1
00:00:03,104 --> 00:00:07,049
And as we know, there is a town
in Finland called Fjuurn

2
00:00:07,050 --> 00:00:10,175
comprised entirely
of lonely people.

3
00:00:10,384 --> 00:00:14,057
Recent computers have discovered
a town in Vietnam, Huan,

4
00:00:14,173 --> 00:00:17,377
whose populace is also
romantically unattached.

5
00:00:17,560 --> 00:00:20,373
One Fjuurnian for
each single Huanian.

6
00:00:20,420 --> 00:00:24,920
Compatible ages,
interests, fetishes, peccadilli.

7
00:00:25,199 --> 00:00:28,301
- _ - Following this finding,
Fjuurn became shy.

8
00:00:28,724 --> 00:00:33,293
Every citizen blushed so much,
the temperature rose 9 degrees.

9
00:00:33,294 --> 00:00:36,927
A soft, red glow
could be seen from space.

10
00:00:37,428 --> 00:00:40,418
- _ - It was from this vantage
that astro-matchmakers

11
00:00:40,465 --> 00:00:43,129
- _ - noticed the skyline
of these two locales,

12
00:00:43,223 --> 00:00:47,785
every mountain and valley,
tower and well, house and hole

13
00:00:47,786 --> 00:00:49,918
were a perfect,
interlocking fit,

14
00:00:49,919 --> 00:00:51,970
a precise inverse of one another

15
00:00:52,025 --> 00:00:55,892
like a hot dog slipped snugly
into a set of human buns.

16
00:00:56,164 --> 00:00:57,882
Meant to be.

17
00:00:57,883 --> 00:00:59,938
- _
- One night Science got drunk

18
00:00:59,992 --> 00:01:03,172
- _ - and decided to
force fate to happen.

19
00:01:03,715 --> 00:01:08,504
They folded one over other using
cranes and a finger of skylube.

20
00:01:09,591 --> 00:01:11,435
After the carnage
of penetration,

21
00:01:11,646 --> 00:01:13,702
each subsequent municipal pump

22
00:01:13,748 --> 00:01:16,209
was hotter than that
which preceded it.

23
00:01:17,458 --> 00:01:21,384
The next morning as the sun
scorched off the fog of abandon,

24
00:01:21,385 --> 00:01:24,257
Huan awoke alone
to discover that Fjuurn

25
00:01:24,258 --> 00:01:26,672
had secretly
taped the whole thing.

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It was all over the net.

27
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Humiliated, Huan threw itself
off the edge of the earth.

28
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But Fjuurn was taping that, too,

29
00:01:36,778 --> 00:01:39,810
so they'd always have
proof of Huan's love...

30
00:01:39,963 --> 00:01:42,579
something to give
Fjuurn the confidence

31
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to finally love itself.

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00:01:45,003 --> 00:01:49,611
www.subtitulamos.tv

33
00:01:49,631 --> 00:01:54,370
And yet Dr Ton Bntu extracted
a lateral infarction

34
00:01:54,432 --> 00:01:55,984
in the optic chiasm

35
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so Eban Dylfyl,
blind since birth,

36
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could see
the world for the first time.

37
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I am going to remove
the bandages, Mr. Dylfyl.

38
00:02:04,457 --> 00:02:07,434
- Are you ready?
- I can't wait! C'mon, c'mon, c'mon!

39
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You gotta be kidding me.
That's it?

40
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Can you see?

41
00:02:14,800 --> 00:02:15,786
Yeah but I just always

42
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pictured
the world was gonna be, like,

43
00:02:17,223 --> 00:02:18,440
beautiful, ya know?

44
00:02:18,441 --> 00:02:20,227
You need more time
to get used to it...?

45
00:02:20,228 --> 00:02:22,402
I don't wanna get used to this.

46
00:02:22,403 --> 00:02:24,665
It's worser than trash.

47
00:02:24,666 --> 00:02:26,450
Its freakin' common.

48
00:02:27,625 --> 00:02:30,786
Well, maybe try nature.

49
00:02:31,771 --> 00:02:33,413
Lame.
Ughk.

50
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My eyes're gonna puke.

51
00:02:37,463 --> 00:02:39,332
I'm sorry,
but this is the world.

52
00:02:39,333 --> 00:02:43,079
Well, you need to fix it now
or I'm gonna get you fired!

53
00:02:43,126 --> 00:02:45,256
You'll be on the streets
eating cardboard dirt!

54
00:02:45,318 --> 00:02:47,584
No sauce.
No beverage.

55
00:02:47,618 --> 00:02:48,582
Like I ate!

56
00:02:48,613 --> 00:02:52,259
A Dr's sacred mission is to do
everything in his power

57
00:02:52,260 --> 00:02:54,478
to avoid losing his job.

58
00:02:57,286 --> 00:03:00,701
Aw, now this is more like it.

59
00:03:06,273 --> 00:03:08,477
After he fingered
the seam of sight,

60
00:03:08,602 --> 00:03:13,061
Eban managed to escape into the
realm that lives behind vision.

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00:03:14,344 --> 00:03:14,992
Yes!

62
00:03:15,117 --> 00:03:17,455
There is no
survival skill greater

63
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than man's ability to save face.

64
00:03:21,201 --> 00:03:24,812
Having true pride is never
letting anyone know

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00:03:24,813 --> 00:03:26,075
they got to you.

66
00:03:26,076 --> 00:03:27,945
Check out this piece of trash.

67
00:03:27,946 --> 00:03:31,471
So when Gil Minugm got tripped
by a bully,

68
00:03:31,472 --> 00:03:34,044
he just kept falling
as if he meant to do it.

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00:03:34,161 --> 00:03:36,476
As long as he pretended
to tumble,

70
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he kept his self-respect.

71
00:03:39,175 --> 00:03:42,034
He committed to his pride
all thru life.

72
00:03:42,396 --> 00:03:45,873
Dignity flowed from him
like body water.

73
00:03:46,117 --> 00:03:48,488
- _
- He slipsy-won the city marathon

74
00:03:48,489 --> 00:03:51,837
and became the first man
to fall up Mt. Everest.

75
00:03:51,892 --> 00:03:55,861
- _ - He managed to meet
and injure fun, new people.

76
00:03:56,254 --> 00:03:58,846
- _ - He fell into a relationship
with a girl

77
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who he could express
his pride up in every position,

78
00:04:02,212 --> 00:04:05,432
from dignified doggy
to respectful cowgirl.

79
00:04:05,517 --> 00:04:07,769
Even butt stuff.

80
00:04:07,770 --> 00:04:11,034
_

81
00:04:11,209 --> 00:04:12,842
Wasn't that a lovely ceremony?

82
00:04:13,156 --> 00:04:16,179
Sometimes I think you're falling
on purpose

83
00:04:16,252 --> 00:04:18,692
to avoid grappling
with life's real challenges.

84
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What? No.

85
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I just happen to be falling.

86
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See?

87
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When you say that it diminishes
validity

88
00:04:26,430 --> 00:04:28,919
from people
who are really falling, like me.

89
00:04:28,920 --> 00:04:32,498
You're not reallyfalling
any more than I am.

90
00:04:32,721 --> 00:04:34,588
We're both just going
through the motions.

91
00:04:35,361 --> 00:04:37,449
I need to be with someone
who can grab life

92
00:04:37,450 --> 00:04:38,713
by the scruff of the ass.

93
00:04:40,541 --> 00:04:44,283
After their first fight, a
couple can slow its faux bumble

94
00:04:44,353 --> 00:04:47,068
and finally hold each other
in its gaze,

95
00:04:47,069 --> 00:04:49,506
forever safe, invincible.

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00:04:52,484 --> 00:04:54,484
_

97
00:04:58,958 --> 00:05:01,005
You! Are you a relative
of the victim?

98
00:05:01,083 --> 00:05:04,481
That, uh, gunk there is my wife.

99
00:05:04,536 --> 00:05:06,392
The only way these folks survive

100
00:05:06,393 --> 00:05:08,446
is if I sew them together
right now.

101
00:05:08,469 --> 00:05:10,439
Can you dothat?

102
00:05:10,440 --> 00:05:13,534
I trained as a surgeon
specializing in hybrids.

103
00:05:13,579 --> 00:05:15,052
Lousy job market means

104
00:05:15,053 --> 00:05:16,566
that I gotta drive
a Goddamn ambulance

105
00:05:16,636 --> 00:05:17,466
to make ends meet.

106
00:05:17,520 --> 00:05:18,840
Do you want her to die?!

107
00:05:18,841 --> 00:05:19,855
No! No!

108
00:05:19,925 --> 00:05:21,319
It's just, I don't know...

109
00:05:21,320 --> 00:05:22,409
Make a decision!

110
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Grab life by the scruff
of the ass!

111
00:05:25,063 --> 00:05:26,852
Okay.
Do it. Do it!

112
00:05:26,898 --> 00:05:29,648
Good now stand back,
pray, and cheer me on.

113
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"Slab, Slab, Slab!"

114
00:05:32,027 --> 00:05:33,340
They called me "Slab"
in med school,

115
00:05:33,417 --> 00:05:35,196
and I don't have long
to tell you this story.

116
00:05:35,251 --> 00:05:36,540
C'mon, motivate me!

117
00:05:36,859 --> 00:05:42,164
Slab... Slab...
Slab... Slab...

118
00:05:42,241 --> 00:05:44,212
Slab... Slab...
Slab... Slab...

119
00:05:44,213 --> 00:05:46,170
So did you have lunch yet?

120
00:05:46,171 --> 00:05:49,103
Um, uh, no.
Slab... Slab... Slab... Slab...

121
00:05:49,134 --> 00:05:51,468
Well get yerself something,
menu's on the side.

122
00:05:51,498 --> 00:05:54,319
Wait, this... this ambulance
is a food truck, too?

123
00:05:54,521 --> 00:05:57,373
- Slab... Slab... Slab... Slab...
- I told you... hybrids.

124
00:05:57,531 --> 00:06:00,837
Now I recommend the Chi-Loco-
Lo-Mein-Vein Dragon Bowl.

125
00:06:00,838 --> 00:06:03,971
They're little burritos rolled
all the way into noodles!

126
00:06:03,972 --> 00:06:06,103
It's a pretty fun Mexican take

127
00:06:06,104 --> 00:06:07,987
on a traditional Chinese
lo mein.

128
00:06:08,083 --> 00:06:09,977
Isn't that a clever lil combo?

129
00:06:09,978 --> 00:06:12,611
Kinda how your wife's gonna end
up if she pulls through!

130
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Get used to combos!

131
00:06:14,097 --> 00:06:16,463
I don't really have an appetite
right now!

132
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Well, family of patients
get 10% off.

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I don't know.
Scruff of ass.

134
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Can ya tell me
about the feelawfel?

135
00:06:24,528 --> 00:06:27,342
Okay, that one is our take on
the falafel, obviously.

136
00:06:27,343 --> 00:06:30,301
We do it with raw onions
since you're crying, anyway.

137
00:06:30,302 --> 00:06:32,826
And if your loved one dies,
you get to keep the cup.

138
00:06:32,827 --> 00:06:34,968
So you walk away a winner
no matter what happens.

139
00:06:35,006 --> 00:06:36,194
I'll...
I'll do one of those.

140
00:06:36,217 --> 00:06:37,647
Okay. Gotta say it through
the window there.

141
00:06:38,449 --> 00:06:40,137
One feel-awfel.

142
00:06:40,214 --> 00:06:42,095
Okay, you're gonna want to get
the grief sauce

143
00:06:42,096 --> 00:06:42,711
on this, I assume.

144
00:06:42,765 --> 00:06:44,664
You're gonna cook it, too?

145
00:06:44,665 --> 00:06:47,587
I focus best when I'm doing
two things at once.

146
00:06:47,972 --> 00:06:50,670
This is the most
impressive thing

147
00:06:50,671 --> 00:06:52,628
I've ever witnessed.

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00:06:52,629 --> 00:06:55,239
Slab!
Slab! Slab!

149
00:06:55,240 --> 00:06:56,560
Order up!

150
00:06:59,288 --> 00:07:01,626
Incredible! How'd you
get the edges so, uh...

151
00:07:01,719 --> 00:07:03,465
Crispy on the outside?

152
00:07:03,466 --> 00:07:06,099
I flash fry 'em
before broiling.

153
00:07:06,382 --> 00:07:10,327
Mmm!
Slab! Slab! Sla...

154
00:07:10,386 --> 00:07:14,339
Aaand operation done, order up!

155
00:07:15,057 --> 00:07:17,174
She's gonna make
a full recovery.

156
00:07:17,175 --> 00:07:20,961
It's kinda my fun take on saving
your wife's life, that's all.

157
00:07:20,962 --> 00:07:22,142
Up top!

158
00:07:23,584 --> 00:07:24,878
What happened?

159
00:07:24,879 --> 00:07:27,527
You were in a terrible accident.

160
00:07:27,697 --> 00:07:29,378
What are you, like, eating?

161
00:07:30,058 --> 00:07:33,120
It's seriously the most
delicious thing I've ever had.

162
00:07:33,284 --> 00:07:34,980
Here, try a bite.

163
00:07:35,192 --> 00:07:37,065
I don't understand
what's going on.

164
00:07:37,066 --> 00:07:41,582
What's going on is I grabbed
life by the scruff of that ass.

165
00:07:43,755 --> 00:07:45,607
Mmm.
What smells amazing?

166
00:07:48,859 --> 00:07:51,348
When something scrumptious
blindsides our senses,

167
00:07:51,371 --> 00:07:54,995
we can see the seam
of sight speak its peace.

168
00:07:54,996 --> 00:07:56,649
To warn us...

169
00:07:56,650 --> 00:07:59,801
Vision is violence.

170
00:08:00,349 --> 00:08:02,167
What you looking at, twerp?

171
00:08:02,229 --> 00:08:04,004
You a tough guy?
Huh?

172
00:08:04,005 --> 00:08:05,005
You a tough guy?

173
00:08:05,214 --> 00:08:07,224
- I don't know.
- Whatchu mean?

174
00:08:07,225 --> 00:08:09,444
Are you a tough guy?

175
00:08:09,445 --> 00:08:10,533
I mean, it's complicated.

176
00:08:10,534 --> 00:08:12,882
I'm not sure
I can categorize myself.

177
00:08:12,883 --> 00:08:16,190
Okay, well here, let me
help you figure it out.

178
00:08:16,191 --> 00:08:19,454
Now, are you a tough guy?

179
00:08:19,455 --> 00:08:22,631
I mean, we all have different
facets to ourselves.

180
00:08:22,632 --> 00:08:24,807
One part may be tough,
aggressive, dominant,

181
00:08:24,808 --> 00:08:26,822
while another side
is introspective and hesitant.

182
00:08:26,877 --> 00:08:30,221
If I'm being honest,
I'm a complex amalgam of both.

183
00:08:30,684 --> 00:08:33,184
OK then,
I'll separate it for ya.

184
00:08:35,581 --> 00:08:38,550
Now the both of yous can hash
it out amongst yourselves.

185
00:08:38,644 --> 00:08:39,886
Losers!

186
00:08:40,436 --> 00:08:42,220
What you looking at,
lil half bitch?

187
00:08:42,282 --> 00:08:43,744
Nothing.
I just...

188
00:08:44,045 --> 00:08:46,437
Nothing, I just...
Nothing, I just... I just...

189
00:08:46,438 --> 00:08:48,227
Shut up.
Gimme yer lunch money, now.

190
00:08:48,289 --> 00:08:50,617
But, like,
isn't it ourlunch money?

191
00:08:51,858 --> 00:08:54,328
You gonna be a little bitch,
you bitch?

192
00:08:54,490 --> 00:08:56,185
That's not a simple question.

193
00:08:56,263 --> 00:08:59,695
You know, It'd be erroneous to
adhere to one broad label

194
00:08:59,741 --> 00:09:02,279
when Jungian scholars
agree a personality

195
00:09:02,280 --> 00:09:06,501
comprises infinite gradations
of 7 archetypical traits.

196
00:09:06,502 --> 00:09:08,677
Here's your 7 component
archetypes right here.

197
00:09:08,678 --> 00:09:11,462
It requires great
strength to analytically

198
00:09:11,463 --> 00:09:15,075
octosect ourselves into
sub-sets of neuroticism,

199
00:09:15,076 --> 00:09:17,207
agreeableness, extroversion,

200
00:09:17,208 --> 00:09:19,601
openness, conscientiousness,

201
00:09:19,602 --> 00:09:21,717
warmth, and assertiveness.

202
00:09:21,763 --> 00:09:22,968
Severed*

203
00:09:22,969 --> 00:09:25,869
Now dat I done helped you
truly know yerself fer free,

204
00:09:25,870 --> 00:09:28,611
whydoncha cough up
that lunch money as payment?

205
00:09:31,440 --> 00:09:34,181
I know who I am. I'm rich!

206
00:09:34,182 --> 00:09:36,879
His Alpha side breezed
through life,

207
00:09:36,880 --> 00:09:40,460
grabbing whatever
its half-heart desired.

208
00:09:40,491 --> 00:09:44,321
Tragically, his beta half
was forced to develop

209
00:09:44,322 --> 00:09:48,543
a personality and sharpen
his intellect to survive.

210
00:09:48,544 --> 00:09:52,591
Both sides grew up utterly happy
and secretly miserable

211
00:09:52,592 --> 00:09:54,941
because each suspected
the other

212
00:09:54,942 --> 00:09:58,640
- was actually happy
and not utterly pretending. - _

213
00:09:58,641 --> 00:10:02,339
- _ - They developed a sick fixation
upon each other.

214
00:10:02,340 --> 00:10:04,801
Each side snuck to
the other one's house

215
00:10:04,857 --> 00:10:07,285
to creep on
their other side sleeping.

216
00:10:07,563 --> 00:10:11,131
Both were horrified to discover
their other side not home

217
00:10:11,132 --> 00:10:13,311
but probably out having
real fun.

218
00:10:14,395 --> 00:10:17,746
- _ - They had too much pride
to get back together.

219
00:10:17,747 --> 00:10:21,228
But one afternoon, when they had
both moped off to brood

220
00:10:21,229 --> 00:10:24,832
in a meadow, they inexplicably
felt the re-connection

221
00:10:24,934 --> 00:10:26,085
they had longed for.

222
00:10:26,123 --> 00:10:28,561
They savored the sensation.

223
00:10:29,367 --> 00:10:32,892
As long as they remained
in Eban's healing gaze,

224
00:10:32,893 --> 00:10:35,111
held whole in the stitch
of his sight,

225
00:10:35,112 --> 00:10:39,081
they felt they could do
absolutely anything at all

226
00:10:39,720 --> 00:10:42,946
So that's exactly
what they did.

227
00:10:47,603 --> 00:10:53,387
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