1 00:00:43,319 --> 00:00:44,711 I can smell burning. 2 00:00:45,842 --> 00:00:47,744 - _ - I can smell burning, Mum! 3 00:00:48,744 --> 00:00:51,712 - Mum! - Oh! Argh! 4 00:00:53,295 --> 00:00:56,005 Don't worry, Georgie. It's just the hair straighteners... 5 00:00:56,018 --> 00:00:57,748 These sizzling firelighters 6 00:00:57,780 --> 00:00:59,673 - have give me third-degree burns! - Nan! 7 00:00:59,698 --> 00:01:01,575 - Are you all right, Mum? - Of course she's all right. 8 00:01:01,585 --> 00:01:03,315 Bit of Savlon and she'll be right as rain. Come here. 9 00:01:03,339 --> 00:01:06,134 You smell burning flesh, you click into medic mode, Georgie! 10 00:01:06,149 --> 00:01:08,015 - Man down. - Nan, you'll live. 11 00:01:08,190 --> 00:01:10,246 Mum, you've laddered your tights. 12 00:01:10,302 --> 00:01:12,911 Right. Well, don't worry, there's plenty more. Top drawer. 13 00:01:13,270 --> 00:01:15,757 Left or right eye, Georgie?! Left. 14 00:01:15,818 --> 00:01:18,648 - Right. Left. Right. - Quick march! 15 00:01:18,667 --> 00:01:20,871 Um, er... left! 16 00:01:20,882 --> 00:01:22,580 - Really? - Yeah, left. 17 00:01:22,637 --> 00:01:23,819 Right. Cars are nearly here, 18 00:01:23,843 --> 00:01:26,136 - so you lot can stop titting about! - Max, get out! 19 00:01:26,144 --> 00:01:28,150 - You're not allowed in here. - I said no champagne! 20 00:01:28,167 --> 00:01:29,167 Are you kidding me? 21 00:01:29,184 --> 00:01:31,796 Us young ladies have got us bits out here. 22 00:01:31,800 --> 00:01:34,386 Georgie, can you please instil some urgency? 23 00:01:34,412 --> 00:01:37,437 Right, Dad, I'm on it. Prepare to launch Phase One. 24 00:01:38,006 --> 00:01:39,688 And no more champagne! 25 00:01:43,077 --> 00:01:45,605 - Cheers. - Cheers! 26 00:02:12,300 --> 00:02:17,300 - Synced and corrected by chamallow - - www.addic7ed.com - 27 00:02:20,583 --> 00:02:22,407 Look at you! 28 00:02:22,423 --> 00:02:24,422 - Looking good. - Looking fresh! 29 00:02:25,095 --> 00:02:27,661 - Hello, my love. How are you? - Good! How are you? 30 00:02:28,280 --> 00:02:30,559 Do you know the last wedding I was at, right? 31 00:02:30,560 --> 00:02:32,950 I had to do a tactical vomit in the font at the back. 32 00:02:33,565 --> 00:02:35,485 Well, I came straight from the stag do, hadn't I? 33 00:02:37,271 --> 00:02:38,394 How's Fingers? 34 00:02:38,420 --> 00:02:40,363 I haven't seen him this nervous since the bossman 35 00:02:40,373 --> 00:02:42,593 made us jump off that cliff in Bangladesh. 36 00:02:43,649 --> 00:02:45,459 Oh, my days. 37 00:02:46,305 --> 00:02:48,130 What has she come as? 38 00:02:51,160 --> 00:02:54,482 There's my lickle champion. Come here, baby, come here. 39 00:02:54,498 --> 00:02:56,426 You didn't leave me no money to pay the cab. 40 00:02:56,959 --> 00:02:58,512 Guys, this is Doris. 41 00:02:58,794 --> 00:03:01,788 Hiya. There'd better be a free bar, 42 00:03:01,860 --> 00:03:03,224 that's all I'm saying. 43 00:03:06,582 --> 00:03:08,443 She gets awkward around new people. 44 00:03:08,469 --> 00:03:10,577 Come, baby, come, come, come. 45 00:03:11,648 --> 00:03:14,735 I don't care what they're paying you, it isn't enough. 46 00:03:16,811 --> 00:03:18,682 Just keep breathing. Calm down. 47 00:03:18,693 --> 00:03:19,944 I knew I shouldn't have had those beans. 48 00:03:19,964 --> 00:03:21,179 Oh, here we go. 49 00:03:22,594 --> 00:03:24,579 Eh, taxi's here. HE SHOUTS: Taxi's here! 50 00:03:24,630 --> 00:03:26,001 That's really going to help my tinnitus. 51 00:03:26,025 --> 00:03:29,885 Our girl's getting married, mother! Taxi's here. 52 00:03:30,059 --> 00:03:31,793 Taxis are here. 53 00:03:32,080 --> 00:03:33,633 Come on, in there. Come on. 54 00:03:33,654 --> 00:03:35,035 Taxis are here. 55 00:03:35,376 --> 00:03:37,232 I'm paying by the hour, so I don't care 56 00:03:37,240 --> 00:03:39,785 if you're in your knickers or not. Come on. Thank you. Lovely. 57 00:03:39,816 --> 00:03:40,867 Let's go. 58 00:03:41,887 --> 00:03:45,333 Gracie, does my facilitator make me look like an alien? 59 00:03:45,558 --> 00:03:47,496 - Be honest. - You are a bloody alien! 60 00:03:47,522 --> 00:03:49,755 - You look lovely, Mum. - Exterminate! 61 00:03:49,758 --> 00:03:50,999 - Exterminate! - YOU! 62 00:03:51,019 --> 00:03:52,624 I'll terminate you. 63 00:03:52,680 --> 00:03:55,211 - Bleeding... - It's a fascinator, you daft bat! 64 00:03:55,232 --> 00:03:56,637 - Whatever! - You two, behave! 65 00:03:56,662 --> 00:03:58,518 My beads are coming off. 66 00:04:04,040 --> 00:04:06,054 Oh, Marie! 67 00:04:09,797 --> 00:04:11,038 Perfect. 68 00:04:13,492 --> 00:04:14,513 Yep. 69 00:04:14,682 --> 00:04:17,210 Let's hope the groom turns up this time. 70 00:04:17,261 --> 00:04:18,845 No offence, Georgie. 71 00:04:18,917 --> 00:04:20,143 Oh, Nan. 72 00:04:20,268 --> 00:04:22,645 Who could take offence at anything you say, eh? 73 00:04:22,825 --> 00:04:25,716 Right, come on. Chop, chop! 74 00:04:28,213 --> 00:04:29,439 Come on. 75 00:04:29,664 --> 00:04:31,658 I can't breathe, Georgie. 76 00:04:32,114 --> 00:04:33,273 Listen... 77 00:04:34,293 --> 00:04:35,872 It's going to be amazing. 78 00:04:37,842 --> 00:04:39,380 You're amazing. 79 00:04:39,505 --> 00:04:41,107 Am I going to be all right 80 00:04:41,881 --> 00:04:43,194 at being a wife? I mean... 81 00:04:43,204 --> 00:04:45,783 it's like a lifetime commitment. 82 00:04:45,788 --> 00:04:47,259 You're going to be brilliant. 83 00:04:48,546 --> 00:04:50,226 You're not having second thoughts, are you? 84 00:04:50,474 --> 00:04:51,879 Are you joking? 85 00:04:51,915 --> 00:04:54,534 I'm pinching myself. I love him so much 86 00:04:54,555 --> 00:04:57,446 - it actually scares me a little bit, Georgie. - Well, he loves you too, 87 00:04:57,703 --> 00:04:59,933 so it's a match made in frigging heaven. 88 00:05:01,594 --> 00:05:03,517 Everything tickety boo, chaps? 89 00:05:03,642 --> 00:05:06,367 Bricks are currently being shat, Your Majesty. 90 00:05:11,263 --> 00:05:12,617 Got the rings? 91 00:05:13,083 --> 00:05:14,155 Check. 92 00:05:15,554 --> 00:05:16,789 Speech? 93 00:05:16,815 --> 00:05:18,630 It's all up here, fella. I'm going to wing it... 94 00:05:18,650 --> 00:05:19,876 make it up as I go along. 95 00:05:21,393 --> 00:05:23,142 If you mention that bar in Kenya... 96 00:05:23,178 --> 00:05:24,890 Aw, like I'd ever do that. 97 00:05:55,616 --> 00:05:57,026 You look beautiful, 98 00:05:57,303 --> 00:05:58,595 like, really beautiful. 99 00:05:58,954 --> 00:06:00,374 Perfect, babe. 100 00:06:00,446 --> 00:06:02,968 You don't look too minging yourself, fella. 101 00:06:04,481 --> 00:06:06,275 Last of the true romantics! 102 00:06:06,649 --> 00:06:09,166 We have come together in the presence of God 103 00:06:09,196 --> 00:06:12,063 to witness the marriage of Frankie and Marie, 104 00:06:12,188 --> 00:06:14,226 to ask his blessing on them 105 00:06:14,351 --> 00:06:16,092 and to rejoice with them. 106 00:06:17,199 --> 00:06:19,578 The union of husband and wife in heart 107 00:06:19,661 --> 00:06:23,557 and mind and body is given for their mutual comfort 108 00:06:23,609 --> 00:06:26,654 and help in prosperity and adversity. 109 00:06:36,144 --> 00:06:37,810 Let us pray. 110 00:06:42,046 --> 00:06:43,376 Eternal God, 111 00:06:43,501 --> 00:06:45,251 creator and preserver of all, 112 00:06:45,289 --> 00:06:47,096 giver of spiritual grace and author 113 00:06:47,116 --> 00:06:48,690 - of everlasting life, - _ 114 00:06:48,726 --> 00:06:51,308 send your blessing on Frankie and Marie. 115 00:06:51,756 --> 00:06:55,423 Amen. Now that Frankie and Marie have given their consent, 116 00:06:55,468 --> 00:06:57,634 I declare that they are man and wife. 117 00:06:58,275 --> 00:06:59,967 You may kiss the bride. 118 00:07:07,055 --> 00:07:08,719 Thank you. 119 00:07:08,991 --> 00:07:11,911 - Georgie, come and dance with us. - Nah, I can't. I'm doing the rounds, 120 00:07:11,937 --> 00:07:13,762 making sure everyone's happy in my role as 121 00:07:13,777 --> 00:07:15,638 - head of ambience, thank you. - Hey. 122 00:07:15,690 --> 00:07:18,873 - State of your nan, she'll be going home in an ambience! - Oh, God. 123 00:07:20,837 --> 00:07:22,279 You all right, Nan? 124 00:07:22,800 --> 00:07:26,553 - Live your dreams, darling. Live your dreams. - I will. 125 00:07:26,605 --> 00:07:29,656 And you're going to live your dreams an' all, aren't you, love? 126 00:07:29,681 --> 00:07:32,219 - OK. - Are you going to show me your weapon later? 127 00:07:32,240 --> 00:07:35,582 - OK! Georgie? Hello? - Mate! 128 00:07:37,787 --> 00:07:40,530 Hey, here she comes! The big girl. Thank you. 129 00:07:40,545 --> 00:07:42,852 - When are we going to have our dance, then, Georgie? - In these shoes, Dad, 130 00:07:42,862 --> 00:07:43,975 I don't think so! 131 00:07:43,995 --> 00:07:46,676 Thank you. Oh, your dad wants a dance with you. 132 00:07:46,717 --> 00:07:48,978 Mum, my toes couldn't take it. 133 00:07:48,994 --> 00:07:51,555 Oh, she's only ever happy in her army boots, aren't you? 134 00:07:52,192 --> 00:07:53,955 Honestly, these are so high! 135 00:07:53,987 --> 00:07:55,633 Oh, bless you. Let's have a look. 136 00:07:55,644 --> 00:07:56,848 Look. Oh, yeah. 137 00:07:58,063 --> 00:07:59,478 ? So at my show on Monday ? 138 00:07:59,494 --> 00:08:00,995 ? I was hoping someday ? 139 00:08:01,020 --> 00:08:03,571 - ? You'd be on your way to better things ? - Hey. 140 00:08:03,583 --> 00:08:04,842 Your day'll come. 141 00:08:06,020 --> 00:08:08,025 Mum! You're starting to sound like Nan. 142 00:08:08,034 --> 00:08:09,384 You'll be telling me to live my dreams next. 143 00:08:09,408 --> 00:08:11,310 I just want you to be happy, that's all. 144 00:08:11,335 --> 00:08:13,104 I know. Of course you do. But I am. 145 00:08:13,129 --> 00:08:15,995 - I am happy. - No, I mean properly happy. 146 00:08:16,000 --> 00:08:18,153 Are you saying I can't be happy without a man? 147 00:08:18,558 --> 00:08:20,219 - No, I... - Jeez, Mum! 148 00:08:20,278 --> 00:08:23,083 ? Not about to lie down for your cause ? 149 00:08:23,100 --> 00:08:24,757 ? But you don't pull my strings ? 150 00:08:24,774 --> 00:08:26,494 ? 'Cause I'm a better man ? 151 00:08:26,717 --> 00:08:29,211 ? Moving on to better things ? 152 00:08:29,383 --> 00:08:32,559 ? Well, uh-oh, oh, I love her because... ? 153 00:08:32,754 --> 00:08:35,091 - Don't say anything, Kingy. - Hey. Wouldn't dream of it. 154 00:08:35,163 --> 00:08:37,162 I'm all right. I'm all right. 155 00:08:37,900 --> 00:08:39,838 Hey, hey. 156 00:08:41,109 --> 00:08:42,924 - You are, mate. - Thank you. 157 00:08:44,698 --> 00:08:45,995 Look... 158 00:08:46,533 --> 00:08:48,312 give it time, you know... 159 00:08:48,343 --> 00:08:50,359 - No, let me stop you. Let me stop you. - Sure... Hey, hey. 160 00:08:50,383 --> 00:08:51,646 - You don't even know what I'm going to say! - Mate, I do! 161 00:08:51,670 --> 00:08:53,477 I do know what you're going to say. All right, listen... 162 00:08:53,501 --> 00:08:54,808 I'm not looking for anything. 163 00:08:54,823 --> 00:08:57,326 I'm married to my job now that I'm a sergeant. 164 00:08:57,389 --> 00:08:58,981 ? But you don't pull my strings ? 165 00:08:58,997 --> 00:09:00,583 ? 'Cause I'm a better man ? 166 00:09:00,620 --> 00:09:02,880 ? Moving on to better things ? 167 00:09:02,904 --> 00:09:04,624 - ? Well, uh-oh, oh, ? - Are you all packed? 168 00:09:05,468 --> 00:09:07,995 - You don't need too much for The Sand. - That's true. 169 00:09:08,221 --> 00:09:10,919 Hey. Who have you got up your sleeve for us, Lane? 170 00:09:10,920 --> 00:09:13,682 We'll need a good medic to fill your size fives! 171 00:09:13,697 --> 00:09:16,682 You'll be meeting her on "mission-specific training". 172 00:09:19,985 --> 00:09:21,810 _ 173 00:09:22,176 --> 00:09:26,318 ? But uh oh, she came to my show ? 174 00:09:26,357 --> 00:09:27,528 I'm all right. 175 00:09:28,278 --> 00:09:29,343 I'm OK. 176 00:09:32,147 --> 00:09:33,336 Come on, Nan! 177 00:09:33,398 --> 00:09:37,133 - Up the wooden hill to Lancashire for you. - I'm having a nightcap first. 178 00:09:37,152 --> 00:09:39,278 Don't you think you've had enough, you drunken old sot? 179 00:09:39,302 --> 00:09:42,557 - Don't call her that. - Hey, I said sot, not sod. 180 00:09:42,593 --> 00:09:44,879 Mind you, if the facilitator fits... 181 00:09:45,905 --> 00:09:47,638 Me shoes are squelching. 182 00:09:47,673 --> 00:09:49,222 I know, well, they will be, won't they, 183 00:09:49,237 --> 00:09:50,698 after what you've just done in the lift? 184 00:09:50,720 --> 00:09:53,687 ? Let's go to Lancashire! ? 185 00:09:54,082 --> 00:09:56,236 All right. Night, Nan. 186 00:09:56,261 --> 00:09:58,143 - Night. - Night, love. 187 00:09:58,158 --> 00:09:59,701 - Night, Dad. - Love ya. 188 00:09:59,727 --> 00:10:00,890 Love you. 189 00:10:03,638 --> 00:10:06,335 - Approximately nine dead... - Request air support... 190 00:10:07,340 --> 00:10:10,155 - Suspected IED on rooftop... - ELVIS! 191 00:10:20,829 --> 00:10:23,599 Put your head up, how do you know it's not going to get blown off? 192 00:10:23,838 --> 00:10:26,412 A dead medic is no good to anyone. 193 00:10:26,422 --> 00:10:28,878 Now, get your eyes on your Colour Sergeant! 194 00:10:28,909 --> 00:10:30,211 Right, guys. 195 00:10:30,596 --> 00:10:31,791 On my command, 196 00:10:31,826 --> 00:10:35,036 we move out of the trench, 0s, 5s and 20s. 197 00:10:35,161 --> 00:10:38,486 Fan out and protect so the medic can make way to casualty. 198 00:10:38,532 --> 00:10:40,195 Prepare to move... 199 00:10:40,666 --> 00:10:41,824 move! 200 00:10:42,009 --> 00:10:45,035 The days of shouting "medic" and we're safe are gone. 201 00:10:45,060 --> 00:10:47,547 You're as much of a target as any of the infantry. 202 00:10:47,598 --> 00:10:50,555 - OK. - Friendlies, forward right. 203 00:10:51,090 --> 00:10:52,890 Medic! Medic! 204 00:10:52,956 --> 00:10:54,920 Man down, cover in place. 205 00:10:54,935 --> 00:10:56,735 Assess the casualties! 206 00:10:59,267 --> 00:11:00,544 Gun. 207 00:11:03,369 --> 00:11:04,820 Let's go. 208 00:11:12,526 --> 00:11:14,335 Talk to him. Reassure him. 209 00:11:16,458 --> 00:11:17,914 What do I say? 210 00:11:17,934 --> 00:11:19,939 Well, you know how to talk, don't you, Mimi? 211 00:11:20,185 --> 00:11:21,861 Come on! We did the theory! 212 00:11:21,887 --> 00:11:23,381 We're just putting that theory into practice. 213 00:11:23,405 --> 00:11:25,319 - OK. - Tell him to keep still and ask him his name. 214 00:11:25,343 --> 00:11:28,680 Right. Keep still... and what's your name? 215 00:11:28,875 --> 00:11:31,639 - Derek. - OK, Derek, and where does it hurt? 216 00:11:32,172 --> 00:11:33,919 Take a guess. Look. 217 00:11:34,310 --> 00:11:36,847 Leg blown off, catastrophic bleed. What are you going to do? 218 00:11:37,227 --> 00:11:39,377 - Tourniquet and staunch the bleed. - Exactly! 219 00:11:39,418 --> 00:11:41,064 Look, Mimi, you know what you're doing. 220 00:11:41,105 --> 00:11:42,479 I know, but it's a little bit off-putting 221 00:11:42,494 --> 00:11:44,283 with you standing over me, know what I mean? 222 00:11:44,314 --> 00:11:46,690 Don't worry, 'cos in Afghan you're going to be on you're own. 223 00:11:46,714 --> 00:11:48,027 Get your tourniquet on! 224 00:11:48,529 --> 00:11:51,918 See? This is why we train. We train hard and we fight easy. 225 00:11:51,954 --> 00:11:54,841 You reach for your tourniquet and know exactly where it is, 226 00:11:54,877 --> 00:11:57,701 it's going to save you seconds and it could save his life. Yeah? 227 00:11:58,804 --> 00:11:59,993 Question. 228 00:12:00,608 --> 00:12:02,088 Why did you leave the first casualty? 229 00:12:02,184 --> 00:12:04,345 No pulse, so he wouldn't have made the MERT. 230 00:12:04,381 --> 00:12:07,798 - Good. - Incoming fire. Take cover. 231 00:12:13,417 --> 00:12:15,083 Don't look at me. I'm not here. 232 00:12:15,119 --> 00:12:17,199 You and your casualty need to get to cover, now! 233 00:12:17,200 --> 00:12:18,448 You heard your Platoon Commander. 234 00:12:18,472 --> 00:12:20,041 - All right. - Come on. 235 00:12:20,166 --> 00:12:22,004 Everyone into the safe vehicle... 236 00:12:22,025 --> 00:12:24,285 hot extraction out of the danger zone. 237 00:12:24,342 --> 00:12:27,166 - The MERT can't land, take the casualty. - Get him in the vehicle, 238 00:12:27,186 --> 00:12:28,786 and monitor his vital signs, OK? 239 00:12:28,822 --> 00:12:32,343 - Mind you, his vital signs are going to be fine! - Get him into the vehicle, now! 240 00:12:33,117 --> 00:12:35,317 Throbber, can you come give me a hand with this, please? 241 00:12:35,481 --> 00:12:37,588 All right, fella. Let's get you on your foot. 242 00:12:42,781 --> 00:12:45,436 Move along the safe route back towards the farm. 243 00:12:46,431 --> 00:12:48,718 I tell you, I was gutted to miss out on Herrick. 244 00:12:49,261 --> 00:12:51,456 My dad was on the first Herrick tour. 245 00:12:53,015 --> 00:12:55,337 Still, at least we'll be out there, in The Sand. 246 00:12:56,332 --> 00:12:58,053 You're training and security, sir. 247 00:12:58,105 --> 00:13:01,022 Hang on. Here we go. Prepare to detonate... 248 00:13:01,147 --> 00:13:02,447 ... detonate. 249 00:13:06,585 --> 00:13:07,887 Not bad. 250 00:13:07,920 --> 00:13:10,639 You shit yourself, Prof? 251 00:13:10,640 --> 00:13:12,169 Ugh! 252 00:13:12,636 --> 00:13:15,342 - The Prof just shat, guys! - Give it a rest. 253 00:13:15,343 --> 00:13:17,280 I didn't know the whiz-bangs were going to be that loud. 254 00:13:17,285 --> 00:13:19,444 Listen, Pirbright had us training with even louder ones, Prof. 255 00:13:19,465 --> 00:13:21,967 Concentrate. Fingers, call it in. 256 00:13:22,044 --> 00:13:24,520 Prof, Monk, prepare tactical theatre procedures... 257 00:13:24,556 --> 00:13:27,884 One zero Charlie to zero, contact, wait out, 258 00:13:28,099 --> 00:13:30,266 moving casualty, firefight, 259 00:13:30,297 --> 00:13:32,590 - vehicle incapacitated. - Roger that. 260 00:13:32,600 --> 00:13:35,199 Right, guys. Treat as ambush, evacuate zero, 261 00:13:35,235 --> 00:13:37,280 remembering your 0s, 5s and 20s, 262 00:13:37,405 --> 00:13:41,156 bounce to safe area, dig in and await further instruction. 263 00:13:41,366 --> 00:13:43,576 Fingers, with electronic counter measure bubble. 264 00:13:43,607 --> 00:13:45,991 Safe area, 50 metres east. Let's move. 265 00:13:46,001 --> 00:13:47,267 All right, let's go! 266 00:13:47,392 --> 00:13:49,430 - Real emergency, guys. - Colour! 267 00:13:52,711 --> 00:13:55,117 - Whoa! - Come on, mate. Up you get. 268 00:13:55,378 --> 00:13:56,693 Come on, up you get, mate. 269 00:13:56,716 --> 00:13:58,049 How's the patient, medic? 270 00:13:58,084 --> 00:14:00,630 - Stable, Colour Sergeant. - Unlike the Prof. 271 00:14:00,639 --> 00:14:01,639 Knock it on the head. 272 00:14:01,640 --> 00:14:03,123 What are you going to do? Put me in detention? 273 00:14:03,235 --> 00:14:04,800 Right. Once cover's in place, 274 00:14:04,821 --> 00:14:07,056 we move him into the safety area. 275 00:14:07,733 --> 00:14:09,851 - Real emergency, guys. - Colour! 276 00:14:11,814 --> 00:14:14,039 Textbook. You agree, Sergeant Lane? 277 00:14:14,300 --> 00:14:16,643 No plan survives contact with the enemy, sir. 278 00:14:17,310 --> 00:14:18,806 The back doors are open. 279 00:14:18,931 --> 00:14:20,965 No-one was checking for snipers. 280 00:14:21,216 --> 00:14:23,620 ECM can't protect you from a bullet in the head, sir. 281 00:14:26,250 --> 00:14:27,685 Right, 2 section. 282 00:14:27,711 --> 00:14:29,885 - All round defence. - Colour! 283 00:14:29,936 --> 00:14:31,439 That's mission complete. 284 00:14:32,125 --> 00:14:33,863 Excellent, great effort, guys. 285 00:14:33,879 --> 00:14:35,201 On me for a debrief. 286 00:14:35,248 --> 00:14:38,221 - Is that me... finished? - Yes, mate! You're officially dead. 287 00:14:38,293 --> 00:14:40,079 Throbber, on me. 288 00:14:40,204 --> 00:14:43,072 - Relax. You did well. - Really? 289 00:14:43,821 --> 00:14:45,497 I asked him where it hurt 290 00:14:45,508 --> 00:14:47,507 and he'd just had his leg blown off! 291 00:14:50,111 --> 00:14:53,094 Work hard and be an asset to the section. 292 00:14:54,038 --> 00:14:55,150 You're good. 293 00:14:55,366 --> 00:14:57,519 Always treat it as an ambush. 294 00:14:58,088 --> 00:15:00,682 One explosion may be followed by more explosions 295 00:15:00,713 --> 00:15:02,679 or direct or indirect gun fire. 296 00:15:03,149 --> 00:15:05,910 Now, who was covering the Prof when he was getting out of the vehicle? 297 00:15:06,477 --> 00:15:09,748 We can return fire if positive identification of the enemy 298 00:15:09,779 --> 00:15:10,987 is made in accordance 299 00:15:10,995 --> 00:15:12,997 - _ - with the rules of engagement... Throbber... 300 00:15:13,362 --> 00:15:14,642 tell me what the plan was. 301 00:15:14,694 --> 00:15:16,356 Move out of the kill zone, sir... 302 00:15:16,586 --> 00:15:18,416 For I am too pretty to die. 303 00:15:18,442 --> 00:15:20,426 Oi. Oi! 304 00:15:20,734 --> 00:15:23,558 When you're asked a question by an officer on a training exercise, 305 00:15:23,589 --> 00:15:25,850 you answer it to the best of your ability, 306 00:15:25,975 --> 00:15:28,177 with the respect due. Understood? 307 00:15:30,520 --> 00:15:31,848 Private Grant? 308 00:15:32,801 --> 00:15:35,945 Move to the best location in order to reconsolidate 309 00:15:35,981 --> 00:15:37,754 and further assess the situation. 310 00:15:37,837 --> 00:15:40,959 Keep security 360 degrees at all times, sir. 311 00:15:40,960 --> 00:15:42,430 That's how it's done 312 00:15:42,774 --> 00:15:44,584 and that's how you address an officer. 313 00:15:44,784 --> 00:15:48,250 Right, guys, inside, shower, scoff and prepare for a kit inspection. 314 00:15:53,669 --> 00:15:55,284 I'm loving all this, Kingy! 315 00:15:55,643 --> 00:15:58,160 Indeed... sir. 316 00:15:58,904 --> 00:16:01,139 - Do you like him, then, or what? - Who? 317 00:16:01,264 --> 00:16:02,739 The new boss. 318 00:16:03,815 --> 00:16:05,322 He's Grade 8 trumpet. 319 00:16:06,035 --> 00:16:09,029 - What does that mean? - No, I genuinely mean it. 320 00:16:09,044 --> 00:16:11,289 He's Grade 8 trumpet! 321 00:16:11,340 --> 00:16:13,350 Walks around the barracks playing the thing! 322 00:16:13,360 --> 00:16:15,247 I can't get it out of my head! It's my earworm 323 00:16:15,258 --> 00:16:16,995 when I lie down to sleep. 324 00:16:17,518 --> 00:16:20,635 I could do with another grown-up coming away on tour with me. 325 00:16:21,395 --> 00:16:22,999 I think you'll cope, Kingy. 326 00:16:24,609 --> 00:16:26,757 Wish you'd come back and join the platoon. 327 00:16:27,326 --> 00:16:29,110 Need someone with some miles on the clock... 328 00:16:29,125 --> 00:16:32,573 - Oh, thanks. Nice! - You know what I mean. 329 00:16:33,362 --> 00:16:35,515 This lot's still fresh off the forecourt. 330 00:16:36,218 --> 00:16:37,910 Your country needs you. 331 00:16:38,166 --> 00:16:40,181 Or rather, I need you. 332 00:16:40,873 --> 00:16:42,211 Come on. 333 00:16:42,336 --> 00:16:44,072 Training and security. 334 00:16:44,197 --> 00:16:47,133 - You'd be in the safety of Kabul. - Nah, you're all right, Kingy. 335 00:16:48,080 --> 00:16:50,315 Yeah. I know. 336 00:16:50,871 --> 00:16:52,291 Afghan... 337 00:16:52,650 --> 00:16:55,000 must fuck with your head. All those men we lost. 338 00:16:57,018 --> 00:17:00,350 Elvis isn't the reason why I'm not coming back, Kingy. 339 00:17:01,380 --> 00:17:02,999 I've found my niche here. 340 00:17:03,518 --> 00:17:05,303 I'm a good instructor. 341 00:17:05,328 --> 00:17:07,343 And to be honest, as weird as this sounds, 342 00:17:07,594 --> 00:17:10,291 I'm enjoying being back home with the rents! 343 00:17:11,409 --> 00:17:12,595 Look. 344 00:17:12,829 --> 00:17:14,079 You're a good medic 345 00:17:14,382 --> 00:17:15,859 and a top soldier. 346 00:17:15,984 --> 00:17:18,910 That's why we miss you and the platoon do too. 347 00:17:20,012 --> 00:17:21,275 Listen. 348 00:17:21,657 --> 00:17:23,599 Private Saunders is going to be good. 349 00:17:24,302 --> 00:17:27,214 Spend a penny and save a pound's worth of trouble with her. 350 00:17:27,389 --> 00:17:29,921 Right. That'll do me, then. 351 00:17:30,644 --> 00:17:33,159 Oh... need a bit of a favour from you tonight. 352 00:17:33,160 --> 00:17:34,506 Go on? 353 00:17:36,823 --> 00:17:39,827 I am, like, officially, the best drinker in Wolverhampton. 354 00:17:39,863 --> 00:17:41,626 Well, we all gotta be good at something. 355 00:17:41,636 --> 00:17:44,416 I bet you've had some mental nights out in Wolverhampton-wick. 356 00:17:45,390 --> 00:17:47,846 First night out as a married man, boys. Best look after me. 357 00:17:47,877 --> 00:17:50,155 I get that you want to smell nice for the disco, but... 358 00:17:50,173 --> 00:17:52,946 Disco? How are we getting there? By the fucking TARDIS? 359 00:17:53,910 --> 00:17:56,547 You look fine, Mimi. 360 00:17:56,572 --> 00:17:58,155 You going to ask me if I twerk next? 361 00:17:58,533 --> 00:18:01,148 - Just being nice. - You wearing that shirt for a bet, Monk? 362 00:18:02,288 --> 00:18:03,879 That's bad. 363 00:18:03,880 --> 00:18:06,147 - You coming out tonight, George? - Yep. 364 00:18:06,172 --> 00:18:08,870 Kingy's asked me to keep an eye on you muppets. Shark watch! 365 00:18:08,909 --> 00:18:10,575 You're just keeping an eye on your brother-in-law. 366 00:18:10,594 --> 00:18:13,369 - Report back to Marie? - Have you spoken to her today? 367 00:18:13,394 --> 00:18:15,631 Yes, but I couldn't get a word in edgeways, mate. 368 00:18:15,669 --> 00:18:17,957 She's sorting out our honeymoon for when I go on R&R. 369 00:18:17,995 --> 00:18:21,065 - My man is loved up. - Yes. I'm a one-man woman, bro. 370 00:18:21,097 --> 00:18:22,712 One-woman man, Fingers. 371 00:18:22,757 --> 00:18:25,313 - Is it? - I'd never cheat on my Doris. 372 00:18:25,365 --> 00:18:28,569 - You wouldn't dare, you. - So, Prof, you're the only singleton here. 373 00:18:28,613 --> 00:18:30,364 - Come on. Get ready. - You've got to be single, Throbber. 374 00:18:30,379 --> 00:18:32,564 Mate, I've got about nine sorts on the go. 375 00:18:32,600 --> 00:18:34,639 Don't you worry about my legendary cockerel. 376 00:18:34,640 --> 00:18:36,465 Na, na, na. I'm single an' all. 377 00:18:36,491 --> 00:18:37,660 - Is it? - Mm. 378 00:18:37,675 --> 00:18:39,531 Prof, meet Mimi. 379 00:18:39,557 --> 00:18:41,192 You swiping left or right, fella? 380 00:18:41,228 --> 00:18:43,489 - What's going on, Prof? - I don't drink, 381 00:18:43,505 --> 00:18:45,550 - it's a good book and... - If you don't give us an "and" 382 00:18:45,566 --> 00:18:47,852 in the next two seconds, you're going with them, Prof. 383 00:18:47,863 --> 00:18:51,989 One, two... right, that's it! Get changed. That's an order. 384 00:18:52,040 --> 00:18:54,560 He's actually being serious. We never leave a man behind. Sorry. 385 00:18:55,075 --> 00:18:57,521 Right. I'll put on my new Paisley shirt. 386 00:18:57,706 --> 00:19:00,299 - Heads will turn. - Like the Exorcist. 387 00:19:01,304 --> 00:19:03,914 - Here, what's that trumpet noise? - That's the bossman, Mimi. 388 00:19:04,338 --> 00:19:07,456 - Why's he playing the trumpet? - 'Cos he's a Rupert, babe. 389 00:19:17,719 --> 00:19:20,837 Right. Bonus beer for anyone who can tell me what I was just playing! 390 00:19:21,200 --> 00:19:23,881 The trumpet, sir! Yes! 391 00:19:25,589 --> 00:19:27,959 What? What are you all laughing at? 392 00:19:27,960 --> 00:19:30,519 - That's a fucking trumpet, ain't it? - Prof? 393 00:19:30,520 --> 00:19:32,279 Triumphal... 394 00:19:32,726 --> 00:19:34,141 - ... March? - By? 395 00:19:34,597 --> 00:19:36,284 Giuseppe Verdi? 396 00:19:37,140 --> 00:19:39,278 Colour Sergeant, make a note! Bonus beer for that man. 397 00:19:39,308 --> 00:19:40,775 He doesn't even drink, boss. 398 00:19:40,800 --> 00:19:42,758 - I can have a mocktail. - Ooh! 399 00:19:42,768 --> 00:19:47,776 Right, guys, minibus departing from outside here at 2000 hours. 400 00:19:47,801 --> 00:19:52,384 Estimated time of arrival at Two Lips Karaoke Bar, 2020. 401 00:19:52,416 --> 00:19:54,953 Three drinks of your choice. 402 00:19:54,978 --> 00:19:59,080 2230, you will reboard the minibus for the journey back to camp. 403 00:19:59,093 --> 00:20:02,998 - Any questions? - Yes, Colour, how many drinks is three? 404 00:20:03,024 --> 00:20:05,074 - As long as we don't see... ? - We see everything. 405 00:20:07,991 --> 00:20:09,058 Three. 406 00:20:09,183 --> 00:20:10,258 We all got that? 407 00:20:10,304 --> 00:20:11,549 Colour. 408 00:20:11,621 --> 00:20:14,097 Right then, chaps. Pip, pip. 409 00:20:24,658 --> 00:20:26,374 What was that? 410 00:20:26,499 --> 00:20:28,801 Mate, he's got the whitest ankles I've seen in my life. 411 00:20:37,660 --> 00:20:39,195 They're a good bunch, Kingy. 412 00:20:39,823 --> 00:20:41,177 Remember, sir... 413 00:20:41,302 --> 00:20:43,392 ... one day you're going to need to give them a bollocking 414 00:20:43,397 --> 00:20:44,917 and they're going to need to listen... 415 00:20:44,998 --> 00:20:46,186 ... sir. 416 00:20:46,940 --> 00:20:49,599 One singer, one song, Colour Sergeant King. 417 00:20:50,113 --> 00:20:51,795 I know how to lead my men, 418 00:20:52,395 --> 00:20:54,090 but thank you for the advice. 419 00:20:54,215 --> 00:20:55,599 You're the officer, sir. 420 00:20:55,681 --> 00:20:57,214 What song are you singing, Kingy? 421 00:20:57,768 --> 00:21:00,079 - I don't think so. - Look. 422 00:21:00,597 --> 00:21:03,360 It's not going to do the guys any harm to see you let your hair down. 423 00:21:07,677 --> 00:21:09,349 I sing one song, 424 00:21:10,354 --> 00:21:12,189 you don't take that trumpet on tour. 425 00:21:12,314 --> 00:21:14,029 What are you saying about my trumpet? 426 00:21:16,136 --> 00:21:19,556 Put a Taliban warlord and that trumpet next to each other, 427 00:21:19,985 --> 00:21:22,133 I dunno which I'd shoot first. 428 00:21:22,152 --> 00:21:23,479 Sir. 429 00:21:23,604 --> 00:21:27,131 One song, and this trumpet stays at home. 430 00:21:27,778 --> 00:21:30,855 ? Oh, you to me are everything ? 431 00:21:30,862 --> 00:21:34,291 ? The sweetest song that I can sing, oh, baby ? 432 00:21:34,797 --> 00:21:36,399 ? Oh, baby ? 433 00:21:36,816 --> 00:21:39,964 ? To you I guess I'm just a clown ? 434 00:21:39,988 --> 00:21:43,712 ? Who picks you up each time you're down, oh, baby... ? 435 00:21:43,837 --> 00:21:47,803 - Don't you think you've had enough? - Don't judge me, 'cos you're boring. 436 00:21:54,295 --> 00:21:56,602 I can see why you don't imbibe, Prof. 437 00:21:56,727 --> 00:21:58,730 Oh. Imbibe. 438 00:21:59,460 --> 00:22:00,742 Exactly. 439 00:22:00,867 --> 00:22:02,735 My mum liked a sherry as well, so... 440 00:22:02,792 --> 00:22:04,561 ... it's put me off for life. 441 00:22:06,465 --> 00:22:08,938 So you're not in the mosh pit with the rest of the dudes? 442 00:22:09,002 --> 00:22:11,400 Mm, I think not. 443 00:22:13,572 --> 00:22:15,449 Are you looking forward to Afghan? 444 00:22:15,834 --> 00:22:18,532 It's got to be better than playground duty, hasn't it? 445 00:22:20,140 --> 00:22:24,005 Can't believe you were a history teacher at my old school. 446 00:22:24,037 --> 00:22:25,979 - I know. - How mad is that? 447 00:22:27,037 --> 00:22:30,441 How come, like, well... why? 448 00:22:30,480 --> 00:22:33,697 How did I end up here with this absolute shower of... 449 00:22:33,722 --> 00:22:36,804 - ... who are even more gobby than me old Year 8s? - Yes! 450 00:22:36,845 --> 00:22:40,071 - I don't know. - I mean, you've got a degree. 451 00:22:40,091 --> 00:22:41,414 Why didn't you go to Sandhurst? 452 00:22:41,470 --> 00:22:43,121 This is what I wanted. 453 00:22:43,649 --> 00:22:45,674 I wanted to be an ordinary soldier. 454 00:22:46,002 --> 00:22:47,961 Leave someone else to give the orders. 455 00:22:47,996 --> 00:22:51,365 ? ... The sweetest song that I can sing, oh, baby ? 456 00:22:51,406 --> 00:22:52,564 ? Oh, Colour! ? 457 00:22:52,689 --> 00:22:54,989 If you want to be an ordinary soldier, 458 00:22:55,604 --> 00:22:57,660 maybe you should start behaving like one. 459 00:22:58,254 --> 00:23:00,121 - Are you saying... ? - Mm-hm. 460 00:23:00,126 --> 00:23:01,680 - Go on! Go on. - What, you want me to go down? 461 00:23:01,704 --> 00:23:03,739 Yes, I do. Please do. 462 00:23:03,791 --> 00:23:05,052 I'll hold your glass. 463 00:23:05,072 --> 00:23:06,999 - Thank you. - Mosh pit, here I come. 464 00:23:07,214 --> 00:23:08,430 Good luck. 465 00:23:28,785 --> 00:23:31,256 ? I need to know now ? 466 00:23:31,276 --> 00:23:33,455 ? Know now ? 467 00:23:33,470 --> 00:23:35,700 ? Can you love me again? ? 468 00:23:36,915 --> 00:23:39,581 Sir, he needs his collar yanked! Throbber. 469 00:23:40,410 --> 00:23:43,002 Let them have a bit of fun and they run through walls for you. 470 00:23:51,738 --> 00:23:53,096 Get the fuck off! 471 00:23:53,129 --> 00:23:55,783 It's just a frigging dance. Stop being such a twat! 472 00:23:55,807 --> 00:23:58,518 Mate, do yourself a favour and don't get me at it. 473 00:23:59,139 --> 00:24:01,405 All right, mate, I ain't going to marry her. You're safe. 474 00:24:01,425 --> 00:24:03,271 Yeah? You won't be in a minute. 475 00:24:03,302 --> 00:24:05,706 Whoa, whoa. You step away, Throbber, and you just calm down! 476 00:24:05,720 --> 00:24:08,234 - Oi! - You need to fuck off now! 477 00:24:08,254 --> 00:24:09,597 Yeah? What? 478 00:24:12,080 --> 00:24:13,351 Oi! 479 00:24:13,476 --> 00:24:16,187 - Throbber! - Throbber, chill out, yeah? Chill out! 480 00:24:16,202 --> 00:24:17,550 Relax. 481 00:24:17,571 --> 00:24:19,063 - James! - Just calm yourself down! 482 00:24:20,000 --> 00:24:22,115 - James! - Oh, shit. 483 00:24:22,144 --> 00:24:24,631 Right, lights on. I need an ambulance. 484 00:24:24,663 --> 00:24:26,817 It's all right, darling. It's OK. It's all right. 485 00:24:26,887 --> 00:24:29,354 Everybody, take two big steps back please. 486 00:24:29,393 --> 00:24:31,701 - Give them a little bit of space. - Just keep really calm. What's your name? 487 00:24:31,725 --> 00:24:33,750 - Jazz. - Jazz. OK, Jazz, 488 00:24:33,795 --> 00:24:35,820 just keep really nice and still for me. 489 00:24:35,945 --> 00:24:38,941 - Am I going to die? - No, no, we're going to look after you. 490 00:24:38,947 --> 00:24:41,939 - Do you need me to do anything, Georgie? - Yeah, I need your shirt, please. 491 00:24:41,963 --> 00:24:44,472 Listen, I'm gonna staunch the bleed and we're gonna stitch you up. 492 00:24:44,496 --> 00:24:46,201 Hey, I just need you to keep really still... 493 00:24:46,216 --> 00:24:47,828 - Here you are. - and keep breathing, OK? Thank you. 494 00:24:47,852 --> 00:24:50,713 Mimi! Come on. Jazz, you're going to be fine, OK? 495 00:24:51,759 --> 00:24:53,312 Mimi, here. 496 00:24:53,437 --> 00:24:55,891 - She's fallen on glass. - Still can't get through, Sarge. 497 00:24:55,911 --> 00:24:58,645 - OK. What should I do? - Hold that. You know what to do. 498 00:24:58,855 --> 00:25:01,184 Yeah, ambulance. Two Lips Karaoke, 499 00:25:01,204 --> 00:25:03,984 - Salisbury, please. - Right, can everyone just get back, please? 500 00:25:06,239 --> 00:25:09,226 Hello? Yeah, vital signs, cause for concern, 501 00:25:09,245 --> 00:25:11,379 possible catastrophic internal bleeding... 502 00:25:11,418 --> 00:25:13,411 The ambulance is on its way, OK? 503 00:25:15,166 --> 00:25:16,845 Mimi, keep her talking. 504 00:25:16,865 --> 00:25:19,620 - Can everyone just get back, please? - Jazz, I need you to look at me for just a second. 505 00:25:19,644 --> 00:25:22,048 That's it! You're doing great, OK? 506 00:25:22,622 --> 00:25:25,150 Female, mid-twenties, 507 00:25:25,181 --> 00:25:27,875 - right, lower right abdomen... - Were you going to, um... 508 00:25:28,712 --> 00:25:31,102 - ... were you going to sing a song? - No. 509 00:25:31,227 --> 00:25:32,537 No? 510 00:25:33,306 --> 00:25:35,474 I actually was going to sing a song. 511 00:25:35,926 --> 00:25:38,246 - Tell you what, I'll sing it for you now, shall I? - Yeah. 512 00:25:38,306 --> 00:25:42,820 ? Someone out there loves you ? 513 00:25:43,493 --> 00:25:47,681 ? Someone out there is lonely too... ? 514 00:25:48,322 --> 00:25:51,147 I cannot believe what I've just witnessed tonight. 515 00:25:51,172 --> 00:25:53,664 - Any word, boss? - Transfused and stabilised. 516 00:25:53,789 --> 00:25:56,240 - Sir. - Look. We might not be donning our uniforms 517 00:25:56,255 --> 00:25:58,844 but we're still soldiers, 24/7. 518 00:25:58,916 --> 00:26:01,312 We represent our country. We never forget that. 519 00:26:02,780 --> 00:26:04,560 We avoid any hot spots 520 00:26:04,561 --> 00:26:07,057 and tactically withdraw from any potential contact. 521 00:26:07,068 --> 00:26:09,216 - Do you understand? - Sir. 522 00:26:10,128 --> 00:26:11,558 Clearly, you don't, Throbber. 523 00:26:12,255 --> 00:26:13,881 You put us all in danger. 524 00:26:14,906 --> 00:26:17,273 If you're that irresponsible having a quiet drink in town, 525 00:26:17,294 --> 00:26:19,028 how much of a liability are you going to be out in Afghan? 526 00:26:19,052 --> 00:26:20,471 Excuse me, sir... 527 00:26:20,482 --> 00:26:22,989 To be fair to the Throbber... the sort was coming on to him. 528 00:26:23,512 --> 00:26:25,393 He weren't doing too much wrong in my book. 529 00:26:25,418 --> 00:26:28,555 Maybe I shouldn't have given her the grind back. My bad, sir. 530 00:26:29,258 --> 00:26:30,709 Sorry, sir. 531 00:26:31,031 --> 00:26:32,379 It won't happen again. 532 00:26:32,420 --> 00:26:33,825 Youthful exuberance... 533 00:26:33,835 --> 00:26:38,121 Youthful exuberance nearly ended up with a fatality. 534 00:26:48,579 --> 00:26:52,019 Start to be an asset to the platoon and not a liability... 535 00:26:52,645 --> 00:26:55,059 you weapons-grade flange flannel. 536 00:27:00,125 --> 00:27:02,434 - What's a flannel? - Word of advice... 537 00:27:02,762 --> 00:27:04,572 say nothing and go to bed. 538 00:27:14,313 --> 00:27:16,892 _ 539 00:27:16,933 --> 00:27:21,983 _ 540 00:28:03,242 --> 00:28:05,119 You all right? 541 00:28:07,279 --> 00:28:09,195 I thought she was dead, Sergeant. 542 00:28:09,214 --> 00:28:11,508 You got her to the ambulance alive. You did your job. 543 00:28:11,540 --> 00:28:14,320 No, I don't think I would have done that on my own. 544 00:28:16,314 --> 00:28:19,105 - I shat myself. - We all shit ourselves. 545 00:28:19,726 --> 00:28:22,238 You think I don't shit myself every time I hear "man down"? 546 00:28:22,258 --> 00:28:24,084 I know, but there's shitting yourself and, 547 00:28:24,110 --> 00:28:26,482 you know, carrying on and there's shitting yourself and freezing. 548 00:28:26,506 --> 00:28:28,961 Mimi, you didn't freeze. You did it. 549 00:28:28,967 --> 00:28:30,768 YOU did it. 550 00:28:33,511 --> 00:28:35,465 Prof's shirt's fucked. 551 00:28:40,169 --> 00:28:42,220 Did you always fancy the army? 552 00:28:43,118 --> 00:28:46,584 I think my parents thought university would have been better... 553 00:28:46,709 --> 00:28:49,149 They must be proud of you now, though... passing out and that. 554 00:28:49,378 --> 00:28:51,711 Mmm. They've got my... 555 00:28:52,678 --> 00:28:56,588 ... they've got my passing out photo on the piano. 556 00:29:00,042 --> 00:29:04,220 I don't think I'm ready for this, Georgie! I don't think I'm... 557 00:29:04,240 --> 00:29:06,534 How do you know unless you try, Mimi? 558 00:29:08,303 --> 00:29:10,008 Because if I'm not good enough 559 00:29:10,033 --> 00:29:12,904 and I don't do my job properly and someone ends up 560 00:29:13,802 --> 00:29:16,750 - dying, then... - Sometimes you've just gotta step up 561 00:29:16,769 --> 00:29:18,512 to the plate and face your fear. 562 00:29:19,538 --> 00:29:21,115 We all have. 563 00:29:22,954 --> 00:29:24,953 Why aren't you coming to Afghan? 564 00:29:47,696 --> 00:29:49,805 Finished my CMT training. 565 00:29:50,286 --> 00:29:53,067 Manning Desk are happy for me to stick a three-month tour in 566 00:29:53,118 --> 00:29:54,470 before I have to return. 567 00:29:54,541 --> 00:29:56,547 If you still want me... 568 00:30:00,578 --> 00:30:03,199 Like you say, there's a lot of new faces that need bedding in. 569 00:30:03,609 --> 00:30:05,064 I knew you wouldn't leave me 570 00:30:05,085 --> 00:30:07,094 to handle this freaks' roll call on my own. 571 00:30:07,095 --> 00:30:09,927 - Bit rude to freaks. - But, 572 00:30:10,052 --> 00:30:13,894 I want to be sure you want this. I'd understand if you couldn't face... 573 00:30:17,777 --> 00:30:19,687 We're going back to Afghan. 574 00:30:20,245 --> 00:30:22,290 Do we ever really leave? 575 00:30:22,469 --> 00:30:24,119 Colour Sergeant King. 576 00:30:24,494 --> 00:30:27,032 My word is my bond! You sang, 577 00:30:27,157 --> 00:30:29,480 I promised I would not take this trumpet on tour. 578 00:30:32,363 --> 00:30:33,677 Fortunately, though, 579 00:30:33,959 --> 00:30:35,702 I have more than one. 580 00:30:37,823 --> 00:30:39,400 Doof-doof! 581 00:30:46,430 --> 00:30:47,879 Welcome, guys. 582 00:30:47,880 --> 00:30:50,203 I hope you've all had a chance to look at your various, 583 00:30:50,229 --> 00:30:51,857 optoural briefing booklets, 584 00:30:51,902 --> 00:30:54,926 ostensibly a training, mentoring and security tour. 585 00:30:54,965 --> 00:30:56,708 Sergeant Georgie Lane. 586 00:30:56,833 --> 00:30:58,735 There are agencies from all over the globe 587 00:30:58,750 --> 00:31:00,222 - here in Kabul... - Mimi Saunders. 588 00:31:00,242 --> 00:31:02,616 ... and our job is to make sure no harm befalls them. 589 00:31:02,652 --> 00:31:06,321 - Oliver Hurst. Second Lieutenant. - This is not a contact operation. 590 00:31:06,378 --> 00:31:07,501 Private Stille. 591 00:31:07,562 --> 00:31:09,654 Some of you will be working as Guardian Angels... 592 00:31:09,710 --> 00:31:11,155 Airwolf. 593 00:31:11,801 --> 00:31:14,021 ... others working at Sandhurst in The Sand 594 00:31:14,083 --> 00:31:16,599 with me and Second Lieutenant Hurst. 595 00:31:16,724 --> 00:31:18,470 - Lieutenant. - Thank you, sir. 596 00:31:18,983 --> 00:31:20,081 All right, guys, 597 00:31:20,101 --> 00:31:22,967 into your sections for transportation to the operating bases. 598 00:31:23,146 --> 00:31:24,285 Let's go. 599 00:31:29,088 --> 00:31:30,514 We're soldiers, man. 600 00:31:30,560 --> 00:31:32,960 We're trained for contact. No contact, no point. 601 00:31:32,985 --> 00:31:35,487 If there were contact, you'd soon shit yourself, bro. 602 00:31:54,342 --> 00:31:56,501 I wonder if that's... Chicken Street. 603 00:31:56,752 --> 00:31:59,635 Prof... do you just, like, know everything? 604 00:31:59,636 --> 00:32:01,411 Yo. He might as well have just said, 605 00:32:01,437 --> 00:32:03,744 "Oh, I wonder if that's WongaWonga Street?" 606 00:32:03,789 --> 00:32:06,685 - We wouldn't know. - I would not want to walk down here on a dark night. 607 00:32:06,701 --> 00:32:09,259 - That is for sure. - Worse than Aldershot, eh? 608 00:32:09,274 --> 00:32:11,894 This might be our only glimpse outside the barracks, Mimi. 609 00:32:13,098 --> 00:32:15,015 Right, guys. Focus in. 610 00:32:15,897 --> 00:32:18,294 When we get to the base, shower and scoff. 611 00:32:18,545 --> 00:32:21,149 We'll then have 48 hours acclimatisation 612 00:32:21,159 --> 00:32:24,149 before we undertake the RSOI package receipt... 613 00:32:36,795 --> 00:32:39,946 ... acclimatisation is a boring couple of days 614 00:32:39,961 --> 00:32:43,057 where you rest so you're properly ready for the tour ahead, 615 00:32:43,083 --> 00:32:44,785 which will be exacting. 616 00:32:45,113 --> 00:32:47,440 I'm looking to you guys not to let me down. 617 00:32:47,814 --> 00:32:49,213 Medic. 618 00:32:52,042 --> 00:32:53,596 You OK, Lane? 619 00:32:55,482 --> 00:32:56,758 Medic. 620 00:32:57,594 --> 00:32:59,701 I need you in for a medical check in the morning 621 00:32:59,717 --> 00:33:01,691 with myself and Private Saunders. 622 00:33:01,716 --> 00:33:03,382 We'll put a list up. OK? 623 00:33:04,475 --> 00:33:08,213 There will also be a voluntary PT session every day... 624 00:33:08,239 --> 00:33:12,579 which you will all attend, you fucking sad mongrels. 625 00:33:12,620 --> 00:33:13,805 I thought we was supposed to be 626 00:33:13,810 --> 00:33:15,860 all touchy-feely in the army these days? 627 00:33:16,245 --> 00:33:18,096 The only thing that doesn't need exercising 628 00:33:18,132 --> 00:33:19,834 is your tongue, Throbber. 629 00:34:00,251 --> 00:34:01,847 Do we let them have real weapons? 630 00:34:01,886 --> 00:34:03,699 What are you talking about now, Throbber? 631 00:34:03,751 --> 00:34:06,795 - That's the Afghan army, mate. - That's a whole batch of new recruits. 632 00:34:07,096 --> 00:34:09,205 Look fit, healthy. 633 00:34:09,711 --> 00:34:11,294 They're ready for the task ahead. 634 00:34:11,307 --> 00:34:13,710 Yeah, sir, but what about all the green on blues? 635 00:34:13,730 --> 00:34:16,338 I'll tell you what'd stop that. Don't give them real guns. 636 00:34:16,351 --> 00:34:18,731 Right, and who do you think's out there contacting the enemy, Throbber? 637 00:34:18,742 --> 00:34:20,598 That's what I'm saying, yeah! It should be us 638 00:34:20,623 --> 00:34:23,504 out there engaging the enemy, not that rag-bag. 639 00:34:23,540 --> 00:34:25,032 They're not a rag-bag, Throbber. 640 00:34:25,157 --> 00:34:27,235 I think it's a good thing, don't you, sir? 641 00:34:27,513 --> 00:34:29,549 Despite their horrific losses, 642 00:34:29,626 --> 00:34:32,342 - locals are still willing to sign up. - Yeah. 643 00:34:32,554 --> 00:34:33,957 There's a will. 644 00:34:34,220 --> 00:34:36,820 - And where there's a will... there's a way. - Yeah, but, Kabul... 645 00:34:37,018 --> 00:34:38,489 It's a bit of a bubble, isn't it? 646 00:34:38,530 --> 00:34:40,458 Rome wasn't built in a day, Sergeant Lane. 647 00:34:40,583 --> 00:34:43,872 No, but it can be destroyed in one... 648 00:34:43,997 --> 00:34:45,599 ... and that's the problem. 649 00:34:56,556 --> 00:34:59,313 Come on. Please, please, please! 650 00:34:59,493 --> 00:35:02,226 - You all decent? - Wahey! 651 00:35:02,298 --> 00:35:04,364 You got wi-fi in the lumpy jumpers quarter? 652 00:35:04,380 --> 00:35:06,872 Apparently, there's wi-fi at different spots around the base. 653 00:35:06,887 --> 00:35:08,876 Just want to let Marie know we're all right. 654 00:35:08,897 --> 00:35:11,296 First tour as a married man, Fingers. How are you feeling? 655 00:35:11,347 --> 00:35:12,988 Yo, I miss her, bro. 656 00:35:14,332 --> 00:35:16,018 How comes you ain't married, Prof? 657 00:35:16,143 --> 00:35:17,459 How come YOU ain't married? 658 00:35:17,510 --> 00:35:20,392 I've got too many. They all want a slice of the Throbber. 659 00:35:20,622 --> 00:35:23,099 I would rather a slice of pizza, to be honest. 660 00:35:23,935 --> 00:35:27,399 - How many tog do you think these are? - Come on, Prof. You was a teacher. 661 00:35:27,420 --> 00:35:29,024 - They're all married. - Are they? 662 00:35:29,035 --> 00:35:30,951 Yeah. Every single last one of them, 663 00:35:30,992 --> 00:35:32,464 'cos they're all sad fuckers. 664 00:35:32,494 --> 00:35:33,797 I don't think all my teachers were married. 665 00:35:33,817 --> 00:35:36,268 - Did you used to be married, Prof? - What makes you think that? 666 00:35:36,278 --> 00:35:38,835 You look married. The glasses and that. 667 00:35:38,960 --> 00:35:42,251 My question is, was you married to a man or a woman? 668 00:35:42,297 --> 00:35:45,222 - Here, knock it off, Throbber. - Yeah. Leave it, cowboy. 669 00:35:45,347 --> 00:35:47,606 I used to have a gay drama teacher 670 00:35:47,781 --> 00:35:49,585 and he was married to the postman! 671 00:35:49,710 --> 00:35:52,548 I mean, a drama teacher I can understand, 672 00:35:52,564 --> 00:35:54,389 - but a postie! - My Lord! 673 00:35:54,471 --> 00:35:56,927 I thought I was thick but you take the biscuit, bro. 674 00:35:56,952 --> 00:35:59,116 So, am I right, or am I right? 675 00:35:59,241 --> 00:36:02,726 I believe that you, Prof, were married to a fella. 676 00:36:03,956 --> 00:36:05,085 No. 677 00:36:05,210 --> 00:36:07,315 I was married to a woman. 678 00:36:07,658 --> 00:36:09,199 But I'm not married any more. 679 00:36:09,617 --> 00:36:10,843 I knew it! 680 00:36:11,965 --> 00:36:13,324 You satisfied? 681 00:36:14,662 --> 00:36:15,805 Oh. 682 00:36:17,380 --> 00:36:20,472 - She didn't run away and leave you, did she? - Yeah. 683 00:36:20,845 --> 00:36:24,107 Yeah, if you must fucking know, she ran off with the Head of Geography. 684 00:36:28,765 --> 00:36:30,180 Head of Geography? 685 00:36:48,817 --> 00:36:50,976 So, here is the room... 686 00:36:51,299 --> 00:36:53,129 part of the medical facility, 687 00:36:53,139 --> 00:36:55,697 - so you are able to use... - So, we can commandeer it, yeah? 688 00:36:56,235 --> 00:36:58,727 Yeah, we need it for medical check-ups and assessments. 689 00:36:58,852 --> 00:37:00,454 Of course we'll get it cleaned. 690 00:37:00,500 --> 00:37:03,443 _ 691 00:37:04,079 --> 00:37:06,879 - So you guys are at Sandhurst In The Sand? - Yes, Sergeant. 692 00:37:07,078 --> 00:37:09,760 - The elite of the elite. - I'm Rabee. 693 00:37:09,885 --> 00:37:11,631 - This is Poya. - Hi. 694 00:37:12,041 --> 00:37:14,276 So are you medics working with the doctors out here? 695 00:37:14,287 --> 00:37:15,671 We keep them alive. 696 00:37:15,840 --> 00:37:17,689 We go out with them as their security... 697 00:37:17,690 --> 00:37:20,597 - Whenever they have to go into the community. - Or at the hospital. 698 00:37:20,722 --> 00:37:22,822 People want to kill the doctors? 699 00:37:24,263 --> 00:37:26,037 The situation is improving, though? 700 00:37:26,068 --> 00:37:27,875 I mean, now that the war's ended? 701 00:37:28,529 --> 00:37:30,375 The war hasn't ended for us... 702 00:37:30,500 --> 00:37:31,882 just for you. 703 00:37:36,880 --> 00:37:40,407 Hm. It's a great game but these pieces are a bit weird, 704 00:37:40,428 --> 00:37:43,006 so once you learn the moves, we can have a good game, 705 00:37:43,016 --> 00:37:44,206 - OK? - Right. So... 706 00:37:44,621 --> 00:37:47,312 The horse is the one that jumps over, yeah? 707 00:37:47,338 --> 00:37:50,198 Yeah. One up, three across. 708 00:37:51,378 --> 00:37:54,966 My dad was some sort of local champion when he was at school. 709 00:37:55,207 --> 00:37:57,242 What is wrong with you? You big gorilla! 710 00:37:57,924 --> 00:37:59,324 I'm not that good. 711 00:38:06,086 --> 00:38:09,119 - Have you acclimatised yet, Prof? - Oh, aye! 712 00:38:09,711 --> 00:38:10,995 What is that smell? 713 00:38:11,449 --> 00:38:13,635 That's Kahwa. Local green tea. 714 00:38:14,207 --> 00:38:16,345 Smells like my Doris's fake Jimmy Choos 715 00:38:16,360 --> 00:38:17,904 after she's worn them for a week. 716 00:38:17,919 --> 00:38:20,615 I think it smells quite nice, actually. 717 00:38:20,882 --> 00:38:21,892 Thank you. 718 00:38:22,184 --> 00:38:23,405 Do you know what? 719 00:38:23,574 --> 00:38:26,394 You're the first teacher that's ever been nice to me. 720 00:38:26,466 --> 00:38:27,911 I'm not a teacher. 721 00:38:28,331 --> 00:38:31,345 - I'm a soldier. - And History was always my favourite. 722 00:38:31,868 --> 00:38:34,673 Well, Afghanistan has an incredible history. 723 00:38:34,698 --> 00:38:37,431 Most of us couldn't even point to it on a map, mate. And we're in it. 724 00:38:37,503 --> 00:38:40,642 - I know I couldn't. - Why don't you give us a history lesson, Prof? 725 00:38:40,657 --> 00:38:42,457 Same reason I don't teach, 726 00:38:42,851 --> 00:38:44,438 because I don't want to stand up in front of a bunch 727 00:38:44,443 --> 00:38:45,930 of wazzocks like you lot. 728 00:38:47,078 --> 00:38:49,728 - Come on, Prof. - Yeah, we ain't a bunch of schoolkids... 729 00:38:50,554 --> 00:38:53,419 What's the fucking point of leaving a busted PlayStation? 730 00:38:54,896 --> 00:38:58,424 - ... Obviously apart from my man. - Of course, of course. 731 00:38:59,307 --> 00:39:01,378 Yeah, maybe you all do need a lesson. 732 00:39:01,853 --> 00:39:03,178 Wahey! 733 00:39:17,647 --> 00:39:19,502 You've got quite a full house, Prof. 734 00:39:19,627 --> 00:39:23,015 - I'm not sure why I agreed to do this. - I think it'll be great. 735 00:39:23,030 --> 00:39:24,358 I think you'll be great. 736 00:39:24,373 --> 00:39:26,819 Now I've got you, you ready? 737 00:39:26,999 --> 00:39:28,465 - Oh! - A bottle of water... 738 00:39:28,485 --> 00:39:29,516 Oh, thank you. 739 00:39:29,750 --> 00:39:32,641 - ... and I've done your shirt. - You kept it! 740 00:39:32,653 --> 00:39:34,675 I'd consigned this Paisley beaut to the bin. 741 00:39:34,706 --> 00:39:36,746 I'd forgotten I had it, so... 742 00:39:36,798 --> 00:39:38,959 I brought it back and... the blood came out. 743 00:39:39,228 --> 00:39:43,950 Well, I haven't seen it this well ironed since I liberated it from Topman. 744 00:39:44,560 --> 00:39:45,673 Good job. 745 00:39:46,880 --> 00:39:49,225 Prof. The natives are getting restless. 746 00:39:50,640 --> 00:39:52,194 Wish me luck. 747 00:40:01,597 --> 00:40:03,119 Good turnout, Mimi. 748 00:40:03,406 --> 00:40:05,776 I've been sent to round up any stragglers, 749 00:40:05,796 --> 00:40:07,124 but shall we just go in? 750 00:40:07,293 --> 00:40:09,698 No. We're going out. We're on a mission. 751 00:40:09,823 --> 00:40:11,528 What mission, Sergeant? 752 00:40:11,774 --> 00:40:14,174 We've got a pass to meet the administrator 753 00:40:14,251 --> 00:40:16,542 and hopefully some of the doctors at the local hospital. 754 00:40:16,667 --> 00:40:18,382 There's an armoured vehicle waiting for us. 755 00:40:18,438 --> 00:40:19,981 What? We're going out of the base? 756 00:40:20,038 --> 00:40:23,504 - I need you in full combats. No risks taken. - OK. 757 00:40:26,780 --> 00:40:28,348 So... 758 00:40:30,435 --> 00:40:33,086 it's the 1830s, right? 759 00:40:33,211 --> 00:40:35,455 And there was an empire to be proud of... 760 00:40:41,237 --> 00:40:43,078 And would you believe it, 761 00:40:43,150 --> 00:40:46,026 but the pesky Russians are kicking off. 762 00:40:48,984 --> 00:40:53,488 So us Brits... need to get the hell over from India to Kabul 763 00:40:53,503 --> 00:40:56,078 to sort these darn natives out... 764 00:40:57,832 --> 00:40:59,771 - He's a dark horse, ain't he? - We toppled the leader 765 00:40:59,795 --> 00:41:00,907 - Prof? - Yeah. 766 00:41:01,032 --> 00:41:03,593 - ... and put our own man at the top table... - Ready, guys? 767 00:41:03,646 --> 00:41:04,691 Let's move. 768 00:41:05,332 --> 00:41:06,879 ... Shujah Shah. 769 00:41:07,327 --> 00:41:09,116 - A bit like Monk. - What? 770 00:41:10,029 --> 00:41:11,434 Handsome and he knows it. 771 00:41:14,772 --> 00:41:17,783 The plan was to piss off, hotfoot back to India... 772 00:41:17,823 --> 00:41:21,845 but Shujah Shah was flaky and shaky, so... 773 00:41:21,970 --> 00:41:25,075 ... we stayed on to keep the situation under control. 774 00:41:25,361 --> 00:41:26,701 Big mistake. 775 00:41:26,720 --> 00:41:30,629 Like the Russians, they regarded us as another invading force, so 776 00:41:30,892 --> 00:41:34,449 these ingrate natives, they start giving it large 777 00:41:34,475 --> 00:41:36,595 and then, would you have it but the son 778 00:41:36,634 --> 00:41:40,255 of the toppled leader, Mohammed Akbah Khan, rocks up 779 00:41:40,306 --> 00:41:43,331 wanting bally power and for us to sling our hooks. 780 00:41:43,389 --> 00:41:47,092 So, in that time-honoured tradition, 781 00:41:47,412 --> 00:41:49,867 we decided on a tactical withdrawal. 782 00:41:49,992 --> 00:41:52,057 I wish your father had! 783 00:41:53,371 --> 00:41:55,525 - What? - I ain't here for fucking school! 784 00:41:55,550 --> 00:42:00,414 - It's a lorra shit-bollocks. - 16,000 people set out 785 00:42:00,484 --> 00:42:04,278 from Kabul to travel the 90 miles to Jalalabad. 786 00:42:05,784 --> 00:42:09,360 This was to be slaughter on an unprecedented scale. 787 00:42:12,025 --> 00:42:17,999 Generations of British blood has seeped into those mountains. 788 00:42:20,037 --> 00:42:23,446 On the 6th January 1842, 789 00:42:23,466 --> 00:42:26,278 the Kabul forces commenced their retreat 790 00:42:26,298 --> 00:42:30,233 through the dismal pass destined to be their grave. 791 00:42:35,085 --> 00:42:36,501 On the third day, 792 00:42:36,559 --> 00:42:39,995 they were attacked from all points by the mountaineers 793 00:42:40,320 --> 00:42:42,915 and a fearful slaughter ensued. 794 00:42:43,040 --> 00:42:44,777 - Fuck. - Shit! 795 00:42:44,808 --> 00:42:46,360 - Sorry! - What was the fuck was that, Kingy? 796 00:42:46,384 --> 00:42:48,899 Nothing's getting into this vehicle. 797 00:42:54,078 --> 00:42:57,164 The troops kept on, without food, 798 00:42:57,626 --> 00:43:00,409 mangled and cut to pieces, 799 00:43:00,455 --> 00:43:03,158 each one caring only for himself. 800 00:43:03,188 --> 00:43:05,233 All subordination had fled 801 00:43:05,479 --> 00:43:08,361 and the soldiers of the 44th English regiment, 802 00:43:08,391 --> 00:43:10,606 now known as the Royal Anglians, 803 00:43:10,616 --> 00:43:13,359 are reported to have knocked down their officers 804 00:43:13,360 --> 00:43:15,615 with the butts of their muskets. 805 00:43:17,097 --> 00:43:18,989 Absolute scenes... 806 00:43:19,594 --> 00:43:21,300 ... as you can imagine. 807 00:43:34,466 --> 00:43:36,619 On the 13th of January, 808 00:43:36,744 --> 00:43:40,309 just seven days after the retreat commenced, 809 00:43:40,386 --> 00:43:43,361 one man, bloody and torn, 810 00:43:43,407 --> 00:43:46,642 mounted on a miserable pony and pursued by horsemen, 811 00:43:46,662 --> 00:43:50,262 was seen riding furiously across the plains to Jalalabad. 812 00:43:50,785 --> 00:43:52,498 That was Dr Brydon, 813 00:43:53,621 --> 00:43:56,759 the sole person to tell the tale 814 00:43:57,374 --> 00:43:59,640 of the passage of Khord-Kabul. 815 00:44:02,106 --> 00:44:04,203 Location ahead, boss. 816 00:44:09,585 --> 00:44:11,600 You called home and spoke to your parents? 817 00:44:12,389 --> 00:44:14,548 Um, I'll call them at the weekend. 818 00:44:14,733 --> 00:44:16,404 I'm an independent woman now. 819 00:44:16,445 --> 00:44:19,490 Yeah, but you can still call... 820 00:44:19,503 --> 00:44:20,836 Fuck! 821 00:44:20,961 --> 00:44:22,456 Shit! 822 00:44:23,050 --> 00:44:24,450 Is everyone all right? 823 00:44:24,575 --> 00:44:26,008 We need to get out and help. 824 00:44:26,059 --> 00:44:27,802 Nobody's getting out. Understood? 825 00:44:27,874 --> 00:44:29,366 Call it in, boss. 826 00:44:30,714 --> 00:44:32,000 Boss! 827 00:44:33,497 --> 00:44:36,035 - Zero, this is spike two zero alpha... - Sure you're OK? 828 00:44:40,873 --> 00:44:42,355 Colour, 829 00:44:43,477 --> 00:44:45,123 the policeman wants us out to help. 830 00:44:45,467 --> 00:44:48,907 - Look, we stay put and await rescue. - We have to move out! 831 00:44:48,938 --> 00:44:52,030 - There could be a secondary. - All the other medical staff are risking it. 832 00:44:52,055 --> 00:44:53,999 - People need our help. - I say we move. 833 00:44:54,000 --> 00:44:55,695 There's children... It looks bad! 834 00:44:55,885 --> 00:44:57,654 You need to speak to the Brigadier 835 00:44:57,679 --> 00:45:00,340 - and await instructions! - Kingy, there are four medically trained 836 00:45:00,371 --> 00:45:02,560 - personnel in this car. - There could be a secondary! 837 00:45:02,596 --> 00:45:04,185 Just stay the fuck put! 838 00:45:05,195 --> 00:45:07,282 I don't need to speak to the Brigadier. 839 00:45:07,312 --> 00:45:10,628 - I'm the commanding officer here. - Have you all forgotten your training? 840 00:45:11,981 --> 00:45:13,551 Georgie! 841 00:45:24,523 --> 00:45:26,144 So, as you can hear, 842 00:45:27,170 --> 00:45:31,725 Afghanistan is a complicated beast. 843 00:45:34,324 --> 00:45:36,498 Get yourselves out! Release! 844 00:45:42,538 --> 00:45:44,358 Is everyone all right? 845 00:45:57,288 --> 00:45:58,739 - OK? - Yeah. 846 00:45:59,939 --> 00:46:01,554 OK, guys. Prepare to move! 847 00:46:09,526 --> 00:46:10,936 Georgie? 848 00:46:12,243 --> 00:46:13,852 Georgie. 849 00:46:15,062 --> 00:46:16,724 Georgie. 850 00:46:17,139 --> 00:46:20,554 Get... get... get your weapon. Grab your weapon. Come on. 851 00:46:20,739 --> 00:46:22,185 Let's go. 852 00:46:23,149 --> 00:46:24,410 - Is everyone all right? - Let's move. 853 00:46:24,426 --> 00:46:25,468 - You OK? - As quick as you can. 854 00:46:25,492 --> 00:46:26,877 - Are you OK? - Yeah, good. 855 00:46:26,892 --> 00:46:28,010 Good work, Saunders. 856 00:46:28,035 --> 00:46:29,916 Tourniquet and administer morphine, 857 00:46:29,917 --> 00:46:31,679 write on foreheads so the doctors know. 858 00:46:31,680 --> 00:46:33,024 Keep on looking at me, my love. 859 00:46:33,070 --> 00:46:35,290 - Keep looking at me. - Keep talking, Mimi. 860 00:46:35,415 --> 00:46:38,043 ... Looks so cute. Right, leg up for me? 861 00:46:38,168 --> 00:46:40,699 It is not worth it, mate. It is not worth it. 862 00:46:40,776 --> 00:46:43,124 OK. Now, we'll just put that there like this. 863 00:46:43,155 --> 00:46:44,467 Look at me. 864 00:46:44,492 --> 00:46:46,212 - I promise you, OK? - You're supposed to be getting the child 865 00:46:46,225 --> 00:46:48,684 into the hospital, not reading it a bedtime story! 866 00:46:48,704 --> 00:46:50,134 This is a hot zone, move yourself. 867 00:46:50,165 --> 00:46:52,051 The child would have bled out if it wasn't for her! 868 00:46:52,075 --> 00:46:54,125 Been here a day and already a goddamn expert. 869 00:46:54,250 --> 00:46:56,468 So fucking British. Let's move! 870 00:46:57,463 --> 00:46:59,364 Just focus on those with a pulse. 871 00:46:59,384 --> 00:47:01,327 I'll prepare the emergency room. 872 00:47:05,471 --> 00:47:06,773 As straight as you can. 873 00:47:06,799 --> 00:47:08,013 Is that your daughter? 874 00:47:08,213 --> 00:47:09,961 Keep that straight. 875 00:47:10,997 --> 00:47:12,559 Is that your daughter? 876 00:47:12,684 --> 00:47:13,981 Is that your daughter? She's OK. 877 00:47:14,000 --> 00:47:15,472 - She's all right. - What's happening, medic? 878 00:47:15,493 --> 00:47:18,436 Suspected hemothorax, erratic breathing, morphine administered. 879 00:47:21,661 --> 00:47:23,931 Sir, we need a bed out here, ASAP. 880 00:47:23,957 --> 00:47:25,244 She needs to get into hospital. 881 00:47:25,254 --> 00:47:27,581 Colour! We need a bed out here ASAP. 882 00:47:28,416 --> 00:47:29,959 I'm on you, then. 883 00:47:34,568 --> 00:47:36,388 Doctor! I need a doctor! 884 00:47:36,403 --> 00:47:38,475 Let's move her along to this cubicle. 885 00:47:39,660 --> 00:47:42,510 - All right, talk to me. - She's in cardiac arrest. 886 00:47:42,551 --> 00:47:46,022 Suspected hemothorax and I've given here 10 milligrams of morphine. 887 00:47:46,319 --> 00:47:49,334 OK, let's get a blood pressure cuff on her, please, and an IV. 888 00:47:51,785 --> 00:47:53,149 Come on. 889 00:47:58,374 --> 00:48:00,045 Pass me the paddles. 890 00:48:02,214 --> 00:48:03,665 Come on! Let's go, let's go, let's go. 891 00:48:05,120 --> 00:48:06,755 OK, charging... 892 00:48:07,140 --> 00:48:08,635 Everybody clear. 893 00:48:17,836 --> 00:48:19,328 Come on. 894 00:48:27,459 --> 00:48:29,504 All right, guys. I'm sorry. I've got to call this. 895 00:48:29,629 --> 00:48:31,114 Time of death... 896 00:48:31,181 --> 00:48:34,016 - 17:29. - Whoa, whoa. Should I try and... ? 897 00:48:34,141 --> 00:48:36,764 There's just too many other people that need our help right now. 898 00:48:50,195 --> 00:48:52,439 Were you the guys coming to see me from the British Army? 899 00:48:52,440 --> 00:48:55,115 Yeah, we're meeting the hospital administrator 900 00:48:55,131 --> 00:48:58,329 - about the vaccination programme. - Oh, that's me. Hospital administrator 901 00:48:58,360 --> 00:49:00,200 and doctor when needs must. 902 00:49:00,280 --> 00:49:02,766 Unfortunately, needs must a lot in my country. 903 00:49:03,157 --> 00:49:06,234 We have plenty for you to get on with here if you can stay and help. 904 00:49:11,245 --> 00:49:12,875 So where do we think this is? 905 00:49:12,922 --> 00:49:15,022 - Woodstock? - Woodstock? No. 906 00:49:15,611 --> 00:49:17,754 Isle of Wight rock festival? No. 907 00:49:17,879 --> 00:49:19,784 Some hippie trail somewhere... ? 908 00:49:20,368 --> 00:49:22,075 No, no. This, 909 00:49:22,157 --> 00:49:23,519 this is Kabul. 910 00:49:24,003 --> 00:49:27,705 God's own Afghanistan in 1969. 911 00:49:28,812 --> 00:49:32,380 And this hot chick here... 912 00:49:34,128 --> 00:49:35,517 ... is my grandmother. 913 00:49:35,548 --> 00:49:36,959 No way! 914 00:49:37,312 --> 00:49:39,019 And this... 915 00:49:39,768 --> 00:49:41,429 ... this bump here... 916 00:49:41,449 --> 00:49:43,290 is my mother, 917 00:49:44,684 --> 00:49:47,319 conceived in Afghan 918 00:49:48,483 --> 00:49:53,338 and just waiting to make her entrance into the world. 919 00:49:54,004 --> 00:49:56,936 Right, you wazzocks, that's class dismissed! 920 00:50:03,715 --> 00:50:06,181 Scrub yourselves up and get some food. 921 00:50:07,052 --> 00:50:10,472 I'd appreciate if you could do your After Action Reports this evening. 922 00:50:10,538 --> 00:50:13,405 - Sir. - You had the ECM in the vehicle, Mr Hurst? 923 00:50:13,415 --> 00:50:14,599 Yes, sir. 924 00:50:15,117 --> 00:50:16,952 Though local forces 925 00:50:17,077 --> 00:50:20,891 seemed to think the secondary device wasn't detonated by mobile. 926 00:50:23,316 --> 00:50:25,300 There was an Afghan Police Officer, sir, 927 00:50:25,315 --> 00:50:27,694 - trying to call us out of the vehicle... - Local forces intel 928 00:50:27,710 --> 00:50:29,359 indicating he had a vest... 929 00:50:29,586 --> 00:50:31,047 ... self-detonated, sir. 930 00:50:31,114 --> 00:50:34,816 You knew to remain in the vehicle until instructed to do otherwise? 931 00:50:36,010 --> 00:50:37,240 Indeed, sir. 932 00:50:48,227 --> 00:50:49,749 Colour... 933 00:50:51,918 --> 00:50:53,456 Thank you for not, 934 00:50:54,795 --> 00:50:56,717 you know, in there. 935 00:50:59,383 --> 00:51:00,639 You're the boss. 936 00:51:49,936 --> 00:51:51,515 You OK, Saunders? 937 00:51:52,592 --> 00:51:54,048 Yes, Sarge... 938 00:52:00,949 --> 00:52:03,005 Sorry, Sarge. I'm... 939 00:52:04,379 --> 00:52:06,298 think I'm just a bit knackered. 940 00:52:07,841 --> 00:52:09,789 It takes it out of you, doesn't it? 941 00:52:10,184 --> 00:52:11,568 Yeah. 942 00:52:13,788 --> 00:52:15,254 It's just like... 943 00:52:16,156 --> 00:52:17,399 so... 944 00:52:17,920 --> 00:52:19,971 ... matter of fact over here. 945 00:52:21,996 --> 00:52:23,680 Did you see all that blood on the ground? 946 00:52:25,990 --> 00:52:27,457 Have you called your parents? 947 00:52:28,057 --> 00:52:29,435 And say what? 948 00:52:30,117 --> 00:52:32,023 I mean, how am I meant to explain today to them? 949 00:52:32,049 --> 00:52:33,449 It'd just freak them out. 950 00:52:35,079 --> 00:52:37,243 You don't need to say anything. 951 00:52:37,751 --> 00:52:39,155 I don't. 952 00:52:40,581 --> 00:52:42,479 It's just nice to hear their voices, you know. 953 00:52:42,995 --> 00:52:45,005 And I bet they want to hear yours. 954 00:52:49,917 --> 00:52:51,189 Right, I'll call them. 955 00:52:51,440 --> 00:52:52,578 Promise. 956 00:52:53,239 --> 00:52:54,480 OK. 957 00:52:55,869 --> 00:52:57,294 Well done for today. 958 00:53:01,278 --> 00:53:03,199 Right, I'm going down for some scoff. 959 00:53:03,693 --> 00:53:06,774 OK. Well, I'll tell you what. I'll call them now and then 960 00:53:06,954 --> 00:53:08,738 I'll join you, if you don't mind. 961 00:53:08,863 --> 00:53:09,902 OK. 962 00:53:43,129 --> 00:53:44,609 Oh, here he is! 963 00:53:44,680 --> 00:53:46,559 Professor Stumble. 964 00:53:46,979 --> 00:53:49,315 So you're an Afghan, then, basically, Prof. 965 00:53:49,348 --> 00:53:51,279 How d'you work that one out, you big melon? 966 00:53:51,280 --> 00:53:53,758 All that stuff about you and your mum in Kabul. 967 00:53:53,762 --> 00:53:55,583 So if your nan went on holiday to Scotland, 968 00:53:55,604 --> 00:53:57,823 - that'd make you a jock, right? - I ain't a jock! 969 00:53:57,864 --> 00:53:59,955 No, you're worse than that. You're a brummie! 970 00:53:59,986 --> 00:54:02,339 I ain't a brummie either! I'm from Wolves! 971 00:54:02,370 --> 00:54:03,898 And you, you're a pile of sticks! 972 00:54:03,908 --> 00:54:05,482 Wouldn't last five minutes in Wolves. 973 00:54:05,493 --> 00:54:07,275 You ever been Manchester, bro? 974 00:54:08,159 --> 00:54:09,405 Wolves... 975 00:54:09,718 --> 00:54:12,419 - Manchester... - Shut up, you knob. 976 00:54:14,098 --> 00:54:16,437 - You all right, Sarge? - All right. 977 00:54:16,562 --> 00:54:17,984 Thank God you're all right! 978 00:54:18,025 --> 00:54:19,908 - Of course I am. - Wouldn't want to have to ring the wife 979 00:54:19,932 --> 00:54:22,213 - and tell her something had happened, would I? - Shut it. 980 00:54:25,044 --> 00:54:27,413 What were you saying about Manchester, you? 981 00:54:38,594 --> 00:54:39,712 What's happened? 982 00:54:39,738 --> 00:54:42,681 We just had an Intelligence briefing with Afghan Special Forces. 983 00:54:42,727 --> 00:54:44,941 Seems like the Taliban are targeting the hospital... 984 00:54:44,977 --> 00:54:46,218 And Dr Bahil. 985 00:54:46,238 --> 00:54:48,905 - Why? - She's standing in the elections. 986 00:54:49,030 --> 00:54:51,750 Her husband was killed last year. She's taking his place. 987 00:54:51,945 --> 00:54:54,518 They think it was the local warlord. 988 00:54:54,575 --> 00:54:55,959 Aatan Omar. 989 00:54:56,420 --> 00:54:58,062 This guy's our Ace of Hearts. 990 00:54:58,513 --> 00:55:00,830 He's responsible for most of the carnage in Kabul. 991 00:55:01,332 --> 00:55:03,978 He's been MI6's most wanted since 2012, 992 00:55:04,203 --> 00:55:08,089 when he blew up a UN convoy carrying medical supplies to Kandahar. 993 00:55:09,079 --> 00:55:10,304 Oh, my God. 994 00:55:10,356 --> 00:55:14,492 He was behind the Special Forces fatality in Kabul, sir. 995 00:55:14,518 --> 00:55:15,720 Elvis Harte? 996 00:55:19,967 --> 00:55:21,259 Yeah. 997 00:55:22,352 --> 00:55:24,213 We were on that mission, boss. 998 00:55:32,396 --> 00:55:33,585 Where's everyone? 999 00:55:34,851 --> 00:55:36,247 He says Omar's not here! 1000 00:55:36,308 --> 00:55:38,239 We are approximately nine fatalities. 1001 00:55:38,314 --> 00:55:39,965 Urgent evacuation required. 1002 00:55:43,754 --> 00:55:46,040 Suspected IED on the rooftop. 1003 00:55:50,542 --> 00:55:52,439 Elvis! 1004 00:55:53,049 --> 00:55:54,617 Elvis! 1005 00:56:27,208 --> 00:56:29,721 Double AP suicide bomb blast 1006 00:56:29,846 --> 00:56:31,551 outside the Kabul hospital. 1007 00:56:31,577 --> 00:56:34,278 Organised by local warlord Aatan Omar. 1008 00:56:34,403 --> 00:56:36,263 We need to be the ones out there protecting her, 1009 00:56:36,268 --> 00:56:38,267 not leaving it to the Afghan police. 1010 00:56:41,153 --> 00:56:44,070 If you're supposed to be helping, leave me to deal with the situation. 1011 00:56:44,096 --> 00:56:45,337 They think we're poisoning them. 1012 00:56:45,352 --> 00:56:47,131 This is all about Dr Bahil, is it? 1013 00:56:47,202 --> 00:56:49,279 Nothing to do with Omar and Captain Harte? 1014 00:56:49,360 --> 00:56:51,856 Our primary mission is to keep Dr Bahil safe. 1015 00:56:51,908 --> 00:56:54,901 Keep moving. Stay in the vehicle. 1016 00:56:59,239 --> 00:57:02,235 Monk, Kingy! On me! On me! 1017 00:57:03,489 --> 00:57:07,238 - Coming through! Coming through! - We're being ambushed. Move! Move! 1018 00:57:07,243 --> 00:57:09,524 - Synced and corrected by chamallow - - www.addic7ed.com -