1 00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:04,795 ? It seems today that all you see ? 2 00:00:04,796 --> 00:00:08,174 ? Is violence in movies and sex on TV ? 3 00:00:08,175 --> 00:00:11,886 ? But where are those good old-fashioned values ? 4 00:00:11,887 --> 00:00:14,847 ? On which we used to rely? ? 5 00:00:14,848 --> 00:00:18,142 ? Lucky there's a family guy ? 6 00:00:18,143 --> 00:00:21,604 ? Lucky there's a man who positively can do ? 7 00:00:21,605 --> 00:00:23,064 ? All the things that make us ? 8 00:00:23,065 --> 00:00:24,690 ? Laugh and cry ? 9 00:00:24,691 --> 00:00:30,155 ? He's... a... Fam... ily... Guy! ? 10 00:00:31,073 --> 00:00:34,075 - Synced and corrected by AlexandreMT - - www.addic7ed.com - 11 00:00:34,076 --> 00:00:36,327 All right. Empty school. 12 00:00:36,328 --> 00:00:39,288 Time to Shining my way through the halls. 13 00:00:50,926 --> 00:00:53,928 Principal Shepherd, where is everyone?! 14 00:00:53,929 --> 00:00:57,056 Principal Shepherd's not here, 15 00:00:57,057 --> 00:00:59,016 Miss Griffin. 16 00:00:59,017 --> 00:01:00,685 Why are you talking like that? 17 00:01:00,686 --> 00:01:02,019 Sorry. That was Tony, 18 00:01:02,020 --> 00:01:03,521 the little boy who lives in my mouth. 19 00:01:03,522 --> 00:01:04,939 Why are you here? It's skip day. 20 00:01:04,940 --> 00:01:07,233 It's skip day? Nobody told me. 21 00:01:07,234 --> 00:01:10,875 She's unpopular and unattractive. 22 00:01:10,876 --> 00:01:12,573 Tony! 23 00:01:17,077 --> 00:01:20,204 Hello?! Chris? 24 00:01:20,205 --> 00:01:22,540 Did you know it was skip day? 25 00:01:22,541 --> 00:01:24,835 Mom? Dad? 26 00:01:30,591 --> 00:01:32,375 Hello? 27 00:01:32,376 --> 00:01:34,802 - Mom? Where are you guys? - Who is this? 28 00:01:34,803 --> 00:01:37,061 It's Meg. Where is everyone? 29 00:01:37,062 --> 00:01:39,748 Well, this can't be Meg. She's with us here at the pier. 30 00:01:39,749 --> 00:01:41,888 - Who is that? - Someone who says she's Meg. 31 00:01:41,889 --> 00:01:42,895 Give me that. 32 00:01:42,896 --> 00:01:46,105 Okay, Meg, if this is you, what's your birthday? 33 00:01:46,106 --> 00:01:47,565 March 23. 34 00:01:47,566 --> 00:01:49,400 I have no idea if that's correct. 35 00:01:49,401 --> 00:01:50,860 Good day, sir. 36 00:01:50,861 --> 00:01:52,653 Sorry about that, everyone. 37 00:01:52,654 --> 00:01:56,116 Now let's get back to the fair and enjoy our March 23. 38 00:02:08,170 --> 00:02:10,129 The usual, please. 39 00:02:10,130 --> 00:02:12,256 Here ya are... Ladies' seven on the left, 40 00:02:12,257 --> 00:02:13,838 and men's 11 on the right. 41 00:02:13,839 --> 00:02:15,426 I just need a license. 42 00:02:15,427 --> 00:02:17,136 Thanks. 43 00:02:17,137 --> 00:02:19,848 Oh! And happy birthday! 44 00:02:32,444 --> 00:02:33,820 Yes! 45 00:02:44,790 --> 00:02:47,959 We have not updated those. 46 00:02:51,588 --> 00:02:53,172 Good evening. I'm Tom Tucker. 47 00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:55,299 Coming up, I find even more sand 48 00:02:55,300 --> 00:02:58,552 on my body from a beach toilet I used a week ago. 49 00:02:58,553 --> 00:03:01,138 But first, tragedy strikes close to home, 50 00:03:01,139 --> 00:03:03,516 as a car crash near my apartment claims the life 51 00:03:03,517 --> 00:03:05,059 of a local teen girl. 52 00:03:05,060 --> 00:03:06,977 The victim's identity is being withheld 53 00:03:06,978 --> 00:03:08,938 pending notification of the family. 54 00:03:11,024 --> 00:03:12,900 Hey, buddy. 55 00:03:12,901 --> 00:03:15,695 What brings you around at this late hour with your uniform on 56 00:03:15,696 --> 00:03:18,155 and your hat held mournfully against your chest? 57 00:03:18,156 --> 00:03:21,742 Peter, Lois, it pains me above the waist 58 00:03:21,743 --> 00:03:23,411 to tell you that Meg is dead. 59 00:03:23,412 --> 00:03:24,995 - What?! - What are you talking about? 60 00:03:24,996 --> 00:03:26,205 Meg's right here. 61 00:03:29,695 --> 00:03:32,360 You know, it's weird that didn't happen on the pier all day. 62 00:03:32,361 --> 00:03:34,338 Or when we rented that convertible. 63 00:03:34,339 --> 00:03:35,923 How did this happen?! 64 00:03:35,924 --> 00:03:38,509 She got in a car wreck, and was burned beyond recognition, 65 00:03:38,510 --> 00:03:41,095 and I leveled up on Fortnite this weekend, 66 00:03:41,096 --> 00:03:43,681 but you probably only care about the first two things. 67 00:03:43,682 --> 00:03:46,035 Oh, dear God, no! 68 00:03:46,036 --> 00:03:49,230 All we found was Meg's driver's license at the scene. 69 00:03:51,606 --> 00:03:54,942 It had her Quiznos punch card stuck to the back. 70 00:03:54,943 --> 00:03:58,237 Your little angel was one stamp away from a free sub, 71 00:03:58,238 --> 00:04:00,990 which only adds to this horrific tragedy. 72 00:04:00,991 --> 00:04:02,366 It's actually pretty impressive, 73 00:04:02,367 --> 00:04:05,619 because the card was only issued three days ago. 74 00:04:05,620 --> 00:04:08,247 Usually one of the guys would swipe a thing like this, 75 00:04:08,248 --> 00:04:10,916 use it on the way home, but I snagged it for ya. 76 00:04:10,917 --> 00:04:13,085 Thought Meg's family ought to be the ones 77 00:04:13,086 --> 00:04:15,045 to enjoy the free sandwich. 78 00:04:15,046 --> 00:04:17,840 Again, I'm very sorry. 79 00:04:21,720 --> 00:04:23,137 Oh, hang on. 80 00:04:23,138 --> 00:04:24,972 Oh, they told the family? Great! 81 00:04:24,973 --> 00:04:27,850 The girl killed near my apartment was Meg Griffin. 82 00:04:27,851 --> 00:04:29,894 What? I'm not dead! 83 00:04:29,895 --> 00:04:31,729 She was burned beyond recognition 84 00:04:31,730 --> 00:04:33,731 but identified by her driver's license. 85 00:04:33,732 --> 00:04:35,816 156 pounds. 86 00:04:35,817 --> 00:04:37,235 Yikes. 87 00:04:37,236 --> 00:04:40,237 Wait. Did you give my ID to the wrong girl? 88 00:04:40,238 --> 00:04:44,242 Sorry. Them shoe spray fumes made me all goofy in my head. 89 00:04:47,078 --> 00:04:49,897 I'm still sober. This ain't cheatin'! 90 00:04:49,898 --> 00:04:51,916 Oh, this is me being sober! 91 00:04:53,502 --> 00:04:55,419 So I guess I'm dead. 92 00:04:55,420 --> 00:04:57,589 And no one cares. 93 00:04:59,633 --> 00:05:01,133 Again, for those of you 94 00:05:01,134 --> 00:05:03,220 in a new scene: Meg Griffin dead. 95 00:05:40,507 --> 00:05:43,013 Lois, can you believe these seats? 96 00:05:43,014 --> 00:05:44,343 Front row! 97 00:05:44,344 --> 00:05:47,346 I hope the priest pulls me up on stage and dances with me. 98 00:05:47,347 --> 00:05:50,683 When I was hastily relocated to this parish a week ago, 99 00:05:50,684 --> 00:05:52,893 the last thing I thought I'd have to do is 100 00:05:52,894 --> 00:05:55,813 stand before you on such a sad occasion. 101 00:05:55,814 --> 00:05:57,398 A family losing a child is like 102 00:05:57,399 --> 00:05:59,900 a Trivial Pursuit wheel losing a pie piece. 103 00:05:59,901 --> 00:06:02,862 And you have to keep reminding everyone playing the game, 104 00:06:02,863 --> 00:06:06,156 "Don't forget. I already got 'Entertainment'." What a pain. 105 00:06:06,157 --> 00:06:09,202 Your first speaker... Principal Shepherd. 106 00:06:10,412 --> 00:06:12,830 Meg Griffin was an honest man, 107 00:06:12,831 --> 00:06:15,207 a kind man, a man who knew how... 108 00:06:16,537 --> 00:06:18,002 Oh, my stars! 109 00:06:18,003 --> 00:06:20,004 I have nothing. 110 00:06:20,005 --> 00:06:21,922 Kind of feel bad. There's nobody here. 111 00:06:21,923 --> 00:06:23,841 I know. We're not even here. 112 00:06:27,012 --> 00:06:28,888 This was the right decision. 113 00:06:28,889 --> 00:06:31,932 Hey, Chris, I'm super sorry your sister is dead. 114 00:06:31,933 --> 00:06:34,393 Mwah. 115 00:06:34,394 --> 00:06:36,729 If there's anything we can do to help you 116 00:06:36,730 --> 00:06:38,272 during your time of need... 117 00:06:38,273 --> 00:06:39,773 - Stamps. - What? 118 00:06:39,774 --> 00:06:41,400 Stamps. I need stamps. 119 00:06:41,401 --> 00:06:43,742 Okay, you got it. 120 00:06:44,696 --> 00:06:47,948 Wow. Are girls coming on to me because my sister died? 121 00:06:47,949 --> 00:06:49,909 Cool! 122 00:06:49,910 --> 00:06:52,411 God, I wish it was Joe in that box. 123 00:06:52,412 --> 00:06:53,871 I do, too, Bon. 124 00:06:53,872 --> 00:06:55,873 Oh. Did I say that out loud? 125 00:06:55,874 --> 00:06:58,292 No, but at this point, I know what you're thinking. 126 00:06:58,293 --> 00:07:00,170 It'll be soon, babe. 127 00:07:03,715 --> 00:07:05,382 Unbelievable. 128 00:07:05,383 --> 00:07:07,217 There's hardly anyone here. 129 00:07:07,218 --> 00:07:09,053 Ugh. Well, that's it. 130 00:07:09,054 --> 00:07:12,043 I'm off to a new town to start a new life. 131 00:07:12,044 --> 00:07:13,426 Ooh. Sorry. 132 00:07:13,427 --> 00:07:16,519 Don't you know what a rosary on a doorknob means?! 133 00:07:30,659 --> 00:07:34,286 Siri, play "Kiss From a Rose" by Seal. 134 00:07:45,217 --> 00:07:47,466 I hope everyone enjoys tonight's dinner. 135 00:07:49,010 --> 00:07:51,095 It... it was Meg's favorite. 136 00:07:52,931 --> 00:07:55,140 There, there, Lois. Stop your crying. 137 00:07:55,141 --> 00:07:57,142 Stop it. 138 00:07:57,143 --> 00:07:59,103 Please stop. Stop. 139 00:07:59,104 --> 00:08:01,866 Stop it. Stop crying. 140 00:08:01,867 --> 00:08:03,357 Stop crying. 141 00:08:03,358 --> 00:08:05,943 Stop crying. Stop. 142 00:08:05,944 --> 00:08:07,628 Before we eat, 143 00:08:07,629 --> 00:08:10,073 would anyone like to say something about Meg? 144 00:08:12,617 --> 00:08:16,389 Okay, I feel all of you looking at me, so here goes. 145 00:08:16,390 --> 00:08:18,330 Meg, wherever you are, 146 00:08:18,331 --> 00:08:20,708 I hope that you're with Bubba, and I want you to know 147 00:08:20,709 --> 00:08:22,626 that Lieutenant Dan is walking around... 148 00:08:22,627 --> 00:08:24,044 Is this from Forrest Gump? 149 00:08:24,045 --> 00:08:26,463 I miss you, Meg. 150 00:08:26,464 --> 00:08:27,965 Stop it, Brian. 151 00:08:27,966 --> 00:08:29,299 Stop your crying. 152 00:08:29,300 --> 00:08:30,843 Stop it. 153 00:08:30,844 --> 00:08:31,969 Please stop. 154 00:08:31,970 --> 00:08:34,054 Stop. Stop it. 155 00:08:34,055 --> 00:08:37,233 Stop crying. Stop crying. 156 00:08:37,234 --> 00:08:39,601 Stop crying. Stop. 157 00:08:39,602 --> 00:08:43,022 Stewie, is there anything you'd like to say? 158 00:08:43,023 --> 00:08:46,191 Yeah. We're gonna save a lot of money on toilet paper. 159 00:08:46,192 --> 00:08:47,985 Ever see her wipe? 160 00:08:47,986 --> 00:08:49,820 She'd wrap up both hands like oven mitts 161 00:08:49,821 --> 00:08:52,823 and act like she was cleaning out a pot of burnt chili. 162 00:08:52,824 --> 00:08:56,535 Anyway, that's all I care to say about Meg. 163 00:08:56,536 --> 00:08:58,746 Maybe we should just have a moment of silence 164 00:08:58,747 --> 00:09:00,706 as we hear the guy down the street 165 00:09:00,707 --> 00:09:01,999 scream at his barking dog. 166 00:09:03,793 --> 00:09:05,878 Damn it, Rufus, shut up! 167 00:09:05,879 --> 00:09:07,504 Will you shut up?! 168 00:09:07,505 --> 00:09:10,425 Get in the house! Get in the house! 169 00:09:13,511 --> 00:09:17,598 ? This time things are gonna work out fine ? 170 00:09:17,599 --> 00:09:20,893 ? This time will be better than previous times ? 171 00:09:20,894 --> 00:09:23,687 ? This time is markedly different ? 172 00:09:23,688 --> 00:09:28,025 ? Than the times we had before ? 173 00:09:28,026 --> 00:09:32,029 ? This time is gonna be so much more! ? 174 00:09:34,074 --> 00:09:36,201 ? Or maybe it's not. ? 175 00:09:40,246 --> 00:09:42,748 Hi, new neighbor. 176 00:09:42,749 --> 00:09:44,041 I just thought I'd come by and see 177 00:09:44,042 --> 00:09:45,918 if I could borrow a cup of tampons. 178 00:09:45,919 --> 00:09:48,711 Sure. Just bring 'em back when you're done. No rush. 179 00:09:48,712 --> 00:09:51,715 - Thanks. My name's not important. - What's yours? 180 00:09:51,716 --> 00:09:54,093 Um... my name? 181 00:09:54,094 --> 00:09:55,512 My name is... 182 00:09:57,764 --> 00:09:59,389 Hallway. 183 00:09:59,390 --> 00:10:01,183 Natalie Hallway. 184 00:10:01,184 --> 00:10:02,808 Nice to meet you, Natalie. 185 00:10:02,809 --> 00:10:05,229 You want to join us on the roof and sit under string lights? 186 00:10:05,230 --> 00:10:06,730 That sounds great! 187 00:10:06,731 --> 00:10:08,565 I'll bring my hemorrhoid donut to sit on. 188 00:10:09,899 --> 00:10:11,568 Great joke, Natalie Hallway! 189 00:10:11,569 --> 00:10:13,570 Yes. It is a joke. 190 00:10:13,571 --> 00:10:15,739 Because Natalie Hallway doesn't need 191 00:10:15,740 --> 00:10:17,783 to sit on a hemorrhoid donut. 192 00:10:21,788 --> 00:10:24,836 To Natalie Hallway, our new friend. 193 00:10:26,084 --> 00:10:28,861 Natalie, sit down. Tell us about yourself. 194 00:10:31,089 --> 00:10:32,798 Yow...! 195 00:10:32,799 --> 00:10:34,217 What a view! 196 00:10:38,638 --> 00:10:40,764 You know, Stewie, when Meg was little, 197 00:10:40,765 --> 00:10:44,060 we used to love to make Christmas cookies together. 198 00:10:46,146 --> 00:10:48,814 Are... are those dongs? 199 00:10:48,815 --> 00:10:51,150 My God, from October to January 200 00:10:51,151 --> 00:10:52,776 I don't come up for air. 201 00:10:52,777 --> 00:10:55,612 All those families enjoying their Christmas dongs. 202 00:10:55,613 --> 00:10:57,823 Could we get some of your cookies for our wedding? 203 00:10:57,824 --> 00:10:59,449 Get out of here! This is a family bakery! 204 00:10:59,450 --> 00:11:01,034 I'm a Christian! 205 00:11:01,035 --> 00:11:03,036 In the case of Kent and Bradley 206 00:11:03,037 --> 00:11:05,247 v. Holiday Dongs, 207 00:11:05,248 --> 00:11:08,876 the court rules that you must give us the recipe. 208 00:11:08,877 --> 00:11:10,919 Oh! 209 00:11:10,920 --> 00:11:12,546 Under court order, Stewie went on 210 00:11:12,547 --> 00:11:14,673 to make baked goods for the gay wedding. 211 00:11:14,674 --> 00:11:16,967 And because of that, he did not get into heaven, 212 00:11:16,968 --> 00:11:19,344 just like they've always been saying. 213 00:11:26,102 --> 00:11:27,853 Chris, be in my selfie! 214 00:11:27,854 --> 00:11:30,022 I want to make Meg's death about me. 215 00:11:31,232 --> 00:11:32,983 Hey, Chris, I couldn't help but notice 216 00:11:32,984 --> 00:11:34,401 how much attention you're getting. 217 00:11:34,402 --> 00:11:35,652 Want to high-five hug? 218 00:11:35,653 --> 00:11:38,155 Hell yes. 219 00:11:38,156 --> 00:11:39,823 Hang in there, brotha. 220 00:11:39,824 --> 00:11:42,159 I will, brother. 221 00:11:42,160 --> 00:11:44,912 Chris, here are the keys to the drivers ed car 222 00:11:44,913 --> 00:11:46,747 to use anytime you want. 223 00:11:46,748 --> 00:11:49,708 - Wow, cool. - See, everyone? 224 00:11:49,709 --> 00:11:52,836 If I were using the drivers ed car for my real car, 225 00:11:52,837 --> 00:11:55,202 I wouldn't have given him the keys. 226 00:11:55,203 --> 00:11:56,743 That would be a psycho move. 227 00:11:56,744 --> 00:11:58,926 I wouldn't have a ride home. 228 00:11:58,927 --> 00:12:01,471 Chris, if you're heading home, can I get a ride? 229 00:12:18,029 --> 00:12:19,321 - Yeah! - Go, Natalie! 230 00:12:19,322 --> 00:12:20,697 Wow, Natalie Hallway, 231 00:12:20,698 --> 00:12:22,741 how did you get so good at bowling? 232 00:12:22,742 --> 00:12:24,117 Oh, I used to play a lot 233 00:12:24,118 --> 00:12:26,954 back in Qua... rea. 234 00:12:26,955 --> 00:12:28,733 Wow, you lived in Korea? 235 00:12:28,734 --> 00:12:30,040 Yep. 236 00:12:30,041 --> 00:12:31,875 When I was with the embassy. 237 00:12:31,876 --> 00:12:33,877 So was that before or after you were 238 00:12:33,878 --> 00:12:36,607 one of the first black women to do math for NASA? 239 00:12:36,608 --> 00:12:37,714 Yes. 240 00:12:37,715 --> 00:12:41,510 Wow, your parents must be so proud of you. 241 00:12:55,984 --> 00:12:57,484 Hey, Griffin, I heard you scored 242 00:12:57,485 --> 00:12:59,403 with the girls' basketball team yesterday. 243 00:12:59,404 --> 00:13:02,072 Yep, 12 points and eight rebounds. 244 00:13:02,073 --> 00:13:03,740 Aw, Griffin, you're the man. 245 00:13:03,741 --> 00:13:05,492 I got an extra orange at lunch. 246 00:13:05,493 --> 00:13:07,412 - You want it? - Yeah! 247 00:13:08,913 --> 00:13:11,081 Life is pretty sweet. 248 00:13:12,417 --> 00:13:13,667 Hello? 249 00:13:13,668 --> 00:13:14,668 Hey, Chris. 250 00:13:14,669 --> 00:13:15,919 Meg?! 251 00:13:15,920 --> 00:13:17,713 Are you alive? 252 00:13:17,714 --> 00:13:20,590 Yes. I'll explain everything. Can you come meet me? 253 00:13:20,591 --> 00:13:22,926 Okay, still the cemetery? 254 00:13:22,927 --> 00:13:24,177 Alive?! 255 00:13:24,178 --> 00:13:25,929 Chris, you already know that part. 256 00:13:25,930 --> 00:13:27,180 Oh, right. 257 00:13:27,181 --> 00:13:29,933 So you suddenly got sick of your new, great life? 258 00:13:29,934 --> 00:13:31,184 No, Chris. 259 00:13:31,185 --> 00:13:33,603 I can't believe I'm saying this, but... 260 00:13:33,604 --> 00:13:35,474 I missed Mom. 261 00:13:35,475 --> 00:13:37,079 I missed you. 262 00:13:37,080 --> 00:13:38,775 I missed the whole family. 263 00:13:38,776 --> 00:13:40,777 I'm glad you're alive, but you should know 264 00:13:40,778 --> 00:13:42,279 things are different now. 265 00:13:42,280 --> 00:13:44,384 - Dad finally got a Peloton? - Yeah. 266 00:13:44,385 --> 00:13:45,949 - Is he using it? - No. 267 00:13:45,950 --> 00:13:47,284 He mumbled something about the Wi-Fi, 268 00:13:47,285 --> 00:13:49,119 then ate a whole chicken on the couch, 269 00:13:49,120 --> 00:13:51,371 - but there's something else. - What is it? 270 00:13:51,372 --> 00:13:53,874 Let's talk about it in the van. 271 00:13:53,875 --> 00:13:54,875 Chris?! 272 00:13:54,876 --> 00:13:56,960 What are you doing?! Let me out! 273 00:13:56,961 --> 00:13:59,796 Sorry, Meg, but I can't let you come home just yet. 274 00:13:59,797 --> 00:14:01,382 I'm too popular now. 275 00:14:03,968 --> 00:14:05,677 - What's the holdup? - What? 276 00:14:05,678 --> 00:14:07,302 I slapped the van twice. 277 00:14:07,303 --> 00:14:10,015 Yeah, what was that? I thought something flew into the van. 278 00:14:10,016 --> 00:14:11,892 No, that's, like, the universal signal 279 00:14:11,893 --> 00:14:13,310 for "move it out." 280 00:14:13,311 --> 00:14:14,853 I never heard that. 281 00:14:14,854 --> 00:14:16,313 And I drive vans all the time. 282 00:14:16,314 --> 00:14:18,398 Well, then how do you know when it's time to head out? 283 00:14:18,399 --> 00:14:21,151 Somebody yells out "okay" or "all right." 284 00:14:21,152 --> 00:14:22,986 Every so often it's "yep." 285 00:14:22,987 --> 00:14:25,655 Well, okay, you're good to go. 286 00:14:25,656 --> 00:14:28,158 All right. 287 00:14:28,159 --> 00:14:29,326 Ow! Ow! 288 00:14:29,327 --> 00:14:30,994 What are you doing?! 289 00:14:30,995 --> 00:14:32,913 Sorry, I got distracted by all this 290 00:14:32,914 --> 00:14:34,957 whappin' the side of the van business. 291 00:14:44,759 --> 00:14:48,063 Hello? Hello? 292 00:14:48,064 --> 00:14:50,013 Where is everyone? 293 00:14:50,014 --> 00:14:53,298 Damn it, Chris, I don't care that you're popular now. 294 00:14:53,299 --> 00:14:55,060 Let me out of here! 295 00:14:55,061 --> 00:14:57,509 Well, at least I still have my music. 296 00:14:57,510 --> 00:15:00,190 Siri, play Seals and Croft. 297 00:15:00,191 --> 00:15:04,486 ? Darling if you want me to be... ? 298 00:15:06,239 --> 00:15:10,243 ? Get closer to me. ? 299 00:15:12,703 --> 00:15:15,080 Good morning, students. 300 00:15:15,081 --> 00:15:17,290 We are gathered here for two reasons today. 301 00:15:17,291 --> 00:15:19,918 One, to mourn the loss of Meg Griffin. 302 00:15:19,919 --> 00:15:22,587 And two, to find the owner of this X-Men water bottle 303 00:15:22,588 --> 00:15:24,780 someone left in wood shop... Does anyone recognize it? 304 00:15:24,781 --> 00:15:28,218 - I'll take it! - That's not what I asked. Anyone? 305 00:15:28,219 --> 00:15:29,970 I'm not gonna tell you which character's on it, 306 00:15:29,971 --> 00:15:31,721 you have to be able to tell me the character. 307 00:15:31,722 --> 00:15:33,056 Wolverine! 308 00:15:33,057 --> 00:15:34,599 - Are you guessing? - Am I right? 309 00:15:34,600 --> 00:15:36,226 All right, we'll handle this after. 310 00:15:36,227 --> 00:15:39,646 But now, here to help you mourn, an artist who specializes 311 00:15:39,647 --> 00:15:41,982 in sensitive music to do finger stuff to, 312 00:15:41,983 --> 00:15:44,609 Mr. John Mayer! 313 00:15:44,610 --> 00:15:46,945 It's good to be here. I love high school! 314 00:15:46,946 --> 00:15:49,739 Who are you? I was born in 2003! 315 00:15:49,740 --> 00:15:51,825 Then I'm probably your father. 316 00:15:51,826 --> 00:15:53,994 Ooh, pwned! 317 00:15:53,995 --> 00:15:57,289 Whoa, looks like the school really is missing Meg. 318 00:15:57,290 --> 00:15:59,582 Chris, Brian, would you help Peter? 319 00:15:59,583 --> 00:16:02,962 He's one of those "has to be supported by both elbows" mourners. 320 00:16:05,131 --> 00:16:08,536 I'm gonna need three seats for my elbow supporters. 321 00:16:10,470 --> 00:16:12,345 Stewie, you look depressed. 322 00:16:12,346 --> 00:16:13,972 You still upset about Meg? 323 00:16:13,973 --> 00:16:15,980 No, it's just this gym is sad. 324 00:16:15,981 --> 00:16:18,477 If you haven't won a championship since 1982, 325 00:16:18,478 --> 00:16:20,729 just take the banner down. 326 00:16:25,735 --> 00:16:27,652 Well, Meg, 327 00:16:27,653 --> 00:16:30,822 looks like you really are dead this time. 328 00:16:30,823 --> 00:16:33,617 They say your life flashes before your eyes when you die. 329 00:16:33,618 --> 00:16:36,161 I wonder what I'll see. 330 00:16:38,039 --> 00:16:39,247 Oh, yeah! 331 00:16:39,248 --> 00:16:40,373 Over! 332 00:16:40,374 --> 00:16:41,708 I'm a tomato. 333 00:16:43,461 --> 00:16:44,586 I'm not in any of these! 334 00:16:44,587 --> 00:16:45,795 Ladies and gentlemen, 335 00:16:45,796 --> 00:16:47,464 Mr. Conway Twitty. 336 00:16:47,465 --> 00:16:48,548 Oh, come on! 337 00:16:48,549 --> 00:16:50,133 I was in the Kingsman fight! 338 00:16:50,134 --> 00:16:51,426 That could've been in there. 339 00:16:51,427 --> 00:16:52,636 I can do stuff. 340 00:16:52,637 --> 00:16:54,937 I-I can be a part of a comedy team! 341 00:16:54,938 --> 00:16:57,181 Look, hey, Chris, who's on first? 342 00:16:57,182 --> 00:17:00,502 A baseball player. 343 00:17:00,503 --> 00:17:02,062 Well, that's it. 344 00:17:02,063 --> 00:17:03,897 I'm gonna show them. 345 00:17:03,898 --> 00:17:05,565 I'm gonna live. 346 00:17:05,566 --> 00:17:07,776 I'm getting out of here. 347 00:17:07,777 --> 00:17:10,070 Now let's see, if I whap my forehead 348 00:17:10,071 --> 00:17:12,072 against this cement floor enough times, 349 00:17:12,073 --> 00:17:14,658 I think I can create a blood luge 350 00:17:14,659 --> 00:17:16,535 to slide myself out on. 351 00:17:16,536 --> 00:17:18,995 This... this 352 00:17:18,996 --> 00:17:21,289 can be in the highlight 353 00:17:21,290 --> 00:17:23,209 video! 354 00:17:36,973 --> 00:17:39,891 Wow, thank you, John Mayer. Wasn't he terrific? 355 00:17:39,892 --> 00:17:41,893 I think we can all agree that John is entitled 356 00:17:41,894 --> 00:17:44,813 to take whichever student he wishes home with him tonight. 357 00:17:46,482 --> 00:17:48,066 And finally, the Quiznos 358 00:17:48,067 --> 00:17:49,776 across the street has graciously 359 00:17:49,777 --> 00:17:51,945 taken out a full page ad in the yearbook 360 00:17:51,946 --> 00:17:54,448 that will feature a dedication page to Meg. 361 00:17:56,492 --> 00:17:58,577 Quiznos, go ahead and stand up. 362 00:17:58,578 --> 00:18:01,087 Come on, in the back, you guys have been great. 363 00:18:10,673 --> 00:18:12,090 Oh, my God, oh, my God, everyone! 364 00:18:12,091 --> 00:18:14,050 He's proposing right here! 365 00:18:14,051 --> 00:18:16,761 Right in front of everyone! Oh, she's so lucky! 366 00:18:16,762 --> 00:18:18,179 Oh, my God! 367 00:18:19,932 --> 00:18:23,059 I'm alive! I'm alive! 368 00:18:24,228 --> 00:18:25,478 Meg! 369 00:18:25,479 --> 00:18:26,980 Those are dark-soled shoes. 370 00:18:26,981 --> 00:18:29,816 She's wearing dark-soled shoes on the gym floor! 371 00:18:29,817 --> 00:18:32,068 Sneakers only in the gym, guys. 372 00:18:32,069 --> 00:18:33,690 Oh, my God, Meg! 373 00:18:33,691 --> 00:18:35,500 I'm so glad you're alive! 374 00:18:35,501 --> 00:18:36,989 What happened? 375 00:18:36,990 --> 00:18:39,076 He did this! 376 00:18:40,494 --> 00:18:42,621 Are you saying Chris saved your life? 377 00:18:42,622 --> 00:18:44,914 This calls for a celebration. 378 00:18:44,915 --> 00:18:46,916 All right, everyone throw confetti 379 00:18:46,917 --> 00:18:48,627 and ruin the janitor's weekend. 380 00:18:52,923 --> 00:18:55,091 Hey, I'm not gonna make it this weekend. 381 00:18:55,092 --> 00:18:58,094 Oh, but you're gonna miss the big janitor dance! 382 00:18:58,095 --> 00:19:00,930 This is our last chance to get laid before Janitor College! 383 00:19:00,931 --> 00:19:03,141 You think I don't know that?! 384 00:19:03,142 --> 00:19:06,561 No! Chris kidnapped me so he could stay popular! 385 00:19:06,562 --> 00:19:09,718 What? Chris would never do that. 386 00:19:09,719 --> 00:19:10,857 Chris? 387 00:19:10,858 --> 00:19:12,652 It's true, Mom. 388 00:19:16,030 --> 00:19:18,156 I owe my sister an apology. 389 00:19:18,157 --> 00:19:20,530 I shouldn't have treated her the way I did. 390 00:19:20,531 --> 00:19:22,452 And I think if Meg were here today, 391 00:19:22,453 --> 00:19:24,454 she'd be the first one to agree. 392 00:19:24,455 --> 00:19:25,789 I am here! 393 00:19:25,790 --> 00:19:27,123 I'm right here! 394 00:19:27,124 --> 00:19:29,111 Anyway, Meg, wherever you are, 395 00:19:29,112 --> 00:19:30,331 I'm sorry. 396 00:19:32,296 --> 00:19:35,048 Damn it, I'm giving a speech! I want to tell you... 397 00:19:35,049 --> 00:19:38,275 Very loud chant! Very loud chant! 398 00:19:38,276 --> 00:19:40,512 Very loud chant! Very loud chant! 399 00:19:42,473 --> 00:19:44,974 Oh, my God, Meg, I'm so glad you're back. 400 00:19:44,975 --> 00:19:46,940 We love you, honey. 401 00:19:46,941 --> 00:19:48,520 I love you, too, Mom. 402 00:19:48,521 --> 00:19:50,897 Yeah, Meg, I'm just really glad this whole ordeal is over. 403 00:19:50,898 --> 00:19:52,691 Glad this whole ordeal is what? 404 00:19:52,692 --> 00:19:54,192 Over. 405 00:19:54,193 --> 00:19:56,400 Come on! 406 00:20:02,410 --> 00:20:04,446 I'm sorry I faked my own death, Mom. 407 00:20:04,447 --> 00:20:06,913 It's okay, Meg. Actually, I should've known. 408 00:20:06,914 --> 00:20:09,082 Faking stuff is part of being a woman. 409 00:20:09,083 --> 00:20:10,861 - Really? - Oh, yeah. 410 00:20:10,862 --> 00:20:12,375 Women fake a lot of things. 411 00:20:12,376 --> 00:20:14,879 You faked your death, I fake orgasms and being 412 00:20:14,880 --> 00:20:17,674 impressed by my husband's accomplishments at work. 413 00:20:17,675 --> 00:20:19,718 Hey, Lois, guess who got to erase 414 00:20:19,719 --> 00:20:21,678 the white board in a meeting today? 415 00:20:21,679 --> 00:20:23,012 Oh, my! 416 00:20:23,013 --> 00:20:25,098 I think someone's earned himself 417 00:20:25,099 --> 00:20:28,309 Mama Lois' famous egg salad, huh? 418 00:20:28,310 --> 00:20:29,352 Oh, yum! 419 00:20:29,353 --> 00:20:31,688 Oh, today just keeps getting better and better! 420 00:20:31,689 --> 00:20:34,149 Dad, I thought you hated Mom's egg salad. 421 00:20:34,150 --> 00:20:36,860 Chris, part of being a man is faking things. 422 00:20:36,861 --> 00:20:40,196 Like orgasms or pretending to like your wife's egg salad. 423 00:20:40,197 --> 00:20:43,325 And anyway, I give it to that raccoon outside who likes me. 424 00:20:45,160 --> 00:20:46,876 I thought you hated that guy. 425 00:20:46,877 --> 00:20:49,706 Part of being a raccoon is faking things. 426 00:20:49,707 --> 00:20:52,125 Like orgasms or pretending to like people 427 00:20:52,126 --> 00:20:54,169 who give you egg salad. 428 00:20:54,170 --> 00:20:55,587 Oh, Peter! 429 00:20:55,588 --> 00:20:57,130 Oh, Lois! 430 00:20:57,131 --> 00:20:59,675 Oh, other raccoon!