1
00:00:04,156 --> 00:00:05,537
Oh, I'm finally here.

2
00:00:05,562 --> 00:00:06,628
Oh, this has been my dream

3
00:00:06,663 --> 00:00:08,196
ever since I saw "An American in Paris."

4
00:00:08,265 --> 00:00:09,430
For me, it was "Amélie."

5
00:00:09,533 --> 00:00:11,154
I made my mom give me that haircut.

6
00:00:11,179 --> 00:00:13,301
Happy Valentine's Day, mon cheri.

7
00:00:13,403 --> 00:00:14,836
Ah, gay Paree.

8
00:00:14,905 --> 00:00:16,538
See, I told you it would be Claire.

9
00:00:16,606 --> 00:00:18,439
- I had my money on Jay.
- Sorry, ladies,

10
00:00:18,508 --> 00:00:19,974
I'm in too good a mood.

11
00:00:20,043 --> 00:00:21,242
It's no big deal.

12
00:00:21,310 --> 00:00:23,144
I'm getting a lifetime achievement award

13
00:00:23,169 --> 00:00:26,504
at this year's Expo
Internationale du Closet.

14
00:00:26,726 --> 00:00:28,826
Why don't they translate the last word?

15
00:00:28,851 --> 00:00:31,029
I'm sure they have a word for closet.

16
00:00:31,054 --> 00:00:32,186
They're French.

17
00:00:32,288 --> 00:00:34,155
Maybe they went on strike
before they got to the end.

18
00:00:34,605 --> 00:00:38,976
Monsieur Pritchett,
welcome to the Crowne Plaza.

19
00:00:39,001 --> 00:00:40,434
I am Bernard Busse,

20
00:00:40,584 --> 00:00:43,328
president of the
International Closet Guild.

21
00:00:43,559 --> 00:00:45,226
Mwah!

22
00:00:46,000 --> 00:00:47,795
- Mwah!
- Oh, God. He made the sound.

23
00:00:47,820 --> 00:00:50,773
And this woman needs no introduction.

24
00:00:51,285 --> 00:00:52,957
You are just as beautiful

25
00:00:52,982 --> 00:00:54,948
as Jay described in his e-mail.

26
00:00:54,973 --> 00:00:57,374
It's a pleasure to meet you, Stella.

27
00:00:57,551 --> 00:00:59,607
Oh, no, no. This is my wife, Gloria.

28
00:00:59,632 --> 00:01:02,032
I-I put you in the e-mail,
but then it was too long.

29
00:01:02,134 --> 00:01:04,602
Well, I hope to see you both

30
00:01:04,627 --> 00:01:06,860
at the cocktail reception in an hour.

31
00:01:07,651 --> 00:01:08,739
À bientôt.

32
00:01:09,305 --> 00:01:10,307
Adiós.

33
00:01:10,309 --> 00:01:12,276
'Cause that's what we need.
A third language.

34
00:01:12,378 --> 00:01:14,078
We have an hour.
We should go sightseeing.

35
00:01:14,103 --> 00:01:15,713
- Maybe check out Notre Dame.
- No, thank you.

36
00:01:15,815 --> 00:01:18,349
I saw it back in the day,
before it was a shell of itself.

37
00:01:18,374 --> 00:01:20,073
Seeing it again would only depress me.

38
00:01:20,098 --> 00:01:21,497
Yeah, I know what you mean.

39
00:01:21,683 --> 00:01:23,183
That's why I can't shop at Sears.

40
00:01:23,208 --> 00:01:25,320
Manny, why don't you go and check us in

41
00:01:25,345 --> 00:01:27,134
since you disgraced this family

42
00:01:27,159 --> 00:01:29,562
by learning French instead of Spanish.

43
00:01:29,587 --> 00:01:31,553
And get that room that they promised me.

44
00:01:31,797 --> 00:01:33,964
Apparently some earl once slept there.

45
00:01:33,989 --> 00:01:35,322
We're so proud of you, Dad.

46
00:01:35,347 --> 00:01:37,981
Thanks. I only wish my old
man could be here to see this.

47
00:01:38,006 --> 00:01:39,039
You know, it's funny.

48
00:01:39,129 --> 00:01:41,210
He stormed the beaches of Normandy,

49
00:01:41,340 --> 00:01:42,806
and I'm getting a closet award.

50
00:01:42,909 --> 00:01:44,109
We keep topping each other.

51
00:01:44,134 --> 00:01:46,367
Who knows what Joe will do?

52
00:01:46,612 --> 00:01:48,178
Hey, w-what are you doing now?

53
00:01:48,203 --> 00:01:49,947
Well, you know, it's Valentine's Day,

54
00:01:50,016 --> 00:01:51,248
so I think I'm gonna enjoy

55
00:01:51,273 --> 00:01:53,807
the most romantic city in
the world with my husband.

56
00:01:55,570 --> 00:01:56,697
- Mm.
- Oh. Sorry.

57
00:01:56,722 --> 00:01:59,323
Phil can't come to Paris
because he has to work.

58
00:01:59,391 --> 00:02:02,526
It stinks, but I am still
gonna have so much fun

59
00:02:02,595 --> 00:02:03,860
visiting all my favorite places

60
00:02:03,929 --> 00:02:05,962
from the semester I
spent there in college.

61
00:02:05,981 --> 00:02:07,013
Real-estate emergency.

62
00:02:07,159 --> 00:02:09,059
Um, broker/client confidentiality

63
00:02:09,084 --> 00:02:10,517
fobids me from discussing it.

64
00:02:11,126 --> 00:02:13,420
The stuff I've seen...
you do not want to know.

65
00:02:13,609 --> 00:02:14,775
Correct.

66
00:02:14,800 --> 00:02:17,367
Look, if you want,
and you don't feel too awkward

67
00:02:17,392 --> 00:02:19,425
about being a third wheel, maybe...

68
00:02:19,477 --> 00:02:21,365
Ugh! Pity invite from Mitchell?

69
00:02:21,390 --> 00:02:23,657
How the tables have turned.

70
00:02:23,682 --> 00:02:24,687
No, merci.

71
00:02:24,716 --> 00:02:26,516
I'm gonna go find my favorite café,

72
00:02:26,585 --> 00:02:29,418
have a glass of wine, and try
not to be sad that I'm all alone.

73
00:02:29,420 --> 00:02:30,393
Okay, great. Have fun.

74
00:02:30,421 --> 00:02:32,021
Bye.

75
00:02:32,046 --> 00:02:34,453
Ooh-la-la.

76
00:02:41,929 --> 00:02:46,953
Modern Family S11E13
Paris

77
00:02:47,535 --> 00:02:49,495
You know, I heard the bread here

78
00:02:49,575 --> 00:02:51,236
is healthier than the
kind we have back home.

79
00:02:51,276 --> 00:02:52,875
Well, how is that possible?
Bread is bread.

80
00:02:52,900 --> 00:02:54,887
You would think,
but it's actually the way

81
00:02:54,912 --> 00:02:56,011
that the grain is, um...

82
00:02:56,036 --> 00:02:58,704
No, no, it's...
It's the way that the... the ovens...

83
00:02:58,850 --> 00:03:01,150
Okay, look, I'm gonna have a
lot of bread while we're here.

84
00:03:01,252 --> 00:03:02,506
I need it to be okay.

85
00:03:02,620 --> 00:03:04,186
I am so sorry.

86
00:03:04,365 --> 00:03:05,431
I think I'm jet-lagged.

87
00:03:05,456 --> 00:03:06,722
You know what? I might take a nap

88
00:03:06,747 --> 00:03:09,365
while you go out and... explore.

89
00:03:09,390 --> 00:03:10,370
Ooh! Oh.

90
00:03:10,472 --> 00:03:13,005
What was that? W-Why did your bag honk?

91
00:03:13,030 --> 00:03:14,968
I think that was a phone.
You know, that's how they ring here.

92
00:03:16,000 --> 00:03:18,067
Will somebody answer that? Hmm? Hmm?

93
00:03:18,167 --> 00:03:19,168
Don't be mad.

94
00:03:19,414 --> 00:03:20,646
Fizbo?

95
00:03:20,671 --> 00:03:22,896
My sweaters were too bulky to pack,

96
00:03:22,921 --> 00:03:24,150
but Fizbo made the cut?

97
00:03:24,175 --> 00:03:26,108
Oh, come on.
You know it's always been my dream to...

98
00:03:26,210 --> 00:03:28,778
to bring the magic of Fizbo
to the streets of Paris.

99
00:03:28,803 --> 00:03:29,945
You're not jet-lagged.

100
00:03:29,947 --> 00:03:32,615
You were gonna sneak
out and go clown around.

101
00:03:32,717 --> 00:03:34,617
You know that's not how we say it.
It's "clown about."

102
00:03:34,719 --> 00:03:35,972
I-I can't believe you lied to me.

103
00:03:35,997 --> 00:03:37,430
Well, I can't believe I had to.

104
00:03:37,455 --> 00:03:39,889
You know, most clowns have
spouses that are supportive.

105
00:03:39,914 --> 00:03:42,548
I'm not convinced
most clowns have spouses.

106
00:03:45,039 --> 00:03:46,939
Claire was about to meet

107
00:03:46,964 --> 00:03:49,999
Clive Bixby's French cousin, Claude.

108
00:03:50,178 --> 00:03:51,544
The plan was simple enough.

109
00:03:51,569 --> 00:03:53,402
All I did was create
a fake work emergency

110
00:03:53,427 --> 00:03:55,687
and wait for Claire
at her favorite café.

111
00:03:56,107 --> 00:03:59,542
Welcome to France.
What is the purpose of your visit?

112
00:03:59,722 --> 00:04:00,787
L'amour.

113
00:04:00,812 --> 00:04:02,298
Just answer the question, sir!

114
00:04:02,323 --> 00:04:03,623
Oh, I'm s-so sorry.

115
00:04:03,648 --> 00:04:05,014
Um, business...

116
00:04:05,209 --> 00:04:07,075
of l'amour.

117
00:04:16,165 --> 00:04:18,114
It helps to add a little sugar...

118
00:04:18,139 --> 00:04:19,238
Claude.

119
00:04:19,263 --> 00:04:20,830
Oh. Thank you, but th...

120
00:04:20,932 --> 00:04:22,498
this is, uh, not my real name.

121
00:04:22,523 --> 00:04:24,723
It's my romantic alter ego.

122
00:04:24,979 --> 00:04:26,612
I'm surprising my wife.

123
00:04:26,637 --> 00:04:27,803
Not bad.

124
00:04:27,905 --> 00:04:29,004
For an American.

125
00:04:29,106 --> 00:04:30,439
Oh, really? You can do better?

126
00:04:31,976 --> 00:04:35,878
Many years ago,
I met a woman in this very café.

127
00:04:35,980 --> 00:04:39,114
We had a brief but passionate affair,

128
00:04:39,294 --> 00:04:41,360
spending our days exploring Paris

129
00:04:41,385 --> 00:04:43,052
and our nights...

130
00:04:43,154 --> 00:04:44,887
exploring each other.

131
00:04:44,989 --> 00:04:46,222
Mm.

132
00:04:46,324 --> 00:04:47,723
Well, I-I once took a woman

133
00:04:47,748 --> 00:04:50,616
to both Disneyland and
Knott's Berry Farm.

134
00:04:50,795 --> 00:04:52,595
In the same day.

135
00:04:53,661 --> 00:04:55,671
On the day we parted...

136
00:04:56,334 --> 00:05:00,703
we promised to meet here
on this Valentine's Day

137
00:05:00,805 --> 00:05:02,538
to rekindle our love.

138
00:05:02,563 --> 00:05:03,720
Who knows?

139
00:05:04,175 --> 00:05:06,509
The chances of her even remembering...

140
00:05:06,733 --> 00:05:07,999
Oh, mon dieu.

141
00:05:09,162 --> 00:05:10,601
- Claire!
- Claire!

142
00:05:13,251 --> 00:05:14,383
Mmm.

143
00:05:14,751 --> 00:05:15,758
Bonjour.

144
00:05:15,861 --> 00:05:16,862
Hello.

145
00:05:17,632 --> 00:05:18,731
- Oh!
- Oh.

146
00:05:18,756 --> 00:05:20,163
I'm... I'm so sorry.

147
00:05:20,198 --> 00:05:22,501
"Sorry"?
H-How did you know I speak English?

148
00:05:22,526 --> 00:05:24,059
Have a nice visit.

149
00:05:27,268 --> 00:05:28,300
Excusez-moi.

150
00:05:29,085 --> 00:05:31,299
Um... ou se trouve, um...

151
00:05:31,324 --> 00:05:32,625
What are you looking for?

152
00:05:32,650 --> 00:05:34,202
Mona Lisa? McDonald's?

153
00:05:34,271 --> 00:05:35,336
Both are that way.

154
00:05:35,405 --> 00:05:38,606
Heads up,
the portions here are normal-size.

155
00:05:38,631 --> 00:05:41,195
H-How did you know I'm American?
Is my accent that bad?

156
00:05:43,980 --> 00:05:45,079
We're dressed the same.

157
00:05:45,104 --> 00:05:46,971
There's no reason to attack me.

158
00:05:54,751 --> 00:05:56,398
Hey. Where's Jay?

159
00:05:56,423 --> 00:05:57,789
I think he's nervous.

160
00:05:57,814 --> 00:06:00,445
He has changed his outfit three times.

161
00:06:00,470 --> 00:06:03,625
If this is what it's like to be
married to me, it's no picnic.

162
00:06:03,650 --> 00:06:06,242
We have a problem.
I have to show you something. Come here.

163
00:06:07,838 --> 00:06:09,520
Burl Saunders!

164
00:06:09,588 --> 00:06:11,532
Close. Earl Chambers.

165
00:06:11,557 --> 00:06:13,223
Jay isn't getting the award.

166
00:06:13,248 --> 00:06:15,536
He's accepting it on behalf
of his ex-partner, Earl.

167
00:06:15,561 --> 00:06:16,593
What?

168
00:06:16,829 --> 00:06:17,861
How?

169
00:06:17,997 --> 00:06:19,129
When the Expo called,

170
00:06:19,154 --> 00:06:21,588
Manny talked to them
because he speaks French.

171
00:06:21,744 --> 00:06:23,944
At least, he thought he did.

172
00:06:23,969 --> 00:06:26,256
In my defense,
the French word for "hotel room"

173
00:06:26,281 --> 00:06:27,681
sounds a lot like "chamber."

174
00:06:27,706 --> 00:06:28,905
Oh, oui, oui.

175
00:06:29,133 --> 00:06:31,600
They said you're putting
you up in the royal suite.

176
00:06:31,625 --> 00:06:33,304
It used to be some earl's chamber.

177
00:06:33,329 --> 00:06:36,421
That's closet people for you...
class all the way!

178
00:06:36,565 --> 00:06:38,531
Ah. He's here. What do we do?

179
00:06:38,600 --> 00:06:40,433
Nothing. Tell him the truth.

180
00:06:40,458 --> 00:06:42,765
Jay's a grown man. He can handle it.

181
00:06:42,838 --> 00:06:44,314
Okay, but if he goes for my throat,

182
00:06:44,339 --> 00:06:46,039
be ready to dial neuf, un, un.

183
00:06:46,194 --> 00:06:49,164
That language.
It's like a bunch of horses talking.

184
00:06:51,232 --> 00:06:53,932
Look at this place. Everybody's here.

185
00:06:54,165 --> 00:06:56,899
Heinrich Muler of Berlin Closet-stadt,

186
00:06:56,968 --> 00:07:00,403
Susan Sadaki from Tokyo
Closets and Canned Whale Meat.

187
00:07:00,471 --> 00:07:01,771
It's a regular who's who.

188
00:07:01,839 --> 00:07:03,873
Yeah, even when you say all their names.

189
00:07:03,942 --> 00:07:05,041
You know, I gotta tell you,

190
00:07:05,143 --> 00:07:07,198
this award couldn't have
come at a better time.

191
00:07:07,223 --> 00:07:09,923
With my closet company gone,
sometimes it feels like

192
00:07:10,025 --> 00:07:12,358
I don't have anything to
show for a lifetime of work,

193
00:07:12,383 --> 00:07:13,516
like it didn't matter.

194
00:07:13,618 --> 00:07:15,017
But now I know it did.

195
00:07:15,119 --> 00:07:16,919
Yes.

196
00:07:17,021 --> 00:07:17,914
Wait here.

197
00:07:17,939 --> 00:07:19,223
I'll be right back.

198
00:07:21,189 --> 00:07:24,393
New plan... I'm getting him out of here,
keeping him busy.

199
00:07:24,495 --> 00:07:26,683
You go and talk to the closet people.

200
00:07:26,708 --> 00:07:28,741
Make them give him an award.

201
00:07:28,766 --> 00:07:31,534
Any kind of award.
He won't know the difference.

202
00:07:31,636 --> 00:07:33,135
- How?
- Bribe them.

203
00:07:33,237 --> 00:07:35,214
Blackmail them. Seduce them.

204
00:07:35,239 --> 00:07:37,006
Have I taught you nothing?

205
00:07:39,495 --> 00:07:40,583
Phil?

206
00:07:40,608 --> 00:07:42,350
- Claire.
- Claire?

207
00:07:42,659 --> 00:07:45,410
Guy? Oh, my God.
What are you doing here?

208
00:07:45,479 --> 00:07:46,711
Claire, you know this Guy?

209
00:07:46,780 --> 00:07:49,114
Well, um... I used to.

210
00:07:50,221 --> 00:07:52,020
What are you both doing here?

211
00:07:52,085 --> 00:07:54,173
I came to surprise you
on Valentine's Day.

212
00:07:54,198 --> 00:07:56,049
You know the guy on the plane
with all the face bandages?

213
00:07:56,074 --> 00:07:57,966
- That was me.
- Oh.

214
00:07:57,991 --> 00:07:59,511
Claire, do you not remember

215
00:07:59,536 --> 00:08:01,603
asking me to meet you here in this café

216
00:08:01,628 --> 00:08:04,395
exactly 30 years after we parted?

217
00:08:04,414 --> 00:08:05,846
Vaguely.

218
00:08:05,871 --> 00:08:08,372
I-I-I was crazy to think
this could work out.

219
00:08:08,397 --> 00:08:12,039
Of course a woman as
magnificent as you is married.

220
00:08:13,726 --> 00:08:16,557
I don't want to interfere
with your day of romance.

221
00:08:16,670 --> 00:08:18,603
I will wander our old haunts alone

222
00:08:18,628 --> 00:08:20,861
and return to my hotel

223
00:08:20,886 --> 00:08:23,765
in the ghostly embrace of our memories.

224
00:08:24,625 --> 00:08:26,491
- Adieu, Claire.
- Okay, cool. Bye.

225
00:08:26,516 --> 00:08:28,215
- Yeah.
- Let's go.

226
00:08:30,189 --> 00:08:32,789
- Alright, big day. Lots of plans.
- Mm.

227
00:08:32,814 --> 00:08:35,678
First things first,
getting into character.

228
00:08:35,703 --> 00:08:36,704
Oh.

229
00:08:36,729 --> 00:08:38,562
Claude Bixby,

230
00:08:38,587 --> 00:08:41,108
mustard magnate with a flair for...

231
00:08:41,133 --> 00:08:42,543
Uh, Phil... Claude...

232
00:08:42,568 --> 00:08:44,668
I-I love that you're doing all of this,

233
00:08:44,737 --> 00:08:46,403
but doesn't some tiny part of you

234
00:08:46,428 --> 00:08:49,062
feel guilty for ditching Guy?

235
00:08:51,142 --> 00:08:54,344
I mean, he did wait for me for 30 years.

236
00:08:54,369 --> 00:08:56,069
We could invite him for a glass of wine.

237
00:08:57,182 --> 00:08:58,214
Fine.

238
00:08:58,239 --> 00:09:00,270
But I'm warning you,
if he gets out of line,

239
00:09:00,295 --> 00:09:01,928
- Claude knows karate.
- Mm.

240
00:09:01,953 --> 00:09:04,342
And Krav Maga.
He's Jewish on his mother's side.

241
00:09:04,367 --> 00:09:05,466
Ooh.

242
00:09:05,999 --> 00:09:08,071
Let's go this way, to the museum.

243
00:09:08,096 --> 00:09:10,927
Are you sure? I think they're
expecting me back inside.

244
00:09:11,040 --> 00:09:12,205
Make them wait.

245
00:09:12,230 --> 00:09:15,965
Why do you think the brides
arrive after everyone else?

246
00:09:15,967 --> 00:09:17,032
You're the bride.

247
00:09:17,035 --> 00:09:18,200
Yeah, I'm the bride.

248
00:09:18,269 --> 00:09:19,568
- Alright, let's...
- No, no, no.

249
00:09:19,637 --> 00:09:20,736
You know what? It's this side.

250
00:09:20,838 --> 00:09:22,071
- So, tomorrow...
- No, no!

251
00:09:22,140 --> 00:09:24,695
You know what? I'm sorry. It's this way.

252
00:09:25,098 --> 00:09:27,243
- Are you kidding me?!
- What?!

253
00:09:27,420 --> 00:09:29,687
How beautiful!

254
00:09:34,085 --> 00:09:35,217
Bonjour.

255
00:09:35,546 --> 00:09:36,846
B-Bonjour.

256
00:09:38,155 --> 00:09:39,492
Bonjour.

257
00:09:40,157 --> 00:09:41,924
Hunh-hunh.

258
00:09:42,026 --> 00:09:43,625
Oh.

259
00:09:43,694 --> 00:09:44,760
Pardon. Excusez-moi.

260
00:09:44,862 --> 00:09:46,195
Hunh-hunh!

261
00:09:50,664 --> 00:09:51,875
- Bonjour.
- Ooh.

262
00:09:52,403 --> 00:09:54,273
- Une table pour un, monsieur?
- Uh, ehh.

263
00:10:00,277 --> 00:10:01,776
Oh, Claire, remember that time

264
00:10:01,845 --> 00:10:04,012
when we snuck into the
cellar of that wine bar?

265
00:10:04,184 --> 00:10:07,032
Oh, God, we were so crazy and so young!

266
00:10:07,085 --> 00:10:08,635
Not anymore.
What's that, Grandma?

267
00:10:08,660 --> 00:10:09,757
She's a grandma now.

268
00:10:10,064 --> 00:10:12,320
Oh! Well, there's nothing more beautiful

269
00:10:12,355 --> 00:10:14,422
than a life creating life,
which in turn...

270
00:10:14,447 --> 00:10:15,679
Creates more life.

271
00:10:16,392 --> 00:10:19,427
Well, uh...
Claire and I should get going.

272
00:10:19,495 --> 00:10:20,961
I was hoping to get up to Sacre Coeur

273
00:10:21,030 --> 00:10:22,329
to get a view of the whole city.

274
00:10:22,432 --> 00:10:23,531
No need.

275
00:10:23,599 --> 00:10:26,033
I have a rooftop garden
suite at The Peninsula.

276
00:10:26,102 --> 00:10:27,334
It's the best view in town.

277
00:10:27,403 --> 00:10:29,136
How perfect is this?

278
00:10:29,161 --> 00:10:31,476
Frustratingly!

279
00:10:32,406 --> 00:10:34,339
Alright. Here we go.

280
00:10:34,364 --> 00:10:36,257
Let's see here.

281
00:10:36,812 --> 00:10:37,911
Oh.

282
00:10:37,957 --> 00:10:39,223
Bonjour.

283
00:10:39,248 --> 00:10:41,548
In a few minutes, I'm going
to be performing in the square.

284
00:10:41,617 --> 00:10:44,051
Je m'appelle Fizbo.

285
00:10:46,866 --> 00:10:48,499
Lui, c'est Fizbeau.

286
00:10:48,827 --> 00:10:50,727
- What?
- He is Fizbeau!

287
00:10:50,752 --> 00:10:52,413
Fizbeau, okay?

288
00:11:01,436 --> 00:11:04,470
Guy, this suite is so beautiful.

289
00:11:04,539 --> 00:11:06,326
I think the last time we were in Paris,

290
00:11:06,351 --> 00:11:08,318
we had a franc between the two of us.

291
00:11:08,343 --> 00:11:10,577
Oh, God! Who's Frank?

292
00:11:10,645 --> 00:11:12,812
I've been lucky in business,

293
00:11:13,083 --> 00:11:14,649
less so in love.

294
00:11:15,116 --> 00:11:17,616
I guess it's turned
me into a workaholic.

295
00:11:17,641 --> 00:11:20,984
I must be in the office
10, 12 hours a week.

296
00:11:21,656 --> 00:11:23,122
Shall we have some champagne?

297
00:11:23,224 --> 00:11:24,256
Uh, no, thank you.

298
00:11:24,325 --> 00:11:25,858
I'm not really in the
mood for champagne.

299
00:11:25,883 --> 00:11:28,195
Lucky for us,
because there are only two glasses.

300
00:11:29,523 --> 00:11:31,997
- Ah.
- Allow me to make a toast.

301
00:11:33,600 --> 00:11:34,766
- To Phil.
- Aw.

302
00:11:34,835 --> 00:11:36,601
For allowing me to spend a bit more time

303
00:11:36,626 --> 00:11:38,425
with the most generous
lover I've ever...

304
00:11:38,450 --> 00:11:40,601
Okay! I see what you're doing here.

305
00:11:40,626 --> 00:11:43,652
The champagne, the hotel suite,
that carousel ride.

306
00:11:43,677 --> 00:11:46,678
You two stopped laughing
every time I circled around.

307
00:11:46,978 --> 00:11:49,265
I'm sorry, buddy,
but it's not gonna happen.

308
00:11:49,848 --> 00:11:52,043
Phil's right. I'm a married woman.

309
00:11:52,068 --> 00:11:54,265
There will be no romance on this trip.

310
00:11:54,290 --> 00:11:56,484
I'm sorry. I've been a fool.

311
00:11:56,509 --> 00:11:59,744
I guess I let myself indulge in
a fantasy more than I should.

312
00:11:59,876 --> 00:12:04,023
Please, let us all pretend this...

313
00:12:04,161 --> 00:12:05,394
never happened.

314
00:12:05,441 --> 00:12:06,607
Wait.

315
00:12:06,840 --> 00:12:08,706
Was that Poulanc's misdirect?

316
00:12:08,793 --> 00:12:10,259
Indeed.

317
00:12:10,486 --> 00:12:11,385
Oh.

318
00:12:11,454 --> 00:12:12,887
A fellow prestidigitator?

319
00:12:12,956 --> 00:12:13,965
Yes!

320
00:12:14,820 --> 00:12:15,957
Put her there.

321
00:12:17,347 --> 00:12:18,546
Your watch, sir?

322
00:12:18,571 --> 00:12:19,904
- Looking for this?
- What?!

323
00:12:19,929 --> 00:12:21,028
Oh, no way!

324
00:12:21,639 --> 00:12:22,763
We should bounce.

325
00:12:22,815 --> 00:12:24,990
Tell me you're going to
visit Le Musée des Magiciens

326
00:12:25,015 --> 00:12:25,803
while you're here.

327
00:12:25,828 --> 00:12:26,727
- Ohh.
- The Museum of Magicians?

328
00:12:26,752 --> 00:12:28,029
I'm dying to go, but they're closed

329
00:12:28,054 --> 00:12:29,286
Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays...

330
00:12:29,311 --> 00:12:30,972
and Mondays and Wednesdays.

331
00:12:30,997 --> 00:12:32,635
Not if you know the owner.

332
00:12:32,758 --> 00:12:34,224
I can get us a private tour.

333
00:12:34,293 --> 00:12:36,293
Sweet! Claire, what do you say?

334
00:12:36,295 --> 00:12:37,661
We can pretend to saw you in half.

335
00:12:37,686 --> 00:12:38,906
Or just do it.

336
00:12:41,085 --> 00:12:42,686
Hello. Hi. Hi. Excuse me.

337
00:12:42,711 --> 00:12:43,911
Why are you dressed like that?

338
00:12:43,936 --> 00:12:45,085
Imposteur!

339
00:12:45,110 --> 00:12:46,536
Tu es un imposteur!

340
00:12:46,638 --> 00:12:48,305
You're... You're the imposteur...

341
00:12:48,373 --> 00:12:50,207
if that word means
what I think it means.

342
00:12:50,309 --> 00:12:51,334
He'd stolen Fizbo.

343
00:12:51,343 --> 00:12:52,676
The whimsically mismatched plaids,

344
00:12:52,745 --> 00:12:54,177
my trademark bold splash of pink,

345
00:12:54,202 --> 00:12:55,435
my blue lip!

346
00:12:55,797 --> 00:12:58,331
He'd clearly seen one of
my online clown tutorials!

347
00:12:58,425 --> 00:13:00,109
Hey, guys. Fizbo again.

348
00:13:00,134 --> 00:13:02,446
Just remember when you're
applying your rouge to go easy.

349
00:13:02,471 --> 00:13:04,343
You're an Auguste clown, not a tramp.

350
00:13:05,117 --> 00:13:06,752
You know what? Give me the jacket.

351
00:13:06,777 --> 00:13:07,807
Oh! I...

352
00:13:07,809 --> 00:13:09,245
I should've seen that coming.

353
00:13:09,280 --> 00:13:10,744
Donne moi ce mouchoir!

354
00:13:14,563 --> 00:13:16,832
- Touché, monsieur!
- You know what? Give me my wig.

355
00:13:17,783 --> 00:13:19,049
And that's when it hit me.

356
00:13:19,237 --> 00:13:20,365
Ooh!

357
00:13:21,272 --> 00:13:22,515
"The Clowns of Europe."

358
00:13:22,540 --> 00:13:24,539
I got this when I was a teenager.

359
00:13:24,662 --> 00:13:26,662
It was my "Sergeant Pepper's."

360
00:13:26,786 --> 00:13:29,119
Clown after clown pushing the envelope,

361
00:13:29,144 --> 00:13:30,914
including Fizbeau.

362
00:13:31,028 --> 00:13:33,046
B-E-A-U!

363
00:13:33,628 --> 00:13:35,594
Here, I thought I'd come up
with the idea, but he was right.

364
00:13:35,619 --> 00:13:37,419
I was the imposteur.

365
00:13:37,488 --> 00:13:38,587
If that's the word.

366
00:13:38,656 --> 00:13:40,166
For my high school language requirement,

367
00:13:40,191 --> 00:13:41,523
I took auction-calling.

368
00:13:45,762 --> 00:13:48,529
Isn't Napoleon's tomb spectacular?

369
00:13:48,682 --> 00:13:51,683
Just so you know, when I go,
I-I don't need all this.

370
00:13:53,620 --> 00:13:55,387
Look. That's Manny over there.

371
00:13:55,489 --> 00:13:56,621
No, no.

372
00:13:56,646 --> 00:13:58,046
I'll go get him.

373
00:14:01,772 --> 00:14:02,905
How did it go?

374
00:14:02,930 --> 00:14:04,729
Are they giving Jay an award?

375
00:14:04,754 --> 00:14:07,376
No. They said it would set
a very dangerous precedent.

376
00:14:07,401 --> 00:14:08,677
And in perfect English.

377
00:14:08,779 --> 00:14:10,112
Turns out this whole misunderstanding

378
00:14:10,137 --> 00:14:11,303
was completely avoidable.

379
00:14:11,328 --> 00:14:12,915
We need to figure out something.

380
00:14:12,940 --> 00:14:14,673
Jay can never find out

381
00:14:14,698 --> 00:14:17,465
that Earl got an award instead of him.

382
00:14:19,119 --> 00:14:20,128
Wow.

383
00:14:20,153 --> 00:14:21,286
Look at this place.

384
00:14:21,648 --> 00:14:23,648
The craftsmanship, the architecture.

385
00:14:23,673 --> 00:14:25,994
They say the domed ceiling
acts as a whisper chamber.

386
00:14:26,019 --> 00:14:28,019
What does "whisper chamber" mean?

387
00:14:28,121 --> 00:14:30,522
It means I heard
everything you just said.

388
00:14:30,702 --> 00:14:32,468
I have to turn my TV up to 40,

389
00:14:32,493 --> 00:14:34,025
but that was loud and clear!

390
00:14:39,519 --> 00:14:41,032
Ah.

391
00:14:41,101 --> 00:14:42,800
Hunh-hunh.

392
00:14:42,903 --> 00:14:43,912
Mm-hmm. Mm.

393
00:14:45,405 --> 00:14:46,604
- Ah.
- Merci.

394
00:14:46,706 --> 00:14:47,805
Oh.

395
00:14:47,962 --> 00:14:49,295
It was easy to fit in.

396
00:14:49,320 --> 00:14:52,154
All I had to do was look good
and have a lot of attitude.

397
00:14:52,256 --> 00:14:54,089
Paris was just like one big gay bar.

398
00:14:54,114 --> 00:14:55,960
- Et voilà .
- Ah.

399
00:14:59,071 --> 00:15:00,471
Votre pigeon, monsieur.

400
00:15:00,496 --> 00:15:01,796
"Pigeon"?

401
00:15:02,500 --> 00:15:03,700
Notre spécialité.

402
00:15:03,757 --> 00:15:04,708
- Ah.
- Bon appétit.

403
00:15:04,733 --> 00:15:05,742
Yah.

404
00:15:07,800 --> 00:15:09,366
Yaaaaah.

405
00:15:17,013 --> 00:15:18,212
No. I can't... I can't do it.

406
00:15:18,237 --> 00:15:19,670
I can't do it. I'm not French.

407
00:15:19,957 --> 00:15:21,490
And I-I'm not eating that.

408
00:15:21,936 --> 00:15:23,960
This scarf is driving me crazy!

409
00:15:25,389 --> 00:15:26,454
E-Excusez-moi...

410
00:15:26,479 --> 00:15:27,578
Cheeseburger, that way.

411
00:15:27,603 --> 00:15:28,772
Cool. Thanks, man!

412
00:15:30,793 --> 00:15:32,093
Wow.

413
00:15:32,118 --> 00:15:34,803
It's amazing how much magic
they got out of those old wands.

414
00:15:34,828 --> 00:15:37,054
Today, magicians have it so easy,
you know?

415
00:15:37,278 --> 00:15:38,444
Oh, yeah.

416
00:15:38,469 --> 00:15:41,505
Well, this basically feels
like a natural breaking point,

417
00:15:41,530 --> 00:15:42,662
for me, at least.

418
00:15:42,687 --> 00:15:45,161
Uh, Phil and I should
probably... you know?

419
00:15:45,180 --> 00:15:46,613
If you must, but our tickets

420
00:15:46,682 --> 00:15:49,003
also get us to Le Musée des Automates.

421
00:15:49,028 --> 00:15:51,195
They're like robots, but very primitive.

422
00:15:51,220 --> 00:15:52,853
They basically do nothing.

423
00:15:53,350 --> 00:15:56,381
Um, like the one I built
out of old mufflers?

424
00:15:56,406 --> 00:15:57,331
Can we, Claire?

425
00:15:57,356 --> 00:15:58,756
Oh, yes, can we, Claire?

426
00:15:59,698 --> 00:16:00,887
Excuse me.

427
00:16:01,506 --> 00:16:02,539
Hey, Gloria. What's up?

428
00:16:02,564 --> 00:16:03,796
I have a problem.

429
00:16:03,855 --> 00:16:04,857
Yeah, so do I.

430
00:16:04,866 --> 00:16:06,309
Apparently, I'm into nerds.

431
00:16:06,334 --> 00:16:07,567
It's Jay.

432
00:16:07,669 --> 00:16:09,357
He's not getting that award.

433
00:16:09,382 --> 00:16:10,603
What?!

434
00:16:10,671 --> 00:16:12,238
It was some kind of mistake,

435
00:16:12,263 --> 00:16:14,517
he found out, and now we can't find him.

436
00:16:14,542 --> 00:16:16,652
Oh, my God. Okay, I-I'll be right there.

437
00:16:16,677 --> 00:16:18,177
Are you sure it's okay?

438
00:16:18,324 --> 00:16:20,491
Uh, yeah, it's more than okay.

439
00:16:23,719 --> 00:16:25,251
Hey.

440
00:16:25,859 --> 00:16:26,991
Hey.

441
00:16:27,016 --> 00:16:28,316
H-How did you find me?

442
00:16:28,341 --> 00:16:30,241
Well, you're pretty easy to spot.

443
00:16:30,557 --> 00:16:32,826
Look, I-I'm sorry I overreacted, okay?

444
00:16:32,851 --> 00:16:35,904
If you want to be Fizbo, be Fizbo.

445
00:16:35,929 --> 00:16:37,662
I can never be Fizbo again.

446
00:16:37,731 --> 00:16:39,197
Fizbo is dead.

447
00:16:39,266 --> 00:16:40,465
Oh, you're a moving target.

448
00:16:40,534 --> 00:16:42,868
Look, I ran into the real Fizbo today,

449
00:16:43,047 --> 00:16:44,646
and he squirted me in
the face with water

450
00:16:44,671 --> 00:16:45,972
and hit me in the head with a book.

451
00:16:45,997 --> 00:16:47,006
What?!

452
00:16:47,224 --> 00:16:49,078
See, here, I thought I had created

453
00:16:49,103 --> 00:16:50,202
this special, unique thing,

454
00:16:50,227 --> 00:16:53,028
but I'm the one that's
been a fraud all this time!

455
00:16:53,941 --> 00:16:55,474
I'm throwing the suit in the river!

456
00:16:55,499 --> 00:16:56,698
Wait.

457
00:16:56,767 --> 00:16:59,031
That's littering.
There's a trash can right over here.

458
00:16:59,385 --> 00:17:00,618
Wait!

459
00:17:00,643 --> 00:17:02,342
Look, I-I gotta say, um...

460
00:17:02,489 --> 00:17:04,689
I don't...
I don't think you stole anything.

461
00:17:04,714 --> 00:17:05,846
What do you mean?

462
00:17:05,871 --> 00:17:08,002
Well, you said he hit you
in the head with a book.

463
00:17:08,027 --> 00:17:10,294
I mean,
I thought Fizbo was all about joy.

464
00:17:10,363 --> 00:17:12,597
He is. He's the embodiment
of childlike innocence.

465
00:17:12,697 --> 00:17:13,698
Exactly.

466
00:17:13,800 --> 00:17:16,354
Fizbo would never resort to violence.

467
00:17:16,379 --> 00:17:18,546
This guy doesn't sound like Fizbo to me.

468
00:17:18,571 --> 00:17:19,858
Well, he sure looked like him.

469
00:17:19,883 --> 00:17:22,450
Fizbo's more than just
a-a pair of big shoes

470
00:17:22,475 --> 00:17:25,118
and an... un-sexy jacket.

471
00:17:25,143 --> 00:17:26,342
He... He's an idea.

472
00:17:26,789 --> 00:17:28,256
If I've learned anything today,

473
00:17:28,281 --> 00:17:30,281
it's that clothes do not make the man...

474
00:17:30,500 --> 00:17:31,732
or the clown.

475
00:17:32,184 --> 00:17:34,750
And you are the real Fizbo.

476
00:17:35,703 --> 00:17:37,665
- You mean it?
- I know.

477
00:17:37,812 --> 00:17:38,944
Now, come on.

478
00:17:38,969 --> 00:17:41,226
Let's enjoy Paris. It's Valentine's Day.

479
00:17:41,995 --> 00:17:43,060
Mwah.

480
00:17:43,262 --> 00:17:44,267
Come on.

481
00:17:44,296 --> 00:17:46,196
Where did you get this crazy get-up?

482
00:17:46,221 --> 00:17:47,721
People are gonna stare.

483
00:17:49,833 --> 00:17:53,101
So... what was your favorite
part of the robot museum?

484
00:17:53,126 --> 00:17:54,325
Oh, man.

485
00:17:54,350 --> 00:17:55,875
I can't decide. You go first.

486
00:17:56,008 --> 00:17:57,207
No, you'll just copy me.

487
00:17:57,232 --> 00:17:58,867
I do that.

488
00:17:59,918 --> 00:18:02,579
Well, let's, uh,
let's just say it at the same time.

489
00:18:02,581 --> 00:18:03,580
On three.

490
00:18:03,582 --> 00:18:05,357
One, two, three.

491
00:18:05,382 --> 00:18:07,083
The mechanical monkey band.

492
00:18:07,152 --> 00:18:08,158
- Le jinx!
- Jinx!

493
00:18:08,890 --> 00:18:09,986
Double jinx.

494
00:18:11,056 --> 00:18:12,355
Ohhhh.

495
00:18:12,710 --> 00:18:13,776
Pour vous deux.

496
00:18:13,801 --> 00:18:16,523
O-Oh, my God. It's a painting!

497
00:18:16,548 --> 00:18:17,681
Of us!

498
00:18:17,973 --> 00:18:19,172
Merci.

499
00:18:19,197 --> 00:18:21,164
- Merci beaucoup.
- Merci.

500
00:18:21,937 --> 00:18:23,900
Is my... hand on yours?

501
00:18:23,925 --> 00:18:26,726
Yeah, but I-I don't...
think we did that.

502
00:18:28,957 --> 00:18:32,491
Well, um, I better...
better go find Claire.

503
00:18:32,560 --> 00:18:33,960
Of course. Yes.

504
00:18:34,028 --> 00:18:36,063
Okay. W-Weird. I guess this is goodbye.

505
00:18:36,088 --> 00:18:37,532
You... You should have this.

506
00:18:37,565 --> 00:18:38,965
Keep it.

507
00:18:39,110 --> 00:18:41,377
You'll give it to me in 30 years.

508
00:18:41,402 --> 00:18:42,890
In our café.

509
00:18:43,353 --> 00:18:44,470
I'll be there.

510
00:18:46,906 --> 00:18:49,208
Au revoir... Guy.

511
00:18:56,958 --> 00:18:58,042
Hey.

512
00:18:58,067 --> 00:18:59,633
I talked to Gloria.

513
00:18:59,796 --> 00:19:01,462
Thought I might find you here.

514
00:19:01,859 --> 00:19:04,542
It's a shame, Notre Dame.

515
00:19:05,626 --> 00:19:07,092
The fire.

516
00:19:07,194 --> 00:19:08,226
Yeah.

517
00:19:08,295 --> 00:19:10,662
It used to be so
impressive back in its day.

518
00:19:11,053 --> 00:19:13,057
It's still pretty impressive.

519
00:19:13,432 --> 00:19:15,877
Just a shell of its former self.

520
00:19:16,503 --> 00:19:18,503
Best days are behind it.

521
00:19:20,316 --> 00:19:22,249
It'll never be the same.

522
00:19:24,181 --> 00:19:27,983
It's taken some hits,
but it's still standing,

523
00:19:28,148 --> 00:19:30,463
and that's... that's grit.

524
00:19:30,498 --> 00:19:32,650
That's what inspires people.

525
00:19:32,752 --> 00:19:34,619
That's what inspires me.

526
00:19:35,555 --> 00:19:37,422
It's so embarrassing.

527
00:19:37,624 --> 00:19:39,344
The whole reason the family's here

528
00:19:39,369 --> 00:19:40,902
is to see me get that damn award.

529
00:19:40,927 --> 00:19:41,993
Oh, Dad!

530
00:19:42,061 --> 00:19:43,705
You and I are the only
ones in this family

531
00:19:43,730 --> 00:19:45,529
who care about closets.

532
00:19:45,598 --> 00:19:47,898
We're here because we love you.

533
00:19:48,434 --> 00:19:51,284
Come on. Let's go
get ready for that dinner.

534
00:19:56,917 --> 00:20:00,886
45 years is a long time
to spend in one industry,

535
00:20:00,911 --> 00:20:02,744
and I've accomplished a lot.

536
00:20:02,829 --> 00:20:04,885
The whisper hinge brought serenity

537
00:20:04,910 --> 00:20:06,309
to the American bedroom.

538
00:20:06,485 --> 00:20:10,487
My glow knobs revolutionized
getting dressed in the dark.

539
00:20:10,589 --> 00:20:12,156
And I led the charge

540
00:20:12,258 --> 00:20:15,392
to standardize the angle of shoe racks.

541
00:20:15,494 --> 00:20:19,229
But the thing that I'm...
that I'm proudest of...

542
00:20:19,331 --> 00:20:20,397
is my family.

543
00:20:21,721 --> 00:20:23,737
Thank you for being here.

544
00:20:24,370 --> 00:20:26,036
I love you all.

545
00:20:28,007 --> 00:20:30,107
You're my lifetime achievement award.

546
00:20:30,209 --> 00:20:32,496
- Oh! Thanks, Dad.
- That's so sweet.

547
00:20:32,521 --> 00:20:33,554
We love you, too.

548
00:20:33,579 --> 00:20:34,611
We love you, Jay.

549
00:20:34,613 --> 00:20:35,813
Claire Pritchett?

550
00:20:36,799 --> 00:20:38,282
Jean-Luc?!

551
00:20:40,429 --> 00:20:43,167
I had a lot of fun here in college.

552
00:20:43,325 --> 00:20:44,665
What are you doing here?

553
00:20:44,690 --> 00:20:46,323
Um... how are you?

554
00:21:22,796 --> 00:21:30,406
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