1
00:00:02,518 --> 00:00:04,168
Hmm. Some news
of our wedding.

2
00:00:04,169 --> 00:00:05,352
I have sent you all

3
00:00:05,353 --> 00:00:06,819
a "save the date" e-mail.

4
00:00:06,820 --> 00:00:08,453
Oh, exciting.
You guys picked a date?

5
00:00:08,455 --> 00:00:10,722
Better.
I picked 80 dates.

6
00:00:10,724 --> 00:00:11,757
And I need you

7
00:00:11,759 --> 00:00:13,859
to save them all until
we narrow it down.

8
00:00:13,861 --> 00:00:16,528
I thought we agreed
on June 15.

9
00:00:16,530 --> 00:00:18,497
That's the day after Flag Day.

10
00:00:18,499 --> 00:00:20,599
Everyone'll be partied out.

11
00:00:21,902 --> 00:00:24,202
It's a date-- just pick one.

12
00:00:24,204 --> 00:00:26,772
It's not just a date-- it's a
textbook optimization problem.

13
00:00:26,774 --> 00:00:28,941
There is a perfect date--
just like there's

14
00:00:28,943 --> 00:00:31,543
a perfect room temperature
and a perfect dessert.

15
00:00:31,545 --> 00:00:33,378
Mm. There's no perfect dessert.

16
00:00:33,380 --> 00:00:35,013
Yellow cake
in the shape of a dinosaur

17
00:00:35,015 --> 00:00:36,982
with chocolate frosting,
a scoop of vanilla ice cream

18
00:00:36,984 --> 00:00:39,017
on the side, not touching.

19
00:00:39,019 --> 00:00:39,952
You'll see.

20
00:00:39,954 --> 00:00:42,254
You'll have it at our wedding.

21
00:00:42,990 --> 00:00:45,057
You wanna bet?

22
00:00:45,059 --> 00:00:46,058
You give me

23
00:00:46,060 --> 00:00:47,659
enough time,
I can do the same thing

24
00:00:47,661 --> 00:00:49,928
with a wedding date--
it needs to be on the weekend,

25
00:00:49,930 --> 00:00:51,763
uh, not near
any of your birthdays,

26
00:00:51,765 --> 00:00:53,165
or the weekend of Comic Con.

27
00:00:53,167 --> 00:00:54,967
Ooh, you could get
married at Comic Con.

28
00:00:54,969 --> 00:00:57,469
No!

29
00:00:57,471 --> 00:00:58,837
We just need
a weekend date

30
00:00:58,839 --> 00:01:00,439
that's completely
boring and uneventful.

31
00:01:00,441 --> 00:01:02,841
Too bad you didn't get
your ducks in a row,

32
00:01:02,843 --> 00:01:05,844
'cause tonight
would have been perfect.

33
00:01:06,157 --> 00:01:09,525
? Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ?

34
00:01:09,527 --> 00:01:12,895
? Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ?

35
00:01:12,897 --> 00:01:14,664
? The Earth began to cool ?

36
00:01:14,666 --> 00:01:17,300
? The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ?

37
00:01:17,302 --> 00:01:19,969
? We built the Wall ?
? We built the pyramids ?

38
00:01:19,971 --> 00:01:22,638
? Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ?

39
00:01:22,640 --> 00:01:24,540
? That all started
with a big bang ?

40
00:01:24,542 --> 00:01:25,498
? Bang! ?

41
00:01:25,499 --> 00:01:29,499
? The Big Bang Theory 11x03 ?
The Relaxation Integration

42
00:01:29,500 --> 00:01:36,400
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man

43
00:01:40,084 --> 00:01:42,484
Good morning.

44
00:01:42,486 --> 00:01:43,852
Good morning.

45
00:01:43,854 --> 00:01:47,189
I know today is Apple Jacks day,
but... we're all out.

46
00:01:47,191 --> 00:01:49,792
That's fine.
I'll have anything.

47
00:01:49,794 --> 00:01:51,560
Really?

48
00:01:51,562 --> 00:01:53,796
Yeah. You know...

49
00:01:53,798 --> 00:01:55,764
whatev.

50
00:01:56,600 --> 00:01:58,133
"Whatev"?

51
00:01:58,135 --> 00:02:00,102
I like this side of you.

52
00:02:00,104 --> 00:02:02,004
You know what I like?

53
00:02:02,006 --> 00:02:04,340
Smooth jazz.

54
00:02:19,957 --> 00:02:21,857
? Da, da, da-da... ?

55
00:02:21,859 --> 00:02:23,325
? Da, da-da-da ?

56
00:02:23,327 --> 00:02:25,928
? Da, da, da... ?

57
00:02:26,564 --> 00:02:27,897
Hey, just a reminder--

58
00:02:27,899 --> 00:02:29,114
I'm going out for
drinks after work.

59
00:02:29,138 --> 00:02:30,200
Oh. Great.

60
00:02:30,201 --> 00:02:32,902
Just a reminder--
you're pregnant.

61
00:02:32,904 --> 00:02:36,305
I'm not drinking,
just taking a new coworker out.

62
00:02:36,307 --> 00:02:39,609
Oh. Just a reminder--
you're married.

63
00:02:40,445 --> 00:02:42,245
Female coworker.

64
00:02:42,247 --> 00:02:44,614
She's new in town, and I want
to make her feel welcome.

65
00:02:44,616 --> 00:02:46,916
And let her know
the office is full of liars

66
00:02:46,918 --> 00:02:49,652
before everyone
tells her I'm mean.

67
00:02:49,654 --> 00:02:51,254
Is she single?

68
00:02:51,256 --> 00:02:53,756
I'm not setting her up with Raj.

69
00:02:53,758 --> 00:02:55,091
What about Stuart?
Are you listening?

70
00:02:55,093 --> 00:02:58,127
I want her to think
I'm not mean.

71
00:02:58,129 --> 00:02:59,962
Okay. Well,
it's just...

72
00:02:59,964 --> 00:03:02,031
we have two single friends.

73
00:03:02,033 --> 00:03:04,233
Howie, I just met this woman.

74
00:03:04,235 --> 00:03:06,969
Why don't I wait a little
and get to know her?

75
00:03:06,971 --> 00:03:09,205
Maybe I won't like her,
and then I'd be happy

76
00:03:09,207 --> 00:03:11,407
to ruin her life
with Stuart or Raj.

77
00:03:12,210 --> 00:03:14,744
That's all I ask.

78
00:03:17,515 --> 00:03:19,548
So, you guys lived
with Sheldon for a long time...

79
00:03:19,550 --> 00:03:22,151
Long time.
So very long.

80
00:03:23,221 --> 00:03:25,388
By the way, congratulations
again on your engagement.

81
00:03:25,390 --> 00:03:28,758
Yeah. You got a good one.

82
00:03:28,760 --> 00:03:30,393
Thanks. So, it's strange,

83
00:03:30,395 --> 00:03:32,862
Sheldon was talking
in his sleep last night,

84
00:03:32,864 --> 00:03:35,331
and he seemed like
a totally different person.

85
00:03:35,333 --> 00:03:37,400
He was relaxed and...

86
00:03:37,402 --> 00:03:39,535
loose and calm.

87
00:03:39,537 --> 00:03:41,537
Well, Sheldon's
a complicated man.

88
00:03:41,539 --> 00:03:43,072
He said "whatev."

89
00:03:43,074 --> 00:03:46,042
Give him a brain scan--
that might be a tumor.

90
00:03:46,044 --> 00:03:48,377
Well, I think
the wedding planning

91
00:03:48,379 --> 00:03:51,747
is really stressful for him, and
that can trigger sleep talking.

92
00:03:51,749 --> 00:03:53,616
Well, maybe this is a part
of Sheldon's personality

93
00:03:53,618 --> 00:03:55,017
he's been repressing.

94
00:03:55,019 --> 00:03:56,619
I mean, I think we
dream about things

95
00:03:56,621 --> 00:03:58,321
we wish we could
be in real life.

96
00:03:58,323 --> 00:04:00,089
Really? What do you dream about?

97
00:04:00,091 --> 00:04:03,392
Oh. Uh... being the
wife of Leonard.

98
00:04:03,394 --> 00:04:04,794
Mostly that.

99
00:04:06,698 --> 00:04:09,498
I choose to believe you.

100
00:04:09,500 --> 00:04:11,867
Well, as much as we've studied
the brain, there's still a lot

101
00:04:11,869 --> 00:04:13,469
we don't know about dreams
and their function.

102
00:04:13,471 --> 00:04:15,504
You know, even psychologists
are divided on it.

103
00:04:15,506 --> 00:04:17,840
Mm, it's true-- Freud
thought dreams were about sex,

104
00:04:17,842 --> 00:04:19,229
Adler thought they
were about dominance...

105
00:04:19,230 --> 00:04:20,007
Then again,

106
00:04:20,011 --> 00:04:23,813
mine are just about being
married to this little guy.

107
00:04:23,815 --> 00:04:27,116
Well, now it's
just edging into mockery.

108
00:04:29,554 --> 00:04:32,188
Well, moving to a new city
was a little scary,

109
00:04:32,190 --> 00:04:33,656
but the job seems great.

110
00:04:33,658 --> 00:04:35,124
Everyone's really nice.

111
00:04:35,126 --> 00:04:37,026
Oh, they are.
Super nice.

112
00:04:37,028 --> 00:04:39,261
I mean, only one them
took you out tonight--

113
00:04:39,263 --> 00:04:41,364
but it's not a competition.

114
00:04:41,366 --> 00:04:42,598
Thanks again.

115
00:04:42,600 --> 00:04:44,600
You know,
we could have gone somewhere

116
00:04:44,602 --> 00:04:46,702
more pregnancy-friendly.

117
00:04:46,704 --> 00:04:48,537
Oh, it's okay.
One of the great things

118
00:04:48,539 --> 00:04:50,706
about being pregnant
is drinking cranberry juice

119
00:04:50,708 --> 00:04:53,809
out of a wineglass
and watching people freak out.

120
00:04:53,811 --> 00:04:55,578
Bernie!

121
00:04:56,314 --> 00:04:58,014
Oh, damn.

122
00:04:59,150 --> 00:05:02,051
Hey! What are the odds?

123
00:05:02,053 --> 00:05:05,554
Yeah, seren-frickin'-dipity.

124
00:05:05,556 --> 00:05:06,689
Hello.

125
00:05:06,691 --> 00:05:08,491
- Rajesh.
- Stuart.

126
00:05:08,493 --> 00:05:09,325
Hi. Ruchi.

127
00:05:09,327 --> 00:05:11,327
Ruchi is
my coworker.

128
00:05:11,329 --> 00:05:14,230
But that was probably
in your briefing packet.

129
00:05:20,605 --> 00:05:21,937
Hi.

130
00:05:21,939 --> 00:05:23,239
Hello.

131
00:05:23,241 --> 00:05:24,573
What's wrong?

132
00:05:24,575 --> 00:05:27,109
Well, I found the
perfect wedding date.

133
00:05:27,111 --> 00:05:28,778
- That's terrific!
- No, it's not.

134
00:05:28,780 --> 00:05:32,782
It was May 19, 1996.

135
00:05:33,718 --> 00:05:35,384
We would have had
a lovely wedding.

136
00:05:35,386 --> 00:05:36,952
And our honeymoon
would have coincided

137
00:05:36,954 --> 00:05:40,589
with the first appearance
of the Hale-Bopp comet.

138
00:05:40,591 --> 00:05:41,991
Sheldon, you were 16.

139
00:05:41,993 --> 00:05:44,894
And in Texas-- no one
would have batted an eye.

140
00:05:44,896 --> 00:05:46,495
Oh, wait, it's no good.

141
00:05:46,497 --> 00:05:49,198
That's the day that Jon Pertwee,
the third Doctor Who, died.

142
00:05:49,200 --> 00:05:50,566
And it's in the past.

143
00:05:50,568 --> 00:05:53,002
Hey-hey, I said it's no
good-- just let it go.

144
00:05:53,004 --> 00:05:54,737
Sheldon...

145
00:05:54,739 --> 00:05:57,773
I appreciate you trying
to make this wedding perfect,

146
00:05:57,775 --> 00:06:00,076
but it's making
you miserable.

147
00:06:00,078 --> 00:06:02,278
No, the wedding isn't
making me miserable,

148
00:06:02,280 --> 00:06:03,446
the calendar is.

149
00:06:03,448 --> 00:06:05,815
Why can't there just be
one week each month

150
00:06:05,817 --> 00:06:08,417
for famous people to die?

151
00:06:08,419 --> 00:06:10,519
Well, they've already
arranged to die in threes--

152
00:06:10,521 --> 00:06:12,655
what more do you
want from them?

153
00:06:12,657 --> 00:06:16,125
This is so frustrating.
Why can't I find a perfect date?

154
00:06:16,127 --> 00:06:19,261
I found the perfect way to say
hi to cowboys.

155
00:06:20,832 --> 00:06:24,166
I'm just saying maybe there's
a part of you deep down that...

156
00:06:24,168 --> 00:06:26,735
just wants to relax
a little, you know?

157
00:06:26,737 --> 00:06:28,137
Kick back.

158
00:06:28,139 --> 00:06:30,639
Say, "Whatev."

159
00:06:30,641 --> 00:06:33,142
Whatev?

160
00:06:33,144 --> 00:06:35,644
I'm sorry, you're really not
gonna finish that word?

161
00:06:35,646 --> 00:06:38,013
I-I'm just trying
to make a point...

162
00:06:38,015 --> 00:06:39,482
Finish the word, Amy.

163
00:06:39,484 --> 00:06:41,784
Fine. Er.

164
00:06:42,787 --> 00:06:43,886
Er, er, er.

165
00:06:43,888 --> 00:06:44,954
Thank you.

166
00:06:44,956 --> 00:06:47,790
Only now you owe me
three more whatevs.

167
00:06:49,894 --> 00:06:52,094
Oh, you were born
in Trivandrum.

168
00:06:52,096 --> 00:06:55,064
Have you ever been
to the Kuthira Malika Palace?

169
00:06:55,066 --> 00:06:56,332
No, I haven't.

170
00:06:56,334 --> 00:06:59,034
Me, either.
What a small world.

171
00:07:00,171 --> 00:07:01,904
I've also never
been there.

172
00:07:01,906 --> 00:07:03,672
I've never been
lots of places.

173
00:07:03,674 --> 00:07:05,741
Go on, quiz me.

174
00:07:05,743 --> 00:07:08,277
I'm sorry, we're being rude
talking about India.

175
00:07:08,279 --> 00:07:10,045
Oh, yeah, you know,
if you and Bernadette

176
00:07:10,047 --> 00:07:12,181
want to talk about America,
that's cool with us.

177
00:07:12,183 --> 00:07:13,682
Here, let me get you started.

178
00:07:13,684 --> 00:07:16,752
Hamburgers. Am I right?

179
00:07:18,189 --> 00:07:19,922
So, what do you guys do?

180
00:07:19,924 --> 00:07:21,891
Well, I am an astrophysicist,

181
00:07:21,893 --> 00:07:25,561
so if you ever go out at night
and look up at the stars,

182
00:07:25,563 --> 00:07:27,329
that's kind of my office.

183
00:07:28,332 --> 00:07:31,433
He sells comic books
to children.

184
00:07:31,435 --> 00:07:32,868
Actually,

185
00:07:32,870 --> 00:07:35,237
I own my own store.
Uh, i-if you'd like

186
00:07:35,239 --> 00:07:37,973
to check it out sometime,
I'm running a new promotion--

187
00:07:37,975 --> 00:07:42,111
buy anything, get taken out
for a reasonably priced dinner.

188
00:07:42,113 --> 00:07:45,281
Yeah, yeah, Stuart's
struggling financially.

189
00:07:45,283 --> 00:07:46,882
But he doesn't let that
get him down.

190
00:07:46,884 --> 00:07:47,983
He believes in himself.

191
00:07:47,985 --> 00:07:50,152
Even though the whole world
has made it clear

192
00:07:50,154 --> 00:07:52,555
he should not.

193
00:07:54,192 --> 00:07:55,991
Thank you.

194
00:07:55,993 --> 00:07:58,194
A-And, you know, Raj,
I think it's great

195
00:07:58,196 --> 00:08:01,363
that you no longer live off your
parents like a spoiled child.

196
00:08:01,365 --> 00:08:03,866
You live over someone's
garage like a...

197
00:08:03,868 --> 00:08:05,734
failed adult.

198
00:08:06,504 --> 00:08:08,537
Yeah, well,
you live with her.

199
00:08:09,407 --> 00:08:10,606
Oh, it's not like that.

200
00:08:10,608 --> 00:08:12,741
He rents a room
from me and my husband.

201
00:08:12,743 --> 00:08:15,744
Who, by the way,
is no prize, either.

202
00:08:19,250 --> 00:08:21,283
Oh, I don't care.

203
00:08:21,285 --> 00:08:24,520
You know me--
I just go with the flow.

204
00:08:26,724 --> 00:08:29,358
Beach, public pool...

205
00:08:29,360 --> 00:08:32,294
They both sound awesome.

206
00:08:33,598 --> 00:08:36,432
On second thought, beach.

207
00:08:36,434 --> 00:08:39,201
I'd like to befriend a seagull.

208
00:08:40,037 --> 00:08:41,904
That is crazy.

209
00:08:41,906 --> 00:08:45,207
Yeah. Will you
e-mail that to me?

210
00:08:46,177 --> 00:08:47,810
Have you played
this for him?

211
00:08:47,812 --> 00:08:50,579
No. I'm worried he'll say
I violated his privacy.

212
00:08:50,581 --> 00:08:52,615
Listen how happy he sounds.

213
00:08:52,617 --> 00:08:54,717
I'm up for anything,

214
00:08:54,719 --> 00:08:57,720
as long as I'm with you.

215
00:08:58,789 --> 00:09:00,990
- What are you listening to?
- Nothing.

216
00:09:00,992 --> 00:09:03,192
Oh, come on,
I want to hear.

217
00:09:04,795 --> 00:09:07,363
We don't need GPS.

218
00:09:07,365 --> 00:09:10,666
Let's just see
where the road takes us.

219
00:09:11,502 --> 00:09:13,269
I see why you turned it off.

220
00:09:13,271 --> 00:09:15,271
That guy sounds like an idiot.

221
00:09:16,140 --> 00:09:17,640
Honey, that's you.

222
00:09:17,642 --> 00:09:20,809
Don't be silly.
My voice is deep and sonorous.

223
00:09:20,811 --> 00:09:23,579
Like a Caucasian
James Earl Jones.

224
00:09:25,049 --> 00:09:28,217
"Luke, I am your father." See?

225
00:09:28,219 --> 00:09:29,618
It is you.

226
00:09:29,620 --> 00:09:32,021
I recorded you
in your sleep.

227
00:09:32,023 --> 00:09:34,456
Oh, look-- a hitchhiker.

228
00:09:34,458 --> 00:09:38,661
I bet he has
some interesting stories.

229
00:09:38,663 --> 00:09:40,963
That's me?

230
00:09:40,965 --> 00:09:41,964
It's you.

231
00:09:41,966 --> 00:09:44,867
So you spied on me in my sleep?

232
00:09:44,869 --> 00:09:45,968
Sheldon, I'm sorry.

233
00:09:45,970 --> 00:09:47,503
You've been doing
this every night.

234
00:09:47,505 --> 00:09:50,005
I couldn't help but wonder
if it meant something.

235
00:09:50,007 --> 00:09:50,939
Well, it doesn't.

236
00:09:50,941 --> 00:09:52,541
Are you sure?

237
00:09:52,543 --> 00:09:55,477
I mean, the prefrontal cortex
regulates impulse control.

238
00:09:55,479 --> 00:09:56,779
So it's plausible

239
00:09:56,781 --> 00:09:58,914
that when we're asleep,
aspects of our personality

240
00:09:58,916 --> 00:10:00,783
that we repress might come out.

241
00:10:00,785 --> 00:10:04,620
Don't try to put science
lipstick on your New Age pig!

242
00:10:04,622 --> 00:10:06,288
And for the record,

243
00:10:06,290 --> 00:10:08,657
you make noises when you sleep,
and I've never accused you

244
00:10:08,659 --> 00:10:11,360
of repressing
your inner chainsaw.

245
00:10:14,398 --> 00:10:16,365
If you want me to object
at your wedding,

246
00:10:16,367 --> 00:10:18,467
just give me one of these.

247
00:10:28,983 --> 00:10:31,750
This picture of Galactus
eating a planet looks like

248
00:10:31,752 --> 00:10:34,486
my preggo wife
destroying a coffee cake.

249
00:10:36,857 --> 00:10:39,324
Oh, yeah, I see it.

250
00:10:39,326 --> 00:10:41,160
I'm just saying,
you should bow out.

251
00:10:41,162 --> 00:10:43,028
Why should I bow out?

252
00:10:43,030 --> 00:10:45,397
Uh, because we all know
how this is gonna end.

253
00:10:45,399 --> 00:10:48,867
That's what my doctor said,
too, but I'm still here.

254
00:10:51,105 --> 00:10:55,040
Okay, look, I think that
she and I have more in common.

255
00:10:55,042 --> 00:10:56,975
Because you're Indian?

256
00:10:56,977 --> 00:10:59,678
So just 'cause she's brown,
you get to date her?

257
00:10:59,680 --> 00:11:01,079
Yes!

258
00:11:01,081 --> 00:11:03,081
And the next time
we meet a woman

259
00:11:03,083 --> 00:11:05,684
who's pale and cadaver-like,
she's all yours.

260
00:11:06,887 --> 00:11:09,421
Howard,
Bernadette was there last night.

261
00:11:09,423 --> 00:11:11,356
Did she say anything
when she got home?

262
00:11:11,358 --> 00:11:14,326
Yeah, she said, "Why'd you tell
those idiots where I was?

263
00:11:14,328 --> 00:11:15,694
Thanks a lot."

264
00:11:15,696 --> 00:11:16,902
Okay, how about
we flip a coin?

265
00:11:16,926 --> 00:11:18,264
Look, hang on.

266
00:11:18,265 --> 00:11:20,599
Doesn't this girl get
a word in all of this?

267
00:11:20,601 --> 00:11:23,001
And isn't that word "no"?

268
00:11:23,003 --> 00:11:25,737
Ruchi said she wanted to
hang out with both of us.

269
00:11:25,739 --> 00:11:27,206
Why don't we
just do that?

270
00:11:27,208 --> 00:11:30,576
Oh, fine. Let's hang out
as friends and see what happens.

271
00:11:30,578 --> 00:11:33,278
Yeah, and if something grows out
of it, just worry about it then.

272
00:11:33,280 --> 00:11:35,113
Also what my doctor said.

273
00:11:38,686 --> 00:11:41,720
Hey, this isn't
your laundry night.

274
00:11:41,722 --> 00:11:44,490
I know. Laundry
on a Wednesday.

275
00:11:44,492 --> 00:11:46,592
It's the madness
my life has become.

276
00:11:48,162 --> 00:11:51,129
Why is this sleep-talking thing
bothering you anyway?

277
00:11:51,131 --> 00:11:52,297
It's simple.

278
00:11:52,299 --> 00:11:53,665
I don't like the idea

279
00:11:53,667 --> 00:11:56,468
that my mind might be keeping
an entire personality from me.

280
00:11:56,470 --> 00:11:59,238
Dr. Jekyll's other
personality was Mr. Hyde.

281
00:11:59,240 --> 00:12:01,073
Mr. Hyde.

282
00:12:01,075 --> 00:12:04,710
Didn't have
a postgraduate degree.

283
00:12:04,712 --> 00:12:06,612
Is it possible
that you're stressed

284
00:12:06,614 --> 00:12:08,981
because you're scared
about getting married?

285
00:12:08,983 --> 00:12:10,849
I mean, it is
a big change,

286
00:12:10,851 --> 00:12:12,718
and you're not good
with little changes.

287
00:12:12,720 --> 00:12:14,586
Well, that's nonsense.

288
00:12:14,588 --> 00:12:17,389
You name one little
change I was upset with.

289
00:12:17,391 --> 00:12:21,593
Uh, when they changed the green
Skittle from lime to apple.

290
00:12:21,595 --> 00:12:24,296
That is not the rainbow
I grew up tasting.

291
00:12:25,266 --> 00:12:26,999
All right, fine.
Let's start over.

292
00:12:27,001 --> 00:12:28,267
Is it possible

293
00:12:28,269 --> 00:12:30,602
that the sleep-talking
is a part of your brain

294
00:12:30,604 --> 00:12:32,304
that's telling you
everything's gonna be okay

295
00:12:32,306 --> 00:12:34,373
and you just need
to relax a little?

296
00:12:34,375 --> 00:12:39,011
So you're proposing that
the self is an illusion,

297
00:12:39,013 --> 00:12:41,947
and that we actually
have multiple centers

298
00:12:41,949 --> 00:12:45,250
of consciousness that are
communicating with one another?

299
00:12:46,954 --> 00:12:50,122
In laymen's terms, yeah.

300
00:12:50,124 --> 00:12:52,324
Huh. Interesting.

301
00:12:52,326 --> 00:12:54,960
So you don't believe
there's a Cartesian self

302
00:12:54,962 --> 00:12:57,496
that underlies the
flux of experience?

303
00:12:57,498 --> 00:13:00,132
Maybe in my twenties,
not anymore.

304
00:13:01,468 --> 00:13:05,037
Okay. Well, assuming
you're right,

305
00:13:05,039 --> 00:13:07,172
what would you suggest I do?

306
00:13:07,174 --> 00:13:09,141
Well, I would start
with something small,

307
00:13:09,143 --> 00:13:10,642
see if it makes
your life any better.

308
00:13:10,644 --> 00:13:13,979
Um, you can learn to meditate,
take a yoga class.

309
00:13:13,981 --> 00:13:18,150
Oh. You know, I have always
been intrigued by flip-flops.

310
00:13:20,154 --> 00:13:23,422
The official footwear of
the laid-back fellow.

311
00:13:23,424 --> 00:13:25,657
- Okay, sure.
- Of course if my feet

312
00:13:25,659 --> 00:13:28,327
are gonna be exposed, I'll need
to update my tetanus booster.

313
00:13:28,329 --> 00:13:30,596
Oh, yeah. Makes sense.
Yeah. And while I'm there,

314
00:13:30,598 --> 00:13:32,502
I may as well get a flu
shot and a mole check.

315
00:13:32,526 --> 00:13:34,067
Sure.

316
00:13:34,068 --> 00:13:36,201
You know, I've never
had a mole check.

317
00:13:36,203 --> 00:13:38,003
Ooh!

318
00:13:38,005 --> 00:13:39,905
Well, it's been
nice knowing you.

319
00:13:42,676 --> 00:13:44,209
Here you go.

320
00:13:44,211 --> 00:13:45,744
Thanks.

321
00:13:45,746 --> 00:13:48,347
It's too bad Stuart couldn't
make it. He seemed fun.

322
00:13:48,349 --> 00:13:51,249
Oh, yeah, he is.
I love him dearly, yeah.

323
00:13:51,251 --> 00:13:53,785
Not to say
that I don't worry about him.

324
00:13:53,787 --> 00:13:55,053
What's to worry about?

325
00:13:55,055 --> 00:13:57,089
You know what?

326
00:13:57,091 --> 00:13:58,991
I'm talking out of school.

327
00:14:00,394 --> 00:14:03,862
Speaking of which, he's allowed
to live near them now.

328
00:14:04,832 --> 00:14:06,832
Hey, guys.

329
00:14:06,834 --> 00:14:08,667
- Oh, great, Stuart. You're here.
- Yeah, Stuart.

330
00:14:08,669 --> 00:14:10,902
Yeah, I did... I didn't think
you were gonna make it.

331
00:14:10,904 --> 00:14:13,071
Mm. I believe that.

332
00:14:14,475 --> 00:14:16,875
Sorry, guys. It's work.
I've got to take it.

333
00:14:16,877 --> 00:14:17,396
Oh.

334
00:14:17,420 --> 00:14:19,078
I'm so glad you
made it, Stuart.

335
00:14:19,079 --> 00:14:22,080
Oh, yeah, so glad.

336
00:14:22,082 --> 00:14:24,216
I can't believe you
went behind my back!

337
00:14:24,218 --> 00:14:26,652
Which clearly means
I want this more!

338
00:14:26,654 --> 00:14:31,289
You want to play a game of
"who's more desperate" with me?

339
00:14:31,291 --> 00:14:34,559
'Cause you're in the
big leagues now, Bucko.

340
00:14:34,561 --> 00:14:36,662
L-Look, Ruchi and I
are really hitting it off.

341
00:14:36,664 --> 00:14:38,330
Please let me just
have this one!

342
00:14:38,332 --> 00:14:39,631
I'm not going anywhere.

343
00:14:39,633 --> 00:14:42,467
I'm like a fungus
you can't get rid of.

344
00:14:42,469 --> 00:14:44,036
Sorry.

345
00:14:44,038 --> 00:14:45,804
So what's
going on?

346
00:14:45,806 --> 00:14:47,673
Oh, you just missed
Stuart's funny story

347
00:14:47,675 --> 00:14:49,941
about the fungus
he can't get rid of.

348
00:14:49,943 --> 00:14:53,278
Raj didn't tell me
about tonight

349
00:14:53,280 --> 00:14:55,313
so he could be
alone with you.

350
00:14:55,315 --> 00:14:57,215
Really?

351
00:14:57,217 --> 00:14:58,583
That's a little weird.

352
00:14:58,585 --> 00:15:01,687
Just a little?
Because I can work with that.

353
00:15:01,689 --> 00:15:05,223
Look, guys, I'm not interested
in dating anyone right now.

354
00:15:05,225 --> 00:15:07,526
I'm just looking
to make some friends.

355
00:15:07,528 --> 00:15:09,227
Yeah, I totally understand.

356
00:15:09,229 --> 00:15:10,962
But if you were
gonna date someone,

357
00:15:10,964 --> 00:15:12,964
would it be me or Stuart?

358
00:15:12,966 --> 00:15:15,267
I think I'm gonna go.

359
00:15:15,269 --> 00:15:18,470
Uh, uh, uh,
uh, Ruchi, I'm sorry.

360
00:15:18,472 --> 00:15:21,339
If you still want to hang out
as friends, I'd like that.

361
00:15:21,341 --> 00:15:23,775
Thanks, Stuart.
I'd like that, too.

362
00:15:26,380 --> 00:15:29,848
And the fungus is
under the toenail.

363
00:15:43,530 --> 00:15:45,897
Hello.

364
00:15:45,899 --> 00:15:47,365
Hey.

365
00:15:48,902 --> 00:15:51,503
So, um, I, uh...

366
00:15:52,906 --> 00:15:55,340
I got flip-flops.

367
00:15:56,176 --> 00:15:58,376
Good for you.

368
00:15:58,378 --> 00:16:00,545
Oh, my God, what happened?!

369
00:16:00,547 --> 00:16:02,781
After I got
the flip-flops,

370
00:16:02,783 --> 00:16:06,618
I realized that the tops of
my feet were exposed, so, um,

371
00:16:06,620 --> 00:16:08,520
I-I put on some sunscreen,

372
00:16:08,522 --> 00:16:10,989
which caused my feet
to become slippery.

373
00:16:10,991 --> 00:16:13,692
And predictably,
one of them fell off

374
00:16:13,694 --> 00:16:15,794
and went down a sewer grate.

375
00:16:15,796 --> 00:16:18,563
Now, normally, I would
have walked away,

376
00:16:18,565 --> 00:16:22,667
but this is a new,
laid-back me, so,

377
00:16:22,669 --> 00:16:26,304
instead of getting upset, I
just reached down to grab it.

378
00:16:26,306 --> 00:16:29,808
That's when I touched
something furry...

379
00:16:31,812 --> 00:16:36,148
...which I'm telling myself
was a damp toupee.

380
00:16:37,484 --> 00:16:40,585
When the toupee
licked my hand...

381
00:16:44,191 --> 00:16:47,192
...I screamed and
hopped down the street

382
00:16:47,194 --> 00:16:49,261
on my remaining flip-flop.

383
00:16:49,263 --> 00:16:51,051
Can I just ask...?

384
00:16:51,075 --> 00:16:52,698
No, this is
a long story.

385
00:16:52,699 --> 00:16:55,934
Why don't we please save
your questions till the end?

386
00:16:55,936 --> 00:16:58,870
So, I-I finally
came upon a bus bench

387
00:16:58,872 --> 00:17:01,706
where I sat and removed
one of my shirts

388
00:17:01,708 --> 00:17:04,943
and, uh, fashioned it
into a makeshift shoe.

389
00:17:06,146 --> 00:17:07,712
Not a waterproof shoe.

390
00:17:07,714 --> 00:17:11,149
That is relevant to the
next part of my story.

391
00:17:11,151 --> 00:17:15,520
The ankle-deep puddle
of warm apple juice.

392
00:17:16,390 --> 00:17:18,924
Apple juice?

393
00:17:19,760 --> 00:17:22,427
Maybe, maybe not.

394
00:17:24,097 --> 00:17:27,933
I'm telling myself
a lot of things, Amy.

395
00:17:27,935 --> 00:17:31,636
What happened
to your other flip-flop?

396
00:17:31,638 --> 00:17:33,605
Oh, well, that involves

397
00:17:33,607 --> 00:17:38,577
what I am telling myself
was a... melted candy bar.

398
00:17:42,749 --> 00:17:44,916
Okay. I-I'm sorry.

399
00:17:44,918 --> 00:17:47,519
Is there anything
I can do to help?

400
00:17:47,521 --> 00:17:52,524
Yes. I want you to be
in charge of our wedding.

401
00:17:52,526 --> 00:17:54,426
Just you tell me
where and when,

402
00:17:54,428 --> 00:17:56,494
and I will show up
with a boutonniere

403
00:17:56,496 --> 00:17:58,864
and close-toed shoes and a...

404
00:17:58,866 --> 00:18:02,434
a Star Trek uniform
underneath my tuxedo.

405
00:18:04,204 --> 00:18:07,339
That last part is
non-negotiable.

406
00:18:07,341 --> 00:18:09,841
Are you sure
that's what you want?

407
00:18:09,843 --> 00:18:13,044
As sure as I'm about
to go bathe in Purell.

408
00:18:16,350 --> 00:18:18,583
I love you.
I love you, too.

409
00:18:19,887 --> 00:18:22,520
You know, ever since
I was a young girl,

410
00:18:22,522 --> 00:18:25,423
I-I've dreamed
of a June wedding,

411
00:18:25,425 --> 00:18:29,794
maybe on a cliff overlooking
the ocean at sunset.

412
00:18:31,265 --> 00:18:33,431
Sure.

413
00:18:35,669 --> 00:18:38,103
Sounds wonderful.

414
00:18:38,105 --> 00:18:42,007
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I'm going to go clean up.

415
00:18:46,380 --> 00:18:48,914
Outdoor wedding.

416
00:18:48,916 --> 00:18:51,249
I know what
I'll be using that cliff for.

417
00:19:02,556 --> 00:19:05,891
I call this meeting of the
Council of Sheldons to order.

418
00:19:05,893 --> 00:19:08,293
Let's take roll.

419
00:19:08,295 --> 00:19:10,429
Science Sheldon?

420
00:19:10,431 --> 00:19:13,298
Present.

421
00:19:13,300 --> 00:19:14,900
Texas Sheldon?

422
00:19:14,902 --> 00:19:16,301
Howdy.

423
00:19:18,272 --> 00:19:20,239
Fanboy Sheldon?

424
00:19:20,241 --> 00:19:21,907
Greetings.

425
00:19:23,410 --> 00:19:25,377
Germaphobe
Sheldon?

426
00:19:25,379 --> 00:19:28,313
Say it, don't spray it.

427
00:19:30,484 --> 00:19:32,751
Where's Jock Sheldon?

428
00:19:34,121 --> 00:19:36,154
Not the time, Humorous Sheldon!

429
00:19:37,558 --> 00:19:40,092
Okay, new business.

430
00:19:40,094 --> 00:19:44,229
Do we grant Laid-Back Sheldon
a seat on the council?

431
00:19:44,231 --> 00:19:46,798
Hey, whatever
you guys want.

432
00:19:48,035 --> 00:19:52,437
I'm just chillin'
like Bob Dylan.

433
00:19:52,439 --> 00:19:54,473
- Negative.
- Heck, no!

434
00:19:54,475 --> 00:19:57,175
I don't feel well.

435
00:20:00,094 --> 00:20:01,960
Can we kick him out, too?

436
00:20:04,139 --> 00:20:11,039
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man