1
00:00:00,068 --> 00:00:05,068
- Synced and corrected by Firefly -
- www.addic7ed.com -

2
00:00:22,676 --> 00:00:24,317
This is bullshit!

3
00:00:24,319 --> 00:00:26,508
- This is a kangaroo court.
- No way.

4
00:00:26,510 --> 00:00:28,438
We got a real judge and everything.

5
00:00:28,440 --> 00:00:30,208
Hey, Judge, get in here.

6
00:00:30,210 --> 00:00:33,148
All rise for me.

7
00:00:33,150 --> 00:00:36,548
- Bane's the judge?
- I promise you'll get a fair shake.

8
00:00:36,550 --> 00:00:37,818
I am unbiased.

9
00:00:37,820 --> 00:00:39,888
Well, he's actually telling the truth,

10
00:00:39,890 --> 00:00:42,605
which is really annoying,
so I took it upon myself

11
00:00:42,607 --> 00:00:45,737
to provide you with
Gotham's top litigator.

12
00:00:49,500 --> 00:00:50,612
Oh, we're so fucked.

13
00:00:50,614 --> 00:00:53,298
Let's not judge a lawyer
by the fact he's a bat.

14
00:00:53,300 --> 00:00:57,738
The defendants are charged with
the murder of Oswald Cobblepot

15
00:00:57,740 --> 00:01:00,338
and other stuff.

16
00:01:00,340 --> 00:01:01,908
Counselor Man-Bat.

17
00:01:01,910 --> 00:01:04,380
How do your clients plead?

18
00:01:07,950 --> 00:01:10,748
_

19
00:01:10,750 --> 00:01:11,750
Yeah, we're fucked.

20
00:01:18,700 --> 00:01:20,898
And then, she bit
The Penguin's nose off.

21
00:01:20,900 --> 00:01:25,538
She bit The Penguin's nose off.

22
00:01:25,540 --> 00:01:26,898
Mm, mm, mm.

23
00:01:26,900 --> 00:01:29,938
Is Harley Quinn who definitely did that

24
00:01:29,940 --> 00:01:31,638
in the courtroom today?

25
00:01:31,640 --> 00:01:33,338
Yeah, that's Harley Quinn.

26
00:01:33,340 --> 00:01:36,608
- _
- Does anyone speak bat?

27
00:01:36,610 --> 00:01:38,648
I want to sustain or overrule,

28
00:01:38,650 --> 00:01:40,578
but it's indecipherable.

29
00:01:40,580 --> 00:01:43,548
For my last witness, I call...

30
00:01:43,550 --> 00:01:44,918
Poison Ivy!

31
00:01:46,390 --> 00:01:48,458
Ooh, and they're friends.

32
00:01:48,460 --> 00:01:50,628
This is going to be saucy.

33
00:01:50,630 --> 00:01:52,218
Yeah.

34
00:01:52,220 --> 00:01:54,090
Ive, blame it all on me,
okay? You had my back

35
00:01:54,092 --> 00:01:56,668
no matter what stupid messes
I've gotten myself into.

36
00:01:56,670 --> 00:01:59,538
For once, let me be the one
who does something for you.

37
00:01:59,540 --> 00:02:00,938
You have a whole life ahead of you,

38
00:02:00,940 --> 00:02:02,938
- I mean, you're engaged.
- But you and I are a team.

39
00:02:02,940 --> 00:02:05,338
Ive, please, I wouldn't
be able to live with myself

40
00:02:05,340 --> 00:02:06,410
if you went down for me.

41
00:02:07,680 --> 00:02:10,848
You hate people, is that correct?

42
00:02:10,850 --> 00:02:13,718
- Yes.
- But you don't hate Harley Quinn, do you?

43
00:02:13,720 --> 00:02:16,848
You partnered with her, your only friend

44
00:02:16,850 --> 00:02:19,388
and helped her plan and execute

45
00:02:19,390 --> 00:02:21,658
the murder of the Injustice League.

46
00:02:26,600 --> 00:02:28,698
Yeah, we did it, okay?

47
00:02:28,700 --> 00:02:31,298
We teamed up to kill
your pathetic asses,

48
00:02:31,300 --> 00:02:34,638
'cause you deserved it and one
day, we're gonna finish the job.

49
00:02:34,640 --> 00:02:35,738
Ivy!

50
00:02:37,670 --> 00:02:39,948
Your Honor, given the testimony,

51
00:02:39,950 --> 00:02:42,284
I request that you find the defendants

52
00:02:42,286 --> 00:02:44,066
guilty on all counts!

53
00:02:44,068 --> 00:02:46,378
_

54
00:02:46,380 --> 00:02:51,380
I hereby sentence them to life!

55
00:02:52,350 --> 00:02:53,718
In prison, of course.

56
00:02:56,790 --> 00:02:58,998
What the hell are we doing in the sewer?

57
00:02:59,000 --> 00:03:00,758
Smells like shit down here.

58
00:03:00,760 --> 00:03:02,968
Wait. That's me.

59
00:03:02,970 --> 00:03:05,068
My God, I told you three times.

60
00:03:05,070 --> 00:03:06,668
We need to stop Ratcatcher,

61
00:03:06,670 --> 00:03:08,768
he's using the tunnels to
move weapons across Gotham.

62
00:03:08,770 --> 00:03:10,218
Ratcatcher, right.

63
00:03:10,220 --> 00:03:13,308
Living underground, these
criminals have hit rock bottom.

64
00:03:15,080 --> 00:03:17,308
- Gordon, are you drunk?
- I have a high tolerance.

65
00:03:17,310 --> 00:03:20,378
And I have a low tolerance
for evasive answers.

66
00:03:20,380 --> 00:03:22,988
"I have a low tolerance
for evasive answers".

67
00:03:22,990 --> 00:03:24,918
I know what I'm doing, all right?

68
00:03:24,920 --> 00:03:27,358
I was putting away scum
while you were filling up

69
00:03:27,360 --> 00:03:29,658
your bat diaper with stinky bat doodies.

70
00:03:34,460 --> 00:03:36,328
I've seen this stuff on the dark web.

71
00:03:36,330 --> 00:03:39,068
Okay, I'll circle around
and block the exit.

72
00:03:39,070 --> 00:03:40,998
Wait for my signal.

73
00:03:41,000 --> 00:03:42,868
Taking orders from a cheerleader.

74
00:03:42,870 --> 00:03:44,910
I used to be a damn good cop.

75
00:03:47,910 --> 00:03:50,108
Oh! Aah!

76
00:03:50,110 --> 00:03:51,310
Huh?

77
00:03:52,880 --> 00:03:57,388
Swarm, my children! Swarm!

78
00:03:59,520 --> 00:04:01,388
Oh, shit!

79
00:04:01,390 --> 00:04:04,660
Shit, shit, shit!

80
00:04:05,930 --> 00:04:08,828
Get it off!

81
00:04:08,830 --> 00:04:10,498
- Oh, come on.
- Thanks.

82
00:04:15,070 --> 00:04:17,470
That's not mine.

83
00:04:21,340 --> 00:04:22,948
Why the hell did you do that, Ive?

84
00:04:22,950 --> 00:04:24,748
Harls, I'm not gonna
let you rot in prison

85
00:04:24,750 --> 00:04:26,918
while I'm kiting around
the world on my honeymoon.

86
00:04:26,920 --> 00:04:28,678
But no one even knows you're kidnapped,

87
00:04:28,680 --> 00:04:29,988
you could've led the rescue.

88
00:04:29,990 --> 00:04:31,648
Maybe called it a mini-moon.

89
00:04:31,650 --> 00:04:34,018
Come on, we can break out
of Arkham in our sleep.

90
00:04:38,660 --> 00:04:40,528
Uh, the hell is this?

91
00:04:40,530 --> 00:04:41,971
Your new home.

92
00:04:41,973 --> 00:04:44,498
- What the shit are you doing here?
- I'm not just a judge.

93
00:04:44,500 --> 00:04:46,638
I am also a warden.

94
00:04:46,640 --> 00:04:51,413
Welcome to he Pena Duro North
Correctional and Rehabilitation facility.

95
00:04:51,415 --> 00:04:54,008
Affectionately known as The Pit.

96
00:04:54,010 --> 00:04:56,948
Listen, Bane, we're not
going in your dumb hole.

97
00:04:56,950 --> 00:04:58,808
So either free us or kill us.

98
00:04:58,810 --> 00:05:00,048
Okay.

99
00:05:02,620 --> 00:05:05,418
Oh, shit!

100
00:05:05,420 --> 00:05:06,858
Oh, they'll be fine.

101
00:05:06,860 --> 00:05:08,958
I set up padding at the bottom.

102
00:05:08,960 --> 00:05:11,758
Just more dramatic, you know,
to see 'em drop like that.

103
00:05:14,560 --> 00:05:16,598
While I was born in darkness,

104
00:05:16,600 --> 00:05:20,798
here at Pena Duro North, we're
bringing people into the light.

105
00:05:20,800 --> 00:05:25,438
We try to cultivate
positive thinking in The Pit.

106
00:05:25,440 --> 00:05:27,592
Teach our guests to redirect

107
00:05:27,594 --> 00:05:30,448
aggressive energies
like maiming and killing

108
00:05:30,450 --> 00:05:32,478
into something more productive.

109
00:05:32,480 --> 00:05:34,878
Holy crap, is that Killer Croc?

110
00:05:34,880 --> 00:05:36,218
See for yourself.

111
00:05:36,220 --> 00:05:39,048
- Waylon.
- Oh, hey, Harley, Ivy.

112
00:05:39,050 --> 00:05:41,188
I was working on a new water color.

113
00:05:41,190 --> 00:05:43,628
I call this one "Reed in the Water".

114
00:05:43,630 --> 00:05:45,558
His name is Reed and, uh...

115
00:05:45,560 --> 00:05:48,077
He's in the water, yeah, we get it.

116
00:05:48,079 --> 00:05:49,708
What the fuck is wrong with you?

117
00:05:49,710 --> 00:05:51,338
I'm working out my shit.

118
00:05:51,340 --> 00:05:53,468
There's a talent show tomorrow

119
00:05:53,470 --> 00:05:56,068
to showcase what
everyone's been working on.

120
00:05:56,070 --> 00:05:58,365
I'd like you both to participate.

121
00:05:58,367 --> 00:05:59,917
- She'll never do it.
- I won't do it.

122
00:05:59,919 --> 00:06:02,608
Here we are, home sweet home.

123
00:06:02,610 --> 00:06:04,808
You're probably wondering to yourself,

124
00:06:04,810 --> 00:06:06,978
"Hey, Bane, why no door?"

125
00:06:06,980 --> 00:06:09,548
Because where would you escape to?

126
00:06:09,550 --> 00:06:12,090
You are in a pit!

127
00:06:14,190 --> 00:06:16,988
Oh, my, who caused this catastrophe?

128
00:06:16,990 --> 00:06:19,858
In The Pit, your bed must be made daily.

129
00:06:19,860 --> 00:06:23,268
A tidy room is the key to a tidy mind.

130
00:06:23,270 --> 00:06:25,898
Now, bring it in, bring
it in, my darlings.

131
00:06:25,900 --> 00:06:27,638
- Don't fucking touch me.
- I will murder you.

132
00:06:27,640 --> 00:06:29,938
I will see you two in painting class.

133
00:06:29,940 --> 00:06:31,838
Winking, I'm winking.

134
00:06:31,840 --> 00:06:34,508
Shit, Harls, I mean, how the hell
are we gonna get out of here?

135
00:06:34,510 --> 00:06:35,760
I don't know, beanstalk us up.

136
00:06:35,762 --> 00:06:37,678
There's no plants!
There's no plants in sight.

137
00:06:37,680 --> 00:06:40,048
Oh, my God, oh, my God,
we're gonna be stuck in here forever.

138
00:06:40,050 --> 00:06:41,808
I mean, who's gonna
protect the rainforest?

139
00:06:41,810 --> 00:06:43,785
- Swamp Thing.
- Who'll defend the Great Barrier Reef?

140
00:06:43,787 --> 00:06:45,859
- Aquaman.
- Who's gonna write letters to the network

141
00:06:45,861 --> 00:06:48,218
when they're trying to decide whether they
should renew Love It or List It?

142
00:06:48,220 --> 00:06:50,988
- Some loser.
- Yeah, exactly, and Kite Man...

143
00:06:50,990 --> 00:06:52,828
What about Kite Man?
I finally find somebody

144
00:06:52,830 --> 00:06:54,558
that I actually want to marry

145
00:06:54,560 --> 00:06:55,928
and now I can't even do it.

146
00:06:55,930 --> 00:06:58,128
- Fuck!
- Listen, we're gonna escape

147
00:06:58,130 --> 00:06:59,798
and you are gonna walk down that aisle.

148
00:06:59,800 --> 00:07:01,238
You're right. You're right.

149
00:07:01,240 --> 00:07:02,298
We're gonna get out of here.

150
00:07:02,300 --> 00:07:03,908
- Hey, girls.
- Oh, shit.

151
00:07:03,910 --> 00:07:06,278
Just dropping off some
welcome caps I've knitted.

152
00:07:06,280 --> 00:07:08,830
It gets mighty chilly at night.

153
00:07:12,880 --> 00:07:14,078
Oh, pass the mayo.

154
00:07:14,080 --> 00:07:16,118
So, how'd the crime fighting go?

155
00:07:16,120 --> 00:07:17,988
Eh, it's not working out with Batgirl.

156
00:07:17,990 --> 00:07:19,888
She just doesn't have what it takes,

157
00:07:19,890 --> 00:07:22,618
I might have to fly solo.

158
00:07:22,620 --> 00:07:24,658
Dad, we need to talk
about your drinking.

159
00:07:24,660 --> 00:07:26,228
Ah, it's great, loosens me up.

160
00:07:26,230 --> 00:07:28,028
Um, okay,

161
00:07:28,030 --> 00:07:30,568
this is super hard for me,
so I'm just gonna say it.

162
00:07:30,570 --> 00:07:32,768
You are a problematic drinker.

163
00:07:32,770 --> 00:07:35,908
A problematic drinker and
former cop turned vigilante.

164
00:07:35,910 --> 00:07:38,138
A person can be two things,
or did you not know that?

165
00:07:38,140 --> 00:07:39,908
Trust me, Dad, I know.

166
00:07:39,910 --> 00:07:42,078
Right now, I'm telling you
you need to clean yourself up.

167
00:07:42,080 --> 00:07:44,678
Gotham needs you at your best.

168
00:07:44,680 --> 00:07:45,948
I'm at my best.

169
00:07:45,950 --> 00:07:47,463
Always have been, always will be.

170
00:07:47,465 --> 00:07:49,264
If you won't stop drinking for Gotham,

171
00:07:49,266 --> 00:07:50,588
do it for me.

172
00:07:50,590 --> 00:07:52,188
It hurts me to see you like this.

173
00:07:52,190 --> 00:07:54,118
Ah. Oh, Barbara.

174
00:07:55,890 --> 00:07:57,790
- Get down!
- Oh, crap!

175
00:07:59,600 --> 00:08:03,068
Hey, Gordo, I heard you've
been playing cop again.

176
00:08:03,070 --> 00:08:05,598
Trying to move in on my weapons sales.

177
00:08:05,600 --> 00:08:08,338
Dent. Ratcatcher's working for you?

178
00:08:08,340 --> 00:08:11,138
The whole city works
for me, hadn't you heard?

179
00:08:11,140 --> 00:08:14,110
New New Gotham is mine.

180
00:08:15,940 --> 00:08:18,178
Ah, you wanna play rough?

181
00:08:18,180 --> 00:08:21,778
I should've killed you back
at the station months ago.

182
00:08:21,780 --> 00:08:24,248
And tonight, I fix my mistake.

183
00:08:24,250 --> 00:08:25,320
Barbara, we need to...

184
00:08:26,290 --> 00:08:27,790
Barbara?

185
00:08:30,960 --> 00:08:33,298
I would watch the light leave their eyes

186
00:08:33,300 --> 00:08:36,968
and know that their
last thought was fear.

187
00:08:36,970 --> 00:08:40,298
But now I imagine myself
in the bubble of calm

188
00:08:40,300 --> 00:08:43,068
and the urge to kill goes away.

189
00:08:46,840 --> 00:08:49,278
- Why aren't you clapping?
- Because this is stupid.

190
00:08:49,280 --> 00:08:51,878
Look, Bane, we wanna change.

191
00:08:51,880 --> 00:08:54,818
We really do, but it's just too...

192
00:08:54,820 --> 00:08:58,988
depressing in this very dark, dank pit.

193
00:08:58,990 --> 00:09:01,988
I don't know, maybe if you
transfer us to Arkham...

194
00:09:01,990 --> 00:09:06,128
Arkham is for the criminally insane.

195
00:09:06,130 --> 00:09:09,028
The Pit is for the criminally capable.

196
00:09:10,526 --> 00:09:15,138
But I will let you in on a little
secret to lift your spirits.

197
00:09:15,140 --> 00:09:18,268
Tomorrow's talent show
will have a special guest.

198
00:09:18,270 --> 00:09:20,717
Mr. George Lopez.

199
00:09:20,719 --> 00:09:22,378
Can you believe it?

200
00:09:22,380 --> 00:09:25,418
Yeah, he's choppering
down for a ten-minute set.

201
00:09:25,420 --> 00:09:29,148
Mostly new material, but
probably some old hits.

202
00:09:29,150 --> 00:09:30,620
Okay, this is how we escape.

203
00:09:30,622 --> 00:09:31,649
I sign up for the talent show...

204
00:09:31,651 --> 00:09:33,932
- Lopez choppers in.
- We watch his hilarious set.

205
00:09:33,934 --> 00:09:36,426
That pokes fun at the
idiosyncrasies of a Latino family.

206
00:09:36,428 --> 00:09:38,688
Then I do a tight five
that incites a prison riot.

207
00:09:38,690 --> 00:09:41,028
Which pulls the guards
away from the chopper...

208
00:09:41,030 --> 00:09:43,628
Wait, sorry, how is standup
comedy gonna incite a riot?

209
00:09:43,630 --> 00:09:45,398
I tell a bunch of jokes
that piss people off.

210
00:09:45,400 --> 00:09:47,738
- Nice.
- Right? You and me are getting on that chopper.

211
00:09:47,740 --> 00:09:49,469
We fly out and you're exchanging "I dos"

212
00:09:49,471 --> 00:09:52,208
with Kite Man in no time.

213
00:09:52,210 --> 00:09:54,038
Where are ya hiding, Gordon?

214
00:09:54,040 --> 00:09:56,348
Let's end this real nice and quick.

215
00:09:56,350 --> 00:09:59,078
I got a dental appointment
in the early a.m.

216
00:09:59,080 --> 00:10:01,348
Lot of gum work, you know?

217
00:10:01,350 --> 00:10:02,918
Do you hear me, Gordon?

218
00:10:02,920 --> 00:10:05,788
I took your station, I took your city,

219
00:10:05,790 --> 00:10:10,140
and now I'm taking your life.

220
00:10:12,160 --> 00:10:13,200
Oh.

221
00:10:15,460 --> 00:10:17,928
I'm sorry.

222
00:10:17,930 --> 00:10:20,138
Let's get this over with, Harvey.

223
00:10:20,140 --> 00:10:22,168
Glad you came to your senses.

224
00:10:22,170 --> 00:10:23,938
Better to go out like a man

225
00:10:23,940 --> 00:10:26,278
rather than begging
like one of those cats

226
00:10:26,280 --> 00:10:27,978
that thinks it's a dog.

227
00:10:27,980 --> 00:10:30,978
- Any last words?
- Tell my daughter...

228
00:10:30,980 --> 00:10:35,780
- I love her.
- Tell her yourself.

229
00:10:46,300 --> 00:10:48,798
You and the bat hussy set me up.

230
00:10:48,800 --> 00:10:50,428
I only brought two goons.

231
00:10:50,430 --> 00:10:53,038
I thought this was
gonna be a two-goon job.

232
00:10:53,040 --> 00:10:54,938
That's on me. I'll be back.

233
00:10:54,940 --> 00:10:56,508
- Why the hell did you do that?
- What?

234
00:10:56,510 --> 00:10:57,879
What'd you save me for?

235
00:10:57,881 --> 00:10:59,978
You know what I am? I'm dead
weight, yesterday's news.

236
00:10:59,980 --> 00:11:01,118
Dime store sushi.

237
00:11:01,120 --> 00:11:02,338
I'll just get in your way again.

238
00:11:02,340 --> 00:11:04,148
Hey. Hey!

239
00:11:04,150 --> 00:11:06,048
Ah, there was a swig and a half left.

240
00:11:06,050 --> 00:11:07,878
Stop feeling sorry for yourself.

241
00:11:07,880 --> 00:11:09,148
Why?

242
00:11:09,150 --> 00:11:10,848
You don't need me,
Gotham doesn't need me.

243
00:11:10,850 --> 00:11:12,317
My own daughter thinks I'm a joke.

244
00:11:12,319 --> 00:11:13,918
That's not true.

245
00:11:13,920 --> 00:11:16,328
You're a good man, Jim Gordon.

246
00:11:16,330 --> 00:11:17,988
- You inspired me.
- Ha!

247
00:11:17,990 --> 00:11:19,928
Oh, yeah? Says the girl with bat ears.

248
00:11:19,930 --> 00:11:21,428
Batman's your inspiration.

249
00:11:21,430 --> 00:11:23,400
He inspired my costume.

250
00:11:24,400 --> 00:11:26,298
My dad inspired me.

251
00:11:26,300 --> 00:11:28,408
- Barbara?
- That's right.

252
00:11:28,410 --> 00:11:30,302
I'm Batgirl, Dad.

253
00:11:30,304 --> 00:11:33,434
You're the one that's
been protecting Gotham.

254
00:11:36,040 --> 00:11:37,850
That's my girl.

255
00:11:38,980 --> 00:11:41,048
And Killer Croc, he's so ugly.

256
00:11:41,050 --> 00:11:43,848
- How ugly is he?
- He's so ugly that when I met him,

257
00:11:43,850 --> 00:11:45,918
I thought his asshole
was doing the talking.

258
00:11:45,920 --> 00:11:47,019
Hey-oh!

259
00:11:47,021 --> 00:11:49,028
Kind of feels like a low
hanging fruit there, but,

260
00:11:49,030 --> 00:11:50,590
it'll probably kill
with these dumb shits.

261
00:11:50,592 --> 00:11:52,958
Harley, I see that you're doing stand up

262
00:11:52,960 --> 00:11:55,028
after Lopez.

263
00:11:55,030 --> 00:11:57,198
Whoa, what is this?

264
00:11:57,200 --> 00:11:58,928
You failed to make your bed.

265
00:11:58,930 --> 00:12:00,341
Oh, shit, yeah, sorry about that.

266
00:12:00,343 --> 00:12:04,268
Sorry doesn't cut it, I
was very clear on the rules.

267
00:12:04,270 --> 00:12:06,208
I cannot play favorites.

268
00:12:06,210 --> 00:12:10,078
Harley may not participate
in the talent show.

269
00:12:10,080 --> 00:12:12,378
I'll make my bed, you weirdo. God.

270
00:12:12,380 --> 00:12:15,548
I wish your wave of
enthusiasm had crested earlier.

271
00:12:15,550 --> 00:12:18,388
- Ivy, you have to do my set.
- What? No.

272
00:12:18,390 --> 00:12:20,288
I can't tell jokes
in front of strangers.

273
00:12:20,290 --> 00:12:22,588
Yes, you can, you'll be a riot.

274
00:12:22,590 --> 00:12:25,428
A riot, I need you to start a...

275
00:12:25,430 --> 00:12:27,558
- Stop, yes, I got it.
- Do it, Ivy.

276
00:12:27,560 --> 00:12:31,268
I guess I'm going up after Lopez.

277
00:12:31,270 --> 00:12:32,400
Bold.

278
00:12:35,910 --> 00:12:37,568
This is gonna be easy to break out of.

279
00:12:37,570 --> 00:12:41,594
- There is no door.
- But there is a Cheryl.

280
00:12:43,250 --> 00:12:46,248
Ugh, hi, Cheryl, you're really
gonna make me kill you to escape?

281
00:12:46,250 --> 00:12:48,120
Well, you can try.

282
00:12:49,050 --> 00:12:52,018
I'm Cheryl.

283
00:12:53,620 --> 00:12:55,118
If she attempts to escape,

284
00:12:55,120 --> 00:12:58,188
force her to join the show choir!

285
00:13:01,631 --> 00:13:03,968
Hello. Ah!

286
00:13:03,970 --> 00:13:06,368
And welcome to the first annual

287
00:13:06,370 --> 00:13:09,138
Live from The Pit talent show.

288
00:13:09,140 --> 00:13:11,208
We have a lot of great acts tonight,

289
00:13:11,210 --> 00:13:15,340
but first, who wants to
see some close-up magic?

290
00:13:17,450 --> 00:13:20,978
And then I said, "From now on,
we're home schooling you".

291
00:13:20,980 --> 00:13:22,618
So whatever we don't know,

292
00:13:22,620 --> 00:13:24,398
you don't know.

293
00:13:24,400 --> 00:13:26,618
Like, when did the Korean
War start? I don't know.

294
00:13:26,620 --> 00:13:29,130
And neither do you.

295
00:13:32,460 --> 00:13:33,958
Okay, that's my time.

296
00:13:33,960 --> 00:13:36,028
Thank you, The Pit. Good night.

297
00:13:37,400 --> 00:13:40,300
Shit. This plan is so stupid.

298
00:13:43,610 --> 00:13:45,168
You've got this, Ivy.

299
00:13:45,170 --> 00:13:47,238
Cheryl, listen, I'm getting past you,

300
00:13:47,240 --> 00:13:49,822
so either I do and you're
alive, or I do and you're not.

301
00:13:49,824 --> 00:13:50,978
What do you say?

302
00:13:53,480 --> 00:13:55,390
Oh, Jesus.

303
00:13:58,120 --> 00:14:00,460
Uh... Hello.

304
00:14:02,160 --> 00:14:04,458
Uh, I see Killer Croc is here.

305
00:14:04,460 --> 00:14:06,558
He's so ugly, when we met,

306
00:14:06,560 --> 00:14:08,598
I thought his asshole was talking to me.

307
00:14:08,600 --> 00:14:10,568
Oh, come on, it's a skin condition.

308
00:14:10,570 --> 00:14:12,138
Ah, that's below the belt.

309
00:14:12,140 --> 00:14:13,665
How about Victor Zsasz, okay?

310
00:14:13,667 --> 00:14:15,068
Oh, boy, here we go.

311
00:14:15,070 --> 00:14:16,269
The tally marks on his head

312
00:14:16,271 --> 00:14:18,068
make him look like a Peanuts character.

313
00:14:18,070 --> 00:14:19,678
Oh, she's no Lopez.

314
00:14:19,680 --> 00:14:21,338
Hey, you just got Ivy'd.

315
00:14:21,340 --> 00:14:24,008
- You suck!
- I know, right? I suck.

316
00:14:24,010 --> 00:14:26,018
Blah! Do you guys wanna riot?

317
00:14:26,020 --> 00:14:29,018
Why? This is a safe space.

318
00:14:31,220 --> 00:14:32,600
Come on, Zsasz, you're not even

319
00:14:32,602 --> 00:14:34,418
like a little pissed off about that?

320
00:14:34,420 --> 00:14:36,328
You just got Ivy'd. Bleh.

321
00:14:36,330 --> 00:14:38,588
Just start shanking, people.

322
00:14:38,590 --> 00:14:41,628
- People, shank.
- If I could make a constructive criticism.

323
00:14:41,630 --> 00:14:44,128
Your joke directed at
me was reference-heavy,

324
00:14:44,130 --> 00:14:46,038
and if might, a bit derivative.

325
00:14:46,040 --> 00:14:48,538
What the shit is this?
This should not be hard,

326
00:14:48,540 --> 00:14:51,408
you guys are killers, kill each other.

327
00:15:10,230 --> 00:15:13,300
I'm getting to that chopper!

328
00:15:15,200 --> 00:15:16,798
- Shit!
- Shit.

329
00:15:16,800 --> 00:15:18,768
Good night, The Pit.

330
00:15:18,770 --> 00:15:20,498
What a bunch of locos.

331
00:15:20,500 --> 00:15:22,098
And after I defeated Riddler,

332
00:15:22,100 --> 00:15:25,138
- I knew what I had to do.
- I can't believe it.

333
00:15:25,140 --> 00:15:26,578
I... You were her!

334
00:15:26,580 --> 00:15:28,678
And she was you while I was me.

335
00:15:28,680 --> 00:15:30,148
Yeah, I even slipped up

336
00:15:30,150 --> 00:15:31,478
and called you Dad a few times.

337
00:15:31,480 --> 00:15:34,330
But you were pretty... Drunk.

338
00:15:37,790 --> 00:15:39,488
Dad, stop.

339
00:15:39,490 --> 00:15:40,818
Are you gonna lend a hand

340
00:15:40,820 --> 00:15:43,228
or is Batgirl too cool to help her dad

341
00:15:43,230 --> 00:15:45,758
in a montage where we
skip past the hard parts

342
00:15:45,760 --> 00:15:47,298
of beating an alcohol addiction

343
00:15:47,300 --> 00:15:48,828
and cut to the part where I'm clean?

344
00:15:48,830 --> 00:15:50,930
Get over here.

345
00:15:54,040 --> 00:15:55,408
Welcome back, Dad.

346
00:15:55,410 --> 00:15:57,168
You're finally home.

347
00:15:57,170 --> 00:15:59,338
No, there's only one place that's home.

348
00:15:59,340 --> 00:16:01,808
The Gotham City Police Department.

349
00:16:01,810 --> 00:16:03,648
But that's Two-Face's lair.

350
00:16:03,650 --> 00:16:05,248
I'm taking it back.

351
00:16:05,250 --> 00:16:06,618
- Wanna know why?
- Why?

352
00:16:06,620 --> 00:16:10,220
'Cause I'm a damn good cop.

353
00:16:25,640 --> 00:16:29,238
So, um, I actually came
on stage to start a riot.

354
00:16:29,240 --> 00:16:30,309
- Huh?
- What?

355
00:16:30,311 --> 00:16:33,338
I was gonna use the riot
as a diversion to escape

356
00:16:33,340 --> 00:16:35,708
on George Lopez's helicopter.

357
00:16:35,710 --> 00:16:38,618
Now that I say it out loud, I
realize how stupid it sounds.

358
00:16:40,150 --> 00:16:41,910
I mean, I'm never getting
out of here, right?

359
00:16:44,190 --> 00:16:47,658
My entire life I've been cut
off from my feelings, you know?

360
00:16:47,660 --> 00:16:50,688
I was living in an emotional pit,

361
00:16:50,690 --> 00:16:52,659
but I liked it that way, you know.

362
00:16:52,661 --> 00:16:54,598
'Cause it was safe and secure,

363
00:16:54,600 --> 00:16:57,228
and no one ever put
a knit hat on me, you know?

364
00:16:59,430 --> 00:17:02,087
I guess that I accepted
that being lonely was,

365
00:17:02,089 --> 00:17:03,568
you know, was my thing.

366
00:17:03,570 --> 00:17:05,268
And then something happened.

367
00:17:05,270 --> 00:17:08,308
I made friends, I got engaged.

368
00:17:08,310 --> 00:17:09,730
Thank you.

369
00:17:09,732 --> 00:17:11,508
I joined the mile high Kite club.

370
00:17:11,510 --> 00:17:13,179
Yeah, yeah.

371
00:17:13,181 --> 00:17:15,518
I'm going to give you a piece of
advice about sex at 10,000 feet.

372
00:17:15,520 --> 00:17:16,748
Don't do it into the wind.

373
00:17:18,190 --> 00:17:19,418
And I was thinking about it,

374
00:17:19,420 --> 00:17:21,788
I'm like, was I happy?

375
00:17:21,790 --> 00:17:23,528
I was really happy.

376
00:17:23,530 --> 00:17:26,598
You know, it's like, I crawled
out of my emotional pit.

377
00:17:26,600 --> 00:17:28,358
Yeah.

378
00:17:28,360 --> 00:17:30,328
And so then, what happens?

379
00:17:30,330 --> 00:17:32,568
- Where did the universe put me?
- The Pit.

380
00:17:32,570 --> 00:17:35,198
That's right, The Pit.

381
00:17:35,200 --> 00:17:37,168
And no matter how much
we change down here.

382
00:17:37,170 --> 00:17:39,538
No matter how many times
we make our goddamn bed

383
00:17:39,540 --> 00:17:41,408
or pass the talking stick.

384
00:17:41,410 --> 00:17:44,208
We're still stuck in this Pit.

385
00:17:44,210 --> 00:17:47,518
And with Bane of all people.

386
00:17:47,520 --> 00:17:48,818
This guy.

387
00:17:48,820 --> 00:17:51,688
I relate.

388
00:17:51,690 --> 00:17:53,618
Wow, she's got a great point there.

389
00:17:53,620 --> 00:17:56,428
I did all this hard work
to get myself out of one pit

390
00:17:56,430 --> 00:17:58,588
just to end up in another.

391
00:17:58,590 --> 00:18:00,958
Life's just one big pit

392
00:18:00,960 --> 00:18:03,498
that none of us are
ever gonna get out of.

393
00:18:03,500 --> 00:18:08,238
One big fucking inescapable pit.

394
00:18:08,240 --> 00:18:11,670
And that is where we are stuck forever.

395
00:18:12,810 --> 00:18:14,478
Damn, Ivy's right.

396
00:18:14,480 --> 00:18:16,208
We gotta get out of The Pit.

397
00:18:16,210 --> 00:18:18,278
Yeah, come on, guys,

398
00:18:18,280 --> 00:18:20,818
we're a talented group, if we
work together, we can escape.

399
00:18:20,820 --> 00:18:22,850
Also if you don't
chip in, I'll stab you.

400
00:18:24,820 --> 00:18:27,258
That was amazing, you
spoke from your heart,

401
00:18:27,260 --> 00:18:29,855
- you started a riot!
- About 30 seconds too late,

402
00:18:29,857 --> 00:18:31,826
let's face it, George Lopez
is never coming back,

403
00:18:31,828 --> 00:18:33,097
I bet they hardly met his quote.

404
00:18:33,099 --> 00:18:35,428
Harley, I really blew it.

405
00:18:35,430 --> 00:18:36,630
Or maybe not.

406
00:18:45,940 --> 00:18:49,008
- Here's the plan, we go on the roof...
- Blah, blah, blah.

407
00:18:49,010 --> 00:18:50,748
Daddy's got this.

408
00:18:50,750 --> 00:18:52,350
Hey!

409
00:19:16,470 --> 00:19:18,408
You still got this?

410
00:19:19,710 --> 00:19:21,680
Yeah! Yeah, yeah. All good.

411
00:19:25,020 --> 00:19:27,718
Honey, I'm home.

412
00:19:29,420 --> 00:19:31,920
You get a shiv. You get
a shiv. You get a shiv.

413
00:19:35,530 --> 00:19:40,528
Hey, Ivy, it's clear you
made a breakthrough in The Pit.

414
00:19:40,530 --> 00:19:43,968
How about you come back and
continue to work on yourself?

415
00:19:43,970 --> 00:19:45,998
Perhaps a vision board?

416
00:19:46,000 --> 00:19:48,768
- I have some inspo.
- Ah, shove it, Bane.

417
00:19:48,770 --> 00:19:51,368
Yeah, don't take credit
for her emotional growth.

418
00:19:52,980 --> 00:19:55,780
Fuck this, I shall rise!

419
00:20:00,920 --> 00:20:02,420
Uh-oh, that's not good.

420
00:20:06,020 --> 00:20:09,620
We're not gonna make it.

421
00:20:12,390 --> 00:20:13,390
Hold on.

422
00:20:16,830 --> 00:20:20,568
No one escapes The Pit!

423
00:20:24,340 --> 00:20:26,118
Damn it, Bane.

424
00:20:26,120 --> 00:20:27,990
Shit, shit, shit!

425
00:20:30,780 --> 00:20:32,378
What, are you gonna write me a ticket?

426
00:20:32,380 --> 00:20:34,220
A ticket to hell.

427
00:20:37,850 --> 00:20:39,858
You still doing okay?

428
00:20:39,860 --> 00:20:42,030
Yep.

429
00:20:43,990 --> 00:20:44,990
Ah!

430
00:20:49,870 --> 00:20:52,420
In the soft spot.

431
00:21:04,380 --> 00:21:06,448
What's happening?

432
00:21:06,450 --> 00:21:09,750
I'm back. That's what.

433
00:21:16,397 --> 00:21:18,788
You cannot run from
your problems, Harley.

434
00:21:18,790 --> 00:21:21,758
Hate weighs you down.

435
00:21:21,760 --> 00:21:25,098
Only love sets us free.

436
00:21:25,100 --> 00:21:27,068
- Ivy.
- No.

437
00:21:27,070 --> 00:21:28,798
- It's okay.
- Don't, don't do this.

438
00:21:28,800 --> 00:21:31,808
Have a good life, get
married, make babies.

439
00:21:31,810 --> 00:21:33,078
Name them Harley.

440
00:21:33,080 --> 00:21:35,008
- The girls and boys.
- Harley?

441
00:21:35,010 --> 00:21:37,448
See? It totally works.

442
00:21:37,450 --> 00:21:39,148
You know I love you.

443
00:21:39,150 --> 00:21:40,500
Bye, Ive.

444
00:22:10,550 --> 00:22:12,048
Hi!

445
00:22:12,050 --> 00:22:14,120
We did it.

446
00:22:23,804 --> 00:22:26,804
- Synced and corrected by Firefly -
- www.addic7ed.com -