1
00:00:02,742 --> 00:00:04,775
It feels like it
wasn't that long ago

2
00:00:04,777 --> 00:00:07,044
we were here doing
this for Halley.

3
00:00:07,046 --> 00:00:09,580
'Cause it wasn't.

4
00:00:09,582 --> 00:00:11,482
Which reminds me,
before we leave,

5
00:00:11,484 --> 00:00:13,617
let's get you a vasectomy.

6
00:00:13,619 --> 00:00:18,389
Oh, that's sweet, but
today is all about you.

7
00:00:20,092 --> 00:00:23,027
So, you two ready to find
out the sex of this baby?

8
00:00:23,029 --> 00:00:24,295
Yeah.
Absolutely.

9
00:00:24,297 --> 00:00:25,763
Is Halley hoping

10
00:00:25,765 --> 00:00:27,565
for a little brother
or a little sister?

11
00:00:27,567 --> 00:00:28,899
Well, she's nine months old,

12
00:00:28,901 --> 00:00:32,970
so unless it jingles or is
in my bra, she doesn't care.

13
00:00:32,972 --> 00:00:36,340
And how about you two?

14
00:00:36,342 --> 00:00:39,577
You know, for the first one,
we really wanted a girl,

15
00:00:39,579 --> 00:00:42,279
but this time around, we
don't have a preference.

16
00:00:42,281 --> 00:00:45,349
Yeah. Boy, girl,
as long as it's healthy.

17
00:00:45,351 --> 00:00:47,485
Well, it's a boy.

18
00:00:49,255 --> 00:00:52,022
Oh.
Oh.

19
00:00:52,024 --> 00:00:55,593
Come on, you can't
really be disappointed.

20
00:00:55,595 --> 00:00:57,595
Hey, I barely know
how to be a man myself.

21
00:00:57,597 --> 00:00:59,597
Now I have
to teach someone?

22
00:00:59,599 --> 00:01:03,634
As the saying goes,
"Those who can't do, teach""

23
00:01:04,670 --> 00:01:06,704
Don't you want a little
version of Howard?

24
00:01:06,706 --> 00:01:10,040
I already have a little
version of Howard.

25
00:01:10,977 --> 00:01:12,610
Now I'm having a son?

26
00:01:12,612 --> 00:01:15,412
I'll have to teach him
how to play sports,

27
00:01:15,414 --> 00:01:17,882
and-and watch sports

28
00:01:17,884 --> 00:01:20,851
and-and-and-and-and-and...

29
00:01:20,853 --> 00:01:24,021
He just ran out of man things.
He's in trouble.

30
00:01:26,125 --> 00:01:27,992
It's okay. We're
all here to help.

31
00:01:27,994 --> 00:01:31,562
Yes. And this baby will have
plenty of manly role models.

32
00:01:31,564 --> 00:01:33,898
Now, I'm certain that whatever
Bernadette can't teach him,

33
00:01:33,900 --> 00:01:35,165
Penny can.

34
00:01:36,502 --> 00:01:38,602
Uh, she can pee into a bottle.

35
00:01:38,604 --> 00:01:39,670
Mm-hmm.

36
00:01:39,672 --> 00:01:41,906
Anything with a neck
wider than a nickel.

37
00:01:43,843 --> 00:01:47,278
Howie, there's a lot of amazing
things you can teach a son.

38
00:01:47,280 --> 00:01:50,548
Yeah. You do always know how
to pick just the right antacid.

39
00:01:50,550 --> 00:01:53,551
I don't know if
I can teach that.

40
00:01:53,553 --> 00:01:56,020
It's just something
I was born with.

41
00:01:56,022 --> 00:01:58,055
Come on. You can build things.

42
00:01:58,057 --> 00:01:59,590
You were an astronaut.

43
00:01:59,592 --> 00:02:01,058
That's true.

44
00:02:01,060 --> 00:02:03,394
You know, as a kid,
I used to make model rockets.

45
00:02:03,396 --> 00:02:05,229
That'd be pretty cool
to do with a son.

46
00:02:05,231 --> 00:02:07,865
Model rockets. Finally,
something interesting.

47
00:02:07,867 --> 00:02:11,135
What is your preferred
mode of recovery?

48
00:02:11,137 --> 00:02:13,370
Sheldon, we're helping
our friends.

49
00:02:13,372 --> 00:02:16,607
And we got to model
rockets, yeah?

50
00:02:16,609 --> 00:02:19,810
It was a tedious road,
but well worth the effort.

51
00:02:19,812 --> 00:02:22,479
- So, have you thought of any names?
- Amy.

52
00:02:22,481 --> 00:02:23,647
We finally got
to model rockets.

53
00:02:23,649 --> 00:02:25,082
Why are you
turning back?

54
00:02:26,419 --> 00:02:29,820
? Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ?

55
00:02:29,822 --> 00:02:33,424
? Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ?

56
00:02:33,426 --> 00:02:34,959
? The Earth began to cool ?

57
00:02:34,961 --> 00:02:37,895
? The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ?

58
00:02:37,897 --> 00:02:40,197
? We built the Wall ?
? We built the pyramids ?

59
00:02:40,199 --> 00:02:42,800
? Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ?

60
00:02:42,802 --> 00:02:44,735
? That all started
with a big bang ?

61
00:02:44,737 --> 00:02:45,770
? Bang! ?

62
00:02:45,771 --> 00:02:49,771
? The Big Bang Theory 11x04 ?
The Explosion Implosion

63
00:02:49,772 --> 00:02:55,572
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man

64
00:02:55,669 --> 00:02:57,002
Hey, where are you going?

65
00:02:57,004 --> 00:02:58,770
Back to the dry cleaner.
Look at this.

66
00:02:58,772 --> 00:03:01,240
They didn't get the stain
out of my Starfleet uniform.

67
00:03:01,242 --> 00:03:04,276
Well, if you didn't make me wear
the green body paint in bed,

68
00:03:04,278 --> 00:03:07,279
you wouldn't have to get it
dry-cleaned so much.

69
00:03:07,281 --> 00:03:09,181
Nah, it's worth it.

70
00:03:11,785 --> 00:03:13,151
Hey, wait, it's your mom.

71
00:03:13,153 --> 00:03:16,088
Oh, too bad.
She just missed me!

72
00:03:19,527 --> 00:03:20,859
Hey, Beverly.

73
00:03:20,861 --> 00:03:22,361
Oh, hello, Penny.

74
00:03:22,363 --> 00:03:23,562
Uh, Leonard just left.

75
00:03:23,564 --> 00:03:25,864
He's gonna be so upset
he missed your call.

76
00:03:25,866 --> 00:03:27,599
Why?

77
00:03:27,601 --> 00:03:29,468
Because he...

78
00:03:29,470 --> 00:03:30,802
Yeah, I don't know.

79
00:03:30,804 --> 00:03:32,838
How are you?

80
00:03:32,840 --> 00:03:35,274
Did you mean personally
or professionally?

81
00:03:35,276 --> 00:03:36,775
Um, personally?

82
00:03:36,777 --> 00:03:38,844
Like, what'd you do last night?

83
00:03:38,846 --> 00:03:41,113
I had Cuban food
at the home of a man

84
00:03:41,115 --> 00:03:45,117
with whom I shared
unsatisfying intercourse.

85
00:03:46,954 --> 00:03:49,521
Wow. Okay.

86
00:03:51,258 --> 00:03:53,659
And to anticipate
your next questions,

87
00:03:53,661 --> 00:03:56,929
roasted pork
and sideways missionary.

88
00:03:59,466 --> 00:04:02,935
Sure. Sure.
'Cause you were full.

89
00:04:05,039 --> 00:04:07,806
I haven't looked
at all this stuff in years.

90
00:04:07,808 --> 00:04:09,141
Had it.

91
00:04:09,143 --> 00:04:10,676
Had it.

92
00:04:10,678 --> 00:04:13,579
Burnt down my garage with it.

93
00:04:13,581 --> 00:04:15,647
I had three model rockets
as a kid,

94
00:04:15,649 --> 00:04:18,650
and that was the largest
space program in India.

95
00:04:18,652 --> 00:04:22,254
You have a replica Saturn V?

96
00:04:22,256 --> 00:04:25,257
Yeah. My dad bought it
before he, you know,

97
00:04:25,259 --> 00:04:27,192
abandoned our family.

98
00:04:27,194 --> 00:04:29,294
Lucky duck.

99
00:04:29,296 --> 00:04:34,099
Could never bring myself to
open it without him.

100
00:04:34,101 --> 00:04:35,701
It's silly.

101
00:04:35,703 --> 00:04:36,835
No, it's not silly.

102
00:04:36,837 --> 00:04:38,904
I always wanted my dad
to build rockets with me,

103
00:04:38,906 --> 00:04:41,239
but he wasn't interested.

104
00:04:41,241 --> 00:04:42,708
Ah, yes, disappointing
fathers.

105
00:04:42,710 --> 00:04:44,109
Tell me about it.

106
00:04:44,111 --> 00:04:47,179
I remember for my 16th birthday,
my dad bought me a Mercedes.

107
00:04:47,181 --> 00:04:50,382
Like, a little one,
like a starter Mercedes.

108
00:04:51,819 --> 00:04:52,985
He had barely handed me the keys

109
00:04:52,987 --> 00:04:54,720
before he had
to rush back to work.

110
00:04:54,722 --> 00:04:57,990
I didn't see him again till,
like, pretty late that night.

111
00:05:00,794 --> 00:05:02,661
Anyway...

112
00:05:04,064 --> 00:05:07,766
...as angry as I was
with him leaving,

113
00:05:07,768 --> 00:05:09,935
building this stuff
is probably what led me

114
00:05:09,937 --> 00:05:11,470
to become an engineer.

115
00:05:11,472 --> 00:05:13,705
I suppose, in his own way,

116
00:05:13,707 --> 00:05:15,707
my dad also encouraged me
to pursue science.

117
00:05:15,709 --> 00:05:17,542
I mean, he is the one
that taught me

118
00:05:17,544 --> 00:05:19,811
that flatulence
is combustible.

119
00:05:20,881 --> 00:05:24,816
And also, polyester
gym shorts don't burn.

120
00:05:24,818 --> 00:05:26,318
They melt.

121
00:05:28,022 --> 00:05:30,055
Yeah, I guess I'm an
astrophysicist because,

122
00:05:30,057 --> 00:05:32,524
as a kid, I said I like
to look at the stars,

123
00:05:32,526 --> 00:05:35,727
so my dad sent me to Hawaii
to visit the Keck telescope.

124
00:05:38,532 --> 00:05:40,699
Screw you. My pain is real.

125
00:05:44,405 --> 00:05:47,005
You know what?
Forget the past.

126
00:05:47,007 --> 00:05:50,275
What do you say you and
me build this rocket?

127
00:05:50,277 --> 00:05:52,010
That sounds like
it could be

128
00:05:52,012 --> 00:05:53,845
a real bonding
experience for us.

129
00:05:53,847 --> 00:05:54,880
Right?

130
00:05:54,882 --> 00:05:55,847
Oh, I see.

131
00:05:55,849 --> 00:05:58,050
Oh, you think
that's a positive.

132
00:06:02,189 --> 00:06:04,956
So, you don't want to hang out
with Sheldon and Howard?

133
00:06:04,958 --> 00:06:07,492
No, they were bonding
over their sad childhoods,

134
00:06:07,494 --> 00:06:11,363
and my stupid parents
were always there for me.

135
00:06:12,599 --> 00:06:13,932
What's all this?

136
00:06:13,934 --> 00:06:16,134
I'm just boxing up all
the clothes Halley's outgrown.

137
00:06:16,136 --> 00:06:18,103
Guess we won't
need them anymore.

138
00:06:18,105 --> 00:06:19,438
Oh, well, slow down.

139
00:06:19,440 --> 00:06:21,440
I'm sure there's some
you could reuse for a boy.

140
00:06:21,442 --> 00:06:24,609
"Daddy's little girl"?

141
00:06:24,611 --> 00:06:27,279
Okay, well, what if we, uh,
change it to say,

142
00:06:27,281 --> 00:06:29,748
"Daddy's little girl magnet"?

143
00:06:29,750 --> 00:06:31,550
Boom! Boy shirt.

144
00:06:33,420 --> 00:06:34,586
What about this?

145
00:06:34,588 --> 00:06:35,954
Uh, okay.

146
00:06:35,956 --> 00:06:38,457
Uh, pull off the skirt, slap
a lightning bolt on the front,

147
00:06:38,459 --> 00:06:40,192
and you got baby Flash.

148
00:06:40,194 --> 00:06:41,393
Ooh.

149
00:06:41,395 --> 00:06:42,594
Stick a long sleeve under it.

150
00:06:42,596 --> 00:06:44,963
Boom! Baby Sheldon.

151
00:06:46,500 --> 00:06:48,166
Wow, you're really good at this.

152
00:06:48,168 --> 00:06:49,301
Oh, please.

153
00:06:49,303 --> 00:06:50,535
This isn't my first time

154
00:06:50,537 --> 00:06:53,205
turning girl clothes
into boy clothes.

155
00:06:54,181 --> 00:06:57,115
Why? You got your sister's
hand-me-downs?

156
00:06:57,117 --> 00:07:00,452
Yeah, that.

157
00:07:03,757 --> 00:07:06,725
Oh. I should've
brought peanuts.

158
00:07:06,727 --> 00:07:08,760
You can't eat peanuts.
You're allergic.

159
00:07:08,762 --> 00:07:11,963
If you die, who's going
to drive me home?

160
00:07:11,965 --> 00:07:13,531
I'm not gonna eat them.

161
00:07:13,533 --> 00:07:15,066
It's a thing
they do at JPL.

162
00:07:15,068 --> 00:07:17,135
When the Ranger mission finally
had a successful launch,

163
00:07:17,137 --> 00:07:18,436
there were peanuts
in the room.

164
00:07:18,438 --> 00:07:21,206
Ever since then,
they have them at every launch.

165
00:07:21,208 --> 00:07:23,808
That sounds like
a silly superstition.

166
00:07:23,810 --> 00:07:26,277
It's more of a tradition.

167
00:07:26,279 --> 00:07:28,713
Oh! I do love a tradition.

168
00:07:28,715 --> 00:07:32,383
Could you pull over
at the next peanut store?

169
00:07:32,385 --> 00:07:35,353
I don't think
that's a real thing.

170
00:07:35,355 --> 00:07:36,721
Oh, don't be pedantic.

171
00:07:36,723 --> 00:07:38,356
Any nut store will do.

172
00:07:38,358 --> 00:07:42,794
I-I don't think we can
get peanuts out here.

173
00:07:42,796 --> 00:07:46,131
Ah, well, then
this whole day's ruined.

174
00:07:46,133 --> 00:07:50,135
Now that I think about it, maybe
it is more of a superstition.

175
00:07:50,137 --> 00:07:51,870
Whew! That was close.

176
00:08:00,447 --> 00:08:03,414
Oh, uh, hey, Beverly, you called
my phone, not Leonard's.

177
00:08:03,416 --> 00:08:06,484
Actually, I was hoping
to speak with you.

178
00:08:06,486 --> 00:08:08,119
Is this a good time?

179
00:08:08,121 --> 00:08:09,954
Uh, that depends.

180
00:08:09,956 --> 00:08:11,656
What time is it where you are?

181
00:08:11,658 --> 00:08:12,824
Uh, just after 5:00.

182
00:08:12,826 --> 00:08:15,126
Yeah, that counts.

183
00:08:15,128 --> 00:08:17,662
What's up?

184
00:08:17,664 --> 00:08:20,999
Well, I enjoyed our conversation
the other day,

185
00:08:21,001 --> 00:08:23,067
and I was hoping to continue it.

186
00:08:23,069 --> 00:08:24,269
Really?

187
00:08:24,271 --> 00:08:26,571
Uh, yes. You may
find this surprising,

188
00:08:26,573 --> 00:08:29,841
but I don't have a lot of
what you would call girlfriends.

189
00:08:29,843 --> 00:08:33,711
What?

190
00:08:33,713 --> 00:08:37,115
Of course, there are
my female colleagues,

191
00:08:37,117 --> 00:08:39,050
but, uh, they're all Freudians,

192
00:08:39,052 --> 00:08:42,554
so the only boy that I can
dish about is my father.

193
00:08:48,762 --> 00:08:50,024
Uh, well, you know,
I'm here for you.

194
00:08:50,025 --> 00:08:51,424
What do you want to talk about?

195
00:08:51,426 --> 00:08:54,627
Well, last time,
we focused on my life.

196
00:08:54,629 --> 00:08:56,496
If we're going to be
real girlfriends,

197
00:08:56,498 --> 00:08:58,197
we should talk about you
as well.

198
00:08:58,199 --> 00:08:59,632
Well, you know,
if we're gonna be

199
00:08:59,634 --> 00:09:01,668
real girlfriends,
we should get a third girl

200
00:09:01,670 --> 00:09:04,470
we can trash behind her back.

201
00:09:04,472 --> 00:09:07,307
Oh, so we'd be catty.

202
00:09:07,309 --> 00:09:10,043
Oh, I like it.

203
00:09:10,045 --> 00:09:12,111
What about Sheldon's fiancée?

204
00:09:12,113 --> 00:09:15,081
She seems a bit dour.

205
00:09:15,083 --> 00:09:17,784
Ooh, "dour."

206
00:09:17,786 --> 00:09:19,485
Meow.

207
00:09:23,625 --> 00:09:24,924
All right.

208
00:09:24,926 --> 00:09:26,292
Here we go.

209
00:09:26,294 --> 00:09:28,561
L-minus ten, nine...

210
00:09:28,563 --> 00:09:30,797
Wait, what are you doing?
It's "T-minus""

211
00:09:30,799 --> 00:09:33,366
I was an astronaut.
We used L-minus.

212
00:09:33,368 --> 00:09:35,368
But this is a Saturn V,

213
00:09:35,370 --> 00:09:36,903
and when they launched those,
they said "T-minus""

214
00:09:36,905 --> 00:09:40,173
It's my rocket!
We're doing it my way.

215
00:09:40,175 --> 00:09:42,675
Fine.

216
00:09:44,112 --> 00:09:46,012
I'm not saying
I know why your dad left,

217
00:09:46,014 --> 00:09:48,314
but I think I'm getting an idea.

218
00:09:50,185 --> 00:09:51,284
L-minus

219
00:09:51,286 --> 00:09:53,219
ten, nine, eight,

220
00:09:53,221 --> 00:09:54,487
seven, six...

221
00:09:54,489 --> 00:09:58,191
'Cause you're
kind of bossy.

222
00:09:58,193 --> 00:10:01,227
...five, four, three, two,

223
00:10:01,229 --> 00:10:02,695
one...

224
00:10:06,701 --> 00:10:09,836
I remember them
going up higher.

225
00:10:18,177 --> 00:10:19,243
Well, that's perfect.

226
00:10:19,245 --> 00:10:21,211
I mean, the one thing
I thought I could

227
00:10:21,213 --> 00:10:23,948
do with my son,
I can't even do that right.

228
00:10:23,950 --> 00:10:27,418
Well, if you want to see it
again, I got it on video.

229
00:10:27,420 --> 00:10:30,254
Looks pretty cool
in slow motion.

230
00:10:30,256 --> 00:10:31,956
Thank you for
your support.

231
00:10:31,958 --> 00:10:34,224
You're welcome.
I was being sarcastic.

232
00:10:34,226 --> 00:10:35,859
How dare you!

233
00:10:37,930 --> 00:10:40,197
Sheldon, what am I
gonna do?

234
00:10:40,199 --> 00:10:44,268
I mean, what do I know
about raising a boy?

235
00:10:44,270 --> 00:10:48,205
What do you know
about raising a girl?

236
00:10:49,542 --> 00:10:52,309
Oh, my God, you're right.

237
00:10:52,311 --> 00:10:55,512
Well, I don't know if
that was sarcasm or not.

238
00:10:55,514 --> 00:10:58,949
So, either you're welcome,
or hey!

239
00:11:07,493 --> 00:11:09,293
Leonard, did you really
just text me from the couch

240
00:11:09,295 --> 00:11:11,895
to put extra mustard
on your sandwich?

241
00:11:11,897 --> 00:11:15,032
I was worried you might not
check your e-mail.

242
00:11:18,537 --> 00:11:20,671
I swear to God,
I will throw this out.

243
00:11:20,673 --> 00:11:22,406
That one was not me.

244
00:11:22,408 --> 00:11:24,241
Oh, wait, it was just your mom.

245
00:11:24,243 --> 00:11:25,876
My mother's texting you?

246
00:11:25,878 --> 00:11:27,978
Yeah. We've been talking
a lot lately.

247
00:11:27,980 --> 00:11:30,047
Why?

248
00:11:30,049 --> 00:11:33,951
She sick of talking to
the magic mirror on the wall?

249
00:11:33,953 --> 00:11:36,320
No, I think she's lonely.

250
00:11:36,322 --> 00:11:37,955
She's been reaching out.

251
00:11:37,957 --> 00:11:41,392
Okay, just be careful.

252
00:11:41,394 --> 00:11:42,993
You think you're
getting close to her,

253
00:11:42,995 --> 00:11:45,429
and the next thing you know,
you're featured in a book

254
00:11:45,431 --> 00:11:50,067
called He's Doing It On Purpose:
Raising a Teenage Bed-Wetter.

255
00:11:50,069 --> 00:11:52,002
No, it's not like that.

256
00:11:52,004 --> 00:11:54,204
You know, she's been
opening up about her life,

257
00:11:54,206 --> 00:11:56,807
and she's actually been
really supportive about mine.

258
00:11:56,809 --> 00:11:58,208
Really?
Yeah.

259
00:11:58,210 --> 00:11:59,443
I've been telling her
about my job,

260
00:11:59,445 --> 00:12:01,512
and she said
she was proud of me.

261
00:12:01,514 --> 00:12:04,882
Well, that's great.

262
00:12:05,951 --> 00:12:08,952
Never told me
she was proud of me.

263
00:12:10,489 --> 00:12:14,124
Even when I stayed dry
for a whole month.

264
00:12:14,126 --> 00:12:17,261
Do you not want me
to be friends with your mom?

265
00:12:17,263 --> 00:12:18,896
Well, let's be clear.

266
00:12:18,898 --> 00:12:21,965
I-I married you to hurt her.

267
00:12:24,603 --> 00:12:26,904
You're kind of ruining it.

268
00:12:29,275 --> 00:12:32,676
Reason number 13
to feel good:

269
00:12:32,678 --> 00:12:34,912
as a launch, it was bad,

270
00:12:34,914 --> 00:12:37,815
but as an explosion,
it was glorious.

271
00:12:40,886 --> 00:12:43,620
you still have
all your fingers,

272
00:12:43,622 --> 00:12:46,723
and boys prefer
a dad with fingers.

273
00:12:46,725 --> 00:12:48,125
Thanks for trying,

274
00:12:48,127 --> 00:12:50,427
but you're not gonna be able
to cheer me up.

275
00:12:50,429 --> 00:12:52,496
Well, how about
this, then?

276
00:12:52,498 --> 00:12:54,231
You quit your whining
before I give you

277
00:12:54,233 --> 00:12:56,300
something to cry
about, young man.

278
00:12:56,302 --> 00:12:58,435
What?

279
00:12:58,437 --> 00:13:02,406
Those are comforting words
my father would often say.

280
00:13:02,408 --> 00:13:04,241
Did it help?

281
00:13:04,243 --> 00:13:06,176
I turned out great.

282
00:13:06,178 --> 00:13:07,678
You tell me.

283
00:13:07,680 --> 00:13:10,280
Let's get going.

284
00:13:10,282 --> 00:13:13,150
Are you gonna be this
mopey all the way home?

285
00:13:13,152 --> 00:13:14,685
I don't know, maybe.

286
00:13:14,687 --> 00:13:16,353
There any chance
you'd be cheered up

287
00:13:16,355 --> 00:13:18,622
by an amazing
trigonometry riddle?

288
00:13:20,259 --> 00:13:21,925
Well, if you can't
answer that,

289
00:13:21,927 --> 00:13:24,027
there's no way you're
gonna get this riddle.

290
00:13:30,936 --> 00:13:33,770
Oh, hey, hey,
what do you think?

291
00:13:33,772 --> 00:13:36,140
Just because it's a boy,
I don't think you need to

292
00:13:36,142 --> 00:13:38,609
put a picture of
genitals on his shirt.

293
00:13:38,611 --> 00:13:42,379
But that's a baseball bat
with two little baseballs.

294
00:13:42,381 --> 00:13:45,149
Okay, and now I see it.

295
00:13:46,886 --> 00:13:49,286
So, you know,
I understand why

296
00:13:49,288 --> 00:13:51,255
Howard is nervous
about having a son,

297
00:13:51,257 --> 00:13:53,223
but are you really
upset about it?

298
00:13:53,225 --> 00:13:54,858
No, I'm fine.

299
00:13:54,860 --> 00:13:56,827
It's just, I grew up
with a bunch of brothers,

300
00:13:56,829 --> 00:13:59,496
so I thought it'd be nice
for Halley to have a sister.

301
00:13:59,498 --> 00:14:00,631
Is that wrong?

302
00:14:00,633 --> 00:14:02,566
Of course it's wrong.

303
00:14:02,568 --> 00:14:04,101
You don't know what this
little boy's gonna be like.

304
00:14:04,103 --> 00:14:06,503
Maybe he'll be rough and tumble,

305
00:14:06,505 --> 00:14:08,805
or maybe he'll be sweet
and sensitive,

306
00:14:08,807 --> 00:14:12,409
or maybe he'll be
all those things, like me.

307
00:14:14,513 --> 00:14:16,480
You're rough
and tumble?

308
00:14:18,083 --> 00:14:21,151
You bet I am, bitch.

309
00:14:22,288 --> 00:14:26,823
But I'm also sensitive
and regret saying that.

310
00:14:31,130 --> 00:14:33,263
Hey.
Hello.

311
00:14:33,265 --> 00:14:35,732
You got a sec?

312
00:14:35,734 --> 00:14:36,700
Sure. What's up?

313
00:14:36,702 --> 00:14:39,036
Penny's been talking
to my mother

314
00:14:39,038 --> 00:14:42,172
like they're best friends, and
it's kind of freaking me out.

315
00:14:42,174 --> 00:14:44,775
Okay...

316
00:14:44,777 --> 00:14:48,946
I'm pretty sure
they're not best friends.

317
00:14:51,317 --> 00:14:54,451
'Cause you can only have
one best friend.

318
00:14:56,021 --> 00:14:59,389
And Penny has that,
and it's me.

319
00:15:01,060 --> 00:15:03,493
Oh, really? Is she FaceTiming
with you right now?

320
00:15:03,495 --> 00:15:05,429
Because she's FaceTiming
with my mom, and believe me,

321
00:15:05,431 --> 00:15:08,899
that is not a face
you want to spend time with.

322
00:15:08,901 --> 00:15:12,569
Hmm. Well, I have been
pretty busy lately.

323
00:15:12,571 --> 00:15:14,638
Maybe I've been
neglecting our friendship.

324
00:15:14,640 --> 00:15:16,106
Penny knows I have
a complicated relationship

325
00:15:16,108 --> 00:15:17,874
with my mother;
it's like she doesn't even care.

326
00:15:17,876 --> 00:15:19,443
And with everything
going on at the lab

327
00:15:19,445 --> 00:15:20,711
and planning the wedding,

328
00:15:20,713 --> 00:15:23,547
I just, I have
so little free time.

329
00:15:23,549 --> 00:15:26,350
Penny doesn't know how
manipulative my mother can be.

330
00:15:26,352 --> 00:15:27,651
Did you know
there's such a thing as

331
00:15:27,653 --> 00:15:29,519
reverse, reverse,
reverse psychology?

332
00:15:29,521 --> 00:15:32,856
Because... there is.

333
00:15:32,858 --> 00:15:34,358
I mean, she must feel
so abandoned.

334
00:15:34,360 --> 00:15:36,226
She's used to me
being there all the time,

335
00:15:36,228 --> 00:15:37,628
but now I have my own life,

336
00:15:37,630 --> 00:15:39,696
and she's just gonna
have to accept it.

337
00:15:39,698 --> 00:15:42,499
And why is my mom
proud of Penny and not me?

338
00:15:42,501 --> 00:15:44,568
I mean, the real question is:
why is Penny so afraid of me

339
00:15:44,570 --> 00:15:45,669
growing as a person?

340
00:15:45,671 --> 00:15:46,870
I'm good at stuff, too!

341
00:15:46,872 --> 00:15:49,339
I deserve my own life!

342
00:15:51,510 --> 00:15:53,076
Okay, well, thanks.

343
00:15:53,078 --> 00:15:54,645
Good talk.

344
00:16:00,619 --> 00:16:02,452
You know,
studies have shown

345
00:16:02,454 --> 00:16:05,589
that people distracted
by emotional issues

346
00:16:05,591 --> 00:16:07,557
are poor drivers.

347
00:16:07,559 --> 00:16:12,362
What about people distracted
by irritating passengers?

348
00:16:13,299 --> 00:16:14,798
That would be hard to test,

349
00:16:14,800 --> 00:16:17,968
because irritating is
a subjective quality.

350
00:16:17,970 --> 00:16:20,837
Strongly disagree.

351
00:16:25,711 --> 00:16:27,010
Can I drive?

352
00:16:27,012 --> 00:16:28,612
No.

353
00:16:28,614 --> 00:16:29,746
You can't drive.

354
00:16:29,748 --> 00:16:31,815
You don't even have a license.

355
00:16:31,817 --> 00:16:33,016
Actually, I do.

356
00:16:33,018 --> 00:16:36,286
Really? Since when?

357
00:16:36,288 --> 00:16:37,721
Three years ago.

358
00:16:37,723 --> 00:16:40,324
I went on a bit
of a license kick.

359
00:16:40,326 --> 00:16:43,293
I'm also
a commercial fisherman.

360
00:16:44,196 --> 00:16:46,863
Then why don't you ever
drive yourself?

361
00:16:46,865 --> 00:16:48,732
Honestly, I barely
passed my test.

362
00:16:48,734 --> 00:16:50,634
And the one time
I drove on my own,

363
00:16:50,636 --> 00:16:55,205
I made a U-turn, got dizzy,
threw up and walked home.

364
00:16:56,442 --> 00:16:58,342
You really want to drive?

365
00:16:58,344 --> 00:17:00,477
It seems like
the perfect time.

366
00:17:00,479 --> 00:17:03,213
The roads are straight,
there's no one around,

367
00:17:03,215 --> 00:17:06,483
and you don't seem to care
if you live or die.

368
00:17:06,485 --> 00:17:10,020
Live, Sheldon.
I want to live.

369
00:17:10,022 --> 00:17:11,688
That makes things
a little trickier,

370
00:17:11,690 --> 00:17:13,323
but I'll do my best.

371
00:17:17,363 --> 00:17:18,395
Hi, Pen...

372
00:17:18,397 --> 00:17:21,164
Oh, hello, Leonard.

373
00:17:22,835 --> 00:17:24,167
Hello, Mother. How are you?

374
00:17:24,169 --> 00:17:26,303
Fine. And you?
I'm great.

375
00:17:26,305 --> 00:17:28,472
Well, it's been lovely
catching up.

376
00:17:28,474 --> 00:17:31,108
Wait. Hang on.
We need to talk.

377
00:17:31,110 --> 00:17:33,877
Oh, brother.

378
00:17:33,879 --> 00:17:37,614
I want to know,
why aren't you proud of me?

379
00:17:37,616 --> 00:17:39,816
Well, isn't the real question,

380
00:17:39,818 --> 00:17:41,985
"Why aren't you proud
of yourself?"

381
00:17:41,987 --> 00:17:47,557
No, that is a question--
and I ask it a lot--

382
00:17:47,559 --> 00:17:49,860
but let's stick
with the one I asked you.

383
00:17:49,862 --> 00:17:52,629
But why do you think
I'm not proud of you?

384
00:17:52,631 --> 00:17:55,065
Because you never say it.

385
00:17:55,067 --> 00:17:56,767
But two days into
chatting with Penny,

386
00:17:56,769 --> 00:17:59,136
and you can't stop
telling her how great she is.

387
00:17:59,138 --> 00:18:00,370
She is great.

388
00:18:00,372 --> 00:18:03,440
Honestly, of all
of my children's spouses,

389
00:18:03,442 --> 00:18:05,942
she's the one
that I'm most impressed by.

390
00:18:05,944 --> 00:18:07,944
Seriously?

391
00:18:07,946 --> 00:18:09,045
Yes.

392
00:18:09,047 --> 00:18:11,448
She's confident,
she's thoughtful,

393
00:18:11,450 --> 00:18:13,650
and she never complained
about you once.

394
00:18:13,652 --> 00:18:16,987
I know what kind of strength
that takes.

395
00:18:16,989 --> 00:18:20,424
So, Penny's your favorite?

396
00:18:20,426 --> 00:18:22,893
I suppose she is.

397
00:18:22,895 --> 00:18:27,297
You married well, Leonard,
and for that I am proud of you.

398
00:18:29,968 --> 00:18:32,536
I don't... I don't...
I don't know what to say.

399
00:18:32,538 --> 00:18:36,506
I'm also proud of how hard
you're trying not to cry.

400
00:18:38,343 --> 00:18:39,676
Thank you.

401
00:18:39,678 --> 00:18:41,478
Would you like to hang up now?

402
00:18:41,480 --> 00:18:43,180
Yeah, here it comes.

403
00:18:50,456 --> 00:18:52,622
Your hands are at
10:00 and 2:00.

404
00:18:52,624 --> 00:18:55,559
Good.
Steady on the gas.

405
00:18:55,561 --> 00:18:57,360
Okay.

406
00:18:57,362 --> 00:19:01,031
Now you're gonna want
to slowly switch lanes.

407
00:19:01,033 --> 00:19:02,032
Why?

408
00:19:02,034 --> 00:19:03,900
Because there are only two,

409
00:19:03,902 --> 00:19:06,336
and you're not
in either of them.

410
00:19:10,542 --> 00:19:12,642
Attaboy. Well done!

411
00:19:12,644 --> 00:19:13,944
Thank you.

412
00:19:13,946 --> 00:19:16,446
The last time I drove,
I was terrified,

413
00:19:16,448 --> 00:19:18,048
but this is fun.

414
00:19:18,050 --> 00:19:19,916
You're doing great.

415
00:19:19,918 --> 00:19:22,085
You're a good teacher.

416
00:19:24,623 --> 00:19:28,358
Your son is going to be lucky
to have you as a father.

417
00:19:28,360 --> 00:19:30,594
Thanks.

418
00:19:33,398 --> 00:19:37,267
Do you think I could try
going a little faster?

419
00:19:37,269 --> 00:19:38,768
Go for it, champ.

420
00:19:38,770 --> 00:19:40,837
Ow.

421
00:19:40,839 --> 00:19:42,272
Sorry.

422
00:19:42,274 --> 00:19:44,441
Just ease on the gas, and...

423
00:19:44,443 --> 00:19:45,909
Oh, too much! Too much!

424
00:19:45,911 --> 00:19:48,578
Why was I scared of this?
This is exhilarating!

425
00:19:48,580 --> 00:19:49,946
No, it's not! Slow down!

426
00:19:49,948 --> 00:19:51,848
Don't tell me what to do!
You're not my father!

427
00:20:05,455 --> 00:20:07,488
Do you know how fast
you were going?

428
00:20:07,490 --> 00:20:09,924
112.

429
00:20:11,361 --> 00:20:13,294
Let me see your license.

430
00:20:14,864 --> 00:20:17,331
- Okay, here's the plan.
-No.

431
00:20:19,035 --> 00:20:20,034
Fine.

432
00:20:20,036 --> 00:20:22,103
There you go.

433
00:20:24,441 --> 00:20:27,074
You know what,
you can just keep it.

434
00:20:29,314 --> 00:20:36,214
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man