1
00:00:46,129 --> 00:00:46,971
Soda water.

2
00:00:46,996 --> 00:00:48,643
- Lime wedge?
- Nah.

3
00:00:48,668 --> 00:00:50,231
Who am I trying to fool?

4
00:00:50,901 --> 00:00:52,340
Hey there.

5
00:00:54,071 --> 00:00:55,504
Hi.

6
00:00:55,906 --> 00:00:58,394
- Are you staying at the hotel?
- I am.

7
00:00:58,723 --> 00:01:00,322
Yeah, me, too, you know.

8
00:01:00,403 --> 00:01:02,488
I'm, I'm Curtis.

9
00:01:03,207 --> 00:01:04,346
Gretchen.

10
00:01:04,371 --> 00:01:07,403
Wow. I don't think I've ever
actually met a Gretchen.

11
00:01:07,997 --> 00:01:10,034
Well, Curtis, now you have.

12
00:01:10,059 --> 00:01:11,803
Yes, I have.

13
00:01:13,861 --> 00:01:16,768
So, are you...
are you here alone,

14
00:01:16,793 --> 00:01:18,239
or...?

15
00:01:19,091 --> 00:01:21,918
Yes, I... I am alone.

16
00:01:24,301 --> 00:01:27,569
I-I guess what I'm asking
in a larger sense is...

17
00:01:28,692 --> 00:01:29,589
single?

18
00:01:29,614 --> 00:01:32,754
Are you...
are you single?

19
00:01:35,094 --> 00:01:36,927
Single like a fox.

20
00:01:37,341 --> 00:01:41,275
Although, I did almost
get married once.

21
00:01:42,176 --> 00:01:43,621
Almost.

22
00:01:44,037 --> 00:01:48,207
Well, I mean, would you want to
tell me the story over a drink?

23
00:01:51,848 --> 00:01:53,081
Aw, fuck it.

24
00:01:53,106 --> 00:01:54,746
Whiskey, rocks.

25
00:01:55,257 --> 00:01:57,808
You live exactly once,
right, Curtis?

26
00:02:12,160 --> 00:02:17,371
www.subtitulamos.tv

27
00:02:39,720 --> 00:02:42,087
Okay, the final options
for Gretchen's.

28
00:02:42,112 --> 00:02:44,003
Walk Down the Aisle music.

29
00:02:44,028 --> 00:02:46,491
"Tubthumping" by Chumbawamba,
"Juicy," Biggie,

30
00:02:46,516 --> 00:02:48,151
"Poison" by Bell Biv DeVoe.

31
00:02:48,176 --> 00:02:51,069
As Shakespeare said, "Never
trust a big butt and a smile."

32
00:02:51,248 --> 00:02:52,648
"Freak on a Leash" by Korn,

33
00:02:52,673 --> 00:02:55,260
- "Marry Me" by Train.
- Nix that one.

34
00:02:55,285 --> 00:02:57,448
I don't want to ruin my mascara
crying too hard.

35
00:02:57,473 --> 00:02:58,948
"Sweet Child of Mine," GNR,

36
00:02:58,973 --> 00:03:00,456
"Relax" by Frankie Goes
To Hollywood.

37
00:03:00,480 --> 00:03:02,559
- You do know that's about butt sex?
- I do.

38
00:03:02,933 --> 00:03:04,440
Madonna, "Like A Virgin,"

39
00:03:04,465 --> 00:03:06,735
"2 Become 1," Spice Girls.
Aw.

40
00:03:06,914 --> 00:03:10,182
"Sabotage," Beastie Boys,
"Waterfalls," TLC.

41
00:03:10,207 --> 00:03:12,760
Too sad. AIDS.
Change it to "No Scrubs."

42
00:03:13,195 --> 00:03:15,720
"Pop That Pussy" by 2 Live Crew,

43
00:03:15,745 --> 00:03:17,697
"Girls Just Want to Have Lunch"
by Weird Al,

44
00:03:17,722 --> 00:03:19,414
"Maneater" by Hall and Oates

45
00:03:19,439 --> 00:03:20,842
and "Cherry Pie" by Warrant.

46
00:03:20,867 --> 00:03:22,839
- Great list.
- Greatest list.

47
00:03:22,864 --> 00:03:24,096
So, shall we winnow it down?

48
00:03:24,121 --> 00:03:26,447
Gonna have to winnow
lata, playa.

49
00:03:26,472 --> 00:03:28,439
I have to head into the office

50
00:03:28,464 --> 00:03:31,089
before the shitstorm
du jour starts.

51
00:03:32,410 --> 00:03:33,970
Aw, damn it!

52
00:03:33,995 --> 00:03:36,214
Calgon, right?

53
00:03:36,393 --> 00:03:38,510
Anyway, office drahms.

54
00:03:38,535 --> 00:03:40,885
Debbie's inner-ear problem
is flaring up,

55
00:03:40,910 --> 00:03:42,502
so she's always weaving
when she walks.

56
00:03:42,527 --> 00:03:45,183
And Mike's cat's butt is jacked

57
00:03:45,208 --> 00:03:47,220
after she had
all those baby cats.

58
00:03:47,417 --> 00:03:49,228
Blah, blah, blah.
Work shit.

59
00:03:49,261 --> 00:03:53,174
Yeah, yeah, mi-might I remind
you that your first wedding

60
00:03:53,199 --> 00:03:55,444
is but five days away,

61
00:03:55,469 --> 00:03:58,228
and we still need to choose
the font for the name cards

62
00:03:58,253 --> 00:04:00,749
and pick a punny name
for our signature cocktail.

63
00:04:00,774 --> 00:04:02,619
And we're totally gonna do
all that bullshit,

64
00:04:02,643 --> 00:04:05,564
but again, supes swamped
at wiz-erk.

65
00:04:05,589 --> 00:04:08,135
Yeah, no, that's actually fine,
'cause Edgar and I

66
00:04:08,160 --> 00:04:10,988
have our notes "phoner"
with the studio today.

67
00:04:11,013 --> 00:04:14,546
Because we finished the script.
Which I told you about already.

68
00:04:14,571 --> 00:04:17,605
At which time
your reaction was similarly,

69
00:04:17,708 --> 00:04:19,275
dishearteningly muted.

70
00:04:19,300 --> 00:04:21,167
Cool, bud. See ya.

71
00:04:25,272 --> 00:04:26,283
What?

72
00:04:26,308 --> 00:04:27,589
Nothing.

73
00:04:27,614 --> 00:04:28,830
It just doesn't seem like

74
00:04:28,855 --> 00:04:31,247
- Gretchen's very excited about the wedding.
- Edgar.

75
00:04:31,271 --> 00:04:34,416
As clearly evidenced
by not even having time

76
00:04:34,441 --> 00:04:37,900
to close the front door,
Gretchen is incredibly busy

77
00:04:37,925 --> 00:04:39,978
with important work things.

78
00:05:40,340 --> 00:05:42,503
- Hi.
- Hey, everybody.

79
00:05:42,528 --> 00:05:44,527
Hey, guys. Sheila here.

80
00:05:45,835 --> 00:05:47,635
Hi, Sheila.

81
00:05:47,660 --> 00:05:49,831
We just... Are we just waiting
for everyone else, or...?

82
00:05:50,016 --> 00:05:51,911
We just wanted to say

83
00:05:51,935 --> 00:05:53,620
you two did a great job.

84
00:05:54,925 --> 00:05:57,206
Hey, Sheila, it's Edgar.

85
00:05:57,231 --> 00:06:00,472
We're just a little confused.

86
00:06:00,610 --> 00:06:02,260
Isn't this a notes call?

87
00:06:02,285 --> 00:06:04,779
Yeah, it sounds like
our wires got crossed.

88
00:06:04,804 --> 00:06:07,808
No, we're all set.
Again, amazing work.

89
00:06:07,988 --> 00:06:11,216
So, then, th-the next step
would be...?

90
00:06:11,241 --> 00:06:12,986
Absolutely. Take care, guys.

91
00:06:19,128 --> 00:06:22,252
No notes? Boom!

92
00:06:22,277 --> 00:06:23,481
I don't know, Jimmy.

93
00:06:23,506 --> 00:06:25,941
No notes isn't really a thing,
remember?

94
00:06:25,966 --> 00:06:27,733
I'm gonna call my agent.

95
00:06:28,191 --> 00:06:30,120
No, Jimmy.

96
00:06:31,292 --> 00:06:32,816
Check Deadline.

97
00:06:35,112 --> 00:06:36,525
Hi, Grace.

98
00:06:36,550 --> 00:06:40,097
The studio's hired Diablo Cody

99
00:06:40,122 --> 00:06:41,863
to adapt my book?!

100
00:06:44,481 --> 00:06:47,048
But we already wrote it.

101
00:06:47,073 --> 00:06:48,970
They probably just
kicked you a draft

102
00:06:48,995 --> 00:06:50,586
to keep the relationship good
while you finish

103
00:06:50,610 --> 00:06:51,976
the other two Peach books.

104
00:06:52,001 --> 00:06:53,564
Sort of how Tom gets
"story by" credit

105
00:06:53,589 --> 00:06:54,656
on all the Reachers.

106
00:06:54,910 --> 00:06:56,915
Guess I haven't seen you
in a while, huh?

107
00:06:56,940 --> 00:06:59,410
My dad sobered up
and found religion for us.

108
00:06:59,435 --> 00:07:01,413
Now I get to wear
this cool sailor's costume,

109
00:07:01,438 --> 00:07:03,580
and I live in a room
above a GameStop on Sunset

110
00:07:03,605 --> 00:07:04,431
with four other children.

111
00:07:04,456 --> 00:07:05,581
I left word.

112
00:07:06,147 --> 00:07:07,919
Hey, you know what
I just caught on cable?

113
00:07:08,171 --> 00:07:09,171
Jack Reacher.

114
00:07:09,196 --> 00:07:10,621
It's really good.

115
00:07:10,646 --> 00:07:11,988
You should tell people
it's good.

116
00:07:12,013 --> 00:07:13,790
Can I count on you to
tell people it's good, Jimmy?

117
00:07:13,815 --> 00:07:18,201
Another great living novelist
felled by the studio system,

118
00:07:18,515 --> 00:07:21,149
Like F. Scott Fitzgerald
or Chuck Palahniuk.

119
00:07:21,518 --> 00:07:23,800
How utterly cliché.

120
00:07:25,245 --> 00:07:28,324
Well, at least my better half
is still gainfully employed.

121
00:07:35,356 --> 00:07:36,886
You got the shit?

122
00:07:43,003 --> 00:07:44,957
Why can't I meet you
somewhere normal?

123
00:07:44,981 --> 00:07:46,391
Hit me with the hot work goss.

124
00:07:46,416 --> 00:07:49,722
It turns out, Mike's cat
actually has hemorrhoids.

125
00:07:50,270 --> 00:07:52,441
Debbie took a header
coming out of the bathroom.

126
00:07:53,356 --> 00:07:56,218
Yvette's still a giant bitch
for firing you.

127
00:07:56,243 --> 00:07:58,675
- How's Toilet?
- How would I know?

128
00:07:59,214 --> 00:08:00,681
He's great. Okay?

129
00:08:00,706 --> 00:08:03,236
Gretch, I can't keep doing this.
I think these papers

130
00:08:03,261 --> 00:08:05,354
you're making me steal
may be important.

131
00:08:05,379 --> 00:08:07,779
If they were so important,
why are they in the trash?

132
00:08:07,804 --> 00:08:10,138
Jimmy's never once
looked at your work stuff.

133
00:08:10,163 --> 00:08:11,683
Why do you need Caliber papers

134
00:08:11,708 --> 00:08:13,535
to make him believe
you weren't canned?

135
00:08:13,560 --> 00:08:15,320
I can't let him know
I am losing it

136
00:08:15,345 --> 00:08:16,541
right before the wedding.

137
00:08:16,566 --> 00:08:18,156
I'll tell him after.

138
00:08:18,258 --> 00:08:19,724
Divorce is so much paperwork.

139
00:08:19,749 --> 00:08:21,053
He'll never get around
to that shit.

140
00:08:21,078 --> 00:08:22,745
Stupid Yvette.

141
00:08:22,770 --> 00:08:25,995
I mean, who fires someone right
before their wedding?

142
00:08:26,520 --> 00:08:27,986
You know what?

143
00:08:28,011 --> 00:08:31,597
I am going to march in there
and chew her ass out for you.

144
00:08:31,694 --> 00:08:33,963
Plus, it's only four episodes,

145
00:08:33,988 --> 00:08:36,291
so we can probably watch
it all tonight.

146
00:08:38,104 --> 00:08:39,650
Let's order Thai.

147
00:08:39,675 --> 00:08:41,803
Okay. Hey.

148
00:08:41,828 --> 00:08:43,515
You know what else we should do?

149
00:08:43,540 --> 00:08:45,707
- Rehire Gretchen.
- What?

150
00:08:49,992 --> 00:08:52,269
Hey, where'd your butt go?

151
00:08:52,456 --> 00:08:54,932
I understand that Gretchen
is your friend,

152
00:08:54,957 --> 00:08:56,995
but she royally screwed up.

153
00:08:58,291 --> 00:08:59,581
Did she, though?

154
00:09:00,292 --> 00:09:02,442
She set off
a fire alarm to avoid

155
00:09:02,467 --> 00:09:04,567
disappointing
one of her clients.

156
00:09:04,902 --> 00:09:06,811
That is insane.

157
00:09:07,300 --> 00:09:09,402
I feel like you're upset.

158
00:09:09,756 --> 00:09:12,119
So what color curry
should we get tonight?

159
00:09:12,144 --> 00:09:15,025
Yellow? Red? Blue?

160
00:09:15,050 --> 00:09:16,838
Something came up.

161
00:09:17,214 --> 00:09:18,441
Just now?

162
00:09:19,550 --> 00:09:21,300
Okay.

163
00:09:36,855 --> 00:09:41,512
My own creation,
ripped from my heaving bosom.

164
00:09:42,503 --> 00:09:43,878
No!

165
00:09:44,734 --> 00:09:47,445
Edgar, be a dear and answer
this, will you?

166
00:09:47,470 --> 00:09:49,775
Whoever it is
won't stop calling,

167
00:09:49,800 --> 00:09:51,588
and I'm far too distressed

168
00:09:51,613 --> 00:09:54,275
to synthesize
any sort of cogent thought.

169
00:09:54,300 --> 00:09:56,088
Jimmy's phone. This is Edgar.

170
00:09:56,113 --> 00:09:57,390
Hold on.

171
00:09:57,414 --> 00:09:58,791
The caterer wants
to know if you want

172
00:09:58,815 --> 00:10:00,933
red or white quinoa
in the farro salad.

173
00:10:04,441 --> 00:10:06,135
We'll get back to you.

174
00:10:07,831 --> 00:10:09,425
I'm gonna ask Gretchen.

175
00:10:12,589 --> 00:10:13,722
Caliber PR.

176
00:10:13,747 --> 00:10:16,050
Hi. Gretchen Cutler's
office, please?

177
00:10:21,042 --> 00:10:23,181
You are hearing
this prepared statement

178
00:10:23,206 --> 00:10:25,447
because you called
for Gretchen Cutler,

179
00:10:25,472 --> 00:10:27,931
whose employment
was terminated immediately

180
00:10:27,956 --> 00:10:29,908
upon the incident on the 12th.

181
00:10:29,933 --> 00:10:33,414
If Ms. Cutler has personally
injured or assaul...

182
00:10:39,886 --> 00:10:41,386
I left word.

183
00:10:53,265 --> 00:10:55,144
Good girl.

184
00:11:00,021 --> 00:11:01,720
Time for sleepies.

185
00:11:01,877 --> 00:11:04,377
You get some sleep, okay?
Good night.

186
00:11:12,355 --> 00:11:14,666
Hey, you want to help me
find a new apartment?

187
00:11:14,691 --> 00:11:18,191
Bec and I talked Paul into
springing for a sweet Airbnb.

188
00:11:18,230 --> 00:11:19,544
"For the baby." Oops.

189
00:11:19,646 --> 00:11:21,223
I'm supposed
to do the quotes in my head.

190
00:11:21,247 --> 00:11:23,964
- I have a secret.
- Hell, yeah.

191
00:11:24,027 --> 00:11:25,777
Love secrets. Lay it on me.

192
00:11:25,802 --> 00:11:27,652
I'm a lesbian now.

193
00:11:29,065 --> 00:11:30,339
That's...

194
00:11:32,075 --> 00:11:33,089
That's...

195
00:11:34,706 --> 00:11:36,254
That's amazing.

196
00:11:36,279 --> 00:11:39,488
I am so honored that you would
trust me with this. Come here.

197
00:11:40,408 --> 00:11:42,572
You outed yourself
to the right hombre.

198
00:11:42,597 --> 00:11:44,158
I'm sort of a lezbo expert.

199
00:11:44,183 --> 00:11:46,599
Not 'cause I'm cranked up
by the idea of two ladies

200
00:11:46,624 --> 00:11:49,291
smushing their titties and boxes
together and whatnots,

201
00:11:49,316 --> 00:11:51,853
- but on account of my two moms.
- Your what, now?

202
00:11:52,019 --> 00:11:54,989
Me being born dead
was mad stressful on my folks.

203
00:11:55,014 --> 00:11:57,068
I survived,
but their marriage didn't.

204
00:11:57,093 --> 00:11:58,476
But it was a stealth blessing

205
00:11:58,501 --> 00:12:00,666
'cause it turns out
my mom is super gay.

206
00:12:00,691 --> 00:12:02,547
And you turned out like this?

207
00:12:02,572 --> 00:12:05,039
Right. That's why I'm so mad
fucking sensitive.

208
00:12:05,064 --> 00:12:06,864
I like Yvette so much.

209
00:12:07,269 --> 00:12:10,995
I've never felt this way about
anyone, not even Dave Navarro.

210
00:12:11,020 --> 00:12:12,486
Plus, I've never dated a woman,

211
00:12:12,511 --> 00:12:14,565
so I don't know
if I'm doing any of this right.

212
00:12:14,667 --> 00:12:17,589
Okay. Let's run through
your relaish right quick.

213
00:12:20,816 --> 00:12:23,816
- When was your last hike?
- Never.

214
00:12:24,791 --> 00:12:26,688
Which Costco do you guys
belong to together?

215
00:12:26,713 --> 00:12:28,760
- None.
- Have you seen Fun Home?

216
00:12:29,488 --> 00:12:30,939
How many flannels do you own?

217
00:12:31,644 --> 00:12:33,635
Which Subaru have you test-driven?

218
00:12:33,660 --> 00:12:36,166
- Zero.
- How much did you donate to NPR last year?

219
00:12:36,191 --> 00:12:37,549
What's NPR?

220
00:12:37,706 --> 00:12:39,619
What's your favorite
Tegan and Sara album?

221
00:12:39,644 --> 00:12:42,310
- Who?
- Has she made you a chili?

222
00:12:42,335 --> 00:12:45,408
- What?
- A chili... beans, meat, a tomato base.

223
00:12:45,433 --> 00:12:48,291
- A chili, goddamn it.
- We haven't made a chili.

224
00:12:48,316 --> 00:12:49,495
That's it!

225
00:12:49,861 --> 00:12:51,728
You need to do something
to let her know

226
00:12:51,761 --> 00:12:54,097
that you're serious
about being a lesbian.

227
00:13:05,792 --> 00:13:07,894
Three, two...

228
00:13:08,628 --> 00:13:10,448
Wheel of Fortune!

229
00:13:10,473 --> 00:13:12,874
Home just in time for Wheel.

230
00:13:12,976 --> 00:13:14,750
Pretty impressive
how I have my commute

231
00:13:14,775 --> 00:13:16,775
timed so perfectly, Jimbo?

232
00:13:18,972 --> 00:13:21,843
Another crazy one at work today.

233
00:13:21,868 --> 00:13:23,728
You know, Debbie,
from accounting?

234
00:13:23,753 --> 00:13:26,814
She ate shit coming
out of the bathroom.

235
00:13:26,839 --> 00:13:29,761
Really fucked herself up.
Super funny.

236
00:13:29,794 --> 00:13:32,761
Also, Mike's cat's butt
exploded.

237
00:13:35,800 --> 00:13:38,167
Don't you want
to know what's wrong?

238
00:13:39,562 --> 00:13:41,095
Of course.

239
00:13:41,995 --> 00:13:45,478
I was essentially fired
off my own movie,

240
00:13:45,503 --> 00:13:50,236
only to be rewritten
by Diablo Cody. Diablo Cody.

241
00:13:50,261 --> 00:13:52,179
- Juno.
- I do know.

242
00:13:52,359 --> 00:13:55,636
Ever since, I've been
in a depressive spiral.

243
00:13:56,573 --> 00:13:59,652
I hope that you can
still love me through this.

244
00:14:02,714 --> 00:14:04,972
There, there, bud.

245
00:14:05,221 --> 00:14:06,681
It'll be okay.

246
00:14:07,033 --> 00:14:09,760
You know,
I really underestimated

247
00:14:09,785 --> 00:14:14,222
the amount of psychic pain
that depression can inflict.

248
00:14:14,885 --> 00:14:18,285
This really puts your past
flare-ups into context.

249
00:14:18,800 --> 00:14:20,636
It really does.

250
00:14:58,333 --> 00:14:59,824
Hey, Gretchen.

251
00:15:01,983 --> 00:15:03,253
Hello there.

252
00:15:04,893 --> 00:15:06,018
How are you?

253
00:15:07,581 --> 00:15:09,213
So good.

254
00:15:09,238 --> 00:15:12,252
Work is B-A-N-A-N-A-S.

255
00:15:12,277 --> 00:15:16,316
Debbie from accounting died, so
there's a cake for that later.

256
00:15:16,341 --> 00:15:19,192
And my assistant Mike's cat
has a robot butt.

257
00:15:19,217 --> 00:15:21,270
You know, cool work stuff.

258
00:15:28,590 --> 00:15:29,698
All right.

259
00:15:31,887 --> 00:15:33,044
See ya.

260
00:15:33,317 --> 00:15:35,854
? The bells are ringing ?

261
00:15:35,879 --> 00:15:38,495
? For me and my gal ?

262
00:15:38,520 --> 00:15:41,659
? The birds are singing ?

263
00:15:41,684 --> 00:15:44,261
? For me and my gal ?

264
00:15:44,286 --> 00:15:47,273
? Everybody been knowing ?

265
00:15:47,298 --> 00:15:50,887
? To a wedding we're goin'. ?

266
00:15:51,840 --> 00:15:54,144
I've done it.
I bested my depression.

267
00:15:54,169 --> 00:15:57,816
Gretchen, I gazed
into the eye of the great void

268
00:15:57,841 --> 00:15:59,308
and I said, "Nay",

269
00:15:59,333 --> 00:16:01,842
you shan't take me today, void."

270
00:16:02,575 --> 00:16:04,308
Sorry for being such a bummer yesterday.

271
00:16:04,333 --> 00:16:05,995
It was really quite
selfish of me

272
00:16:06,020 --> 00:16:08,876
to burden you
with my sadness like that.

273
00:16:08,901 --> 00:16:10,698
- No worries.
- And now I wholly

274
00:16:10,730 --> 00:16:13,300
empathize with your experience
of depression.

275
00:16:13,325 --> 00:16:15,750
I'm just glad those dark days
are behind us.

276
00:16:15,775 --> 00:16:18,026
- Anyways, I really got to get to...
- I am gonna seize

277
00:16:18,051 --> 00:16:22,637
this glorious day to take care
of manifold wedding tasks.

278
00:16:22,662 --> 00:16:24,490
I can't believe we're getting
married in four days.

279
00:16:24,515 --> 00:16:27,706
- Same. - I'm also gonna
take my tux to get pressed.

280
00:16:27,731 --> 00:16:29,230
Would you like me
to take your dress, as well?

281
00:16:29,255 --> 00:16:30,759
Don't worry, I won't peek at it.

282
00:16:30,784 --> 00:16:32,917
- Actually, I don't have one.
- What's that?

283
00:16:32,942 --> 00:16:35,433
No dress, homeboy.
I've been busy.

284
00:16:35,458 --> 00:16:37,917
Work. Got to go, so busy.

285
00:16:37,942 --> 00:16:40,628
Debbie go boom,
cat butt turn for worse.

286
00:16:40,653 --> 00:16:41,869
Bye.

287
00:16:47,775 --> 00:16:49,028
Work it.

288
00:16:49,958 --> 00:16:53,222
Remind the DA that while Lil'
Reba claims in every interview

289
00:16:53,247 --> 00:16:55,746
to be "moving bricks,"
she's nine years old.

290
00:16:55,771 --> 00:16:57,893
Then leak to the source
that Reba is quote:

291
00:16:57,917 --> 00:16:59,879
"Hard as shit and has been
flipping packs

292
00:16:59,904 --> 00:17:00,944
since she was six."

293
00:17:00,969 --> 00:17:03,089
Okay? Yes, and...

294
00:17:04,566 --> 00:17:06,369
Let me call you back.

295
00:17:06,942 --> 00:17:08,956
Lindsay, please.
I really don't have

296
00:17:08,981 --> 00:17:11,067
- time for your...
- Ta-da.

297
00:17:11,614 --> 00:17:12,679
Dear God.

298
00:17:12,704 --> 00:17:14,225
I really like you, Yvette.

299
00:17:14,257 --> 00:17:16,292
I want to go hiking to Costco

300
00:17:16,317 --> 00:17:18,151
with you and buy chili stuff.

301
00:17:18,403 --> 00:17:19,770
Let's make a chili.

302
00:17:19,795 --> 00:17:23,050
Did you seriously think
that putting on

303
00:17:23,075 --> 00:17:26,973
some lesbian minstrel show
would convince me to... what?

304
00:17:27,831 --> 00:17:29,739
I don't even know what you want.

305
00:17:31,395 --> 00:17:33,581
- I want you.
- You're not gay.

306
00:17:33,683 --> 00:17:35,980
Not to mention the fact
that you had an agenda

307
00:17:36,005 --> 00:17:37,471
to get Gretchen hired back.

308
00:17:37,496 --> 00:17:40,718
That's not true! We squished
boxes before you fired Gretchen.

309
00:17:40,743 --> 00:17:42,421
Don't hire her back;
I don't care.

310
00:17:42,445 --> 00:17:44,245
I'm sorry, Lindsay.

311
00:17:44,270 --> 00:17:46,629
Okay, you're right,
maybe I am trying hard

312
00:17:46,654 --> 00:17:49,266
but that's because I love you
so quit the bullshit

313
00:17:49,291 --> 00:17:52,450
and tell me you love me back or
I'll stab you, you fucking cunt.

314
00:17:56,542 --> 00:17:57,908
You know what?

315
00:17:58,087 --> 00:17:59,353
You're fired.

316
00:17:59,378 --> 00:18:00,744
You can't fire me.

317
00:18:00,769 --> 00:18:02,667
There are literal hours
of security footage

318
00:18:02,692 --> 00:18:05,604
of you stealing confidential
documents from the shred bin.

319
00:18:05,636 --> 00:18:07,316
You mean the locked trash?

320
00:18:07,341 --> 00:18:09,518
You also just threatened
to stab me.

321
00:18:10,473 --> 00:18:12,759
- I'm gonna...
- Yeah.

322
00:18:16,579 --> 00:18:19,433
So what am I looking at,
severance package-wise?

323
00:18:19,458 --> 00:18:20,525
Just around?

324
00:18:20,550 --> 00:18:22,278
Ballpark it for me is fine.

325
00:18:36,914 --> 00:18:39,254
- Yo, you got the papers?
- No, Gretchen.

326
00:18:39,279 --> 00:18:40,784
I don't have your papers.

327
00:18:40,809 --> 00:18:43,895
- I quit.
- What? Why?

328
00:18:43,920 --> 00:18:46,717
For you, in solidarity.
I thought you'd be happy.

329
00:18:46,742 --> 00:18:48,609
Four days, Lindsay.

330
00:18:48,788 --> 00:18:51,222
You couldn't hold on
for four Goddamn more days?

331
00:18:51,247 --> 00:18:53,724
No! This has gone too far.

332
00:18:53,749 --> 00:18:56,247
Just tell Jimmy the truth.

333
00:18:56,272 --> 00:18:58,770
If someone really loves you,
they don't get mad,

334
00:18:58,795 --> 00:19:00,333
no matter what you tell them.

335
00:19:00,504 --> 00:19:02,180
Here, watch.

336
00:19:03,199 --> 00:19:05,245
I've been sleeping with Yvette.

337
00:19:05,347 --> 00:19:08,425
And also, I didn't quit;
she fired me.

338
00:19:08,450 --> 00:19:09,480
See?

339
00:19:09,505 --> 00:19:12,012
And I ate her butt.
See? No one cares.

340
00:19:12,037 --> 00:19:14,948
Yvette? You were literally
sleeping with the enemy!

341
00:19:15,051 --> 00:19:16,214
You're not gay.

342
00:19:16,239 --> 00:19:18,753
Well, I thought maybe I was
for a second because I'm lost.

343
00:19:18,778 --> 00:19:19,848
Jesus.

344
00:19:20,445 --> 00:19:22,895
Changed my mind,
maybe you shouldn't tell Jimmy.

345
00:19:22,920 --> 00:19:25,145
Also, she wasn't the enemy.

346
00:19:25,536 --> 00:19:28,543
You actually did
screw up pretty bad.

347
00:19:28,568 --> 00:19:31,340
You caused, like, a hundred
grand worth of water damage

348
00:19:31,365 --> 00:19:33,070
- to that club.
- You sound like a narc.

349
00:19:33,095 --> 00:19:35,374
You're a giant narc bitch
and I have somewhere to be.

350
00:19:35,399 --> 00:19:37,903
- Narc.
- Well, you're a tiny bitch.

351
00:19:37,928 --> 00:19:39,527
And I have nowhere to be.

352
00:19:39,552 --> 00:19:42,129
And you didn't even say
anything about my hair.

353
00:19:42,154 --> 00:19:43,809
It's Paul hair.

354
00:19:45,200 --> 00:19:46,878
What are you doing later?

355
00:19:46,903 --> 00:19:48,769
I don't know! Call me!

356
00:20:06,536 --> 00:20:09,518
Hi. My friend's a klepto and I
think she just stole a dog.

357
00:20:09,542 --> 00:20:11,709
What? No.

358
00:20:12,333 --> 00:20:14,583
These doggos
are all up for adoption

359
00:20:14,608 --> 00:20:16,651
or walking.
We're here every week.

360
00:20:16,676 --> 00:20:19,722
You know, most people
do this for the dogs,

361
00:20:19,747 --> 00:20:21,179
but something tells me
that chick needs

362
00:20:21,203 --> 00:20:23,048
these walks
more than the dogs do.

363
00:20:23,072 --> 00:20:25,384
Some of the dogs actually get
bummed when she shows up.

364
00:20:25,408 --> 00:20:26,952
Like they can smell
the desperation.

365
00:20:26,976 --> 00:20:28,559
Just give me a dog, man.

366
00:20:29,745 --> 00:20:31,996
Make it a real badass one.

367
00:20:44,465 --> 00:20:46,200
You following me, narc?

368
00:20:46,690 --> 00:20:48,623
I'm worried about you, Gretchen.

369
00:20:48,648 --> 00:20:51,081
Why? I'm doing great.

370
00:20:51,581 --> 00:20:53,333
Look how good I am at fetch.

371
00:20:56,329 --> 00:20:58,629
What were you looking for
in the garbage this morning?

372
00:20:58,654 --> 00:21:00,966
- Mind your own business, Edgar.
- You made it my business

373
00:21:00,991 --> 00:21:02,568
when you started
stealing my meds.

374
00:21:02,611 --> 00:21:04,189
- Meds you don't use.
- I don't use them

375
00:21:04,213 --> 00:21:07,412
because they were messing me
up and they're prescribed to me.

376
00:21:07,437 --> 00:21:08,947
Who knows what
they're doing to you.

377
00:21:08,972 --> 00:21:10,154
I do.

378
00:21:10,367 --> 00:21:12,331
They're making life bearable.

379
00:21:12,356 --> 00:21:15,149
Are you insane, monitoring me?

380
00:21:15,174 --> 00:21:18,242
My parents did that
and they were my parents.

381
00:21:18,267 --> 00:21:20,322
And I rejected them
forever for it.

382
00:21:20,661 --> 00:21:23,113
You're just... you.

383
00:21:23,285 --> 00:21:25,469
Like, who the fuck are you even?

384
00:21:25,606 --> 00:21:29,856
Maybe the best thing
for everyone

385
00:21:30,012 --> 00:21:31,905
would be for you

386
00:21:31,930 --> 00:21:35,098
to get the hell out
of our lives for good!

387
00:21:35,589 --> 00:21:37,522
I know you got fired.

388
00:21:40,937 --> 00:21:42,086
Please don't tell Jimmy.

389
00:21:42,111 --> 00:21:44,145
Jimmy doesn't care
about your job.

390
00:21:44,170 --> 00:21:46,604
Edgar, I am begging you.

391
00:21:46,706 --> 00:21:48,215
Don't tell Jimmy.

392
00:21:48,240 --> 00:21:51,333
He will leave me again
and this time, he won't be

393
00:21:51,358 --> 00:21:53,580
- wrong to do it.
- Gretchen, Jesus.

394
00:21:53,605 --> 00:21:56,139
I was really trying at work.

395
00:21:58,117 --> 00:22:00,083
And I still blew it.

396
00:22:01,483 --> 00:22:04,318
Even when I try, I fail.

397
00:22:04,507 --> 00:22:06,926
I always fail.

398
00:22:07,645 --> 00:22:09,761
And I can't fail with Jimmy.

399
00:22:09,786 --> 00:22:12,340
I just... can't.

400
00:22:13,449 --> 00:22:14,840
I won't tell him.

401
00:22:16,202 --> 00:22:19,136
But don't you think
you should be able to?

402
00:22:23,944 --> 00:22:26,098
I'm sorry.

403
00:22:39,864 --> 00:22:43,995
Goddamn, homey, work was
straight cray again today.

404
00:22:44,020 --> 00:22:46,847
But I am so stoked I made it
home in time for...

405
00:22:46,872 --> 00:22:48,676
What's up, Jimmy?

406
00:22:51,199 --> 00:22:52,713
Jimmy.

407
00:22:52,738 --> 00:22:54,114
What?

408
00:23:13,175 --> 00:23:14,741
I got you a wedding dress.

409
00:23:24,278 --> 00:23:25,395
What the...

410
00:23:25,451 --> 00:23:28,494
Jimmy, that's exactly the dress
I didn't know I needed.

411
00:23:28,519 --> 00:23:29,685
How did you...?

412
00:23:31,644 --> 00:23:33,028
Beat it.

413
00:23:36,161 --> 00:23:38,260
- Can you unzip me, mister?
- Yes, just go.

414
00:23:41,254 --> 00:23:44,692
Obviously we'll have it
taken in significantly.

415
00:23:44,905 --> 00:23:46,637
Thank you.

416
00:23:48,488 --> 00:23:50,270
I got fired.

417
00:23:52,372 --> 00:23:54,058
Well, that's okay.

418
00:23:54,760 --> 00:23:55,853
Really?

419
00:23:55,878 --> 00:23:57,845
Yeah, we'll figure it out.

420
00:23:57,979 --> 00:24:01,567
And if not, Edgar can give us
homeless advice.

421
00:24:02,875 --> 00:24:05,286
Actually, I got fired,
like, two weeks ago.

422
00:24:05,311 --> 00:24:07,022
I've just been pretending to go
to work

423
00:24:07,046 --> 00:24:10,011
like some prideful
Japanese businessman.

424
00:24:10,036 --> 00:24:11,955
Also I stopped talking
to my therapist

425
00:24:12,001 --> 00:24:14,112
and I've been taking
a bunch of random pills.

426
00:24:14,136 --> 00:24:17,214
And even though
I have literally nothing to do,

427
00:24:17,239 --> 00:24:18,984
I just can't bear
to bring myself

428
00:24:19,008 --> 00:24:21,426
to do a single thing
for this wedding.

429
00:24:23,059 --> 00:24:25,926
Our wedding is gonna be amazing.

430
00:24:29,626 --> 00:24:36,007
www.subtitulamos.tv