1
00:00:05,382 --> 00:00:07,928
So, again,
I just want it on record

2
00:00:07,953 --> 00:00:10,357
I'm 100% against this.

3
00:00:10,382 --> 00:00:12,982
Aw, you're 100%
against everything cool.

4
00:00:13,007 --> 00:00:14,873
No, I'm not. Shut up.

5
00:00:14,945 --> 00:00:17,537
- Like what?
- Um, Ranch Tub.

6
00:00:17,562 --> 00:00:18,562
- Oh, for the...
- Come on, man.

7
00:00:18,587 --> 00:00:20,406
Everybody was against Ranch Tub!

8
00:00:20,431 --> 00:00:23,084
Seriously, Pam, quit trying
to make Ranch Tub happen.

9
00:00:23,109 --> 00:00:25,248
Do I even want to know
what that is?

10
00:00:25,273 --> 00:00:27,404
Only if you never
want to eat ranch again.

11
00:00:27,429 --> 00:00:29,389
- I meant ranch.
- What?

12
00:00:29,414 --> 00:00:31,176
- That's a food?
- It's not important.

13
00:00:31,201 --> 00:00:32,428
- I wouldn't go that far.
- Can we please...

14
00:00:32,453 --> 00:00:33,800
- Cyril, shut up.
- Seriously.

15
00:00:33,801 --> 00:00:35,935
Come on, if we're gonna
do this, let's do it already.

16
00:00:35,960 --> 00:00:37,414
We're sitting ducks
with you two out there.

17
00:00:37,439 --> 00:00:39,748
- Well, whose fault is that?
- What? Yours!

18
00:00:39,773 --> 00:00:42,006
You made us stop on the way
to Earth for the damn thing.

19
00:00:42,031 --> 00:00:46,256
Exactly, and everybody remember
that when it's time to divvy it up.

20
00:00:46,281 --> 00:00:47,977
Do you think
it's worth anything?

21
00:00:48,002 --> 00:00:49,601
Hmm, hard to say.

22
00:00:52,257 --> 00:00:53,703
I've never seen anything like it.

23
00:00:53,704 --> 00:00:55,334
So you just jam it
with my new pen?

24
00:00:55,359 --> 00:00:58,468
- This is new, this pen right here?
- Yes, as a matter...

25
00:00:59,007 --> 00:01:01,459
- You know...
- Ooh. Maybe it's ambergris.

26
00:01:01,484 --> 00:01:03,131
How could it be ambergris?

27
00:01:03,156 --> 00:01:06,455
- If a whale puked it up, duh.
- Oh, a space whale?

28
00:01:06,480 --> 00:01:08,227
I don't know all the types of whale!

29
00:01:08,252 --> 00:01:10,565
And yet somehow you know
about ambergr...

30
00:01:10,590 --> 00:01:13,640
- Oh, maybe its mithril!
- Is that some other food?

31
00:01:13,641 --> 00:01:15,680
No! And it's not mithril.

32
00:01:15,705 --> 00:01:17,810
- Just checking.
- Whatever the hell it is,

33
00:01:17,811 --> 00:01:19,986
just box it up and let's go already!

34
00:01:20,011 --> 00:01:22,971
All right! Jesus!
So what do you think, Cyril?

35
00:01:23,494 --> 00:01:27,471
- About what?
- Is it firm enough to shove in the box?

36
00:01:29,307 --> 00:01:30,424
Nobody?

37
00:01:31,266 --> 00:01:32,850
What, like "space phrasing"?

38
00:01:32,875 --> 00:01:35,174
No. Never mind.

39
00:02:07,998 --> 00:02:13,463
sync & correction by f1nc0
~ Addic7ed.com ~

40
00:02:19,582 --> 00:02:21,584
And radiation levels are...

41
00:02:21,811 --> 00:02:24,362
normal... across the spectrum.

42
00:02:24,387 --> 00:02:27,331
Well, keep testing.
Radiation's just one danger.

43
00:02:27,356 --> 00:02:29,338
That thing could be carrying
deadly bacteria

44
00:02:29,363 --> 00:02:30,793
- or some kind of virus.
- First of all...

45
00:02:30,794 --> 00:02:33,049
Bacteria and virus
are the same thing, dummy.

46
00:02:33,074 --> 00:02:35,034
- No, they're not.
- Shut up. Krieger?

47
00:02:35,059 --> 00:02:37,834
- They are not.
- Oh, well, what am I thinking of?

48
00:02:37,835 --> 00:02:39,802
Space whores, presumably.

49
00:02:39,803 --> 00:02:41,807
Well, right then, I was, but...

50
00:02:41,832 --> 00:02:43,940
Hey, nobody gets out of there
until I'm sure that thing's

51
00:02:43,941 --> 00:02:46,542
not a hazard to the ship, so
the longer you dick around,

52
00:02:46,567 --> 00:02:48,385
the longer you're gonna stay
in quarantine.

53
00:02:48,410 --> 00:02:50,012
- Any questions?
- What the...

54
00:02:50,130 --> 00:02:51,898
Yeah, are you doinks done yet?

55
00:02:51,899 --> 00:02:53,933
'Cause I wanna check
that crazy thing out.

56
00:02:53,934 --> 00:02:55,245
- Pam!
- What?

57
00:02:55,270 --> 00:02:57,393
You just broke quarantine, dumbass.

58
00:02:57,418 --> 00:03:00,907
So if there's anything deadly on it,
now the entire ship's infected.

59
00:03:00,908 --> 00:03:02,842
Yeah, but you wouldn't have been.

60
00:03:02,843 --> 00:03:04,832
- What?
- Helmet, genius.

61
00:03:05,133 --> 00:03:06,500
God damn it.

62
00:03:08,128 --> 00:03:10,378
I'm gonna call him Cubert!

63
00:03:11,869 --> 00:03:14,214
Okay, that was the last test.

64
00:03:14,239 --> 00:03:17,947
And I can confidently say that
the object poses no nuclear,

65
00:03:17,972 --> 00:03:21,182
chemical, or biological
threat to the ship or crew.

66
00:03:21,207 --> 00:03:23,494
Not that we could've
done anything about it if it did,

67
00:03:23,519 --> 00:03:25,707
- thanks to Pam.
- You are welcome.

68
00:03:25,732 --> 00:03:29,150
Hey, can we take a second?
Isn't it crazy that that little scanner

69
00:03:29,175 --> 00:03:31,611
can do all those
wildly different tests?

70
00:03:31,636 --> 00:03:34,385
- I mean, come on.
- Yeah, pretty great.

71
00:03:34,410 --> 00:03:37,408
Yes, hooray for everything.
Now, what's it worth?

72
00:03:37,433 --> 00:03:38,675
Well, that, I can't say.

73
00:03:38,700 --> 00:03:40,471
I don't even know
what elements it's made of...

74
00:03:40,496 --> 00:03:42,658
Assuming
they're even known to us.

75
00:03:42,683 --> 00:03:45,935
- I'll have to do many more tests to...
- Ooh, here's a test.

76
00:03:45,936 --> 00:03:48,332
- Cut the damn thing open and...
- Whoa, hey!

77
00:03:48,886 --> 00:03:51,174
- Cool!
- Holy shit! It's magnetic!

78
00:03:51,199 --> 00:03:53,769
No, I don't think so.
There's metal all over

79
00:03:53,794 --> 00:03:56,463
- the place in here, so...
- Oh, my God! Our fillings!

80
00:03:56,488 --> 00:03:58,764
What are you talking about?

81
00:03:58,789 --> 00:04:01,105
A, fillings are nonferrous, so...

82
00:04:03,410 --> 00:04:04,683
So...

83
00:04:07,777 --> 00:04:11,191
- So even if it were magnetic...
- It's not gonna eat your damn fillings.

84
00:04:17,120 --> 00:04:22,126
- But I don't think it is a magnet. See?
- Well, then how...

85
00:04:22,199 --> 00:04:24,873
Okay, um, pick up another scalpel.

86
00:04:25,941 --> 00:04:29,175
- And?
- Huh. Well, I had a theory...

87
00:04:30,931 --> 00:04:32,824
- Damn it, woman! If you don't...
- Ah!

88
00:04:33,134 --> 00:04:34,511
Oh, shit.

89
00:04:35,486 --> 00:04:37,353
That it was reacting to a weapon.

90
00:04:37,378 --> 00:04:39,597
Then let's kill it!
Kill it!

91
00:04:39,622 --> 00:04:40,807
Kill it before...

92
00:04:40,908 --> 00:04:41,941
- Whoa!
- Aah!

93
00:04:42,103 --> 00:04:43,213
- Oh, shit.
- Uh...

94
00:04:44,043 --> 00:04:45,525
Hmm, or maybe just aggression.

95
00:04:45,550 --> 00:04:46,463
- What?
- Huh.

96
00:04:46,488 --> 00:04:48,574
Come on, you're saying
it can read our emotions?

97
00:04:48,599 --> 00:04:51,050
I'm not saying anything... yet.

98
00:04:52,261 --> 00:04:54,037
- How 'bout now?
- Oh, no.

99
00:04:54,038 --> 00:04:57,160
Sorry, need to do a whole big
series of tests before I can...

100
00:05:00,636 --> 00:05:03,061
- Huh, still interrupting.
- Typical.

101
00:05:03,293 --> 00:05:05,019
But we should probably... uh...

102
00:05:06,337 --> 00:05:08,738
Carol, come on.
Let's get out of there.

103
00:05:10,050 --> 00:05:11,613
Wow, that's...

104
00:05:13,144 --> 00:05:15,111
- Somebody give me a hand here.
- I can help.

105
00:05:15,136 --> 00:05:16,378
Somebody strong.

106
00:05:17,167 --> 00:05:18,433
Ready?

107
00:05:20,931 --> 00:05:23,371
I mean... I mean,
that's crazy, right?

108
00:05:24,113 --> 00:05:26,385
All right, Jesus.
I'm doing it.

109
00:05:26,410 --> 00:05:28,535
- Okay, Pam, you're up.
- Mm-kay.

110
00:05:28,753 --> 00:05:30,980
One, two, three, go.

111
00:05:32,755 --> 00:05:34,949
Son of a... Go!

112
00:05:39,581 --> 00:05:41,103
I just thought of something.

113
00:05:41,128 --> 00:05:43,510
Oh, my God,
if you say "Ranch Tub"...

114
00:05:43,535 --> 00:05:46,863
No, shut up.
Look, I can bench, like, 500 kilos,

115
00:05:46,888 --> 00:05:50,957
- so I can keep pulling on her, but...
- Eventually something's gotta give.

116
00:05:50,994 --> 00:05:55,395
Like her birdy little neck bones.
Because whatever this thing is,

117
00:05:55,420 --> 00:05:57,588
I mean, it's obviously supernatural.

118
00:05:57,613 --> 00:05:59,377
Well, since when is it supernatural?

119
00:05:59,402 --> 00:06:01,070
- Well, it's not a magnet.
- Oh, come on.

120
00:06:01,071 --> 00:06:05,363
So those are our only two options,
ghosts or magnets?

121
00:06:06,581 --> 00:06:07,697
- I mean...
- Oh, come on.

122
00:06:07,722 --> 00:06:11,127
This is just some bullshit of yours
to put off going back to Earth.

123
00:06:11,152 --> 00:06:14,228
What?
So, what, Lana, I conjured up

124
00:06:14,253 --> 00:06:16,971
some kind of...
telepathic ghost cube?

125
00:06:16,996 --> 00:06:19,611
I didn't say you
conjured it up, dickwrap.

126
00:06:19,636 --> 00:06:21,503
I said that...

127
00:06:23,076 --> 00:06:25,003
Huh.

128
00:06:25,800 --> 00:06:27,636
Well, I hope you're all...

129
00:06:28,652 --> 00:06:30,032
Jeezy Petes.

130
00:06:30,033 --> 00:06:32,034
- Happy.
- Is she breathing?

131
00:06:32,035 --> 00:06:34,307
- No.
- So she's...

132
00:06:34,332 --> 00:06:36,886
- I mean...
- Oh! If only we had access

133
00:06:36,911 --> 00:06:40,097
to some sort of device
which could tell us!

134
00:06:40,820 --> 00:06:42,330
- Krieger!
- What's that?

135
00:06:42,355 --> 00:06:45,040
Oh, right, the scanner!
Doy.

136
00:06:45,065 --> 00:06:46,949
Hang on, let me reset it for...

137
00:06:47,401 --> 00:06:49,144
Ah, Jesus!

138
00:06:49,169 --> 00:06:50,707
Are you okay?

139
00:06:51,511 --> 00:06:53,496
- I think so.
- What was it like?

140
00:06:53,521 --> 00:06:55,263
- What did you see?
- I don't know. It...

141
00:06:55,714 --> 00:06:57,369
I can't explain it.

142
00:06:57,394 --> 00:06:59,262
- Oh, my God!
- What?

143
00:06:59,263 --> 00:07:00,876
- I just remembered.
- Remembered what?

144
00:07:00,901 --> 00:07:02,898
I don't even have fillings.

145
00:07:18,929 --> 00:07:21,096
So that whole time
you're in there,

146
00:07:21,121 --> 00:07:22,822
you didn't see anything?

147
00:07:22,847 --> 00:07:25,330
No, I mean, it's hard to explain.

148
00:07:25,355 --> 00:07:29,433
It was kind of like I was...
nothing... and everything?

149
00:07:29,558 --> 00:07:30,736
If that makes any sense.

150
00:07:30,761 --> 00:07:33,385
About as much as what normally
comes out of your mouth.

151
00:07:33,410 --> 00:07:37,330
- And speaking of your mouth...
- What about it?

152
00:07:37,331 --> 00:07:40,799
- You're really packing it away there.
- Um, I'm hungry. Sue me.

153
00:07:40,824 --> 00:07:44,283
I will if it turns out you ate all
the priceless filling out of that cube.

154
00:07:44,308 --> 00:07:45,910
Oh, my God.

155
00:07:47,746 --> 00:07:48,808
What?

156
00:07:50,988 --> 00:07:53,082
- Pointless.
- You really think it's worth something?

157
00:07:53,107 --> 00:07:55,307
It's gotta be,
I mean, to somebody.

158
00:07:55,332 --> 00:07:57,541
And whom might that somebody be?

159
00:07:57,566 --> 00:08:00,222
Well, obviously we need
to do some market research,

160
00:08:00,247 --> 00:08:01,885
- but it's...
- It's gone.

161
00:08:01,910 --> 00:08:03,172
- What?
- Wait, what?

162
00:08:03,173 --> 00:08:04,113
Gone?

163
00:08:05,125 --> 00:08:07,753
- What are you doing?
- What's the matter?

164
00:08:07,778 --> 00:08:09,964
Hey, the food ain't that bad, baby.

165
00:08:12,299 --> 00:08:14,066
What's wrong?
Are you choking?

166
00:08:14,091 --> 00:08:16,502
- Typical.
- W-w-w-what's the matter?

167
00:08:16,527 --> 00:08:19,074
- This is serious.
- Get a spoon in her!

168
00:08:19,099 --> 00:08:20,266
Space phrasing!

169
00:08:20,777 --> 00:08:23,369
- No.
- Plus, that's a collectible!

170
00:08:24,722 --> 00:08:26,293
Get that spoon in her!

171
00:08:26,318 --> 00:08:27,738
I'm trying.

172
00:08:34,971 --> 00:08:35,971
- Oh, God.
- Ugh!

173
00:08:35,996 --> 00:08:38,721
- Gross.
- What the shit with the spoon?!

174
00:08:38,746 --> 00:08:39,824
- I...
- We thought you were...

175
00:08:39,849 --> 00:08:42,814
What, "She's choking, so let's shove
a goddamn spoon down her throat"?

176
00:08:42,839 --> 00:08:44,473
- Yeah, Cyril.
- Hey, you know what?

177
00:08:44,498 --> 00:08:46,265
I know the stupid cube is gone.

178
00:08:46,266 --> 00:08:47,807
- Yeah.
- Yeah, what happened?

179
00:08:47,832 --> 00:08:50,863
- Yeah, what the shit, Krieger?
- It was right here on...

180
00:08:50,888 --> 00:08:52,908
well, six inches above the table.

181
00:08:52,933 --> 00:08:55,557
I needed some more
sterilizing wipes, so I...

182
00:08:55,582 --> 00:08:57,293
Why would you need sterilizing wipes?

183
00:08:57,294 --> 00:08:59,807
- I...
- Oh, Krieger, buddy.

184
00:08:59,832 --> 00:09:01,963
Please tell me you didn't try
to have sex with the ghost cube.

185
00:09:01,988 --> 00:09:03,824
- Krieger!
- That's nasty, Krieger!

186
00:09:03,949 --> 00:09:05,267
- Ew!
- No, of course I didn't.

187
00:09:05,302 --> 00:09:06,636
We can check the security footage.

188
00:09:06,661 --> 00:09:08,510
There isn't any.
The camera was off.

189
00:09:08,535 --> 00:09:11,174
- Oh, how convenient.
- I did not have sex with the cube.

190
00:09:11,199 --> 00:09:15,161
- Because first of all, with what?
- Oh, okay, okay.

191
00:09:15,162 --> 00:09:17,533
You wanna make your stupid
little Ken Doll jokes?

192
00:09:17,558 --> 00:09:19,165
Would they be warranted?

193
00:09:19,166 --> 00:09:20,266
- I...
- Focus, people.

194
00:09:20,267 --> 00:09:22,877
There's a million credits'
worth of ghost cube missing.

195
00:09:23,597 --> 00:09:25,113
What happened, Ken?

196
00:09:25,502 --> 00:09:27,215
As I was saying...

197
00:09:27,240 --> 00:09:28,971
I needed more sterilizing wipes.

198
00:09:28,996 --> 00:09:31,226
I need more sterilizing wipes.

199
00:09:31,652 --> 00:09:34,600
So I walked out the door,
and after it closed behind m,

200
00:09:34,625 --> 00:09:37,386
I keyed in the alphanumeric
code to lock it.

201
00:09:41,749 --> 00:09:43,650
I walked down to the supply room,

202
00:09:43,675 --> 00:09:45,628
got the wipes,
and walked back.

203
00:09:45,933 --> 00:09:49,464
I keyed in the code to unlock
the aforementioned door.

204
00:09:55,411 --> 00:09:56,478
I walked in...

205
00:09:56,503 --> 00:09:57,421
What the...

206
00:09:57,446 --> 00:09:58,629
The cube was gone.

207
00:09:58,933 --> 00:10:01,861
So obviously one of you took it.

208
00:10:01,886 --> 00:10:03,259
- No, we did not!
- That's bullshit.

209
00:10:03,260 --> 00:10:05,213
Nobody took your new girlfriend.

210
00:10:05,238 --> 00:10:07,580
Yeah, plus, we were all
together in the mess, so...

211
00:10:07,605 --> 00:10:12,574
- So how did it leave a locked room?
- Plenty of ways. Here, hold this.

212
00:10:14,437 --> 00:10:18,033
All right, let's go find that thing.
And let's all split up.

213
00:10:18,058 --> 00:10:20,202
We can cover a lot more ground
that way.

214
00:10:20,227 --> 00:10:23,900
So individually go bumbling
around this big ole spaceship

215
00:10:23,925 --> 00:10:25,264
looking for a ghost.

216
00:10:25,265 --> 00:10:27,399
To bumble or not is up to you,

217
00:10:27,878 --> 00:10:30,235
but whoever finds it gets to keep it.

218
00:10:30,260 --> 00:10:32,150
- Wait, what?
- Findies keepies!

219
00:10:32,175 --> 00:10:33,875
- Wait a minute, what?
- Huh?

220
00:10:36,378 --> 00:10:38,236
- Out of my way!
- No, no, no, no!

221
00:10:38,261 --> 00:10:40,878
Get out of my way! No!

222
00:10:40,903 --> 00:10:42,230
And bumble it is.

223
00:10:42,255 --> 00:10:44,143
- Get out of my way, meathead.
- I saw it first!

224
00:10:44,675 --> 00:10:45,978
Wait a minute.

225
00:10:46,003 --> 00:10:48,525
Now, look, before you all
go running off half-cocked...

226
00:10:48,550 --> 00:10:49,861
Krieger, we don't have time
to pile on you

227
00:10:49,886 --> 00:10:52,625
- with a bunch of no-dick jokes.
- I knew it right when I said it.

228
00:10:52,626 --> 00:10:54,636
- I call bridge!
- Well, I'm coming with you.

229
00:10:54,661 --> 00:10:57,439
- No, you're not.
- Uh... well, then I-I get the crew quarters.

230
00:10:57,464 --> 00:10:59,398
You better not go in my boudoir!

231
00:10:59,399 --> 00:11:00,808
Okay, I call dibs on the... aah!

232
00:11:00,833 --> 00:11:05,137
- Dibs on them ribs, sucka!
- Oh, holy shit. That really hurt.

233
00:11:05,162 --> 00:11:07,159
Well, if you think that hurt...

234
00:11:10,402 --> 00:11:11,886
That's disconcerting.

235
00:11:11,911 --> 00:11:15,246
- Yeah, ya think?
- Yes.

236
00:11:16,363 --> 00:11:18,378
I said no, God damn it!

237
00:11:18,466 --> 00:11:20,089
- Get out!
- Hey!

238
00:11:20,114 --> 00:11:22,619
I won't have you manhandling
my beautiful things.

239
00:11:22,644 --> 00:11:24,432
Well, how do I know it's not in there?

240
00:11:24,457 --> 00:11:27,225
- Because we said so.
- Who's "we"?

241
00:11:28,763 --> 00:11:30,764
Is that supposed to be funny?

242
00:11:34,942 --> 00:11:36,159
Hope it was his dick.

243
00:11:36,184 --> 00:11:38,135
- Right in the foot!
- Eh.

244
00:11:39,754 --> 00:11:43,270
- Any luck?
- No, Lana. And this is my area, so...

245
00:11:44,311 --> 00:11:46,245
So...

246
00:11:46,270 --> 00:11:49,246
So... so talk
about space whores, huh?

247
00:11:49,271 --> 00:11:51,239
- Excuse me?
- I, um...

248
00:11:52,348 --> 00:11:54,589
Uh, nothing.
Uh, ne... never mind.

249
00:11:54,614 --> 00:11:57,721
- I'll never your mind.
- Um, airball.

250
00:11:57,746 --> 00:12:01,427
- I'll... air your balls.
- Yeah, yeah, you will.

251
00:12:01,428 --> 00:12:02,661
God damn it!

252
00:12:02,662 --> 00:12:04,643
Holy shit,
I think I'm seeing things.

253
00:12:04,668 --> 00:12:06,645
I maybe need to get
some sleep, huh?

254
00:12:07,660 --> 00:12:09,477
Or at least my balls aired out.

255
00:12:09,502 --> 00:12:11,370
Yeah, right?

256
00:12:11,371 --> 00:12:13,128
- Hey.
- Who the hell are you, man?

257
00:12:13,153 --> 00:12:15,567
What are you...
I'm TV's Michael Gray.

258
00:12:16,078 --> 00:12:17,737
TV's Michael Gray who?

259
00:12:18,728 --> 00:12:20,151
Uh, TV's Michael Gray

260
00:12:20,176 --> 00:12:22,498
says quit being a dick
and open the door?

261
00:12:22,734 --> 00:12:24,635
Seriously, quit being a dick.

262
00:12:24,660 --> 00:12:27,302
Okay, um, h-hang on.

263
00:12:27,504 --> 00:12:29,089
Okay, on three. Ready?

264
00:12:29,114 --> 00:12:31,818
- Can we not do it on one?
- Shut up, okay.

265
00:12:31,843 --> 00:12:34,371
One... two!

266
00:12:37,970 --> 00:12:39,886
Disconcerting.

267
00:12:46,243 --> 00:12:47,826
Michael.

268
00:12:48,124 --> 00:12:49,635
TV's Michael Gray.

269
00:12:49,660 --> 00:12:51,424
Mikey-Mike, where are you?

270
00:12:51,449 --> 00:12:52,823
Who the hell's Mikey-Mike?

271
00:12:52,848 --> 00:12:54,731
Exactly, that's what I'm...

272
00:12:55,191 --> 00:12:57,067
'Cause you think he'd like
some of this?

273
00:12:58,424 --> 00:12:59,557
What? No.

274
00:12:59,582 --> 00:13:01,848
Stop that.
What... what are you doing?

275
00:13:03,996 --> 00:13:06,082
I'm hungry. Sue me.

276
00:13:07,293 --> 00:13:08,482
And then get up to the bridge.

277
00:13:08,507 --> 00:13:10,417
Her Lanaship has
some big announcement.

278
00:13:10,442 --> 00:13:13,848
- Whoa, what, did somebody find it?
- Find what?

279
00:13:15,043 --> 00:13:16,135
What cube?

280
00:13:16,136 --> 00:13:20,331
Mother, I am extremely not in the
mood, so seriously, where is it?

281
00:13:20,356 --> 00:13:23,604
You mean like an ice cube
or something in a Rubik...

282
00:13:23,629 --> 00:13:25,792
- Quit dicking around already!
- Hey, whoa.

283
00:13:25,817 --> 00:13:29,589
I'm talking about the mysterious
and possibly haunted ghost cube

284
00:13:29,614 --> 00:13:32,893
- that Carol got her head stuck in.
- I think I'd remember that.

285
00:13:32,918 --> 00:13:34,823
And I'd be the first one to believe

286
00:13:34,848 --> 00:13:36,729
she got her head
stuck in something.

287
00:13:36,754 --> 00:13:39,643
- Thank you.
- But you are just sounding insane.

288
00:13:39,668 --> 00:13:42,028
You sound insane!
All of you!

289
00:13:42,832 --> 00:13:45,229
Oh, oh, and I all know
what you're trying to do.

290
00:13:45,755 --> 00:13:49,149
You wanna
maybe walk us through that?

291
00:13:49,512 --> 00:13:52,932
Oh, my God.
I know somebody found the cube

292
00:13:52,957 --> 00:13:55,885
- and that it's findies keepies.
- You mean finders keepers.

293
00:13:55,910 --> 00:13:57,839
But don't stand there and lie to me!

294
00:13:57,864 --> 00:13:59,537
- Nobody's...
- Plus, you dressing

295
00:13:59,562 --> 00:14:01,479
- like a whore?
- Excuse me?

296
00:14:01,504 --> 00:14:03,779
- And how is Cyril's foot okay?
- Uh, what, now?

297
00:14:03,804 --> 00:14:05,604
You got shot in the foot, asshole.

298
00:14:05,629 --> 00:14:08,559
And, oh, my God,
TV's Michael Gray?

299
00:14:08,584 --> 00:14:09,768
- TV's Michael who?
- Huh?

300
00:14:09,793 --> 00:14:12,893
All right. I don't know
if you got in the meds locker

301
00:14:12,918 --> 00:14:16,721
or if this is just the onset
of tertiary syphilis, but...

302
00:14:16,746 --> 00:14:20,582
- He better not have syphilis.
- Why had he better not have syphilis?

303
00:14:21,418 --> 00:14:23,215
I... wh...
because syphilis is bad, dude.

304
00:14:23,240 --> 00:14:25,016
Listen to me, God damn it!

305
00:14:25,041 --> 00:14:26,824
- Oh!
- Easy!

306
00:14:27,012 --> 00:14:29,091
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, man.
- And speaking of meds,

307
00:14:29,092 --> 00:14:32,744
don't you think you could use
a bit of a... relaxer?

308
00:14:32,769 --> 00:14:35,869
- No!
- Oh, now... Krieger, don't you have

309
00:14:35,894 --> 00:14:38,881
- something to take the edge off?
- As a matter of fact...

310
00:14:38,916 --> 00:14:41,136
You and your pills keep
away from me, you...

311
00:14:41,137 --> 00:14:42,371
you dickless fish!

312
00:14:42,372 --> 00:14:44,268
- Wha...
- He's got a gun!

313
00:14:44,293 --> 00:14:47,152
Sterling!
Sterling, look at me.

314
00:14:47,499 --> 00:14:49,400
Now, I don't know what's wrong,

315
00:14:49,425 --> 00:14:52,908
but I promise you,
whatever it is, we'll fix it.

316
00:14:52,933 --> 00:14:54,512
But first you have to trust us.

317
00:14:54,537 --> 00:14:56,438
- Oh, no.
- Suit yourself.

318
00:14:56,463 --> 00:14:57,763
- Krieger?
- Yep, yep, yep!

319
00:14:57,788 --> 00:14:58,788
No, no, no, no...

320
00:15:02,582 --> 00:15:03,746
You dick.

321
00:15:04,227 --> 00:15:05,227
Jesus!

322
00:15:10,534 --> 00:15:13,963
All right. Krieger,
take him down to the med lab

323
00:15:13,996 --> 00:15:16,768
and try to find out what in
the hell's the matter with him.

324
00:15:16,793 --> 00:15:18,760
Him? What about me?

325
00:15:18,785 --> 00:15:22,144
- We know what's wrong with you.
- Yeah, foot hole.

326
00:15:22,980 --> 00:15:25,493
- Well?
- Well, it's really kind of weird.

327
00:15:25,518 --> 00:15:26,940
Uh, no shit.

328
00:15:26,965 --> 00:15:29,791
The scanner shows normal vitals
and doesn't show anything

329
00:15:29,816 --> 00:15:32,147
physically or neurologically unusual.

330
00:15:32,172 --> 00:15:34,173
No drugs in his system and...

331
00:15:34,174 --> 00:15:36,986
just what I assume is
a therapeutic level of bourbon.

332
00:15:37,011 --> 00:15:41,580
- And... no syphilis?
- No venereal disease of any kind.

333
00:15:41,605 --> 00:15:43,198
Or judgment, by the way.

334
00:15:43,199 --> 00:15:44,442
- Don't care.
- Eh.

335
00:15:44,467 --> 00:15:48,370
- How does that thing know all that?
- I know. Pretty great.

336
00:15:48,395 --> 00:15:52,257
All right, keep scanning or whatever,
and keep him down here

337
00:15:52,258 --> 00:15:53,947
until you find out
what's wrong with him.

338
00:15:53,972 --> 00:15:55,947
My therapeutic levels are low.

339
00:15:55,972 --> 00:15:58,339
And I could actually use
some sterilizing wipes.

340
00:15:58,364 --> 00:16:00,574
- I'll bet. Keep an eye on him?
- Mm-hmm.

341
00:16:05,457 --> 00:16:07,025
Uh... hello?

342
00:16:07,050 --> 00:16:10,066
Is there a reason you locked
the door from the outside?

343
00:16:10,386 --> 00:16:12,697
Krieger? Hello?

344
00:16:13,816 --> 00:16:15,582
- Super.
- Is it?

345
00:16:15,621 --> 00:16:17,533
Oh!
Jesus Christ, Archer!

346
00:16:17,558 --> 00:16:19,301
What are you doing?
You scared the shit out of me!

347
00:16:19,302 --> 00:16:21,303
- Oh, I'm sorry.
- Well...

348
00:16:21,304 --> 00:16:23,126
what'd ya expect, nerfnuts?

349
00:16:23,151 --> 00:16:24,755
It's alcohol. It's gonna hurt.

350
00:16:25,277 --> 00:16:28,377
- Well, if you think that hurt...
- Yes! Yes, I do think it hurt!

351
00:16:28,402 --> 00:16:30,549
You'd better not be wasting that.

352
00:16:30,574 --> 00:16:33,549
Um, guess it kind of depends
on how you mean.

353
00:16:33,574 --> 00:16:36,940
I mean, we've really only got
two options here, Lana.

354
00:16:36,965 --> 00:16:40,393
One is that this is all
some sort of ruse,

355
00:16:40,418 --> 00:16:42,973
and the other is
that I'm crazy.

356
00:16:43,008 --> 00:16:47,026
- You're kind of acting crazy.
- I don't think I'm acting crazy.

357
00:16:47,061 --> 00:16:51,979
- That's kind of one of the symptoms.
- Ah, the old catch-21.

358
00:16:52,004 --> 00:16:55,611
21, 22, whatever it takes.

359
00:16:55,636 --> 00:16:57,372
Ow! Shit!

360
00:16:57,373 --> 00:16:59,525
Jesus Christ, you are crazy!

361
00:16:59,526 --> 00:17:02,322
Yeah?
Would a crazy person do this?

362
00:17:02,347 --> 00:17:04,152
No, no, no, no, wait!

363
00:17:05,339 --> 00:17:06,387
Yes...

364
00:17:22,363 --> 00:17:24,543
- No, no, no, no, no, no!
- Hey, what the...

365
00:17:27,207 --> 00:17:29,271
Emergency. Med lab.

366
00:17:29,272 --> 00:17:31,768
- What emergency?
- Well, it has been almost a minute

367
00:17:31,793 --> 00:17:34,775
- since Archer got some attention.
- You're just a mess.

368
00:17:34,800 --> 00:17:38,877
- Holy shit! Look!
- Oh, my God! Come on!

369
00:17:38,902 --> 00:17:41,576
Come on, come on,
come on, come on!

370
00:17:41,601 --> 00:17:43,402
Argh!

371
00:17:47,121 --> 00:17:48,557
Come on, come on,
come on, come on,

372
00:17:48,558 --> 00:17:49,591
come on, come on,
come on, come on!

373
00:17:49,592 --> 00:17:52,477
- Why the hell is it so long?
- Space phrasing.

374
00:17:52,478 --> 00:17:53,962
- That's just how it comes!
- Twofer.

375
00:17:53,963 --> 00:17:56,066
Oh, my God,
just reset it, Dr. Science!

376
00:17:56,091 --> 00:17:58,409
Will you shut up?!

377
00:17:58,434 --> 00:18:01,675
If I mess up,
I have to start all over again!

378
00:18:03,439 --> 00:18:06,425
Sterling, stop!
Do you hear me?

379
00:18:06,426 --> 00:18:08,293
Stop it this instant!

380
00:18:08,294 --> 00:18:09,457
What are you doing?

381
00:18:11,394 --> 00:18:12,721
My frickin' tit!

382
00:18:13,862 --> 00:18:17,009
- Sterling!
- A Tennessee titty twister?

383
00:18:17,043 --> 00:18:18,503
Whoa!

384
00:18:18,675 --> 00:18:21,457
Well, how do ya like these titties?

385
00:18:24,081 --> 00:18:27,206
- Lana? Are you all right?
- I...

386
00:18:28,824 --> 00:18:29,908
I think so.

387
00:18:29,933 --> 00:18:34,363
- Ugh, my magazine's not.
- Shut up. And, Pam, Gillette...

388
00:18:35,023 --> 00:18:36,957
throw his ass in the brig!

389
00:18:38,465 --> 00:18:41,918
Yeah, well...
I guess we'll see about that!

390
00:18:44,690 --> 00:18:45,747
Huh?
Pfff. The brig.

391
00:18:45,847 --> 00:18:47,332
Like, where do they get off?

392
00:18:47,458 --> 00:18:49,690
They're the ones running around
changing clothes

393
00:18:49,715 --> 00:18:51,635
and shooting people in the neck
with darts

394
00:18:51,660 --> 00:18:54,549
and... eating
perfectly good magazines.

395
00:18:54,745 --> 00:18:56,696
You know?
I mean, that's crazy.

396
00:18:56,721 --> 00:18:58,121
I mean, right?

397
00:18:59,522 --> 00:19:01,948
- Yes, sir.
- Yeah. Thank you. Mmm.

398
00:19:03,433 --> 00:19:04,957
God, that's good.

399
00:19:05,783 --> 00:19:09,855
Wait, are... are... are you
supposed to be here?

400
00:19:11,918 --> 00:19:16,410
- No, sir.
- Huh. Now, that's disconcerting.

401
00:19:16,970 --> 00:19:18,402
Yes, sir.

402
00:19:18,427 --> 00:19:25,527
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