1 00:00:04,851 --> 00:00:06,354 First order of business... 2 00:00:06,356 --> 00:00:08,305 another foot was found in the parking lot. 3 00:00:08,306 --> 00:00:11,303 Wow. It's so weird seeing you as the manager. 4 00:00:11,328 --> 00:00:13,243 It's like that one time my math teacher 5 00:00:13,245 --> 00:00:15,068 became my stepdad for a little bit. 6 00:00:15,093 --> 00:00:16,512 Like, what? 7 00:00:16,537 --> 00:00:18,414 It's a big change. Must be weird. 8 00:00:18,500 --> 00:00:21,280 Anyway, this foot had the number eight written on it, 9 00:00:21,305 --> 00:00:23,106 which is concerning because we've only found 10 00:00:23,108 --> 00:00:24,907 two other feet, so keep your eyes open. 11 00:00:24,908 --> 00:00:26,710 Sorry. Sorry I'm late. 12 00:00:26,712 --> 00:00:28,529 The baby was throwing up all night, 13 00:00:28,554 --> 00:00:30,714 but the doctor said it's probably 'cause I just gave her 14 00:00:30,716 --> 00:00:33,417 part of my buffalo chicken wrap, you know? 15 00:00:33,419 --> 00:00:35,919 Okay, uh, let's get down to business. 16 00:00:35,921 --> 00:00:37,382 - Uh, Glenn? - Mm-hmm. 17 00:00:37,407 --> 00:00:39,541 Yeah. You're not manager anymore. 18 00:00:40,342 --> 00:00:42,993 Oh. Oh, my gosh! I'm so sorry. 19 00:00:42,995 --> 00:00:45,429 After 30 years, it's just... it's muscle memory. 20 00:00:45,431 --> 00:00:46,663 Of course. Yeah. 21 00:00:46,665 --> 00:00:48,872 Okay, I'm gonna go take my seat and... 22 00:00:48,897 --> 00:00:50,600 Oh, you can read my announcements. 23 00:00:50,602 --> 00:00:52,803 Oh, no, I wrote up my own announcements... I'm good. 24 00:00:52,805 --> 00:00:54,771 There's some real goodies in here. 25 00:00:54,773 --> 00:00:56,373 They're gonna eat it up. Trust me. 26 00:00:56,381 --> 00:00:57,396 Go ahead. Read. 27 00:01:00,114 --> 00:01:04,715 "So I bet you're wondering why there are so many cops in the parking lot." 28 00:01:04,842 --> 00:01:08,007 "Let's just say there's a mystery afoot." 29 00:01:09,390 --> 00:01:14,410 credits 30 00:01:15,511 --> 00:01:17,090 - Hey boss. - Hey. 31 00:01:17,129 --> 00:01:20,465 Little office-warming gift. Got it in the Garden Center. 32 00:01:20,467 --> 00:01:23,051 I'm not sure what it is. The tag just said, "Medium Plant." 33 00:01:23,076 --> 00:01:24,925 It's a large plant that didn't grow. 34 00:01:24,970 --> 00:01:27,089 How cool is this? 35 00:01:27,091 --> 00:01:28,286 It's very cool. 36 00:01:28,287 --> 00:01:30,943 That's it? You have your own office now. 37 00:01:30,945 --> 00:01:32,394 You've made it. How are you not ecstatic? 38 00:01:32,396 --> 00:01:34,692 I'm happy. What do you want me to do? 39 00:01:34,693 --> 00:01:37,682 I don't know. Spin around in your chair, feel the power. 40 00:01:40,518 --> 00:01:41,853 Is this good for you? 41 00:01:41,855 --> 00:01:43,655 Feels pretty powerful to me. 42 00:01:43,657 --> 00:01:45,474 I feel like you're mocking me. 43 00:01:45,476 --> 00:01:47,559 No. I would never. 44 00:01:47,561 --> 00:01:49,861 If someone held a gun to your head and asked you, 45 00:01:49,863 --> 00:01:51,229 "Who would be the best person 46 00:01:51,231 --> 00:01:53,365 to replace Amy as floor supervisor," 47 00:01:53,367 --> 00:01:54,306 who would you say? 48 00:01:54,307 --> 00:01:56,134 Probably the guy with the gun. 49 00:01:56,136 --> 00:01:57,970 Okay. No, he doesn't want the job. 50 00:01:57,972 --> 00:01:59,905 Oh, well, then what's up with the gun? 51 00:01:59,907 --> 00:02:01,540 Forget the gun. Who would you pick? 52 00:02:01,542 --> 00:02:03,762 Okay, if I had to pick someone here, 53 00:02:03,787 --> 00:02:05,005 it would probably be... 54 00:02:06,436 --> 00:02:08,213 Actually, you would be good for it. 55 00:02:08,215 --> 00:02:10,134 I know. That's what everyone is saying. 56 00:02:10,159 --> 00:02:12,718 But I don't think Amy sees me as a leader. 57 00:02:12,720 --> 00:02:14,953 In her eyes, I'd always be the wide-eyed ingenue... 58 00:02:14,955 --> 00:02:17,321 new to the city, naive but hopeful, 59 00:02:17,346 --> 00:02:18,757 someone who can eat whatever he wants 60 00:02:18,759 --> 00:02:19,891 and never put on any weight. 61 00:02:19,892 --> 00:02:21,460 Maybe you just need to step up 62 00:02:21,462 --> 00:02:22,761 and start acting like a leader. 63 00:02:22,763 --> 00:02:24,229 Fake it 'till you make it. 64 00:02:24,231 --> 00:02:25,797 What does that even mean? 65 00:02:25,799 --> 00:02:28,033 Like, I should just start telling people what to do? 66 00:02:28,035 --> 00:02:29,201 It worked for Bo. 67 00:02:29,203 --> 00:02:31,212 One day he walked into a drugstore 68 00:02:31,237 --> 00:02:34,315 wearing a white coat, and now he's a pharmacist tech. 69 00:02:34,354 --> 00:02:35,407 Really? 70 00:02:35,409 --> 00:02:37,541 We don't have to buy street drugs anymore. 71 00:02:38,114 --> 00:02:40,527 But why would Paul Walker's ghost single you out? 72 00:02:40,834 --> 00:02:42,714 I'm just saying... sometimes the car speeds up 73 00:02:42,716 --> 00:02:44,483 even when I'm not pressing on the gas. 74 00:02:44,485 --> 00:02:46,688 Good morning, fellow floor workers? 75 00:02:46,728 --> 00:02:49,173 Floor worker Glenn Sturgis, at your service. 76 00:02:49,198 --> 00:02:50,222 What's with the shirt? 77 00:02:50,224 --> 00:02:52,032 Oh, this is a little bit of history... 78 00:02:52,057 --> 00:02:55,079 the original Cloud 9 uniform. 79 00:02:55,104 --> 00:02:58,189 One size fits all, and it still fits. 80 00:02:58,291 --> 00:02:59,996 Oh, well, looks like you're ready for work. 81 00:03:00,021 --> 00:03:02,181 You got your shirt, you got your giant orthopedic shoes. 82 00:03:02,206 --> 00:03:05,136 And customized insoles from The Walking Company. 83 00:03:05,137 --> 00:03:07,305 And also, Jerusha and I are splitting a pair of clogs, 84 00:03:07,307 --> 00:03:09,813 'cause we're the same size... women's 15. 85 00:03:09,838 --> 00:03:11,921 Yeah. Your wife has beautiful feet. 86 00:03:12,432 --> 00:03:15,190 Thank you. Anyway, so where do we begin? 87 00:03:15,370 --> 00:03:17,205 Someone diarrhea'd in the toy aisle. 88 00:03:17,206 --> 00:03:19,594 Oh, dibs! If... if you don't mind. 89 00:03:19,596 --> 00:03:20,721 - That's all you, dude. - You got it. 90 00:03:20,746 --> 00:03:21,654 - Enjoy. - Okay. 91 00:03:21,655 --> 00:03:23,012 Off to mop the slop. 92 00:03:23,693 --> 00:03:26,127 Ah, man, he made it sound fun. 93 00:03:26,463 --> 00:03:28,469 - No, he didn't. - Yeah, he did. 94 00:03:28,471 --> 00:03:30,779 - Your dad is getting good. - Right? 95 00:03:30,780 --> 00:03:32,618 He's in this whole Brat Pack phase. 96 00:03:32,619 --> 00:03:35,009 16-year-old Amy is very excited. 97 00:03:35,011 --> 00:03:37,245 Oh, were you in the middle of sex? 98 00:03:37,247 --> 00:03:38,889 I wasn't. Were you? 99 00:03:38,890 --> 00:03:40,480 - No. - Weird. 100 00:03:40,481 --> 00:03:42,047 It really smells like sex in here. 101 00:03:42,369 --> 00:03:44,086 Probably smelling myself. 102 00:03:44,111 --> 00:03:46,118 Anyway, I wanted to talk about our security system. 103 00:03:46,143 --> 00:03:47,903 - Uh, what's wrong with it? - It's crap. 104 00:03:47,905 --> 00:03:50,001 Glenn never let me upgrade it because of the cost, 105 00:03:50,026 --> 00:03:52,792 which is why I am so excited that you're in charge. 106 00:03:52,794 --> 00:03:54,610 Uh, well, what does it cost? 107 00:03:54,612 --> 00:03:56,762 Honestly, not that much. It's just, like, a... 108 00:03:56,764 --> 00:03:59,732 just a tiny bit north of $600,000. 109 00:04:00,115 --> 00:04:01,805 $800,000, to be precise. 110 00:04:01,830 --> 00:04:05,632 Oh, yeah, well, that sounds like a bargain. 111 00:04:05,634 --> 00:04:08,068 Um, Jonah, what do you think? 112 00:04:09,705 --> 00:04:12,105 Um, we... 113 00:04:12,107 --> 00:04:15,675 Well, um, technology is always changing, 114 00:04:15,677 --> 00:04:17,143 so I'd probably wait a minute 115 00:04:17,145 --> 00:04:18,845 before investing in something new. 116 00:04:19,627 --> 00:04:21,510 Hmm. That... that's a really good point. 117 00:04:21,535 --> 00:04:23,245 Maybe we should revisit this. 118 00:04:24,720 --> 00:04:27,187 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. 119 00:04:27,189 --> 00:04:29,322 Thank you, Jonah, for your input. 120 00:04:29,324 --> 00:04:32,225 So glad you were here to chime in with your... 121 00:04:32,227 --> 00:04:33,854 valuable perspective. 122 00:04:36,565 --> 00:04:38,583 I feel like she didn't mean that. 123 00:04:43,505 --> 00:04:46,172 Now, that is a nice-looking display. 124 00:04:46,174 --> 00:04:47,774 Thanks. I sorted them 125 00:04:47,776 --> 00:04:50,477 by order of smells I encountered growing up. 126 00:04:51,790 --> 00:04:53,595 Well, um, since you're done here, 127 00:04:53,620 --> 00:04:54,751 why don't you go, um, 128 00:04:54,776 --> 00:04:56,583 straighten out the linen section? 129 00:04:57,062 --> 00:04:58,878 Oh, um... 130 00:04:59,849 --> 00:05:01,387 did someone say I should? 131 00:05:02,940 --> 00:05:03,838 I mean... 132 00:05:05,122 --> 00:05:06,204 who... 133 00:05:07,217 --> 00:05:08,659 Who... 134 00:05:09,346 --> 00:05:10,146 What? 135 00:05:12,093 --> 00:05:13,229 - Nothing. - Hmm. 136 00:05:20,269 --> 00:05:22,936 How is Fig Newton the first thing you ever smelled? 137 00:05:22,938 --> 00:05:24,505 And I just want to confirm, 138 00:05:24,507 --> 00:05:26,140 are you gonna want an assistant? 139 00:05:26,142 --> 00:05:28,149 Uh, oh, do I get an assistant? 140 00:05:28,174 --> 00:05:29,126 Glenn never had one. 141 00:05:29,151 --> 00:05:30,544 Yeah, he always thought 142 00:05:30,546 --> 00:05:32,579 it would come out of his salary, but it doesn't. 143 00:05:32,581 --> 00:05:34,381 Speaking of, um, I... 144 00:05:34,383 --> 00:05:37,418 I don't even really know what my salary is. 145 00:05:37,420 --> 00:05:39,149 Would you... would you happen to have it? 146 00:05:39,174 --> 00:05:42,018 Oh, it's, um, $109,000. 147 00:05:48,130 --> 00:05:49,997 Hello? Are you still there? 148 00:05:50,403 --> 00:05:52,414 Uh, yes. Uh... 149 00:05:52,415 --> 00:05:55,719 Yeah. Uh, uh-huh. Sorry, sorry. Um... 150 00:05:55,721 --> 00:05:57,204 Did you, uh... 151 00:05:57,206 --> 00:05:59,858 You said $100,000? 152 00:05:59,859 --> 00:06:01,675 And $9,000, plus a yearly bonus, 153 00:06:01,677 --> 00:06:03,327 usually around $10,000. 154 00:06:03,329 --> 00:06:05,313 $10,000? Oh, excuse me. 155 00:06:05,338 --> 00:06:07,715 Sorry. Sorry, sorry, sorry. Sorry, sorry. 156 00:06:07,717 --> 00:06:09,450 Hello? Hello? Hi, hi, hi. 157 00:06:09,452 --> 00:06:10,951 - You still there? - Yeah. 158 00:06:10,953 --> 00:06:13,280 Um, okay, so... 159 00:06:13,305 --> 00:06:16,490 so when you say $10,000, you mean, like, 160 00:06:16,893 --> 00:06:19,129 on top of the previously mentioned $9,000, 161 00:06:19,130 --> 00:06:20,454 or is it, like, a part of the $9,000 162 00:06:20,455 --> 00:06:21,795 so it's really just, like, $1,000? 163 00:06:21,797 --> 00:06:23,718 I don't know what that means, 164 00:06:23,743 --> 00:06:26,277 but it's a total of $119,000. 165 00:06:26,302 --> 00:06:28,676 And those are real, 166 00:06:28,677 --> 00:06:32,034 firm, rock-hard numbers? 167 00:06:32,059 --> 00:06:34,293 That's... I'm sorry if that sounded over-sexual. 168 00:06:34,295 --> 00:06:35,911 I'm just looking for confirmation. 169 00:06:35,913 --> 00:06:38,397 Uh-huh. So I'll just fax over the contract, 170 00:06:38,399 --> 00:06:40,132 and you can sign it at your convenience. 171 00:06:40,134 --> 00:06:42,301 Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, it's convenient right now. 172 00:06:42,303 --> 00:06:44,436 Uh, I could... I could do that right now. Uh-huh. 173 00:06:44,438 --> 00:06:46,167 Do you want to hear about your perks? 174 00:06:47,074 --> 00:06:48,745 Holy [bleep]! 175 00:06:49,385 --> 00:06:53,145 Yes, I would like to, um, hear about those, please. 176 00:07:05,677 --> 00:07:07,413 Good morning, Sarah. 177 00:07:07,438 --> 00:07:08,575 Looking great! 178 00:07:09,900 --> 00:07:11,416 Good hustle, Brett! 179 00:07:12,778 --> 00:07:14,838 Hey, Sayid, you can go on a break. 180 00:07:14,840 --> 00:07:16,256 - I already had my break. - Well, then it's 181 00:07:16,258 --> 00:07:17,841 a double-break day for you, my friend. 182 00:07:17,843 --> 00:07:19,035 You're in a good mood. 183 00:07:19,036 --> 00:07:20,953 ? Somebody got laid ? 184 00:07:20,954 --> 00:07:23,184 No, actually, I, um... 185 00:07:23,791 --> 00:07:25,240 I'm just very happy. 186 00:07:25,442 --> 00:07:26,723 I like my new job. 187 00:07:27,215 --> 00:07:28,658 Oh, also, hey, everyone? 188 00:07:28,687 --> 00:07:30,721 There are doughnuts in the break room. 189 00:07:30,921 --> 00:07:33,028 Ooh, who forgot their doughnuts? 190 00:07:33,029 --> 00:07:35,731 - No, I bought them. - Okay. 191 00:07:35,756 --> 00:07:38,322 Nobody eat the doughnuts. They're Amy's. 192 00:07:38,323 --> 00:07:39,362 No, that's not... I... 193 00:07:40,028 --> 00:07:42,477 Doesn't matter. Good job, everyone. 194 00:07:44,668 --> 00:07:46,580 She's so weird about her doughnuts. 195 00:07:47,410 --> 00:07:49,506 Hey, so I'm restocking this cereal, 196 00:07:49,508 --> 00:07:51,603 and there's something moving inside. 197 00:07:51,604 --> 00:07:53,877 It's definitely alive, because I can hear it scratching. 198 00:07:53,879 --> 00:07:55,345 I don't care about a cereal roach. 199 00:07:55,347 --> 00:07:57,931 What I care about is you keeping your big nose... 200 00:07:57,933 --> 00:07:59,516 that's not a slur, just an expression... 201 00:07:59,518 --> 00:08:01,463 - out of my business. - What are you talking about? 202 00:08:01,464 --> 00:08:03,303 The way you [bleep] me out of that security system. 203 00:08:03,305 --> 00:08:05,042 Let's keep something straight. You're the boyfriend. 204 00:08:05,262 --> 00:08:06,774 I'm the assistant manager. 205 00:08:06,776 --> 00:08:09,193 You get this, and you get this, 206 00:08:09,195 --> 00:08:11,129 maybe this... that's between you guys, I don't want to know. 207 00:08:11,130 --> 00:08:12,747 - Dina... - I said I don't want to know. 208 00:08:12,748 --> 00:08:13,588 But this... 209 00:08:13,589 --> 00:08:16,667 everything north of the fun park... this is my domain. 210 00:08:16,668 --> 00:08:17,826 So, basically, you're asking me 211 00:08:17,827 --> 00:08:19,552 to keep my opinions to myself 212 00:08:19,553 --> 00:08:21,321 and limit my relationship with Amy 213 00:08:21,323 --> 00:08:23,698 - to wordless, mindless sex. - Exactly. 214 00:08:24,210 --> 00:08:26,315 Huh. I thought this was going to be a harder conversation. 215 00:08:26,316 --> 00:08:28,563 I'm not saying no, but if I did, 216 00:08:28,564 --> 00:08:30,440 just out of curiosity, what would happen? 217 00:08:30,465 --> 00:08:32,983 Help me out, man. Don't make me make her dump you. 218 00:08:32,985 --> 00:08:34,284 Don't make me do that. 219 00:08:34,286 --> 00:08:36,153 I think I'm gonna make you do it. 220 00:08:36,155 --> 00:08:37,237 Fine. 221 00:08:37,239 --> 00:08:38,565 You had your chance. 222 00:08:39,885 --> 00:08:41,542 And, again, the nose thing wasn't... 223 00:08:41,544 --> 00:08:43,076 You get it. I love everyone. 224 00:08:44,580 --> 00:08:46,747 Marcus, I'm gonna need you to fill in for Brett 225 00:08:46,749 --> 00:08:48,332 'cause he raged out on someone's baby again. 226 00:08:48,334 --> 00:08:50,081 Sayid, clean the pharmacy counter. 227 00:08:50,106 --> 00:08:51,518 The kids have been inhaling the pill dust. 228 00:08:51,520 --> 00:08:53,754 Why are you telling us what to do? 229 00:08:53,756 --> 00:08:55,472 You're not floor supervisor. 230 00:08:55,474 --> 00:08:56,590 Yeah, you're right. 231 00:08:56,949 --> 00:08:58,168 I just went to Office Supplies, 232 00:08:58,193 --> 00:08:59,993 picked up a clipboard, filled it with blank paper, 233 00:09:00,018 --> 00:09:01,215 and started giving people orders, 234 00:09:01,240 --> 00:09:02,789 without any authority whatsoever. 235 00:09:02,993 --> 00:09:05,137 I mean, come on. 236 00:09:05,287 --> 00:09:08,418 Come on, get with the program, Sayid. 237 00:09:09,332 --> 00:09:12,732 Look, Jonah's a bimbo. You're management now. 238 00:09:12,733 --> 00:09:14,691 You don't see Dale Federman from the Clayton store 239 00:09:14,692 --> 00:09:16,697 walking around with some floozy on his arm. 240 00:09:16,698 --> 00:09:18,398 Okay? Keep him at the kids' table. 241 00:09:18,400 --> 00:09:20,900 Yeah, no, those... you make some really great points. 242 00:09:20,902 --> 00:09:23,736 - I'll keep them in mind. - Well, just think about it. 243 00:09:23,738 --> 00:09:25,350 And if you need to have some rebound sex, 244 00:09:25,367 --> 00:09:27,034 I'm happy to call my guy. 245 00:09:27,215 --> 00:09:29,056 He's great. Croatian. 246 00:09:30,262 --> 00:09:31,995 Myrtle, hey. 247 00:09:31,997 --> 00:09:34,664 - How are you? - Oh, okay. 248 00:09:34,666 --> 00:09:36,633 You eating some ketchup there? 249 00:09:36,635 --> 00:09:38,802 They give me these packets for free. 250 00:09:38,804 --> 00:09:41,721 If you leave it in your mouth, it gets warm 251 00:09:41,723 --> 00:09:44,754 and tastes just like... tomato soup. 252 00:09:45,593 --> 00:09:47,666 Um... uh... 253 00:09:48,263 --> 00:09:52,148 you know, if you're still in between jobs, 254 00:09:52,150 --> 00:09:54,044 they just promoted me to manager. 255 00:09:54,045 --> 00:09:55,902 Of the Cardinals? 256 00:09:55,904 --> 00:09:57,854 No, of the store. 257 00:09:57,856 --> 00:09:59,522 And... and they told me 258 00:09:59,524 --> 00:10:00,990 that I could hire an assistant, 259 00:10:00,992 --> 00:10:02,878 but I don't really need and assistant, so... 260 00:10:03,498 --> 00:10:05,966 Why don't I just hire you? 261 00:10:05,991 --> 00:10:07,329 Oh, really? 262 00:10:08,283 --> 00:10:11,334 I'll be the best assistant you've ever had. 263 00:10:11,336 --> 00:10:13,411 No, no, no, you don't... you don't have to come in. 264 00:10:13,412 --> 00:10:14,787 You can just take the money. 265 00:10:14,789 --> 00:10:16,956 I used to work for Mr. Nelson 266 00:10:16,958 --> 00:10:18,958 of Pan-American Airlines. 267 00:10:18,960 --> 00:10:22,011 I'll be here bright and early every morning 268 00:10:22,013 --> 00:10:25,155 with your racing forms and pipe tobacco. 269 00:10:25,754 --> 00:10:28,172 Great. Yeah, well, welcome aboard. 270 00:10:28,553 --> 00:10:31,437 ? Grab a couple cans, stack 'em like blocks ? 271 00:10:31,439 --> 00:10:34,934 ? Grab another can, start a new row ? 272 00:10:34,959 --> 00:10:37,965 ? Having so much fun, watch me as I go ? 273 00:10:39,261 --> 00:10:40,222 Sorry. 274 00:10:42,707 --> 00:10:44,000 That sucks. 275 00:10:44,025 --> 00:10:45,735 Welcome to that floor-worker life. 276 00:10:45,737 --> 00:10:47,370 I wanted to rebuild it anyway, 277 00:10:47,372 --> 00:10:48,738 'cause I think if I make 278 00:10:48,740 --> 00:10:50,874 the base wider, I can go even higher. 279 00:10:50,876 --> 00:10:53,826 Glenn, you know, it's okay to complain. 280 00:10:53,828 --> 00:10:54,850 I do it all the time. 281 00:10:54,851 --> 00:10:57,747 - Well, I know you do. - What's that supposed to mean? 282 00:10:57,749 --> 00:11:00,383 There's no such thing as a bad job. 283 00:11:00,385 --> 00:11:03,326 If you have a good attitude, every job is fun. 284 00:11:03,616 --> 00:11:06,306 It's not my attitude. This is a terrible job. 285 00:11:06,308 --> 00:11:08,143 Well, okay. Whatever you say. 286 00:11:10,011 --> 00:11:12,345 ? Stacking up the canned foods ? 287 00:11:12,347 --> 00:11:14,314 Come on, now. Let's see it. Wave those hands. 288 00:11:14,316 --> 00:11:16,339 ? Stacking up the canned foods ? 289 00:11:16,364 --> 00:11:18,505 Come on! You know you want to. 290 00:11:19,739 --> 00:11:21,905 Oh, hey, Myrtle. What are you doing here? 291 00:11:21,907 --> 00:11:23,356 I just finished eating 292 00:11:23,358 --> 00:11:25,858 all the jelly beans she asked me to. 293 00:11:25,860 --> 00:11:28,067 Myrtle is my new assistant. 294 00:11:28,068 --> 00:11:29,662 - Oh. - Yes. 295 00:11:29,664 --> 00:11:31,208 What should I do next? 296 00:11:31,520 --> 00:11:33,723 Um, why don't you take 297 00:11:33,724 --> 00:11:35,640 the sales announcements to Garrett? 298 00:11:35,811 --> 00:11:38,065 Oh, Garrett. Is he the... 299 00:11:38,423 --> 00:11:40,089 What do they like to be called these days? 300 00:11:40,091 --> 00:11:42,008 No, no, no, no. Let's not get into that. 301 00:11:42,010 --> 00:11:44,010 Just take it over to customer service. 302 00:11:44,012 --> 00:11:45,929 Aye, aye, Captain. 303 00:11:47,966 --> 00:11:50,883 You get an assistant... and it's Myrtle? 304 00:11:50,884 --> 00:11:52,741 Well, I just wanted to help the lady out. 305 00:11:52,766 --> 00:11:55,054 Besides, I am in a good mood. 306 00:11:55,056 --> 00:11:56,899 Ooh-hoo-hoo. What's going on? 307 00:11:57,905 --> 00:11:59,475 I just found out my salary. 308 00:11:59,477 --> 00:12:00,451 It's good? 309 00:12:01,363 --> 00:12:03,883 - I shouldn't say. - You are dying to tell me. 310 00:12:03,884 --> 00:12:05,483 Yes, of course I'm dying to tell you. 311 00:12:05,484 --> 00:12:07,080 Okay, I'm not gonna tell you my salary, 312 00:12:07,081 --> 00:12:09,485 but will you please hand me the contract 313 00:12:09,487 --> 00:12:11,454 that's sitting on my desk while I check out something 314 00:12:11,456 --> 00:12:13,379 on my wall and I trust you not to look? 315 00:12:15,936 --> 00:12:17,485 "Attention Cloud 9 customers, 316 00:12:17,486 --> 00:12:19,069 do you have a pet fish you love?" 317 00:12:19,094 --> 00:12:21,835 No, that's... this is the sale announcements. 318 00:12:21,860 --> 00:12:24,047 The sale announcements that Myrtle 319 00:12:24,048 --> 00:12:25,335 just took to Garrett? 320 00:12:26,944 --> 00:12:28,698 Get her! Myrtle! 321 00:12:28,923 --> 00:12:32,091 "Section 5, paragraph K... salary. 322 00:12:32,093 --> 00:12:33,490 "Employee shall be paid 323 00:12:33,491 --> 00:12:37,923 at the rate of $109,000 annually." 324 00:12:38,330 --> 00:12:41,828 Not sure why Amy wants you all to know she makes 109K, 325 00:12:41,853 --> 00:12:43,436 but, uh, good for her. 326 00:12:43,438 --> 00:12:45,944 "Section 6... nondisclosure agreement." 327 00:12:46,405 --> 00:12:48,661 I fear that ship has sailed. 328 00:12:50,327 --> 00:12:51,654 I'm very sorry. 329 00:12:52,050 --> 00:12:54,076 Obviously, I didn't intend 330 00:12:54,101 --> 00:12:56,319 to tell everyone how much I was making. 331 00:12:56,614 --> 00:12:58,113 And, honestly, I'm quite surprised 332 00:12:58,115 --> 00:12:59,836 that anyone receiving that information 333 00:12:59,837 --> 00:13:01,901 from a clearly confused and elderly woman 334 00:13:01,903 --> 00:13:03,196 would make that announcement. 335 00:13:03,197 --> 00:13:05,070 I'm a good soldier. I do what I'm told. 336 00:13:05,072 --> 00:13:07,004 Well, I just want to say, it's awesome to see 337 00:13:07,005 --> 00:13:08,974 another floor supervisor doing so well. 338 00:13:08,976 --> 00:13:11,510 I think I speak for all floor supervisors when I say 339 00:13:11,512 --> 00:13:12,828 you are an inspiration. 340 00:13:12,830 --> 00:13:14,830 Oh, okay. Thank you. 341 00:13:14,832 --> 00:13:16,126 It's probably tough on Jonah, though. 342 00:13:16,127 --> 00:13:17,558 Can't imagine where this is going. 343 00:13:17,559 --> 00:13:19,463 I'm just saying... making so much less money 344 00:13:19,464 --> 00:13:22,004 than your girlfriend, it's got to be emasculating. 345 00:13:22,006 --> 00:13:23,581 Probably makes it tough to get an erection. 346 00:13:23,582 --> 00:13:25,315 My erections are fine, thank you. 347 00:13:25,686 --> 00:13:27,818 Fine? Lucky lady. 348 00:13:27,819 --> 00:13:30,062 I'm actually shocked you're not making more. 349 00:13:30,064 --> 00:13:31,347 I mean, I thought a manager 350 00:13:31,349 --> 00:13:32,681 would at least make more than we do. 351 00:13:32,683 --> 00:13:34,416 - She does. - Uh, I don't think so. 352 00:13:34,417 --> 00:13:36,413 - How much do you make? - Same thing we all make... 353 00:13:36,438 --> 00:13:38,351 $134,000 a year. 354 00:13:38,375 --> 00:13:39,767 _ 355 00:13:39,768 --> 00:13:41,311 How do you make that much a year? 356 00:13:41,312 --> 00:13:44,636 52 weeks times 30 hours a week times minimum wage... 357 00:13:44,661 --> 00:13:45,995 86 bucks an hour. 358 00:13:45,997 --> 00:13:48,747 No, no, no, no. Minimum wage is $8.60 an hour. 359 00:13:49,013 --> 00:13:50,749 I must have missed a decimal point. 360 00:13:50,751 --> 00:13:53,035 So no part of you thought to question 361 00:13:53,037 --> 00:13:56,672 why you were making $86 an hour to work retail? 362 00:13:56,674 --> 00:13:58,507 I thought that's what we all made. 363 00:13:58,509 --> 00:13:59,961 How do you guys live 364 00:13:59,962 --> 00:14:02,204 on under $134,000 a year? 365 00:14:02,205 --> 00:14:04,374 I cut the budget. I let people go. 366 00:14:04,375 --> 00:14:06,251 You're gonna have to pay that back. 367 00:14:06,252 --> 00:14:08,482 Oh, now you're taking his money? 368 00:14:08,483 --> 00:14:10,007 The rich get richer. 369 00:14:10,008 --> 00:14:12,285 No, it goes back to corporate, not to me. 370 00:14:12,286 --> 00:14:14,890 And who pays you? Corporate. 371 00:14:14,892 --> 00:14:17,412 Funny how that works. Follow the money, people. 372 00:14:17,413 --> 00:14:19,229 I can't pay that money back. 373 00:14:19,230 --> 00:14:20,834 I'm living hand to mouth as it is. 374 00:14:20,835 --> 00:14:23,535 I always say, "Mo' money, mo' problems." 375 00:14:23,537 --> 00:14:26,450 That's what you say? You say that? 376 00:14:37,568 --> 00:14:39,750 Oop! Does anyone need any extra mayonnaise? 377 00:14:39,751 --> 00:14:40,917 'Cause it's on me. 378 00:14:40,919 --> 00:14:42,502 Good one. 379 00:14:42,864 --> 00:14:44,721 It's nice that you can find the humor in all this. 380 00:14:44,722 --> 00:14:46,068 Well, full disclosure... 381 00:14:46,070 --> 00:14:47,768 I stole that from "Hi and Lois." 382 00:14:47,769 --> 00:14:48,949 Hey, you know, if I was in your shoes, 383 00:14:48,950 --> 00:14:51,312 I'd just be thinking about that $90,000 a year 384 00:14:51,313 --> 00:14:52,589 that I walked away from. 385 00:14:52,590 --> 00:14:55,592 You know, over the next 20 years, that's $1.8 million? 386 00:14:55,971 --> 00:14:58,976 So I don't think anybody would blame you if you were a little upset. 387 00:14:59,001 --> 00:15:00,599 No, I'm fine. 388 00:15:01,161 --> 00:15:03,353 Hey, but do you feel like a BLT? 389 00:15:03,544 --> 00:15:05,718 I do, 'cause I'm covered in mayonnaise! 390 00:15:06,185 --> 00:15:07,697 BLT! 391 00:15:07,698 --> 00:15:09,915 Oh, my God. I am literally dead. 392 00:15:10,337 --> 00:15:11,953 No, Justine, it's not funny! 393 00:15:11,955 --> 00:15:14,403 He's a miserable man, and it's a terrible job. 394 00:15:15,818 --> 00:15:17,117 Clean that up, dork. 395 00:15:18,261 --> 00:15:19,029 Uh-oh. 396 00:15:19,930 --> 00:15:23,014 Clean up on aisle have-what-she's-having. 397 00:15:24,271 --> 00:15:25,300 Stop! 398 00:15:25,302 --> 00:15:26,601 I'm gonna pee my pants. 399 00:15:26,603 --> 00:15:28,436 Well, if you do, I'll clean that up, too. 400 00:15:28,438 --> 00:15:31,139 Stop! Oh, it's happening! 401 00:15:31,141 --> 00:15:32,390 Oh, God! Yeah, yeah. 402 00:15:33,263 --> 00:15:34,776 Not again. 403 00:15:34,778 --> 00:15:36,611 Floor Supervisor Mateo Liwanag 404 00:15:36,613 --> 00:15:38,095 to Customer Service, please. 405 00:15:38,448 --> 00:15:40,864 Floor Supervisor Mateo Liwanag 406 00:15:40,889 --> 00:15:42,722 to customer service. 407 00:15:44,237 --> 00:15:46,321 Oh. 408 00:15:46,323 --> 00:15:48,456 That's me. Got to take it. 409 00:15:48,458 --> 00:15:49,211 Whoo! 410 00:15:49,872 --> 00:15:51,322 You know who you should date 411 00:15:51,474 --> 00:15:53,795 is that hot guy that you came in with last week. 412 00:15:53,797 --> 00:15:54,712 Oh, maybe. 413 00:15:54,739 --> 00:15:57,005 Two problems... he's gay, and he's my brother. 414 00:15:57,050 --> 00:15:59,167 Mm, I don't know. You guys had good chemistry. 415 00:15:59,169 --> 00:16:02,554 - Oh, what happened here? - I think it's slushie vomit. 416 00:16:02,556 --> 00:16:04,305 And there's a whole sandwich in the middle, 417 00:16:04,307 --> 00:16:07,185 but I'm pretty sure someone just dropped it in after. 418 00:16:07,186 --> 00:16:08,029 Yeah, probably. 419 00:16:08,045 --> 00:16:10,045 People don't usually eat those whole. 420 00:16:11,622 --> 00:16:13,431 - Are you okay? - Oh. 421 00:16:13,433 --> 00:16:14,983 My knees are just acting up. 422 00:16:14,985 --> 00:16:16,484 I'm trying not to go to the doctor 423 00:16:16,486 --> 00:16:18,102 'cause I'm saving up for a bike. 424 00:16:18,104 --> 00:16:20,855 The bus driver keeps trying to drive me to his house. 425 00:16:20,857 --> 00:16:22,774 Well, why don't you go take a break? 426 00:16:22,776 --> 00:16:24,325 I'll clean this up. I can do this. 427 00:16:24,327 --> 00:16:26,444 What are you doing? You're the manager... 428 00:16:26,446 --> 00:16:28,166 not some vomit girl like Sandra. 429 00:16:28,191 --> 00:16:29,075 It's fine. 430 00:16:29,152 --> 00:16:32,108 Some of it is mine, actually, you know, 'cause of the smell. 431 00:16:32,836 --> 00:16:34,031 Look, guys, it's not like 432 00:16:34,032 --> 00:16:36,677 I'm above cleaning up vomit now. 433 00:16:36,678 --> 00:16:39,591 I'm still, "Amy from the block, girl." 434 00:16:39,593 --> 00:16:41,709 - Thank you. - Amy, corporate just sent you 435 00:16:41,711 --> 00:16:43,428 a welcome basket with champagne. 436 00:16:43,430 --> 00:16:45,380 - Where should I put it? - Just anywhere. 437 00:16:45,382 --> 00:16:46,121 Anywhere is fine. 438 00:16:46,122 --> 00:16:47,765 Okay, I'll put it in your Lexus. 439 00:16:48,763 --> 00:16:50,100 Whoa. You have a Lexus? 440 00:16:50,101 --> 00:16:51,803 No, of course not. 441 00:16:51,805 --> 00:16:53,688 There's also a man outside waiting for you 442 00:16:53,690 --> 00:16:54,857 with your company car. 443 00:16:54,882 --> 00:16:55,705 It's a Lexus. 444 00:16:57,310 --> 00:16:58,810 Oh, uh, well... 445 00:16:59,271 --> 00:17:02,313 I guess I should probably go sign for it, then. 446 00:17:03,341 --> 00:17:04,532 Um, sorry. 447 00:17:04,534 --> 00:17:06,367 Next time. Can I just... 448 00:17:06,369 --> 00:17:08,069 - Sorry. Thank you. - Ow. Ow. 449 00:17:10,957 --> 00:17:12,973 Yeah, you're gonna need to get all of that. 450 00:17:14,560 --> 00:17:17,480 I don't know how I'm gonna pay back corporate. I'm broke. 451 00:17:17,825 --> 00:17:20,138 How? You live with your mother. 452 00:17:20,140 --> 00:17:22,007 Your car doesn't have any doors. 453 00:17:22,009 --> 00:17:25,260 And you've been making $134,000 every year 454 00:17:25,262 --> 00:17:26,745 for the last six years. 455 00:17:26,747 --> 00:17:29,058 - Where does all the money go? - I don't know. 456 00:17:29,521 --> 00:17:32,074 I get the guacamole from Chipotle every time. 457 00:17:32,286 --> 00:17:36,287 Excuse me, do you sell any books by David Foster Wallace? 458 00:17:36,990 --> 00:17:38,607 Uh, no, sorry. 459 00:17:38,609 --> 00:17:39,687 I keep suggesting it, 460 00:17:39,688 --> 00:17:42,944 but the employees all just make "Infinite Jest" of me. 461 00:17:45,082 --> 00:17:46,615 You're so funny. 462 00:17:46,617 --> 00:17:48,823 Do you want to go outside and do it in your car? 463 00:17:49,586 --> 00:17:50,207 Uh... 464 00:17:50,739 --> 00:17:52,370 This young lady says 465 00:17:52,372 --> 00:17:54,873 she was paid to seduce me, record it on tape, 466 00:17:54,875 --> 00:17:56,708 and then give that tape to the store manager. 467 00:17:56,710 --> 00:17:58,554 I requested a nerdy girl-next-door type. 468 00:17:58,555 --> 00:18:00,712 You're just a bad girl they stuck a pair of glasses on. 469 00:18:00,714 --> 00:18:03,298 Look, I'm sorry you're not getting your security system, 470 00:18:03,300 --> 00:18:05,100 but Amy and I are not gonna break up. 471 00:18:05,102 --> 00:18:07,219 I can't believe you hired a prostitute. 472 00:18:07,221 --> 00:18:09,779 Sorry, sex worker. You have agency. 473 00:18:10,974 --> 00:18:13,141 So should I go? 474 00:18:13,143 --> 00:18:15,310 I paid for two hours. You may as well help Justine 475 00:18:15,312 --> 00:18:17,646 re-price towels to match the new EDLPs. 476 00:18:17,648 --> 00:18:18,482 Follow me. 477 00:18:19,032 --> 00:18:19,892 Come on. 478 00:18:22,703 --> 00:18:24,809 Oh, hey, Amy, this lady wants to use 479 00:18:24,810 --> 00:18:27,255 her EBT card to pay for diapers. 480 00:18:27,703 --> 00:18:30,538 Yeah, we can't do that. They won't let us. 481 00:18:30,581 --> 00:18:32,023 Do you know how expensive diapers are? 482 00:18:32,024 --> 00:18:34,907 Yeah, I do, actually. I also have a baby. 483 00:18:34,908 --> 00:18:37,659 Well, you also make $109,000 a year, 484 00:18:37,661 --> 00:18:39,628 so you're not exactly in the same boat. 485 00:18:39,630 --> 00:18:42,164 Well, I wasn't saying that I was in the same boat. 486 00:18:42,166 --> 00:18:44,716 I was just saying that I understand the cost of diapers. 487 00:18:44,718 --> 00:18:47,068 I mean, obviously, I can... I can pay for diapers. 488 00:18:47,093 --> 00:18:48,961 Really? Thank you. 489 00:18:49,306 --> 00:18:51,723 - That's generous of you. - Oh, no, no. No. 490 00:18:51,725 --> 00:18:52,924 Sorry, I wasn't saying 491 00:18:52,926 --> 00:18:54,342 that I could pay for your diapers. 492 00:18:54,344 --> 00:18:56,061 - Oh. - I mean, I would. 493 00:18:56,063 --> 00:18:58,925 It's just that if I went around buying everyone's diapers 494 00:18:58,950 --> 00:19:01,349 who's on food stamps, I'd be broke in, like, a day. 495 00:19:01,351 --> 00:19:03,516 Sure, it's fine. I'll buy them myself. 496 00:19:04,271 --> 00:19:06,732 - God bless America. - I know, right? 497 00:19:06,757 --> 00:19:08,774 I'm sorry. I just... I don't... I don't understand 498 00:19:08,776 --> 00:19:11,888 why it's my responsibility to buy your diapers. 499 00:19:13,863 --> 00:19:15,580 You know what? Fine. Okay, cool. 500 00:19:15,582 --> 00:19:18,166 Yeah, I can... I can buy these diapers. 501 00:19:18,168 --> 00:19:19,211 Run the card. 502 00:19:22,339 --> 00:19:23,955 But I'm... I'm not paying for the candy. 503 00:19:23,957 --> 00:19:26,792 Oh! So, because you're rich, you know what's best for me, 504 00:19:26,794 --> 00:19:28,710 and I'm just too fat for candy? 505 00:19:28,712 --> 00:19:30,500 No, that is not what I said. 506 00:19:32,132 --> 00:19:34,839 I will pay for the candy, obviously. 507 00:19:35,469 --> 00:19:37,803 Garrett, I just found the funniest thing 508 00:19:37,805 --> 00:19:38,970 while I was cleaning. 509 00:19:38,972 --> 00:19:41,997 It was a rat inside a used condom. 510 00:19:42,239 --> 00:19:44,976 I was like, "How did you get in there, little fella?" 511 00:19:44,978 --> 00:19:46,646 This is a bad job, okay? 512 00:19:46,747 --> 00:19:49,358 This is a soul-crushing, miserable place to work. 513 00:19:49,817 --> 00:19:51,733 I know that. I know that in my heart. 514 00:19:51,735 --> 00:19:55,261 Nothing you say will ever, ever take that away from me. 515 00:19:58,992 --> 00:19:59,909 Okay. 516 00:20:00,711 --> 00:20:01,666 See you later. 517 00:20:05,883 --> 00:20:08,475 Hi! Welcome to Cloud 9. 518 00:20:10,489 --> 00:20:12,170 Oh, why, thank you! 519 00:20:12,172 --> 00:20:15,302 Do you like cool savings? 520 00:20:15,578 --> 00:20:16,808 Yes, I do. 521 00:20:16,810 --> 00:20:21,146 Why not check out our frozen treats in Grocery? 522 00:20:21,148 --> 00:20:24,559 Oh, I will. Thank you so much. 523 00:20:25,462 --> 00:20:27,128 Frozen treats. 524 00:20:32,526 --> 00:20:35,385 Hey, Mateo, after I do go-backs, I'm gonna take 15? 525 00:20:35,389 --> 00:20:36,344 Thanks, Joelle. 526 00:20:39,893 --> 00:20:41,480 Hmm. 527 00:20:44,788 --> 00:20:46,288 Everything okay? 528 00:20:46,290 --> 00:20:47,873 Rough day. 529 00:20:47,875 --> 00:20:49,124 Yeah, I heard. 530 00:20:49,126 --> 00:20:50,175 If it makes you feel any better, 531 00:20:50,176 --> 00:20:51,911 I turned down sex with a hooker for you. 532 00:20:52,997 --> 00:20:54,448 Oh! That does make me feel better. 533 00:20:55,232 --> 00:20:57,032 I can't wait for this day to be over. 534 00:20:57,034 --> 00:20:58,200 I need a drink. 535 00:20:58,202 --> 00:21:00,235 So let's go get a drink! 536 00:21:00,237 --> 00:21:01,486 It's the middle of the day. 537 00:21:01,488 --> 00:21:03,071 Oh, yeah. That's right. 538 00:21:03,073 --> 00:21:04,940 You don't want to get in trouble with your boss. 539 00:21:06,313 --> 00:21:07,195 Oh, wait. 540 00:21:08,745 --> 00:21:09,606 I'm the boss. 541 00:21:09,607 --> 00:21:11,485 Yeah, that's where I was going with that. 542 00:21:12,521 --> 00:21:14,543 - Let's go get a drink. - All right. 543 00:21:14,568 --> 00:21:15,834 But you're paying. 544 00:21:15,836 --> 00:21:17,863 You won't stop bragging about how much money you make. 545 00:21:17,864 --> 00:21:20,435 - $109,000. - All right, all right. 546 00:21:20,460 --> 00:21:22,359 - Plus perks. - What? 547 00:21:22,384 --> 00:21:28,630 Synced and corrected by hawken45 for www.addic7ed.com