1 00:00:05,147 --> 00:00:06,637 I'm getting really sick and tired 2 00:00:06,638 --> 00:00:09,176 of this "having to tell you what happened last week" shit. 3 00:00:09,177 --> 00:00:10,781 Take some notes or something. 4 00:00:11,301 --> 00:00:13,555 Get a pencil. Grab some paper. 5 00:00:14,355 --> 00:00:16,792 I'm serious. I can wait. 6 00:00:22,377 --> 00:00:25,680 Your father is gonna be the new Hobo Loco 7 00:00:25,681 --> 00:00:27,554 beverage spokesperson. 8 00:00:27,555 --> 00:00:30,317 Soon I'll be able to support those I love. 9 00:00:30,318 --> 00:00:31,523 Little Frank-ettes. 10 00:00:31,524 --> 00:00:33,899 Each day, you'll be given timed challenges. 11 00:00:33,900 --> 00:00:35,967 Those of you who fail to complete the tasks 12 00:00:35,968 --> 00:00:37,385 will be eliminated. 13 00:00:38,927 --> 00:00:40,833 All's fair in love and hobo wars, Frank. 14 00:00:40,834 --> 00:00:42,281 Whoa! 15 00:00:42,282 --> 00:00:43,801 All's fair, Mikey O. 16 00:00:43,802 --> 00:00:44,816 All's fair. 17 00:00:44,817 --> 00:00:48,134 You will bleed out and die if you carry six babies to term. 18 00:00:48,135 --> 00:00:49,759 She's trying to kill my babies! 19 00:00:49,760 --> 00:00:51,021 Ingrid? Ingrid? 20 00:00:51,022 --> 00:00:52,634 Oh, crap. 21 00:00:52,635 --> 00:00:53,978 I think I might be gay. 22 00:00:53,979 --> 00:00:56,110 I've just been feeling ways that I never felt before. 23 00:00:56,111 --> 00:00:57,471 Nice ass. 24 00:00:58,585 --> 00:01:00,342 Hey, so what's the job? Busboy? 25 00:01:00,343 --> 00:01:01,593 Uh, dishwasher? 26 00:01:01,594 --> 00:01:03,509 Street corner sign spinner. 27 00:01:03,510 --> 00:01:06,664 - You'll be back tomorrow, right? - Yeah. 28 00:01:06,665 --> 00:01:08,801 - Die! - Whoa, whoa, whoa. Stop! 29 00:01:08,802 --> 00:01:11,430 - We don't like him. - Santiago's a good guy. 30 00:01:12,471 --> 00:01:13,901 Oh, fuck. 31 00:01:14,805 --> 00:01:17,137 - Xan? - I didn't know where else to go. 32 00:01:17,138 --> 00:01:19,384 - Yo, wakey, wakey. - Get the fuck away from me! 33 00:01:19,385 --> 00:01:20,634 You smell like booze. 34 00:01:20,635 --> 00:01:22,676 - You're fired. - What? 35 00:01:22,677 --> 00:01:24,214 Some lady called the cops on me. 36 00:01:24,215 --> 00:01:25,425 - What'd you do? - Selling lemonade 37 00:01:25,426 --> 00:01:28,259 - in front of her house. - Motherfucker. 38 00:01:28,260 --> 00:01:30,195 That was my brother with the lemonade stand. 39 00:01:35,174 --> 00:01:41,175 Sync and corrections by btsix www.addic7ed.com 40 00:03:02,760 --> 00:03:05,926 Good morning, peaches and cream, number one girl. 41 00:03:05,927 --> 00:03:08,312 How's my six embryos today? 42 00:03:08,313 --> 00:03:09,340 You mean George, 43 00:03:09,341 --> 00:03:12,367 Gordy, Glenn, Gladys, Gina, and Gabby Gallagher? 44 00:03:12,368 --> 00:03:14,099 We're pissed, Frank. 45 00:03:14,100 --> 00:03:16,281 We're pregnant and we're lonely 46 00:03:16,282 --> 00:03:18,041 and we're tired of hiding from Dr. Kwan 47 00:03:18,042 --> 00:03:20,887 in this dark rat cave basement. 48 00:03:20,888 --> 00:03:22,440 The final's today. 49 00:03:22,441 --> 00:03:25,239 I want you home now. I want you home now. 50 00:03:25,240 --> 00:03:27,676 I want you the fuck home now. 51 00:03:27,677 --> 00:03:29,119 Right now. 52 00:03:29,120 --> 00:03:31,337 Well, yeah, sure, 53 00:03:32,112 --> 00:03:33,875 you... you want that, honey. 54 00:03:35,031 --> 00:03:39,300 This is for the future of our children. 55 00:03:39,301 --> 00:03:41,259 You can't ask me to quit now. 56 00:03:41,260 --> 00:03:43,119 You can't ask LeBron James 57 00:03:43,120 --> 00:03:44,899 not to play in the playoffs. 58 00:03:44,900 --> 00:03:48,259 I'll be home tonight, a winner, 59 00:03:48,260 --> 00:03:50,259 50... 60 00:03:50,260 --> 00:03:51,676 Motherfucker! 61 00:03:51,677 --> 00:03:53,092 Ingy? 62 00:03:55,135 --> 00:03:58,512 Things a tad stressful with the little lady, Frank? 63 00:03:59,343 --> 00:04:02,068 Might be time to wash up and head home. 64 00:04:02,069 --> 00:04:03,551 Nah. 65 00:04:03,552 --> 00:04:06,300 She was just calling to remind me 66 00:04:06,301 --> 00:04:09,175 to be humble when I win. 67 00:04:09,176 --> 00:04:11,384 I don't know. 68 00:04:11,385 --> 00:04:14,588 That sounded a lot like a woman wanting you to quit. 69 00:04:15,176 --> 00:04:16,673 Probably should. 70 00:04:17,413 --> 00:04:20,384 I've quit many things in my life, Mikey... 71 00:04:20,385 --> 00:04:22,843 School, jobs, marriages, 72 00:04:22,844 --> 00:04:25,050 rehab several times. 73 00:04:25,051 --> 00:04:27,137 I am not quitting this. 74 00:04:28,383 --> 00:04:31,718 I am the Hobo Loco Mofo. 75 00:04:31,719 --> 00:04:33,053 Okay... 76 00:05:36,908 --> 00:05:39,061 What are you doing? That's my Oxy! 77 00:05:39,062 --> 00:05:40,754 Hey, that bitch stole my Oxy! 78 00:05:40,755 --> 00:05:43,467 You fucking skank bitch! Get her! 79 00:05:56,232 --> 00:05:58,085 South Side piece of shit! 80 00:06:04,885 --> 00:06:06,426 Croissants? 81 00:06:06,427 --> 00:06:07,900 Where the hell'd we get croissants? 82 00:06:07,901 --> 00:06:10,009 That Randy guy keeps dropping off baked goods. 83 00:06:10,010 --> 00:06:11,059 Who? 84 00:06:11,060 --> 00:06:13,509 Mm, creepy guy. Ingrid's ex-husband. 85 00:06:13,510 --> 00:06:15,009 The more she refuses to come out of the basement, 86 00:06:15,010 --> 00:06:16,551 the more baked goods he drops off 87 00:06:16,552 --> 00:06:18,259 on our front porch. I mean, look at this. 88 00:06:18,260 --> 00:06:21,050 Cinnamon rolls, doughnut, doughnut holes... 89 00:06:21,051 --> 00:06:22,617 Kelly, have you tried the cinnamon bread yet? 90 00:06:22,618 --> 00:06:23,967 I know. Better than sex. 91 00:06:23,968 --> 00:06:26,185 Mm. 92 00:06:26,186 --> 00:06:27,676 What's everybody up to today? 93 00:06:27,677 --> 00:06:30,342 Carl's looking for buried treasure! 94 00:06:30,343 --> 00:06:32,300 Oh, laugh it up, guys, laugh it up, 95 00:06:32,301 --> 00:06:34,352 but come payday, you'll see who the real captain is. 96 00:06:34,353 --> 00:06:36,426 I gotta replace that janky furnace today. 97 00:06:36,427 --> 00:06:38,321 You know how much the guy who quoted me went for? 98 00:06:38,322 --> 00:06:40,322 - 7,500 bucks. - Jesus. 99 00:06:40,323 --> 00:06:42,402 Yeah, I'm gonna find a used one on Craigslist. 100 00:06:42,403 --> 00:06:44,592 Craigslist is for murderers, isn't it? 101 00:06:44,593 --> 00:06:47,324 Nah. I've Craigslist-ed, like, 40 times. 102 00:06:47,325 --> 00:06:48,884 Only gotten rape-y vibes once. 103 00:06:48,885 --> 00:06:51,032 You should try the scrapyard out past West Lake. 104 00:06:51,033 --> 00:06:52,481 My dad used to go there for parts 105 00:06:52,482 --> 00:06:55,509 when he was rebuilding his World War II reenactment Sherman tanks, 106 00:06:55,510 --> 00:06:56,822 and we saw furnaces there all the time. 107 00:06:56,823 --> 00:06:57,828 - Really? - Mm-hmm. 108 00:06:57,829 --> 00:06:59,592 - Where in West Lake? - I'll show you. 109 00:06:59,593 --> 00:07:00,967 I don't have anything else going on today. 110 00:07:00,968 --> 00:07:03,127 - Cool. - Um, no, you have softball camp, 111 00:07:03,128 --> 00:07:05,606 so you can't hang out with Debbie today, 'cause softball camp. 112 00:07:05,607 --> 00:07:06,646 "Softball camp." 113 00:07:06,647 --> 00:07:08,278 You can skip camp, can't you, Kell? 114 00:07:08,279 --> 00:07:10,092 Totally. Girls' day. 115 00:07:10,093 --> 00:07:11,634 We'll bring Franny. 116 00:07:11,635 --> 00:07:12,967 It's a date. 117 00:07:14,593 --> 00:07:16,342 Hey. 118 00:07:16,343 --> 00:07:19,134 May I interest you in a croissant? 119 00:07:19,135 --> 00:07:20,467 We're a regular Starbucks. 120 00:07:20,468 --> 00:07:22,067 No, thanks, I'm good. 121 00:07:24,968 --> 00:07:27,426 Hey, um, are you still good to give me and Xan 122 00:07:27,427 --> 00:07:29,384 - a ride downtown at 10:00? - Why are doughnuts... 123 00:07:29,385 --> 00:07:30,592 - Yeah, uh, totally. - Yeah? 124 00:07:30,593 --> 00:07:32,467 Great. I'll see you then. 125 00:07:32,468 --> 00:07:33,551 Okay. 126 00:07:35,510 --> 00:07:36,592 Kev, come on! 127 00:07:36,593 --> 00:07:38,718 We're gonna be late! 128 00:07:38,719 --> 00:07:40,592 Uh... 129 00:07:40,593 --> 00:07:42,009 You go ahead! 130 00:07:42,010 --> 00:07:43,718 I'll meet you there. 131 00:07:43,719 --> 00:07:46,269 With what car? What are you talking about? 132 00:07:46,270 --> 00:07:47,592 Come on! 133 00:07:48,331 --> 00:07:50,050 Hey! What are you doing? 134 00:07:50,051 --> 00:07:51,113 We're gonna be late! 135 00:07:51,114 --> 00:07:52,384 I Googled it. 136 00:07:52,385 --> 00:07:53,451 Googled what? 137 00:07:53,452 --> 00:07:54,926 Vasectomies. 138 00:07:54,927 --> 00:07:56,544 I saw a video on YouTube, and no, 139 00:07:56,545 --> 00:07:58,102 I'm not doing that shit. No. 140 00:07:58,103 --> 00:07:59,926 It's a two-millimeter incision 141 00:07:59,927 --> 00:08:01,426 that heals in two days. 142 00:08:01,427 --> 00:08:02,676 The common cold lasts longer. 143 00:08:02,677 --> 00:08:04,259 It's an incision with a knife 144 00:08:04,260 --> 00:08:05,592 into my ball bag. 145 00:08:05,593 --> 00:08:07,254 It's what 89% of people do 146 00:08:07,255 --> 00:08:09,104 when they don't want to have kids anymore. 147 00:08:09,105 --> 00:08:11,343 You agreed to this. You said you wanted to do it. 148 00:08:11,344 --> 00:08:14,849 I was emotionally distraught from losing Santiago! 149 00:08:14,850 --> 00:08:16,217 Kevin Ball, 150 00:08:16,218 --> 00:08:18,217 get your ass out here right now, 151 00:08:18,218 --> 00:08:20,303 before I Lorena Bobbit you myself. 152 00:08:29,010 --> 00:08:30,801 Excellent. In the car. 153 00:08:30,802 --> 00:08:32,718 Ball family, out! 154 00:08:34,010 --> 00:08:35,165 Ball out. 155 00:08:36,093 --> 00:08:39,139 All right, hobos. The final day 156 00:08:39,140 --> 00:08:42,055 of the Hobo Loco Man challenge is upon us. 157 00:08:42,056 --> 00:08:43,801 Today, one of you will be crowned 158 00:08:43,802 --> 00:08:45,404 the Hobo Loco Man. 159 00:08:47,010 --> 00:08:49,009 Three rounds today: 160 00:08:49,010 --> 00:08:51,321 quarterfinals, semifinals, and finals. 161 00:08:51,322 --> 00:08:54,324 The first challenge is begging! 162 00:08:54,325 --> 00:08:56,467 You'll have two hours 163 00:08:56,468 --> 00:08:58,745 to make as much money as you can begging. 164 00:09:01,176 --> 00:09:03,376 Who do you think our competition is today? 165 00:09:04,571 --> 00:09:07,967 Hmm, sorority girl, I think, is the dark horse. 166 00:09:07,968 --> 00:09:11,426 I had a cousin once. She was part of the Delta Nu. 167 00:09:11,427 --> 00:09:12,932 She's dead. 168 00:09:12,933 --> 00:09:14,396 Gloria? 169 00:09:18,343 --> 00:09:19,503 Jesus. 170 00:09:19,504 --> 00:09:20,917 But this guy. 171 00:09:20,918 --> 00:09:22,467 He may be a strong finisher. 172 00:09:22,468 --> 00:09:24,582 I saw him take a shit in the alley 173 00:09:24,583 --> 00:09:26,426 with no TP. 174 00:09:26,427 --> 00:09:28,264 Wiped himself with a taco. 175 00:09:28,265 --> 00:09:29,958 Hard or soft? 176 00:09:30,635 --> 00:09:31,837 The taco? 177 00:09:32,510 --> 00:09:34,699 - Hard. - Wow. 178 00:09:38,301 --> 00:09:41,050 - Thank you. - Mm-hmm. 179 00:09:43,677 --> 00:09:46,521 - .27. Coming in hot. - Wow. 180 00:09:46,522 --> 00:09:48,313 Your blood is basically jet fuel. 181 00:09:48,314 --> 00:09:50,260 I've been training my whole life for this day. 182 00:09:51,278 --> 00:09:53,240 .27 as well. 183 00:09:53,947 --> 00:09:55,884 Ain't we even stephens? 184 00:09:55,885 --> 00:09:57,801 All right, can I get two hours on the clock? 185 00:10:02,176 --> 00:10:03,634 And... 186 00:10:03,635 --> 00:10:05,551 Go! 187 00:10:05,552 --> 00:10:08,635 Come on, let's go, go, go! 188 00:10:11,242 --> 00:10:13,543 Tami's not here. Should we bounce? 189 00:10:14,202 --> 00:10:15,657 Let's give her another minute. 190 00:10:16,301 --> 00:10:17,865 See? There. 191 00:10:17,866 --> 00:10:19,736 That grate opens up to it. 192 00:10:20,337 --> 00:10:21,967 If one of us goes under 193 00:10:21,968 --> 00:10:23,426 and pushes up and one of us stays here and pulls up... 194 00:10:23,427 --> 00:10:24,926 We'll be able to get it out! 195 00:10:24,927 --> 00:10:27,175 Are you a top or a bottom? 196 00:10:28,259 --> 00:10:29,896 - I mean... - I'll go down. 197 00:10:29,897 --> 00:10:31,348 - You stay here. - Right. 198 00:10:31,349 --> 00:10:32,843 What you said. 199 00:10:32,844 --> 00:10:34,467 You're looking a little flushed there, Debs. 200 00:10:34,468 --> 00:10:35,530 - You okay? - Shut up. 201 00:10:35,531 --> 00:10:36,934 What are you guys still doing here? 202 00:10:36,935 --> 00:10:38,259 Shouldn't you be downtown? 203 00:10:38,260 --> 00:10:39,634 Yeah, you're right. 204 00:10:39,635 --> 00:10:40,967 I should text her, see what's up. 205 00:10:40,968 --> 00:10:42,759 Okay. Ready up there? 206 00:10:42,760 --> 00:10:44,583 Yeah. You got room to push? 207 00:10:44,584 --> 00:10:46,566 I think so. 208 00:10:48,593 --> 00:10:50,187 Jesus. 209 00:10:51,835 --> 00:10:54,047 All right, Xan, come on. We gotta take the El. 210 00:10:54,048 --> 00:10:55,384 What happened to Tami? 211 00:10:55,385 --> 00:10:56,801 She has to bail. 212 00:10:56,802 --> 00:10:58,156 That all she said? 213 00:10:58,157 --> 00:10:59,300 She gotta bail? 214 00:10:59,301 --> 00:11:00,551 No text, no emoji, 215 00:11:00,552 --> 00:11:02,634 - no sorry? - Yeah. So? 216 00:11:02,635 --> 00:11:04,537 So she flew out of here this morning 217 00:11:04,538 --> 00:11:07,870 and now you're getting non-emoji cancellation texts? 218 00:11:07,871 --> 00:11:10,092 - You're getting the D, son. - Oh, come on. 219 00:11:10,093 --> 00:11:11,427 People are allowed to bail, all right? 220 00:11:11,428 --> 00:11:12,759 Stuff comes up. Texts are short. 221 00:11:12,760 --> 00:11:14,673 Uh-huh. Whatever helps you sleep at night, pal. 222 00:11:14,674 --> 00:11:16,718 She's right. It's not looking good for you. 223 00:11:16,719 --> 00:11:18,509 All right. Come on, Xan. 224 00:11:18,510 --> 00:11:20,054 Push! 225 00:11:26,552 --> 00:11:28,051 Oh, yeah? Well, I quit! 226 00:11:35,635 --> 00:11:37,546 You ever worked on the line, Carl? 227 00:11:37,547 --> 00:11:39,175 In the kitchen? 228 00:11:39,176 --> 00:11:41,967 Okay, let me ask you this. 229 00:11:41,968 --> 00:11:43,619 Can you work Labor Day? 230 00:11:44,479 --> 00:11:45,624 I guess. 231 00:11:45,625 --> 00:11:46,843 Grab an apron. 232 00:11:49,315 --> 00:11:51,342 The twins tortured the Guatemalan refugees, 233 00:11:51,343 --> 00:11:53,009 not me. 234 00:11:53,010 --> 00:11:55,009 That's why this whole thing is bullshit. 235 00:11:55,010 --> 00:11:56,551 Now my wife's like, 236 00:11:56,552 --> 00:11:58,100 "We can't bring babies into the world, 237 00:11:58,101 --> 00:11:59,668 because if we do, our daughters will kill them." 238 00:11:59,669 --> 00:12:01,676 Well, why is that my scrotum's fault, 239 00:12:01,677 --> 00:12:03,384 and why can't she just take the pill, 240 00:12:03,385 --> 00:12:04,900 like other women? 241 00:12:04,901 --> 00:12:06,551 Why is it so much worse for her 242 00:12:06,552 --> 00:12:07,967 to take a tiny little pill 243 00:12:07,968 --> 00:12:09,467 that makes her "crazy" than it is for me 244 00:12:09,468 --> 00:12:11,092 to get my testicle lobbed off? 245 00:12:11,093 --> 00:12:13,426 Your testicle will not be "lobbed off," sir. 246 00:12:13,427 --> 00:12:15,217 Only your vas deferens tubes are blocked. 247 00:12:15,218 --> 00:12:16,634 Oh, it's bullshit. 248 00:12:16,635 --> 00:12:18,043 I'm calling bullshit on vasectomies. 249 00:12:18,044 --> 00:12:20,342 Time's up, vasectomies. 250 00:12:20,343 --> 00:12:22,050 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. What is that? 251 00:12:22,051 --> 00:12:23,175 Needle. 252 00:12:23,176 --> 00:12:24,759 Local anesthesia. 253 00:12:24,760 --> 00:12:26,843 Oh, good. I'ma need a lot of that. 254 00:12:26,844 --> 00:12:28,759 Uh, lots extra, please. 255 00:12:28,760 --> 00:12:30,759 I don't want to feel anything from my waist down. 256 00:12:30,760 --> 00:12:32,050 Agh! 257 00:12:32,051 --> 00:12:34,885 Yeah. 258 00:12:35,760 --> 00:12:37,733 All right. So what's my prognosis? 259 00:12:37,734 --> 00:12:38,819 The prognosis? 260 00:12:38,820 --> 00:12:40,946 How long am I gonna be in extraordinary pain? 261 00:12:40,947 --> 00:12:42,738 Oh, uh, day or two at the most. 262 00:12:42,739 --> 00:12:45,384 We've already called in a Vicodin prescription to your pharmacy, 263 00:12:45,385 --> 00:12:47,718 so take that as needed. All right. 264 00:12:49,552 --> 00:12:51,342 You feel anything down here? 265 00:12:51,343 --> 00:12:52,593 Any feeling at all? 266 00:12:53,433 --> 00:12:54,460 No. 267 00:12:55,456 --> 00:12:56,675 Okay. 268 00:12:56,676 --> 00:12:58,426 Now just try to relax, Mr. Ball. 269 00:12:58,427 --> 00:12:59,843 Is that a crack? 270 00:12:59,844 --> 00:13:01,676 No. Just your name, sir. 271 00:13:01,677 --> 00:13:03,172 Uh, won't you make yourself comfortable, 272 00:13:03,173 --> 00:13:05,509 enjoy this Muzak, and I'll be back shortly? 273 00:13:11,054 --> 00:13:12,050 Okay. 274 00:13:12,051 --> 00:13:13,217 Now push! 275 00:13:13,218 --> 00:13:14,468 Are you pushing? 276 00:13:14,469 --> 00:13:16,050 Yes, I'm pushing! 277 00:13:17,249 --> 00:13:18,801 Psst! 278 00:13:18,802 --> 00:13:20,259 Is the coast clear? 279 00:13:20,260 --> 00:13:21,995 Yep. Coast is clear. 280 00:13:21,996 --> 00:13:23,551 Excellent. 281 00:13:23,552 --> 00:13:25,690 I need some advice, Debbie. 282 00:13:25,691 --> 00:13:27,509 Not for me. For a friend. 283 00:13:27,510 --> 00:13:29,342 - You got a sec? - Sure, shoot. 284 00:13:29,343 --> 00:13:31,384 Okay. 285 00:13:31,385 --> 00:13:33,392 It's crowning! 286 00:13:33,393 --> 00:13:35,865 - You're crowning. - Awesome. 287 00:13:35,866 --> 00:13:37,801 - I'll come up and pull. - Okay. 288 00:13:37,802 --> 00:13:40,509 So here is my friend's situation. 289 00:13:40,510 --> 00:13:42,342 She's pregnant, and she's worried 290 00:13:42,343 --> 00:13:44,144 that her man won't be there for her 291 00:13:44,145 --> 00:13:45,884 when her six babies come, 292 00:13:45,885 --> 00:13:48,300 so she's asked me what to do. 293 00:13:48,301 --> 00:13:50,134 How will she know 294 00:13:50,135 --> 00:13:51,914 that he's really gonna be there? 295 00:13:52,844 --> 00:13:55,595 Frank is not going to be there for you. 296 00:13:55,596 --> 00:13:57,946 Definitely not, Ms. Jones. 297 00:13:57,947 --> 00:14:00,087 You should run away with that ex-husband guy. 298 00:14:00,088 --> 00:14:01,384 He loves you. 299 00:14:01,385 --> 00:14:03,300 People change. 300 00:14:03,301 --> 00:14:06,342 That is the entire basis of my therapeutic practice... 301 00:14:06,343 --> 00:14:07,926 That people change. 302 00:14:07,927 --> 00:14:10,175 Frank can change, right? 303 00:14:10,176 --> 00:14:13,312 No. Times a million, no. 304 00:14:13,313 --> 00:14:15,313 But he seems so committed. 305 00:14:15,927 --> 00:14:17,280 You could test him. 306 00:14:17,993 --> 00:14:19,009 For what? 307 00:14:19,010 --> 00:14:20,843 To see how he really feels about you. 308 00:14:20,844 --> 00:14:22,300 - Oh. - That's a good idea. 309 00:14:22,301 --> 00:14:23,590 Might as well. 310 00:14:23,591 --> 00:14:24,926 Could tell him you have terminal cancer 311 00:14:24,927 --> 00:14:26,175 or are gonna die in three days, 312 00:14:26,176 --> 00:14:27,624 see what he says about that. 313 00:14:28,427 --> 00:14:30,009 Interesting. 314 00:14:30,010 --> 00:14:31,547 And this works? 315 00:14:31,548 --> 00:14:32,926 What works? 316 00:14:32,927 --> 00:14:34,759 Testing a man for his loyalty. 317 00:14:34,760 --> 00:14:36,890 How do you test a man for loyalty, Fiona? 318 00:14:36,891 --> 00:14:38,091 You don't need to test. 319 00:14:38,092 --> 00:14:39,870 If it's got a dick, it ain't loyal. 320 00:14:39,871 --> 00:14:42,382 And what's with the hole in the floor? 321 00:14:42,383 --> 00:14:44,290 A little early for a drink, isn't it? 322 00:14:45,791 --> 00:14:47,967 All right, Mom. I'm gonna turn in. 323 00:14:47,968 --> 00:14:50,202 I'll have money for you later today. 324 00:14:50,983 --> 00:14:52,846 Any chance you could get it to me now? 325 00:14:52,847 --> 00:14:54,509 I gotta buy a used furnace, 326 00:14:54,510 --> 00:14:56,175 and bailing you out of jail last week 327 00:14:56,176 --> 00:14:57,355 kind of cleaned me out. 328 00:14:59,260 --> 00:15:02,926 Fine. 329 00:15:02,927 --> 00:15:05,259 See you in 20. 330 00:15:12,551 --> 00:15:14,009 All right! 331 00:15:14,010 --> 00:15:16,050 Emiliano, KJ, Stump. 332 00:15:16,051 --> 00:15:18,467 This is Carl. He's our new fry guy. 333 00:15:18,468 --> 00:15:21,317 This is grill, bun warmer, and beverage. 334 00:15:21,318 --> 00:15:24,732 Iraq vet, ex-con, laid off by GE. 335 00:15:24,733 --> 00:15:27,239 - Don't call us that, Lori. - Yeah, what the fuck, Lori? 336 00:15:27,240 --> 00:15:28,676 Be nice to this one, boys. 337 00:15:28,677 --> 00:15:30,676 He's never worked on a line before. 338 00:15:30,677 --> 00:15:32,886 Hey, all you got to do is follow that chart. 339 00:15:32,887 --> 00:15:37,887 When it says fry, you fry. 340 00:15:37,888 --> 00:15:40,217 All right, kid, here's the deal. 341 00:15:40,218 --> 00:15:42,300 We close at 11:00 p.m. 342 00:15:42,301 --> 00:15:44,300 At 11:01 p.m., 343 00:15:44,301 --> 00:15:46,727 we all smoke a blunt at the picnic table out back. 344 00:15:46,728 --> 00:15:50,128 As fry guy, you get to join us. 345 00:15:50,129 --> 00:15:52,051 Congratulations. 346 00:15:57,040 --> 00:16:00,001 You going the old signage route, Frank? 347 00:16:00,802 --> 00:16:03,051 A bit trite, don't you think? 348 00:16:22,701 --> 00:16:23,767 It's true. 349 00:16:24,521 --> 00:16:26,802 I got kicked out of the military 350 00:16:26,803 --> 00:16:29,215 'cause I couldn't get enough of his cock. 351 00:16:29,984 --> 00:16:32,317 I lost a leg to the Taliban. 352 00:16:33,844 --> 00:16:36,843 Did they give a shit? No. 353 00:16:36,844 --> 00:16:39,535 Sent my rainbow ass packing. 354 00:16:39,536 --> 00:16:41,300 Our dream 355 00:16:41,301 --> 00:16:42,926 was to return home 356 00:16:42,927 --> 00:16:44,654 with two purple hearts. 357 00:16:44,655 --> 00:16:46,297 Instead, 358 00:16:47,159 --> 00:16:48,766 we're in a parking lot 359 00:16:49,343 --> 00:16:51,359 with nothing to show for it 360 00:16:51,360 --> 00:16:53,955 except our love. 361 00:17:02,510 --> 00:17:03,509 Thank you. 362 00:17:03,510 --> 00:17:04,342 Oh, thank you. 363 00:17:04,343 --> 00:17:05,592 Oo-rah. 364 00:17:26,760 --> 00:17:27,760 Hey, Jack. 365 00:17:30,051 --> 00:17:32,175 Thank you. 366 00:17:47,718 --> 00:17:49,092 Phillip Gallagher? 367 00:17:49,093 --> 00:17:51,949 Yeah. Oh, yeah, you sit tight, okay? 368 00:17:51,950 --> 00:17:54,426 You, uh, read about the ten best hotels of 2015. 369 00:17:54,427 --> 00:17:56,093 Good? All right. 370 00:17:58,134 --> 00:17:59,133 Hi. 371 00:17:59,134 --> 00:18:00,677 Hi. 372 00:18:01,218 --> 00:18:02,384 How can I help you? 373 00:18:02,385 --> 00:18:03,634 Uh, I want to apply 374 00:18:03,635 --> 00:18:05,509 to foster a ten-year-old girl. 375 00:18:05,510 --> 00:18:07,824 Uh, foster to adopt, as her legal guardian. 376 00:18:07,825 --> 00:18:09,926 - She a blood relative? - No, but... 377 00:18:09,927 --> 00:18:11,175 So you're an unlicensed non-relative. 378 00:18:11,176 --> 00:18:13,175 Where's her mom? She in the system? 379 00:18:13,176 --> 00:18:15,259 No one knows where her mom is. 380 00:18:15,260 --> 00:18:17,551 No dad in the picture? Grandparents? 381 00:18:19,301 --> 00:18:21,592 Well, I'll tell you right now, Mr. Gallagher, 382 00:18:21,593 --> 00:18:22,791 this process isn't set up 383 00:18:22,792 --> 00:18:25,259 to give a 20-something male non-relative 384 00:18:25,260 --> 00:18:27,718 guardianship of a prepubescent girl. 385 00:18:27,719 --> 00:18:30,154 - Sure. - Lot of steps involved. 386 00:18:30,155 --> 00:18:31,843 Lot of paperwork. 387 00:18:31,844 --> 00:18:33,635 I, uh... I brought a pen, so... 388 00:18:36,217 --> 00:18:37,801 The girl you came with... is she the child 389 00:18:37,802 --> 00:18:38,863 you want to foster? 390 00:18:38,864 --> 00:18:40,551 Yeah. 391 00:18:40,552 --> 00:18:42,551 Is she already in your care, 392 00:18:42,552 --> 00:18:44,362 staying at your residence? 393 00:18:46,426 --> 00:18:50,009 She, uh... She feels safe with me. 394 00:18:50,010 --> 00:18:52,849 A'ight, her mom just up and left her. 395 00:18:52,850 --> 00:18:55,050 A'ight? She has no place else to go. 396 00:18:55,051 --> 00:18:56,975 That's not how this process works. 397 00:18:56,976 --> 00:18:59,263 You can't just start fostering someone. 398 00:19:07,879 --> 00:19:09,389 Okay. 399 00:19:13,927 --> 00:19:15,509 All right. 400 00:19:15,510 --> 00:19:17,320 Um, before we get started in here, 401 00:19:17,321 --> 00:19:20,897 gonna need you to sign this liability release. 402 00:19:20,898 --> 00:19:22,711 If you could just sign right down there for me. 403 00:19:24,006 --> 00:19:26,759 What are the chances I develop an internal hematoma? 404 00:19:26,760 --> 00:19:28,146 Extremely rare. 405 00:19:28,147 --> 00:19:29,759 What if I piss blood tomorrow? 406 00:19:29,760 --> 00:19:31,019 Very rare. 407 00:19:31,020 --> 00:19:32,504 Okay, time to sign. 408 00:19:38,368 --> 00:19:40,759 Doctor will be with you momentarily. 409 00:20:00,343 --> 00:20:03,551 Jesus. 410 00:20:03,552 --> 00:20:05,259 So we're all good there. 411 00:20:05,260 --> 00:20:07,092 Add "check smoke detectors" 412 00:20:07,093 --> 00:20:08,718 and a working furnace. Debs! 413 00:20:08,719 --> 00:20:09,760 - On it! - Great. 414 00:20:11,218 --> 00:20:13,676 Also, it says something about where I sleep. 415 00:20:13,677 --> 00:20:15,843 Let me see. 416 00:20:15,844 --> 00:20:17,342 "Own bed 417 00:20:17,343 --> 00:20:19,267 in a room with no more than one other person, 418 00:20:19,268 --> 00:20:22,426 of the same sex." 419 00:20:22,427 --> 00:20:26,032 Okay, uh, so maybe I could get a bunk bed for you and Debbie? 420 00:20:26,033 --> 00:20:28,715 - That sounds fun, right? - What? No way. 421 00:20:28,716 --> 00:20:31,300 No offense. I have Franny. 422 00:20:31,301 --> 00:20:33,551 All right, so I'll put the bunk beds in Fiona's room, 423 00:20:33,552 --> 00:20:34,676 you two can go in there, and Xan can have your old room. 424 00:20:34,677 --> 00:20:36,134 No. I'm a grown woman. 425 00:20:36,135 --> 00:20:37,384 I'm not sharing a room with Fiona. 426 00:20:37,385 --> 00:20:38,760 Look, she needs to sleep somewhere, Debs! 427 00:20:41,445 --> 00:20:43,384 A'ight, I'm sorry. I just... 428 00:20:43,385 --> 00:20:45,426 I'm trying to figure this out, all right? 429 00:20:45,427 --> 00:20:47,092 I'm gonna go buy a bunk bed, 430 00:20:47,093 --> 00:20:49,194 and we'll just go from there, yeah? 431 00:20:53,218 --> 00:20:56,048 Hey. Mm, here. 432 00:20:56,049 --> 00:20:58,718 Utilities plus half of what I owe you. 433 00:20:58,719 --> 00:21:00,526 Thanks again. 434 00:21:01,844 --> 00:21:03,384 And for my next trick, 435 00:21:03,385 --> 00:21:04,912 don't wake me. 436 00:21:06,301 --> 00:21:08,385 Is she just going to bed now? 437 00:21:16,968 --> 00:21:18,801 Done. Let's roll. 438 00:21:18,802 --> 00:21:20,259 Already? That was fast. 439 00:21:20,260 --> 00:21:21,759 Yeah, all done. Easy-peasy. 440 00:21:21,760 --> 00:21:23,342 What... shouldn't we sign you out? 441 00:21:23,343 --> 00:21:25,217 No, did it. All paid, like Fandango. 442 00:21:25,218 --> 00:21:27,759 I'm so proud of you, baby. 443 00:21:27,760 --> 00:21:29,843 And then there were five, 444 00:21:29,844 --> 00:21:31,175 ladies and gentlemen. 445 00:21:31,176 --> 00:21:33,014 Yes! 446 00:21:33,015 --> 00:21:36,592 Five contestants remain. 447 00:21:36,593 --> 00:21:38,384 All right, for the semifinals, 448 00:21:38,385 --> 00:21:40,556 we have a challenge that is gonna separate 449 00:21:40,557 --> 00:21:42,967 the truly loco from the mildly loco. 450 00:21:42,968 --> 00:21:44,467 We call it... 451 00:21:44,468 --> 00:21:47,108 The South Side Emergency Room Challenge! 452 00:21:47,109 --> 00:21:48,884 Whoo! 453 00:21:48,885 --> 00:21:51,217 County General is two blocks away 454 00:21:51,218 --> 00:21:53,009 on Ellis 455 00:21:53,010 --> 00:21:55,050 and boasts the longest 456 00:21:55,051 --> 00:21:56,884 emergency room waiting time 457 00:21:56,885 --> 00:21:59,326 in all Chicago: 458 00:21:59,327 --> 00:22:02,134 11 hours. 459 00:22:02,135 --> 00:22:03,884 Your challenge, 460 00:22:03,885 --> 00:22:05,509 in one hour or less, 461 00:22:05,510 --> 00:22:07,092 is to get seen 462 00:22:07,093 --> 00:22:08,843 by an ER doctor. 463 00:22:08,844 --> 00:22:11,092 You ever gotten through in less than an hour? 464 00:22:11,093 --> 00:22:13,092 No, not possible. 465 00:22:13,093 --> 00:22:14,724 It's gonna take gushing blood. 466 00:22:14,725 --> 00:22:16,175 Amputation. 467 00:22:16,176 --> 00:22:18,710 Grand mal seizure. Aw. 468 00:22:19,341 --> 00:22:21,257 Can I get one hour on the clock, please? 469 00:22:22,010 --> 00:22:23,092 Oh... All right. 470 00:22:23,093 --> 00:22:24,634 And... 471 00:22:24,635 --> 00:22:26,300 Go! 472 00:22:33,851 --> 00:22:36,050 Yo, Brad, hey. Hey, man, 473 00:22:36,051 --> 00:22:37,884 could I borrow a socket set? 474 00:22:37,885 --> 00:22:39,801 I got a bunk bed getting delivered. 475 00:22:39,802 --> 00:22:41,134 Take whatever you need. Yeah. 476 00:22:41,135 --> 00:22:42,507 Thanks, man. 477 00:22:42,508 --> 00:22:43,887 I miss a party, or... 478 00:22:43,888 --> 00:22:45,384 Uh, not a party. 479 00:22:45,385 --> 00:22:46,884 Uh, just some refined sugar 480 00:22:46,885 --> 00:22:48,547 in honor of Jay Z over there. 481 00:22:48,548 --> 00:22:50,092 Jay Z? 482 00:22:50,093 --> 00:22:51,592 I'm 100 days tomorrow! 483 00:22:51,593 --> 00:22:53,009 No shit! Yo! 484 00:22:53,010 --> 00:22:54,300 Hey, man, I'm so sorry. 485 00:22:54,301 --> 00:22:55,884 Fuck, I must have forgot. Yo. 486 00:22:55,885 --> 00:22:57,467 That's no joke, all right? 487 00:22:57,468 --> 00:22:59,384 What can I say? I got a good sponsor. 488 00:22:59,385 --> 00:23:00,992 You know what? We'll hit the 8:00 a.m. 489 00:23:00,993 --> 00:23:02,509 tomorrow morning and get some pie and celebrate, okay? 490 00:23:02,510 --> 00:23:04,216 - Sounds good. - All right, good. 491 00:23:05,385 --> 00:23:07,037 Hey, go ahead. Have a cupcake. 492 00:23:08,135 --> 00:23:10,467 Hey, man. Um... 493 00:23:10,468 --> 00:23:12,967 Cami say anything to you about Tami? 494 00:23:12,968 --> 00:23:14,157 What about Tami? 495 00:23:14,158 --> 00:23:15,592 I don't know. She's acting funny. 496 00:23:15,593 --> 00:23:16,856 She was supposed to pick us up 497 00:23:16,857 --> 00:23:18,050 this morning... never showed. 498 00:23:18,051 --> 00:23:19,574 I didn't hear anything. 499 00:23:20,633 --> 00:23:22,967 Maybe she's not cool with the whole Xan thing. 500 00:23:22,968 --> 00:23:24,676 I mean, it's one thing to start dating a guy, 501 00:23:24,677 --> 00:23:26,134 but it's another thing to start dating 502 00:23:26,135 --> 00:23:27,895 a dad with a preteen. 503 00:23:27,896 --> 00:23:30,134 What's she been saying about it? 504 00:23:30,135 --> 00:23:32,009 Oh, nothing. I mean... 505 00:23:32,010 --> 00:23:33,943 I don't know. I guess I didn't really ask. 506 00:23:34,510 --> 00:23:36,342 Women like to be asked everything. 507 00:23:36,343 --> 00:23:37,926 I don't buy 1% milk instead of 2% 508 00:23:37,927 --> 00:23:39,426 without asking Cami. 509 00:23:39,427 --> 00:23:40,884 What, you think she's gonna make me choose 510 00:23:40,885 --> 00:23:42,967 between her and Xan? That... that's crazy. 511 00:23:42,968 --> 00:23:44,926 I don't know, but you gotta ask. 512 00:23:44,927 --> 00:23:46,718 Just ask, pretend-listen, and nod. 513 00:23:46,719 --> 00:23:48,077 Works every time. 514 00:23:52,488 --> 00:23:54,759 Okay girls, here we go. 515 00:23:54,760 --> 00:23:58,134 Here we go, honey. Okay. 516 00:23:59,635 --> 00:24:01,634 Oh... 517 00:24:01,635 --> 00:24:02,884 Oh, you okay, honey? 518 00:24:02,885 --> 00:24:04,526 Oh... 519 00:24:06,301 --> 00:24:09,679 Oh, the pain. 520 00:24:10,593 --> 00:24:13,616 The pain is still so much. It's mucho. 521 00:24:13,617 --> 00:24:16,300 - Muy mucho pain. - Oh. 522 00:24:16,301 --> 00:24:17,884 The painkillers haven't kicked in yet? 523 00:24:17,885 --> 00:24:19,050 Yeah, I... 524 00:24:19,051 --> 00:24:20,967 ...am answer questions. 525 00:24:20,968 --> 00:24:22,718 Wow. Okay. 526 00:24:22,719 --> 00:24:24,142 I'll get you some ice. 527 00:24:24,143 --> 00:24:26,634 You gotta ice it today every 20 minutes. 528 00:24:26,635 --> 00:24:28,551 20 minutes on, 20 minutes off. 529 00:24:28,552 --> 00:24:29,718 You hear me? 530 00:24:29,719 --> 00:24:31,384 Ah. 531 00:24:31,385 --> 00:24:32,676 You guys want me to make you 532 00:24:32,677 --> 00:24:34,384 a snack before I go to work today? 533 00:24:34,385 --> 00:24:35,967 Yes! 534 00:24:35,968 --> 00:24:37,210 Kev? 535 00:24:38,218 --> 00:24:41,805 Kevin. Hey, hey, hey. 536 00:24:41,806 --> 00:24:43,926 Are you gonna be okay watching the girls today? 537 00:24:43,927 --> 00:24:47,009 Mm, yes, nachos. 538 00:24:47,010 --> 00:24:48,810 Extra guac 539 00:24:48,811 --> 00:24:50,438 and sour cream. 540 00:24:50,439 --> 00:24:52,671 Shit. 541 00:24:54,343 --> 00:24:56,134 Hey, Deb. 542 00:24:56,135 --> 00:24:58,175 Kev had a minor medical procedure this morning. 543 00:24:58,176 --> 00:24:59,720 He's not up to watching the girls. 544 00:24:59,721 --> 00:25:00,926 Can you watch them for a few hours 545 00:25:00,927 --> 00:25:02,217 while I run to the Alibi? 546 00:25:02,218 --> 00:25:03,801 Yeah, sure. No problem. 547 00:25:03,802 --> 00:25:05,259 Just throw them in the Pack 'n Play with Franny. 548 00:25:05,260 --> 00:25:06,843 I have her watching cartoons till we're done here. 549 00:25:06,844 --> 00:25:07,926 Thanks, girl. 550 00:25:07,927 --> 00:25:09,134 Cute furnace. 551 00:25:09,135 --> 00:25:11,009 Only cost me 700 bucks. 552 00:25:18,593 --> 00:25:20,926 I got a fork in my leg! 553 00:25:20,927 --> 00:25:22,967 I need to see a doctor! 554 00:25:22,968 --> 00:25:25,718 I'm suicidal. I'm going to do it. 555 00:25:27,677 --> 00:25:29,509 - I'm really... - You ready? 556 00:25:29,510 --> 00:25:31,259 I'm really gonna do it. 557 00:25:31,260 --> 00:25:32,467 - There you go. - I'm serious. 558 00:25:32,468 --> 00:25:34,718 I'm... I'm so suicidal. 559 00:25:34,719 --> 00:25:38,426 I'm going to do it. 560 00:25:38,427 --> 00:25:40,551 Oh, wow. 561 00:25:40,552 --> 00:25:42,134 Ready? 562 00:25:45,176 --> 00:25:46,718 Okay. 563 00:25:52,968 --> 00:25:55,718 You go. 564 00:25:55,719 --> 00:25:57,926 Excuse me. 565 00:25:57,927 --> 00:26:00,134 Excuse me. 566 00:26:02,301 --> 00:26:04,592 My friend and I have this cough. 567 00:26:04,593 --> 00:26:06,759 - It just won't... - Code red. TB alert. 568 00:26:06,760 --> 00:26:08,259 I think he's got a... 569 00:26:08,260 --> 00:26:09,551 Yes, sir. One second. 570 00:26:09,552 --> 00:26:11,592 TB protocol! Get them to quarantine! 571 00:26:11,593 --> 00:26:13,217 You're being admitted. There are some wheelchairs 572 00:26:13,218 --> 00:26:14,884 here for you right now. 573 00:26:14,885 --> 00:26:16,801 Sir, if you could just have a seat. 574 00:26:16,802 --> 00:26:18,759 Get them to isolation right away! 575 00:26:18,760 --> 00:26:20,718 We'll take you back to see the doctor. 576 00:26:20,719 --> 00:26:23,467 Let's get them to quarantine. 577 00:26:31,218 --> 00:26:33,217 Could someone get that, for fuck's sake? 578 00:26:37,260 --> 00:26:41,468 Oh, God. Keep your fucking pants on. 579 00:26:46,343 --> 00:26:47,602 - What? - Hi. 580 00:26:47,603 --> 00:26:49,935 I'm Peter Naylor, here to see Phillip Gallagher. 581 00:26:49,936 --> 00:26:51,718 - He at home? - Lip! 582 00:26:51,719 --> 00:26:53,927 You home? 583 00:26:56,653 --> 00:26:57,759 Guess not. 584 00:26:57,760 --> 00:27:00,026 What about Alexandra Galvez? 585 00:27:00,635 --> 00:27:02,798 - She in? - Who? 586 00:27:02,799 --> 00:27:05,508 Alexandra Galvez. G-A-L-V-E-Z. 587 00:27:05,509 --> 00:27:07,368 Female, age ten, African-American. 588 00:27:07,968 --> 00:27:10,718 Oh, Xan? That her name? 589 00:27:10,719 --> 00:27:14,054 Uh, I'm sorry. I was sound asleep. 590 00:27:14,055 --> 00:27:16,384 Yeah, Xan crashes here sometimes. 591 00:27:16,385 --> 00:27:18,811 - Why? - I'm with DCFS, 592 00:27:18,812 --> 00:27:20,342 here to do a home safety check 593 00:27:20,343 --> 00:27:22,468 for a case opened up by Phillip Gallagher. 594 00:27:24,176 --> 00:27:25,343 Oh. 595 00:27:26,218 --> 00:27:27,516 May I come in? 596 00:27:29,582 --> 00:27:30,749 Sure. 597 00:27:38,468 --> 00:27:41,009 We're just doing a few, uh, home improvement projects 598 00:27:41,010 --> 00:27:42,509 - today. - Hmm. 599 00:27:42,510 --> 00:27:44,371 Your tetanus is up to date, right? 600 00:27:46,624 --> 00:27:48,833 Is that an open hole in the floor? 601 00:27:50,468 --> 00:27:53,801 Uh, yes, but it's not what it appears to be. 602 00:27:53,802 --> 00:27:56,967 My sister is actually a welder, so she's very qualified to... 603 00:27:56,968 --> 00:27:59,700 Uh, Debs, can you come down here, please? 604 00:28:03,009 --> 00:28:05,384 Who's in charge of these children? 605 00:28:05,385 --> 00:28:07,801 Um, Debbie. Debbie is. 606 00:28:07,802 --> 00:28:10,009 Uh, the woman you can't find? 607 00:28:10,010 --> 00:28:11,676 Uh, well, she's definitely here. 608 00:28:11,677 --> 00:28:13,801 She's just probably getting a tool or something. 609 00:28:13,802 --> 00:28:16,384 Debs! Can you come down here, please? 610 00:28:16,385 --> 00:28:18,026 Are you here? 611 00:28:19,218 --> 00:28:21,342 Uh, it doesn't seem like Debs is here. 612 00:28:21,343 --> 00:28:22,509 Hmm. 613 00:28:22,510 --> 00:28:25,014 Well, also, I was... I was here. 614 00:28:25,015 --> 00:28:27,767 I was right upstairs, so if the kids needed anything, 615 00:28:27,768 --> 00:28:29,580 I... I would've heard them and come running. 616 00:28:29,581 --> 00:28:31,484 Weren't you sound asleep? 617 00:28:32,678 --> 00:28:35,335 Uh... Yes. 618 00:28:35,336 --> 00:28:37,004 Mm. 619 00:28:37,005 --> 00:28:38,671 And where does Alexandra sleep? 620 00:28:39,566 --> 00:28:42,378 Uh, on the couch, most of the time, I think. 621 00:28:45,143 --> 00:28:47,343 We take really good care of her. 622 00:28:51,843 --> 00:28:52,926 Upstairs? 623 00:28:52,927 --> 00:28:53,967 Why not? 624 00:28:53,968 --> 00:28:55,385 Of course. 625 00:28:59,802 --> 00:29:01,884 Oh, we did it! 626 00:29:01,885 --> 00:29:03,175 Got it done. 627 00:29:03,176 --> 00:29:05,050 New furnace, boy! 628 00:29:07,011 --> 00:29:08,342 Oh, I'm parched. 629 00:29:08,343 --> 00:29:09,676 Can I drink out of that? 630 00:29:09,677 --> 00:29:10,843 Yeah, sure. 631 00:29:10,844 --> 00:29:12,218 Let me turn it on. 632 00:29:22,552 --> 00:29:24,175 Oh, see, there's Debs. 633 00:29:24,176 --> 00:29:25,843 I knew she was here. 634 00:29:25,844 --> 00:29:27,217 Debs! 635 00:29:27,218 --> 00:29:28,342 There she is. 636 00:29:28,343 --> 00:29:30,050 Hey, Debbie? 637 00:29:30,051 --> 00:29:31,634 W-would you come in here, please? 638 00:29:31,635 --> 00:29:33,217 Why? 639 00:29:33,218 --> 00:29:35,551 It's fine. We're all set here. 640 00:29:35,552 --> 00:29:37,259 Um... 641 00:29:40,468 --> 00:29:41,926 No, you bitch! 642 00:29:41,927 --> 00:29:43,551 If you can just wait a moment... 643 00:29:43,552 --> 00:29:45,092 She... she was just outside, 644 00:29:45,093 --> 00:29:48,092 and, see, this is her daughter here, Francis. 645 00:29:48,093 --> 00:29:49,843 Oh, Phillip, good. 646 00:29:49,844 --> 00:29:51,050 This is, um... 647 00:29:51,051 --> 00:29:52,512 Peter. 648 00:29:52,513 --> 00:29:54,509 Uh, he's here for the house check. 649 00:29:54,510 --> 00:29:56,634 Oh, hey, hey. 650 00:29:56,635 --> 00:29:57,843 Peter, how's it going, man? 651 00:29:57,844 --> 00:29:59,342 I'm Phillip. It's... it's very nice 652 00:29:59,343 --> 00:30:01,384 to meet you, sir. Um... 653 00:30:01,385 --> 00:30:03,342 I wasn't expecting you here so soon. 654 00:30:03,343 --> 00:30:04,467 Unannounced. 655 00:30:04,468 --> 00:30:06,426 Right, um... 656 00:30:06,427 --> 00:30:09,551 Well, I'm here now, so, uh, how about I take over 657 00:30:09,552 --> 00:30:10,967 and I'll... I'll give you the tour, then? 658 00:30:10,968 --> 00:30:12,967 Miss Gallagher already showed me around. 659 00:30:12,968 --> 00:30:14,676 She did. Okay. 660 00:30:14,677 --> 00:30:16,801 Um, hey, hey, I'm sure you're, uh, 661 00:30:16,802 --> 00:30:18,134 a really busy guy, but, you know, 662 00:30:18,135 --> 00:30:19,671 maybe just give me a couple minutes. 663 00:30:19,672 --> 00:30:20,926 I can show you around. 664 00:30:20,927 --> 00:30:22,043 You know, explain a couple things. 665 00:30:22,044 --> 00:30:23,651 I got two more appointments today. 666 00:30:24,091 --> 00:30:26,175 Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. 667 00:30:26,176 --> 00:30:28,300 Look, just come back in a couple hours, all right? 668 00:30:28,301 --> 00:30:30,370 Please, I-I just got her a comforter. 669 00:30:30,371 --> 00:30:32,259 All right? I-I got her a bunk bed coming. 670 00:30:32,260 --> 00:30:34,175 Sorry. 671 00:30:34,176 --> 00:30:35,875 I'm done here. 672 00:31:00,927 --> 00:31:02,134 Ahoy, mateys. 673 00:31:02,135 --> 00:31:03,967 Break's over. Come on. 674 00:31:03,968 --> 00:31:05,592 Hey, yo, can I ask you guys something real quick? 675 00:31:05,593 --> 00:31:06,926 - Sure. - Yeah. 676 00:31:06,927 --> 00:31:08,575 What do you think this picture's of? 677 00:31:10,301 --> 00:31:12,884 It's easy. It's hot, is what it is. 678 00:31:12,885 --> 00:31:15,426 Two fucking hot lesbians being fucking hot. 679 00:31:15,427 --> 00:31:18,467 - Yeah, lesbian porn. - My dick's hard. 680 00:31:18,468 --> 00:31:20,467 Yo, that's my sister and my girlfriend. 681 00:31:20,468 --> 00:31:22,050 - No way. - Fuck you. 682 00:31:22,051 --> 00:31:23,432 Which one's your sister? 683 00:31:24,593 --> 00:31:27,057 Uh, she's macking on your girl, huh? 684 00:31:31,635 --> 00:31:33,050 Hey, hey. 685 00:31:33,051 --> 00:31:35,175 Why the hell'd you let DCFS in here? 686 00:31:35,176 --> 00:31:36,426 I'm sorry. 687 00:31:36,427 --> 00:31:38,375 I had no idea who that guy was. I-I didn't... 688 00:31:38,376 --> 00:31:40,134 Who the fuck did you think that was? 689 00:31:40,135 --> 00:31:41,938 He's wearing a tie and he's got a fucking clipboard. 690 00:31:41,939 --> 00:31:44,577 I was asleep! I'm not a fucking mind reader. 691 00:31:44,578 --> 00:31:46,249 Why didn't you tell me they were coming? 692 00:31:46,250 --> 00:31:47,884 - Why didn't I tell you? - Yes. 693 00:31:47,885 --> 00:31:49,509 Maybe if I'd known DCFS was dropping by... 694 00:31:49,510 --> 00:31:51,050 Jesus Christ. Do you have any idea 695 00:31:51,051 --> 00:31:52,426 how much you fucked this up for me? 696 00:31:52,427 --> 00:31:53,902 This is not my fault. 697 00:31:53,903 --> 00:31:56,696 - I did not invite DCFS here. - Hey, hey, shh. 698 00:31:56,697 --> 00:31:58,509 I did not leave a... a furnace in the house... 699 00:31:58,510 --> 00:32:00,509 - Hey, hey, hey! - ...Or kids in a Pack 'n Play, 700 00:32:00,510 --> 00:32:02,717 or an open hole in the fucking floor. 701 00:32:02,718 --> 00:32:04,551 No, but you sure as shit didn't help, Fiona. 702 00:32:04,552 --> 00:32:06,092 The old Fiona would've handled this, 703 00:32:06,093 --> 00:32:07,685 would've spun shit, would've covered for me. 704 00:32:07,686 --> 00:32:09,300 What was I supposed to do, huh? 705 00:32:09,301 --> 00:32:10,467 Bake him a fucking cake? 706 00:32:10,468 --> 00:32:11,549 No, but I expected you 707 00:32:11,550 --> 00:32:13,101 to not be drunk in the middle of the day. 708 00:32:13,102 --> 00:32:14,394 How about that, huh? 709 00:32:26,677 --> 00:32:28,134 Maybe I'm tired 710 00:32:28,135 --> 00:32:30,593 of playing Susie fucking Sunshine 711 00:32:30,594 --> 00:32:32,885 all the time, huh? Think of that? 712 00:32:36,596 --> 00:32:38,217 'Cause if I want to be drunk 713 00:32:38,218 --> 00:32:39,843 in the middle of the fucking day, 714 00:32:39,844 --> 00:32:41,760 that is my fucking business. 715 00:33:15,009 --> 00:33:17,134 We are very lucky to have Camilla back with us today... 716 00:33:17,135 --> 00:33:19,259 Why can't we watch the game? This sucks. 717 00:33:19,260 --> 00:33:20,940 Where's Kevin? 718 00:33:20,941 --> 00:33:22,759 Kev had a vasectomy today. 719 00:33:22,760 --> 00:33:24,575 - Ooh. - Poor bastard. 720 00:33:24,576 --> 00:33:25,592 Worst day of my life. 721 00:33:25,593 --> 00:33:27,175 I know, but it was time, 722 00:33:27,176 --> 00:33:28,676 with Santiago, and, of course, 723 00:33:28,677 --> 00:33:30,756 me telling him it was time. 724 00:33:30,757 --> 00:33:32,676 They warn him about the pooling? 725 00:33:32,677 --> 00:33:34,710 - You had blood pooling, too? - Ah. 726 00:33:34,711 --> 00:33:37,050 They had to drain me like a pig down there. 727 00:33:37,051 --> 00:33:39,217 You have to be nice to the old boy, V. 728 00:33:39,218 --> 00:33:41,342 He's going through some serious torture 729 00:33:41,343 --> 00:33:44,218 down there. 730 00:33:44,968 --> 00:33:46,167 Alibi. 731 00:33:47,249 --> 00:33:48,260 The who? 732 00:33:49,868 --> 00:33:51,201 Reschedule what? 733 00:33:53,478 --> 00:33:55,092 What do you mean, he didn't have it? 734 00:33:55,093 --> 00:33:56,300 He's at home right now, recovering. 735 00:33:56,301 --> 00:33:58,551 He said his pain level's a te... 736 00:34:36,802 --> 00:34:38,963 Hey, it's Tami. Leave a message. 737 00:34:40,135 --> 00:34:43,134 Hey, Tami, um, 738 00:34:43,135 --> 00:34:44,752 it's me. Uh... 739 00:34:45,552 --> 00:34:47,092 Look, I'm... I'm sure you're... 740 00:34:47,093 --> 00:34:48,676 You're probably getting off work soon. 741 00:34:48,677 --> 00:34:51,178 Uh, I'm about to hit a meeting, 742 00:34:51,894 --> 00:34:56,311 um, you know, 'cause I, uh... 743 00:34:58,134 --> 00:34:59,540 I need a meeting. 744 00:34:59,541 --> 00:35:02,907 Uh... 745 00:35:02,908 --> 00:35:05,467 Actually, I had a... A pretty shitty day, 746 00:35:05,468 --> 00:35:06,922 to be honest. 747 00:35:09,176 --> 00:35:10,259 Oh... 748 00:35:11,260 --> 00:35:13,426 Yeah, just call me back, all right? 749 00:35:13,427 --> 00:35:14,718 Thanks. 750 00:35:19,719 --> 00:35:21,467 Hello, I'm home. 751 00:35:21,468 --> 00:35:22,634 Hey. 752 00:35:22,635 --> 00:35:25,134 Hey! 753 00:35:25,135 --> 00:35:28,300 - Hey, Carl, we're in here. - We're in the kitchen! 754 00:35:28,301 --> 00:35:30,134 We got muffins, y'all! 755 00:35:30,135 --> 00:35:32,967 Muffins! Muffins! Muffins! 756 00:35:32,968 --> 00:35:34,801 The best. 757 00:35:34,802 --> 00:35:37,342 Carl, your sister is so fucking funny. 758 00:35:37,343 --> 00:35:38,777 What's so funny? 759 00:35:38,778 --> 00:35:40,926 Oh, it's an inside joke. You wouldn't get it. 760 00:35:40,927 --> 00:35:43,050 It's a muffin commercial. 761 00:35:43,051 --> 00:35:45,759 You know the fat guy from the muffin commercial? 762 00:35:45,760 --> 00:35:47,884 "We got muffins, y'all!" 763 00:35:49,635 --> 00:35:50,884 Stop. 764 00:35:53,885 --> 00:35:55,759 Oh, I'm gonna run up and get dressed. 765 00:35:55,760 --> 00:35:57,134 D, can I borrow something to wear? 766 00:35:57,135 --> 00:35:58,700 Of course, girl. Take whatever. 767 00:35:58,701 --> 00:36:00,092 Do you want to split another with me, 768 00:36:00,093 --> 00:36:01,175 or you want your own when you're back? 769 00:36:01,176 --> 00:36:02,321 Split with you. 770 00:36:02,322 --> 00:36:03,676 Be right back, fry guy. 771 00:36:03,677 --> 00:36:05,343 I'm so proud of you. 772 00:36:08,274 --> 00:36:10,050 The fuck you think you're doing? 773 00:36:10,051 --> 00:36:11,759 Putting peanut butter on a Ritz. 774 00:36:11,760 --> 00:36:13,982 No, with Kelly. Why you trying to get with her? 775 00:36:13,983 --> 00:36:15,300 - What? - Stop fronting. 776 00:36:15,301 --> 00:36:17,456 I'm not fronting. 777 00:36:17,457 --> 00:36:19,076 Her and I just get along good. 778 00:36:19,077 --> 00:36:20,467 Aren't I supposed to get along well 779 00:36:20,468 --> 00:36:22,543 with my brother's girlfriend if she's awesome? 780 00:36:22,544 --> 00:36:25,209 No, she's my awesome, not your awesome. 781 00:36:25,210 --> 00:36:26,801 She's not a lesbian, dumb-ass. 782 00:36:26,802 --> 00:36:28,356 Exactly. She's not gay. 783 00:36:28,357 --> 00:36:30,217 Although she is the kind of girl 784 00:36:30,218 --> 00:36:31,828 who could come out later in life. 785 00:36:31,829 --> 00:36:33,555 I'm not getting total gay vibes, 786 00:36:33,556 --> 00:36:36,040 but it's inconclusive, so... I'd say yeah, 787 00:36:36,041 --> 00:36:38,301 she'll probably eventually end up gay. 788 00:36:39,134 --> 00:36:41,092 Just knock it off. I mean it. 789 00:36:41,093 --> 00:36:43,509 There's nothing going on between me and your girlfriend. 790 00:36:43,510 --> 00:36:45,050 Keep your blouse on, Carl. 791 00:36:45,051 --> 00:36:47,426 You guys know where, uh, Lip went? 792 00:36:47,427 --> 00:36:48,718 No. 793 00:36:48,719 --> 00:36:50,098 Well, he's not answering his phone. 794 00:36:50,099 --> 00:36:51,468 I gotta find him. 795 00:36:53,093 --> 00:36:55,759 Hey, Xan, do you know where Lip might be? 796 00:36:55,760 --> 00:36:57,300 Maybe the shop? 797 00:36:57,301 --> 00:36:59,385 All right, thanks. 798 00:37:01,772 --> 00:37:03,967 - Hey, Mikey. - Yeah, Frank? 799 00:37:03,968 --> 00:37:06,008 No matter what the final challenge is, buddy, 800 00:37:06,974 --> 00:37:08,217 I-I just want you to know 801 00:37:08,218 --> 00:37:10,259 you've been a pleasure to work with. 802 00:37:10,260 --> 00:37:11,672 You're a hobo 803 00:37:11,673 --> 00:37:12,792 from another mother. 804 00:37:12,793 --> 00:37:14,858 Thanks for that. Thank you, Frank. 805 00:37:15,634 --> 00:37:17,652 Couldn't have said that better myself. 806 00:37:19,653 --> 00:37:21,676 All right, let's get started! 807 00:37:24,208 --> 00:37:27,718 From hundreds of hopefuls to dozens of competitors, 808 00:37:27,719 --> 00:37:32,509 to eight finalists to six valiant losers... 809 00:37:34,093 --> 00:37:38,092 ...And finally, finally, to two final hobos. 810 00:37:38,093 --> 00:37:40,592 We've come to the last round, 811 00:37:40,593 --> 00:37:43,801 where Frank and Mikey will compete mano y mano, 812 00:37:43,802 --> 00:37:45,420 but the question is, 813 00:37:45,421 --> 00:37:49,417 who will wear the Hobo Loco crown? 814 00:37:50,968 --> 00:37:52,718 - Hold on. - That'll be me. 815 00:37:58,301 --> 00:37:59,986 Was that a train? 816 00:38:00,552 --> 00:38:02,801 Oh, man, I hate trains. 817 00:38:02,802 --> 00:38:04,329 That's right! 818 00:38:04,330 --> 00:38:07,884 When you think of the classic American hobo, 819 00:38:07,885 --> 00:38:09,592 what is he doing? 820 00:38:09,593 --> 00:38:12,009 Jumping on a moving train! 821 00:38:14,885 --> 00:38:16,717 The train 822 00:38:16,718 --> 00:38:20,217 will barrel down on Frank and Mikey 823 00:38:20,218 --> 00:38:22,967 and you two will run like hell 824 00:38:22,968 --> 00:38:24,319 to hop on. 825 00:38:24,320 --> 00:38:26,300 The hobo who is in the car 826 00:38:26,301 --> 00:38:28,092 when the train crosses the finish line 827 00:38:28,093 --> 00:38:30,308 is our winner, but first, 828 00:38:31,051 --> 00:38:32,676 four shots each! 829 00:38:32,677 --> 00:38:35,175 Loco up! 830 00:38:47,885 --> 00:38:50,676 You came! My baby. 831 00:38:50,677 --> 00:38:52,384 Oh, God. 832 00:38:52,385 --> 00:38:54,634 Frank, something's wrong. I'm in pain. 833 00:38:54,635 --> 00:38:55,801 What do you mean? 834 00:38:55,802 --> 00:38:57,092 I'm cramping and I'm spotting 835 00:38:57,093 --> 00:38:58,843 and there's a lot of blood. 836 00:38:58,844 --> 00:39:01,759 I think I'm having between one and six miscarriages. 837 00:39:01,760 --> 00:39:03,217 Right now? Oh, God. 838 00:39:03,218 --> 00:39:05,009 - Uh... - Yeah, look, I-I need you 839 00:39:05,010 --> 00:39:07,263 to come home. Care for me. 840 00:39:08,385 --> 00:39:09,551 Frank. 841 00:39:09,552 --> 00:39:10,754 Okay. 842 00:39:10,755 --> 00:39:12,467 Here's the plan. You pop a squat 843 00:39:12,468 --> 00:39:13,551 right here for just a few minutes. 844 00:39:13,552 --> 00:39:14,592 - I will... - Pop a squat? 845 00:39:14,593 --> 00:39:15,634 Or... or sit on those 846 00:39:15,635 --> 00:39:17,009 very comfortable benches, 847 00:39:17,010 --> 00:39:18,592 and I will be back momentarily. 848 00:39:18,593 --> 00:39:20,342 This'll take three, maybe five minutes. 849 00:39:20,343 --> 00:39:22,134 I am miscarrying. 850 00:39:22,135 --> 00:39:24,706 Will you come with me, or will you stay? 851 00:39:24,707 --> 00:39:26,843 Frank, four shots, 852 00:39:26,844 --> 00:39:28,394 or you're disqualified. 853 00:39:28,395 --> 00:39:30,468 Come with me, Frank. Come. 854 00:39:32,927 --> 00:39:34,144 I'm coming! 855 00:39:35,005 --> 00:39:37,092 I will be back. I love you. 856 00:39:37,093 --> 00:39:38,467 I'm gonna win this. 857 00:39:38,468 --> 00:39:39,621 I'll be back. 858 00:39:39,622 --> 00:39:41,494 There he goes. There he goes. 859 00:39:41,495 --> 00:39:43,314 Okay! Whoo! 860 00:39:43,315 --> 00:39:44,924 Oh, like nothing! 861 00:39:52,927 --> 00:39:54,342 Hello? 862 00:39:54,343 --> 00:39:56,927 Hey. We, uh... we shut down at 5:00. 863 00:39:56,928 --> 00:39:58,447 Closing up here. Can I help you? 864 00:39:58,448 --> 00:39:59,513 Hi. Um... 865 00:39:59,514 --> 00:40:00,977 I'm looking for my brother, Lip. 866 00:40:00,978 --> 00:40:02,676 - Is he here? - You're Lip's sister? 867 00:40:02,677 --> 00:40:04,509 - Yeah. - No way. I'm Jason. 868 00:40:04,510 --> 00:40:05,926 - Hi. - Your brother's a great guy. 869 00:40:05,927 --> 00:40:07,509 Yeah, he is. 870 00:40:07,510 --> 00:40:09,759 He's not here, though. Nobody here but me. 871 00:40:09,760 --> 00:40:11,384 You want me to text him and tell him... 872 00:40:11,385 --> 00:40:14,092 No, no. I think he's avoiding me 873 00:40:14,093 --> 00:40:16,759 'cause I fucked something up for him. 874 00:40:16,760 --> 00:40:18,445 I owe him an apology. 875 00:40:19,402 --> 00:40:21,712 Apparently, I owe everyone an apology. 876 00:40:22,260 --> 00:40:24,844 Well, you can talk to me about it. 877 00:40:24,845 --> 00:40:26,656 You know, if you want to. 878 00:40:30,427 --> 00:40:33,801 Shit is going down, Jason... 879 00:40:33,802 --> 00:40:35,509 God... 880 00:40:35,510 --> 00:40:38,385 In my life. 881 00:40:43,901 --> 00:40:44,928 I'm broke... 882 00:40:47,259 --> 00:40:49,447 ...back home, 883 00:40:50,468 --> 00:40:52,183 and my boyfriend's married. 884 00:40:53,149 --> 00:40:56,496 I got fired from the place that I managed. 885 00:40:57,927 --> 00:40:59,967 Probably heard all that before, right? 886 00:40:59,968 --> 00:41:01,759 Lip comes in whining about me. 887 00:41:01,760 --> 00:41:03,301 He doesn't, no. 888 00:41:05,259 --> 00:41:06,602 Liar. 889 00:41:09,710 --> 00:41:11,970 I went to jail, too. Yeah. 890 00:41:12,591 --> 00:41:15,081 Assault charges. Punched a racist. 891 00:41:16,093 --> 00:41:17,881 Court date coming up. 892 00:41:20,412 --> 00:41:22,652 And I sold drugs today. 893 00:41:24,760 --> 00:41:26,078 That was fun. 894 00:41:29,655 --> 00:41:32,360 And I'm just in a really fucked-up place. 895 00:41:35,135 --> 00:41:37,050 You ever been in a fucked-up place? 896 00:41:40,699 --> 00:41:41,842 Yeah. 897 00:41:41,843 --> 00:41:43,252 Hmm. 898 00:41:43,253 --> 00:41:44,773 See? 899 00:41:44,774 --> 00:41:47,884 You know what I'm talking about. 900 00:41:50,218 --> 00:41:52,599 So many motorcycles in here. 901 00:41:54,293 --> 00:41:57,375 No one get tired of looking at them? 902 00:42:00,677 --> 00:42:02,426 You mind? 903 00:42:04,301 --> 00:42:05,968 Oh, yeah, sure. Go. 904 00:42:05,969 --> 00:42:07,467 Fuck. Sorry. That's so rude. 905 00:42:07,468 --> 00:42:09,188 Yeah. 906 00:42:09,189 --> 00:42:11,426 Go get yourself a cup. 907 00:42:17,510 --> 00:42:20,432 I taught myself to ride a bike, by the way. 908 00:42:21,218 --> 00:42:22,919 The kind you pedal. 909 00:42:24,010 --> 00:42:26,300 I taught Lip, too. 910 00:42:26,301 --> 00:42:28,050 He doesn't remember that now. 911 00:42:28,051 --> 00:42:29,838 I taught him... 912 00:42:32,760 --> 00:42:35,259 And I taught Debbie and Carl 913 00:42:35,260 --> 00:42:38,134 and Ian and Liam. 914 00:42:53,698 --> 00:42:55,009 Hey. 915 00:42:55,010 --> 00:42:56,300 It's not bad. 916 00:42:56,301 --> 00:42:58,134 Lip. Hey. 917 00:42:58,135 --> 00:43:01,070 Hey. I-I've been texting and... and calling all day. 918 00:43:01,071 --> 00:43:04,123 Uh, now is not a great time. 919 00:43:05,283 --> 00:43:06,865 Look, is this about Xan? 920 00:43:06,866 --> 00:43:08,763 And what, you... You just don't show up, or... 921 00:43:08,764 --> 00:43:10,021 Okay, slow your roll, all right? 922 00:43:10,022 --> 00:43:11,366 Uh, you guys go ahead. 923 00:43:11,367 --> 00:43:12,794 - I'll catch up. - Okay. 924 00:43:13,719 --> 00:43:15,945 I've had a really shitty day, all right? 925 00:43:15,946 --> 00:43:17,551 DCFS showed up unannounced. 926 00:43:17,552 --> 00:43:19,259 Fiona answered the door fucking drunk. 927 00:43:19,260 --> 00:43:20,301 I mean... 928 00:43:23,629 --> 00:43:24,754 What is this? 929 00:43:26,386 --> 00:43:28,151 Why... why are you sending me to voice mail? 930 00:43:30,159 --> 00:43:31,535 This isn't about you. 931 00:43:31,536 --> 00:43:33,244 So what, you're just pissed, then, 932 00:43:33,245 --> 00:43:35,300 that I'm trying to foster Xan? 933 00:43:35,301 --> 00:43:37,121 I mean, is it so crazy that... that I'd want 934 00:43:37,122 --> 00:43:38,629 to make someone's life any better? 935 00:43:38,630 --> 00:43:40,385 Okay, I'm pregnant. 936 00:43:45,510 --> 00:43:47,292 I realized it this morning in the shower. 937 00:43:48,135 --> 00:43:49,346 I'm late. 938 00:43:50,339 --> 00:43:52,922 So I left your house, I got a test, 939 00:43:52,923 --> 00:43:55,549 and I saw the... 940 00:43:55,550 --> 00:43:58,801 ...biggest, bluest plus sign I've ever seen, 941 00:43:58,802 --> 00:44:02,259 and so I went back to CVS, got another test. 942 00:44:02,260 --> 00:44:04,217 Positive. 943 00:44:06,969 --> 00:44:08,488 You sure it's mine? 944 00:44:09,427 --> 00:44:11,729 Yeah, I'm sure it's yours. 945 00:44:12,594 --> 00:44:14,926 I make Boone wear a condom. He's been in the Philippines. 946 00:44:14,927 --> 00:44:16,279 I double-bag that shit. 947 00:44:17,510 --> 00:44:18,689 What are you gonna do? 948 00:44:19,329 --> 00:44:22,201 We. What are we gonna do? 949 00:44:23,218 --> 00:44:24,437 I don't know. 950 00:44:25,802 --> 00:44:27,009 Um... 951 00:44:33,135 --> 00:44:34,592 Shit. 952 00:44:34,593 --> 00:44:36,131 My Uber's here. I gotta go. 953 00:44:36,677 --> 00:44:38,009 Hey, hey. No, no, 954 00:44:38,010 --> 00:44:39,801 we... we have to talk about this, right? 955 00:44:45,440 --> 00:44:47,384 Well, can I... Can I call you later? 956 00:44:47,385 --> 00:44:49,311 Yeah, uh, if you want to call me, 957 00:44:49,312 --> 00:44:50,951 that's cool, but if you don't... 958 00:44:51,871 --> 00:44:53,217 I gotta go. 959 00:44:56,051 --> 00:44:57,759 Hey. 960 00:45:10,552 --> 00:45:12,964 Hey, man, I'm... I'm kind of in the middle of something. 961 00:45:12,965 --> 00:45:14,301 Can I call you back? 962 00:45:17,509 --> 00:45:18,756 W-w-what happened? 963 00:45:19,596 --> 00:45:22,426 That train is coming in fast, 964 00:45:22,427 --> 00:45:24,634 and we're supposed to run 965 00:45:24,635 --> 00:45:27,009 and jump on that thing? 966 00:45:27,010 --> 00:45:31,134 One man's... fast is another man's slow. 967 00:45:31,135 --> 00:45:32,735 Maybe we should go in on it 968 00:45:32,736 --> 00:45:34,426 together, though, like compadres. 969 00:45:34,427 --> 00:45:36,631 First one up helps the other. 970 00:45:36,632 --> 00:45:38,426 We split the money. 971 00:45:38,427 --> 00:45:39,926 You're just saying that 972 00:45:39,927 --> 00:45:42,467 because you're in worse shape than my liver. 973 00:45:42,468 --> 00:45:46,175 No, Frank, I genuinely like you! 974 00:45:46,176 --> 00:45:48,259 You're my best friend! 975 00:45:48,260 --> 00:45:51,093 There's no "we" in "win," O'Shea. 976 00:45:53,093 --> 00:45:55,009 It's time. 977 00:46:00,635 --> 00:46:03,551 Go! Go, go, go, go, go! 978 00:46:06,844 --> 00:46:09,342 Yo, Frank, wait for me! Man! 979 00:46:09,343 --> 00:46:11,342 That's it? That's all you've go... 980 00:46:14,677 --> 00:46:17,718 Yeah! Yeah! 981 00:46:17,719 --> 00:46:19,509 Yeah... no! 982 00:46:24,343 --> 00:46:25,843 Not without me, Frank, 983 00:46:25,844 --> 00:46:28,134 you motherfucker! 984 00:46:29,510 --> 00:46:31,634 Get off of me! Jesus. 985 00:46:31,635 --> 00:46:33,676 I wanna win! 986 00:46:33,677 --> 00:46:36,843 - Frank! - Jesus. 987 00:46:38,802 --> 00:46:41,884 Oh, no. That's the finish line, 988 00:46:41,885 --> 00:46:43,884 and neither hobo reached the train. 989 00:46:43,885 --> 00:46:46,134 Okay. 990 00:46:46,135 --> 00:46:49,759 Okay. Thank you, Frank. 991 00:46:49,760 --> 00:46:51,592 Thank you. 992 00:46:51,593 --> 00:46:54,009 Oh, what the fuck? 993 00:46:54,010 --> 00:46:55,676 Great job, kids. 994 00:46:55,677 --> 00:46:57,509 Oh, boy, that was some event. 995 00:46:57,510 --> 00:46:59,801 I'll just take this right off your hands. 996 00:46:59,802 --> 00:47:01,384 Actually there's... There's been a development, 997 00:47:01,385 --> 00:47:03,300 Frank, if you could just... Just hold. 998 00:47:03,301 --> 00:47:04,676 Hold? I'll just hold 999 00:47:04,677 --> 00:47:06,676 this big fat check I just won. 1000 00:47:06,677 --> 00:47:08,843 In the event that no one wins 1001 00:47:08,844 --> 00:47:10,134 the final event, the hobo with the largest 1002 00:47:10,135 --> 00:47:11,676 social media following wins. 1003 00:47:11,677 --> 00:47:13,426 - Gloria! - Gloria! 1004 00:47:13,427 --> 00:47:14,551 Congratulations! 1005 00:47:14,552 --> 00:47:16,134 Are you fucking kidding me? 1006 00:47:16,135 --> 00:47:17,926 She posed topless with fans. 1007 00:47:17,927 --> 00:47:19,926 You... you can't compete with... with titties. 1008 00:47:19,927 --> 00:47:23,759 Ladies and gentlemen, the Hobo Loco Man is... 1009 00:47:23,760 --> 00:47:25,009 Gloria! 1010 00:47:36,218 --> 00:47:37,592 Fuck. 1011 00:48:03,033 --> 00:48:04,759 Hey, what's all this? 1012 00:48:04,760 --> 00:48:06,426 Movie night. Say what? 1013 00:48:06,427 --> 00:48:08,426 Taking a popcorn break. 1014 00:48:08,427 --> 00:48:10,175 Hey. I was thinking, you know, 1015 00:48:10,176 --> 00:48:12,084 maybe you and I could go spend some time upstairs. 1016 00:48:12,802 --> 00:48:14,551 Already? It's... it's early. 1017 00:48:14,552 --> 00:48:15,801 I was thinking, you know, 1018 00:48:15,802 --> 00:48:17,342 maybe you and I could just hang out. 1019 00:48:17,343 --> 00:48:18,634 I'm fresh out of the shower. 1020 00:48:18,635 --> 00:48:19,801 Want some butter, Kell? 1021 00:48:19,802 --> 00:48:21,300 Does the pope wear a funny hat? 1022 00:48:21,301 --> 00:48:22,967 Uh-huh. 1023 00:48:22,968 --> 00:48:24,801 W-why don't you watch the movie with us? 1024 00:48:24,802 --> 00:48:26,545 We're watching Showgirls. 1025 00:48:26,546 --> 00:48:27,931 You're watching Showgirls? 1026 00:48:27,932 --> 00:48:29,050 Yeah. She's never seen it before. 1027 00:48:29,051 --> 00:48:30,592 The old brunette is being such a good mentor 1028 00:48:30,593 --> 00:48:31,592 to the young blonde one. 1029 00:48:31,593 --> 00:48:32,691 - I know. - Okay. 1030 00:48:32,692 --> 00:48:34,384 Kell, I'ma head upstairs right now. 1031 00:48:34,385 --> 00:48:35,900 I'd really like if you came with me. 1032 00:48:35,901 --> 00:48:38,454 No way. She needs to see how it ends. 1033 00:48:39,260 --> 00:48:41,009 I know how it ends. 1034 00:48:54,301 --> 00:48:55,301 Hey. 1035 00:48:55,843 --> 00:48:56,863 Hey. 1036 00:48:56,864 --> 00:48:57,967 Hey, man. Hey. 1037 00:48:57,968 --> 00:48:59,634 Hey. You all right? 1038 00:48:59,635 --> 00:49:00,946 You all right? 1039 00:49:00,947 --> 00:49:02,352 I'm so sorry, man. 1040 00:49:03,093 --> 00:49:04,967 I fucked up. 1041 00:49:04,968 --> 00:49:06,300 Don't be sorry. It's okay. 1042 00:49:06,301 --> 00:49:07,509 All right? We all slip. 1043 00:49:07,510 --> 00:49:09,134 Not like this, man. 1044 00:49:09,135 --> 00:49:11,551 100 days I just flushed down the drain. 1045 00:49:11,552 --> 00:49:14,509 Just like I did one time. Right? 1046 00:49:14,510 --> 00:49:16,592 Brad fucked up, too. We all have, a'ight? 1047 00:49:16,593 --> 00:49:18,050 It's not important. 1048 00:49:18,051 --> 00:49:19,259 Okay? What's important 1049 00:49:19,260 --> 00:49:21,038 is that you get back up again. 1050 00:49:21,039 --> 00:49:23,169 I don't even remember what happened. 1051 00:49:25,051 --> 00:49:26,635 It just took over me. 1052 00:49:30,426 --> 00:49:32,050 Your sister had vodka, 1053 00:49:32,051 --> 00:49:34,593 and all of a sudden, I'm drinking it. 1054 00:49:36,009 --> 00:49:38,468 Next thing I know, I'm calling my guy and shooting up. 1055 00:49:49,343 --> 00:49:50,673 You said my sister. 1056 00:49:53,135 --> 00:49:55,373 Fiona came by the shop looking for you. 1057 00:49:57,011 --> 00:49:59,078 Wasn't her fault, man. It was mine. 1058 00:49:59,885 --> 00:50:01,217 I asked her for it. 1059 00:50:07,176 --> 00:50:08,915 Fiona gave you vodka? 1060 00:50:09,826 --> 00:50:11,426 It's on me. 1061 00:50:11,427 --> 00:50:13,648 It's not on her, a'ight? 1062 00:50:13,649 --> 00:50:15,241 I'm a fucking piece of shit waste of space. 1063 00:50:15,242 --> 00:50:16,495 Hey, hey, hey. No. 1064 00:50:18,760 --> 00:50:21,509 You're a good guy, a'ight? You're good. 1065 00:50:21,510 --> 00:50:23,676 - You are good. - No. 1066 00:50:25,719 --> 00:50:28,259 I'm so sorry. 1067 00:50:29,468 --> 00:50:30,551 It's all right. 1068 00:50:30,552 --> 00:50:32,050 I'm so sorry. 1069 00:50:32,051 --> 00:50:33,766 It's all right. That's okay. That's okay. 1070 00:50:34,677 --> 00:50:36,592 It's all right. 1071 00:50:42,586 --> 00:50:44,720 All right, girls, go upstairs and play. 1072 00:50:44,721 --> 00:50:46,586 Daddy had a major surgery 1073 00:50:46,587 --> 00:50:48,280 and we need to give him some time to rest. 1074 00:50:48,281 --> 00:50:50,551 Yeah, I'm sorry, girls. I'm a little out of commission. 1075 00:50:50,552 --> 00:50:52,967 I just got to get my strength back, though. 1076 00:50:52,968 --> 00:50:54,093 I love you! 1077 00:50:54,843 --> 00:50:57,217 How you doing, babe? What's your pain level? 1078 00:50:57,218 --> 00:50:58,967 Oh... 1079 00:50:58,968 --> 00:51:01,634 - 12. - Oh, my goodness! 1080 00:51:01,635 --> 00:51:03,592 You're so brave. 1081 00:51:03,593 --> 00:51:05,217 Thank you. 1082 00:51:05,218 --> 00:51:06,843 Is that the stuff to make my hot wings? 1083 00:51:06,844 --> 00:51:08,676 Yes, that is the stuff 1084 00:51:08,677 --> 00:51:10,947 to make your homemade hot wings. 1085 00:51:10,948 --> 00:51:13,843 Gonna take me about two or three hours. 1086 00:51:13,844 --> 00:51:16,009 It's a long time of being on your feet 1087 00:51:16,010 --> 00:51:17,592 after a full day of work, but... 1088 00:51:17,593 --> 00:51:20,009 Mmm, that sounds amazing. Thank you. 1089 00:51:22,218 --> 00:51:24,093 I should probably look at it. 1090 00:51:25,468 --> 00:51:26,796 What? 1091 00:51:26,797 --> 00:51:28,217 The wound. 1092 00:51:28,218 --> 00:51:29,931 Make sure it's not getting infected. 1093 00:51:32,426 --> 00:51:34,134 You know, 1094 00:51:34,135 --> 00:51:36,509 it's no need to, because... 1095 00:51:36,510 --> 00:51:37,843 I already checked it earlier. 1096 00:51:37,844 --> 00:51:39,009 Um, it's... it's fine. 1097 00:51:39,010 --> 00:51:40,008 It's all good. 1098 00:51:40,009 --> 00:51:41,134 Checked the stitches. 1099 00:51:41,135 --> 00:51:42,143 I can tell. 1100 00:51:42,144 --> 00:51:43,884 You gotta be safe. 1101 00:51:43,885 --> 00:51:45,476 Don't be shy. 1102 00:51:47,010 --> 00:51:50,967 I know I've been having nachos all day, so... 1103 00:51:50,968 --> 00:51:53,217 ...I got a lot of gas going on down there. 1104 00:51:53,218 --> 00:51:55,068 You don't want anything. 1105 00:51:55,069 --> 00:51:57,741 Don't be nervous, Kev... 1106 00:51:57,742 --> 00:51:59,327 ...Unless there's something you're not telling me. 1107 00:51:59,328 --> 00:52:00,668 Agh! Okay, okay, okay, fine! 1108 00:52:00,669 --> 00:52:01,951 I didn't get a vasectomy. 1109 00:52:01,952 --> 00:52:04,245 I pretended to while taking Vicodin all day, 1110 00:52:04,246 --> 00:52:05,467 and I was masturbating, 1111 00:52:05,468 --> 00:52:08,177 and I learned to do one of the dances on Fortnite. 1112 00:52:08,178 --> 00:52:09,877 I'm the devil himself. 1113 00:52:09,878 --> 00:52:11,926 I'll reschedule the vasectomy right now. 1114 00:52:11,927 --> 00:52:13,987 - Ow. - You're damn right you will. 1115 00:52:13,988 --> 00:52:15,299 Fuck! 1116 00:52:16,802 --> 00:52:19,300 God. 1117 00:52:21,093 --> 00:52:23,259 You're still making the wings, though, right? 1118 00:52:28,150 --> 00:52:30,718 Oh, hey, wait a minute. 1119 00:52:30,719 --> 00:52:33,217 You're leaving? 1120 00:52:33,218 --> 00:52:35,384 Well, of course I'm leaving. 1121 00:52:35,385 --> 00:52:37,092 What did you think would happen? 1122 00:52:37,093 --> 00:52:40,300 It was a test, you idiot, and you failed. 1123 00:52:40,301 --> 00:52:41,634 A test? 1124 00:52:41,635 --> 00:52:42,783 Yeah. 1125 00:52:42,784 --> 00:52:44,616 I didn't miscarry. 1126 00:52:44,617 --> 00:52:47,462 I was testing you to see if you gave a shit, 1127 00:52:47,463 --> 00:52:48,718 and you don't. 1128 00:52:48,719 --> 00:52:51,551 So now you're going off with this clown 1129 00:52:51,552 --> 00:52:54,843 because I failed a non-test I didn't know I took? 1130 00:52:54,844 --> 00:52:56,551 Hello, Frank. Nice to see you. 1131 00:52:57,677 --> 00:53:00,521 Uh, what about the babies? 1132 00:53:01,301 --> 00:53:03,141 I'm gonna reduce to two. 1133 00:53:04,051 --> 00:53:06,202 Randy's gonna make bread full-time. 1134 00:53:06,927 --> 00:53:09,218 I love you and the six G's. 1135 00:53:09,219 --> 00:53:12,292 I know there's some truth to that, Frank, 1136 00:53:12,293 --> 00:53:14,884 but medication or not, 1137 00:53:14,885 --> 00:53:16,698 you're just not good for me. 1138 00:53:18,385 --> 00:53:20,254 Look, the point is 1139 00:53:20,255 --> 00:53:22,759 there's always gonna be someone you love 1140 00:53:22,760 --> 00:53:24,567 more than me and the kids. 1141 00:53:25,676 --> 00:53:27,467 She means alcohol, Frank, 1142 00:53:27,468 --> 00:53:28,994 because you're an alcoholic. 1143 00:53:28,995 --> 00:53:31,967 Thank you. I got... I got that. 1144 00:53:31,968 --> 00:53:34,467 I need you to sign this. 1145 00:53:34,468 --> 00:53:36,050 Says you'll never come forward 1146 00:53:36,051 --> 00:53:38,926 to claim any paternity rights. 1147 00:53:38,927 --> 00:53:40,967 Please. 1148 00:53:40,968 --> 00:53:43,759 Usually, there's some... 1149 00:53:43,760 --> 00:53:46,843 ...exchange of funds when rights are signed away. 1150 00:53:48,927 --> 00:53:50,941 How's 5K for your trouble? 1151 00:53:51,927 --> 00:53:54,300 I'd be a lot less trouble for 10K. 1152 00:53:54,301 --> 00:53:55,843 Good-bye, Frank. 1153 00:53:55,844 --> 00:53:57,509 Ingrid, sugar, 1154 00:53:57,510 --> 00:53:59,384 - su... sweetheart. - No, no, no. Good-bye. 1155 00:53:59,385 --> 00:54:03,342 W-w... honey, Ingy, listen to me. 1156 00:54:03,343 --> 00:54:06,384 That's two Ls in "Gallagher"? 1157 00:54:06,385 --> 00:54:08,926 Make it out to cash. 1158 00:54:12,260 --> 00:54:13,801 Now for breaking news, 1159 00:54:13,802 --> 00:54:16,718 we go live to the scene of a drive-by shooting... 1160 00:54:18,575 --> 00:54:20,551 Hey, campers. What are we watching? 1161 00:54:20,552 --> 00:54:22,676 We were watching Showgirls, but it's over. 1162 00:54:22,677 --> 00:54:24,509 Yep, show's over. Time for bed, Kell. 1163 00:54:24,510 --> 00:54:26,134 - Come on. - I missed Showgirls? 1164 00:54:26,135 --> 00:54:27,342 Gah. 1165 00:54:29,176 --> 00:54:31,050 When she slips on the marbles... 1166 00:54:31,051 --> 00:54:33,384 Oh, my God, that's good. 1167 00:54:33,385 --> 00:54:35,926 Ooh, candy corn. Where did we get that? 1168 00:54:35,927 --> 00:54:37,551 Dollar store. Off-season aisle. 1169 00:54:37,552 --> 00:54:40,384 Oh, I'ma eat the fuck out of this. 1170 00:54:40,385 --> 00:54:43,634 Hey, did Carl tell you about the time 1171 00:54:43,635 --> 00:54:46,718 that he shoved 16 of these fuckers up his nose? 1172 00:54:46,719 --> 00:54:48,023 Come on, we don't need 1173 00:54:48,024 --> 00:54:49,592 - to be talking about it. - So gross. 1174 00:54:49,593 --> 00:54:51,134 16? 1175 00:54:51,135 --> 00:54:53,426 He bio-engineered that shit right up there. 1176 00:54:55,301 --> 00:54:57,050 - What's up, bro? - With a fucking spoon 1177 00:54:57,051 --> 00:54:58,759 trying to get it out. 1178 00:55:02,467 --> 00:55:04,567 A hundred days he was sober, Fiona. 1179 00:55:06,968 --> 00:55:08,426 Who? 1180 00:55:10,259 --> 00:55:11,634 Jason. 1181 00:55:13,468 --> 00:55:15,206 My sponsee. 1182 00:55:15,207 --> 00:55:17,009 Who? 1183 00:55:17,010 --> 00:55:18,608 Jason from the shop. 1184 00:55:19,759 --> 00:55:21,463 I'm his sponsor. 1185 00:55:21,464 --> 00:55:24,801 You just got my sponsee fucking drunk. 1186 00:55:24,802 --> 00:55:26,926 He didn't say he was your... 1187 00:55:26,927 --> 00:55:28,384 A hundred days, 1188 00:55:28,385 --> 00:55:29,868 he was sober! 1189 00:55:41,131 --> 00:55:43,509 And that's sad. I'm sorry for him. 1190 00:55:45,629 --> 00:55:47,845 But it's not my fault. I didn't know. 1191 00:55:49,331 --> 00:55:51,131 No, nothing's your fault anymore, huh? 1192 00:55:52,306 --> 00:55:54,097 You weren't there. You don't know. 1193 00:55:54,098 --> 00:55:56,287 I know someone waved vodka in his face. 1194 00:55:57,093 --> 00:56:00,074 I know when he left you, he called his dealer 1195 00:56:00,075 --> 00:56:01,582 and he shot up heroin. 1196 00:56:04,510 --> 00:56:06,676 Oh. 1197 00:56:08,802 --> 00:56:10,182 I'm sorry. 1198 00:56:11,010 --> 00:56:12,494 Look, I didn't know. 1199 00:56:18,385 --> 00:56:20,360 No, you didn't care enough to know. 1200 00:56:31,968 --> 00:56:33,140 Listen to me. 1201 00:56:37,427 --> 00:56:39,529 I want you out of this fucking house. 1202 00:57:11,743 --> 00:57:13,451 What'd I miss? 1203 00:57:13,452 --> 00:57:14,661 Uh... 1204 00:57:16,760 --> 00:57:18,676 Ooh, candy corn. 1205 00:57:21,202 --> 00:57:27,202 Sync and corrections by btsix www.addic7ed.com