1 00:00:01,380 --> 00:00:02,826 Hey, Rodriguez. Good news. 2 00:00:03,087 --> 00:00:04,586 I was going over the harassment policy. 3 00:00:04,587 --> 00:00:06,420 Turns out there's nothing in there about nerds. 4 00:00:06,422 --> 00:00:07,621 We can do whatever we want to them. 5 00:00:07,623 --> 00:00:09,089 Well, I'm not really dying 6 00:00:09,091 --> 00:00:10,824 to harass some nerds. 7 00:00:10,826 --> 00:00:13,661 Oh, no, neither am I. I'm just saying we have options. 8 00:00:14,630 --> 00:00:17,531 Oh, God, you've gotta be kidding me. 9 00:00:17,880 --> 00:00:19,585 Okay, don't look over now. I'm gonna need you 10 00:00:19,586 --> 00:00:21,385 to look over, but don't be obvious about it, okay? 11 00:00:21,387 --> 00:00:23,354 Don't look now. Look back at me. 12 00:00:23,356 --> 00:00:24,814 All right, okay. Ready? 13 00:00:24,815 --> 00:00:26,190 Look now. Wait, not now! 14 00:00:26,192 --> 00:00:27,792 Dina, what are you talking about? 15 00:00:27,794 --> 00:00:29,428 Okay, you know Colleen from the Bel-Ridge store? 16 00:00:29,429 --> 00:00:30,728 The one who sucks and is like if Satan 17 00:00:30,730 --> 00:00:33,197 and a turd had a baby? She just walked in. 18 00:00:33,688 --> 00:00:35,541 Mm-hmm, yeah. Um... 19 00:00:35,542 --> 00:00:39,196 But your little rivalry thing is just kind of fun 20 00:00:39,197 --> 00:00:40,883 and friendly competition, right? 21 00:00:40,950 --> 00:00:43,364 No, Amy. I hate her with the fire 22 00:00:43,365 --> 00:00:45,665 of a thousand suns. Frankly, I'd like her dead. 23 00:00:46,404 --> 00:00:49,472 - Oh. - Shh... she's coming this way. 24 00:00:49,474 --> 00:00:51,237 God, I wish I could dropkick her dumb head. 25 00:00:51,238 --> 00:00:54,873 Colleen, hi! 26 00:00:54,875 --> 00:00:57,956 Oh, my gosh, it's so good to see you. 27 00:00:58,197 --> 00:00:59,797 Vomit. 28 00:00:59,933 --> 00:01:02,667 I am so sorry to hear about Bel-Ridge closing. 29 00:01:02,883 --> 00:01:04,550 Ugh, who knows why these things happen? 30 00:01:04,551 --> 00:01:06,834 Thanks, Deener. I appreciate that. 31 00:01:06,835 --> 00:01:09,264 So whatcha doing here? You just pop in 32 00:01:09,265 --> 00:01:11,098 on your way to the unemployment office? 33 00:01:11,100 --> 00:01:13,433 Well, actually, uh... 34 00:01:13,435 --> 00:01:15,502 Fun surprise. 35 00:01:15,504 --> 00:01:19,706 Colleen has been transferred to here. 36 00:01:19,708 --> 00:01:23,686 That... is a fun surprise. 37 00:01:29,011 --> 00:01:31,845 Colleen Wisniewski! In my store. 38 00:01:31,847 --> 00:01:33,280 Why didn't you tell me? 39 00:01:33,295 --> 00:01:35,413 I thought maybe you'd overreact a little bit. 40 00:01:35,414 --> 00:01:37,841 Oh, I'm overreacting a lot. This will not stand! 41 00:01:37,842 --> 00:01:40,417 You have to fire her. She calls me "Deener," Amy. 42 00:01:40,908 --> 00:01:43,042 - Deener. - Look, my hands are tied. 43 00:01:43,044 --> 00:01:44,910 She's been with the company a long time. 44 00:01:44,912 --> 00:01:46,412 Corporate wanted to relocate her. 45 00:01:46,414 --> 00:01:48,587 Besides, we kind of had something to do with 46 00:01:48,588 --> 00:01:50,021 the closing of Bel-Ridge, 47 00:01:50,023 --> 00:01:51,856 so maybe we should just be cool with it. 48 00:01:51,858 --> 00:01:54,425 What and then just let Colleen be Colleen? 49 00:01:54,427 --> 00:01:55,761 I don't wanna be on that side of history. 50 00:01:55,762 --> 00:01:57,096 If you don't get her out of here, I will. 51 00:01:57,097 --> 00:02:00,298 No, Dina, no. You will not. 52 00:02:03,130 --> 00:02:05,397 Or I will be forced to write you up. 53 00:02:05,991 --> 00:02:08,934 - Really? - In front of Colleen. 54 00:02:10,029 --> 00:02:11,055 You wouldn't. 55 00:02:12,206 --> 00:02:14,240 - Try me. - What is this? 56 00:02:14,242 --> 00:02:17,042 Is this... is this you being firm? 57 00:02:19,509 --> 00:02:20,913 Oh, you're back. 58 00:02:21,305 --> 00:02:23,538 Well, I'm wearing your vest and I'm keeping it 59 00:02:23,540 --> 00:02:24,854 'cause it fits me better. 60 00:02:24,855 --> 00:02:27,622 No, I'm just visiting. I may not be able to work here, 61 00:02:27,624 --> 00:02:29,291 but they can't stop me from seeing my friends 62 00:02:29,293 --> 00:02:30,792 and using their employee discount. 63 00:02:30,794 --> 00:02:33,094 So you have to wear that thing all the time? 64 00:02:33,096 --> 00:02:34,796 It's the worst. 65 00:02:35,332 --> 00:02:37,119 I have to charge it every eight hours, 66 00:02:37,120 --> 00:02:39,234 and of course they had to put it on my cute ankle. 67 00:02:39,236 --> 00:02:40,818 My mom's ex-boyfriend Dustin 68 00:02:40,819 --> 00:02:42,714 had one of those, but he took it off. 69 00:02:42,715 --> 00:02:44,121 How? They're, like, indestructible. 70 00:02:44,122 --> 00:02:46,465 Well, he was 400 pounds when he got it, 71 00:02:46,466 --> 00:02:48,607 but then he got a parasite from a lake. 72 00:02:50,891 --> 00:02:53,158 Maybe something like this for our centerpieces? 73 00:02:53,160 --> 00:02:56,494 But with basil in it 'cause Jerry loves Italian food. 74 00:02:56,496 --> 00:02:58,429 I wish you were having a gay wedding. 75 00:02:58,431 --> 00:02:59,931 I've never been to a gay wedding. 76 00:02:59,933 --> 00:03:01,699 Oh, you should have a shrimp tower 77 00:03:01,701 --> 00:03:03,176 because I've heard at some weddings 78 00:03:03,177 --> 00:03:05,203 they don't have enough shrimp, and some... 79 00:03:05,205 --> 00:03:06,838 some people get upset. 80 00:03:06,840 --> 00:03:08,406 Okay, these are all great points, 81 00:03:08,408 --> 00:03:10,508 just not for a union meeting, 82 00:03:10,510 --> 00:03:12,043 which this was actually supposed to be. 83 00:03:12,045 --> 00:03:13,511 So have you guys set a date yet? 84 00:03:13,513 --> 00:03:15,446 Almost. It's either gonna be 85 00:03:15,448 --> 00:03:17,215 the anniversary of our first kiss 86 00:03:17,217 --> 00:03:19,384 or whatever the cheapest option is. 87 00:03:19,386 --> 00:03:22,453 You know, Sandra, you seem to have a lot going on right now 88 00:03:22,455 --> 00:03:25,557 and I'm wondering if maybe I should take the reins 89 00:03:25,559 --> 00:03:27,392 on this whole union thing for a little bit. 90 00:03:27,394 --> 00:03:28,696 Yes, thank you. 91 00:03:28,697 --> 00:03:30,677 I'm doing a lot of wedding planning this week 92 00:03:30,678 --> 00:03:32,975 and also I'm going through all the "Fast & Furious" movies, 93 00:03:32,976 --> 00:03:34,434 so I have a lot on my plate. 94 00:03:34,436 --> 00:03:35,935 Got it. Yeah. 95 00:03:35,937 --> 00:03:37,470 Here are the signed cards 96 00:03:37,472 --> 00:03:39,316 and, FYI, the warehouse guys took theirs back. 97 00:03:39,702 --> 00:03:40,807 Wait, what? Why? 98 00:03:40,809 --> 00:03:44,250 I don't know, but Rico has beautiful penmanship. 99 00:03:44,524 --> 00:03:46,808 He agreed to do all of my invitations. 100 00:03:55,515 --> 00:03:57,081 I guess I should've pushed back more when 101 00:03:57,083 --> 00:03:58,916 corporate made me hire her, but I just thought 102 00:03:58,918 --> 00:04:00,918 Dina hated her like, "I hate Mondays." 103 00:04:00,920 --> 00:04:02,987 But no, she wants to follow Monday home, 104 00:04:02,989 --> 00:04:04,755 blockade the door, and burn the house down 105 00:04:04,757 --> 00:04:06,390 with Monday still inside. 106 00:04:06,392 --> 00:04:08,659 Well, I mean I can see where Dina is coming from. 107 00:04:08,661 --> 00:04:10,895 Who wouldn't hate that person? 108 00:04:10,897 --> 00:04:12,696 Well, at least I put my foot down. 109 00:04:12,698 --> 00:04:15,399 Dina is not going to be messing with her. 110 00:04:15,401 --> 00:04:17,902 Hopefully. How was the union meeting? 111 00:04:17,904 --> 00:04:20,437 Well, uh, we learned that Sandra is walking 112 00:04:20,439 --> 00:04:22,173 down the aisle to "The Hamster Dance." 113 00:04:22,175 --> 00:04:24,508 Oh, and all the warehouse guys are out. 114 00:04:24,510 --> 00:04:26,510 Wait, what? How are we gonna get any 115 00:04:26,512 --> 00:04:29,180 of the other stores to commit if we can't get our own people? 116 00:04:29,182 --> 00:04:30,881 Don't worry, I'm on it. I'll... I'll talk to them, 117 00:04:30,883 --> 00:04:32,183 get 'em back on board. 118 00:04:32,524 --> 00:04:33,636 Oh. 119 00:04:33,719 --> 00:04:36,854 You know, I would never usually recommend this, 120 00:04:36,856 --> 00:04:39,056 but you should talk to Marcus. I don't know, 121 00:04:39,058 --> 00:04:40,691 for some reason they listen to him. 122 00:04:40,693 --> 00:04:42,059 I think it's 'cause he's tall. 123 00:04:42,061 --> 00:04:43,254 Is he tall? 124 00:04:43,629 --> 00:04:46,297 I guess I just never thought of us as tall... 125 00:04:46,785 --> 00:04:47,976 Aww. 126 00:04:50,803 --> 00:04:53,604 God, this sucks. 127 00:04:53,606 --> 00:04:55,393 I just feel so useless. 128 00:04:55,741 --> 00:04:57,875 And not like the way most people here are useless. 129 00:04:57,877 --> 00:05:00,211 I just mean, like, no purpose. 130 00:05:00,213 --> 00:05:02,446 Well, I could use your help with this quilt right now. 131 00:05:02,448 --> 00:05:04,148 I can't get it smooth. 132 00:05:04,150 --> 00:05:05,950 Okay, you can't grapple with it once it's down. 133 00:05:05,952 --> 00:05:07,952 You have to do the loft-and-fold. 134 00:05:07,954 --> 00:05:09,220 - What? - Yeah. 135 00:05:09,222 --> 00:05:10,955 Just loft... 136 00:05:13,926 --> 00:05:16,260 And then we fold this... 137 00:05:17,498 --> 00:05:20,831 Wow! Get this guy into my bedroom. 138 00:05:21,315 --> 00:05:23,221 - Thank you. - You bet. 139 00:05:24,451 --> 00:05:27,071 Aww, did you see his face when he helped you? 140 00:05:27,333 --> 00:05:29,166 Makes sense. He loves being better 141 00:05:29,168 --> 00:05:30,934 at stuff than people. 142 00:05:32,671 --> 00:05:34,371 Oh, crap. 143 00:05:34,373 --> 00:05:37,514 - My phone's in there. - Oh. 144 00:05:37,515 --> 00:05:40,226 I don't know, man. The guys got pretty spooked by the raid. 145 00:05:40,227 --> 00:05:42,093 Who knows what corporate would do if we unionize? 146 00:05:42,095 --> 00:05:45,430 Yeah, well, but we... we really need the numbers, and I... 147 00:05:46,109 --> 00:05:47,855 And I-I just thought maybe... 148 00:05:48,468 --> 00:05:50,768 maybe you could talk to them? 149 00:05:50,770 --> 00:05:52,904 If you're... if you're worried about what to say, 150 00:05:52,906 --> 00:05:55,440 we could go over some talking points together, you know. 151 00:05:55,442 --> 00:05:57,775 Hold up... together? 152 00:05:57,777 --> 00:05:59,577 As in, you and me? 153 00:05:59,579 --> 00:06:01,980 Yeah, just, you know, just quickly to go over what to say. 154 00:06:01,982 --> 00:06:03,248 Right, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 155 00:06:03,250 --> 00:06:04,649 We hang out, chopping it up, 156 00:06:04,651 --> 00:06:07,151 bro by bro. Then I go back in, 157 00:06:07,153 --> 00:06:10,255 get the guys back on board, we go celebrate for dinner. 158 00:06:10,257 --> 00:06:11,823 Right, great. And then, yeah, that's the end. 159 00:06:11,825 --> 00:06:13,869 Or the beginning of a great friendship. 160 00:06:14,656 --> 00:06:16,191 You know, I... I feel like we could 161 00:06:16,205 --> 00:06:17,678 get this done pretty quickly. 162 00:06:17,679 --> 00:06:19,345 Do you... do you have a minute now? 163 00:06:19,347 --> 00:06:20,914 I don't know. 164 00:06:20,916 --> 00:06:23,370 I mean, we have a lot of ground to cover. 165 00:06:23,371 --> 00:06:25,952 We should probably block out a big chunk of time. 166 00:06:25,954 --> 00:06:28,588 - Oh. - Say, lunch? 167 00:06:28,927 --> 00:06:30,694 Yeah, okay, sure. Lunch. 168 00:06:30,695 --> 00:06:32,343 Yes! The Horsemen ride again. 169 00:06:32,377 --> 00:06:33,462 Meet me at my car. 170 00:06:33,464 --> 00:06:35,031 I'll put together a playlist. 171 00:06:35,033 --> 00:06:37,379 You can put on some more comfortable clothes... 172 00:06:37,454 --> 00:06:40,421 - Probably just wear this. - Ah, it's perfect. 173 00:06:41,105 --> 00:06:42,772 Attention, Cloud 9 shoppers. 174 00:06:42,774 --> 00:06:46,771 Just a reminder about our emotional support snake policy. 175 00:06:46,772 --> 00:06:49,245 We don't have one, so please do not bring your... 176 00:06:49,247 --> 00:06:51,981 You know how I said there's no way I will ever 177 00:06:51,983 --> 00:06:53,949 forgive you for what happened to my birds? 178 00:06:54,480 --> 00:06:56,072 Well, guess what? There is a way. 179 00:06:56,172 --> 00:06:59,206 I need you to make Colleen quit because I hate her. 180 00:06:59,343 --> 00:07:01,711 Okay, so you hate Colleen, you hate me... 181 00:07:01,712 --> 00:07:03,592 - How many enemies do you have? - 37. 182 00:07:03,594 --> 00:07:06,300 36, and then my bitch neighbor had a baby. 183 00:07:06,301 --> 00:07:08,623 All right, look, Dina, I don't have any beef 184 00:07:08,624 --> 00:07:10,008 with this woman and I don't know how you'd 185 00:07:10,067 --> 00:07:11,933 go about making someone quit. 186 00:07:11,935 --> 00:07:14,035 Well, you managed to make my birds quit living. 187 00:07:14,037 --> 00:07:15,770 I'm sure you can figure something out. 188 00:07:15,772 --> 00:07:17,254 Just get her out of here 189 00:07:17,328 --> 00:07:19,741 and make sure I'm not tied to it at all 190 00:07:19,743 --> 00:07:22,056 and I'll stop doing things like this. 191 00:07:22,946 --> 00:07:24,512 That was Elias's. 192 00:07:24,514 --> 00:07:26,581 Oh, well, that's fine. 193 00:07:26,583 --> 00:07:28,283 Elias is also on my list. 194 00:07:34,257 --> 00:07:36,892 Oh, Mateo, thank God you're here. 195 00:07:36,894 --> 00:07:39,361 I can't get these shirts to lie flat. 196 00:07:39,363 --> 00:07:40,963 How do you do it again? 197 00:07:40,965 --> 00:07:43,532 Okay, so just... anchor it with your thumb 198 00:07:43,534 --> 00:07:45,167 and pull it taut. 199 00:07:45,169 --> 00:07:48,404 Do the same thing on the other side, like so. 200 00:07:48,804 --> 00:07:51,574 One-third, two-thirds, there. 201 00:07:51,576 --> 00:07:53,409 Thin as prosciutto. 202 00:07:53,584 --> 00:07:56,218 Amazing. You're so helpful. 203 00:07:56,491 --> 00:07:58,709 Okay, I know what you're doing, Chey... 204 00:07:58,789 --> 00:08:00,622 and thank you. 205 00:08:00,624 --> 00:08:03,191 Oh, hey, Mateo, I didn't see you there. 206 00:08:03,193 --> 00:08:05,060 Hey, am I doing this right? 207 00:08:05,062 --> 00:08:06,695 - Glen... - 'cause I-I just... I thought 208 00:08:06,697 --> 00:08:08,064 they were supposed to go on their sides... 209 00:08:08,065 --> 00:08:10,164 Glen, let me help... Glen! 210 00:08:10,284 --> 00:08:11,733 Oh, hey, uh... 211 00:08:11,893 --> 00:08:13,768 - Colleen, right? - Yeah, Colleen. 212 00:08:13,770 --> 00:08:15,237 The one whose locker you were just in. 213 00:08:15,239 --> 00:08:17,172 Oh, that's... 214 00:08:17,211 --> 00:08:19,241 That's your locker. I thought it was mine. 215 00:08:19,243 --> 00:08:22,882 No, yours is the one next to you that says "Garrett" 216 00:08:22,883 --> 00:08:24,513 with the "Neon Genesis" sticker. 217 00:08:24,515 --> 00:08:26,748 - Oh, anime fan? - Mm-hmm. 218 00:08:27,503 --> 00:08:28,730 Also a fan of my locker. 219 00:08:28,731 --> 00:08:30,594 Sure, oh... you're gonna head in there right now? 220 00:08:30,595 --> 00:08:31,943 - Mm-hmm. - Yeah, of course. 221 00:08:31,949 --> 00:08:33,250 - Your locker, go for it. - Oh! 222 00:08:38,047 --> 00:08:39,132 I, um... 223 00:08:39,769 --> 00:08:42,269 I put a bunch of fish in your locker. 224 00:08:42,304 --> 00:08:43,972 Mm-hmm, yeah, I can see that. 225 00:08:45,454 --> 00:08:47,955 Still haven't gotten these doors replaced, huh? 226 00:08:47,957 --> 00:08:48,989 If it's good enough 227 00:08:48,990 --> 00:08:50,630 for the United States Postal Service, 228 00:08:50,631 --> 00:08:51,763 it's good enough for me. 229 00:08:51,765 --> 00:08:54,399 All right. Yeah. 230 00:08:55,597 --> 00:08:58,070 Chicken adobo? Mateo's aunt made it for me. 231 00:08:58,072 --> 00:09:00,172 Has that just been sitting in your car all day? 232 00:09:00,174 --> 00:09:01,873 Yeah, boy! It's already warm. 233 00:09:01,875 --> 00:09:03,141 No need to microwave. 234 00:09:04,712 --> 00:09:06,812 So, talking points. 235 00:09:06,813 --> 00:09:09,629 When you talk to the guys about health care, I was thinking... 236 00:09:09,683 --> 00:09:12,206 Whoa, whoa, whoa, dude. You can't just tell me 237 00:09:12,252 --> 00:09:14,086 what to say and then I go and I say it. 238 00:09:14,088 --> 00:09:15,587 Really? I thought we might try that. 239 00:09:15,589 --> 00:09:17,956 No, you gotta find my voice, so when I say it, 240 00:09:17,958 --> 00:09:20,118 it sounds natural. And that means... 241 00:09:20,578 --> 00:09:22,394 a little getting to know you period. 242 00:09:22,776 --> 00:09:24,843 Okay, great. Uh, totally. 243 00:09:24,934 --> 00:09:26,480 So, what should I know? 244 00:09:26,715 --> 00:09:29,497 Well, for starters, do you like this song? 245 00:09:33,802 --> 00:09:36,069 - Yeah... yes? - Noice! 246 00:09:36,686 --> 00:09:38,185 Dude, that's my band. 247 00:09:38,187 --> 00:09:39,367 It's actually just me right now, 248 00:09:39,368 --> 00:09:41,085 but we're looking to fill out the lineup. 249 00:09:41,086 --> 00:09:44,167 Or... maybe we're not looking anymore? 250 00:09:45,999 --> 00:09:50,268 Why, exactly, would you put fish in Colleen's locker? 251 00:09:50,930 --> 00:09:52,596 Because... I'm a bully 252 00:09:52,679 --> 00:09:56,355 and I think this totally nice 253 00:09:56,722 --> 00:09:58,109 and friendly lady 254 00:09:58,570 --> 00:10:01,079 should... quit. 255 00:10:01,427 --> 00:10:03,376 You think that, do you? 256 00:10:04,471 --> 00:10:07,238 Not cool, Garrett. She's a member of our family. 257 00:10:07,587 --> 00:10:10,487 Colleen, I'm so sorry this happened to you. 258 00:10:10,488 --> 00:10:12,323 It's really no big deal. I was just looking 259 00:10:12,325 --> 00:10:15,993 for some Lysol because the fish smell is escalating. 260 00:10:16,273 --> 00:10:18,273 No, it is a big deal 261 00:10:18,275 --> 00:10:20,542 and frankly, he needs to be punished. 262 00:10:20,544 --> 00:10:22,926 I'm putting you on freezer duty. 263 00:10:23,514 --> 00:10:26,215 I don't know what freezer duty is. 264 00:10:26,217 --> 00:10:28,083 Whatever, just go get in the freezer. 265 00:10:28,318 --> 00:10:29,639 Okay. 266 00:10:30,955 --> 00:10:33,622 I'm so sorry, Colleen. I really hope Garrett 267 00:10:33,624 --> 00:10:36,025 doesn't do anything like this again. 268 00:10:36,027 --> 00:10:38,293 So do I, but honestly 269 00:10:38,752 --> 00:10:40,479 this probably won't be the last time 270 00:10:40,788 --> 00:10:42,363 and it probably won't be the most fish. 271 00:10:42,422 --> 00:10:43,952 It will be the last time. 272 00:10:44,997 --> 00:10:47,798 Aw, Sandra. 273 00:10:47,861 --> 00:10:49,840 Can't believe they got you in on this. 274 00:10:50,331 --> 00:10:52,752 - Huh? - Oh, this is so stupid. 275 00:10:53,093 --> 00:10:54,692 I mean, it's so bland. 276 00:10:55,066 --> 00:10:56,901 Like you've got the same color next to each other. 277 00:10:56,902 --> 00:10:58,667 Nothing's accessorized. 278 00:10:58,669 --> 00:11:00,620 It looks like a baby did this. 279 00:11:03,224 --> 00:11:06,099 You guys, Sandra? This is too much. 280 00:11:07,575 --> 00:11:09,647 I... I did my best. 281 00:11:09,991 --> 00:11:12,068 Oh, it's okay. I've got this. 282 00:11:15,055 --> 00:11:17,022 Hey, Sandra, we were... 283 00:11:17,024 --> 00:11:19,891 Hey, um, Mateo? We didn't really... 284 00:11:19,893 --> 00:11:22,293 You guys, um, this is the nicest thing 285 00:11:22,295 --> 00:11:23,828 anyone's ever done for me. 286 00:11:24,070 --> 00:11:26,403 And the fact that you got everyone in the store in on it... I... 287 00:11:28,715 --> 00:11:29,807 I can't even. 288 00:11:30,637 --> 00:11:33,672 Well, yeah, we'd do anything for you, Mateo. 289 00:11:33,674 --> 00:11:35,483 Anything you think we did. 290 00:11:36,169 --> 00:11:38,316 Attention, shoppers, we have a sale today 291 00:11:38,378 --> 00:11:40,712 in our pets department, two for one goldfish. 292 00:11:41,014 --> 00:11:43,851 In sporting goods, fishing rods are fishy percent off. 293 00:11:44,184 --> 00:11:46,685 I think that's supposed to be 50. 294 00:11:46,793 --> 00:11:48,030 And finally... 295 00:11:51,564 --> 00:11:54,131 Come to customer service to get your pound 296 00:11:54,160 --> 00:11:58,163 of locker fish from me, Garrett the Fish McFish. 297 00:11:58,643 --> 00:12:00,498 Have a heavenly day. 298 00:12:00,848 --> 00:12:02,144 Very funny. 299 00:12:02,703 --> 00:12:05,503 You put fish in my locker, I put fish in your announcements. 300 00:12:05,505 --> 00:12:07,806 Fair enough. I'm... I'm sorry about that. 301 00:12:07,808 --> 00:12:11,142 Oh, it's no big deal. I can handle rookie hazing. 302 00:12:11,597 --> 00:12:14,609 And don't worry, I will get you your dead fish back ASAP. 303 00:12:14,969 --> 00:12:17,682 Well you know what, those fish are yours to keep. 304 00:12:17,684 --> 00:12:19,384 Aw, that's really generous. 305 00:12:19,386 --> 00:12:21,519 - I have a big heart. - I bet you do, 306 00:12:22,126 --> 00:12:25,420 but I am very worried that you might meet a hungry cat 307 00:12:25,700 --> 00:12:27,800 and need the dead fish, so... 308 00:12:28,061 --> 00:12:29,553 I should give you my number. 309 00:12:30,905 --> 00:12:32,419 I guess you could do that. 310 00:12:33,281 --> 00:12:35,476 - You have to fire Colleen. - Garrett, I know 311 00:12:35,478 --> 00:12:36,811 Dina put you up to this. 312 00:12:36,864 --> 00:12:39,200 Yes, okay, Dina did put me up to that, 313 00:12:39,201 --> 00:12:40,741 but that's not what this is about. 314 00:12:40,742 --> 00:12:42,876 I think that there... I think there might be something there. 315 00:12:42,878 --> 00:12:44,544 Like... between the two of us. 316 00:12:44,546 --> 00:12:46,246 How? You just met. 317 00:12:46,689 --> 00:12:49,316 She likes anime, okay? She made some jokes. 318 00:12:49,318 --> 00:12:51,785 I don't... I don't have a lot of boxes to check. 319 00:12:52,490 --> 00:12:55,355 God... no, no, no. That can't happen. 320 00:12:55,357 --> 00:12:58,519 Dina would lose her mind. That would be bad for me, 321 00:12:58,800 --> 00:13:00,800 bad for the store, bad for everybody. 322 00:13:00,801 --> 00:13:01,937 Okay, well, yeah, I-I agree. 323 00:13:01,938 --> 00:13:03,138 That's why you need to do something. 324 00:13:03,139 --> 00:13:04,895 Can't you just transfer her to another store? 325 00:13:05,100 --> 00:13:07,137 I mean, I guess I could call around, 326 00:13:07,209 --> 00:13:09,876 but it's not like there's that many empty spots. 327 00:13:09,878 --> 00:13:12,545 In the meantime, can you just not sleep with her? 328 00:13:12,547 --> 00:13:15,058 I... wish I could promise you that, 329 00:13:15,517 --> 00:13:17,721 but I couldn't stop myself from sleeping with Dina 330 00:13:17,775 --> 00:13:19,452 after I killed her birds. 331 00:13:19,454 --> 00:13:22,139 Are you seriously saying you can't promise 332 00:13:22,140 --> 00:13:23,923 to not sleep with one of your coworkers? 333 00:13:24,436 --> 00:13:26,603 That's... that's pretty much what I'm saying. 334 00:13:28,173 --> 00:13:30,421 I don't care what they said. You are beautiful, 335 00:13:30,462 --> 00:13:32,701 you are sexy, and any guy would kill 336 00:13:32,861 --> 00:13:34,060 for a night alone with you. 337 00:13:34,062 --> 00:13:35,495 All right, Mom, I gotta bounce. 338 00:13:35,497 --> 00:13:37,196 Say bye to Jonah. 339 00:13:37,198 --> 00:13:39,832 Bye, Mrs. White. It was nice to meet you. 340 00:13:39,834 --> 00:13:42,902 This whole hour has just flown by. 341 00:13:44,439 --> 00:13:46,105 Fish in the locker? 342 00:13:46,107 --> 00:13:47,774 What kind of bush-league crap is that? 343 00:13:47,776 --> 00:13:49,110 Well, I didn't put a lot of thought in it 344 00:13:49,111 --> 00:13:50,176 because I didn't want to do it. 345 00:13:50,178 --> 00:13:51,744 Okay, you're gonna need some help, 346 00:13:51,746 --> 00:13:54,180 so I'm willing to let you borrow this. 347 00:13:54,695 --> 00:13:56,795 Dina, you still have that bag of meth? 348 00:13:56,835 --> 00:13:58,718 We talked about this. You gotta turn that in. 349 00:13:58,720 --> 00:14:00,220 Then what would I do in situations like this 350 00:14:00,221 --> 00:14:01,554 when I need a bag of meth? 351 00:14:01,556 --> 00:14:04,390 Okay, so, you're talking to Colleen, you casually... 352 00:14:05,021 --> 00:14:06,025 drop it at her feet. 353 00:14:06,027 --> 00:14:08,761 I bring Amy by and, "Oh, Colleen", 354 00:14:09,466 --> 00:14:11,030 did this just fall out of your pocket?" 355 00:14:11,032 --> 00:14:13,733 And she's all, "What? That's not..." 356 00:14:13,735 --> 00:14:15,301 and Amy's like, "Bup, bup, bup, Colleen. 357 00:14:15,303 --> 00:14:17,303 "I don't wanna hear it. You're fired. 358 00:14:17,305 --> 00:14:19,691 And on your way out, give that bag of meth back to Dina." 359 00:14:20,540 --> 00:14:22,240 All right, look. Dina, I wanna help you out, 360 00:14:22,330 --> 00:14:24,310 but this is a little extreme. 361 00:14:24,832 --> 00:14:26,772 You know, most reasonable people 362 00:14:26,892 --> 00:14:29,635 would expect one deed of penance per dead bird, 363 00:14:29,703 --> 00:14:33,152 and here I am very generously offering you a package deal. 364 00:14:33,154 --> 00:14:35,643 All you have to do is plant some illegal drugs 365 00:14:35,710 --> 00:14:37,428 on an innocent, but terrible woman. 366 00:14:40,966 --> 00:14:42,328 It's supposed to be a pyramid. 367 00:14:42,330 --> 00:14:44,163 I think you, of all people, could handle that. 368 00:14:44,165 --> 00:14:47,092 - I'm Syrian, not Egyptian. - Clearly. 369 00:14:48,903 --> 00:14:51,771 Don't mind me... just making it not look like crap. 370 00:14:52,320 --> 00:14:53,506 Labels out. 371 00:14:54,833 --> 00:14:55,908 Thank you. 372 00:14:57,988 --> 00:15:00,041 Sorry, she's not usually this bad. 373 00:15:00,582 --> 00:15:01,848 Heavy stuff 374 00:15:01,850 --> 00:15:03,583 goes in the bottom... 375 00:15:03,859 --> 00:15:05,314 because of gravity. 376 00:15:05,754 --> 00:15:07,253 Well, I mean there's always the option 377 00:15:07,255 --> 00:15:09,422 of not hooking up with Colleen. 378 00:15:09,424 --> 00:15:11,624 Yeah, see, that just doesn't make any sense to me. 379 00:15:12,333 --> 00:15:13,399 I... 380 00:15:14,654 --> 00:15:16,593 J-bone! There you are, buddy. 381 00:15:17,563 --> 00:15:20,033 All right, I am ready to talk union. 382 00:15:20,035 --> 00:15:21,934 I was thinking we could do it over some hoops. 383 00:15:21,936 --> 00:15:25,038 Maybe some one-on-one, a little Horse, 384 00:15:25,787 --> 00:15:27,117 or just, like, run some passing drills? 385 00:15:27,118 --> 00:15:29,776 Uh, you know what, as... as much as I'd like to, um, 386 00:15:30,222 --> 00:15:32,679 to hoop with you, I gotta... 387 00:15:32,681 --> 00:15:34,147 Garrett needs me to help with the... 388 00:15:34,149 --> 00:15:36,049 - No, I don't. - Yeah, yeah, the... you know, 389 00:15:36,051 --> 00:15:38,384 the... the... the announcement that you... 390 00:15:38,386 --> 00:15:40,486 Already did it, man. You're good to go... hoop it up. 391 00:15:40,955 --> 00:15:44,223 - Oh... great, thanks, friend. - Anytime, buddy. 392 00:15:44,225 --> 00:15:46,392 Nice, let's do it! Shirts versus skins. 393 00:15:46,394 --> 00:15:48,261 I'm wearing a shirt, so... Okay, you know what, Marcus, 394 00:15:48,262 --> 00:15:49,862 no, I'm not doing this, okay? 395 00:15:49,864 --> 00:15:51,361 I know I'm supposed to go through you, 396 00:15:51,362 --> 00:15:52,962 but I'm just gonna go in there and I'm gonna talk 397 00:15:52,963 --> 00:15:54,095 to the warehouse guys myself. 398 00:15:54,097 --> 00:15:55,068 You need me, okay? 399 00:15:55,070 --> 00:15:56,703 These guys don't relate to you. 400 00:15:56,705 --> 00:15:58,814 These guys don't listen to NPR 401 00:15:58,815 --> 00:16:00,573 and eat Faberge eggs for breakfast. 402 00:16:00,575 --> 00:16:03,142 - I would hope nobody... - They respond to guys' guys. 403 00:16:03,144 --> 00:16:04,644 You know, guys who work with their hands, 404 00:16:04,646 --> 00:16:06,312 who know how to grill a burger. 405 00:16:06,314 --> 00:16:08,147 - Marcus... - The kind of guys 406 00:16:08,149 --> 00:16:10,550 who would chug a liter of barbecue sauce just 407 00:16:10,552 --> 00:16:13,386 - 'cause someone dared them to. - I disagree, all right? 408 00:16:13,388 --> 00:16:15,408 I think they are gonna listen to reason. 409 00:16:15,409 --> 00:16:16,989 You underestimate these guys. 410 00:16:16,991 --> 00:16:19,533 I'm gonna go in there and I'm not coming out until 411 00:16:19,534 --> 00:16:21,761 every single one of them signs these cards. 412 00:16:21,763 --> 00:16:23,763 Okay, but you're gonna fail. 413 00:16:23,765 --> 00:16:26,750 And I'll be there for you when you do, 'cause we're friends. 414 00:16:27,615 --> 00:16:30,016 Come on, Amy. There's a very angry customer 415 00:16:30,091 --> 00:16:31,590 and she only speaks Spanish, so, uh, 416 00:16:31,592 --> 00:16:33,525 we need you to translate. Get Cody to help. 417 00:16:33,527 --> 00:16:34,804 My Spanish isn't even that good. 418 00:16:34,805 --> 00:16:36,472 No, hers isn't either. That's why it has to be you. 419 00:16:36,473 --> 00:16:38,073 I'm sure she's here somewhere. 420 00:16:38,599 --> 00:16:40,899 Oh, my God. These dogs in bathing suits 421 00:16:40,901 --> 00:16:42,557 make me really uncomfortable. 422 00:16:42,558 --> 00:16:44,269 Yeah, right? I mean, it's so weird. 423 00:16:44,271 --> 00:16:45,474 They should be wearing more tops 424 00:16:45,475 --> 00:16:47,011 'cause dogs have, like, ten nipples. 425 00:16:47,012 --> 00:16:49,575 Oh, so you know zoology and math? 426 00:16:49,577 --> 00:16:51,006 - Well... - You know what, 427 00:16:51,007 --> 00:16:53,136 get Cody to help, or give her a free slushie. 428 00:16:53,137 --> 00:16:55,276 Everyone speaks slushie. I don't have time for this. 429 00:16:57,418 --> 00:16:59,985 So, did you come over here to... 430 00:16:59,987 --> 00:17:01,986 ask me out, maybe? Or... 431 00:17:02,289 --> 00:17:04,151 are you just lurking, or... 432 00:17:04,197 --> 00:17:06,097 Yeah, um, sure. 433 00:17:06,326 --> 00:17:08,849 Did you want to get some tacos after work? 434 00:17:08,850 --> 00:17:11,941 - Yeah, I would. - Okay. 435 00:17:12,399 --> 00:17:14,823 All right, so, this turned into a date. 436 00:17:17,932 --> 00:17:20,338 Uh, hey... uh, guys? 437 00:17:20,758 --> 00:17:22,554 Guys... is it... is it all guys? 438 00:17:22,555 --> 00:17:25,111 We should probably talk about that, but, uh, another day. 439 00:17:25,384 --> 00:17:27,113 So, look. I get that there are 440 00:17:27,114 --> 00:17:29,636 probably some reservations about this whole union thing, 441 00:17:29,637 --> 00:17:32,931 you know, and yeah, I don't seem like you, 442 00:17:32,932 --> 00:17:34,667 you know, at first, because I'm more 443 00:17:34,668 --> 00:17:36,993 booksmart or... not even, not even smarter, 444 00:17:36,994 --> 00:17:39,351 just... just like, um, you know, better educated. 445 00:17:39,352 --> 00:17:41,365 Or... not better... gross, why would I... 446 00:17:41,367 --> 00:17:44,434 - What are you saying? - Uh, what I'm saying is, 447 00:17:44,436 --> 00:17:47,434 I get that this is a little scary, 448 00:17:47,507 --> 00:17:50,292 but what corporate is gonna do if we don't do this 449 00:17:50,442 --> 00:17:52,409 is even scarier, okay? 450 00:17:52,411 --> 00:17:55,700 So, you know, you, you, you, 451 00:17:55,701 --> 00:17:58,682 you're all at risk of being replaced by machines. 452 00:17:58,684 --> 00:17:59,783 So I'm good? 453 00:18:00,345 --> 00:18:02,345 Uh, no, you're... you're at risk, too. 454 00:18:02,460 --> 00:18:03,960 You didn't point at me. 455 00:18:03,962 --> 00:18:06,157 Okay, the pointing was arbitrary. 456 00:18:06,158 --> 00:18:08,718 All right, look, a union is our best shot 457 00:18:08,733 --> 00:18:11,661 at protecting our jobs. Okay, so who's with me? 458 00:18:12,431 --> 00:18:15,399 I don't know. Can we trust this guy? 459 00:18:15,401 --> 00:18:16,416 Honestly, I'm not sure. 460 00:18:16,417 --> 00:18:18,372 Guys, of course you can trust me, okay? 461 00:18:18,373 --> 00:18:20,137 I'm... I'm... I'm a fighter. 462 00:18:20,139 --> 00:18:22,906 You know, we are... we are the same. 463 00:18:22,908 --> 00:18:24,541 We are the every man, you know? 464 00:18:24,543 --> 00:18:26,035 I... you... and we... we share... 465 00:18:26,036 --> 00:18:28,045 look, you wanna... you wanna watch me, uh, 466 00:18:28,047 --> 00:18:29,456 you wanna watch me chug this ranch? 467 00:18:29,457 --> 00:18:30,796 I'm gonna slam this ranch. 468 00:18:30,797 --> 00:18:32,581 Watch me slam this ranch! 469 00:18:32,885 --> 00:18:35,054 Okay. Mmm... 470 00:18:42,367 --> 00:18:43,545 He's in my band. 471 00:18:44,470 --> 00:18:46,804 What do you mean you're going on a date with her? 472 00:18:46,806 --> 00:18:49,006 Well, it was either that or plant crystal meth on her. 473 00:18:49,127 --> 00:18:51,728 Okay, so in the whole world, those were your two options? 474 00:18:51,777 --> 00:18:53,085 It seemed like it at the time. 475 00:18:53,098 --> 00:18:55,533 Well, guess what I just heard 476 00:18:55,574 --> 00:18:58,175 from my dear friend Colleen? 477 00:18:58,177 --> 00:19:00,552 You two are going out. 478 00:19:02,100 --> 00:19:04,634 Well, it's true. I'm going out with Colleen. 479 00:19:04,783 --> 00:19:06,980 Oh man, Garrett. 480 00:19:07,025 --> 00:19:09,324 That is... messed up. 481 00:19:10,061 --> 00:19:12,760 You're gonna go out with Colleen to get her 482 00:19:12,785 --> 00:19:15,452 to fall in love with you just so you can break her heart? 483 00:19:15,761 --> 00:19:18,203 Wait... what are you talking about? 484 00:19:18,289 --> 00:19:20,222 Yeah. Yes, Amy, 485 00:19:20,224 --> 00:19:23,288 that's what I'm doing. I just felt so bad 486 00:19:23,682 --> 00:19:25,682 for what I did to your birds that I didn't think 487 00:19:25,684 --> 00:19:28,051 getting Colleen to quit was good enough. 488 00:19:28,200 --> 00:19:31,434 Wait, so all of this is just... a long con? 489 00:19:31,543 --> 00:19:34,578 - Oh, yeah. - I can't believe I fell for this. 490 00:19:34,580 --> 00:19:36,346 Of course you're not interested in Colleen. 491 00:19:36,348 --> 00:19:39,487 No one is. This is really good. 492 00:19:39,621 --> 00:19:41,351 All right, we gotta make sure you win her over. 493 00:19:41,512 --> 00:19:42,845 - Okay... - And forget tacos. 494 00:19:42,881 --> 00:19:44,454 You need to woo this woman. 495 00:19:44,456 --> 00:19:45,922 I'll make a reservation somewhere romantic 496 00:19:46,324 --> 00:19:48,491 and I'll give them my credit card. I mean, it's the least I can do 497 00:19:48,492 --> 00:19:50,881 - since you're doing this for me. - Oh, yeah, the least you could do. 498 00:19:50,882 --> 00:19:52,249 - Can't believe you. - Yeah. 499 00:19:52,250 --> 00:19:53,916 I can't believe him either. 500 00:19:53,918 --> 00:19:55,918 That's... totally... 501 00:19:56,952 --> 00:19:57,987 insane. 502 00:19:57,989 --> 00:20:00,562 Vendor, then item number, then delete. 503 00:20:00,750 --> 00:20:01,849 Allison. 504 00:20:03,261 --> 00:20:05,661 Uh, hey, Mateo. 505 00:20:05,776 --> 00:20:08,554 Um, you know how you've been helping everyone out... 506 00:20:08,666 --> 00:20:09,666 like, a lot? 507 00:20:09,667 --> 00:20:11,190 And you've really helped fill 508 00:20:11,191 --> 00:20:13,436 that Mateo-sized hole in the store. 509 00:20:13,438 --> 00:20:15,605 You guys, stop. I can't. 510 00:20:16,231 --> 00:20:18,107 - What? - It's too much. 511 00:20:18,109 --> 00:20:19,609 Okay, at first it was sweet, 512 00:20:19,611 --> 00:20:21,444 but now I'm just doing everyone's jobs for them 513 00:20:21,446 --> 00:20:22,979 and I'm not even getting paid. 514 00:20:23,214 --> 00:20:25,347 You took advantage of my greatest weakness... 515 00:20:25,555 --> 00:20:26,663 my enormous heart. 516 00:20:28,873 --> 00:20:30,440 Have fun, you two. 517 00:20:30,755 --> 00:20:33,355 Get dessert. Order a nice bottle of wine. 518 00:20:33,357 --> 00:20:34,590 Splurge! 519 00:20:34,592 --> 00:20:37,194 So, great news. 520 00:20:37,195 --> 00:20:39,755 Crestwood's assistant manager had a pallet dropped on her. 521 00:20:40,030 --> 00:20:41,697 I mean, it's bad. She's gonna be fine. 522 00:20:41,699 --> 00:20:43,365 She's getting a ton of money. But I begged them 523 00:20:43,367 --> 00:20:45,347 to take Colleen, and they said yes. 524 00:20:45,603 --> 00:20:47,703 Wait, so Colleen's out of the store 525 00:20:47,705 --> 00:20:49,371 and Garrett's gonna break her heart? 526 00:20:49,373 --> 00:20:50,732 Mm-hmm. 527 00:20:50,733 --> 00:20:53,208 This day just keeps getting better and better. 528 00:20:53,210 --> 00:20:57,361 Got the warehouse guys back on board without Marcus's help. 529 00:20:57,362 --> 00:20:58,747 - Oh, good. - Yep, yep. 530 00:20:58,749 --> 00:20:59,916 It turns out at the end of the day, 531 00:20:59,917 --> 00:21:01,188 people just wanna connect 532 00:21:01,189 --> 00:21:02,615 on a human level, you know? 533 00:21:02,616 --> 00:21:05,587 Uh-huh. Uh, what's all over your shirt? 534 00:21:05,589 --> 00:21:08,056 That is... a gallon of ranch. 535 00:21:08,058 --> 00:21:09,970 I had to chug a gallon of r anch. 536 00:21:10,227 --> 00:21:12,060 Is that, uh... 537 00:21:12,062 --> 00:21:13,323 There it is. 538 00:21:15,885 --> 00:21:18,286 - A bag of meth. - Ah. 539 00:21:18,920 --> 00:21:21,493 Synced and corrected by hawken45 for www.addic7ed.com