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www.subtitulamos.tv

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_

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I wish I wasn't
such a piece of a-shit.

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I wish I had a son

5
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to watch "Villardia's
got talent" with-a.

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A son! That's it!

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I know, I'll make a-one.

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? How hard can it be
to make a son for me? ?

9
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? I need a family member
to watch "vgt" ?

10
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So, what will I call you?

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I know! Your name is Pinocchio!

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You want to watch
"Villardia's got talent"?

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Pinocchio?

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Are you going to answer me?

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Who am I kidding?
He's not a-real!

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I'm just an old fool.

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Hello, pop tart.

18
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Who the hell are you?

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I'm a magical fairy and I'm here
to grant your biggest wish.

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You're going to give-a me a son?

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You got it, sugar nuts!

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I give you, Pinocchio,
the gift of life.

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Hiya, pop, where's the slop?

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My god! A real...

25
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Hey, this isn't a real boy.

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Screw you, ya dingleberry
poo poo face.

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Well, he's not real yet.

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Now here's the challenge...

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You have three days

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- to turn Pinocchio
- _

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into a sweet, kind,
and polite child.

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And if you can do that,
I'll turn him into a real boy.

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But...

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if you can't turn him
into a good boy,

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I'll send you both straight to hell

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where your anuses
will be punished and tortured

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by all the nastiest demons
forever and ever.

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That sounds like
a good deal to me.

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Okay.

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Pinocchio, remember... be good!

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Oh, my god!

42
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Bad pinocchio!

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I'll a-teach you
to be a good a-boy.

44
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? Go to school and do you work ?

45
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? Pay attention
and don't be a jerk ?

46
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? Wipe three times
after you take a poo ?

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? Put on a clean shirt
and a-shine your shoes ?

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I'm the devil! I'm the devil!

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Pinocchio!

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Whadda you do?
Ya gotta be a good boy

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or we're gonna go straight
to hell and our rigatonis

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are gonna be
a-leonardo dicaprio'd.

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I'm-a trying to teach ya!

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See ya, mother fucker.

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That's a-my Prius.

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I'm a-bleeding.

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Wake up, papa.

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I'm sorry I stabbed you.

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I'll be a good boy from now on.

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My little boy.

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I love you, papa.

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What time is it?

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I've been asleep for two days!

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Pinocchio!

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You killed a-this
poor old woman.

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She was trying to stop me
from being a naughty boy.

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_

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Don't you understand-a?

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You have to be good or else-a
your poor old a-papa

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is going to get his-a
sphincterini gabagooled in hell!

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Whatever. Get your big fat fart
wagon off the couch.

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P-ster needs to sleepster.

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Okay, you a-sleep while I
a-clean up your brutal crime.

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_

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Villardia PD! Open up!

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Good evening, officer.

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How can I help you
on this-a fine...

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We got a report that some
jack-a-ninny in a Prius

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was running over old ladies around here.

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You wouldn't happen to know anything
about that, would ya, pops?

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Oh, no.

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I've-a just been here
with my son

83
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a-watching
"Villardia's got a-talent."

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I thought you lived here
all alone.

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My son's in town
visiting from out of state.

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Cute kid.

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All right, Mr. Gelato.

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Just, one more thing.

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Where's the baby blue Prius
that's registered in your name?

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I don't see it
in your driveway here.

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Oh, I, uh...

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I gave it away.

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To the charity.

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To the... Kars for kids.

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What a wonderful gesture.

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So, I guess I'll be seeing you.

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One more thing.

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Did Kars for kids
give you an LC-99 form?

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You know, the form you get for any
charitable donation over $5,000?

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You have that, right?

101
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Yes, the LC-99...

102
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I know it put it around here
someplace.

103
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I've been so busy a-lately

104
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with the holidays coming up.

105
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I'll a-mail it to you.

106
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I'm gonna need to see it
now, sir.

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I'll wait.

108
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You must a-be so busy
with the holidays.

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You know, the holidays
that are a-coming up soon?

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You wanna cup-a-da Pellegrino?

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The paperwork, Mr. Gelato.

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Oh, yeah, the paperwork.

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It's around here somewhere.

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Here's the paperwork.

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It's-a-the holidays.

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Excuse me, sir?

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The paperwork?

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It's-a-the holidays?

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Turn around and put your hands
behind your back.

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No! But the pizza, the pasta,
the pepperoni...

121
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Mamma mia!

122
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You smell that, Gelato?

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Smells like bacon.

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_

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Pinocchio!

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Now you've really got us
in a pickle-di-pizza.

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Now, help your poor papa
hide-a the body.

128
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Okay, but first we gotta go
to sack-con.

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What's a-sack-con?

130
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Sack-con these nuts, Gelato!

131
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A-holy cannoli!

132
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You're an ass-a-hole!

133
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Come over here
and grab his legs.

134
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So? Are you feeling
like a good boy?

135
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Up yours!

136
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Help! Help!

137
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I've a-failed miserably.

138
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Our spaghettios will be
fonzarelli'd in hell.

139
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Hello again,
Gelato and Pinocchio.

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Hiya, fairy.

141
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Has it been
three whole days already?

142
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It has indeed.

143
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So, Pinocchio,
are you a good boy now?

144
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I definitely, no doubt, 100%... am.

145
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_

146
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Hong Kong Phooey!

147
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What have you done?!

148
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Why you always gotta
murder the people?

149
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I'm sorry, Gelato.

150
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You're right.
I'm tired of being bad.

151
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I want to be a good boy and do
what's right from now on.

152
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Really?

153
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100%.

154
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That's a-what I wanted
to hear this whole time.

155
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Help me bury this body

156
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and we'll a-start
a new life a-together!

157
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Okay, dad!

158
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You take that body outside

159
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and I'll clean up in here.

160
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My perfect little boy.

161
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Villardia PD.

162
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I'd like to be a good boy

163
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and report a triple homicide.

164
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My dad's burying
one of the bodies as we speak.

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We're sending officers
over right now.

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Stand by, son!

167
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Sucker!

168
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Villardia PD! Put your hands up!

169
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Get your ass on the ground,
mother fucker.

170
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We're gonna shoot you!

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Pinocchio!

172
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Son, are you prepared to testify against
your father in the court of law?

173
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I sure am.

174
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Does this mean I'm a good boy?

175
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Pinocchio, you're
the goodest boy ever.

176
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I did it!

177
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I'm a real boy!

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- Hooray!
- Hooray!

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