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00:00:00,001 --> 00:00:05,000
- Synced and corrected by Firefly -
- www.addic7ed.com -

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Previously on Doom Patrol...

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What's the Bureau of Normalcy?

4
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It's a top secret government agency,

5
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run by a bunch of demented zealots.

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They stomp out anything
they deem to be aberrations.

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Hey, it's me. Jane.

8
00:00:33,720 --> 00:00:36,958
Her brain activity's off the
charts, and yet... nothing.

9
00:00:36,992 --> 00:00:38,193
Jane's in there somewhere.

10
00:00:41,145 --> 00:00:42,647
What the hell happened here?

11
00:00:42,672 --> 00:00:43,765
Long story.

12
00:00:43,790 --> 00:00:45,220
If you're feeling homicidal urges,

13
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just give us a little
heads up, all right?

14
00:00:46,774 --> 00:00:47,801
I said, shut up.

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00:00:47,826 --> 00:00:49,781
- I was trying to protect you.
- By lying?

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00:00:49,806 --> 00:00:52,043
How did Niles get
involved with superheroes?

17
00:00:52,068 --> 00:00:53,175
Niles never said.

18
00:00:53,200 --> 00:00:54,935
You know he has his secrets.

19
00:00:54,960 --> 00:00:56,170
Niles and his secrets.

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Sounds like you and I know
two different Niles Caulders.

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- _ - From the Journal of Niles
Caulder, 4th of December, 1913.

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We've set up north on
an exploratory mission

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for the Bureau of Oddities.

24
00:02:22,664 --> 00:02:25,052
Washington doubts our
department's value,

25
00:02:25,766 --> 00:02:28,498
but I am eager to prove
what we are capable of.

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Steady on, Alistair.

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We're explorers, not mercenaries.

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You tell that to the Turks
that were just up this way

29
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about seven months ago.

30
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Only one man returned.

31
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Barely.

32
00:02:48,789 --> 00:02:51,192
You know what he claims he saw?

33
00:02:51,224 --> 00:02:52,426
Those men were hunters.

34
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We're not.

35
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If this creature exists,

36
00:02:58,099 --> 00:03:00,579
there's no reason to believe
it's gonna be of any danger to us.

37
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In fact, it might
mean us no harm at all.

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Oh, friend.

39
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Anything that can
survive this frozen hell

40
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absolutely wants to do you harm.

41
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You remind that wolf
that you're an explorer,

42
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- not a hunter.
- You saved my life.

43
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I thought I told you not to
wander away from camp without...

44
00:04:49,890 --> 00:04:50,962
Alistair!

45
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Run!

46
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No.

47
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Wait. Please.

48
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No.

49
00:05:50,572 --> 00:05:51,909
Please.

50
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Please.

51
00:06:13,067 --> 00:06:15,687
_

52
00:06:15,697 --> 00:06:18,734
Ernest, are you down there?

53
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What is it, Mother?

54
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We're out of Lean Cuisine.

55
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I no longer require Lean
Cuisine for sustenance, Mother.

56
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I maintain my physique

57
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through a high-calorie
ketogenic diet and mental focus.

58
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I need you to go to the market.

59
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What?

60
00:06:35,284 --> 00:06:36,685
Why?

61
00:06:36,719 --> 00:06:38,118
Why can't you go?

62
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I'm watching This Is Us.

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Fuck This Is Us.

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The keys are by the door.

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And don't forget to pick up
more scratchers.

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Mama!

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I'm very busy right now!

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Mom?

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Mom!

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Mom!

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Canned peaches are
on aisle five, old-timer.

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That's for my mom.

73
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That's for me.

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We know all about your
hemorrhoid cream preferences,

75
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Ernest Franklin.

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Who the fuck are you?

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Try The United States fucking
Government. Bureau of Normalcy.

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I'm familiar with your work.

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No, you're not.

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No, I'm not.

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Normally, the Bureau
operates in the shadows,

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entirely self-regulated.

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But desperate times call
for... people like you.

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People like me?

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One of our top agents, Darren Jones,

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failed to report in from assignment.

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We believe that he had an
encounter with the associates

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of a gentleman by the
name of Niles Caulder.

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We believe that a man of your... talents

90
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can locate Niles Caulder and
bring him in for questioning.

91
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Do you think you can handle that?

92
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Prepare yourself, Beard Hunter.

93
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You've been activated.

94
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Mom?

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Where are my shuriken?

96
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Check the dishwasher.

97
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I told you, they're hand-wash only!

98
00:09:34,928 --> 00:09:37,765
Mom! I need your help, please!

99
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What happened?

100
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You stuck in your costume again?

101
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It's not a costume!

102
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Fuck!

103
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Niles Caulder, I'm coming for you.

104
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Who's there?

105
00:11:04,619 --> 00:11:06,452
I am an Agent of the Oddities.

106
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I am not afraid of death.

107
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I am not afraid of death.

108
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_

109
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_

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Yes.

111
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There's absolutely
nothing wrong with her.

112
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Her brain activity's off
the charts, and yet, nothing.

113
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Jane's in there somewhere.

114
00:11:46,794 --> 00:11:48,261
So how do we pull her out?

115
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I don't know. Part of me
wishes that we could just...

116
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shrink ourselves Magic School Bus style,

117
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and get inside her head.

118
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What?

119
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I'm just marveling at
your embrace of the weird

120
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and utterly impossible.

121
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What?

122
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Cliff?

123
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Cliff?

124
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- Cliff!
- We get it, Rita.

125
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Do you?

126
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Three people are unconscious now,

127
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and you're just, what, all good?

128
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What exactly is the plan here?

129
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I have no idea.

130
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But whatever it is,
looks like it's working.

131
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Oh, really?

132
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Forgive me for having doubts,

133
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but what do we really
know about this... thing?

134
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What exactly are you?

135
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Well, I can see why
Larry is so fond of you.

136
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This never would've happened
if the Chief were still here.

137
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You're right. He's gone.

138
00:13:01,669 --> 00:13:04,877
But us standing around waiting for
these three is not gonna change that.

139
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Let's get back to work.

140
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Hello.

141
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I'm Dr. Niles Evelyn Caulder. I'm...

142
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I'm a research explorer
from the Bureau of Oddities.

143
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Please, I'm separated
from my partner. I...

144
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You know I'm wounded.
I'm not a threat to you.

145
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Please, those men up there,

146
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I'm not like them.

147
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Those men are hunters.

148
00:14:06,833 --> 00:14:08,785
I'm not a hunter.

149
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I'm a friend.

150
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I'm very cold.

151
00:14:25,785 --> 00:14:27,086
Please, could I...

152
00:14:28,655 --> 00:14:32,211
Could I move a bit closer to the fire?

153
00:14:33,227 --> 00:14:36,765
I'm not gonna survive this,
whatever your plans are.

154
00:14:39,501 --> 00:14:41,661
I just wanna get...

155
00:14:43,105 --> 00:14:44,705
a little bit warm.

156
00:14:50,035 --> 00:14:51,408
Please, stop.

157
00:14:51,433 --> 00:14:53,438
I'm sorry.

158
00:15:13,467 --> 00:15:16,003
So Danny is a talking street?

159
00:15:16,028 --> 00:15:17,927
- Yeah.
- Where everyone is gay?

160
00:15:18,573 --> 00:15:22,264
No. I don't know. It's a
place for all kinds of people.

161
00:15:23,035 --> 00:15:25,044
And it travels?

162
00:15:25,078 --> 00:15:26,514
Not "it," "they."

163
00:15:26,648 --> 00:15:28,052
Danny's genderqueer.

164
00:15:28,594 --> 00:15:30,195
And they jump, yeah.

165
00:15:30,385 --> 00:15:32,323
And "they" gave you a comic book?

166
00:15:32,355 --> 00:15:35,691
Look, when you get a comic book
from a talking street named Danny,

167
00:15:35,722 --> 00:15:39,028
it isn't just a comic book. It
has to have some kind of clue.

168
00:15:39,053 --> 00:15:40,067
Well, give it here.

169
00:15:41,563 --> 00:15:43,798
Look, anything that gets us
closer to finding the Chief,

170
00:15:43,799 --> 00:15:46,534
no matter how absurd
or obtuse or dangerous,

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we have to use it to our advantage.

172
00:15:48,169 --> 00:15:50,539
Talking streets, comic books.

173
00:15:50,573 --> 00:15:53,275
I always thought the weirdest
thing in Chief's life was us.

174
00:15:53,308 --> 00:15:55,737
That's odd. The hunk is missing.

175
00:15:56,309 --> 00:15:57,746
What?

176
00:15:57,779 --> 00:16:01,917
Cartoon hunk. The hunky muscle
man in this advertisement.

177
00:16:01,951 --> 00:16:05,688
Mmm. I must've seen this ad
a hundred times as a girl.

178
00:16:05,722 --> 00:16:08,557
There's supposed to be a man there,

179
00:16:08,590 --> 00:16:12,290
but it's empty. It's like he
just walked out of the comic book.

180
00:16:37,251 --> 00:16:38,813
Oh, yeah.

181
00:16:40,654 --> 00:16:41,867
Okay, easy.

182
00:16:41,892 --> 00:16:43,395
Here we go. Easy.

183
00:16:46,134 --> 00:16:47,134
Okay.

184
00:16:52,111 --> 00:16:53,111
Oh!

185
00:16:59,308 --> 00:17:01,042
Be smart now, Ernest.

186
00:17:01,067 --> 00:17:02,745
A little bit goes a long way.

187
00:17:08,386 --> 00:17:09,386
Mmm.

188
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From the Journal of Niles Caulder.

189
00:17:27,901 --> 00:17:31,738
I've spent weeks at the mercy
of this primitive creature.

190
00:17:32,806 --> 00:17:35,409
Finally, my strength
has started to return.

191
00:17:35,444 --> 00:17:37,621
This specimen seemingly exists

192
00:17:37,646 --> 00:17:40,457
in complete opposition
to the modern world,

193
00:17:40,482 --> 00:17:42,784
entirely removed from mankind.

194
00:17:42,816 --> 00:17:46,286
She would be the crown jewel
of the Bureau's collection.

195
00:17:46,322 --> 00:17:47,526
Oh, don't be alarmed.

196
00:17:48,157 --> 00:17:51,092
My... My leg is feeling better.

197
00:17:52,428 --> 00:17:53,827
It's feeling good, thank you.

198
00:17:54,361 --> 00:17:55,829
I'll be able to leave soon.

199
00:17:56,581 --> 00:17:58,200
I'll have to go home.

200
00:18:00,137 --> 00:18:01,175
Home...

201
00:18:02,469 --> 00:18:03,762
I'll have to go.

202
00:18:05,963 --> 00:18:07,034
Home!

203
00:18:07,921 --> 00:18:10,749
You could come with me.

204
00:18:20,125 --> 00:18:21,171
Mmm.

205
00:18:27,460 --> 00:18:29,110
My people would love to see you.

206
00:18:30,430 --> 00:18:32,368
They'd take great care of you.

207
00:18:38,246 --> 00:18:39,805
I'm never gonna leave here, am I?

208
00:18:41,611 --> 00:18:43,602
You didn't save me. You kidnapped me.

209
00:18:43,627 --> 00:18:46,426
I'm just your pet.

210
00:18:48,066 --> 00:18:49,754
I'm a plaything to you.

211
00:18:50,717 --> 00:18:52,348
That's what you think of me, isn't it?

212
00:18:54,717 --> 00:18:56,035
How dare you!

213
00:18:56,872 --> 00:18:58,707
I'm not a pet monkey!

214
00:18:59,526 --> 00:19:00,840
I'm not an animal!

215
00:19:01,496 --> 00:19:03,063
You're the animal!

216
00:19:03,399 --> 00:19:05,605
We are not animals!

217
00:19:06,467 --> 00:19:08,824
I'm not an animal.

218
00:19:14,433 --> 00:19:15,618
Stay back.

219
00:19:16,379 --> 00:19:17,816
Don't you come near me.

220
00:19:20,246 --> 00:19:22,419
You've kept me here against my will.

221
00:19:22,444 --> 00:19:24,646
You've bound my hands.

222
00:19:25,143 --> 00:19:27,677
I can't! I will not...

223
00:19:28,688 --> 00:19:32,227
These are not animals left to rot.

224
00:19:32,928 --> 00:19:34,212
They are men.

225
00:19:36,290 --> 00:19:37,977
They deserve a proper burial.

226
00:19:38,632 --> 00:19:40,203
It's the right...

227
00:19:41,602 --> 00:19:43,954
It's the Christian thing to do.

228
00:20:29,279 --> 00:20:30,397
My God.

229
00:20:31,453 --> 00:20:33,022
What is this place?

230
00:20:39,538 --> 00:20:41,514
Oh God, this is remarkable.

231
00:20:46,870 --> 00:20:49,706
There appears to be even
more to this strange creature

232
00:20:49,736 --> 00:20:51,238
than I'd originally assumed.

233
00:20:52,042 --> 00:20:54,708
I'd always suspected that
my captor was primitive,

234
00:20:54,744 --> 00:20:56,966
but I never considered
what that truly meant.

235
00:20:57,646 --> 00:20:59,179
This ancient culture,

236
00:20:59,216 --> 00:21:02,315
tens of thousands of years
old by my estimation,

237
00:21:02,351 --> 00:21:04,440
was once a proud tribe.

238
00:21:05,388 --> 00:21:08,213
But one by one, they faded away.

239
00:21:10,123 --> 00:21:11,175
Except...

240
00:21:15,796 --> 00:21:17,534
Unless my eyes deceived me,

241
00:21:17,565 --> 00:21:21,283
my captor had existed within
this tribe for generations.

242
00:21:21,803 --> 00:21:22,994
Every era.

243
00:21:24,371 --> 00:21:25,875
The question was, how?

244
00:21:27,026 --> 00:21:28,203
Eternal life.

245
00:21:28,909 --> 00:21:31,304
Something I never before
considered possible.

246
00:21:31,329 --> 00:21:33,598
Something I struggled to comprehend.

247
00:21:33,814 --> 00:21:35,990
My mind raced with questions,

248
00:21:36,512 --> 00:21:38,506
but I could not find my voice.

249
00:21:40,590 --> 00:21:42,545
I could only bear witness,

250
00:21:43,192 --> 00:21:44,873
and behold her.

251
00:22:33,339 --> 00:22:34,808
Oyewah.

252
00:22:44,057 --> 00:22:45,346
Oyewah.

253
00:22:48,823 --> 00:22:50,793
Finally, I began to understand

254
00:22:50,824 --> 00:22:53,003
the nature of the creature I had found.

255
00:23:07,238 --> 00:23:08,354
Mmm.

256
00:23:42,011 --> 00:23:44,659
And then, in a single moment...

257
00:23:47,002 --> 00:23:49,106
Oyewah.

258
00:23:52,655 --> 00:23:56,955
I realized that I understood
absolutely nothing at all.

259
00:24:12,088 --> 00:24:13,527
It's really you!

260
00:24:14,702 --> 00:24:15,702
Cyborg!

261
00:24:15,727 --> 00:24:18,975
Yes, yes, the famous Cyborg. Incredible.

262
00:24:19,000 --> 00:24:21,648
- And you are?
- Looking for one Niles Caulder.

263
00:24:22,492 --> 00:24:23,686
Missing.

264
00:24:23,687 --> 00:24:24,918
How do you know Niles Caulder?

265
00:24:24,919 --> 00:24:27,255
Oh, I know all about Niles Caulder.

266
00:24:27,287 --> 00:24:29,659
I know how the Bureau of
Normalcy is looking for him.

267
00:24:29,689 --> 00:24:31,494
I know about his band of freaks,

268
00:24:31,525 --> 00:24:33,727
the race car driver, the basket case,

269
00:24:33,763 --> 00:24:37,343
the test pilot, the Hollywood actress...

270
00:24:37,832 --> 00:24:39,066
And so much more.

271
00:24:39,102 --> 00:24:41,534
I'm sorry. Who are you, again?

272
00:24:41,559 --> 00:24:44,061
Well, I'm known by many names.

273
00:24:44,104 --> 00:24:47,228
In Spain, they call me
El Cazador de Barba.

274
00:24:48,002 --> 00:24:51,345
My psyche profile, they
call me a pogonophile.

275
00:24:51,380 --> 00:24:55,083
But most commonly, those
who dare speak my name

276
00:24:56,367 --> 00:24:57,817
call me the Beard Hunter.

277
00:25:04,513 --> 00:25:06,237
Okay. The Beard Hunter.

278
00:25:07,130 --> 00:25:09,164
So the Bureau of Normalcy hired...

279
00:25:09,698 --> 00:25:11,210
the Beard Hunter.

280
00:25:11,828 --> 00:25:13,204
Okay, what else do we need to know?

281
00:25:13,228 --> 00:25:15,871
If you're the Beard Hunter,
why don't you have a beard?

282
00:25:15,902 --> 00:25:16,970
Hormone disorder.

283
00:25:17,005 --> 00:25:18,317
Man, how do you know Niles Caulder?

284
00:25:18,341 --> 00:25:20,543
I consumed Niles's essence.

285
00:25:21,509 --> 00:25:24,152
Fragments of his facial hair.

286
00:25:24,739 --> 00:25:25,739
Still fresh.

287
00:25:25,881 --> 00:25:27,427
- Ugh.
- Wait. Hold up.

288
00:25:28,193 --> 00:25:29,591
"Consumed his essence"?

289
00:25:31,423 --> 00:25:32,625
You didn't...

290
00:25:32,650 --> 00:25:33,883
In the bathroom,

291
00:25:34,835 --> 00:25:36,972
did you eat Niles's drain scum?

292
00:25:37,094 --> 00:25:38,606
- Ugh.
- Why?

293
00:25:39,893 --> 00:25:41,441
What's a soggy piece of hair
got to do with the Chief?

294
00:25:41,465 --> 00:25:44,061
What's hair got to do with the Chief?

295
00:25:51,473 --> 00:25:52,872
You better back your ass up.

296
00:25:52,909 --> 00:25:55,842
I'm sure you care very much
about finding the Chief.

297
00:25:55,878 --> 00:25:56,878
We all do.

298
00:25:56,903 --> 00:26:02,056
But I'm not sure he can help you
with whatever is wrong with you.

299
00:26:02,617 --> 00:26:03,642
Help me?

300
00:26:06,021 --> 00:26:08,111
You really don't know
him at all, do you?

301
00:26:08,429 --> 00:26:12,603
You think finding Niles will
rescue you from your pathetic lives,

302
00:26:12,628 --> 00:26:17,167
but Niles Caulder is not the
man he's led you to believe.

303
00:26:17,198 --> 00:26:19,857
Niles Caulder is not your savior.

304
00:26:20,357 --> 00:26:21,536
He's a false god.

305
00:26:22,303 --> 00:26:25,177
Finding him will change nothing.

306
00:26:26,373 --> 00:26:30,170
You'll still be nothing more
than a broken football star

307
00:26:31,410 --> 00:26:33,179
and a washed-up actress.

308
00:26:33,180 --> 00:26:34,814
Then just tell me why
we should be listening

309
00:26:34,815 --> 00:26:38,255
to this crazy-ass lunatic we just
found passed out in the bathroom?

310
00:26:38,285 --> 00:26:40,120
'Cause I know the truth
about Niles Caulder,

311
00:26:40,121 --> 00:26:41,759
and I know how to find him.

312
00:26:42,390 --> 00:26:46,062
His beard calls out to me
from across time and space.

313
00:26:46,715 --> 00:26:48,163
I can hear its siren song.

314
00:26:49,098 --> 00:26:50,273
That's my superpower.

315
00:26:50,900 --> 00:26:52,635
My je ne sais quoi.

316
00:26:53,870 --> 00:26:56,135
I can trace a man's
beard anywhere it is,

317
00:26:56,970 --> 00:26:58,573
anywhere it has been.

318
00:26:58,607 --> 00:26:59,607
Okay.

319
00:27:18,061 --> 00:27:20,311
Okay, I'm done.

320
00:27:23,098 --> 00:27:26,911
Never underestimate
the power of the beard.

321
00:27:29,536 --> 00:27:33,043
From the journal of
Niles Caulder, date unknown.

322
00:27:33,074 --> 00:27:35,823
After the funeral, I choose to remain

323
00:27:35,848 --> 00:27:38,264
and study the creature
in her natural habitat.

324
00:27:38,582 --> 00:27:42,217
She wields a psychic power
with incredible potential.

325
00:27:42,249 --> 00:27:45,251
What other wonders could
she possibly unlock?

326
00:27:45,785 --> 00:27:47,094
Immortality.

327
00:27:47,755 --> 00:27:49,407
A bridge to the unknown.

328
00:27:49,925 --> 00:27:51,861
She is the ultimate discovery.

329
00:27:52,294 --> 00:27:56,429
She represents all the
Bureau of Oddities stands for.

330
00:27:59,869 --> 00:28:01,169
- Horkon.
- Horkon?

331
00:28:01,203 --> 00:28:02,858
- That's a new one.
- Horkon laka.

332
00:28:03,458 --> 00:28:04,882
- Horkon?
- Horkon.

333
00:28:12,574 --> 00:28:13,661
After that day,

334
00:28:14,681 --> 00:28:16,194
I fell deathly ill.

335
00:28:46,015 --> 00:28:47,201
Stay back.

336
00:28:47,917 --> 00:28:49,224
I'm not well.

337
00:29:36,939 --> 00:29:39,038
Were if not for each other,

338
00:29:39,063 --> 00:29:40,510
we would have perished.

339
00:29:54,260 --> 00:29:55,510
Oyewah.

340
00:29:59,518 --> 00:30:00,752
Oyewah.

341
00:30:31,651 --> 00:30:33,828
You are remarkable.

342
00:30:56,312 --> 00:30:59,015
All right, that gentleman
is clearly a nut muffin,

343
00:30:59,045 --> 00:31:01,617
but I think we should try to use him.

344
00:31:01,650 --> 00:31:04,919
If he knows where the
Chief is, that can help us.

345
00:31:04,953 --> 00:31:06,915
Maybe we can co-star with him.

346
00:31:08,110 --> 00:31:09,812
You mean "team-up"?

347
00:31:09,837 --> 00:31:10,986
Yes, that.

348
00:31:12,996 --> 00:31:15,630
If it helps us find the Chief,
we have to follow it.

349
00:31:15,662 --> 00:31:17,976
That's what you said,
right? No matter what.

350
00:31:34,442 --> 00:31:35,449
Ah!

351
00:31:35,450 --> 00:31:37,044
All right, you're right, um...

352
00:31:38,553 --> 00:31:40,005
- Okay, here's the plan.
- Mmm.

353
00:31:41,945 --> 00:31:43,812
- We just let him go.
- What?

354
00:31:43,927 --> 00:31:46,696
Something tells me this Beard Hunter
guy isn't much of a team player.

355
00:31:46,727 --> 00:31:50,247
But we can track him, using this.

356
00:31:54,102 --> 00:31:56,139
Impressive doohickey, Victor.

357
00:31:56,176 --> 00:31:58,479
But how are we supposed to track him?

358
00:32:02,342 --> 00:32:04,947
Hey! He hasn't told you yet, has he?

359
00:32:04,978 --> 00:32:06,103
What's wrong with him?

360
00:32:06,128 --> 00:32:08,961
He's been lying to all of
you! Haven't you, Victor?

361
00:32:08,986 --> 00:32:10,735
Okay, Beard Hunter,
you're, like, a nine.

362
00:32:10,760 --> 00:32:12,597
I'm gonna need you to take
it down to, like, a four.

363
00:32:12,621 --> 00:32:15,421
It's too late, Cyborg. I consumed
a sample of your essence.

364
00:32:15,422 --> 00:32:16,480
I'm inside your head now.

365
00:32:16,505 --> 00:32:19,011
Facial hair connects me to
the secrets of the universe.

366
00:32:19,036 --> 00:32:20,538
It's the ultimate flavor savor.

367
00:32:20,563 --> 00:32:22,665
All the memories, secrets, sandwiches...

368
00:32:22,698 --> 00:32:25,101
A man's beard witnesses all things.

369
00:32:25,131 --> 00:32:26,900
And only I can decode the language.

370
00:32:26,937 --> 00:32:28,809
You wet the bed until
you were six years old.

371
00:32:28,834 --> 00:32:30,948
You killed your mother when you were 18.

372
00:32:30,973 --> 00:32:33,775
When you were little, you
called her "Cotton Candy,"

373
00:32:33,806 --> 00:32:35,611
and she called you...

374
00:32:38,891 --> 00:32:40,102
I know it all!

375
00:32:40,127 --> 00:32:42,415
Your facial hair connects me
directly to the brain stem.

376
00:32:42,440 --> 00:32:43,455
Sure.

377
00:32:50,719 --> 00:32:51,970
Ha!

378
00:32:52,009 --> 00:32:53,009
Whoo!

379
00:33:00,333 --> 00:33:01,705
Just hit him already!

380
00:33:01,736 --> 00:33:03,840
Tell me, Cyborg. Why would
a man like Niles Caulder

381
00:33:03,871 --> 00:33:06,408
choose to live with a
gallery of rejects like her?

382
00:33:06,409 --> 00:33:07,939
And why would he want you to join them?

383
00:33:10,178 --> 00:33:11,977
Grid, diagnostic check.

384
00:33:11,978 --> 00:33:13,014
What's up with my arm cannon?

385
00:33:13,015 --> 00:33:14,484
Unknown threat detected.

386
00:33:14,515 --> 00:33:16,516
Host has been compromised.

387
00:33:16,553 --> 00:33:18,285
- What?
- Well, well, well...

388
00:33:18,321 --> 00:33:20,621
Looks like I'm not the
only one inside your head.

389
00:33:20,657 --> 00:33:22,667
Initiating total system control.

390
00:33:22,692 --> 00:33:23,816
What is he talking about?

391
00:33:23,841 --> 00:33:25,494
That's what you
were told, right, Cyborg?

392
00:33:25,495 --> 00:33:27,728
The search for Niles Caulder
would destroy you all.

393
00:33:27,764 --> 00:33:30,011
- Just shut up!
- Victor, what are you doing?

394
00:33:30,036 --> 00:33:32,509
- Grid.
- Weapons systems have been activated.

395
00:33:32,534 --> 00:33:33,900
Grid, deactivate cannon.

396
00:33:33,936 --> 00:33:35,602
- Here we go.
- I repeat...

397
00:33:45,380 --> 00:33:47,314
What on Earth is wrong with you?

398
00:33:47,339 --> 00:33:48,859
There's nothing wrong with me.

399
00:33:53,780 --> 00:33:54,884
Beard Hunter!

400
00:33:55,627 --> 00:33:56,994
Just admit it.

401
00:33:57,226 --> 00:33:59,294
You'll never find the Chief.

402
00:33:59,328 --> 00:34:00,630
You don't want to.

403
00:34:00,661 --> 00:34:03,532
You're afraid of what you'll
find if you keep looking.

404
00:34:03,533 --> 00:34:04,998
You have no idea what
you're talking about.

405
00:34:04,999 --> 00:34:08,236
Actually, I've seen who you
and Niles Caulder really are.

406
00:34:08,271 --> 00:34:09,348
And the truth is...

407
00:34:12,274 --> 00:34:13,841
You're not gonna like the truth.

408
00:34:15,991 --> 00:34:16,991
Oh.

409
00:34:17,016 --> 00:34:18,216
Here he comes.

410
00:34:23,421 --> 00:34:24,756
Grid.

411
00:34:24,781 --> 00:34:25,948
Stand down.

412
00:34:26,187 --> 00:34:27,321
I got this.

413
00:34:27,355 --> 00:34:28,690
Host has been compromised.

414
00:34:28,723 --> 00:34:31,027
System control has
been deemed necessary.

415
00:34:31,060 --> 00:34:33,906
Listen to the little
voice in your head, Cyborg.

416
00:34:33,931 --> 00:34:35,203
You're not in control.

417
00:34:35,228 --> 00:34:36,540
Target acquired.

418
00:34:36,564 --> 00:34:38,442
- Lethal force activated.
- Grid, stop!

419
00:34:38,466 --> 00:34:40,201
- T-minus five...
- Stop now!

420
00:34:40,234 --> 00:34:42,471
- Careful!
- ... four, three, two...

421
00:34:42,504 --> 00:34:45,141
Stop!

422
00:34:48,302 --> 00:34:49,936
You could have killed them!

423
00:34:49,961 --> 00:34:51,744
Victor, shut it down!

424
00:34:51,745 --> 00:34:53,815
- I can't.
- "I can't."

425
00:34:53,848 --> 00:34:54,917
- Victor?
- Victor?

426
00:34:54,949 --> 00:34:57,554
Voice Command.
Activate emergency shutdown.

427
00:34:57,585 --> 00:34:59,321
Code word, "Elinore."

428
00:35:01,257 --> 00:35:02,257
Get out of here.

429
00:35:02,290 --> 00:35:03,515
- I'm sorry?
- Go!

430
00:35:04,625 --> 00:35:06,694
Look at me. Look at my face.

431
00:35:06,728 --> 00:35:08,848
I want you to always remember this.

432
00:35:08,873 --> 00:35:10,241
Ernest Franklin,

433
00:35:10,266 --> 00:35:12,435
the man who defeated Cyborg.

434
00:35:14,536 --> 00:35:17,364
I wonder, who will play me in the movie?

435
00:35:18,742 --> 00:35:20,223
It's okay. Just let him go.

436
00:35:45,196 --> 00:35:46,611
Spring has sprung,

437
00:35:47,020 --> 00:35:48,376
and life is returning.

438
00:35:48,904 --> 00:35:51,604
I have chosen to remain
here in the north.

439
00:36:03,786 --> 00:36:06,487
This is no longer a journey
of scientific discovery

440
00:36:06,520 --> 00:36:08,598
but an exploration of something deeper.

441
00:36:09,424 --> 00:36:11,693
Something within myself.

442
00:36:12,527 --> 00:36:14,362
There is nothing but the hunt,

443
00:36:14,395 --> 00:36:16,134
nothing but the thrill

444
00:36:16,903 --> 00:36:17,931
and peril

445
00:36:19,691 --> 00:36:20,947
of survival.

446
00:36:23,741 --> 00:36:25,338
It's liberating.

447
00:36:50,199 --> 00:36:51,567
Days pass into months.

448
00:36:51,600 --> 00:36:53,469
Months pass into years.

449
00:36:53,502 --> 00:36:55,768
My old life fades.

450
00:36:56,163 --> 00:36:58,448
My new life feels

451
00:36:59,894 --> 00:37:00,964
eternal.

452
00:37:03,379 --> 00:37:08,283
# I'll home to me parents
confess what I've done #

453
00:37:08,317 --> 00:37:13,154
# And ask them to pardon
their prodigal son #

454
00:37:13,190 --> 00:37:18,190
# And when they've caressed
me as ofttimes before #

455
00:37:18,541 --> 00:37:25,441
# I never will play
the wild rover no more #

456
00:37:25,466 --> 00:37:29,214
# And it's no, nay, never #

457
00:37:29,971 --> 00:37:32,643
# No, nay, never no more #

458
00:37:33,507 --> 00:37:36,807
# Will I play the wild rover #

459
00:37:37,745 --> 00:37:40,838
# No never no more #

460
00:37:49,524 --> 00:37:50,661
Hello, old friend.

461
00:37:53,694 --> 00:37:56,252
I can't believe you're
alive after all this time.

462
00:37:58,600 --> 00:38:00,370
Did you know that I
went to your funeral?

463
00:38:02,093 --> 00:38:03,825
Hmm.

464
00:38:05,325 --> 00:38:06,388
Niles, I'm sorry.

465
00:38:07,454 --> 00:38:08,814
I shouldn't have left you up here.

466
00:38:09,045 --> 00:38:12,175
If anyone should be asking
forgiveness, Alistair, it's me.

467
00:38:13,248 --> 00:38:14,425
Those scars.

468
00:38:16,255 --> 00:38:17,825
In fact, I should be thanking you.

469
00:38:18,953 --> 00:38:20,998
I finally found where I belong.

470
00:38:24,326 --> 00:38:26,962
You can't possibly
plan on staying out here.

471
00:38:27,111 --> 00:38:29,575
Ah, the Bureau will
manage fine without me.

472
00:38:29,964 --> 00:38:31,967
You've been gone a long time, Niles.

473
00:38:32,701 --> 00:38:34,435
The world's changed.

474
00:38:34,469 --> 00:38:35,469
We're at war.

475
00:38:35,470 --> 00:38:36,519
A Great War.

476
00:38:37,793 --> 00:38:39,230
Worst anyone's ever seen.

477
00:38:39,708 --> 00:38:40,775
I didn't know.

478
00:38:41,509 --> 00:38:42,777
We had no choice.

479
00:38:42,810 --> 00:38:45,145
Organization had to change.

480
00:38:45,179 --> 00:38:46,848
Mission had to evolve.

481
00:38:46,882 --> 00:38:49,652
Odd is out. Normal is in.

482
00:38:49,685 --> 00:38:50,770
What does that mean?

483
00:38:51,863 --> 00:38:52,872
The mission.

484
00:38:53,955 --> 00:38:56,191
We still seek out
that which is abnormal,

485
00:38:57,007 --> 00:38:58,649
only now we exterminate.

486
00:39:03,565 --> 00:39:04,859
You've been gone, Niles.

487
00:39:05,600 --> 00:39:07,670
The world no longer needs explorers.

488
00:39:07,703 --> 00:39:09,952
The world always needs explorers.

489
00:39:17,245 --> 00:39:19,537
Tell me, how did you do it,
survive out here?

490
00:39:21,213 --> 00:39:22,381
I was fortunate.

491
00:39:24,685 --> 00:39:27,223
I found the bodies of those
two missing hunters.

492
00:39:27,257 --> 00:39:30,165
They had equipment, gear,
enough for me to survive.

493
00:39:30,866 --> 00:39:32,034
I foraged.

494
00:39:32,059 --> 00:39:33,392
And I learned to hunt.

495
00:39:36,143 --> 00:39:37,597
Winters were difficult.

496
00:39:38,117 --> 00:39:39,686
I managed to find shelter.

497
00:39:39,711 --> 00:39:42,526
Well, I sure had the wrong
impression of you, Niles Caulder.

498
00:39:47,042 --> 00:39:48,999
Your hairy little girlfriend.

499
00:39:51,547 --> 00:39:55,175
She didn't have anything to do with
your miraculous survival, did she?

500
00:39:56,551 --> 00:39:57,730
Don't deny it.

501
00:39:58,487 --> 00:39:59,566
I've seen her.

502
00:40:00,355 --> 00:40:01,613
I've been tracking her.

503
00:40:02,524 --> 00:40:03,626
She's good.

504
00:40:04,859 --> 00:40:06,308
Haven't found her nest.

505
00:40:10,266 --> 00:40:11,465
Why don't you show me?

506
00:40:17,571 --> 00:40:19,238
What the hell happened back there?

507
00:40:20,035 --> 00:40:21,202
Just a glitch.

508
00:40:21,408 --> 00:40:22,565
Victor.

509
00:40:23,623 --> 00:40:24,782
Something's wrong.

510
00:40:27,942 --> 00:40:28,971
With me.

511
00:40:30,719 --> 00:40:32,441
Ever since my reset button got pushed,

512
00:40:33,087 --> 00:40:34,582
something's been wrong in my system.

513
00:40:35,656 --> 00:40:37,027
And it's getting worse.

514
00:40:37,058 --> 00:40:38,695
Did you ask your father for help?

515
00:40:39,262 --> 00:40:40,498
I can't trust my dad.

516
00:40:40,594 --> 00:40:41,928
If I ask him for help, he would just

517
00:40:41,929 --> 00:40:44,135
take control of my whole
system and never let go.

518
00:40:44,160 --> 00:40:45,660
He's not like Niles.

519
00:40:45,801 --> 00:40:46,916
He's, um...

520
00:40:48,795 --> 00:40:50,435
I gotta handle this
whole thing on my own.

521
00:40:52,074 --> 00:40:54,877
What are you going to do about it, then?

522
00:40:54,911 --> 00:40:57,379
We can't keep blowing up
the mansion every other day.

523
00:40:57,411 --> 00:40:58,449
I can fix it.

524
00:40:59,547 --> 00:41:00,590
I promise.

525
00:41:01,074 --> 00:41:02,182
But don't tell anyone yet.

526
00:41:02,683 --> 00:41:03,852
They rest of the team can't know.

527
00:41:03,853 --> 00:41:05,373
They'll worry I'm turning into that...

528
00:41:05,588 --> 00:41:07,532
psychopath in Jane's painting.

529
00:41:09,924 --> 00:41:12,961
What are the rest of us
supposed to do in the meantime?

530
00:41:14,104 --> 00:41:15,192
We need you.

531
00:41:15,217 --> 00:41:16,494
We need the Chief.

532
00:41:17,598 --> 00:41:19,159
As ridiculous as it sounds,

533
00:41:19,868 --> 00:41:21,303
our best chance of finding him just

534
00:41:21,304 --> 00:41:23,229
kicked my ass with some beard magic.

535
00:41:25,831 --> 00:41:27,542
Thank goodness I was able to stick him

536
00:41:27,576 --> 00:41:32,017
with that tracking doohickey
thing of yours before he got away.

537
00:41:32,209 --> 00:41:33,377
You're kidding.

538
00:41:33,402 --> 00:41:34,431
Mmm.

539
00:41:34,456 --> 00:41:36,926
Rita Farr, you're amazing!

540
00:41:37,618 --> 00:41:38,786
Fix yourself up quick.

541
00:41:38,819 --> 00:41:40,190
Once you're back online,

542
00:41:40,215 --> 00:41:42,717
we'll track down the
Beard Hunter together.

543
00:41:43,188 --> 00:41:44,880
Thank you.

544
00:41:52,241 --> 00:41:53,412
Welcome back, Jane.

545
00:41:55,798 --> 00:41:56,973
Give her some room.

546
00:41:59,975 --> 00:42:01,479
What the hell happened here?

547
00:42:03,323 --> 00:42:04,479
Long story.

548
00:42:12,432 --> 00:42:13,650
What happened in there?

549
00:42:16,299 --> 00:42:17,892
It's not my story to tell.

550
00:42:20,046 --> 00:42:21,397
I get it.

551
00:42:30,389 --> 00:42:31,458
Fortunate.

552
00:42:31,641 --> 00:42:34,375
That monster you and I
were after all these years

553
00:42:34,400 --> 00:42:37,700
turned out to be nothing more
than a hairy little troll.

554
00:42:40,516 --> 00:42:42,049
After last time,

555
00:42:42,083 --> 00:42:45,286
I traveled north with half
a dozen men for protection.

556
00:42:49,891 --> 00:42:51,232
Seems silly now.

557
00:42:52,995 --> 00:42:54,114
How did you find her?

558
00:42:55,321 --> 00:42:56,453
She found me.

559
00:42:58,199 --> 00:43:00,328
Bureau will give me
an award for this one.

560
00:43:01,938 --> 00:43:02,970
Both of us.

561
00:43:04,233 --> 00:43:05,273
Did you hear that?

562
00:43:06,540 --> 00:43:07,777
Hear what?

563
00:43:07,808 --> 00:43:09,477
I believe the word is...

564
00:43:10,238 --> 00:43:11,552
"Horkon."

565
00:43:19,821 --> 00:43:21,824
I'm not the man you remember.

566
00:43:21,857 --> 00:43:23,091
Help me!

567
00:43:23,116 --> 00:43:25,500
- No one can know about her.
- Ah!

568
00:43:25,525 --> 00:43:28,625
She's my secret to
protect from the world.

569
00:43:28,650 --> 00:43:29,650
Help!

570
00:43:38,755 --> 00:43:39,953
Oyewah.

571
00:44:39,435 --> 00:44:42,145
My journey to the north
was fraught with peril.

572
00:44:42,621 --> 00:44:44,215
It came at a great cost.

573
00:44:45,641 --> 00:44:48,629
But I'm pleased to report
to the gentlemen of the Bureau that,

574
00:44:49,944 --> 00:44:53,105
whilst my experience was unique,

575
00:44:54,016 --> 00:44:55,918
there is nothing odd to report.

576
00:44:57,051 --> 00:44:58,984
There is no monster to speak of.

577
00:45:02,056 --> 00:45:03,926
I was alone for many years.

578
00:45:05,822 --> 00:45:07,813
But, in that time,
I did make a discovery.

579
00:45:09,464 --> 00:45:13,064
I discovered the strength
inside myself to survive

580
00:45:14,804 --> 00:45:16,404
and to outwit

581
00:45:17,326 --> 00:45:18,818
and outlast

582
00:45:19,708 --> 00:45:23,146
whatever true monsters
this world has to offer.

583
00:45:27,338 --> 00:45:28,380
Thank you.

584
00:45:50,574 --> 00:45:53,274
Well, what do you know? Even
I discovered something today.

585
00:45:53,308 --> 00:45:55,876
Didn't know you've been
eavesdropping on my memories.

586
00:45:55,877 --> 00:45:56,977
Haven't you noticed?

587
00:45:56,978 --> 00:46:00,083
I'm crafting a story piece by piece.

588
00:46:00,114 --> 00:46:02,169
"The Search for the Chief." This...

589
00:46:02,984 --> 00:46:06,115
unexpected wet dream of yours,

590
00:46:06,987 --> 00:46:09,190
this is a very important chapter.

591
00:46:09,223 --> 00:46:12,732
The day Niles Caulder changed forever.

592
00:46:13,261 --> 00:46:14,763
Don't know what you're talking about.

593
00:46:14,795 --> 00:46:15,930
Oh, don't you?

594
00:46:16,864 --> 00:46:17,965
Well, what did we learn?

595
00:46:18,560 --> 00:46:20,161
You murdered your friend

596
00:46:20,446 --> 00:46:23,791
and left your dream girl
behind, all for what?

597
00:46:24,810 --> 00:46:25,910
True love?

598
00:46:29,944 --> 00:46:31,233
More secrets.

599
00:46:32,647 --> 00:46:33,749
Hmm.

600
00:46:34,181 --> 00:46:36,917
More layers to the banana, unappealing.

601
00:46:38,792 --> 00:46:42,195
Secrets have a cost. Look
at what they've cost you.

602
00:46:43,692 --> 00:46:47,703
Look at what the search
for you has cost them,

603
00:46:48,129 --> 00:46:51,266
your band of bargain-bin action figures.

604
00:46:51,299 --> 00:46:53,251
They're stronger than you think.

605
00:46:53,252 --> 00:46:57,540
I'm counting on it.
But you and I both know,

606
00:46:57,574 --> 00:47:00,310
there's no way they all
make it to the finish line.

607
00:47:04,480 --> 00:47:07,801
You've always been a man
comfortable with compromise, Niles.

608
00:47:07,826 --> 00:47:10,853
I mean, after all, you fell
in love with a Canadian.

609
00:47:10,886 --> 00:47:12,265
Let's play a game.

610
00:47:13,812 --> 00:47:15,281
Answer one question,

611
00:47:15,687 --> 00:47:16,959
and all this goes away.

612
00:47:18,792 --> 00:47:20,062
You go home.

613
00:47:20,233 --> 00:47:22,578
Yes, your precious family will survive.

614
00:47:23,931 --> 00:47:26,268
There'll be chocolate cake, balloons.

615
00:47:26,706 --> 00:47:28,337
Just answer one question.

616
00:47:31,007 --> 00:47:34,212
Where is the girl?

617
00:47:34,808 --> 00:47:36,712
I don't know what you mean.

618
00:47:37,088 --> 00:47:39,260
That's what all this has
been about, hasn't it?

619
00:47:40,681 --> 00:47:41,884
All this time.

620
00:47:42,237 --> 00:47:46,917
Your foolish quest to live
forever. All to keep her safe.

621
00:47:47,190 --> 00:47:48,345
You're wrong.

622
00:47:50,426 --> 00:47:53,672
You and I have been doing this
dance for a long time, Niles.

623
00:47:53,697 --> 00:47:55,853
I don't know how, and I don't know why,

624
00:47:55,878 --> 00:47:57,056
but, somehow,

625
00:47:57,833 --> 00:48:01,362
you've managed to keep a hairy
little secret away from me,

626
00:48:01,387 --> 00:48:02,598
and I want the truth.

627
00:48:03,627 --> 00:48:04,797
Where is she?

628
00:48:07,042 --> 00:48:08,212
Tell me!

629
00:48:08,643 --> 00:48:10,846
Think about what will happen
to them if you don't...

630
00:48:10,871 --> 00:48:11,875
No.

631
00:48:13,516 --> 00:48:18,516
No. I don't care what you do to them.

632
00:48:18,788 --> 00:48:22,588
I will never give you the
satisfaction of breaking me.

633
00:48:24,393 --> 00:48:26,093
Now, that's the Niles
Caulder that I know.

634
00:48:37,582 --> 00:48:44,092
_

635
00:48:48,516 --> 00:48:51,085
Hey, Mama, it's Ernest.

636
00:48:51,118 --> 00:48:52,587
My mission was a huge success,

637
00:48:52,620 --> 00:48:54,935
I guess I'm a legit supervillain now.

638
00:48:54,960 --> 00:48:57,631
Anyway, been tracking Niles
Caulder's beard here for days,

639
00:48:57,656 --> 00:49:00,194
but I'm getting closer. I can smell it.

640
00:49:00,228 --> 00:49:01,773
All right, be home soon.

641
00:49:01,797 --> 00:49:04,766
Hi, Ernie. Sorry I missed your call.

642
00:49:04,799 --> 00:49:08,536
So exciting about the beard-hair thing.

643
00:49:08,569 --> 00:49:10,571
Hope you're making lots of friends.

644
00:49:10,605 --> 00:49:13,274
Anyway, I love you. Come home soon.

645
00:49:13,308 --> 00:49:15,337
Also, I need the car back.

646
00:49:19,593 --> 00:49:20,792
Finally.

647
00:49:26,221 --> 00:49:28,670
Oh, hello, there.

648
00:49:29,257 --> 00:49:30,287
Who are you?

649
00:49:30,963 --> 00:49:32,571
Have you come to play with me?

650
00:49:33,502 --> 00:49:35,727
I like your costume.

651
00:49:50,083 --> 00:49:55,083
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