1 00:00:00,063 --> 00:00:03,272 All right, kids, let's go. Bowls in the sink, come on. 2 00:00:03,297 --> 00:00:05,375 Dad, you have to put something healthy in there. 3 00:00:05,400 --> 00:00:07,273 Look, there's beef jerky. 4 00:00:07,559 --> 00:00:09,259 Chock full of protein, 5 00:00:09,284 --> 00:00:10,794 and it'll keep them out of the dating pool 6 00:00:10,819 --> 00:00:12,430 for a few years. 7 00:00:13,170 --> 00:00:15,470 No, you have to give them fruit. 8 00:00:15,495 --> 00:00:17,656 - No, he doesn't. - Yeah, don't let her control you, Dad. 9 00:00:17,681 --> 00:00:21,195 She's right, all right? Nobody likes a bully. Come on. 10 00:00:21,220 --> 00:00:22,524 Okay. Okay, no problem. 11 00:00:22,549 --> 00:00:23,915 Um... 12 00:00:25,265 --> 00:00:27,693 - Who are we? - Gables! 13 00:00:27,718 --> 00:00:29,752 - What are we? - Leaders! 14 00:00:29,777 --> 00:00:32,366 - Who's got it better than us? - Nobody! 15 00:00:32,681 --> 00:00:34,295 And what are we late for? 16 00:00:34,320 --> 00:00:35,953 The bus if we don't get moving. Now go. 17 00:00:37,211 --> 00:00:39,111 Good morning. Oh, shoot. 18 00:00:39,136 --> 00:00:40,640 Did I miss the "who are we" chant? 19 00:00:40,665 --> 00:00:41,976 Oh... 20 00:00:43,350 --> 00:00:45,511 Chale, technically, you're not a Gable. 21 00:00:45,536 --> 00:00:47,636 So when you chime in, it kind of weirds me out. 22 00:00:47,661 --> 00:00:50,095 I just get caught up in it. 23 00:00:50,114 --> 00:00:51,457 It is inspiring. 24 00:00:51,482 --> 00:00:53,093 Oh, here. You got some mail. 25 00:00:53,118 --> 00:00:55,264 Oh, Chale mail. 26 00:00:57,272 --> 00:00:59,184 Junk... 27 00:00:59,366 --> 00:01:01,166 - You gotta be kidding me. - Not again. 28 00:01:01,191 --> 00:01:03,672 What is it? It's from your mom's gym. 29 00:01:03,697 --> 00:01:05,381 It's a postcard. 30 00:01:05,774 --> 00:01:07,707 "Haven't seen you. We miss you." 31 00:01:07,732 --> 00:01:10,076 You know what? So do I. Okay, you know what? Give me that. 32 00:01:10,100 --> 00:01:11,233 I will call them right now. 33 00:01:11,259 --> 00:01:12,523 It's been over a year since she died. 34 00:01:12,548 --> 00:01:13,915 They shouldn't still be sending this. 35 00:01:13,940 --> 00:01:15,293 That's right, right? Thank you. 36 00:01:15,318 --> 00:01:16,577 Oh, but don't throw that out. 37 00:01:16,602 --> 00:01:18,710 On the bottom there's a coupon for a kung fu lesson. 38 00:01:18,735 --> 00:01:21,055 I wanna go to it. Yeah. 39 00:01:21,148 --> 00:01:23,444 - Oh, no. - What? What's the matter? 40 00:01:23,469 --> 00:01:25,939 My visa has expired. 41 00:01:25,964 --> 00:01:28,287 It states here I could get deported. 42 00:01:28,312 --> 00:01:29,507 Wow. 43 00:01:29,558 --> 00:01:31,842 Well, you keep in touch. 44 00:01:35,228 --> 00:01:37,929 Dad, come on. This is serious. Let me see that. 45 00:01:37,954 --> 00:01:41,304 It makes no sense. I-I filled out all the proper paperwork. 46 00:01:41,329 --> 00:01:43,196 You know, you gotta stay on top of those things 47 00:01:43,221 --> 00:01:45,015 if you wanna be a citizen. 48 00:01:45,040 --> 00:01:46,407 I mean, you could say a lot about Americans, 49 00:01:46,432 --> 00:01:48,430 but we're not lazy, you know? 50 00:01:49,305 --> 00:01:51,765 I have seen you watch "Ray Donovan" in Spanish 51 00:01:51,790 --> 00:01:54,240 because the remote was sitting on top of the TV. 52 00:01:55,700 --> 00:01:58,702 Yeah, and now I know how to say "Get my gun" in Español. 53 00:01:58,727 --> 00:02:01,038 Dame mi pistolas. 54 00:02:03,560 --> 00:02:06,830 Okay, wait, Dad, you sent in Chale's sponsor form, right? 55 00:02:06,855 --> 00:02:08,394 Remember? I told you how important that was? 56 00:02:08,419 --> 00:02:10,191 Yes, you told me, and I sent it in. 57 00:02:10,216 --> 00:02:13,050 - You're sure? - I'm positive. I have my own system. 58 00:02:13,075 --> 00:02:14,851 I take all the important paperwork, 59 00:02:14,876 --> 00:02:16,476 I put it right in this drawer, 60 00:02:16,501 --> 00:02:18,377 and then, once a week, I mail it out. 61 00:02:18,402 --> 00:02:20,035 Mm. 62 00:02:25,639 --> 00:02:27,213 It's still in there, isn't it? 63 00:02:27,489 --> 00:02:29,483 It's not a perfect system. 64 00:02:35,000 --> 00:02:37,560 Dad, what are we gonna do? Chale's gonna get deported. 65 00:02:37,585 --> 00:02:40,286 I can't come back in this country for three "yahs." 66 00:02:40,311 --> 00:02:42,913 Three "yahs"! 67 00:02:44,793 --> 00:02:47,459 How many "yahs"? 68 00:02:50,204 --> 00:02:52,204 I'd have to move back to Bungleton. 69 00:02:52,229 --> 00:02:53,736 I... I'm getting a stomachache. 70 00:02:53,761 --> 00:02:55,494 No, it's gonna be all right, okay? 71 00:02:55,519 --> 00:02:57,280 We will be together no matter what. 72 00:02:57,305 --> 00:02:58,864 I will move to England. 73 00:02:58,889 --> 00:03:01,568 Oh, actually, you'd love Bungleton. 74 00:03:01,593 --> 00:03:03,385 It's out in the countryside. 75 00:03:03,409 --> 00:03:06,030 There's chickens roaming free, fresh eggs every morning. 76 00:03:06,055 --> 00:03:08,309 Whoa, whoa, whoa. Nobody's going to Bungleton, all right? 77 00:03:08,334 --> 00:03:09,592 And nobody's eating eggs. 78 00:03:09,617 --> 00:03:11,049 You're staying right here on Long Island, 79 00:03:11,074 --> 00:03:13,338 where we keep the chickens in some kind of camp 80 00:03:13,363 --> 00:03:15,237 piled up on top of each other. 81 00:03:15,729 --> 00:03:17,696 Yeah, well, how are we supposed to do that? 82 00:03:17,721 --> 00:03:19,058 You didn't file the paperwork. 83 00:03:19,083 --> 00:03:21,784 Yeah, I know. I made a mistake, all right? But I will fix it. 84 00:03:21,809 --> 00:03:24,997 - And you know why? - Because we're the Gables! 85 00:03:26,708 --> 00:03:28,567 No. 86 00:03:29,223 --> 00:03:31,845 Because I have a connection to someone down at Immigration, 87 00:03:31,870 --> 00:03:33,208 and I'll take care of it, okay? 88 00:03:33,233 --> 00:03:34,798 - Thanks, Dad. - Yes. 89 00:03:34,823 --> 00:03:36,489 Look, it's all gonna work out. 90 00:03:36,514 --> 00:03:37,980 Because we are the Gables. 91 00:03:38,005 --> 00:03:39,893 - Seriously, dude. - You gotta stop that. 92 00:03:41,643 --> 00:03:44,310 Cellucci, over here. 93 00:03:45,015 --> 00:03:46,727 Hey. 94 00:03:47,518 --> 00:03:49,217 How you doin'? 95 00:03:49,242 --> 00:03:50,358 Everything okay? 96 00:03:50,383 --> 00:03:52,599 Yes, yeah. I'm doin' great. 97 00:03:52,624 --> 00:03:54,983 Okay, good. Well, look at you with the beard. 98 00:03:55,008 --> 00:03:57,404 - Yeah, it looks good, right? - No. 99 00:03:58,757 --> 00:04:00,123 You know who you look like? 100 00:04:00,148 --> 00:04:02,335 You look like the guy... oh, God, what's his name? 101 00:04:02,360 --> 00:04:03,731 I can see his face. 102 00:04:03,756 --> 00:04:06,313 Come on, you know the guy from the, um... ah! 103 00:04:06,338 --> 00:04:08,025 - Hugh Jackman? - No. By the way, 104 00:04:08,050 --> 00:04:09,833 I wouldn't think you looked like Hugh Jackman 105 00:04:09,858 --> 00:04:11,877 if you had claws shooting out of your knuckles. 106 00:04:12,662 --> 00:04:13,828 All right. 107 00:04:13,853 --> 00:04:15,381 So what's up? What can I do? 108 00:04:15,406 --> 00:04:18,823 Kendra's fiancé has a bit of an immigration problem. 109 00:04:18,848 --> 00:04:20,782 And I remember when we were on the force together, 110 00:04:20,807 --> 00:04:24,607 you dated a guy, I think he worked at INS, am I right? 111 00:04:24,632 --> 00:04:26,600 No. Mm. 112 00:04:26,892 --> 00:04:28,683 Pretty sure you did. 113 00:04:28,946 --> 00:04:34,422 Okay... I dated a manager from CVS, but no INS. 114 00:04:35,154 --> 00:04:38,320 Are you sure? 'Cause... first, you dated a lot, 115 00:04:38,345 --> 00:04:40,796 and I just had the feeling that there was an immigration guy 116 00:04:40,821 --> 00:04:43,812 - sprinkled in there. - Okay! 117 00:04:43,837 --> 00:04:47,174 I think I would remember who I date. 118 00:04:47,199 --> 00:04:48,573 Oh, Robert. Actually, you're right, you're right. 119 00:04:48,598 --> 00:04:49,422 Yeah, see? Yes. 120 00:04:49,447 --> 00:04:51,651 I remember. Yes, yes. 121 00:04:51,969 --> 00:04:53,676 Can you do me a favor and call him? 122 00:04:53,701 --> 00:04:56,170 Oh, call him... 123 00:04:56,575 --> 00:04:58,533 Oh, what happened? 124 00:04:58,558 --> 00:05:01,259 Um, this one was not me. 125 00:05:01,284 --> 00:05:03,192 This was all him. 126 00:05:03,217 --> 00:05:05,081 We would go to the Outback Steakhouse 127 00:05:05,106 --> 00:05:08,559 and he would order with a bad Australian accent. 128 00:05:08,645 --> 00:05:12,354 "I'll take the Bloomin' Onion, mate!" 129 00:05:12,778 --> 00:05:15,512 You're... you're broken. You are so broken. 130 00:05:16,039 --> 00:05:18,101 All right, well, I gotta figure out something, 131 00:05:18,126 --> 00:05:20,109 otherwise Kendra's gonna be movin' to England. 132 00:05:20,134 --> 00:05:22,486 Okay, you know what? I have been blowing this guy off 133 00:05:22,511 --> 00:05:25,344 for three years, but for you, I will call him. 134 00:05:25,392 --> 00:05:26,858 Oh! 135 00:05:26,883 --> 00:05:29,317 I just figured out who you look like! 136 00:05:29,342 --> 00:05:31,979 - Who? - Pavarotti! 137 00:05:37,698 --> 00:05:39,016 Do you think he really went to the bathroom 138 00:05:39,041 --> 00:05:42,091 or is he secretly running a background check on me? 139 00:05:42,116 --> 00:05:45,637 Well, he had a key attached to a giant wooden paddle, so... 140 00:05:45,662 --> 00:05:47,723 I'm guessing bathroom. 141 00:05:48,348 --> 00:05:50,381 Just stay calm. Vanessa talked to the guy. 142 00:05:50,406 --> 00:05:52,039 It's gonna be fine. 143 00:05:54,454 --> 00:05:56,500 - Thank you for waiting. - Not a problem. 144 00:05:56,525 --> 00:05:58,828 Uh, by the way, Vanessa Cellucci says hello. 145 00:05:58,853 --> 00:06:01,586 Oh, Vanessa. We spoke on the phone. 146 00:06:01,611 --> 00:06:05,367 Can you believe she spent three years helping kids overseas? 147 00:06:05,473 --> 00:06:08,116 She's a real saint, that one. 148 00:06:08,926 --> 00:06:10,999 We're, uh, we're supposed to go to dinner tonight. 149 00:06:11,024 --> 00:06:14,041 Hey, I hear she loves that Outback Steakhouse, huh? 150 00:06:14,120 --> 00:06:16,220 Already made the reservation, mate. 151 00:06:16,245 --> 00:06:19,179 Now... 152 00:06:19,204 --> 00:06:22,068 Let me see if I can provide some assistance in this matter, 153 00:06:22,093 --> 00:06:22,827 Mr. Witt? 154 00:06:22,852 --> 00:06:25,086 Yes, Chale Eugene Witt. 155 00:06:25,111 --> 00:06:27,079 Okay, I just need to verify some information. 156 00:06:27,104 --> 00:06:29,738 Are you still living at 2257 Seville Lane? 157 00:06:29,763 --> 00:06:31,330 Yes. Yes, we are. 158 00:06:31,355 --> 00:06:34,129 Wait a minute, you... you live together? 159 00:06:34,455 --> 00:06:36,555 No, he... he lives in my garage. 160 00:06:36,580 --> 00:06:38,947 Oh, well, it's listed here as an apartment. 161 00:06:38,972 --> 00:06:40,403 Is this a legal residence? 162 00:06:40,428 --> 00:06:43,062 Legal? Uh, you know, as far as the permits and stuff, 163 00:06:43,087 --> 00:06:45,701 I kinda wanted to fly under the radar. 164 00:06:46,159 --> 00:06:47,690 But it is up to code? 165 00:06:47,715 --> 00:06:50,182 Yes, yeah, definitely up to code. 166 00:06:50,504 --> 00:06:53,205 It's my code, but it's up there. 167 00:06:53,230 --> 00:06:54,657 Yeah, same address. We're at the same... 168 00:06:54,682 --> 00:06:56,249 Okay, then he pays rent? 169 00:06:56,274 --> 00:06:59,219 In your dreams. 170 00:07:00,868 --> 00:07:03,757 Why... why is that funny, Mr. Gable? 171 00:07:03,781 --> 00:07:05,617 Oh, I'm sorry, it's just an inside joke we have 172 00:07:05,642 --> 00:07:06,841 'cause he's usually unemployed. 173 00:07:06,866 --> 00:07:09,300 Oh, well, it says here that you are employed. 174 00:07:09,791 --> 00:07:13,835 Well, I was. I was working for a tech startup. 175 00:07:13,968 --> 00:07:15,434 Okay, and how long were you there? 176 00:07:15,459 --> 00:07:17,896 Let's see... October, November... 177 00:07:17,921 --> 00:07:20,733 I was there for a week and a half. 178 00:07:22,909 --> 00:07:25,948 You know, I have some, uh, some concerns. 179 00:07:26,147 --> 00:07:28,630 Since you are a friend of Vanessa's, 180 00:07:28,655 --> 00:07:30,855 I think we can extend your visa. 181 00:07:32,338 --> 00:07:34,939 That's... that's a great call right there, you know. 182 00:07:34,964 --> 00:07:36,401 It's not like he's a terrorist or something. 183 00:07:36,426 --> 00:07:38,226 You're not... are you, you little terrorist? 184 00:07:38,251 --> 00:07:40,618 You little terrorist. 185 00:07:43,405 --> 00:07:46,740 So we, uh, do we sign something, or just we can go? 186 00:07:46,765 --> 00:07:48,531 We're free to go, right? I think we get out of here, 187 00:07:48,556 --> 00:07:50,387 wanna get some ice cream? 188 00:07:52,258 --> 00:07:55,868 Mr. Gable, I did not bring up terrorism. 189 00:07:55,892 --> 00:07:56,829 Is there a reason you did? 190 00:07:56,854 --> 00:07:58,687 N-no. No, I was saying he's not a terrorist. 191 00:07:58,712 --> 00:08:00,178 He's harmless. I mean, he... 192 00:08:00,203 --> 00:08:02,610 He spends all day in my garage, right? 193 00:08:02,635 --> 00:08:03,704 Working out those little formulas 194 00:08:03,729 --> 00:08:04,814 on his crazy little white board. 195 00:08:04,839 --> 00:08:06,529 Mr. Gable, please stop talking! 196 00:08:07,402 --> 00:08:08,801 I'll stop talking. 197 00:08:11,774 --> 00:08:14,598 In 36 hours, they can kick me out of the country. 198 00:08:14,623 --> 00:08:16,763 There's nothing I can do about it. 199 00:08:16,788 --> 00:08:18,807 Hey, on the positive, it's nice to know our government 200 00:08:18,832 --> 00:08:21,421 takes immigration pretty seriously. 201 00:08:21,881 --> 00:08:23,787 I will take comfort in that thought 202 00:08:23,812 --> 00:08:25,275 on the barge ride back to England. 203 00:08:25,300 --> 00:08:27,026 Well, what if we get married, you know? 204 00:08:27,051 --> 00:08:29,511 - That'll make you a citizen. - By tomorrow? 205 00:08:29,535 --> 00:08:31,435 Yeah. Chale, I love you, okay? 206 00:08:31,460 --> 00:08:33,231 We can just run down to city hall and do it. 207 00:08:33,256 --> 00:08:34,955 Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait a sec. 208 00:08:34,980 --> 00:08:37,226 - I realize part of this is my fault. - Part? 209 00:08:37,251 --> 00:08:39,462 Okay, let's not point fingers, all right? 210 00:08:39,487 --> 00:08:40,721 But don't you want to get married the way 211 00:08:40,746 --> 00:08:41,877 we always talked about? 212 00:08:41,902 --> 00:08:43,479 Right? The church, Father Philip, 213 00:08:43,504 --> 00:08:45,037 your mother's dress? 214 00:08:45,062 --> 00:08:47,539 Yeah, of course, but, I mean, how are we gonna pull that off 215 00:08:47,564 --> 00:08:48,905 by tomorrow night? 216 00:08:48,930 --> 00:08:51,843 We have a whole day. All right? 217 00:08:51,868 --> 00:08:53,993 Look, this wedding is happening. 218 00:08:54,315 --> 00:08:57,116 I'm not losing my daughter, all right? You wanna know why? 219 00:08:57,141 --> 00:08:58,540 We're the Gables. 220 00:08:58,565 --> 00:08:59,931 Exactly. 221 00:09:00,307 --> 00:09:02,876 We're the... oh, crap. I missed it again! 222 00:09:05,298 --> 00:09:08,516 No, I need the flowers today. It's my wedding. 223 00:09:08,541 --> 00:09:11,766 I know it's last minute, but is there anything you can do? 224 00:09:12,362 --> 00:09:14,062 Hey. What's going on? 225 00:09:14,087 --> 00:09:15,525 I heard you're changing the wedding plans 226 00:09:15,550 --> 00:09:17,891 without consulting the best man? 227 00:09:17,916 --> 00:09:19,983 There are rules, missy. 228 00:09:20,272 --> 00:09:23,173 No, no, no, please, please don't put me on hold. Oh, crap. 229 00:09:23,198 --> 00:09:24,464 I had the whole thing planned. 230 00:09:24,489 --> 00:09:26,422 Okay, Uncle Kyle, I really can't do this right now. 231 00:09:26,447 --> 00:09:27,975 I had the whole thing planned. 232 00:09:28,000 --> 00:09:29,708 Kyle, I can't do this right now either, all right? 233 00:09:29,733 --> 00:09:30,952 Just go to work and I'll tell you what's happening, okay? 234 00:09:30,977 --> 00:09:32,827 All right, fine, but don't call me the best man, all right? 235 00:09:32,852 --> 00:09:35,586 Call me "the nobody ever tells me anything" man. 236 00:09:38,389 --> 00:09:39,988 All right, I got a church lined up. 237 00:09:40,013 --> 00:09:41,579 The only problem is, Father Philip is out 238 00:09:41,604 --> 00:09:43,204 in Patchogue, so I'm gonna swing out there and pick him up. 239 00:09:43,229 --> 00:09:44,695 What? No, why can't you just call him? 240 00:09:44,720 --> 00:09:48,055 He's on some kind of retreat, and they... I guess no phones. 241 00:09:49,114 --> 00:09:50,223 Hey. 242 00:09:50,377 --> 00:09:52,510 How did you mess up at Immigration? 243 00:09:52,535 --> 00:09:54,848 I had to eat two Bloomin' Onions! 244 00:09:55,679 --> 00:09:57,579 It got away from me, but it's all right. 245 00:09:57,604 --> 00:09:59,237 Change in plans, they're getting married. 246 00:09:59,262 --> 00:10:01,563 But Dad, my dress doesn't fit and we have no flowers. 247 00:10:01,588 --> 00:10:03,350 I don't know how we're going to pull this off by tonight. 248 00:10:03,375 --> 00:10:04,574 Honey, please, do not get upset. 249 00:10:04,599 --> 00:10:05,999 In fact, I think you should get ready to smile. 250 00:10:06,024 --> 00:10:08,357 Because when I get back here, I'll fix your dress. 251 00:10:08,382 --> 00:10:09,360 I'll take care of everything. 252 00:10:09,385 --> 00:10:10,492 All right, do you want your hair blown out? 253 00:10:10,517 --> 00:10:11,683 I'll blow it out. I'll blow 'em all out. 254 00:10:11,708 --> 00:10:13,304 I'm gonna go crazy. I'll pluck your eyebrows. 255 00:10:13,329 --> 00:10:16,900 I'll pluck the crap out of them. I promise. You're gonna be fine. 256 00:10:16,925 --> 00:10:18,925 I'll paint your nails. I'll put little Met symbols on there. 257 00:10:18,950 --> 00:10:20,244 We're gonna be good. 258 00:10:20,269 --> 00:10:22,236 You're gonna love it. I think I'm gonna cry. 259 00:10:22,261 --> 00:10:23,928 Me, too. It's gonna be an emotional day. 260 00:10:23,953 --> 00:10:26,020 - I think I'm happy about it. - Okay, no. Stop. Stop all this. 261 00:10:26,045 --> 00:10:27,367 Stop all this nonsense, okay? 262 00:10:27,392 --> 00:10:28,984 I will take care of this. 263 00:10:29,009 --> 00:10:30,742 You've already screwed this up enough. 264 00:10:30,767 --> 00:10:32,534 So you just get the priest, and I'll handle the rest. 265 00:10:32,559 --> 00:10:34,726 Go, go. 266 00:10:34,751 --> 00:10:36,611 Am I still blowing out your hair, or is she gonna... 267 00:10:36,636 --> 00:10:38,757 Go! 268 00:10:53,284 --> 00:10:55,026 What kind of retreat is this? 269 00:11:00,710 --> 00:11:02,788 Goody? 270 00:11:03,571 --> 00:11:05,874 Goody, I see you. 271 00:11:07,482 --> 00:11:08,881 What are you doing here? 272 00:11:08,905 --> 00:11:11,954 It's a Civil War re-enactment, and my name's not Goody. 273 00:11:11,979 --> 00:11:14,382 Around here, I'm Private Lando Calrissian. 274 00:11:14,487 --> 00:11:17,221 Yeah, we get to pick our own names. 275 00:11:17,879 --> 00:11:19,913 I never knew you were a fan of the Civil War. 276 00:11:19,938 --> 00:11:22,933 Every black man's a fan of the Civil War. 277 00:11:23,809 --> 00:11:26,759 What are you doing here? I gotta find Father Philip. 278 00:11:26,784 --> 00:11:29,163 Oh, this year, he's fighting for the South. 279 00:11:29,188 --> 00:11:31,625 He's over in the command tent next to the meat smoker. 280 00:11:31,650 --> 00:11:33,383 The Confederates get brisket. 281 00:11:33,408 --> 00:11:35,324 Must be nice! 282 00:11:43,344 --> 00:11:44,543 Philip? 283 00:11:44,568 --> 00:11:46,769 Afraid you have me confused, son. 284 00:11:46,794 --> 00:11:48,614 I got an emergency, all right? 285 00:11:48,639 --> 00:11:51,265 Kendra and Chale... they need to get married today, 286 00:11:51,290 --> 00:11:53,798 or Chale's gonna be deported. You gotta come with me. 287 00:11:53,823 --> 00:11:57,353 Oh, you're killing me. I'm finally a general! 288 00:11:57,378 --> 00:11:59,758 I've been waiting 21 years for this. 289 00:11:59,783 --> 00:12:03,223 I get it. Donna always wanted you to be the one to marry them, 290 00:12:03,248 --> 00:12:05,915 just like you married us. This is my dream! 291 00:12:05,940 --> 00:12:07,865 Look, everybody has a dream, right? 292 00:12:07,890 --> 00:12:10,724 But you are in a field behind a Home Depot 293 00:12:10,749 --> 00:12:12,747 with a glue-on beard, so... 294 00:12:13,016 --> 00:12:15,110 Let me address my men. 295 00:12:15,135 --> 00:12:16,801 Great, great. Thank you very much. 296 00:12:16,826 --> 00:12:17,734 How long is that gonna take? 297 00:12:17,759 --> 00:12:20,210 Well, historically, I gotta give a speech, 298 00:12:20,235 --> 00:12:21,985 and he gets shot by friendly-fire, 299 00:12:22,010 --> 00:12:24,492 and then he gets an infection, dies a horrible death. 300 00:12:24,517 --> 00:12:25,789 Love it. Go to town. 301 00:12:28,398 --> 00:12:30,131 Thank you, sweetie. 302 00:12:30,156 --> 00:12:33,039 Okay, flowers done, dress done. 303 00:12:33,064 --> 00:12:34,963 Oh! I almost forgot. 304 00:12:38,224 --> 00:12:41,397 Welcome to your bachelorette party. 305 00:12:42,169 --> 00:12:44,836 All right, well, it's not exactly the one I envisioned. 306 00:12:44,861 --> 00:12:45,890 But I appreciate it. 307 00:12:45,915 --> 00:12:47,514 Hey, wait, do you want me to call a male dancer? 308 00:12:47,539 --> 00:12:50,440 I have a fireman, a policeman, a plumber. 309 00:12:50,465 --> 00:12:51,666 What's your fancy? 310 00:12:53,416 --> 00:12:54,658 You okay? 311 00:12:54,683 --> 00:12:56,962 You know, we've been talking about this wedding for so long 312 00:12:56,987 --> 00:12:59,323 and it was always just an idea, 313 00:12:59,348 --> 00:13:01,771 and now it's actually happening, and I'm kind of freaking out. 314 00:13:01,796 --> 00:13:04,130 Yeah, take it from someone 315 00:13:04,155 --> 00:13:06,143 who was supposed to be married four times... 316 00:13:06,168 --> 00:13:08,344 well, one doesn't actually count because 317 00:13:08,369 --> 00:13:10,503 I wasn't technically 18 yet. 318 00:13:10,528 --> 00:13:12,027 - What?! - But, uh, yes. 319 00:13:12,052 --> 00:13:14,105 My point is, 320 00:13:14,130 --> 00:13:18,299 can you imagine yourself without... 321 00:13:18,517 --> 00:13:19,816 What's his name? 322 00:13:19,841 --> 00:13:21,428 Chale. 323 00:13:21,859 --> 00:13:24,306 Can you imagine your life without Chale in it? 324 00:13:24,722 --> 00:13:26,969 No, I can't. 325 00:13:26,994 --> 00:13:29,399 Can you imagine your life with someone else? 326 00:13:29,425 --> 00:13:30,724 No. 327 00:13:31,098 --> 00:13:32,896 Well, there you go. 328 00:13:33,890 --> 00:13:35,969 Thank you for being here. 329 00:13:35,994 --> 00:13:37,194 You're welcome. 330 00:13:37,475 --> 00:13:39,008 Wait, did you say one of the strippers 331 00:13:39,033 --> 00:13:40,344 dances as a plumber? 332 00:13:40,369 --> 00:13:41,728 No, no, no, he is a plumber. 333 00:13:41,753 --> 00:13:43,759 He just likes to take his pants off. 334 00:13:45,187 --> 00:13:49,756 Come tomorrow, the sun may not shine upon our countenance, 335 00:13:49,781 --> 00:13:53,249 and surely, some of you will be called to embrace 336 00:13:53,274 --> 00:13:55,174 the greatest of mysteries. 337 00:13:55,294 --> 00:13:57,394 All right, come on. Pick it up. 338 00:13:57,419 --> 00:14:00,821 And in that undying land, our great solace shall be... 339 00:14:00,871 --> 00:14:02,530 How long does this go on for? 340 00:14:02,555 --> 00:14:03,929 About half an hour. 341 00:14:03,954 --> 00:14:05,382 Then the ice cream truck comes. 342 00:14:05,407 --> 00:14:07,597 Then we go to battle. Half an hour? 343 00:14:07,622 --> 00:14:09,600 Give me this! 344 00:14:09,625 --> 00:14:10,938 Bang! 345 00:14:11,790 --> 00:14:14,478 Bang, bang, you're dead. Come on. Let's get going. 346 00:14:14,503 --> 00:14:17,804 Relax, men. Caught in the arm, totally superficial. 347 00:14:17,829 --> 00:14:19,069 Now... 348 00:14:20,252 --> 00:14:22,156 Oh, boy. 349 00:14:23,695 --> 00:14:27,661 No! 350 00:14:38,518 --> 00:14:40,518 All right, okay. 351 00:14:40,543 --> 00:14:42,788 You... Kevin, you got me. 352 00:14:44,379 --> 00:14:46,256 Nice one, dawg. 353 00:14:46,281 --> 00:14:47,972 All right, men! 354 00:14:47,997 --> 00:14:50,726 The time has come for battle! 355 00:14:52,910 --> 00:14:54,572 Ooh, ice cream truck. 356 00:14:59,879 --> 00:15:02,158 All right, Chale, it's completely normal that you're nervous. 357 00:15:02,183 --> 00:15:03,816 And it's the anxiety that's giving you stomach pain. 358 00:15:04,377 --> 00:15:06,132 I don't think it's that, Jack. 359 00:15:06,157 --> 00:15:08,050 Well, I looked it up online, and it's either that 360 00:15:08,075 --> 00:15:10,034 or you've got a ruptured ovary. 361 00:15:12,892 --> 00:15:15,359 All right, my dad's got Father Philip. 362 00:15:15,384 --> 00:15:17,705 We got the dress, we got the flowers. 363 00:15:17,730 --> 00:15:19,010 Looks like you're stuck with me. 364 00:15:19,035 --> 00:15:20,801 Yay, wonderful. Oh! 365 00:15:20,826 --> 00:15:24,052 Sorry, darling, I'm just feeling a little bit out of sorts. 366 00:15:24,077 --> 00:15:26,611 Wait, what? Okay, wait. What's going on here? 367 00:15:26,636 --> 00:15:28,403 Are you... are you, like, getting cold feet? 368 00:15:28,428 --> 00:15:29,762 It's his ovaries. 369 00:15:31,152 --> 00:15:32,956 Okay, no, babe. 370 00:15:32,981 --> 00:15:35,110 You need to talk to me. 371 00:15:35,135 --> 00:15:36,558 Do you not wanna do this? 372 00:15:36,583 --> 00:15:38,065 No, of course I do. 373 00:15:38,090 --> 00:15:39,465 Because if you don't, we don't have to. 374 00:15:39,490 --> 00:15:41,790 No, no, no, no. No, I... look, 375 00:15:41,815 --> 00:15:44,366 I have always known that I wanted to marry you. 376 00:15:44,391 --> 00:15:46,992 I-I knew two days before we ever met. 377 00:15:47,017 --> 00:15:48,883 How is that even possible? 378 00:15:48,908 --> 00:15:52,076 I was in the engineering building, you were in the quad, 379 00:15:52,101 --> 00:15:54,754 and I followed you back to your dorm 380 00:15:54,779 --> 00:15:56,371 staring at the back of your head, whispering... 381 00:15:56,396 --> 00:15:59,213 "I am gonna marry that girl." 382 00:16:00,390 --> 00:16:03,213 That's a little creepy, but so sweet. 383 00:16:03,238 --> 00:16:04,688 I love you, Chale. 384 00:16:04,713 --> 00:16:07,844 Hey, I love... ow, ow, ow. Aah! 385 00:16:07,869 --> 00:16:09,220 - What... - Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. 386 00:16:09,245 --> 00:16:10,494 Hey, what's going on? 387 00:16:10,519 --> 00:16:12,916 Oh, my stomach's killing me. Aah! 388 00:16:12,941 --> 00:16:15,313 Let me see. Let me see. Does this hurt? 389 00:16:15,338 --> 00:16:17,463 It... Yes, yeah, yeah. Okay. You know what, baby? 390 00:16:17,488 --> 00:16:19,187 I don't think a wedding is gonna happen. 391 00:16:19,212 --> 00:16:20,564 This might be his appendix. 392 00:16:20,589 --> 00:16:22,066 - What? - We gotta take him to the hospital. 393 00:16:22,091 --> 00:16:23,917 - Yes, right now. Let's go. - Ow, ow. 394 00:16:23,942 --> 00:16:26,143 Come on, I'll help you up. 395 00:16:26,728 --> 00:16:28,490 Somebody call a plumber? 396 00:16:40,723 --> 00:16:42,556 Surprise. 397 00:16:46,308 --> 00:16:49,317 Hey. Hey, how you feelin'? 398 00:16:49,342 --> 00:16:52,978 Oh, a bit woozy. What happened? 399 00:16:53,003 --> 00:16:57,015 You had appendicitis, and they had to do emergency surgery. 400 00:16:57,040 --> 00:16:59,829 So that's it? We're... we're not gonna make it. 401 00:16:59,854 --> 00:17:01,192 I'm gonna get deported. 402 00:17:01,217 --> 00:17:02,973 No, no, no. It's okay, sweetheart, okay? 403 00:17:02,998 --> 00:17:05,825 I'm coming with you. We're going to Bungleton. 404 00:17:06,326 --> 00:17:08,903 Full disclosure, Bungleton is... 405 00:17:08,928 --> 00:17:11,573 not as beautiful as it sounds. 406 00:17:12,979 --> 00:17:15,626 Hey. We got a priest, we got a best man, 407 00:17:15,651 --> 00:17:17,537 - we're doing a wedding. - Wait, what? 408 00:17:17,562 --> 00:17:19,272 Yeah, and I got the wedding dress. 409 00:17:19,297 --> 00:17:20,998 There you go, huh? 410 00:17:21,023 --> 00:17:23,882 Uh, Mr. Gable, I don't think I can make it to the church. 411 00:17:23,907 --> 00:17:25,240 I'm sorry. 412 00:17:25,265 --> 00:17:27,234 Look, Father, is there any way we can marry them here? 413 00:17:27,260 --> 00:17:30,852 Oh, well, not in the room, but maybe they have a chapel. 414 00:17:30,877 --> 00:17:32,595 Yeah, yeah, uh, 415 00:17:32,826 --> 00:17:34,525 give me five minutes. 416 00:17:34,575 --> 00:17:36,475 Let me show you why I'm the best man. 417 00:17:36,500 --> 00:17:39,134 Let's go, people. I said gas leak. 418 00:17:39,159 --> 00:17:42,155 Not kidding around. Let's go. Move it out. 419 00:17:42,720 --> 00:17:45,407 Come on, Nana. Slap some hot sauce on it. Let's go. 420 00:17:45,432 --> 00:17:47,131 Pick up the pace. 421 00:17:49,430 --> 00:17:52,308 Here comes the bride. 422 00:17:54,610 --> 00:17:56,339 Wow. 423 00:17:56,938 --> 00:17:58,405 Well? 424 00:17:58,430 --> 00:18:00,140 Do you like it? 425 00:18:00,729 --> 00:18:03,791 You... you look beautiful. 426 00:18:04,119 --> 00:18:06,031 We... we went with the hair up 427 00:18:06,056 --> 00:18:07,595 'cause I thought it was a classier look. 428 00:18:07,620 --> 00:18:09,653 I used to wear it like this when, uh... 429 00:18:11,981 --> 00:18:14,752 You know what? This is not my moment. 430 00:18:14,776 --> 00:18:16,847 And I just realized that. 431 00:18:18,601 --> 00:18:20,685 I'll see ya at the chapel. 432 00:18:24,019 --> 00:18:25,535 When did this happen? 433 00:18:25,560 --> 00:18:28,812 It feels like just yesterday you were... 434 00:18:29,648 --> 00:18:31,414 you were different. 435 00:18:31,439 --> 00:18:34,440 You were my little peanut, you know? 436 00:18:34,465 --> 00:18:38,093 I remember, you would fit right in here just perfectly. 437 00:18:38,118 --> 00:18:40,185 And you'd fall asleep. 438 00:18:40,646 --> 00:18:42,668 And I just stayed up all night 439 00:18:43,160 --> 00:18:45,015 until you woke up. 440 00:18:45,040 --> 00:18:46,918 Dad. 441 00:18:47,880 --> 00:18:50,047 Oh, gosh, then you got older. 442 00:18:50,072 --> 00:18:51,681 And you remember that bike I got you? You know, 443 00:18:51,706 --> 00:18:54,008 the one with the streamers and I put that little bell on there? 444 00:18:54,033 --> 00:18:56,033 Then I took your training wheels off? 445 00:18:56,058 --> 00:18:58,345 Yeah, and then you pushed me into the street 446 00:18:58,370 --> 00:18:59,447 without any warning? 447 00:18:59,908 --> 00:19:03,104 Can you ride a bike or not? 448 00:19:04,450 --> 00:19:06,480 We're just missing one thing. 449 00:19:06,505 --> 00:19:08,338 I know. 450 00:19:08,363 --> 00:19:09,855 I wish Mom was here, too. 451 00:19:09,880 --> 00:19:11,146 I know. 452 00:19:11,894 --> 00:19:13,995 She'd be very proud of you. 453 00:19:15,709 --> 00:19:17,160 All right, well, time's ticking. 454 00:19:17,185 --> 00:19:19,686 Let's get you married, all right? Come on. 455 00:19:21,917 --> 00:19:23,416 On two. Ready. 456 00:19:23,441 --> 00:19:25,458 There we go. 457 00:19:25,483 --> 00:19:28,773 - You ready? - Yeah. 458 00:19:36,391 --> 00:19:38,524 I'm really sorry you're not getting the wedding 459 00:19:38,549 --> 00:19:39,979 you always wanted. 460 00:19:40,004 --> 00:19:42,171 Actually, Dad, I am. 461 00:19:42,196 --> 00:19:44,744 Thank you. You pulled it off. 462 00:19:44,769 --> 00:19:46,969 It's not perfect, 463 00:19:46,994 --> 00:19:49,522 but... it's perfect. 464 00:19:50,275 --> 00:19:51,860 Yeah. 465 00:19:54,093 --> 00:19:56,931 Boy, Chale really needs to tie up the back of that gown. 466 00:20:04,925 --> 00:20:07,923 Look, I know this isn't the reception we dreamed of, 467 00:20:07,948 --> 00:20:10,409 but much like the wedding, it was free. 468 00:20:14,043 --> 00:20:17,510 None of my business, but I would've hired a DJ. 469 00:20:20,804 --> 00:20:23,171 All right, gentlemen, I'm here to announce 470 00:20:23,196 --> 00:20:25,454 the General has died of sepsis. 471 00:20:25,479 --> 00:20:28,219 Not the greatest wedding toast. 472 00:20:32,844 --> 00:20:36,781 Well, look, wedding can't get any worse, right? 473 00:20:37,314 --> 00:20:39,155 Anyone call a plumber? 474 00:20:39,330 --> 00:20:46,483 - Synced and corrected by martythecrazy - - www.addic7ed.com -