My name's Vincent.
You got a brother?
Hey!
He owes everybody in New York City.
Thoroughbred like you, we would own this damn street.
I'm gonna keep what I earn. I don't need you.
I don't need anybody else to hold my money for me.
I'm a student, NYU.
I have a test in the morning, I just needed something
to stay awake so I could study.
- First time in New York? - Does it show?
Not everybody gets to be successful, but you're gonna be.
Darlene, ain't no laying back tonight. You hear me?
All for you, daddy.
It's raining, C.C. I don't want to work tonight.
When I say to get out there, it'll be 'til you do it.
You gimme my goddamn money.
Sandy Koufax, freak of nature.
Hank Greenberg, freak of nature.
Mike "Super Jew" Epstein, 1969 Washington Senators,
403 at-bats, 30 homers, 85 RBls.
You know why they call him Super Jew?
'Cause he's the only one.
Did you ever hear anyone talk
about Mickey "Super Gentile" Mantle?
Or Willie "Super Coon" Mays? No offense.
- We should head out. - Cock-sucking anti-Semitic...
Roberto "Super Spic" Clemente.
Grossman, what are you getting your ass all up in the air for?
Your people are about the mind.
We're about the mind, huh? Why am I on the job?
All right, who's good?
The Ho Patrol? Include me out.
Fine, you two just play nice.
We'll pick you up on the rebound.
What's he talking about? We're always nice.
- Take them to Missouri, Matt. - Yee-haw.
Jews are great at chess, right? The Russians?
God damn it, Roy, who built the pyramids?
Ho patrol!
Wagon!
- Hey, hey, hey. How you doing, honey? - Ladies, ladies, ladies!
- Everyone against the van. - Shit!
- Against the van now. - Keep moving, Bunny.
Listen up, I want to see property vouchers
from central booking.
Anyone not collared in the last 48 hours, you know the drill.
- Show and prove, ladies. - You ain't got to show them shit.
Actually they do, genius.
Ain't you read the Constitution?
Careful with those meat hooks.
I'm delicate like a teacup.
All right, let me see. You're good.
- Fucked up. - You're good.
Sorry, in you go.
- For crying out loud. - In you go.
- I'm going! - You're treating them like cattle.
And you should talk. Let me see. In you go.
- A sold-out show tonight, ladies. - In you go, Thunder.
God damn, Flanagan, I got it right here.
It was stamped the 28th. Today's the 31st.
It's the 30th. There ain't no April 31st.
30 days in September, April, June, December.
April, Marshal Dillon.
All right, we'll catch you later.
Have a good night, Officer.
- In you go. - Hear that?
Where's your wedding ring, Flanagan?
I don't like the way it looks on my hand.
Take a seat.
Can we stop at the Rexall? I need mouthwash.
Tell Loretta I'm gonna be down there.
Play nice, ladies.
- sync and corrections by Mr. C - - www.addic7ed.com -
A nationwide strike by air controllers in Canada...
Good.
Okay...
Yeah. That's amazing.
Lie down on the bed.
No, no, no, spread out, like a... like a lioness.
Oh, yeah, that's... that's good.
Yeah, that's good.
You got fabulous tits.
Oh, yeah, there you go.
Uh, put your left arm down, honey.
Yeah, that's great. Yeah, good.
Good.
All right.
Yeah, I think we got it.
All right.
Boy...
What now?
You sign your name and number on the back of these,
and I hand them out to some of the fellas.
They like what they see, they give you a call.
This is for an audition, right, you said?
Yeah, it's acting. It's movies.
A lot of stars got their start this way.
You'd be surprised who.
Plus, you know, some of your friends are doing it.
You got concerns, ask around.
Ask who?
Loretta, for one. Shay, two.
Um, you know, that colored girl.
- Ruby? - No, not Thunderthighs.
No, the little one with all the hair.
Darlene never said nothing to me.
Hey, I've seen her in action myself
on one of those machines they got
down at the fat man's bookstore on the Deuce.
She's getting it doggie style.
That'll be 40.
What, for real?
Film is expensive. My time?
The money you're gonna earning, your man'll thank me.
You got real attributes, sweetheart.
You're gonna be very popular.
Hey.
- Ladies. - Vin.
This place is busy.
This hour, it's still the office trade.
- Crowd changes later on. - The 1-4 got the wagon out.
- Damn near made a mess of my night. - Sorry to hear it.
First one's on me, but you gotta be discreet.
I don't mind your business, but Kim don't like you bringing it in here.
Not this early in the night, at least.
Off duty, Scout's honor.
Um... seltzer water with lime.
Tom Collins for me, baby.
You got it.
- Candy, baby? - Mm-hmm.
What do "discreet" mean?
Um, means don't be flashing tits and ass,
making trade in here.
That's what I thought it mean.
- Here you go. - Vince, my man.
You got some pimp in you.
It's a compliment.
Thanks.
Look at you sloppy, gold-shield grubbing motherfuckers.
Make some room, ladies.
We're now the drunk wagon.
- Hey, Haddix. - Shove over, Barb.
- 30 and 10. - 30 and 5, all in.
I'm not bargaining.
Hey.
Where you been, girl?
Photo shoot with Bernie Wolf.
- Your man know about that? - C.C. told me to.
He said I should add more tools to my toolbox.
Well, Bernie'll get you work.
So, what's it like, Shay?
Well, I'm just starting. Loretta can tell you.
She's been sunlighting all year.
- Really? - What's sunlighting?
Making movies during the day.
- For the machines. - Yeah.
- But you only get paid once. - Same as a trick.
No, every time some guy puts a coin in one of those machines,
someone's making money off what you did
and you're not making another dime.
But you do it, Darlene, right?
- Not regular. - No?
Larry asked me to make a movie with a man.
- But it was just for that man. - Uh-huh, shit.
So he could look at it later.
He paid me extra.
Hold on.
Did this man fuck you from behind?
How you know that?
Bernie said he saw it at Fat Mooney's.
- No, no, that can't be. - What? Bernie said.
Well, I'm gonna see about that right now.
Hey, I'm gonna go with you. I gotta talk to Mooney, too.
She's pissed.
- I gotta piss like a racehorse. - Hold the door.
What are you looking at?
Yeah, you shake your head at me all you want, Rizzi.
Meanwhile, I make more money than you day in, day out.
My wife makes more money than me.
Oh, yeah? She do half-and-half, too?
- That's what they tell me. - All right with the mouth.
I'm a number nine with lobster sauce.
Number nine already comes with lobster sauce.
- Are you saying you want extra? - Yes, please.
- $3.75. - Eggrolls for me, baby.
Eggrolls. And you?
Barb, look at the menu.
I'll come back.
Hey, Moon.
Darlene. What you need?
A movie of myself.
I heard you're running it in the machine over there.
Could be. I don't know.
And I'm guessing you got copies people can buy, too.
I'll have to check the inventory.
Do that.
I only have two left.
You're very popular.
"Back Door Betty"? How much you sell these for?
50 to chumps, 35 to regulars. Why?
Where do they come from? Who puts them out?
Who?
What are you, an owl? Whose movie is it?
Darlene, what do you want, an address?
- I don't fucking know. - You don't know?
You may have heard, but it's illegal to have sex for money,
and it's illegal to sell pictures of people having sex for money.
I mean, cheesecake, yeah, okay,
but the hard-core stuff stays in paper bags.
I can't even put it out in the store.
So "who"? Not a sensible question for me.
Where do you get them from?
I get them.
Look, take them, you want.
I don't care. Go.
Go.
Buy one back from me. 10 bucks.
Jesus, Darlene.
It's the least you can do.
Here you go, Mooney. I'm looking for work.
Give it to one of those guys in the movie business
you don't know.
Girl, Ashley didn't need Bernie Wolf.
Reggie shot those for free.
Abe Attell, Benny Leonard, Battling Levinsky,
Barney Ross, Slapsy Maxie Rosenbloom.
Hold on, hold on, I don't even know
what the fuck sport you're even talking about right now.
Boxing, asshole.
Boxing? Jesus, Mary, Joseph.
- Uncle, already. - All right, be that way.
- Larry do that to you? - I'm serious, you win.
Now shut the fuck up or I'm walking away.
You want to save me from myself?
'Cause you can.
How about you just go home?
To the Bronx?
Shit.
Still, this your only move?
Oh, shit. You know what?
I completely forgot to get an education.
You believe that?
Grossman, Haddix,
y'all better get inside.
Lieu's about five minutes out.
All right, let's move.
Everything goes in a can.
I gotta pee.
Destry rides again?
You guys did a good job tonight.
We got a couple raids coming up... bookstores.
You in?
You're in.
Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, no!
Ma, this piece is missing from this game.
I told you, it doesn't work without all the parts.
You told me.
What, you want me to run right out to Macy's or something?
No, I didn't say that.
We still have that old game of yours.
- "Mystery Date." Remember that one? - What game?
Your chance to meet the man of your dreams.
I'm sure we got all the pieces to that one.
You want me to dig it out?
That's not a game for boys.
Hey, let's play cards, okay?
- You got a deck in your room? - Mm-hmm.
- Now you're dead. - Aw!
I don't get it, Vince.
Why would you quit Dominic's place around the corner
and go with a Chink on the other side of the river?
Yeah.
Because to Dom, I'm always just the fucking help.
Kim, he don't know what the fuck's going on, so I'm in charge.
- It's like my own place. - Yeah, except it ain't.
Just saying.
Plus a lot of shit going on across the river,
Times Square, the action, tourists,
celebrities now and then.
Jerry Van Dyke came into the bar the other night,
ordered a mai tai.
Jerry?
Yeah, Jerry Van Dyke. "My Mother the Car"?
Jerry Van Dyke.
Shit, I was in Di Fara's.
Dick Van Dyke's in front of me ordering a slice.
- Dick Van Dyke? - Yeah, sausage and onion.
The fuck you doing jerking off Jerry Van Dyke
on the wrong fucking side of the river?
Bullshit on Dick Van Dyke eating pizza on Avenue J.
Bullshit? Fucking true. Sausage and onion.
Looked he was about ready to sing "Chim Chimney" any fucking second.
Yeah.
I'm doing something at the Korean place
to make me some real money.
I pulled 700 on my take last weekend.
700? Shit, I should be a barman.
Yeah, you're doing fine where you are.
- You just made foreman. - There's never enough.
I got a lot of chicks in the nest.
Well, try leaving our sister alone for a minute.
Yeah, or maybe putting a condiment on it.
What'd you do with the Chink bar?
Dresses up the waitresses.
- Yeah. - Hey...
They're wearing underwear,
bending over, spilling on you.
Not underwear. Leotards.
- Leotards, huh? - Yeah.
Girls look hot?
Hey, Bobby, you would fuck me twice to fuck them once.
I think I might stop in this week.
We're still working that site over on 2nd not too far away.
Hey, you're married with children
and lawn furniture, fucko.
- You got a mortgage. - It's okay to look.
Just a venial sin.
Fuck me, you just used "venial" in a sentence?
Oh!
I'm not his mother. He needs you.
I'm doing the best I can.
I tell him you live in Washington,
that you work for the government
and it's a secret what you do.
It's good for him to think you're doing something important.
You know, next time you go to the department store,
buy him a game or something.
They got one called "Operation."
Yet get to pretend you're a doctor.
It buzzes. Kids really like it.
Maybe that'll inspire him.
He might grow up to be a doctor.
Or a lawyer.
Or whatever.
I appreciate everything.
Eileen...
you take care of yourself.
Whoo! Vince.
That guy just tipped me 20 on a single 7 and 7.
If I knew he'd like me that much,
I'd have given him a better pour.
He doesn't like you, El. He likes how you present.
Just saying.
First round's on me, Vinnie.
Hey.
Fucking hot out there in the sun today.
- Well, it's cool in here. - Yeah, I know.
You and all this snatch walking around
and air conditioning in the bargain.
You weren't kidding.
This is something you could raise my rent for.
Don't get all worked up.
There's a topless bar out by the airport.
- Them girls is whores. - Yeah.
These are waitresses bringing me drinks.
It's... I don't know, different.
- Exactly. - That's right.
- It's like, uh, classy. - Whoa.
Tommy Longo.
- You know him? - Longo?
In the carting business.
- What the hell's carting? - Garbage trucks.
He's got construction contracts in the city.
Our site, for one.
Well, he's also a shylock.
Vinnie, you into Tommy Longo?
- Guess again. - Frankie, huh?
Yeah.
Well, pardon me while I go kiss
some familiar Italian ass.
On your way back cash this for me, will you?
Why don't they just give it to you in the morning so you can go to the bank?
Eh, the bosses figure if they pay us in the morning,
we'll wander off the job site and go get wrecked.
They're probably right.
By the time we get checks, there's no cash till Monday.
How much payroll do you got on the site?
I got 82 grand in payroll right now.
Sometimes more.
Can you get us, too, Vince?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're good.
Me, too.
- Give me a second. - Thanks, Vin.
You did some drastic shit there, I gotta say.
Yeah?
Minnesota ain't seen none of that?
That thing you do, I don't think
it's made it west of Pittsburgh yet.
Do you like this look?
I could wear my hair in a shag like that.
You know, I bet I could do what she does, too.
I mean, I act every night, don't I?
I'm good at it.
Baby, put that shit away.
Jane Fonda ain't got nothing on you.
I heard in that movie she ain't got no pimp.
You know that's bullshit, right?
It's fine for pretend,
but that won't work on the streets.
Can I confide something in you?
You know you can.
I ain't never verbalized this shit before
to man nor beast, so...
There ain't no individual on earth as alone as a pimp.
You try to make a family with your bitches, right?
But after while, most of them, they just want you to fail.
It's like a part of their nature.
So you wind up having to play all kinds of mind games
to keep them all in line, but nobody's fooling nobody.
They want your ass to fail.
The other pimps,
it's "brother this, brother that,"
but at the end of the day,
all they want to do is shanghai your stable.
The pigs, they want your money and your scalp,
and, God's truth, Lori, I'm...
I'm just sick and tired of the whole damn thing, you know?
The whole dog-eat-dog mentality, it...
You know, I've shown, improved myself out there
year in and year out, and right now,
all I need is one good woman, and I'm gone.
Yeah.
I'm taking off.
Making a proper home, have some babies,
kick back, see the world, that kind of shit.
You know what I'm saying?
- I like that. - You like that?
Yeah.
See, the thing is...
I can't do none of that until I make me a proper pile.
Until then, I'm gonna be out there
like a warrior for my scratch.
My chosen one will be an Amazon out there for my scratch.
See what I'm saying?
Hey.
Four last week.
Hoping for the same or more this week.
Doing what I can for you.
It's gonna be hard for you this week, I know.
Your brother's lucky streak in Queens ended abruptly...
I'm told.
Fuck me.
Mmm, till looks fat, though.
I don't steal from Kim. I told you.
You told me.
I'm working on it.
Now tonight, the room, the hotel clerk,
it's all paid for.
You just concentrate on the thing at hand.
First thing after the money, you check his Johnson.
That thing looks poxy, out he goes.
Do you really think you need to tell me about dick drip?
I've been doing this since I was 16.
I'm saying you're no good to me diseased, that's all.
Oh, one thing.
Uh, don't let him put himself inside you.
They'll just keep slamming you with the side of their hands.
You do the putting in, all right?
Save some wear and tear on that thing.
You know, it's like my mother used to say...
without your health, nothing else matters.
That's what Darren used to say to me.
You know, let me tell you something about your boy Darren
or Clem or Eefus or who the fuck.
He's a pimp like a crippled little-leaguer
is a Hall of fucking Famer, all right?
I'm a pimp.
Your first and last real man pimp, okay?
- Okay. - I'm a fucking pimp!
I hear you, Daddy.
Yeah?
Lori, check this out. Come here.
Yeah.
Now, you got a big day tonight,
so why don't you get yourself cleaned up
and get some beauty sleep, all right?
All right.
You, uh...
you ever been to France?
No?
Yeah, me neither.
Okay, I see what you're saying.
- Hey, Frankie. - Susie.
Crown Royal, if you please.
They'll be lining up every Friday.
What's good?
So as long as we have the cash on hand,
we're gonna do good.
- Whoa, what the fuck? - Oh.
- Tommy fuckin' Longo... - My twin brother Frankie.
That's the mook who starts all this.
What is this, "The Patty Duke Show"? Christ.
Brother's an interesting character,
not to mention, as we're all aware, a fucking degenerate.
Frankie's all right.
He's just got a little problem with the wagers is all.
Anyway, that's the offer, Mr. Pipilo.
Truth be told, we don't have the cash
to cover my brother's debt right now,
but we're gonna get it and deliver beyond what we owe.
Tell me again what we're talking about here.
How many on the payroll?
140, give or take.
And I bet there isn't a one of them who's happy.
Right now no one can take home money at the end of the week.
- They wait till Monday. - I get it.
You work in the office?
I have access to the payroll lists,
if that's what you're asking.
I know what your brother-in-law gets me.
Where do you figure in this?
Well, Bobby's the inside guy.
I'm the manager.
It's what I do... this place, every place I ever worked.
I will make sure that every penny
is accounted for, Mr. Pipilo.
It's a point of pride with me.
I'm gonna hold you to that.
Here's what I propose.
Rudy Pipilo's gonna be the bank.
The bank will take a 5% fee out of every check.
A guy opens his envelope on Friday, he'll find cash.
Also, I want four no-show jobs as well.
Bonus for my time.
You make that happen?
I'm gonna give you guys $1,000 a week, flat.
That's for you and Bobby here, for your time.
As for your fuck-nuts look-alike brother,
- he don't participate, understood? - Understood.
Any payoffs you gotta make, any other expense,
that comes out of your cut.
No late payments, no shorts.
Understood?
Understood.
One more cocktail, then you can walk me to my car.
Okay, Mr. Pipilo.
Rudy.
So, where you living, Vince?
Got a room at the Lionel. Convenient-like.
I got my own bathroom. I don't need much.
Yeah, but this neighborhood?
- Hey, Thunder. - Vince.
Punch boards come into the bar all time,
sometimes with their pimps.
But, hey, their money spends
and, end of the day, they gotta drink, too,
- just like anyone. - Stay close. Come on.
Odds on they're coming from a matinee.
Now, why should a man have to walk through all this human garbage
just to take his wife out on the town?
All these properties just sitting here, vacant.
You think this area's ever gonna grow
when you got this kind of environment here?
I don't know, Rudy.
I just go to work every day, make my nut.
Yeah. Someone's gotta clean this fucking place up.
Until that happens, ain't nothing gonna change.
Yeah, it's like water that kind of just sits there
in a puddle, stays grimy.
Standing water, right.
It's stagnant around here.
We gotta get the water moving again.
What, you got some interest down here or something?
Some. I'm working on some.
Here's my car. Vince...
make this right.
See you, Vince.
- Flapjacks for Miss Candy. - Thank you, baby.
You're welcome, darling.
You know what I'm talking about.
I had never seen such a tight series.
Can I get a match, girl?
I'm not your girl, bitch.
Is that a no?
Yeah.
Help a brother out here, Dolores.
I can't get no business all crowded up with everyone else.
'Shell, we can't just move seven blocks.
That's the 18th Precinct. Cops don't know you up there.
They'll pick you up as soon as you set foot on the corner.
A couple of trips in the wagon and we straight.
- Know what I'm saying? - Yeah?
What about the trade that's already up that way?
You think those other macks are just gonna let us move in?
That gets us both cut.
Richie, how about you ball up sometime?
Hey, my man Richie, one question...
you gonna throttle your bitch or you want me to do it for you?
Sunshine on my shoulders, Larry. It's all right.
- But thank you. - All right.
Hey, Mommy, how you doing?
Mmm.
- I'm good, Larry. - Yeah, you good?
I can look at you, tell you good.
You know, it's dangerous out here for a girl by yourself.
It's like walking a dog through a minefield.
You look like you need an escort.
- I do? - Yeah.
Rodney's been giving me this talk for a month now.
Rodney, Rodney. Look, Rodney cool.
He cool.
No, but he ain't got no sensitivity to him,
no intimacy.
He ain't curious about the human condition.
I'm curious about that shit all the day.
- Excuse me, Miss Motherfucking Bitch. - What?
Can't you see I'm talking here? Answer me.
Sorry.
Damn.
Like I was saying, Rodney ain't got no sensitivity to him.
Look, I don't do the hard sell, all right?
When the time comes, and it will come...
Mm.
You know where to find me.
That I do.
Show some respect for the young ladies
when you in my place of business, hear?
I hear you, stretch.
We good.
Apron-wearing motherfucker.
Listen, I need a solid.
It's just that, um...
I'm supposed to shoot a blue tomorrow up in the Bronx,
but I have to be in court.
It's $75.
75?
I can make that on the corner.
The hell you need to go all the way to the Bronx for?
For me.
I'm trying to get my ass off the street.
And if I totally hang this hang guy up,
I'm "person non gratis."
Come on.
When you were little, didn't you always want to be in the movies?
75...
For fuck's sake, say yes.
Yes. I'll make a fucking movie.
Thank you, baby.
- Larry, baby. - Yeah.
That movie you had me make with that John?
I went to Mooney's.
Fat Mooney?
He's selling it?
Just saying, I don't think nobody paid us
- except for that John. - All right.
I'm gonna look into it,
make sure we ain't get took advantage of.
I'm on it.
Plate's up, Maria. Plate's up.
Okay.
'Cause I don't think...
I said I'm on it.
Honestly...
I don't see how you could fail every class.
I mean, literature?
Abby, you love to read.
You can reapply next fall.
- If we write to... - I'm staying.
You're what?
I'm not going back home.
Your father's so upset with you right now.
He won't help you out.
I'm not asking for his help.
How are you going to live?
I don't know. How does anyone live?
I'll get a job.
I'm sorry, Mom.
I had a feeling.
You need money or you get in trouble,
you come to me, understand?
All right.
- Hey. - How you doing?
- McNally. - Hey.
That's the second time you've counted it.
- What the fuck? - Yeah? Maybe I make it three.
Tony, your gross was 360 with all the differentials and overtime,
less the 5% for cashing it and you're looking at 342.
Then the taxes come out.
128, same as ever, and you're looking at 214,
which is what's in the envelope.
Don't get your panties in a twist, Bobby.
This is my paycheck here.
Same as the other tower.
Line goes slow 'cause they all count it four times to make sure.
Next week will be faster. Week after that,
they'll just take the envelopes and walk.
You'll see.
Get the make-work money for Rudy?
See ya.
Rubino, you're up next.
- I am tired of this bullshit. - Hey.
Hey.
Marcy? Hello?
To the penny.
Like you said.
Let's go for a ride, Vince.
I wanna show you something.
Stay back!
Brought me out here to look at a hotel?
No, the bar.
Yeah, I heard of this place.
It's a fag joint, right?
Not much of one but, yeah. Penny Lane.
Like The Beatles song.
Come on, Vince, they don't bite.
It's a good song.
I wanted you to see this place, get your opinion,
like, on account of you know the business.
- You own this place? - No.
But the people that do are in trouble.
They're gonna get foreclosed on.
Owner's, like, five, six months behind on the rent.
Me? I'm trying to put my machines in here...
the jukebox, cigarette machines like that.
But why bother if there's no payout, right?
Got a friend named Tony. He cooks in the kitchen.
I gotta talk to him.
- Hey. - Hey.
- What can I get you? - Co-Cola.
- Mind if I ask you something? - Sure.
What's with this place?
Deader than Bobby Kennedy in here.
Well...
these places are popular, and then they're not, you know?
Well, queer bars in the Village
have been going strong for years, no offense.
Yeah, those places are safe, though.
What do you mean?
We got targeted.
Um...
somebody started making calls to customers,
picking on anybody with a wedding ring on...
you know, businessmen, the suit-and-tie crowd.
- Blackmail. - Yeah.
Once that happens, word gets around.
Then it's over.
So, what are you still doing here?
I'm still being paid.
What's that?
Just taking count.
You over-order liquor, you're in trouble,
so you gotta turn the inventory.
Otherwise it's dead money.
What's your name?
Paul.
Vincent.
Hi, Vincent.
- You guys find Tony? - Yeah, he's back there.
Drunk.
Vince, you coming?
See you, Paul.
So, what do you think?
You can't raise the dead.
Yeah, but maybe you can bring it back as something else.
Me? No. I already manage a joint.
And you really turned that Chink dog palace around,
which is why I'm offering you this.
It would be yours. You own it.
Why would you do that for me?
Well, I'd have a small piece of it.
Say 1,000 a week flat,
and I get half the take from the machines I put in there,
but the business would be yours.
Yeah, there's still a debt.
I mean, nobody's gonna forgive that.
A couple of Jews hold the notes
and another guy over at the Brill Building, too,
but I'll work that out.
You got a problem with who I am, Vincent?
Look, you own a business, any business,
you gotta pay the rent, right?
Think of me as just a regular landlord, that's all.
They look like they're really fucking.
Of course they are, baby.
But you notice how they cut out before he split it?
That's 'cause you can't be showing no penetration in a movie theater,
because the cops would raid the shit out of this motherfucker quick.
You want to see that
or his jizz when he busts his nut,
gotta go to one of them brown paper bag stores.
Yeah, you could do that.
Shit.
I could act in a real movie with a story and everything.
Yeah, I know, baby. You a star.
Check it out, Lori.
It's like an oil patch and those sorry bitches
are the derricks doing $5 and $10 slobber jobs around the clock
just to try to get some fresh-off-the-dog,
brogan-wearing popcorn pimp's nut.
Now, I want you to commit this shit to memory.
You know why?
'Cause you ain't never gonna see it or them again,
not as long as we're good together.
I have too much respect for how hard my girls work for me
to send them this a-ways.
However...
on the other hand, should things go wrong,
like you jumping ship 'cause some Slick Willie motherfucker
got inside your head?
Shit, this could be like the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Every bitch up here one way or the other
has made that kind of mistake.
I get it, C.C.
Vinnie, Vinnie, Vinnie, Vinnie.
Man, I thought you hated all those fucking made guys.
Yeah, Rudy's different.
He's a businessman. Came at me straight.
So if I'm gonna pay rent, might as well be to him.
I still don't get it.
I mean, you drink for free, you make good money.
You got all the gash you can handle
without any of the headache of owning the place.
- So why fucking do it? - Why the fuck not?
Look, Frankie...
as fucked up as you are
in every possible fucked-up way a man can be,
you always been the one... Major League prospect,
- prettiest women, flashiest cars. - What can I say?
Even Ma thought the sun rose out of your ass.
- What? - When we was kids at dinner?
After Pop, she always served you first.
Yeah, as it should be. I'm older.
- Yeah, by 23 minutes. - I'm still older.
I'm just saying.
I'm good at this.
I wanna see if I can be the best.
You know, start something from the ground up.
Maybe it's my time to shine.
Yeah? Why don't you shine this, baby brother?
All right, bring it over.
- Oh, pow! - Oh!
Hi. Is Eric here?
Were there to also demand
release from prison of Angela Davis,
and they heard her mother declare, quote, "Angela"...
Eric.
"represents the struggle of all political prisoners."
He's down in the basement.
Okay. Thank you.
- Oh, here they are. - Hey.
Where's Loretta?
Uh, family emergency.
Excuse me.
You guys have a script? I don't know my lines.
This isn't "Dr. Zhivago," honey.
They ain't even recording sound.
This all of it, Mooney?
No, I got more in the stockroom.
You know, let me get them for you.
Well, you don't... you don't gotta toss the place.
- Please? - "Licking Stick"?
- Blow jobs, right? - I don't watch.
- "Oyster Roast." - I'm providing a service.
Chris, get over here.
This guy's stuffing 10 inches of hard cock
into somebody's daughter in close-up.
Somebody must've put the wrong version of that one in the projector.
I guess somebody put the wrong one in this one, too.
Oh, you didn't trim the loops, Moon.
Very disappointed in you.
Why you guys busting my balls?
I mean, for Christ's sakes, "Sex USA" is playing
at the Rialto right now out in the open.
You know, go shut them down.
That's a documentary.
- This here... - What?
It ain't right.
Confiscate the rest of this stock, come on.
You heard him. Let's go, fat man.
Is this water sports? What the fuck is it?
That's a little bright.
Turn it around. The other side.
Yeah, yeah. Okay.
"Great Dane in the Morning."
And, action.
Action.
Go, go, yeah.
Mm-hmm.
- Oh... - Oh, nice.
And Vikings.
Oh, the Vikings are here!
Tracey, you're scared and turned on.
Be careful.
Hey, you, Acting 101, don't look at the camera, okay?
- I know. - Suspends the illusion.
- Sorry. - Okay, keep going.
We're burning film.
Okay.
Stop! Watch my hair.
Oh, I'm sorry.
No. Elbow.
Can I help you with something?
Can I check out a book?
Do you have a card?
You need to fill out a form.
Are you looking for anything specific?
Yeah.
All right.
Don't squint.
You're supposed to love Viking cum.
Viking cum's okay. Cold potato soup sucks.
If Speedy One and Two here hadn't blown their loads,
you'd be splooged with the real thing.
And don't talk, Tracey.
Sorry, forgot.
Here's your money.
Yeah. Thanks.
Sure.
Hey...
why is one side silver and one side white?
Aluminum gives you more light, white gives you a softer glow.
Huh.
And what's this one?
The key light? That's your main light source.
Yeah, and what's that?
The fill light. Hides your shadows.
Hey, Naomi!
So, how long is this movie gonna be?
- Nine hours? - Try eight minutes.
- What? We've been here all day. - We're just getting started.
We got a bunch of fresh meat coming in.
- Be here any minute. - Naomi!
Excuse me, Officer.
Excuse me, Officer. Officer.
- Step off. - No, right.
Right, but that's my wife you got there,
so there must be some kind of mistake.
Your wife's a fucking whore.
Yeah, that's a heartbreak to the whole family,
but I'll post her bail right here, right now.
How about I take you in, too?
No offense.
Just a misunderstanding.
Can I ask what precinct
so I can post in a rightful manner?
- 1-5. - The 1-5, right.
Yeah, and there's just one more thing.
Nigger...
Why would you do that?
'Cause the pigs do not set a sting like that
without a backup cage car waiting to cart your ass off,
and I ain't seen any.
And 'cause there ain't no 1-5 Precinct.
- Please. - 'Cause I ain't never seen a cop
wearing top-dollar Stacy Adams like his in my life.
They're too fucking cheap. Where's his badge?
Please. Please, C.C., get him off of me, please.
See? This some box top Deputy Dawg bullshit.
- Please... - Yeah, this?
This the real McCoy.
Yeah, yeah. I should've schooled you on that, and that's on me.
Let's see what we got here, huh?
Oh, right there.
Unh-unh. Remember what I said?
We ain't in Duluth no more, Dorothy.
C.C., please, get this man off of me.
Now, you been through some shit here this evening, no doubt.
But the best thing for you right now?
Just like falling off a bike, you gotta get right back on.
You happen to remember where he put the cuff keys?
Thanks a lot, sweetheart. For you.
Thank you, baby.
This seat taken?
Go ahead.
Let me buy you another drink.
Oh, no, thanks. I'm good.
You come in here to take a load off your feet?
Hey, I can dig it. I work long hours, too.
Look...
I better get going.
What's going on here?
We're talking.
I listen to people's stories and put them down on paper.
Sort of like an anthropologist.
You've heard of oral histories.
Larry, we was just having a conversation.
- I was just about to leave. - Okay, okay.
Well, conversations don't pay my bills.
- Come on. - Ow.
Practicing anthropology...
- Hey, hey, hey. - Let go.
What'd I tell you about fucking with them jaspers?
Huh?
They don't spend.
I want you to go out there and you work it.
Oh!
- Okay? - Yes, Larry.
I'm gonna be by later to see you.
I don't know what your game is,
but you stay away from my girls.
You heard me?
So, what are you doing tonight? Are you dating?
- Hey, you want a threesome? - Hey, Ruby.
Hi, baby.
On to fresher hell.
On last night's stabbing homicide...
found handcuffed in his car by the Lionel Hotel,
the vic, Rolfe Hermann,
might have been a master of moral degeneracy
in our humble precinct, but out in Great Neck,
he was a beloved biology teacher.
So, you hear anything out there...
It was Colonel Mustard in the pantry with a dildo.
Moving right along, strangulation homicide
last night in The Cameo. Perp still at large.
Three agg assaults. One in The Lark.
- Perp still at large. - Any descriptions?
Another one inside Grant's Bar.
Perp still at large.
Two rapes.
One complainant known pros, so who's to say?
Commercial robberies. Holy shit.
Fellas, watch the bodegas, all right?
Gunpoint commercials on the 100 block of East 3-0,
the 300 block of the West 3-5,
and the 200 block of the West 4-3.
That was a cheap prick, so who gives a flying fuck, right?
Burgs are gonna take a while, so...
grab a cup of coffee and put your feet up, okay?
Our late tour creeper...
Another day, another dollar.
The 200 block...
All right, ladies, show and prove.
Come on, Flanagan. I ain't working.
I'm just going for an Orange Julius.
Show and prove.
Get in the van, Ash.
The hoes go in, the hoes go out.
Now this motherfucker.
Like sweeping leaves on a windy day.
Ain't that right, Officers?
Solid bullshit.
Everybody goes tonight.
- Aw, come on. - What?
Let's go.
Asshole.
That's some bullshit, Alston.