:18,796
Great.

72
00:03:19,867 --> 00:03:21,022
Thank you, Matt.

73
00:03:21,401 --> 00:03:23,077
I did do a good job.

74
00:03:24,420 --> 00:03:27,064
And hey, all that stuff about
your job hanging by a thread,

75
00:03:27,089 --> 00:03:29,174
you know I'm just trying
to motivate you, right?

76
00:03:29,176 --> 00:03:31,076
I mean, if the lion tamer
doesn't crack the whip,

77
00:03:31,078 --> 00:03:33,177
the lions start thinking
he doesn't have a whip.

78
00:03:33,202 --> 00:03:34,933
You catch my drift? I
don't know if you've ever

79
00:03:34,958 --> 00:03:36,548
seen lions turn on their master,

80
00:03:36,550 --> 00:03:39,618
but there's a reason that I
stopped watching lion videos.

81
00:03:39,620 --> 00:03:42,372
That's a really effective analogy, John.

82
00:03:42,525 --> 00:03:43,771
Good job.

83
00:03:44,240 --> 00:03:45,070
Great.

84
00:03:45,526 --> 00:03:47,192
"Hi, Jacob, it's been three days

85
00:03:47,194 --> 00:03:48,660
since you purchased your Sun Gem,

86
00:03:48,662 --> 00:03:51,027
and Jupiter hasn't received
your survey results yet.

87
00:03:51,052 --> 00:03:52,731
As you know, anything less than a five

88
00:03:52,733 --> 00:03:53,800
is seen as failure".

89
00:03:53,802 --> 00:03:54,901
Why don't you just fill out the survey?

90
00:03:54,903 --> 00:03:55,936
It'll take ten seconds.

91
00:03:55,938 --> 00:03:57,239
Every day, there's some new bullshit

92
00:03:57,241 --> 00:03:59,738
for me to rate and review.
It's driving me insane.

93
00:03:59,740 --> 00:04:02,240
I feel guilty if I don't give
everyone positive feedback.

94
00:04:02,242 --> 00:04:04,075
I give all my Lyft drivers five stars,

95
00:04:04,077 --> 00:04:05,110
even the racist ones.

96
00:04:05,112 --> 00:04:06,878
Knock, knock. Hey, Matt,

97
00:04:06,880 --> 00:04:09,648
I remember that you've got a
sharp eye for graphic design,

98
00:04:09,650 --> 00:04:13,251
so I was wondering what
you think of the font

99
00:04:13,253 --> 00:04:16,385
on the heading here. Let's
get you down here, buddy.

100
00:04:18,799 --> 00:04:20,058
Um, looks fine.

101
00:04:21,295 --> 00:04:23,409
Just fine? Or...

102
00:04:24,901 --> 00:04:26,973
Um, I mean, it looks great.

103
00:04:27,707 --> 00:04:28,739
Good job, John.

104
00:04:29,494 --> 00:04:30,337
Great.

105
00:04:32,020 --> 00:04:34,105
Oh. Having trouble deciding
what you're gonna watch?

106
00:04:34,107 --> 00:04:36,107
- No, I wasn't...
- Easy answer.

107
00:04:36,109 --> 00:04:38,176
The doc about those Thai boys

108
00:04:38,178 --> 00:04:39,945
who got stuck in that evil cave.

109
00:04:39,947 --> 00:04:41,351
I rated it a must-see.

110
00:04:41,715 --> 00:04:43,828
You do remember the Thai
boys, don't you, Matt?

111
00:04:44,117 --> 00:04:46,184
Oh, dear Christ, you haven't
forgotten the Thai boys?

112
00:04:46,186 --> 00:04:49,120
Oh, no, yeah, I remember
reading about those guys.

113
00:04:49,784 --> 00:04:51,122
Um, I just don't have
a cable login, so...

114
00:04:51,124 --> 00:04:52,257
Well, no one does, Matt.

115
00:04:52,259 --> 00:04:54,559
Well, except my wife's grandfather.

116
00:04:54,561 --> 00:04:57,462
He died, but his cable
subscription lives on.

117
00:04:57,464 --> 00:04:59,875
Nice little windfall
for the wife and me.

118
00:05:00,008 --> 00:05:02,042
I'll give you the password.
Go ahead, write this down.

119
00:05:02,367 --> 00:05:03,898
Jake, earmuffs.

120
00:05:07,140 --> 00:05:08,707
The password is "JakeEarmuffs".

121
00:05:08,709 --> 00:05:09,707
- Oh.
- Yeah.

122
00:05:10,577 --> 00:05:12,996
Jake, what are you
doing with your hands?

123
00:05:13,217 --> 00:05:14,418
It's not winter.

124
00:05:14,915 --> 00:05:17,918
They told me I was shy
in my performance review.

125
00:05:18,318 --> 00:05:21,319
You know the synonyms
for shy? I looked them up.

126
00:05:21,321 --> 00:05:24,654
Meek, reticent, sheepish, mousy.

127
00:05:25,068 --> 00:05:26,591
How can I be a sheep and a mouse?

128
00:05:26,810 --> 00:05:28,760
You aren't shy. Someone calls you shy,

129
00:05:28,762 --> 00:05:30,595
it just means they don't
know anything about you.

130
00:05:30,597 --> 00:05:32,397
It's like when someone
gives you a candle as a gift.

131
00:05:32,399 --> 00:05:33,345
Yeah.

132
00:05:33,370 --> 00:05:35,537
Didn't you get me a
candle for my birthday?

133
00:05:35,669 --> 00:05:37,936
Yeah, but that's because
you're a sheepish candle mouse.

134
00:05:38,140 --> 00:05:39,071
_

135
00:05:39,095 --> 00:05:40,273
_

136
00:05:40,274 --> 00:05:43,045
No. You don't get to know
how I feel about you.

137
00:05:43,844 --> 00:05:44,910
Sorry about him.

138
00:05:44,912 --> 00:05:46,444
I think you're doing a good job.

139
00:05:46,446 --> 00:05:49,114
Whoa, no, you don't. This is on me.

140
00:05:49,116 --> 00:05:50,182
Oh, thanks, John.

141
00:05:50,184 --> 00:05:51,728
Let's do a working lunch.

142
00:05:51,897 --> 00:05:52,964
Okay.

143
00:05:53,154 --> 00:05:54,564
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised

144
00:05:54,566 --> 00:05:56,354
if Debby showed up at
my house with a gun.

145
00:05:56,356 --> 00:05:58,290
That's why I use a fake address

146
00:05:58,292 --> 00:06:00,525
when I buy literally everything.

147
00:06:00,527 --> 00:06:02,160
Doesn't that make it
hard to get deliveries?

148
00:06:02,162 --> 00:06:03,186
Yeah.

149
00:06:03,211 --> 00:06:04,610
It's ruining my life.

150
00:06:06,929 --> 00:06:08,960
Uh-oh. I haven't said
a word in ten minutes.

151
00:06:09,203 --> 00:06:12,037
No one seems to have noticed.
Of course, they haven't.

152
00:06:12,039 --> 00:06:13,939
They think I'm shy, and I'm sitting here

153
00:06:13,941 --> 00:06:15,684
giving them mountains of evidence.

154
00:06:15,709 --> 00:06:17,843
If only I could find an in.

155
00:06:17,845 --> 00:06:19,197
What about you, Grace?

156
00:06:23,684 --> 00:06:24,916
Um... I...

157
00:06:24,918 --> 00:06:26,718
Oh, did I tell you guys about the survey

158
00:06:26,720 --> 00:06:27,919
I had to do about a survey?

159
00:06:27,921 --> 00:06:28,981
No.

160
00:06:29,723 --> 00:06:32,536
Here likes Grace, who was shy.

161
00:06:32,711 --> 00:06:35,244
No, no, that's too much for me.

162
00:06:35,269 --> 00:06:37,914
Mine will be an unmarked grave.

163
00:06:38,065 --> 00:06:40,195
All right, one more.

164
00:06:40,343 --> 00:06:42,667
Go ahead and give me your worst.

165
00:06:42,669 --> 00:06:44,519
I really shit the bed on this.

166
00:06:45,284 --> 00:06:47,284
No, John, I think you did a good job.

167
00:06:49,210 --> 00:06:51,034
I didn't shit the bed.

168
00:06:54,287 --> 00:06:55,488
Good job, John.

169
00:06:55,816 --> 00:06:56,832
Great.

170
00:06:57,451 --> 00:06:59,348
Okay, three-pointer.

171
00:07:03,567 --> 00:07:04,370
Damn it.

172
00:07:04,769 --> 00:07:06,346
Okay, recalibrate.

173
00:07:07,761 --> 00:07:08,762
Open wider.

174
00:07:08,764 --> 00:07:09,635
Ah!

175
00:07:09,767 --> 00:07:11,846
Let me get pitcher's stance on this.

176
00:07:13,066 --> 00:07:14,587
You gotta call the pitch, Matt.

177
00:07:16,361 --> 00:07:17,876
Uh-uh. I want to toss something funky.

178
00:07:18,086 --> 00:07:20,861
I'm Randy Johnson, and
you're that poor bird.

179
00:07:35,455 --> 00:07:37,122
- Hello?
- Hello, Jacob,

180
00:07:37,124 --> 00:07:39,658
and congratulations on
your new Jupiter Sun Gem.

181
00:07:39,660 --> 00:07:42,060
We'd love to get your
feedback on your experience.

182
00:07:42,062 --> 00:07:43,428
Hi, Jacob.

183
00:07:43,430 --> 00:07:44,763
It's your pal Debby Deberson,

184
00:07:44,765 --> 00:07:46,231
just checking in about that survey.

185
00:07:46,233 --> 00:07:47,465
Hello, Jacob,

186
00:07:47,467 --> 00:07:49,534
and congratulations on
your new Jupiter Sun Gem.

187
00:07:49,536 --> 00:07:50,802
Hi, Jacob.

188
00:07:54,107 --> 00:07:55,473
Guess who? It's Debby.

189
00:07:55,475 --> 00:07:57,683
Don't make me beg for
a five out of five.

190
00:08:12,196 --> 00:08:13,592
Hi, Jacob.

191
00:08:14,502 --> 00:08:16,268
What are you doing at my house?

192
00:08:16,270 --> 00:08:18,523
It's been a week. You still
haven't filled out that survey.

193
00:08:18,525 --> 00:08:20,092
I was worried something happened to you.

194
00:08:20,094 --> 00:08:22,549
But, you know, luckily I had
your address in the paperwork.

195
00:08:22,574 --> 00:08:24,674
You know, I really need
that five out of five.

196
00:08:24,763 --> 00:08:26,329
You want me to take the survey, Debby?

197
00:08:26,331 --> 00:08:28,231
Fine. I'll take the survey.

198
00:08:28,396 --> 00:08:29,472
Thank you.

199
00:08:30,391 --> 00:08:32,224
"On a scale of one to five,

200
00:08:32,249 --> 00:08:35,489
how would you rate your
overall customer experience?"

201
00:08:36,208 --> 00:08:37,674
Mmm...

202
00:08:37,676 --> 00:08:39,445
_

203
00:08:39,470 --> 00:08:40,484
Four.

204
00:08:41,380 --> 00:08:42,979
"On a scale of one to five,

205
00:08:42,981 --> 00:08:44,848
how likely are you to
purchase or lease a car

206
00:08:44,850 --> 00:08:46,149
from us in the future?"

207
00:08:46,151 --> 00:08:47,784
I would say four.

208
00:08:47,786 --> 00:08:49,853
Jacob, don't do this.

209
00:08:49,855 --> 00:08:51,521
"On a scale of one to five,

210
00:08:51,523 --> 00:08:54,839
how would you rate your
salesperson Debby Deberson?"

211
00:08:55,127 --> 00:08:56,793
Oh, God, another tough one.

212
00:08:56,795 --> 00:08:59,763
- Maybe four out of five, and submit.
- _

213
00:09:04,795 --> 00:09:06,002
Whoa. Are you okay?

214
00:09:06,004 --> 00:09:07,778
Do you understand what you've done?

215
00:09:07,803 --> 00:09:10,268
I just gave you four stars.
That's a solid B-minus.

216
00:09:10,293 --> 00:09:12,309
You just put a target on my back,

217
00:09:12,311 --> 00:09:13,543
and my front!

218
00:09:13,568 --> 00:09:16,268
You have no idea what
these people are capable of!

219
00:09:16,333 --> 00:09:19,768
I should give you one star
as a person, you bitch!

220
00:09:21,125 --> 00:09:23,359
Too bad there isn't a survey for that.

221
00:09:23,455 --> 00:09:25,188
It's been two days, and so far,

222
00:09:25,190 --> 00:09:28,525
no emails, no calls, and no texts.

223
00:09:28,527 --> 00:09:30,694
After she left, I burned all the surveys

224
00:09:30,696 --> 00:09:32,283
they mailed me on my stove.

225
00:09:32,461 --> 00:09:34,794
Was it a little dramatic? Yes.

226
00:09:34,819 --> 00:09:36,386
And that's why it felt so good.

227
00:09:36,435 --> 00:09:37,534
I don't know.

228
00:09:37,536 --> 00:09:38,868
Four out of five is pretty harsh.

229
00:09:38,870 --> 00:09:40,427
You might as well have given her a one.

230
00:09:41,573 --> 00:09:43,273
Hey, Jake, you seen Matt?

231
00:09:43,275 --> 00:09:44,574
I haven't. Sorry.

232
00:09:44,576 --> 00:09:45,794
Hold on.

233
00:09:46,078 --> 00:09:49,849
I'd recognize that knobby knee anywhere.

234
00:09:50,782 --> 00:09:51,810
Matt!

235
00:09:52,084 --> 00:09:53,550
Look at you, holed up down here

236
00:09:53,552 --> 00:09:55,251
like a little Thai boy.

237
00:09:55,253 --> 00:09:57,587
You sure have grown since
you went in the cave.

238
00:09:58,232 --> 00:09:59,388
Come on.

239
00:10:00,918 --> 00:10:03,085
You did watch the doc, right?

240
00:10:03,228 --> 00:10:06,795
Yes, John, and good job
on the recommendation.

241
00:10:06,898 --> 00:10:08,231
So what do you need?

242
00:10:08,233 --> 00:10:10,600
Well, since you loved
those Thai boys so much,

243
00:10:10,602 --> 00:10:13,782
what do you think of this boy's tie?

244
00:10:15,440 --> 00:10:16,740
I really have a lot of work to do, John.

245
00:10:16,742 --> 00:10:17,701
That can wait.

246
00:10:18,341 --> 00:10:20,141
Tell me what you think.

247
00:10:20,166 --> 00:10:21,646
Honest feedback.

248
00:10:23,511 --> 00:10:26,091
You know what? I don't like it.

249
00:10:26,618 --> 00:10:29,219
You look like Mr. Peanut,
even more than usual.

250
00:10:29,221 --> 00:10:31,254
This time, you did a bad job.

251
00:10:35,294 --> 00:10:36,224
Great.

252
00:10:44,190 --> 00:10:45,289
I'm proud of you, Matt.

253
00:10:45,314 --> 00:10:47,468
You just gave John a four out of five.

254
00:10:51,109 --> 00:10:53,810
This is it, easy win for Gracedog.

255
00:10:53,812 --> 00:10:56,212
All I have to do is
tell him "goodnight".

256
00:10:56,214 --> 00:10:58,948
A shy person wouldn't
do that, but I will,

257
00:10:58,950 --> 00:11:01,021
'cause I'm not a shy mouse.

258
00:11:01,119 --> 00:11:03,520
I'm a bull, a big, proud bull

259
00:11:03,522 --> 00:11:06,556
with a big, fat mouth
and a golden nose ring.

260
00:11:06,724 --> 00:11:09,036
Here we go!

261
00:11:09,599 --> 00:11:10,727
Good...

262
00:11:10,729 --> 00:11:12,262
- night.
- Security.

263
00:11:12,264 --> 00:11:14,164
You think I was too hard on John?

264
00:11:14,166 --> 00:11:16,666
I did really like that Thai boys doc.

265
00:11:16,668 --> 00:11:17,834
I watched it twice.

266
00:11:17,836 --> 00:11:18,934
Mr. Engelbertson?

267
00:11:20,405 --> 00:11:21,598
Phone call.

268
00:11:23,809 --> 00:11:25,608
- Hello?
- Matt, I need to see you

269
00:11:25,610 --> 00:11:27,677
in my office immediately.

270
00:11:31,016 --> 00:11:32,916
- Are you fucking kidding me?
- _

271
00:11:32,918 --> 00:11:35,418
I'll talk to you tomorrow.
John wants to see me.

272
00:11:35,420 --> 00:11:38,021
- Hi, Jacob.
- I already took the damn survey.

273
00:11:38,023 --> 00:11:39,556
Oh, we received your survey.

274
00:11:39,558 --> 00:11:41,992
Your feedback was very helpful.

275
00:11:41,994 --> 00:11:43,259
I'm calling to let you know

276
00:11:43,261 --> 00:11:45,314
that we've dealt with the situation.

277
00:11:46,682 --> 00:11:47,831
Oh. What does that mean?

278
00:11:47,833 --> 00:11:48,999
Customer satisfaction

279
00:11:49,001 --> 00:11:50,693
is our number one priority.

280
00:11:50,869 --> 00:11:52,369
That's why you can rest assured

281
00:11:52,371 --> 00:11:53,740
that Debby Deberson

282
00:11:53,765 --> 00:11:56,266
will never sell another Sun Gem...

283
00:11:56,291 --> 00:11:57,943
ever again.

284
00:11:58,543 --> 00:12:00,046
Wow. All right.

285
00:12:01,132 --> 00:12:03,246
Nice to know the system works, I guess.

286
00:12:03,248 --> 00:12:04,278
Thank you for your time.

287
00:12:07,364 --> 00:12:09,052
Hey, John, about earlier,

288
00:12:09,054 --> 00:12:10,948
I was too hard on your bowtie.

289
00:12:11,311 --> 00:12:12,331
No, Matt.

290
00:12:13,409 --> 00:12:14,464
You were right.

291
00:12:14,822 --> 00:12:16,112
I got cocky,

292
00:12:16,548 --> 00:12:19,823
and tried to pull off a bold new look.

293
00:12:20,118 --> 00:12:22,145
And I made an ass of myself.

294
00:12:22,471 --> 00:12:26,907
I was a very bad, bad, stupid boy.

295
00:12:28,206 --> 00:12:29,778
And you helped me see that.

296
00:12:30,042 --> 00:12:31,408
So I made a big change

297
00:12:31,410 --> 00:12:33,047
that's gonna help the both of us.

298
00:12:34,413 --> 00:12:35,867
This is your new desk.

299
00:12:35,892 --> 00:12:38,492
- You're a harsh mistress, Matt.
- _

300
00:12:38,850 --> 00:12:41,918
Well, technically a Matt-tress.

301
00:12:41,920 --> 00:12:43,753
A firm mattress.

302
00:12:43,755 --> 00:12:45,564
And I need you to straighten me out

303
00:12:45,566 --> 00:12:47,801
because I don't trust my chiropractor,

304
00:12:47,803 --> 00:12:49,566
that fucking crook.

305
00:12:52,864 --> 00:12:54,904
John, I'm at a loss for words.

306
00:12:55,529 --> 00:12:56,490
Great.

307
00:12:56,735 --> 00:12:58,154
We're staying late tonight.

308
00:12:58,270 --> 00:13:00,637
We're gonna be holed up
here like those Thai boys,

309
00:13:00,639 --> 00:13:02,072
except this time,

310
00:13:02,074 --> 00:13:05,470
there will be no meddling
Navy SEAL here to rescue us.

311
00:13:05,495 --> 00:13:06,761
Take a seat.

312
00:13:06,912 --> 00:13:09,212
Debby, what did you do to Jacob?

313
00:13:09,214 --> 00:13:10,780
- Nothing!
- He gave you a four.

314
00:13:10,782 --> 00:13:12,515
Four out of five is a solid B-minus.

315
00:13:12,517 --> 00:13:13,750
It might as well have been a one,

316
00:13:13,752 --> 00:13:14,985
and you know that.

317
00:13:14,987 --> 00:13:16,252
Please! Give me another chance!

318
00:13:16,277 --> 00:13:17,551
This is for Jacob.

319
00:13:17,576 --> 00:13:18,645
No!

320
00:13:20,160 --> 00:13:22,525
Debby's not dead. Just being paranoid.

321
00:13:36,454 --> 00:13:37,680
Jacob Levinson?

322
00:13:38,013 --> 00:13:39,681
Agent Roman, FBI.

323
00:13:39,945 --> 00:13:42,579
Did you purchase a Sun
Gem from that woman?

324
00:13:48,961 --> 00:13:51,112
Aren't there usually just two agents?

325
00:13:51,489 --> 00:13:53,489
That's actually a very
hurtful stereotype.

326
00:13:53,616 --> 00:13:54,648
You may not realize it,

327
00:13:54,650 --> 00:13:56,717
but what you just said is racist.

328
00:13:56,719 --> 00:13:58,652
Whatever this is, it
must be pretty serious

329
00:13:58,654 --> 00:14:00,647
for five FBI agents to show up.

330
00:14:01,109 --> 00:14:02,569
I'm sorry I'm late.

331
00:14:03,475 --> 00:14:06,260
Jacob, you purchased your
car from Debby Deberson.

332
00:14:06,262 --> 00:14:07,995
- Is that correct?
- Yes.

333
00:14:07,997 --> 00:14:09,463
And overall, how would you rate

334
00:14:09,465 --> 00:14:11,142
your car-buying experience?

335
00:14:11,167 --> 00:14:12,699
Okay, what the hell is going on?

336
00:14:12,735 --> 00:14:13,867
Do you guys work for Jupiter?

337
00:14:13,892 --> 00:14:16,869
Jacob, Debby Deberson is missing.

338
00:14:18,558 --> 00:14:20,340
When did you last see her?

339
00:14:21,056 --> 00:14:23,581
A few days ago. She came to my house.

340
00:14:24,313 --> 00:14:25,445
So she was here.

341
00:14:25,447 --> 00:14:26,914
Yeah, she kept harassing me

342
00:14:26,916 --> 00:14:28,482
to take some stupid survey,

343
00:14:28,484 --> 00:14:30,484
I gave her four out of
five, and then she left.

344
00:14:30,486 --> 00:14:33,387
Jesus Christ, you must've
really hated this lady.

345
00:14:33,389 --> 00:14:34,621
What did she do to you?

346
00:14:34,623 --> 00:14:36,390
Four out of five is a solid B-minus.

347
00:14:36,392 --> 00:14:39,559
It's our understanding that
anything less than a five

348
00:14:39,561 --> 00:14:41,080
might as well be a one.

349
00:14:41,798 --> 00:14:43,565
You guys don't think she's dead, do you?

350
00:14:43,599 --> 00:14:45,721
On the record, we don't know.

351
00:14:46,043 --> 00:14:47,534
Off the record...

352
00:14:50,039 --> 00:14:51,805
We still really aren't sure.

353
00:14:53,175 --> 00:14:54,274
So now I'm worried

354
00:14:54,276 --> 00:14:55,981
that Jupiter killed her or something.

355
00:14:56,512 --> 00:14:58,178
That's crazy, right? I mean,

356
00:14:58,180 --> 00:15:00,280
there's plenty of reasons
the FBI could be involved.

357
00:15:00,282 --> 00:15:02,282
I mean, maybe she's secretly

358
00:15:02,284 --> 00:15:03,850
a criminal mastermind or something.

359
00:15:03,852 --> 00:15:05,218
Say something, Grace.

360
00:15:05,220 --> 00:15:07,437
Contribute to the conversation.

361
00:15:07,462 --> 00:15:09,305
What do you guys think?

362
00:15:09,541 --> 00:15:10,846
I think she's dead.

363
00:15:11,397 --> 00:15:12,930
And it's because of you.

364
00:15:12,995 --> 00:15:16,163
I broke the seal! Now
keep those lips flapping.

365
00:15:16,165 --> 00:15:18,532
A four out of five is a death sentence.

366
00:15:18,534 --> 00:15:19,833
There's dead Debby blood

367
00:15:19,835 --> 00:15:22,323
all over your hideous, hairy hands.

368
00:15:22,504 --> 00:15:24,137
You're killing it, Grace!

369
00:15:24,139 --> 00:15:25,872
Bonus points for alliteration.

370
00:15:25,874 --> 00:15:27,240
- I don't know about that.
- Yeah, I'm sure

371
00:15:27,242 --> 00:15:29,276
there's a perfectly
reasonable explanation.

372
00:15:29,301 --> 00:15:30,644
Tell that to Debby.

373
00:15:30,879 --> 00:15:32,637
Oh, wait. You can't.

374
00:15:32,662 --> 00:15:34,231
Because she's dead.

375
00:15:34,483 --> 00:15:36,483
Jupiter did what they had to do.

376
00:15:36,485 --> 00:15:38,879
Jake just gave them the push.

377
00:15:38,988 --> 00:15:41,161
You were born to shine.

378
00:15:43,086 --> 00:15:46,395
So anybody watch that Thai boys doc?

379
00:15:47,794 --> 00:15:49,261
Hey, Kate?

380
00:15:49,365 --> 00:15:50,697
John thinks I'm in the bathroom,

381
00:15:50,699 --> 00:15:52,394
so I don't have much time.

382
00:15:53,102 --> 00:15:54,877
You know him pretty well, right?

383
00:15:55,571 --> 00:15:59,172
Well, we've worked side
by side for 19 years,

384
00:15:59,174 --> 00:16:01,002
so... no.

385
00:16:01,210 --> 00:16:02,809
I've done everything in my power

386
00:16:02,811 --> 00:16:04,496
to avoid getting to know John.

387
00:16:05,419 --> 00:16:07,926
Do you think I haven't
noticed what's been going on?

388
00:16:08,754 --> 00:16:10,017
This is the freest

389
00:16:10,019 --> 00:16:12,181
I have felt in years!

390
00:16:12,922 --> 00:16:14,821
John is finally leaving me alone.

391
00:16:14,823 --> 00:16:16,244
He's got you now.

392
00:16:16,425 --> 00:16:19,048
Today, I read an article at lunch,

393
00:16:19,228 --> 00:16:20,437
a full article.

394
00:16:21,683 --> 00:16:23,382
How do I make it stop?

395
00:16:23,432 --> 00:16:24,665
Oh, that's easy.

396
00:16:24,667 --> 00:16:27,000
Just go back in time,
steal him from his crib,

397
00:16:27,025 --> 00:16:29,946
undo all the repressed
trauma from his childhood.

398
00:16:30,706 --> 00:16:31,283
Or...

399
00:16:32,078 --> 00:16:33,411
you can poison him.

400
00:16:33,609 --> 00:16:35,104
But I'd suggest doing that

401
00:16:35,129 --> 00:16:37,363
over the course of a few years.

402
00:16:37,446 --> 00:16:39,346
That's what the article I read says.

403
00:16:39,548 --> 00:16:41,098
They got it to their sharpshooter.

404
00:16:41,123 --> 00:16:42,356
Top of the key.

405
00:16:42,518 --> 00:16:44,184
Pump fake, pump fake. Got him up.

406
00:16:44,186 --> 00:16:46,059
Oh. Oh!

407
00:16:46,084 --> 00:16:47,293
Nothing but net.

408
00:16:48,052 --> 00:16:49,278
You see that, Matt?

409
00:16:49,825 --> 00:16:51,058
No, I didn't.

410
00:16:51,060 --> 00:16:52,559
Well, pay attention.

411
00:16:52,561 --> 00:16:53,927
Thought you wanted my eyes on these.

412
00:16:53,929 --> 00:16:55,983
That's why God blessed
you with two eyes, Matt.

413
00:16:56,024 --> 00:16:57,091
Right?

414
00:16:57,225 --> 00:16:58,053
Look.

415
00:16:58,548 --> 00:17:00,414
Through the zone. Get off me!

416
00:17:00,502 --> 00:17:02,569
Iso, iso. Crowd roars.

417
00:17:02,571 --> 00:17:03,900
Johnny Stockton!

418
00:17:06,147 --> 00:17:07,572
Little help, Matt?

419
00:17:09,678 --> 00:17:10,751
Come on.

420
00:17:11,033 --> 00:17:12,185
Come on, John.

421
00:17:13,282 --> 00:17:14,278
There we go.

422
00:17:14,303 --> 00:17:15,703
Yep. Come on.

423
00:17:15,728 --> 00:17:17,428
Top of the key. Olympics.

424
00:17:17,453 --> 00:17:18,986
It's the Olympics now.

425
00:17:19,239 --> 00:17:20,587
Just go back in time,

426
00:17:20,589 --> 00:17:23,123
and undo all the repressed
trauma from his childhood.

427
00:17:23,125 --> 00:17:25,325
They got him. This is for your country.

428
00:17:25,327 --> 00:17:26,351
And for myself.

429
00:17:26,629 --> 00:17:28,662
Oh! Oh!

430
00:17:28,664 --> 00:17:30,359
Did you see that one, Matt?

431
00:17:31,007 --> 00:17:32,616
I did, John.

432
00:17:34,290 --> 00:17:36,841
You did a good job making that basket.

433
00:17:37,306 --> 00:17:38,451
You're a good boy.

434
00:17:38,769 --> 00:17:40,310
And a great boss.

435
00:17:40,749 --> 00:17:42,732
And you know what else, John?

436
00:17:44,179 --> 00:17:45,175
I love you.

437
00:17:48,017 --> 00:17:49,138
I'm sorry.

438
00:17:49,256 --> 00:17:50,497
What was that?

439
00:17:51,363 --> 00:17:52,849
I love you, buddy.

440
00:17:53,246 --> 00:17:54,768
And I'm so proud of you.

441
00:18:00,362 --> 00:18:02,070
God damn it, Matt.

442
00:18:02,367 --> 00:18:05,437
There's a line, and as usual,

443
00:18:05,668 --> 00:18:08,402
you use those long, repulsive legs

444
00:18:08,404 --> 00:18:10,062
to leap right over it.

445
00:18:10,639 --> 00:18:12,168
I'm your boss, for Christ sake!

446
00:18:12,358 --> 00:18:14,450
I'll say who loves who around here!

447
00:18:14,821 --> 00:18:16,821
And the only thing that I love

448
00:18:16,846 --> 00:18:19,161
is professionalism in the workplace!

449
00:18:19,548 --> 00:18:21,286
So get the fuck out!

450
00:18:21,548 --> 00:18:24,716
And you can forget about
re-watching that Thai boys doc!

451
00:18:24,741 --> 00:18:28,914
Because I'm changing the
password to Boundaries123!

452
00:18:29,189 --> 00:18:30,824
Oh, damn it. Now he knows the new one.

453
00:18:31,622 --> 00:18:33,025
You'd be surprised by how many cars

454
00:18:33,027 --> 00:18:34,382
crash into mailboxes,

455
00:18:34,628 --> 00:18:37,918
right up there with fire hydrants
and outdoor weddings.

456
00:18:37,920 --> 00:18:41,017
Fortunately, you're
covered for all the damages.

457
00:18:41,042 --> 00:18:43,797
You were smart to get
that extended warranty.

458
00:18:43,995 --> 00:18:45,005
I wasn't going to,

459
00:18:45,007 --> 00:18:47,310
but then Debby talked me into it.

460
00:18:48,307 --> 00:18:49,880
You know Debby, right?

461
00:18:52,084 --> 00:18:54,313
Yes, I knew Debby.

462
00:18:54,315 --> 00:18:56,133
Do you know what happened to her?

463
00:18:56,180 --> 00:18:59,100
The company really doesn't
want us to talk about it.

464
00:18:59,125 --> 00:19:00,742
Why not? What happened?

465
00:19:00,744 --> 00:19:03,069
I'm sorry, Jacob. I really can't say.

466
00:19:03,094 --> 00:19:06,213
But have I answered all
your questions today?

467
00:19:06,215 --> 00:19:07,972
No, you clearly haven't.

468
00:19:08,579 --> 00:19:11,310
Well, that's very unfortunate

469
00:19:11,312 --> 00:19:15,485
because customer satisfaction
is our number one priority,

470
00:19:15,487 --> 00:19:16,950
and the thing is, you're gonna receive

471
00:19:16,952 --> 00:19:18,856
- a survey about your...
- This is for Jacob.

472
00:19:18,881 --> 00:19:19,561
No!

473
00:19:19,586 --> 00:19:21,976
And anything less than a five is...

474
00:19:22,001 --> 00:19:23,396
Five out of five!

475
00:19:23,600 --> 00:19:24,943
You get a five out of five.

476
00:19:26,225 --> 00:19:27,259
Five out of five!

477
00:19:27,634 --> 00:19:30,016
I'm completely satisfied
with my experience,

478
00:19:30,018 --> 00:19:31,907
and I want everyone to know!

479
00:19:31,909 --> 00:19:33,884
Five out of five. Five out of five.

480
00:19:33,886 --> 00:19:35,736
Five out of five. Five out of five.

481
00:19:35,761 --> 00:19:37,428
Five out of five!

482
00:19:40,315 --> 00:19:41,700
Debby Deberson. Wow!

483
00:19:43,278 --> 00:19:45,786
It was not easy tracking you down.

484
00:19:46,216 --> 00:19:47,478
It's quite a game you were running,

485
00:19:47,480 --> 00:19:51,187
masquerading as the five-star employee,

486
00:19:51,189 --> 00:19:52,566
the person on the inside

487
00:19:52,568 --> 00:19:55,194
funneling cars to a ring of thieves.

488
00:19:55,944 --> 00:19:59,752
At last, we've caught the
queen of car lot larceny.

489
00:20:00,051 --> 00:20:01,735
Want to know how we finally did it?

490
00:20:01,760 --> 00:20:03,736
It was Jacob's four-star
review, wasn't it?

491
00:20:03,761 --> 00:20:04,955
No.

492
00:20:05,206 --> 00:20:06,760
Actually, it was...

493
00:20:08,184 --> 00:20:09,808
just one star.

494
00:20:09,996 --> 00:20:13,101
This was a blue 2020 Jupiter Scimitar

495
00:20:13,103 --> 00:20:16,049
that we recovered from a boat
headed to Venezuela.

496
00:20:16,074 --> 00:20:19,348
And from there, we just put
all the pieces together.

497
00:20:20,280 --> 00:20:21,368
Hey, Agent Roman?

498
00:20:21,915 --> 00:20:22,840
Yeah?

499
00:20:23,479 --> 00:20:24,520
Good job.

500
00:20:25,621 --> 00:20:26,950
Oh.

501
00:20:35,983 --> 00:20:37,362
Five out of five.

502
00:20:38,181 --> 00:20:39,354
Sorry I'm late.

503
00:20:42,936 --> 00:20:45,014
Make that six out of five.

504
00:20:55,106 --> 00:21:04,104
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